On Borrowed Time
by panskiss123
Summary: When Peeta goes missing before his 16th birthday, everyone believes him to be dead but Katniss knows in her heart he's alive, somehow, somewhere. When Prim gets sick and Katniss agrees to marry a Peacekeeper so she may buy medicine for her sister, what happens when there is no baker's son to save her? (I promise its Everlark in the end) Rated M for language, sex, graphic violence.
1. Chapter 1

When she was five, she gripped her father's hand as he lead her to school. She trembled as she entered the gigantic building filled with unfamiliar faces. Her father squeezed her hand and gave her a kindly smile.

"You will be just fine, little Katkin. You're going to make so many new friends. You'll love it here." She nodded bravely but inside, she continued to tremble.

A little boy with blonde curls and the brightest blue eyes she had ever seen was standing with his mother in the corner of the room. Their eyes met and he gave her a shy smile. His eyes lingered on her even after she looked away and continued talking to her daddy.

At lunch, the shy little boy opened his lunch bag to discover his father had snuck in two cookies. Smiling, he stuffed one into his mouth and closed his eyes at the sweet taste. After all, his daddy was the best baker in the world. Beside him, the little silver-eyed girl was finishing her sandwich and he stared at his remaining cookie. He turned to her and held it in his palm.

"Would you like a cookie?" Her eyes narrowed in suspicion and she cocked her head, her two dark braids nearly smacked her in the face.

"Why," she asked in a low voice.

"It's yummy. My daddy makes yummy cookies."

"Your daddy makes cookies?"

"Yours doesn't?" She shook her head but stared at the sweet in his hand.

"Go on. Take it." She did so and stuffed it into her mouth. He gave her a grin, which she returned.

"I'm Peeta."

"Ka-nish," she said through her cookie. They gasped as a loud bell rang and their teacher hurried forward.

"Come on children, time to go back!" Peeta gathered his trash and threw it away but lost sight of the little silver-eyed girl.

Back in their classroom, they all sat around in a circle while their teacher talked about the history of Panem and lots of other boring stuff that Peeta didn't really care about. His attention was caught, however, when his teacher asked if anyone knew the Valley Song and a little hand shot straight up into the air.

"Katniss, stand up please," the teacher said kindly. The little silver-eyed girl stood and smoothed out her red dress. Peeta couldn't help but sit up straighter. The little girl cleared her throat and her eyes met his.

She was singing to him, he decided. Her voice was unlike anything he had ever heard before. He swore even the birds perched out on the sill had stopped to listen. Her voice was crystal clear and her eyes shone while she sang. Peeta sighed and clutched his knees to his chest, his face breaking into a broad smile. When she finished, he clapped the loudest of his classmates. She sat back in her spot, looking flushed but pleased.

His father was the one who picked him up from school and he gripped his son's hand as he lead him away from school.

"Did you have a good day son?"

"Uh huh. I saw the prettiest girl, daddy!"

"Ah my youngest son's already in love, eh," the kindly baker chuckled. "Tell me, who has captured your heart?"

"Katniss," he said, relishing the way her name felt on his tongue.

"Ah, the little Everdeen girl, eh?" Peeta didn't know her last name so he merely shrugged.

"With hair as black as a raven and eyes made of silver?"

"Yes! She's the one," Peeta said excitedly. His daddy smiled but shook his head.

"I should have known. Why are you so drawn to her, my boy?"

"When she sings, the birds stop singing," Peeta said wistfully. The baker chuckled softly.

"Ah so she's bewitched you with her voice, has she? You know I used to know her mother. We were almost together but then she chose the miner."

"Stead of you? How come?"

"Because my boy, it's just like your little songbird. When they sing, the birds stop to listen."

"She's so pretty, daddy," Peeta said with a smile as they neared the bakery. "I'm gonna marry her one day."

"Is that so? We'd better start training you on how to be a good husband then. You'll have to provide for her and care for her and love her."

"And bake for her," Peeta broke in happily. "I can do all that."

"And be honest with her," his father said in a serious tone. "Women need honesty. They need sensitive men who will be gentle but strong. You'll be tender with her but be ready to stand up for her if she ever needs."

"You'll teach me all the things to be a good husband," the little boy said eagerly. The baker ruffled his son's curls.

"I'll teach you everything I can, so when the time comes for you to ask your songbird to marry you, she can't refuse."

* * *

Peeta watched his songbird every day in school. Sometimes he would offer her the sweets he brought from home, which she eagerly accepted. She would even give him a kind smile in return.

They didn't speak but he knew certain things about her. She had a little sister named Primrose, whom Katniss adored. Katniss's father was a hunter, the best in the district, and it was said that Katniss would take after him. Her two braids became one long one and her eyes looked like they were made of starlight. Peeta had never seen such lovely eyes.

And then one day, the starlight vanished. There was an accident in town, his father said in a hushed voice. Lots of men had died. Katniss's father, the man who sang, was among them.

Katniss and Primrose disappeared from school and Peeta missed his songbird. When they returned, everything had changed.

Katniss never sang again. Her eyes didn't shine, her clothes became much too big, her cheeks became sunken in. Peeta watched her at lunch when she would open her bag, her face would fall, and she would pull out a tiny crust of bread. He started to sneak cookies and other small sweets into her locker and watched her to make sure she got them. The first time she opened her locker and found food, her eyes narrowed in suspicion and she looked around the hall. Peeta hid around the corner and continued to watch her. His eyes widened when she skipped over to her sister and presented her with the treat. The first time it happened, Peeta got upset. Why didn't she eat it herself?

* * *

As time went on, he discovered that she cared more about her sister than herself. Primrose meant everything to Katniss, so Peeta tried to sneak Katniss two treats rather than one. He hoped she would keep one for herself.

Sometimes she did. Sometimes she would break one in half and he watched with a smile as she enjoyed the little piece of cookie before giving the rest to Prim.

But cookies and sweets didn't fill the stomach with nutrients. Katniss's clothes hung off her frame and Peeta saw the bones in her hands. She was dying. And he couldn't do a thing to stop it.

Where was her mother, he thought angrily. Why wasn't she helping her daughters? But he didn't dare bring it up to anyone. His mother would not hesitate in having Katniss and Primrose carted off to the community home, he knew. She hated anyone from the Seam. And for some reason, her eyes flashed with rage whenever Katniss's or any of the Everdeens names were mentioned.

* * *

It was three months after the mining accident when Peeta was working in the back of the bakery. His mother was sweeping out front, his brothers cleaning the cabinets and his father working on a toasting cake for a Merchant bride. Peeta peered into the ovens to check on the bread on the rack and pulled up a stool to watch his father work. He smiled at the baker's intricate designs and hoped one day he would be that talented. His father noticed him watching and opened his mouth to speak when they heard his mother shriek.

"And stay away from here! The next time I see you going through our trash, I will call the Peacekeepers, do you hear me you little Seam brat?" Peeta hurried to the window and his heart raced as Katniss Everdeen stumbled into view. She collapsed against their apple tree and pulled her knees to her chest. The rain was coming down hard and it looked like she was freezing. The door burst open and his mother came in, grumbling about Seam trash. Peeta glanced back at the bread and bit his lip. He moved closer to the oven and leaned against it. Shaking it ever so slightly, he saw the two loaves tip off the rack and plunge into the fire.

"Oh no," he cried, throwing the oven open and grabbing a spatula to rescue the bread.

"You idiot!" He felt a sharp pain in the back of his neck and his hand flew to the spot he had been hit. He felt the pain in his knuckles as his mother brought the rolling pin down again.

"You are useless, Peeta Mellark! Useless! No one is going to buy burned bread! What are we going to do with you? Take it and feed it to the pigs! Now!" He nodded and frantically scooped up the bread into his apron. Only the edges were burned but the rest of the bread looked fine. He suppressed a smile and hurried past his mother but she followed him out back.

"You can't do one simple task, Peeta! One task! Don't let the bread burn! WHY do we put up with you!" She struck him across the cheek and he stumbled backwards.

"I'm sorry, Mom!"

"Sorry isn't going to give us more flour and nuts! After you get rid of this, you go straight to bed. No dinner for you tonight!" He tore off the burned end of the bread and tossed it into the pigpen. Finally his mother turned on her heel and slammed the door behind her. Peeta glanced out across the way, where Katniss was still huddled against the tree. Peeta stepped off the porch and looked over his shoulder to make sure his mother wasn't watching. He bit his lip when Katniss lifted her head and their eyes met. His heart sank at how defeated she looked. Her eyes were dull and lifeless, and he didn't know if it was rain water or tears that stained her cheeks. Still looking over his shoulder, he tossed the two loaves toward her. Not looking back, he hurried back onto the porch and yanked the door open. Finally he turned back to her and saw her watching him. He gave her a little nod before closing the door. She held the precious bread to her chest as she ran away from the bakery. Peeta sighed and leaned against the door. Maybe he had saved her, given her another day. Maybe now things would get better.

He went to bed that night with his stomach empty but his heart full of hope.

* * *

The next day, he saw her watching him at school. He wanted to speak to her but the bruises his mother had given him that morning were ugly and he was sure she would be embarrassed to be seen with him. Still, she watched him. Until she turned and away and he watched her pick a dandelion. She held it to her chest, as if it was precious to her, almost as precious as the bread. She gave him one last glance before she ran off to get her sister.

After that, things did get better. She started showing up at the bakery to trade squirrels and other small animals with his father. The baker would always give her a fresh loaf and told his wife that he had gotten the food from the butcher.

Life seemed to return to her eyes. Though they didn't shine as they once had, her cheeks were no longer sunken in and her hair was not dull and brittle. He noticed her hanging around another person from the Seam, who looked like he could be her cousin.

Katniss no longer smiled or laughed or sang. But she lived. And that was what was most important to Peeta at that time.

* * *

And the years went on and the shy little boy continued to watch his silver-eyed songbird from afar. He was a good student, always being pushed to do even better by his perfectionist mother, and he started helping at the bakery even more. His artistry led to beautiful cakes and intricate designs in the windows. He noticed Katniss would often bring her sister to see the beautiful cakes in the windows; he hid like a coward until the girls were gone. Every now and again, he swore Katniss was looking right at him. He pressed himself against the brick wall, dreaming of hearing her say his name.

He also discovered a love for painting, trying to find the right berries to mix for paints. At school, he made the wrestling team. This was something his mother bragged about; he quickly became the top wrestler, beating his older brother at the Junior Championship. He noticed, with a flutter in his heart, that Katniss was always in the front row at his matches.

At Peeta's first Reaping, he held his breath, pleading to the gods that Katniss would be spared. And each year she was. Every year that she was safe, he sank to his knees and lowered his forehead to the ground, whispering his thanks.

* * *

A week before his 16th birthday, everything changed. There was a knock at the door one night; his brother flipped the light on, grumbling how late it was. His father hurried to the door and he could hear clipped voices. His older brother suddenly appeared over his bed, looking frantic.

"Peeta, hide now!"

"What?" He yanked his younger brother from the bed and pushed him toward the closet.

"Get in there and stay put!"

"But-"

"That one! Grab him!" Blackness overtook Peeta and then, he remembered nothing.

* * *

Katniss rapped on the door and waited patiently. Gale shifted from side to side and shook his head.

"Catnip, let's go! They're not answering!"

"The baker always trades with us on Sundays." She lifted her hand to knock again but the door was yanked open and she smiled when she saw not the baker, but the eldest son.

"Um, hello. I'm Katniss Ever-"

"I know who you are," he hissed. "We can't trade with you today. Go away." And then he slammed the door shut. Katniss jumped, taken aback.

"That was strange."

"Can we get out of here now?"

"Did you see his face? He had a black eye and was covered in bruises."

"So what? Catnip, let's go!" She nodded and he took off down the lane. He was always uncomfortable in the Merchant side of town. She started to follow him but glanced upwards at what she was sure was Peeta's room. The curtains were drawn tightly; strange, she thought, because the windows were usually always open. I hope everything is alright, she thought to herself.

* * *

She didn't see him at school anymore. Rumors flew about the youngest Mellark boys. That they were sent to live with Mrs. Mellark's strange uncle, who was essentially a hermit and didn't associate with society. That they had gotten into a brawl and had killed each other. That they had fled into the woods at the fear of being Reaped. All of them rumors but one thing was certain; Ryen and Peeta Mellark were gone.

Katniss tried not to let them see her hands shaking as their whispers got louder. Two of the girls were saying their own mother had killed the boys.

"I mean, did you ever see the bruises on Peeta's face? I heard she beat him. I think she finally killed him and his brother tried to help. She killed him too." Katniss slammed her pencil down and turned to glare at the girls.

"You don't know what you're talking about," she hissed. "Peeta is alive!"

"Oh yeah? Then where is he?"

"I don't know but he's not dead. He can't be." She turned back around in her seat and stared at the blackboard. He can't be dead. He was the only kind one left, the one person who had saved her life…

She pushed her desk forward and grabbed the hall pass. She locked the bathroom door behind her and collapsed in the floor. She lowered her face to her hands and allowed the tears to come. She said a silent prayer to whoever might be listening for the boy with the bread.

"Let him be safe," she sobbed. She hadn't ever thanked him. She doubted he knew exactly what that bread had meant but it saved not only her life, but her mother's and Prim's too. It gave her the hope to go on, to never give up, no matter how hopeless things had gotten. Peeta had been Katniss's saving grace and she'd never gotten to thank him for that.

"Please. Let him be safe and come back to me one day."


	2. Chapter 2

_**thank you Yoeda! ;)**_

* * *

Panem crumbled and its people suffered. President Snow ruled with an iron fist and whispers flew that he was starting to fade. But that didn't stop him from Reaping children for the Hunger Games, or the excessive taxes he pushed on his citizens, or the terror everyone lived in day in and day out.

District 12 was starving and both Merchant and Seam knew the pangs of hunger. People committed unspeakable acts to feed their families.

Despite her growling stomach, Katniss woke up with a smile. She glanced sideways at her little sister, who continued to sleep, before moving off the bed. She quickly dressed and ran her fingers through her hair. The sun had not quite risen yet so she grabbed her hunting jacket from the wall and laced up her boots. Summer had come early to the district and she was already sweating when she arrived at the lake. She tossed her jacket and her shirt aside and shoved her pants down her legs before leaping into the cool water. She shook her wet braid out of her face and relaxed on her back.

"Seriously? You're going to drown yourself on your birthday," came a laughing voice. She gasped and sank back into the water, coughing.

"Damn you, Gale. You scared me."

"Hey, come out of there. I have something for you." He turned away while she dried off and slipped back into her clothes.

"What do you mean, you have something for me?" He turned back to her and gave her a smile.

"Well I couldn't forget your big birthday, Catnip! You're free from the Reaping! It's official!" Katniss couldn't help but smile and Gale reached into his pocket.

"This is only temporary until I can get you a real ring." He withdrew a ring made of yarn and wire and held it in his shaking hand. Katniss stared with wide eyes and finally looked up at him.

"Gale-"

"Catnip, Prim's older now and doesn't need you to take care of her anymore. Your mom is better and, well, I figure now you can do something for yourself now."

"What are you talking about?"

"Marry me, Catnip! Be my wife." She took a step backwards and he frowned.

"You don't want to marry me?"

"Gale you're my best friend. But have you ever heard me say I want to get married?"

"It makes sense for us to be together." Her brow furrowed and she stepped back again.

"And that's the only reason to get married?"

"Well no, but I mean, it just makes sense! We've taken care of each other since we were kids. I could take care of you."

"How, Gale? You take care of your family already. Four extra mouths to feed and now you want to add on mine and Prim's and my mom's?"

"I wouldn't mind," he shrugged.

"Gale, we don't have to do this. I like being your friend but I don't really think of anyone…in that way."

"So you don't want to marry me," he said, lowering his hand.

"I'm sorry, Gale. You know how I feel about you. But I don't want to get married." He shoved the ring back into his pocket and his nostrils flared.

"Fine."

"Gale don't do this. Come on, come have a swim with me on my birthday."

"I have to get back to the mines. I just wanted to come tell you happy birthday." He gave her a quick kiss on the forehead and stuck his hands in his pockets.

"Don't forget, we have Rosalie's toasting this evening."

"Oh I completely forgot! You still want to go to that?"

"I don't particularly want to attend a peacekeeper's wedding but we've known Rosalie for years, so I guess we should go."

"Besides, it's Darius. He's always been a good guy." Gale shrugged.

"He's still a peacekeeper."

"Not all peacekeepers are terrible, Gale. And he'll take good care of her."

"I think this new trend is pathetic." She frowned.

"What trend?"

"Marrying peacekeepers for stability and wealth. It's sick. Almost as sick as the Hunger Games."

"Gale, some people don't have a choice. They're doing what they have to do to survive."

"You're telling me you would marry a peacekeeper just because he could keep you fed?" She recoiled at his tone.

"I told you I don't want to get married. To anyone."

"Ok fine. I'll see you at the toasting. Happy birthday, Katniss." She nodded as he turned and stomped, flat-footed, out of the woods. She sighed and dropped her hands to her side. How did this day go so wrong already? She turned back to her sparkling lake and sighed.

"I miss you, Daddy." Above her, the mockingjays sang, which was a clear sign that her father was with her. She smiled up at the sky and whipped around, her braid smacking her in the face. She crept to the hollowed in tree, where she kept her bow hidden. Actually it was her father's bow but he had showed her out to shoot. After his death, she'd started venturing out into the woods to bring food home to her family. She waited on the cold ground until a deer made itself known. She gasped at its majesty, silently thanking it for what it would mean to her family. It was quick and painless;

Katniss was an excellent shot. She wished Gale was still here to help her cart it back to town but she flung the deer over her shoulder and started back toward the Seam. Luckily it was still a young buck, its antlers not quite grown in. She made deals with Rooba, the butcher and Sae, the elderly woman at the Hob. They gave her good deals on the meat and she smiled as the coins clinked together in her pocket.

"Sit down, girl, and enjoy a bowl of soup for your birthday," Sae urged her and set a steaming bowl in front of her. Katniss accepted the gift but slipped a coin into Sae's pocket before she left. She wandered up and down the aisles, stopping when she saw the baker right in front of her. The old man had always been kind to her but she hated how sad he always looked now. Ever since the death of his sons, he'd been solemn and soft-spoken. His witch of a wife had practically taken over the bakery and ran the business with a hard heart. She never spoke either son's name and Katniss honestly believed the rumor that she had killed them both. The baker was purchasing a bag of flour when he spotted Katniss.

"Ah, I think it's someone's birthday today!" She blushed but nodded.

"It is, sir."

"Well happy birthday, dear girl. You're finally safe from the Reaping. Here's a little something for you to enjoy with your sister." He slid a giant cookie into her hand and her eyes widened.

"Sir, I can't-"

"Please, Miss Everdeen. Take it. My son would want you to have it." Her eyes widened even more at the mention of his son. He sighed heavily and stuffed his hand into his pocket.

"I, uh, have something else for you. It's a gift, you see, from…from my son." She watched him warily, afraid to receive any more gifts.

"I haven't been able to go into their bedroom in a long time," he said gruffly. "And I was, uh, cleaning some things out when I found this. He…he wanted you to have it." He handed her a rolled up sheet of paper with her name on it and her hands shook as she opened it. Her loud gasp made his eyes soften.

A dandelion, in incredible detail and beautiful color. Katniss had never seen such vibrant color on paper before. His name was scrawled at the bottom and she ran her finger over the charcoal.

"Peeta was quite fond of you, my dear," the baker said softly. "And I'm sure he would want me to wish you a very happy birthday." She nodded faintly and he gave her a weak smile as he flung the bag of flour over his shoulder and took his leave.

Katniss stared at the artwork in her hand her entire walk home.

"Peeta," she whispered.

"Happy birthday, Katniss!" She looked up to see her mother and sister standing in the doorway with broad smiles on their faces. She rolled the paper up and stuck it in her back pocket as she entered the house and accepted their kisses.

"My beautiful girl is nineteen," her mother hugged her tightly.

"Katniss, that cookie is huge! Where did you get it?"

"Oh the baker gave it to me. Have a piece." Prim shook her head.

"It's your birthday, Katniss, you eat it."

"I want to share it with you. He said to share it." Prim reluctantly accepted the treat and closed her eyes at the flavors.

"It's so good. That was so nice of him."

"What's in your pocket, dear?" Her mother indicated the paper and Katniss pulled it out. She wasn't sure she wanted to share the beauty with anyone else but she unrolled it and Prim gasped.

"That's beautiful."

"It's from Peeta. I mean…Peeta's father…he said Peeta would want me to have it." Prim and her mother traded looks as Katniss folded it back up.

"I need to get ready for Rosalie's toasting. Prim, are you coming with me?"

"Mom is taking me to deliver the Thorne's baby tonight but you have fun! Did you see Darius today?"

"No, I'm sure he's busy, Prim. Getting married and all."

"She's the fifth this month," Prim said uncertainly. "To marry a peacekeeper, I mean." Her mother looked quickly at her.

"Peacekeepers have money, Prim. And there are some, like Darius, who are good men."

"Are you ever going to get married, Katniss?" Katniss gave her sister a sharp look and sucked in her breath. She hadn't told them about Gale's proposal and she didn't know if she wanted to.

"I don't think so. No one around here I would want to marry."

"What if Peeta Mellark were still around," Prim teased.

"Primrose," their mother said sharply. Prim's shoulders fell when she saw the sadness on Katniss's face.

"Oh Katty, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to tease."

"It's ok. I'm going to take a bath."

She rounded the corner and heard her mother scolding Prim.

"You know how hard his death was on her. Do you like to see your sister in pain?"

"She didn't even know him. I don't understand why she's like this-"

Katniss closed her eyes and continued to her room. It hurt that her mother was the one who could see what Peeta had meant to her but her little sister couldn't. Prim was always observant when it came to Katniss. They were closer than close. But Katniss had always been closed off and the only person she did talk to was Prim. Why, then, didn't she understand what Peeta had done for their family?

She shook her head and stripped off her sweaty clothes. The little bucket they used was tiny but she bathed quickly and braided her wet hair down her back. There was a knock at the door and Katniss turned as her mother peered in.

"You dropped this in the kitchen," she held out Peeta's drawing and Katniss nodded as her mother set it on the dresser.

"Are you alright, Katniss?"

"Mom, you think there are more peacekeepers like Darius?" Her mother frowned only for a moment.

"I think a peacekeeper is just like a Capitolite. There are good ones and bad ones. Misunderstood and misinformed. Darius is a good man and I think he will take good care of Rosalie. Heaven knows she needs it, after everything that girl has been through." Katniss nodded and went back to braiding her hair.

"Why do you ask?" She felt her mother's hands in her hair and her own hands fell to her side.

"I don't ever want to get married…but I see how skinny Prim is and I think, it might not be such a bad thing, to be married to a peacekeeper. If he can keep us fed."

"So Rosalie has talked you into it?"

"I didn't say that," Katniss snapped. She gave her mother an apologetic look in the mirror and shook her head. "I'm sorry. What I mean is, people around the Hob have been talking about it and more young girls are signing up for it. It's much better than going to Cray."

"Yes," her mother said slowly. "But you forfeit what freedom you have, the right to marry who you choose."

"But I don't want to marry anyone, Mom. So it's kind of perfect for me, don't you think?"

"Oh Katniss," her mother sighed and slowly turned her daughter to face her. Katniss was startled at the tears in her mother's eyes.

"I haven't done right by either of you. I still regret leaving you to take care of this family. I was…sick for so long that I didn't see what was becoming of my little girls. And now…I want to talk you out of this, Katniss, but I don't know if I can. We need the money. Prim just took out more tesserae and that scares me."

"I told her not to," Katniss said angrily.

"I know but we needed the food." Katniss turned back to the mirror, squeezing her eyes shut.

"You have grown into such a beautiful, strong young lady Katniss. And we are alive because of you. Don't think that you have to do this. We can manage. Somehow, we'll manage without someone else's help." But Katniss heard the doubt in her mother's voice. She sighed and examined her hair.

"Thank you. It's beautiful."

"You are beautiful." Her mother gave her a soft kiss on the cheek and turned to go.

"Give my best to Rosalie and Darius." Katniss nodded and her mother left her to herself. Katniss stared at herself in the mirror, her eyes raking over her figure. Her mother was wrong. She was not beautiful. She was far too skinny and boney, her breasts flat and almost non-existent, and with a stick for hair. Her nose was too pointed and her features too sharp. There was nothing comely about her. What man would want to marry her?

She shook her head and grabbed her boots to lace up. The toasting ceremony was in half an hour and it was clear on the other side of the Seam. She grabbed her jacket and said a hurried goodbye to her family.

As she walked, her mind raced. Would it be so terrible, to be married? What would Gale say if she married a peacekeeper rather than him? Oh he would be livid for sure but did she really care? Could she see herself married to him? He was her hunting partner and really, the only friend she had if you didn't count Madge Undersee. He was right; it made sense for them to be together but was that reason enough to marry? Not in her eyes.

But then, she would never marry for love because there was no one TO love. Marriage was for convenience and stability. Her mother and father had fallen deeply in love and look what happened to them. When her father died, her mother had all but died as well. Slipped into a depression so deep that she hadn't noticed her own daughters were dying. She never wanted to end up that way. That's why she said she would never marry. Marriage also lead to children and she would not stand by and watch her child be Reaped for the Games. No, she never wanted to fall in love. And if she wasn't going to marry or love Gale, was it a bad thing to marry for stability? So her sister could develop curves, the way a fifteen year old girl should? Katniss would do anything to keep her sister happy. And that included giving up her own freedom.

The Peacekeepers' barracks came into view as she climbed over the hill. The Capitol had set aside a row of houses for high-ranking peacekeepers but their Head Peacekeeper, Cray, preferred to live nearer to town.

She was out of breath when she reached the bottom and took a moment to clutch the stitch in her chest. She saw Gale and his sister Posy waiting on the porch, saying hello to people. Or rather, Posy was saying hello while Gale was brooding, looking immensely moody. Posy caught sight of her and waved.

"Katniss! Happy birthday, Katniss!"

"Thank you, Posy," she said as she swept the little girl into a hug.

"Gale," Posy smacked her brother. "Say happy birthday to Katniss!"

"I already gave her my birthday greetings," he said coldly. "Have you had a good birthday, Katniss?"

"It's been great, thank you." He nodded, his jaw set. Katniss rolled her eyes. Really mature, Gale. An arm winded around her waist and she squealed.

"Why Miss Everdeen, taking the time out of your birthday to come spend it with little ole me!" She laughed and hit the young man playfully on the chest.

"I had to come see you make a fool of yourself!"

"A fool indeed! It's only fools that fall in love, isn't it? And I think I'm more of a fool than anyone because that creature yonder, that beautiful creature has rendered me speechless." Darius winked at her as he strode across the field to capture his bride in a kiss. Rosalie squealed but succumbed to the affection. Katniss watched them with a smile while Gale just grunted and threw back a glass of brown liquid. Posy squealed and clapped her hands together.

"It's so romantic," she sighed.

"Come on, Posy, let's go get some cake," Gale turned to go inside and waited for his sister to join him.

"You two go ahead, I'm going to talk to Rosalie." Katniss moved off the porch and toward Rosalie, who was the definition of a blushing bride. Her mother's worn dress and veil looked beautiful on her and her dark hair was cut just below her shoulders, signifying that she was a bride.

"Katniss!" She threw her arms around her and Katniss patted her on the back clumsily.

"Congratulations, Rosalie. You look beautiful!"

"Oh Katniss, I love your hair! It's so pretty! Thank you so much for coming!"

"Of course. You and Darius seem very happy."

"I know it's strange and that people aren't going to believe me," she said carefully, glancing over at her new husband. "But I really am. He's really a good man. And treats me like a woman instead of a piece of property."

"That's rare in a man," Katniss said honestly. Rosalie nodded and a dark look covered her face.

"After…well, everything, I didn't think it was possible to be happy again," she said softly. "But Darius proved me wrong. He found me and took care of me. Can you believe he is willing to raise another man's child as his own? And actually excited about it?"

"He's a good one," Katniss agreed. Rosalie had been one of the many young girls whose boyfriend had gotten them pregnant and abandoned them. Unfortunately for Rosalie, it went a step further; her family had kicked her out and her boyfriend had beaten her, hoping to get rid of the baby. Darius had found her, close to death at the fence and had taken her home to care for her. They quickly fell in love and he'd asked her to marry him several weeks later. After he'd taken her to Mrs. Everdeen to make sure the child was alright, he swore he would raise it as his own. Mrs. Everdeen was just as shocked as everyone else in the district. Rosalie was a lucky one, that was for sure.

"I'm very happy for you, Rosie," Katniss said. Rosalie squeezed her hand and they were cut off by more well-wishers. Katniss slipped back into the crowd, heading toward the food table.

The cake was quite beautiful and had to have come from Mellark Bakery. She caught sight of Madge in the corner and munched on the cake as she made her way over to her friend.

She and Madge had been friends in school, even though one was from the Seam and the other was Merchant. They didn't talk a lot and Katniss liked it that way. They rarely hung out outside of school and now that school was over, she didn't see her as much. Madge's face lit up when she saw Katniss.

"Katniss, hi!"

"How have you been, Madge?"

"I've been alright. I was hoping I would run into you today." Katniss leaned against the wall beside Madge and stuck a forkful of cake into her mouth. The flavors attacked her taste buds and she closed her eyes to savor the sweet that was flooding her mouth.

"I'm getting married," Madge said quietly. Katniss's eyes shot open and she gasped, nearly swallowing the fork.

"What," she choked out. Madge looked thoroughly depressed as she nodded.

"My father told me last night. A man sent a letter, asking for my hand and Father accepted his offer. Apparently he's a Peacekeeper from 2, relocating to 12."

"A Peacekeeper?" Madge's father was the Mayor so it was no surprise that she would have an arranged marriage but Katniss figured that she would marry higher than a peacekeeper.

"Apparently one of the wealthier ones in 2. Lucky me," Madge said viciously.

"Oh Madge, I'm…" she was about to say she was sorry but that was the wrong sentiment. Congratulations, wasn't it? Except Madge did not look the least bit happy about it.

"I'm sure he'll be a good man. Your father would want to make sure you are taken care of." Madge scoffed and shook her blonde curls out of her eyes.

"He just wants to make sure I'm married off before I'm twenty. He doesn't want me an old spinster. He doesn't care if the man takes care of me or not." Katniss chewed on her lip.

"Do you anything about him?"

"Only that he's relocating to 12. Apparently a big group of them are relocating together. I don't know why 12 needs so many peacekeepers but I overheard Daddy talking to Haymitch Abernathy just a few minutes ago. They are going to hold a giant auction, to find wives for all of them."

"An auction?" It made Katniss sick and Madge nodded darkly.

"These are some of Snow's best peacekeepers and they have agreed to pay a sum to "purchase" a wife," Madge looked positively disgusted. "Because I'm the Mayor's daughter, I'm not being purchased. I'm just being handed to him like some goddamn trophy."

"I'm sorry, Madge." Madge squeezed her eyes shut and shook her head.

"Anyway, I want you to be there. I don't care about that bullshit about Merchant toastings in private, you're….well, you're my best friend Katniss. I want you there. I hope he wears a suit, like Darius. I hate those uniforms they wear. Makes them look like robots." Katniss was startled to hear Madge refer to her as her best friend; after all, they hardly talked. But she nodded.

"Of course I'll be there! I'll even help you plan it…if you want. Not that I would be any good at that," she added hastily and Madge gave her a sad smile.

"I know I won't."

"Maybe he'll be a good one, like Darius," Katniss offered. "Maybe you'll actually like him? You might even fall in love with him."

"Love," Madge scoffed. "It's a fairytale, Katniss. Don't buy into it."

"I won't," she replied stiffly.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bring everyone down. How is the cake?"

"It's delicious. Not that I have much to compare it to but it's from Mellark's, isn't it?"

"He makes the best cakes in the district. I hate that Peeta and Ryen are gone. With Bing taking over his father-in-law's business, there's no one to take over the bakery when Mr. Mellark wants to retire. Mrs. Mellark sure wants to close it down."

"That witch," Katniss growled and Madge looked surprised. Katniss just shook her head and fell silent; why was she being reminded of Peeta so much today?

"You're not having a piece?" She noticed Madge's empty hands. The blonde girl shrugged.

"Mother wants me to watch my figure since I'm to be a bride." Katniss did not miss the venom in her friend's voice. They fell silent, watching the festivities.

"Oh my goodness, I forgot to say happy birthday!"

"Oh, thank you."

"Gosh, Katniss, it's your 19th! You're free from the Reaping! That's a big deal."

"I know, I just…we don't really celebrate birthdays in the Seam. But Mr. Mellark gave me a cookie today."

"That's so nice of him. Well, let's pretend this is your birthday cake," her hand hovered over the cake, like a flickering flame, and she smiled. "Make a wish!" Katniss returned the smile and closed her eyes. She searched her brain until a wish, her only wish, came to the front of her mind. She pretended to blow out the flame and Madge clapped.

"What did you wish for?"

"Can't tell," she stared at the cake with glassy eyes. "Otherwise, it won't come true."


	3. Chapter 3

Katniss, wait up!" Katniss paused so Darius could catch up to her.

"Hey, I wanted to say thank you for coming today. I know it means a lot to Rosalie and it means a lot to me too."

"You're a good man, Darius."

"So I've been hearing all day," he chuckled but it didn't quite reach his eyes.

"You are," she said earnestly. "You'll take good care of her." He nodded and glanced back at Rosalie.

"She snuck up on me." Katniss nodded and patted his arm.

"Hey, I wanted to talk to you for just a second…I overheard you and Madge talking earlier…about the auction next week." Her eyes widened but he shook his head.

"Don't worry, I won't repeat anything you ladies said. I just wanted to…correct a couple of things she said. And to tell you…I think you should think about signing up, Katniss." She took a step back, startled.

"Excuse me?"

"Hear me out," he said hurriedly. "It's not quite as loathsome as it sounds. The auction is really a big party, meant for the guys to get to know the ladies. I know a lot of these men coming to 12 and believe me, they're decent men. Most of them. They're just looking for someone to take care of, and someone to bring a little beauty to their homes. And I know you've been having a hard time keeping your sister healthy." He cast her a worried glance and her gaze dropped to the ground.

"I'm sorry, I don't want to upset you. I just think you should consider it. You're a beautiful girl, Katniss, and you're smart and funny and hell, any guy would be lucky to have you as his bride."

"You're crazy," she shook her head in disbelief.

"Believe me or don't. But I can tell you what they're paying…it will keep Prim fed for three years at least. Plus you'd get a weekly allowance until the contract is up. You're only committed to him for five years. After that, you can take the money and run. Or you can extend the contract. Your choice." Katniss hated herself for considering this. Positively hated herself.

"The Capitol is really going to allow that many divorces?"

"The Capitol doesn't give a damn about marriages in 12," he shrugged.

"And divorce isn't unheard of around here. The details can be discussed between you and the man. I suppose if you're really opposed to marriage, you can discuss it just being a contract and you being his…mistress." They both winced at that word.

"What about…children," she said in a small voice.

"Again, that's between you and your husband-to-be. You'd be a wife, Katniss, not a slave. I won't lie and say I'm not excited to be a father and I'm sure a lot of the guys would feel the same. Most of us just want families, like everyone else. The good thing is, peacekeepers' kids are safe from the Reaping." Katniss's jaw dropped; that was a surprise.

"Guess you didn't know that. Yeah, our children are safe but the boys do have to go into training in 2 for a couple of years. It's much better than being sent to the arena though, you have to admit." She nodded, looking pale. Darius set a hand on her shoulder and offered her a smile.

"Just think about it, alright? And hey. Thanks again for coming out." He squeezed her shoulder and turned to jog back to his wife. Katniss watched them for a few moments, a sad look crossing her face. She shook herself and turned to walk back home.

* * *

Now that Katniss was finished with school, her future was completely up in the air. She didn't want to go into the mines, like everyone else in the Seam. But she wasn't a healer like her mother and Prim. She didn't really have a trade skill, so she didn't know how she would find a job.

She continued to hunt and bring food to the Hob. At least she made coins from that. But Darius had warned her, the day before, to be careful. With the relocation of so many peacekeepers, the fence might be turned back on one day and she could be hurt or even arrested and killed if she was discovered.

Since it was her only livelihood, however, she continued to sneak under the fence. She sat atop her hill and watched as trucks rolled in, carrying what she knew were new men from District 2. She wondered what they were like. Did they act like Capitolites? How did they feel about being relocated to an outlining district like 12? The poorest you could be in. She brushed her pants off as she started back home, her stomach growling for dinner.

She froze, however, when she entered her house. Her mother looked solemn and still and hovered over the couch. Drawing nearer, Katniss saw Prim lying on the couch, very still.

"Prim?"

"She just fell asleep," her mother whispered. She gestured for Katniss to follow her into the kitchen and Katniss launched into making a pot of tea.

"What's wrong with her?"

"I'm not sure. She complained of a scratchy throat this morning and she can barely talk. She's been having difficulty breathing and I can't get her to eat anything. She has a fever but she's trembling. I don't know what to do, Katniss." She set the tea in front of her mother and collapsed in the chair. Her mother hid her face in her hands.

"Why don't you get some rest and I'll watch over her tonight? Hopefully she will feel better in the morning." Her mother nodded heavily and patted her daughter's hand before trudging off to the bedroom.

In the morning, Prim was worse. A red rash had spread all over her chest and arms and her tiny body shook with her coughing. Her mother stood in the corner, her hand over her mouth.

"Mom. What kind of medicine do we need?"

"Capitol medicine." Katniss understood what her mother was saying. Expensive. Very expensive. Medicine that Prim needed to survive. Katniss stood to her feet and swallowed heavily.

"Mom, I need you to braid my hair for me and I'd like to borrow some of your rose wash." Her mother nodded, her face grim. She didn't have to ask Katniss what she was planning. She already knew. And she hated herself for not being able to stop her daughter from selling her freedom to save another daughter. She hated herself for not protecting her children. As Katniss readied herself and left the house, Mrs. Everdeen fell to her knees and hid her face in her hands. Her child had grown up too fast; without one daughter's courage, another daughter would be lost. She sobbed into the threadbare carpet and clutched her heart. She was such a failure. A failure of a mother. As far as she was concerned, they were both lost to her.

* * *

Katniss's hand shook as she filled out the form and was told to go wait with the others. She didn't look at any of them as she passed. She sat straight-backed in the chair, her head held high. It didn't matter why she was doing this. It didn't matter why any of them were here. She knew some needed to feed their families while others felt like this was their last chance to find a husband. She tuned out the announcer's voice, her heart racing in her chest. She felt like she was on parade, and the audience of men was a Capitol audience, watching her march down the Avenue of Tributes. Darius was wrong; this wasn't a party. It was an auction block. And she was selling herself. She felt like a common whore.

The announcer, who sounded suspiciously like Claudius Templesmith, the announcer for the Hunger Games, gave the men a few moments to look at the women on the stage. Papers were being passed around and no one spoke. Finally, the announcer started to call names and the women rose to their feet. She nearly stumbled when she heard her own name being called. Glancing around, she wondered who had purchased her.

Her heart ceased to beat as the old peacekeeper, Cray, walked toward her with a crooked smile on his twisted face.

* * *

Katniss could hardly breathe as Cray took her hand in his.

"Well, well, Miss Everdeen. I've spent many a year watching you and here, I get the most excellent surprise." He leaned forward to kiss her cheek and she nearly gagged.

"Come, my dear. Let me show you your new home."

"If you please sir," her voice trembled, and she inwardly winced. "I don't have any of my things with me. If I could run back to my home and fetch my belongings-"

"Don't worry about it. You will have all new things. My bride deserves the best." She blanched and did her best to hide the tears. She would refuse to ever speak to Darius again after this. She hoped he would hear about what became of her and would feel some form of guilt. She doubted it though.

After all, she was just a common Seam girl who was fighting for survival, just like the rest of the country.

Cray kept a tight hold around her waist as he lead her to his house near Merchant Circle. Katniss stifled a cry as they passed the bakery and she stared at the large apple tree in their yard. Cray pushed the door open and guided her inside.

"I expect you're hungry. I'm famished myself. The kitchen is there on your right. Find something to make us some dinner." Katniss nodded and ran out of the room, desperate to be away from the old man. The kitchen was well stocked but Katniss did not how to cook very much. Her mother had always praised her stew so she hastily found some ingredients and tossed them all in a pot. She winced as she heard Cray come in behind her and her hand shook on the counter top.

"Do you know how to use a stovetop," his breath seemed to burn the back of her neck. She shook her head and he reached around, his chest pressed to her back. She tensed up as he pushed her forward, his hands moving around the counter.

"Light a flame right here. There we are. And now we make sure the flame catches and burns…set the pot over it. Good. See? It's much easier than setting it over a fire."

"Yes, sir," she said softly. She felt his nose on her cheek and she closed her eyes.

"Mmm, you smell heavenly." She fought to keep from turning her head.

"Thank you."

"After dinner, we have much to discuss." He left her alone to cook and she said a silent prayer of thanks.

After dinner, he lead her upstairs and he showed her where the bathroom and everything was. In the bedroom, he indicated a drawer full of ladies garments that she could choose from. She felt sick as she remembered how many ladies had come to this house. How many had worn these garments? She'd sooner go naked. But she forced herself to choose the long sleeve nightgown that covered all of her. She wondered if he would allow her to sleep in another room but that was a foolish hope. When he came back from the bathroom, he grinned over at her.

"You cover up that beautiful body of yours, my dearest. I long to see what you're hiding under there." Tears caught in her throat as he indicated for her to climb under the covers and he moved closer to her. She squeezed her eyes shut as he buried his face in her neck and inhaled her scent.

"Tell me, Katniss. Have you been touched by a man before?" Katniss silently pleaded for death to take her and swiftly.

"No sir."

"Truly? Not ever?"

"No sir. I have never even…kissed anyone before."

"Well we must rectify that, mustn't we?" Katniss fought with everything she had to stay still. His lips met hers and she did not respond. They were cold and chapped and she held her breath while he pressed against her mouth. She almost gagged when she felt his tongue, like a slimy worm prying her lips apart. She shook her head but this angered Cray.

"You are to be my wife, girl! You will succumb to your master!"

"I am not your wife yet, sir," she reminded him and his eyes narrowed.

"I should teach you your place, wench!" She braced herself for the blow but it did not come. Instead, he grabbed her and flung her from the bed. She trembled where she stood and thought very seriously about jumping out the window. Except it looked barred from the inside. He stood in front of her and cupped her chin.

"You dare to defy me? I hold your life in my hands, you stupid whore." She said nothing but continued to tremble.

"Better yet, I could return you and take someone else. I could take that pretty sister of yours."

"You won't touch her," she cried, and she froze at her own words. Her eyes widened in horror as she realized what she had done. Cray's lips turned into a cruel smile and he nodded.

"You love that little girl, don't you Katniss? You'd do anything for her?" Tears streaming down her cheeks, she nodded.

"So am I to assume you want me to continue to teach you your place?"

She took a deep breath and forced herself to think of Prim.

For Prim, she thought over and over. She nodded and he backhanded her across the face. She crashed to the ground and cried out as he grasped a fistful of her hair, dragging her to her knees.

"I look forward to teaching you how to be good to your master, Katniss. You have a lot to learn."

* * *

 _ **thank you guys for the awesome comments! I'm happy to be back and writing again! Will try not to let you freak out too long ;)**_

 _ **Xoxo**_


	4. Chapter 4

Katniss had been in Cray's house for three days and she didn't know if her family had heard what had happened to her. She barely recognized herself so she didn't know how her family would recognize her. She hoped someone had told them she was alright, in a manner of speaking. Alive, at least. She also hoped that the money would start to come soon, or it would be too late for Prim.

The wedding was planned for a week from today and nearly all of the townspeople were invited. Katniss wondered if her bruises would heal in time. Her last one, a black eye, was from asking if she could invite her family to the wedding.

Cray kept her busy, cleaning his house thoroughly and cooking meals for him. Not a slave indeed, Darius, she thought bitterly.

She heard him calling for her, not by name of course, he used "girl" but never her name; she felt like she'd lost everything, including her identity.

She hurried out of the kitchen before she angered him, for she had learned he did not like to be kept waiting.

She bowed her head as she entered the room and Cray held out his arms. She learned quickly that obedience and servitude would keep her alive.

Two things she normally rebelled against.

"There's my lovely girl. Fetch us some tea, dearest."

"Of course, sir." She rushed back to the kitchen to prepare the tea and bowed her head as she served it. When she lifted her head, she was taken aback by the other man in the room. He had short blonde hair and soft blue eyes. He looked like every other Merchant in 12 except he looked vaguely familiar. His face softened as he reached out to take his teacup.

"Thank you, Miss." She bowed her head and took a step back. Cray had not dismissed her and she knew better than to leave the room yet.

"Katniss is to be my wife. You are of course invited to the wedding. I expect all of my District 12 Peacekeepers to be there and after all, you are now among that rank."

"Katniss? As in Katniss Everdeen?" Her head shot up at his questioning tone and saw the surprise in his eyes.

"Not for long," Cray chuckled as he sipped at his tea. "You are dismissed, girl. Finish cleaning the kitchen."

"Yes sir." She practically ran from the room and retreated to the solitude of the kitchen. Who was that man? There had been recognition in his Merchant blue eyes.

She heard muffled voices, laughter, and then the sound of scooting chairs.

"Katniss! Come here, girl!" She wiped at her dirty face and attempted to make herself presentable before she appeared before him again. But both men were standing and Cray was clutching a large bag in his fist.

"You belong to Ryland now, girl. Don't you dare think about taking any of my things with you." Katniss's eyes fell to the dress she wore and bit her lip. The other man, Ryland, stepped forward and set a hand on her shoulder.

"Surely you wouldn't mind her keeping one dress, Commander?"

"You don't want her walking out of here naked?" he sneered. "I've seen her and I will tell you, she's quite a sight." For some reason, the young man looked immensely uncomfortable.

"I will pay extra for the dress." He dug in his pocket and tossed another coin to Cray.

"Fine. Get out of my sight, girl." Ryland wrapped his arm around her shoulder and lead her out of the room. They did not speak until they were far away from Cray's house. He was leading her to the other side of the district, where the peacekeepers lived.

"Sir-"

"Don't talk just yet, Katniss. I promise I will explain everything soon." She clamped her lips shut and followed him across the district.

He lead her inside a beautiful house, though not quite as grand as Cray's home. It was cozy, though, and she felt a strange warmth as soon as they entered.

He hastily unbuttoned the stiff jacket he wore and worked the buttons at his collar.

"Katniss, be a dear and help me out of this thing." Confused and terrified, she hurried forward and helped him shrug the jacket off. He sighed and rolled his shoulders.

"Thank you. That is immensely uncomfortable. I know there are formalities but sometimes they go a bit too far."

"Sir, I don't understand. Am I to be your wife now?"

"Not mine. I…ah, purchased you for my brother. I guarantee you he will be a better husband than Cray." Katniss had no doubt about that but what of this brother? Where was he? And why did this man save her?

"I don't understand," she said again, "Who is your brother?"

"Does it matter? You are free from Cray. Isn't that the matter of importance here?" She nodded slowly.

"Do you, um, have any other belongings? Or is that your only dress?" It was torn and quite revealing.

"Cray took me straight to his home after he bought me. I wasn't allowed to go home to fetch my things." His blue eyes widened.

"You mean you haven't been to see your family?" She wrapped her arms around herself and shook her head. All of a sudden, the tears spilled over and she sank to her knees. Ryland jumped back, alarmed.

"Umm, Katniss? Are you alright?"

"My family! They don't know what's happened to me! And my sister…my sister is dying! The only reason I agreed to this type of contract was to save her, to bring her medicine, and I haven't received any money! It will be too late! My sister will die!"

"Alright, calm down. Let's…let's take you home to get your things and check on your sister. We will order the medicine from the Capitol. If I put in the order, it will be rushed so it should arrive tomorrow. Would that make you feel better?"

"You…you'll let me see my family?" He sighed and pulled her to her feet.

"Of course. Katniss, As soon as I saw you, I knew I needed to get you away from him. The bruises on your cheeks tell me it wasn't a moment too soon." He reached out to push a strand of hair out of her eyes but she flinched, prepared for the sharp hand. He withdrew and looked saddened.

"What has he done to you?"

"You don't know me," she said quietly. "You don't know what I was like before he bought me."

"Well, you're wrong. I do, actually. But we won't go into that. Let's go see your family." She wanted to ask him, find out why he looked so familiar; he clearly knew her. The way he had said her name at Cray's house told her so. But she was too excited to go home to think about it any further. Ryland grabbed his formal jacket and started to button it up again. He opened the door and held out his arm.

"Shall we?" Taking a deep breath, she took his arm and he lead her out of the house and back toward the Seam.

* * *

Her mother was in tears when she saw her; Prim, however, was still stricken with fever and Katniss fell to her knees when she saw how weak her little sister looked. Ryland quickly spoke with Mrs. Everdeen about what medicines she needed and he promised to put in the order as soon as they returned home. Katniss could tell her mother wanted to ask what was going on but she kept silent in the presence of a high-ranking peacekeeper. The stripes on Ryland's jacket told them he was a man of importance and so nothing was said as Katniss quickly threw her things into a knapsack.

"You'll have more dresses and things to wear, more befitting of a peacekeeper's wife," he assured her as he offered his arm again.

"Please, sir, take care of my daughter," Mrs. Everdeen finally spoke, her eyes locked on his. Ryland's were gentle as he nodded.

"I assure you she is in good hands, ma'am. And she may come to visit you any time she wishes." Her mother squeezed her hand before she scooped up her bag and Ryland lead her away from her childhood home.


	5. Chapter 5

Katniss wondered about the way her mother kept looking at Ryland.

She saw the curtains part as they walked past; she was sure it would be the piece of gossip around the dinner tables tonight. Katniss Everdeen, the Seam trash, on the arm of a high-ranking official.

Ryland lead her back inside and shrugged out of his jacket again. He went to use the telephone to order the medicines from the Capitol, while Katniss stood uncertainly beside the table.

"Right, my brother should be home soon. You, um, might want to change out of that dress before he-" he stopped at the sound of heavy footsteps in the front hall.

"Ah, um Peet," he bit his lip and cast Katniss a worried look. "Why don't you come in here?"

"What are you doing in my house, Ryen? We just got back to 12 and already you're eating my food?" Rye chuckled and turned to greet his brother.

"Peet there's someone I'd like you to, um…meet." Katniss jumped to her feet and stood very still as another young man entered the room. She felt her knees buckle and she let out a little cry of surprise, her hands clapping over her mouth.

He was older, stronger, more broad-shouldered, and his blonde curls were trimmed shorter but his eyes, those alarmingly blue eyes filled with warmth and kindness, were still the same. And at the moment, they locked on her and widened like saucers. His lips parted in surprise and beneath his crisp formal jacket, his heart raced in its cage.

Her silver eyes widened as she lowered her hands from her mouth. Rye stood between them, looking anxious. Her voice rang out in the large kitchen.

"Peeta?"

* * *

The young man sucked in a sharp breath at the sound of his name being uttered by those luscious lips. Too long had he dreamed of such a thing. He didn't think she'd even remember his name. He didn't even think she'd remember him.

But she did. She stared at the shy boy, her boy with the bread, the person who had saved her life, who was thought to be dead. He wasn't dead; he was here, looking strong and healthy and beautiful. She wanted to run into his arms and hold him until the end of time.

But she couldn't move. Neither of them could. Peeta opened and closed his mouth several times, mouthing wordlessly but nothing came out.

"What's," he started off with a cracked voice and he cleared his throat. "What's going on here?" Ryen cleared his throat.

"Katniss, why don't you make a pot of tea while I talk to my brother?"

"You're…you're alive," she all but whispered. Peeta swallowed and Katniss's eyes filled with tears, though she never looked away from Peeta's face.

"Ryen Mellark…I should have recognized you." Ryen cleared his throat again and shifted uncomfortably.

"Peet, why don't we talk out in the hall? We'll only be a minute, Katniss."

She nodded, her eyes never leaving him as Ryen tugged him out of the room. Her hands shook as she made the tea, though for completely different reasons than this morning. Her mind and heart raced as she waited for the men to return. She needed answers. She needed to know why he was here, after being presumed dead for so long.

And she wondered, as she sipped at her tea, why her heart was racing so fast.

* * *

Peeta listened while Ryen hastily explained his afternoon. How Commander Cray had invited him over for tea earlier and had called a young woman into the room. How he'd discovered she was none other than his little brother's crush, Katniss Everdeen, and they were betrothed. How she looked beaten and defeated and he knew he had to get her away from him before they were wed. How Ryen had offered a great sum of money, greater even than what Cray had agreed to pay for her, so he could take her for a bride. How he had explained to Katniss that she would not marry him, but his brother instead. How he feared that Katniss was no longer the strong-willed, fiery young woman Peeta had known; now she was withdrawn and gun-shy, broken and beaten by the old peacekeeper. Peeta listened with fire in his eyes. If the old man weren't his commander, he would march to his house and slice his throat right now. Ryen could see the rage in his younger brother's eyes and he squeezed his shoulder.

"I had to get her out of there, Peeta. She's agreed to become a wife so you just need to sign the contract, and then she'll be yours."

"Why… would she do something like this," Peeta asked shakily.

"Her sister is close to death." Peeta squeezed his eyes shut. Primrose, that sweet little girl, and Katniss's greatest love. Of course she would do anything to save her. Including selling herself to the highest bidder. Peeta felt sick and lowered his head.

"I know this isn't really how you planned it, Peet, but... it will all work out."

Peeta shot a sharp look toward his brother, who merely shrugged halfheartedly.

" Look, that girl in there, whether she's who you remember or not…well, she needed to be saved. I'm not certain what all Cray has done to her but she's very submissive and you can tell she's been abused. I don't know if…I mean, obviously I didn't ask what he's…ah, made her do." Peeta's hands balled into fists again and his breathing grew heavy.

"Say something, Peet. I did this for you. I mean… if you really want me to, I'll take her back to Cray and-"

"No," Peeta said sharply. "No, she's not going back there. I'll keep her safe and I'll get the money for Primrose's medicine."

"I already ordered it a few moments ago. They said it would be on the first train to 12, in the morning. I told Katniss she's welcome to visit with her family any time she wishes. Cray kept her away from her family and she has very few belongings so you'll need to take her to the market."

"Thank you, Ryen. I can't…I don't know what to say."

"I may be a jackass, Peeta, but I'm still somewhat of a decent guy." Peeta managed a weak smile and his brother clapped him on the shoulder.

"What are we going to tell the rest of the district," Peeta sighed.

"At least Mom and Dad already know we're alive. I've heard some of the crazy rumors people made up when we disappeared. Can you believe the one that Mom killed us both?"

"Not too hard to believe," Peeta said through gritted teeth.

"Just wait until she sees you now. A high-ranking Peacekeeper. You're not the little boy she used to hit anymore. We'll slip back into normal society slowly but I imagine people will talk no matter what we do. And so what if they do? We'll be with the people who matter to us." Peeta nodded faintly; he knew their return to 12 wouldn't be a simple one but he expected he might have some more time before he saw her again. He'd hoped he would have a story for her, an excuse for his absence, and a reason why he was coming to court her. He wanted the chance to love her and care for her…now that he was no longer the useless little baker he once was.

"She's the reason we came back here. So, should we go talk to your bride-to-be?" Peeta inhaled sharply and Ryen chuckled as he pushed Peeta back into the kitchen. Katniss was pouring a cup of tea, and Peeta noticed her hands were shaking. Ryen scooped up his jacket and cleared his throat.

"None for me, Katniss. I need to go speak to Mr. Undersee about planning my toasting."

"Wait a moment…you? You're the one who asked for Madge's hand," she asked quietly.

"I've had a thing for her since I was a boy. Mr. Undersee didn't seem to mind when he found out my rank but I imagine Madge will be pissed as hell that no one told her it was me."

"Understatement," she muttered and Ryen laughed. "You both…I mean, you were dead…you're both alive!"

"I'm sure Peet will fill you in. You two have a good night. Katniss, always a pleasure." He patted his brother's shoulder on his way out. Katniss and Peeta stood where they were, their gazes locked together. Katniss looked so lost but her gaze fell to the cup in her hand.

"Um…do you take sugar in your tea?" Peeta shook his head and Katniss passed him his cup. He took it with a nod but continued to stand. His eyes traveled over her slender frame, lingering on the torn dress and the fresh bruises around her eye. He gripped the teacup so tightly he feared he might break it.

"You must be exhausted," he said softly, setting the cup down. Her head jerked up and her eyes widened. "I know you must have so many questions but we can talk in the morning. Would you like me to show you where you'll be sleeping?"

"Yes please." He nodded and gestured for her to follow him. He walked through the house stiffly, giving her the tour of the house before stopping in the doorway of the bedroom. She carried her bag into the room and set it on the floor.

"I'm afraid I've only been given one bed but if you give me a few days, I'm sure I can order another one from the Capitol. I can sleep on the couch tonight." She turned back to him, her brow furrowed in confusion.

"You…you don't want me to share your bed?" He closed his eyes for a moment, forcing himself to stay calm.

"Katniss, you will not be my servant nor my…I will not use you in that way," he said uncomfortably.

"This is to be your house too and I want you to be comfortable. Whatever you wish, all you need to do is ask." She lowered her head and he wished he could see her face.

"Ryen says you brought some things from your home. We can go tomorrow to buy more of whatever you need."

"That's alright, Officer Mellark. I don't need anything." He cleared his throat and she looked back up at him.

"Please dispense with the formalities, Katniss. We've known each other since we were children. I'm still just Peeta."

"You don't have to buy me things, Peeta," she said softly. His heart fluttered at the sound of his name again.

"The wife of a peacekeeper shall have whatever she desires," he said firmly. "I know you don't really want this. But I'll do whatever I can to help you and to protect you." His words lingered in the air and they both stared at the floor. They were both thinking of that fateful afternoon, with blurred tears and burned bread. He cleared his throat, making her jump.

"I expect you'll want to retire. Sleep well, Katniss." He turned toward the couch and Katniss crossed into the bedroom to use the grand bathroom. Peeta sighed, realizing that Katniss Everdeen would be sleeping in his bed. If that wasn't a childhood fantasy come true…

"Peeta?" He turned to find her clinging to the doorframe, looking scared and anxious. Her nightshirt was threadbare and barely reached her knees.

"Would you…I mean…I know I don't have the right to ask this…"

"What?"

"Would you…stay with me?" His eyes widened and he swore he hadn't heard her correctly. She bit her lip, seeing the horror in his eyes and she cleared her throat.

"I'm sorry I asked, I'll be fine-" she fell silent as he came near, stopping in front of her.

"Katniss." She stared at the floor until he reached out to cup her chin. She flinched when she saw his hand come near and he lowered it to his side. He was heartbroken to see how right Rye was; she positively trembled when someone got too close to her.

"Katniss, look at me." Slowly she raised her eyes to his and he lifted a hand, almost like he was placating a startled animal. His lips a thin line, his eyes held her gaze and he couldn't help but push a stray hair behind her ear. He bit his lip when she closed her eyes and turned into his palm.

"You want me to stay with you?"

"Yes," she said softly. He nodded and followed her over to the bed.

"I can sleep on the floor if you prefer."

"This bed is huge, Peeta. And I won't bite." She climbed under the covers and looked up at him. He stood beside the bed, shifting nervously.

"Do you always sleep in that thing?"

"Oh," he quickly glanced down and shook his head. "I'll just change really quickly. I'll be right back." She settled into the blankets and puzzled while she waited for him to return. He certainly looked like the boy with the bread…but he didn't act like it. He was formal and almost…well, cold. His voice was deeper, his speech more articulate than anyone she'd heard in District 12. He hardly smiled; Katniss remembered the baker's son always had a smile on his face.

But his eyes. His eyes were the same.

* * *

When he returned, she was fast asleep. Smiling, he pushed his window open a little and climbed in next to her. He attempted to give her some space and he remained on his back, still, until he felt her small form cuddling up to him and her head found a place on his chest. He closed his eyes at her contented sigh and allowed his hand to fall to her hair, his fingers tangling in the dark threads. His heart beat rapidly for this girl that he loved so fiercely. No matter the reason why she was here with him, he vowed to keep her safe and provide for her. She needn't love him in return; he wouldn't ask for that. He would be a dutiful husband to his silver-eyed girl, while keeping his fragile heart guarded.


	6. Chapter 6

Whether it was his baker hours or early morning training, Peeta still woke up before the sun did. He glanced sideways and smiled when he saw Katniss sleeping peacefully. Gently disentangling himself from her arms, he started to lean down to kiss her forehead before he stopped himself. This is a contract, Peeta. She'll never really be yours. Distance yourself and harden your heart. Don't let yourself get hurt.

Sighing, he pulled away and quickly dressed to go running. The training centers in 2 had a gymnasium and lots of machines to help the men stay in shape. 12 had nothing of the sort but Peeta wouldn't let that stop him. He quickly finished making breakfast and decided to leave it for her on the counter. He scrawled a hasty note, grabbed his bottle of water, and ran out the door.

* * *

When he entered his house, he sighed and tugged at his shirt. It was drenched from sweat and he reached up to wipe his face. He had run through the meadow to the fence and back, and then had done a hundred pushups in his yard before coming back inside.

He froze when he saw her small frame sitting at the counter, munching on the breakfast he had made. Her eyes widened when she saw him and she dropped the cheesebun to the counter, standing up immediately. She didn't wear a dress, as most women in 12 did, but brown pants and a cream- colored tank top.

"I'm…I'm sorry…your note…I thought they were for me…I mean, that I could have one…I'm sorry if I ate your breakfast. Please let me bake you some more." She almost scoffed at herself; she definitely couldn't bake. But she was afraid of upsetting a Peacekeeper. I mean, what's the punishment for stealing their breakfast, she thought.

He shook his head and crossed to the sink. Katniss watched in wonder as he refilled his water bottle without having to bring in water from another source. Just like Cray's house, there were many luxuries she wasn't used to.

"Katniss don't be ridiculous. I did make them for you. I thought you would like them and I'm glad to see you enjoying them."

"You…made these for me?" He took a long gulp of water and her eyes followed the drop of sweat that dripped down his neck past the collar of his transparent shirt. She mentally chastised herself and her eyes snapped back up to his face.

"When we were fourteen, I tried to make cheesebuns by myself and I was so proud that they were a success. I snuck a few into your locker at school and wanted to dance when I saw how you nearly devoured them all. Of course you saved one for Prim but I knew when I saw you eat the others that they were your favorite." Katniss started to choke on the cheesebun and Peeta passed her a glass of water. After a few gulps, she shook her head.

"What do you mean, you snuck them into my locker?" He said nothing but his gaze held hers and her eyes widened.

"It was you. All those years…it was you! Why didn't I realize that?"

''I didn't really think it would take you too long to figure it out," he said with a slight smirk. "I was the only baker in your class after all." She dropped the cheesebun and wiped her hands clean.

"You could have gotten into such trouble." He merely shrugged and took another swig from his bottle.

"I thought we could go to the Market later to get you some new clothes. I also thought you would like to design your bedroom. I can get things from the Capitol too, if you prefer."

"My own…bedroom?"

"I told you last night that I don't expect you to sleep in my bed. You entered this contract to save your sister and that's exactly what you'll do. You needn't do anything for me save for one thing." She watched him warily and he set the bottle down.

"I would like it very much if we could be friends. The extra bedroom is large and should be comfortable enough for you. We can eat our meals together and you can tell me what you like. I'll try to make life for you here as pleasant as possible."

"Peeta-" she started but he didn't let her continue.

"Five years is the standard marriage contract for a peaceekeeper but we have the option of keeping it open-ended so that you can decide if you want to extend it at the end of five years. Nothing more is required and I'll keep you supplied with a steady allowance but you just tell me if you ever need anything else. I'd be happy to give you an allowance for Prim and your mother as well. I have money that I don't need."

"But Peeta, I-"

"I have to go over to Cray to get your contract and then I'll need to go to the Justice Building to have the name corrected. You're welcome to plan the toasting yourself, I mean, the wedding, I really don't mind."

"Peeta I don't want-"

"Or we could just stick with a standard contract with no marriage," he said quickly, sensing her alarm. "As I said, I'd like us to be friends. Nothing more. You don't have to marry me. And of course nothing else is required. You wouldn't need to-"

"Peeta will you shut up for one second!" His mouth clamped shut and he stared at her in awe and surprise. She looked angry but at her own outburst, she clapped a hand to her mouth and shook her head. Speaking like that to a Peacekeeper could get her into trouble. She chewed on her bottom lip.

"I'm…I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to disrespect you. You just…everything you're saying is making my head spin. I just need a moment." He nodded slowly.

"You're right. I'm sorry. This is a lot to take in. I need to wash up and then go over to Commander Cray's house. Why don't you rest and I'll be back in a little while?"

"Sir…Peeta…we really need to talk." He cupped her chin gently and she stifled her natural reaction to tear away.

"And we will. I'll be back later and we can eat lunch. I'll answer whatever questions you have. In the meantime, you can get rid of 'sir' too. I dislike it almost as much as 'Officer'."

He started to lean in and she found herself leaning toward him. She wanted him to kiss her, she realized. If even on the forehead. She had seen her father do it to her mother countless times and it always looked so sweet. She didn't know why she was craving such meaningless gestures. This was just a business contract, after all. And Peeta would never see her as anything more than a friend. He had said so himself. So she leaned back in her chair and nodded while he passed by her to go to his bathroom. She picked up another cheesebun and savored the rich flavors. She didn't know how to feel, to know that he had snuck her food in the past. She hadn't even thanked him for the bread yet. Now she owed him for more? Sighing, she chewed her food quietly before washing it down with the water. When she finished, she washed the dishes in the sink (marveling that she didn't have to wash them in a pot) and she looked around the kitchen. It was neat and tidy, unlike Cray's. There wasn't a lot of cleaning for her to do. She would have to ask Peeta when he got out of the shower what he expected from her. If there was any housework to be done, or if she needed to knit or sew. Not that she knew how to do either of those things but she was sure Prim could teach her.

She gasped; Prim! Would the medicine make it to 12 today?

The door opened and Peeta walked out, toweling his damp hair. He was dressed in crisp black pants and a blue shirt. She was relieved he wasn't wearing his peacekeeper uniform. She agreed with Madge; they looked like robots and she couldn't imagine Peeta like that.

"Peeta, could I maybe go see my sister today?" He threw the towel in the corner and frowned.

"You don't need my permission to do what you want, Katniss. You can go see your family whenever you want. I would never stop you from visiting them."

"Ryen said the medicine should be here today. I could go wait for it?"

"I'll accompany you to the train station later. Since a Mellark made the order, a Mellark should pick it up. And it won't be in until this afternoon." She nodded and glanced at her worn pants and bit her lip.

"I thought I could go with you…I mean, if you don't mind. Is this alright to wear to the Justice Building?"

"We're just filling out some paperwork. There's no call to impress. Are you ready then?" She nodded and he tucked a few papers into his back pocket.

"Wait!" She ran back into the bedroom for something, then returned quickly, stuffing something into her back pocket. When he opened the door, he offered her his arm, just as Ryen had. She took it with no hesitation and ignored the stares that met them as they walked through town. Did Mr. and Mrs. Mellark know their sons were back? Katniss became frightened of the gossip that would be circulating later. Peeta looked straight ahead as they walked and Katniss found herself missing the smile that made his lips curve upward and his whole face light up.

They stopped in front of Cray's house and Peeta took Katniss's hand.

"I think it would be better for you to wait for me out here." She squeezed his hand gratefully. She had no desire to ever set foot inside that house again. She walked around the side of the house and leaned against it as Peeta knocked on the door.

"Well, Officer Mellark. What can I do for you?"

"Sir, I have a certain order of business that needs attending to regarding a transaction between you and my brother."

"Ah, I assume you're referring to that sweet piece of ass I let walk out of my home yesterday?"

"Commander, Ryen made the purchase for me and I just need the copy of Miss Everdeen's contract so I can make the proper corrections."

"Ah so you're the lucky recipient. Wait right here, let me find the damned paper." Katniss peered around the corner to see Peeta waiting in the doorway, his face flushed red. She heard Cray's heavy footsteps and slipped back out of view.

"Stupid wench didn't understand what she was signing, it seems. You can see you have all legal rights. Unfortunately I didn't exercise my rights because as she kept reminding me, I wasn't her legal husband yet. So I guess you're lucky. She claims she's untouched but you know her type, boy, I'm sure she's been to the slag heap a time or two." Katniss's jaw dropped and her face reddened. Would Peeta believe him that she wasn't a virgin? Then she heard something that made her heart drop.

"Seam sluts are all the same, aren't they sir?" Cray chuckled and clapped Peeta's shoulder.

"You've got that right. But she's hardworking and has a strong build. She's got a pretty mouth on her too, so mind you put that to use." Cray shot him a wink and Peeta felt his hands ball into fists.

"Of course, sir," he replied. "I certainly intend to."

"I've already taught her a few things that I'm sure you'll enjoy," Katniss's face burned. "I look forward to attending the wedding."

"We'll be glad to have you there."

"Don't forget to report to the barracks for a meeting at seventeen hundred hours tonight."

"Yes sir, of course."

"I'm sure it will be hard to tear yourself away from your new fuck toy but don't be late, Mellark." Both men nodded and the door slammed shut.

"Son of a bitch," Peeta spat under his breath. He glanced down at the paper in his hand and gripped it tightly in his fist. Sighing, he turned away and made his way down the stairs. He frowned when he did not see Katniss waiting for him.

"Katniss?" He took a few steps and his head swiveled around.

"Katniss!" He turned on the spot and lifted his hand to his hair. Could something have happened to her? Could someone have taken her while he was distracted? Could she have run away, wanting to be as far away from him as possible?

He released a little groan and looked around. His eyes narrowed as he saw a slender figure in the distance, leaning against a large apple tree. He sucked in a breath as he realized it was the bakery, his childhood home. As he approached, he saw Katniss sitting against the tree, her knees tucked into her chest. She looked much the same as she had that horrible day. He cast the bakery a quick look before he knelt in front of her.

"Katniss?" His voice was gentle and kind but she didn't want to look up.

"Katniss, what's wrong?" She shrugged off his touch but still didn't look up.

"Talk to me. Please," he said urgently. Her head shot up and he was startled to see tears streaming down her cheeks. But her eyes flashed and she looked furious. She struggled to her feet and shook him off when he tried to help her.

"Well?"

"Um…well," he said, taken aback by her bizarre behavior.

"The slag heap is just over that hill, Peeta, if you want to take me there."

"What?" His eyes widened and he took a step backwards.

"Stupid me, you're a peacekeeper now. Why would you frequent the slag heap when you have a warm bed all to yourself? So take me to your home then. Take the Seam slut home." Horror etched in his face as he started to understand why she was acting this way.

"Katniss-"

"My word is obviously not good enough so take me home and make me yours! It'll prove to you that I'm a virgin!" He reached out for her but she stamped her foot and jumped back.

"Or no you don't want that, do you? You said you wouldn't use me that way. You'll just use my mouth to make you feel good? You want me to get down on my knees for you right here? You don't want to "use" me but you'll teach me things, like Cray did-"

"Stop it," he hissed, gripping her arms tightly. She gasped at his rough touch and his face was inches from hers.

"If Cray heard you talking like this to a peacekeeper, he'd have you whipped. So watch. Your. Tongue." She fell silent but kept her chin lifted defiantly. He glanced down to where he was gripping her arms and immediately released her. She gingerly rubbed at her arm and he sighed.

"I can't believe you would actually think…me, of all people…" he trailed off and she glanced up to see his head dropped down on his chest.

"I can't believe you would think so little of me," he muttered under his breath.

"I heard what you said," she said, somewhat defensively. His eyes slammed shut and he turned away.

"Did it ever cross your mind that I was playing a part? To keep us both safe? Did it ever occur to you that being back in 12 is strange for me? That this isn't how I imagined us meeting again? Did it even occur to you that maybe I don't want a wife? No one really asked me if I wanted to marry you!" She inhaled quickly, wrapping her arms around herself to lessen the sting.

But her heart hurt. She stared at the boy she once knew, the boy she might have loved, and realized that she could do so much worse. He had been the one who kept her alive and now he was doing it again. He said himself he didn't expect anything from her, so why couldn't she keep her mouth shut?

Her hands dropped to her sides and she chewed on her lip.

"I'm…I'm sorry, Peeta," when he didn't react or turn back to her, she sighed. "I know you didn't ask for this. So just tear up my contract and I'll go back home. I'll pay you and Ryen back when I can."

"Ryen paid twice as much as Cray's original purchase for you. How do you think you'll pay him back?" She stiffened and stood up straight.

"I'll find a way. I don't let debts go unpaid." Except one. She hadn't even thanked him, she reminded herself angrily. " I'll see myself home. Officer." She winced as she turned and started to walk away.

"Katniss," he called and she immediately stopped in her tracks. "I remember about the bread." She turned slowly to find him standing beside the tree. His hand was pressed against the bark and his face was lifted, though his eyes were closed.

"I was…supposed to make sure the bread didn't burn," he stammered. "And I was watching my father decorate a cake. I always loved to watch him decorate. Mom was out front with my brothers and it was just Dad and I…I loved those moments. Whenever Mom was around, she'd constantly remind me how useless I was. How I was good for nothing. More often than not, her harsh words were accompanied by a sharp slap." Katniss's eyes widened as she stared at him; he seemed lost in his memories.

"I heard her yelling and then I ran to the window. And I saw you. You were crying against this tree and you looked so…god, you were so close to death. I'd seen you at school. You always tried to hide it but you didn't eat at lunch and your clothes were always too big. You gave whatever you had to your sister. You put on a brave face and pretended to be fine but I knew you weren't. And when I saw you in our yard…I knew I had to do something. So I knocked the bread into the fire and Mom saw. She hit me with her rolling pin and told me to feed it to the pigs. I didn't though. I threw it to you and watched you run home with it," he paused to swallow a few times and Katniss blinked back tears, the memories flooding through her.

"The next day at school, I…I wanted to talk to you but couldn't. Mom had hit me a few more times the night before and there were bruises on my face…I just watched you. I watched you pick a dandelion and then you ran off to get your sister. I watched you after that and was glad when things got better. You started to trade with my dad and I watched you walking to the fence. You got better and I was...I was so happy." His head jerked up when he noticed she was standing right in front of him.

"And then you painted this?" She reached into her back pocket and withdrew the painting of the dandelion. His eyes widened as he took it from her and he looked back up at her.

"Where…how did you get this?"

"Your dad gave it to me on my birthday. He said…you would have wanted me to have it. My name is on the front," she pointed out needlessly. He nodded, his eyes traveling over the piece of art.

"I made this for you that day I saw you pluck the dandelion. I wanted to put it in your locker but I was too scared." She placed her hand over his and he swallowed.

"I should have gone to you. I should have gone out into the rain and handed you that bread. I should have done more."

"You couldn't have," she tried to soothe him. "Your mother hit you for burning bread. What would she have done if she had seen you talking to me? Helping me?"

"I don't care," he growled. "I should have done everything I could to keep you alive. Instead I threw you a couple of measly loaves of bread."

"Those measly loaves of bread saved our lives," she said, taking his hand in hers. "I ran home and took it to Prim and we ate for the first time in days. At school, I wanted to talk to you…I wanted to thank you but I saw the bruises and knew it was my fault. So I was too much of a coward. But I saw the dandelions and remembered my father telling me about edible plants. So I ran to get Prim and we collected all the dandelions we could. We ate better than we had in months. Mom came back to us and cooked for us. I hunted and traded with your father and things did get better. Thanks to you."

"I didn't do anything, Katniss," he said in a pained voice.

"You saved my life," she whispered, leaning up to kiss his cheek. He gasped at the feel of her lips on his skin and she drew back, her eyes searching his. She leaned back in and kissed his other cheek, his jaw line, his nose, and his eyelids. Every spot that had been marred by his mother. Her soft 'thank you's painted his skin and Peeta let out a tiny moan. He tilted his head, so Katniss rested her palm on his cheek.

"Why did you disappear," she said softly. "What happened to you?" Peeta opened his mouth to speak but shut it and looked around.

"Not here," he shook his head. "Let's go home and we can talk."

"Weren't we supposed to go to the Justice Building first?"

"I think answering your questions is more important right now." He held out his hand and she stared at it for a moment; his look of hurt vanished as soon as she slid her hand into his and he lead her back home.


	7. Chapter 7

.

Peeta tried to make the tea but Katniss insisted, making him sit down at the table. He muttered his thanks when she set the mug in front of him and sat across from him. For the next several hours, he told her in a quiet voice, all that had happened three years ago.

Peacekeepers had come to the bakery in the middle of the night and told his father that they were taking Ryen and Peeta away. His father tried to intervene but the peacekeepers burst into the apartment. The older brother had tried to fight them off but they beat him and found Peeta hiding. They covered the boys' eyes and pushed them into the back of a truck that rumbled out of 12 in the dead of night.

Peeta and Ryen were the best wrestlers in the district and apparently had been noticed by the officials. It was decided the two District 12 boys would make fine peacekeepers and they were taken to 2 to train.

Training was intense and it took awhile for the rest of the men to warm up to them. After all, no one could imagine why boys from an outlying district like 12 were there in the first place.

Peeta's first fight, however, showed them exactly why they were there. Peeta had always been the calm one of the family; he hated violence and he was more of a mediator between his older brothers. He was gentle and kind and always smiled.

But when one of the men he shared a bunk with stole his sketchpad and taunted him about his "trash girlfriend", he snapped. He'd dragged the man outside and had taken swings. The others had run outside and Ryen had leaped in to help his brother. Peeta didn't need help, however. The others cowered away from the two and the man immediately apologized.

Peeta laughed as he told Katniss that the man, Carl, were now very good friends. Carl had stayed behind in 2, however, because he was getting married. And as a native of 2, he had the choice of staying there or going elsewhere.

After the fight, Peeta and Ryen both devoted themselves to training. They became the fine soldiers they were predicted to be and they quickly climbed up the ranks. Their names were changed to Ryland and Peter because their old names "sounded too District 12", he told her with a grumble.

He never forgot about his life in 12 nor the girl he had left behind. He had heard someone mention the higher the rank you were, the more they were likely to let you choose where to be stationed. It was his chance to go back and watch over her. He confided to Ryen that he needed to be stationed in 12 and Ryen immediately knew why. They agreed to move back together and not long after, the commander had called them both into his barracks.

Peeta bowed his head and told his commander he wished to return to his home district and Ryen said he would like to join his brother. The commander was actually slightly sorry to see the District 12 boys go; they were some of his best soldiers and knew he needed the best to defend the Capitol against whatever rebellious activity was brewing. But, he was a man of his word and he had told the men they could choose where they wanted to be stationed. Many of them chose to return to their home districts. Most of them were already from 2 and chose to stay there. A group of Peeta's and Ryen's friends chose to move to 12. Before they shipped out, a friend revealed a new trending ploy in District 12; women were entering marriage contracts with peacekeepers for a bit of stability and wealth. Ryen had clapped Peeta's shoulder and laughed.

"You can walk right up to Katniss Everdeen and ask her to marry you now. You're a peacekeeper, baby bro, she knows you can keep her safe."

And that's what Peeta had planned to do. His first day back in the district, he had gone to the Justice Building to find out what he needed to do to marry. He wanted to go talk to Katniss first but as a peacekeeper, he did have to follow certain protocol. He'd been outraged as they explained to him that he would first purchase the bride, and would sign a contract agreeing to pay her a stipend. He was disgusted that it had come to that and he hoped against hope that he could convince Katniss that he didn't think of her as property. He obtained the correct documents and was then asked if he had a woman in mind. He blushed and shook his head and the official told him to go to the auction block to see if he fancied any of them. Revolted, Peeta had made his way home, only to find the very woman he intended to ask, waiting in his kitchen.

. Ryen had told him that he had to barter with Cray to get Katniss away from him; at first Ryen was afraid the old peacekeeper wouldn't give in but Ryen raised his price more than Cray expected. A Peacekeeper from 2, after all, was considerably more wealthy than a peacekeeper in 12. It didn't matter the rank; Ryen's wealth still outshone Cray's. Cray had caved when he saw the bag of money and told Ryen to take her away. Ryen was sure Katniss had not recognized him but he knew her mother had. He'd wanted to tell her about Peeta, but Katniss had recognized him immediately.

When he finished, they both sat in silence for what seemed like years. To have something to do, Peeta took a sip of his tea and winced when the cold touched his lips.

"You…you wanted to marry me," she asked in a timid voice. She didn't ask about his sketch pad…and who his "girlfriend" was, though she had an idea. He set the mug down and fidgeted with his hands.

"Ever since I was a little boy."

"But you didn't know me then…or know me now."

"Katniss I loved you the moment I heard you sing." Her brow furrowed.

"I don't sing in public."

"You don't remember? In music assembly, the teacher asked who knew the Valley Song and your hand shot right up in the air. She put you up on a stool and had you sing it for us. I was mesmerized. I told my Dad that afternoon when he picked me up, I said, I met the prettiest girl and I was going to marry her one day."

Katniss stared at her hands splayed on the table.

"We were five. You had a plaid dress and your hair…it was in two braids instead of one," he mumbled more to the table than to her.

"Katniss." She looked up to see him reaching into his pocket and withdrawing several pieces of paper. He unfolded one and set it on the table.

"I have loved you for years. It was thoughts of you that got me through training. When the days got tough, I just thought of your silver eyes or your long dark hair and I would be ok. Yes, I want to marry you. I want to care for you and provide for you and bake for you. I want to see you smile and not have so many worries. I want to meet your mother and Prim. And I want you to think of me as a friend. Not someone who…who signed a contract with you. But someone who genuinely cares for you. Who will always protect you." He took a pen out of his pocket and his hand hovered over the paper.

Katniss's eyes were trained on the line with her signature.

"I want you to understand, though, I don't want you to feel obligated to stay with me. I told you everything because you deserve the truth. I don't expect you to love me back. And I don't expect you to marry me, if you don't want to. The contract is active for five years, with or without a marriage. You'll get more benefits as my wife, rather than my mistress but I'm providing you money to help your family and in turn, you'll be my friend. That's all. I will never, ever, ask for anything other than friendship. Your body belongs to no one but you, alright?" She nodded, reaching back to bring her braid around so she could play with it.

"I have a little bit of money I can give to you…and you can just go home. I can tear this up and you won't ever have to see me again, if you don't want. But if we do this…I can help you feed your family everyday. You won't have to worry about putting food on the table. I'll provide for all of you." If it had been anyone else saying these things, she would have stalked off, she would have stalked off, angry. She didn't take kindly to charity or someone telling her they could provide for her. But Peeta had been saving her since they were kids. She knew all he wanted was to help. He never asked for anything in return. And Prim had grown much too skinny.

"So, shall I sign it?" Her eyes flickered between the paper and his soft eyes softer even with the light of the sun streaming into the kitchen. Slowly she nodded and he put the pen to paper. He quickly scrawled his signature next to hers and set the pen down.

"That was just the contract though, right?"

"Yes but I have some more papers." He unfolded another and laid it on top of the contract. Katniss's eyes widened.

Marriage Contract.

Peeta was watching her intently and she gripped her braid.

"We don't have to do this," he said softly. "We don't have to actually marry if-" he stopped as she picked up a pen and scribbled her signature next to the line that said WIFE.

"Are you sure?" She looked to his eyes boring into hers. Was she sure that Peeta Mellark was the only man she would ever consider marrying? After everything he had said, she knew it was her boy with the bread. He was still just as gentle and kind…

She nodded and handed him the pen. He blinked, his long lashes resting on his cheek, before he filled in the line of HUSBAND.

"We need to take these to the Justice Building," he said, as he folded the papers back up.

"They'll want to witness us signing another copy. And then we can go get Prim's medicine and take it to her." She nodded and stood up as he did.

"Peeta," she reached out to take his hand and he stopped. "I…thank you." He gave her a small smile and hurried into his bedroom. When he came out, he was dressed in his formal jacket again. He looked uncomfortable as he was buttoning up the stiff collar.

"Would you mind changing into a dress? Just for appearances. We can get back into our comfortable clothes when we get home."

"I don't really have any nice dresses," she said softly.

"As long as it's not the one you were wearing yesterday, it will be fine."

"I burned it," she said quickly and his eyes softened.

"Good. Just put one on and we will stop by the Market first."

"You don't have to wear that big white uniform all the Peacekeepers wear?"

"Only when I'm on duty. And I've been given a few days to get my affairs in order."

Katniss went to her bag and pulled out her nicest dress. It was a faded blue but it accentuated her curves well. She pulled it on and groaned when she saw how short it had become. It was her Reaping dress, after all. Thinking she had better change, she rifled through her bag for something else to wear when Peeta poked his head in.

"You look beautiful." She looked down at herself and frowned.

"Really? In this thing?"

"The color suits you. You ready to go?" She shrugged and tossed her bag aside.

"I should…probably do something with my hair."

"Why? I like it like this," he reached out to stroke her braid and she shivered.

"Um. Ok." She took his arm and he lead her from the house.

* * *

The stop at the Market was awkward at best. Katniss was a frequent visitor of the Hob but that was the black market. She didn't feel comfortable with these hoity-toity Merchants, who were treating her like a queen even though several days ago they were spitting at her from their windows.

"I need a dress for my betrothed," Peeta said unsmilingly. "Something nice but not too fancy."

"Oh sir, I have just the thing," one of the ladies simpered. Katniss wrinkled her nose when a hideous yellow and green dress was brought out. The next two were equally as horrible. Katniss knew she shouldn't be picky but she didn't want anything fancy.

"Perhaps if you tell me what your betrothed is looking for," the woman said irritably. Peeta could see how uneasy Katniss was and asked for a moment alone.

"Hey," he squeezed her hand. "You ok?"

"I just…never come here."

"Where do you shop?"

"The Hob." Peeta shook his head.

"I'm a high-ranking official, Katniss. I can't be seen at a black market on my first day in town. You understand, right?"

"Of course." Stupid. She hadn't thought of that and Peeta looked apologetic.

"If you really hate everything here, I can order something from the Capitol."

"No," she said quickly. She wouldn't wear anything from the Capitol. "No, it's fine. I'm sorry, I'm being picky. Just tell her to bring out something plain. These are too..." Capitol, she wanted to say but she trailed off. Peeta seemed to understand anyway.

He asked, charmingly, if they had anything "less formal" and a simple red dress was brought out. It came past her knees, the waist was tapered and the sleeves were a little worn but other than that, it looked very nice. Katniss excused herself to try it on and she had to admit she liked how the fabric felt. Peeta was pacing and stopped when she opened the tent; his eyes widened as they raked over her form.

"Do you like this one?"

"Yes."

"Good. So do I. We will take this one, Madame." They allowed her to wear it out and Peeta kept her blue one folded it over his arm. She clutched his other arm as he lead her to the Justice Building and she started when several people bowed low to them. She hadn't really understood the rank of a Peacekeeper except that they were pretty important. But she felt like she was traveling with a Hunger Games Victor.

"Good afternoon, Lieutenant Mellark." Katniss froze; Lieutenant?! Peeta was no mere Peacekeeper. He had said he was high-ranking but didn't say just how high-ranking he was!

He glanced sideways at her and nodded to the woman at the desk.

"Good afternoon. My fiancé and I are here for a marriage license."

"Have you the proper forms?" Peeta handed over the papers they had already signed and she nodded.

"This is the woman you bought?"

"I asked her to marry me," he said through gritted teeth. "She isn't a piece of property."

The woman looked surprised and she nodded.

"Wait while I ask the Mayor if he needs anything else." Peeta's fingers tapped against his side as they waited. He sighed as he glanced sideways at her.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to lose my temper. I just...I really hate the way this has worked out. Women aren't to be bought and sold. It's disgusting."

"It is," she agreed. "Darius was the one who encouraged me to sign. He said that most of the men were just looking for love. I'd like to kick him in the shins."

"Well, that's true. I know the men from 2, and they're good guys. Still, I think there are other ways to confess your love. Or propose, that don't involve signing a contract and paying for a wife. I suppose I can't talk though. I feel as despicable as the Capitol."

"Peeta," she turned to him immediately, placing her hand over his. "You saved me from Cray. You're nothing like that. You don't look at me like your property, nor have you forced me into anything. So don't you dare feel guilty, ok?" He squeezed her hand and smiled but it didn't reach his

"Wait a moment. She called you Lieutenant. Lieutenant?!" He turned toward her and shrugged. It was just starting to hit her. "You didn't tell me you were Lieutenant!"

"You didn't ask," he said delicately.

"Peeta-"

"Katniss my rank doesn't change anything. I just have more luxuries and a bit more freedom. That's it. I'm still just Peeta. Ok?" She nodded faintly, her head still spinning. The woman returned with a fresh form.

"The Mayor just asks that you sign them right here and I'll sign as a witness." Peeta nodded and quickly signed before handing the pen to Katniss. She faltered a few times but finally scrawled out her name. The woman clapped her hands together before she signed and whisked the paper away.

"Excellent. Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Mellark! You're all set." Katniss felt like she would keel over at any minute.

Mrs. Mellark.

She was Katniss Mellark now.

Peeta slipped his hand into hers and squeezed. It was meant to be a comforting gesture but it just reminded her that her life was tied to his now. And no matter what he said about not expecting anything from her, she still owed him for the bread. For saving her life.

"Thank you, Madame," he said cheerfully as he turned them away and headed out of the building.

"Right, that's taken care of. Now let's head to the train station to get Prim's medicine."

She tucked her arm under his and grasped his bicep as they walked through town. Many people nodded to Peeta in acknowledgement. Others just stared. He had, after all, been presumed dead for over three years.

Seeing him alive and healthy would probably be jarring for many people.

"Peeta," she said softly, her face lowered. "Have you seen your parents since you've returned?"

"Ryen sent word that we would be home soon but we haven't actually seen them yet. I was planning to go to the bakery after my meeting tonight. Perhaps I can bring you something sweet to enjoy later?"

"Oh you don't have to do that."

"I know I don't have to," he said, cupping her chin. "But I want to."

"Ok. Stuff me with cakes and cookies. I won't complain." Peeta chuckled and turned her to face him. He didn't care that they were stopping in the middle of town and everyone's eyes were locked on them. His fingers caressed her cheek and his eyes positively sparkled. Katniss felt weak as her eyes met his and his lips curved into a smile.

But just as suddenly as the smile had appeared, it fell away and he cleared his throat. He laid his other hand over hers and briskly pulled her off. Her head was spinning; why the abruptness and the cold look on his face?

People were whispering as they approached the train station and Peeta shot them irritated glares. He nodded to the man at the station and quietly introduced himself.

"Train just came in. Your parcel is being held up the street there." Peeta paled as he saw what the man was pointing at.

"Wait. At the bakery?"

"It did say Mellark," the man said slowly. "We didn't have a first name. And we didn't know that you were alive."

"Alright, alright," Peeta snapped, so unlike himself. "I'll fetch it from the bakery. But I want any future parcels for Lieutenant P. Mellark to be sent over to the peacekeeper row, right near Victor's Village. Understand?"

"Yes sir," the man said, his demeanor changing immediately. Peeta merely rolled his eyes and grabbed Katniss's hand.

"Come on, Katniss." She hurried to keep up with him and glanced up to see his handsome face was screwed up in anger.

"Peeta, can we slow down? You're…you're kind of hurting me." He was gripping her hand tightly and he immediately released her, his expression turning into one of horror.

"I'm so sorry. Katniss, I didn't even realize-"

"It's fine," she said quickly.

"I'm ok."

"Listen," he breathed, running a hand through his coiffed hair. "I think it would be better if I go to the bakery alone. I'll meet you at your mother's house, if that's alright?" Katniss looked startled but he took her hands and pulled them to his lips.

"It's nothing against you," he said hastily. "I just haven't seen them in several years and I don't want the first thing we talk about is that I'm married. Although that will certainly come up and they will undoubtedly want to meet you. It's just…I don't know if you remember but my mom can be a little…unreasonable when it comes to people from the Seam." Katniss nearly snorted; unreasonable was an understatement. Everyone in the Seam knew her as the Witch. And for some reason, she particularly hated Katniss and her family. She nodded and Peeta looked apologetic.

"I can't wait for them to meet you. And I'll proudly introduce you as my wife. But I feel like I should see them first, so we can-"

"Peeta, you don't have to explain," she cut him off. "I get it. Really." He bit his lip and she attempted to give him a smile.

"I'll meet you at my house…I mean, my mother's house. You know how to get there?"

"Who do you think left you cookies on your front porch when we were kids," he said with a grin. She shook her head.

"Saint Peeta. I can't believe you risked beatings for me like that."

"We can talk about the level of my adoration for you another time. Go on, I'll meet you there." He squeezed her hand before turning toward the bakery and Katniss inhaled sharply as she watched him walk away, his shoulders slumped and his entire demeanor slouching and nervous.

* * *

Mrs. Everdeen looked up as the door opened and she jumped to her feet.

"Katniss!" She embraced her daughter and Katniss ran to the sofa.

"Has she gotten worse?"

"Not really but she hasn't gotten any better either."

"Peeta is coming with the medicine."

"Peeta?!" Katniss bit her lip. Oh how was she going to explain this?

"I'm sort of…married. To Peeta Mellark." Her mother looked stunned and gestured for her to sit down.

"You're going to have to fill me in."

Just as she was getting to the part about Peeta and Katniss going to the Justice Building, there was a knock and Katniss ran to the door. Peeta bowed low to her mother, a package tucked under his arm.

"Good afternoon, ladies."

"Peeta Mellark," Mrs. Everdeen said in awe. "You look so much like your father."

"Um, thank you Mrs. Everdeen," Peeta said, a bit awkwardly.

"Please. Call me Violet. I'm your mother-in-law now!"

"Ah, I see Katniss has told you our news then?"

"Can we cut the chitchat and get Prim the medicine," Katniss said sharply. Peeta looked abashed and thrust the package at Mrs. Everdeen. Katniss hovered over the couch while her mother administered the medicine and her heart sank when Prim didn't stir.

"How long will it take to work?"

"It should start working immediately. Hopefully she will be better in the morning." She reached out to stroke her sister's blonde braids and sighed.

"I miss you so much, little duck."

"Can you two stay for dinner, Peeta?" Katniss frowned; they didn't have enough food to cook dinner for anyone else. But Mrs. Everdeen was behaving as if they had full cabinets. Peeta bowed his head.

"Sadly, I'm due at a peacekeeper meeting soon. But it would be splendid if Katniss stays for dinner, so she is not in that house all alone. I can come and collect you when my meeting is finished." This irked Katniss for some reason; she was used to being alone and did not really mind it. And she often walked around the district by herself at night, before curfew of course. She didn't need someone to "collect" her.

"I can walk home by myself," she said irritably.

"I have no doubts you can," Peeta said, unsmiling. "But this house isn't far from the barracks and I would be glad of the company on my walk home."

"Fine," she huffed. Her mother shot her a what are you doing look.

"Katniss, your husband is kind enough to walk you home."

"Oh, we're married only in name," Peeta stammered. "We haven't had a toasting or anything like that. And let's be honest. No one in 12 feels married until after the toasting."

"Too true," Mrs. Everdeen said, giving her daughter a pointed look. Katniss shot her a glare. Why was she so interested all of a sudden? Peeta cleared his throat, most likely sensing the tension.

"I'll be off. Enjoy dinner, ladies. I hope Miss Primrose is feeling better soon."

"Thanks to you, she will."

Katniss scowled; yes it was Peeta's money but Katniss was the one who entered the contract to get that money. Was her mother going to forget that too?

"I'll walk you out," she said stiffly, following Peeta to the porch. She closed the door behind her and crossed her arms.

"Ah, Katniss," he shifted on his feet and looked nervous. Her irritation with him drifted away.

"Peeta what's wrong?"

"That woman at the Justice Building...asking me if I bought you. It just made me think..." She watched him with a frown. He glanced up at her and cleared his throat.

"I didn't actually ask you to marry me. I just gave you the contract and, well... I feel like a scumbag for that."

"I don't expect a ring or anything fancy," she shrugged, at loss as to why he was feeling guilty. They didn't really do rings in 12 and this was a business contract anyway.

"Will you marry me, Katniss?" She could see how important it was to him. She took his hand and smiled.

"Yes Peeta. I'll marry you."

"And I was wondering if…well, I meant what I said about not feeling married without a toasting. Would you…want to… toast with me?" Her eyes widened.

She agreed that the toasting was the crucial part of a District 12 marriage. It was their special tradition, something 12 strongly believed in. So what would happen if she toasted bread with Peeta? They would really be married. And he'd already told her he loved her.

Would she fall in love with him? Would she become like her mother, dependent on her mate and completely lost if anything happened to him? She'd sworn never to marry. Never to have children. But she couldn't deny the flutters in her stomach when she looked at Peeta. He had always been so kind to her, and hearing that he's always loved her made her heart skip a beat. She'd never imagined this happening but then again, isn't that how life works? Not really sure of where you're headed next, but just that you are going somewhere. Would it continue to be just business or would they actually act like a married couple?

"Forget I asked," he stammered, mistaking her silence for disgust. "Stupid of me. You were forced into this marriage anyway and-" she wanted to shut him up and could think of only one way to do it. She stood on her tiptoes and slammed her lips onto his. He gasped against her mouth but didn't pull away immediately. When his lips didn't respond, though, she pulled back. She had never been kissed before…well, she wasn't going to count her first kiss. It was taken by force, like so many other things. She would try to forget about it.

But this wasn't how it was supposed to go either, she assumed. Peeta was staring at her in shock.

"Katniss?" He was gripping her hands and his eyes were searching her face. She looked back up at him and her face softened.

Yes, she did feel something for him. She didn't know if it was love, for she didn't really know him, but then, did she know what love was? She knew these five years wouldn't be difficult, if they stayed together. He really was exceptionally kind and he wanted to help her. And what would happen after that? He had given her the option of extending the contract. Would she take the money and run, or would she stay with him? His hands started to tremble in hers and she squeezed.

"Peeta, I would like to have a toasting with you." His eyes widened and he looked as if he hadn't heard her correctly.

"Really?"

"You're right. A marriage isn't really a marriage without a toasting. So, yes. Let's do it." He picked her up right off the ground and spun her around, releasing a happy cry. He hastily set her down and took a step back, clearing his throat.

"Sorry. I'm…I'm rather ecstatic right now." She smiled and closed the distance between them; her hand rested on his cheek and he closed his eyes for a moment.

"You're allowed to be happy."

"You'll allow it?" he asked with a smile.

"I'll allow it. Now go to your meeting. Stay safe."

"I'll be back in a little while." He pressed a kiss to her forehead before he could stop himself and smiled when she didn't flinch or pull away. He leaped off the porch and practically danced away; Katniss laughed softly and returned to her mother's house, where the woman questioned her relentlessly until Katniss snapped that she was starving and what were they having for dinner.


	8. Chapter 8

As her mother spooned out some very thin soup, she gazed across the table at her daughter. Katniss had helped her spoon-feed Prim and she was pleased to see that she was already showing signs of improvement.

"So, Peeta Mellark, hm?"

"Mmhm," Katniss said as she sipped her dinner.

"I should have known. When you showed up with Ryen Mellark, I should have known about Peeta." Katniss started.

"You…you knew it was Ryen?"

"I'm a little surprised you didn't recognize him."

"So why did you know who he was and I didn't?"

"Katniss, I've never told you the story about Bran Mellark and I, have I?"

"Peeta's father? No. What story?"

"We were engaged," she says quietly. Katniss nearly spit out her soup. "It was a long time ago but he was always so sweet. He would bring me a cookie when I was working in my parents' apothecary. He asked my father for my hand two years after we met. He was very old fashioned that way," she laughed softly.

"Anyway, we were set to marryand well, one day, this handsome young man came into the apothecary for some medicine for his sister. He admitted he had no money but he looked so desperate. I asked him if he had anything to trade and he offered a song. My parents would have thrown me out if they'd heard I agreed to such a thing. But that moment I heard your father sing…oh Katniss, I swear, even the birds stopped singing to listen. I was completely taken by him. I had to tell Bran I couldn't marry him. My parents threw me out and the Merchants turned their backs on me. Bran made me a small cake for our toasting. He knew your father hunted illegally, he could have turned him in when Ash started to ask him to trade. But he didn't. Bran has always been the kindest soul I have ever met. Clearly his sons have inherited that trait."

"Ryen said he... bought me...saved me for Peeta and Peeta…well, he told me he's loved me since we were kids."

"I wondered who had left those pastries on the porch years ago.I thought it was Bran, trying to help but I should have known Peeta was trying to help you."

"You were too out of it to notice," Katniss said, a little too sharply. Her mother nodded sadly.

"I didn't do right by you girls and I'm sorry for that. But your life could be better than I ever imagined for you. At first I was terrified that you were entering such a contract but to be married to Peeta Mellark. That boy will love you more than anyone could. And a high-ranking Peacekeeper too. You'll have luxuries you've never dreamed about."

"I don't need luxuries. I just want to keep Prim fed and away from the Games."

"She has three more years. You and Peeta can save her life."

"Doesn't eliminate the entries she already has," she muttered.

"No, but you can keep her from entering more. Mind you don't take advantage of Peeta."

"I won't take advantage of him," she snapped. "He's offered me an allowance for both Prim and I, and I accepted. In return, he wants friendship. That's it."

"That's it?"

"That's it! He doesn't want anything else."

"He loves you, Katniss."

"And he can do so much better than a skinny girl from the Seam. I'm just wasting his chance of a normal wife and a family."

"Peacekeepers' children are exempt from the Reaping. You have always been more of a mother to Prim than I have. I would love to see you have children of your own and this is the only way to have them safely and in freedom. You don't have to be afraid of watching them die in the Games, Katniss. Just think about it."

"Think about what? Peeta has already said he doesn't expect anything else from me. And I don't want to fall in love with him, Mom. I don't want to become you." It came out before she could stop it and her eyes widened in horror. Her mother set her spoon down and set her hands on the table.

"Katniss. Love isn't something to be afraid of. It isn't. It can be the greatest thing in the world. It can also be the most terrifying. But every second is worth it."

"But you lost Daddy," she said in a small voice. "And then you left us."

"I loved your father with my whole heart. When he died, I felt like I died with him. I was too selfish to realize I had two beautiful daughters who still needed me. But when I look at you, I know Ash is still here. You're like him more than you know. And you kept us alive, just as he did. Now it's time to let someone take care of you, for once. Don't be afraid to let him in, Katniss. Don't be afraid to let yourself love him." Katniss was silent as she ate the rest of her dinner. What if she had children and something happened to Peeta? She would be all alone to take care of them and what if the Capitol decided to Reap them after all?

But her morbid thoughts were invaded by a rather sweet sight. A little boy with the curliest blonde curls and the brightest blue eyes she had ever seen. She smiled, in spite of herself. She tried to imagine a world, somewhere in the future, with no Games, no Capitol. A place like the meadow in the song she sang to Prim. Where Peeta's children could be safe and healthy and happy. But could she ever give him that? Would they ever be…intimate?

She shivered. Cray had her made her do things but as contraceptives were so limited in the District, he chose to leave her a virgin. At least until their wedding day, when he would officially become her husband and therefore could exercise "all his marital rights", he had said with a lustful smile. He had taught her things, things that he said would please a man. Would they please Peeta, or would they disgust him?

"Katniss, are you alright?" She jumped and blushed. Thinking these things at her mother's dinner table made her face burn.

"Yeah."

"I know we've never really talked about sex before-"

"Mom! I learned about it in school!"

"Ok but do you have any questions? I am a Healer you know. You can pretend that I'm not your mother for a few minutes." Her face burned even more.

"No. No questions."

"Are you sure?"

"If you ask me one more time, I'm leaving."

"Alright, alright, no need to get defensive. Remember you can talk to me any time you like."

She nodded and buried her face in the empty bowl, slurping for good measure. Her mother seemed to find this amusing and shook her head.

* * *

Peeta knocked on the door about an hour later and bowed to Mrs. Everdeen.

"Are you ready to head home, Katniss?" Home. It was such a relative term. But she didn't correct him; she nodded to her mother.

"I'll be by in the morning to check on Prim."

"Stay safe, both of you."

Peeta offered her his arm and they started the trek home. Once they were inside, he shrugged off his jacket and stretched his arms high over his head.

"I hate wearing that thing. It's usually only for formal events but I thought I should dress up a little more at the Justice Building," he glanced at Katniss and she merely nodded.

"Did you eat with your mother?"

"Yes. Have you eaten?"

"Not really. I can make a sandwich before I go to bed."

"Let me," she jumped to her feet.

"Katniss, you don't have to do that."

"It's ok-" she stopped when he grabbed her hand and looked into his pleading eyes.

"I know he treated you like his slave. You don't need to do things for me. You know that."

"What kind of wife would I be if I didn't make dinner for my husband," she teased but his eyes lit up and his lips turned up.

"Ok. But make yourself one too." He knew she hadn't eaten much. She grabbed some ingredients from his fridge and looked around for bread.

"Ryen brought over a loaf earlier. In the drawer to your left." She pulled out the brown bag and buried her nose inside. She inhaled the smell of real bread; not the tasteless grain from tesserae. Peeta was watching her, looking slightly bemused and she quickly shook herself and set to making dinner. She tried not to devour the sandwich too quickly but in truth, she hadn't had anything this delicious in years. She tried to savor the rich tastes of the bread and the tangy mustard on her tongue. Peeta offered her a crisp potato chip and her eyes lit up at the strange crunch. Laughing, he passed her the rest.

"Are Peacekeepers as rich as Victors," she blurted out.

"Not hardly. But the Capitol keeps us supplied with certain luxuries and they do provide us extra stipends. It seems that President Snow approves of this new contract thing and has agreed to increase our stipend so that we can give a portion of it to our new wife. I find it…interesting that he approves of it. It means less children for the Reaping. If we had children…not WE, I mean Peacekeepers in general, I mean…" Katniss almost giggled at how red he was getting.

"Is Ryen a Lieutenant too?" He laughed softly, his blush fading.

"No, he didn't show the initiative I did during training. Though he knew what my motivation was, no one else did and he kept my secret. He supported me the whole time and my Commander really liked me. Said I showed real promise. He's one level above a mere Peacekeeper, though he doesn't have an official title. Because he's my brother, though, he enjoys certain luxuries as well. My whole family does."

"Your mother will certainly love that," she said, unable to keep the bitterness out of her voice. His face fell slightly and he nodded.

"I didn't see her today. She was taking a nap and Dad was the only one in the shop. He was crying when he ran to hug me. I always got along best with Ryen and Dad. Bing is Mom's favorite and took after her. I'd like to take you over there tomorrow though. Dad invited us over for dinner."

"That soon?"

"Katniss, I'm not ashamed of you. Nor of our marriage. And we don't have to tell people it's because of a contract, unless you prefer that. Mom knows I've always had a crush on you. Hell, I imagine most of the district knows. This won't come as a surprise. And if it would make you more comfortable, I can ask Ryen if he will bring Madge too." She nodded eagerly and he smiled.

"It might make her even more horrible to you though. Madge is Merchant and Mom was always trying to arrange a marriage between us. Her and Delly Cartwright, who's been my friend since we were like two."

"With any luck, she'll completely ignore me then." He hummed as he sipped from his mug and she watched him for a moment.

"Did you know about my mom and your dad?" His brow raised slightly.

"She told you?"

"How long have you known?"

"I think Dad told me when I was...12? Maybe 13. I can't remember. I was...moaning and groaning to him that I wished I was from the Seam."

"Why on earth would you wish for something like that?"

"Aside from the obvious?" He quirked his brow and smirked a little. "I didn't feel like I fit in here. I had friends but I always felt a little... different. And I always saw you with Gale Hawthorne...I wondered, if I was the Seam, could I make you smile like that." He shrugged and shook his head. "Crazy thoughts from a little boy but there you have it. So yes, I knew about our parents. I was a little shocked at first but it made sense. He must have loved her a lot, to let her go like that."

"I know Mom is still very fond of your dad. He has been very kind to us over the years. And by the way, Gale and I are just friends so you have nothing to worry about."

He laughed as he set the plates in the sink and took her hand.

"Yeah, I'm sure he will be happy to hear you're marrying a Merchant."

"It has nothing to do with him," she says heatedly. He smiled and shrugged, as if it didn't matter to him in the slightest.

"Come on. I'm beyond exhausted."

He paused at the doorway, giving her the choice but she held onto his hand, leading him into the bedroom. She quickly readied herself for bed and found him pushing the window open, wearing ragged sleep pants and a white T-shirt. He yawned and tossed back the covers.

"I didn't get to put in an order for a new bed today. But I'll do it tomorrow."

"Peeta, we're married. Married people share beds."

"You didn't ask for this, Katniss," he said, his jaw set. "And I'll be completely honest with you. Sharing a bed with you is too much temptation. It will be easier this way. For both of us." She frowned and glanced down at herself. What about her could be considered tempting? She climbed up to him and rested her chin on his shoulder.

"Peeta," she said softly and he turned his head to look at her. "I'm your wife now."

"We haven't toasted," he reminded her.

"But we're legally married. So what's stopping you?"

"Katniss." He leaned up, pushing her off and shook his head.

"Katniss, you didn't read your contract thoroughly." She sat up beside him, frowning.

"What are you talking about?"

"The contract you signed…you basically signed up for the highest price with the least amount of rights. You forfeit all your…rights and assets to your future husband. Including but not limited to, your offspring, your diet and regimen, any outfits you wear, your daily activities, and…your maidenhood." Her eyes widened and he stared down at the blanket.

"It killed me when I saw your signature. Giving up your life like that. And it kills me to think about him doing any of that to you. You're not a piece of property, you don't deserve to be owned. But thinking of him taking control of you like that…it's unbearable, Katniss. And I know he made you do things. You may still be a virgin but I know Cray. I remember the stories from when we were kids. I know he did something to you." She was silent, which confirmed his fears.

"Legally I can take what you're offering. But I can't. I just can't do that to you. So please. Don't make this any harder than it already is. You'll move into the guest room tomorrow, we'll have a toasting this weekend, and you won't ever be a slave or go hungry again. I'll make sure of it." And with that, he settled into the pillows, pulled the blanket over his head, and closed his eyes.

* * *

Katniss couldn't sleep. She tossed and turned and was determined to put as much distance between them as possible. But when she closed her eyes, Peeta was everywhere. His curly blonde hair falling into his eyes, the way it used to. His plump lips curved into a shy smile. His bright blue eyes, brighter than any other Merchant's she'd seen. The way his shirt stretched taut over his muscles. The way he watched her while she ate. His tongue darting out to wet his lips.

Huffing, she turned over and slid off the bed. Doing her best not to wake him, she slipped a pillow under her arm and padded into the living room. It was clear he was not the only one who was having trouble with temptation, although she'd never admit that to herself. She draped herself over the couch and closed her eyes.

" _Take off that ridiculous nightgown." She shivered; she didn't have anything else under the gown, save for a meager scrap of material covering her privates. With shaking hands, she slid the gown over her head and crossed her arms to shield herself._

 _"Get on your knees." His voice sliced through the air as if it was slicing her in half. She lowered to her knees and avoided looking at him. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him pulling at the tie of his pants._

 _"I'm going to teach you how to be a good little wife." He buried his hand in her hair and yanked. Her eyes watered as she looked up at him. Into his eyes. Not at that thing that he was waving in her face._

 _"Suck me." Swallowing, she opened her mouth and he jammed it down her throat. Her eyes watered as she choked but he didn't release her hair._

 _"Close your mouth a little. Make it a tight little hole I can fuck."_

 _Stifling her sobs, she did as she was told and he threw his head back, releasing a groan._

 _"Yessss," he hissed, bucking his hips. His other hand went to the back of her head and pushed her down over him. She choked and gagged but he took no notice._

 _"You'll make a good little fuck toy, Everdeen. I'm sure of it."_

* * *

"No! No!" She sat up, covered in sweat and tears. She screamed and writhed on the couch until she actually fell off of it. The light switched on and she frantically looked around.

"Katniss!"

Peeta fell to his knees beside her and reached out for her. She wasted no time in launching herself into his arms; they tightened around her and held her close. He rocked her back and forth, muttering soft words into her hair. After a few moments, she calmed down and gasped. She realized she was wrapped around him like a vine. She released him and pulled back. His brow furrowed at her sudden change of behavior and she crossed her arms over her chest.

"It was…just a nightmare. I'm sorry for waking you up."

"It's ok. I get them too," he said softly, reaching over to push a strand of hair behind her ear. She closed her eyes at his gentle caress and moved closer toward him. "Why were you sleeping in here?"

"I didn't want…I mean, what you said…I thought I should…"

"Oh Katniss." He shook his head and sat beside her. "I didn't mean it in a bad way. In fact, it's more of a compliment. Being near you makes me crazy."

"That's not much of a compliment," she muttered.

"Well you have no idea of the effect you have on people." She whipped her head around.

"What does that mean?"

"Nothing. Do you think you can go back to sleep?" She nodded and he pulled himself up, using the couch. He held out his hand to help her up and she nodded her thanks.

"Peeta?"

"Yeah?" His hair was tousled from sleep, his eyes were hazy, and the freckles on his nose stood out in the light.

"Will you please stay with me?"

He didn't answer but she saw something in his eyes as she waited for his reply. He knelt down and his arms went under her legs. She let out a little scream as her hands flew around his neck; he gave her a shy smile as he carried her to the bedroom. As he set her on the bed, he bent in and pressed his forehead to hers.

"Always." She didn't care about giving him space; her arms and legs were wrapped around him and he didn't dare try to move away. Her head rested beneath his chin and soon her breaths were steady and even. Her heart beat steadily against him and his fingers made soothing motions across her back. He waited until her breathing was steady and she was fast asleep.

"I love you, Katniss," he whispered to the darkness.

* * *

The next morning, Peeta woke to the sun streaming into his room. He didn't think he'd ever slept that late before. He tried to move but found a weight draped across his chest. Katniss's head had moved lower down his stomach, uncomfortably close to his VERY noticeable morning arousal.

"Ah shit," he whispered, biting his lip. If Katniss moved an inch, he would poke her in the face. He tried to shift sideways, hoping she would move backwards and therefore would slide off of him. But she moaned and buried her nose in his belly button. His hands went to his hair as he squeezed his eyes shut. Why him? Why was the universe torturing him? His shirt had ridden up and her lips met his bare flesh. He tried to flinch away, to no avail. His erection was now so painful he could barely stand it.

"Katniss," he whispered, reaching down to shake her. She didn't stir and he huffed loudly. Regretting his decision already, he yanked himself away and stood up. Katniss fell to the bed and gasped.

"What the-"

"I'm so sorry Katniss but I'm late for training. I mean, a meeting. With the peacekeepers. I've, uh, got to get going!" Doing his best to hide his erection, he hurried into the bathroom and slammed the door, leaving behind a very confused, sleepy silver-eyed girl on his bed.

* * *

Peeta leaned against the door and breathed deeply, running his hands over his face. He quickly turned the knob to the shower and stripped out of his clothes. He nearly sobbed in relief as his erection was set free and he pulled the tattered piece of fabric back to climb in. He stood under the water, not moving. He knew the water was precious and limited but he couldn't bring himself to move. His dick throbbed insistently, prodding his stomach and he cast an irritated glare downward.

"You're going to get me into so much trouble," he growled.

Great. He was now talking to his dick. It had been way too long since he'd had any kind of attention from a female and clearly, his dick agreed. His hand that rested on his flat stomach started to make its way down until his fingers wrapped around his length. He released a low grunt as he tugged upwards, stroking from base to tip. He tilted his head back against the wall and his teeth dug into his lip.

"Katniss," he gasped, picturing her silver eyes and the way she licked her chapped lips. The nightshirt she wore left little to the imagination and this morning, he could see her creamy thighs and just a peek of her plain cotton underwear. He should feel guilty for seeing her like this but at the moment, he could care less. His strokes grew more insistent and his fingers scrabbled against the wall behind him.

"Oh…shit!" His seed washed down the drain and he noticed the water starting to get cold. His chest heaving, he hastily washed his hair and soaped up his body before climbing out.

"Damn it," he muttered when he realized he hadn't brought in clothes with him. He'd been too busy trying to get away from her. He wrapped a towel around his waist and opened the door a crack. She was nowhere in sight so he slipped inside and rushed to his closet. He dressed as quickly as he could, toweling off his hair. He went to the living room and still didn't see her, and started to worry when she wasn't in the kitchen. Had she left for her mother's already? He was about to head over to the Seam when the front door opened and he whirled around.

"Where were you?"

"I was looking for your wash tub. I'd really like a bath soon."

"Wait. Cray didn't show you how to use the shower?"

"The what?" He tugged her hand, leading her to the bathroom. She was astonished to see the knobs turn and water come out of the spout. She didn't even mind how tattered the cloth was nor the lack of space in the stall. Peeta watched her, bemused.

"Didn't he let you bathe…at all?"

"Once. In the bucket behind his house," she said with a shrug. His face hardened and he shook his head. That selfish bastard.

"Use the shower whenever you want to. Just give it a few minutes until you get in because I just got out. The water will be warmer if you wait."

"Warm water?" She looked stunned.

Peeta frowned; he hadn't had many luxuries growing up in the bakery but he had always bathed with warm water, heated from the stove. Had Katniss never had a warm bath before?

He suddenly wished for a large tub, the way they had in District 2. It was a luxurious feeling, being able to stretch out and soak. He swore he would request one with his next pay. He wanted her to feel like the queen that he thought her to be. He pulled her to him and kissed her forehead.

"Your life will be different here. I'll see to that." She blinked up at him and he took a step back.

"I'm going to the bakery and run a few errands. How long do you think you'll be at your mother's?"

"I'm not sure but I want to visit with Prim if she's feeling better."

"Why don't you meet me at the bakery by 4? Dad said dinner will be around 4:30." She nodded and he smiled as he slipped out of the bathroom. Katniss brushed her teeth and worked at the tangles in her hair. She shot the shower curious looks, wondering if there would be a sign as to when it was ready. She brought in the small bag of things she had brought from home, tapping her foot impatiently. Finally she shrugged and dropped her nightshirt. Warm water was rare, a Reaping day treat. Who cares if the water from the spout was cold? When she stood under the spout, she gasped and relaxed immediately.

The water wasn't just warm; it was hot and it soothed her all over. She wanted to lean against the wall and let the water beat her aching muscles. She raised her arms and allowed the warmth to wash away the grime and the filth she still felt from Cray. She wished the bruises would wash away just as easily. She saw how Peeta's eyes lingered on the bruises on her face and she scrubbed at her cheeks. She reached for the little tool her mother had given her; a razor, she called it. She'd never used one in the past but her mother explained that married women kept groomed for their husbands. Did it really matter? Peeta had already made it clear he wouldn't do anything with her. What was the point in being groomed? Nevertheless, she brought the blade to her pit and scraped down. She effectively removed the hair from both pits before she moved down to her legs. The first scrape below her knee, she felt a sting and saw red. She gasped and dropped the razor, clutching her bleeding leg.

"Oww," she hissed, wiping up the blood. Disgusted, she threw the razor aside and shook her head. No point, she told herself. One leg half shaved, the other not at all, she turned the water off and reached for the towel Peeta had left for her. After drying off, she slipped back into the bedroom and pulled out a clean pair of pants and a shirt. She studied her reflection and cocked her head. She was meeting his parents tonight. Her in-laws. Not that she'd never met them before, but she was being introduced as their new daughter-in-law. Perhaps she should actually dress like a girl.

Sighing, she tossed the pants aside and pulled on the red dress he had bought her. She struggled to zip it up and huffed, shaking her head. Why do girls wear dresses? They weren't practical! She quickly braided her hair and gave her reflection one last glance. Shrugging, she pulled on her hunting boots and made her way to the Seam. More than a few boys whistled and catcalled as she neared her mother's house, which she determinedly ignored. When she opened the door, she let out a little cry of relief. Prim was sitting up on the couch, surrounded by blankets and holding a cup of soup.

"Katniss!"

"Prim!" She ran to the couch and threw her arms around her sister. The familiar warmth that surrounded her comforted her and reminded her of why the Seam wasn't home anymore.

"I'm so glad you're ok, Prim."

"Katniss, Mom told me what you did for me! You shouldn't have done that!"

"What choice did I have? I couldn't let you die, Prim! And I'm fine. I promise."

"So are you really married to Peeta Mellark?" Her blue eyes sparkled and she wore a teasing smile. Katniss couldn't help but smile back.

"Is that what Mom told you?"

"Yes. She also said he loves you. You know you're going to have give me the whole story soon."

"Maybe later. Where's Mom?"

"Mrs. Henderson is having her baby so she's already left."

"You mean she left you alone," Katniss replied sharply.

"I'm not a baby, Katniss," Prim said, rolling her eyes.

"But you've been sick."

"She said you would be by this morning. I'm fine, Katniss, really."

"Alright fine. Can I make us some tea?" Prim smiled and nodded.

"Look at you! In a dress and it's not even Reaping Day."

Katniss kissed her head as she hurried over to the stove. The two sisters chatted quietly until Prim fell asleep and Katniss cuddled close to her, keeping a close eye on her.

Their mother returned around 1, clutching a bag of food.

"I stopped by the bakery to speak to Bran," she quietly explained. "And Peeta was there. He sent sandwiches for the three of us. You really lucked out, Katniss." Katniss nodded, her mouth full of roast beef. It was delicious and Prim closed her eyes, licking her lips.

"This is so good. Will he feed you like this all the time?"

"Primrose," her mother said sharply.

"What? It's a valid question. Is he just trying to impress the family or is he going to take care of us like this from now on?"

"He doesn't need to impress us, Prim. The medicine he ordered saved your life. And he's Katniss's husband now. He's also a Peacekeeper Lieutenant. You need to show him the respect he deserves."

It bothered Katniss how nonchalant her sister was being.

"Peeta has always helped us, Prim. I thought you knew that."

"How? How has he helped us in the past?" The story tumbled out before she could stop it. Her mother grew paler as she listened to her daughter's tale. Prim was in tears by the time Katniss got to the part about trying to sell their clothes for food, and had collapsed by the tree behind the bakery. She told them how Peeta had purposely burned bread for her and how his mother had beaten him for it. She reminded them it had been the first time they had eaten in days and they found a way to survive after that. She told them about the countless treats and pastries he'd left in her locker and on their porch. How he had decided, in his training as a peacekeeper, that he wanted to ask her to be his wife, so he could take care of her. How he'd promised to take care of her whole family and he wanted nothing in return.

When she finished, she didn't even realize she was crying until Prim's small thumb raked across her cheek.

"I'm so happy for you, Katty!"

Her sister's affectionate nickname for her made her sob and they landed in each other's arms.

"He'll be so good to you."

"He already is. I can never repay him."

"But he's not asking you to!"

"I know but…I need to find away. You know we don't take charity lightly in the Seam."

"Love isn't charity, Katniss," her mother said firmly.

"Mom," she cleared her throat. "Do you think you could braid my hair for me? I want to look my best when I see Mr. and Mrs. Mellark tonight."

"Of course. I even have a little bit of make up I can put on you. I'll be right back." Prim and her mother crooned over her for the next hour and Katniss practically squirmed away.

"I'd better get going. Told Peeta I would meet him at the bakery soon."

"Katniss can I come visit you sometime?" She bent down to hug her sister.

"You're welcome anytime."

"Take care of yourself, Katniss." Her mother kissed her cheek and she nodded.

* * *

She was halfway down the road toward Merchant Circle when someone shouted her name. She turned and her eyes widened. Gale ran toward her, his game bag slapping against his side.

"I thought that was you but I wasn't sure. You're so gussied up."

"Yeah, I, uh…" Her left leg rose to scratch the back of her right leg and she bit her lip.

"So the rumors are true?" She stared at the ground. "You married a Peacekeeper." It wasn't a question but she winced at his cold tone.

"Gale, I-"

"I could have taken care of you, Katniss."

"No you couldn't have. Prim was dying and we needed medicine. Expensive medicine. Entering that contract was the only way to save her. And it did. She's better today."

"And that was worth throwing away your freedom?" Anger flashed in her eyes.

"Of course it was worth it! She's my sister, Gale!"

"I know, I'm…I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. I know how much Prim means to you. But Katniss…I wanted to marry you. We'd be good together. I'll still wait for you, if-"

"My contract is five years," she said flatly. "You won't wait for me."

"But if you-"

"Gale, we're done talking about this. I'm married. And he's…he's a good man." Gale's nostrils flared but he nodded.

"Where are you off to now?"

"The bakery." He snorted.

"Why? Need a toasting cake?"

"I'm meeting my mother and father-in-law." Gale's eyes widened and he took a step back.

"Mellark? You mean you're married to Mellark?"

"His name is Peeta."

"Peeta's been dead for three years! His mother killed him!"

"That was just a rumor. He was taken to 2, to be trained as a Peacekeeper. He returned and asked for my hand."

"You mean he bought you," he snarled.

"Gale-"

"You honestly think I'd be ok with this? Married to a…a…Merchant Peacekeeper?"

"It really doesn't matter how you feel about it," she said coolly. "Peeta and I are married. We're having a toasting tomorrow. I would like it if you attend. And I'll ask you to keep your opinions about Merchants to yourself. Have a good evening, Gale." And with that, she slipped by him and continued on her way.

"You're a Merchant already. Sticking up her nose and walking by the hungry." She whirled around to glare at him but he was already walking away from her. Sighing heavily, she continued until she saw the bakery come into view.


	9. Chapter 9

The bakery was still open and she prayed there were no customers inside. Taking a few deep breaths, she yanked the door open and flinched at the sound of the bell. Thankfully the only person around was Bran Mellark. He looked up and a smile crossed his face.

"Well there she is. Come in, Katniss, come in!"

"I'm sorry, Peeta told me to meet him here-"

"He's in the back. Come on in. We'll be eating upstairs. Hey Peeta! There's a Miss Everdeen here to see you!" Peeta poked his head out, his face splitting into a grin.

"Hey you." He hurried from behind the counter to kiss her cheek. "You look beautiful," he muttered in her ear before turning back to his father. Katniss noticed that he was being overly affectionate today. That was probably just because they were in front of his family, she reasoned. At home, he seemed almost indifferent.

"I guess introductions are unnecessary but Dad, Miss Katniss Everdeen. Katniss, Bran Mellark."

"A pleasure, Miss Everdeen. Or should I say, Mrs. Mellark," he shot his son a wink. He looked far happier than Katniss had seen him in ages.

"Ah, not until the toasting," Peeta stammered in reply.

"Legally, it is though," Katniss said softly. "Mellark, that is."

For some reason, Peeta's face was bright pink.

"I'd better get upstairs and finish setting the table. Peeta, I'll let you finish cleaning down here and you can meet us in a few minutes?" He nodded, still rather red, and his father disappeared into the kitchen. Peeta cleared his throat and took one of her hands.

"How is Prim feeling?"

"She's so much better. I can't thank you enough, Peeta, I really can't."

"You don't need to. I'm just happy she's ok. I hope you all enjoyed the sandwiches I sent."

"They were delicious. Prim ate hers in two bites I think." He laughed softly as he made his way back behind the counter to wipe it down. She took notice he was wearing a white apron tied around his middle and his hair fell in waves across his forehead rather than being styled. She liked this look much better. More like the innocent boy she knew years ago. Much younger and more carefree.

"I'm glad you liked them. I'd love to have her over for dinner one night. Your mother too."

"Well, how about tomorrow night? For a toasting?" His hand froze over the cloth he was using to clean with and his head snapped up.

"Really?"

"Well you said we would do it this weekend. Why not tomorrow?"

"Katniss, I…you've made me the happiest man in the world." She smiled and rested her hand on top of his. He jumped and snapped his fingers.

"I almost forgot. I have something for you." He held up his finger for her to wait as he hurried back into the kitchen.

When he returned, he held a small plate with both hands. He smiled shyly as he set it in front of her. It was a small cake with green frosting. In yellow letters it read, "Happy Birthday Katniss" . Underneath the letters was a single dandelion.

She stared at the cake for the longest time; it was one of the most beautiful things she'd ever seen. She finally looked up at him and saw him watching her.

"My birthday was several weeks ago," she said softly.

"I know. I'm a little late but I'm pretty sure you've never had a cake of your own." She shook her head and he went to fetch a fork.

"I'm afraid I don't have any candles. So just pretend. Make a wish." Katniss squeezed back tears as she leaned over the counter. Peeta was startled to see her eyes glistening and he yanked the counter up so he could move closer.

"Katniss what's wrong?"

"I already made a wish," she whispered. "I wished that you were safe. For you to come home. And you did. I couldn't wish for anything else."

He gaped at her until she threw herself at him. Her lips claimed his and for a moment, he didn't know how to react. But she wasn't going to let this kiss be like their last one. She wound her arms round his neck and leaned into him. He responded immediately, one arm wrapping around her waist while his other hand rested on her cheek. His tongue raked along her lip but didn't force his way in, as Cray had. Katniss parted her lips with a sigh and he slid his tongue into her mouth. After a few gentle prods, her tongue danced alongside his and he groaned as he felt her respond. At the moment he could care less if it was just a contract and that he should probably be shielding his heart; she was kissing him and she felt incredible. He tilted his head so he could deepen their kiss and her hands fingered his blonde locks. His erection nudged her belly but neither of them cared. He was on the verge of leaning her against the counter, the rest of the world be damned.

"Peeta Mellark!" They jumped apart, both blushing furiously. Katniss hastily wiped her mouth and looked up at the glowering woman before them.

"Um…Mom, we were just about to come up-"

"After you fornicated on the counter? You will scrub that counter down after dinner, you understand me? Now wash your hands…and your face! Your father finished setting the table ten minutes ago, and Ryen's sweet fiancé helped me finish dinner. So hurry up." She cast Katniss a disgusted look before she turned and stormed into the kitchen. Peeta gave a weak chuckle and Katniss turned to look at him with wide eyes.

"Katniss, I'm sure you remember my mother?"

* * *

Peeta's hand on her back steadied her as he lead her up the stairs to the apartment over the bakery.

"Hey everyone," he announced their arrival.

"About time, we're starving in here," Ryen called from the kitchen. Peeta rolled his eyes but took Katniss's hand and lead her to the table. Madge shot her a warm smile and a wave from across the room and Katniss wondered how she was feeling now that she knew who her husband was. She certainly looked considerably happier.

"Everyone, this is Katniss Everdeen," Peeta pulled a chair out for her.

"I thought you two were already married," the elder Mellark brother said, his brow shooting up.

"Ok legally we are but our toasting is tomorrow. So she's Everdeen for one more night. Katniss, this is Bing and his wife, April. You already know Ryen and Madge, Dad…and I'm not sure you've ever met my mother."

"We've met," Mrs. Mellark sniffed. "Peeta, make yourself useful and get everyone something to drink." Peeta gritted his teeth but did as he was told. Katniss jumped to her feet and ran to his side.

"Let me help."

"Katniss, you're our guest. Please, sit."

"Let her help," Mrs. Mellark said as she set the pot on the table. "Everyone else has helped with dinner tonight." Katniss lowered her head and started passing out drinks. Ryen shot her a wink and Madge made a face at Mrs. Mellark's back, which instantly made her feel better. Mr. Mellark cleared his throat and offered everyone stew and bread.

"What kind of stew is this," Katniss asked as Peeta spooned some onto her plate.

"Why does it matter," Mrs. Mellark spat.

"Oh, I was just curious.

"Mom," Peeta muttered.

"It's lamb stew with dried plumbs," Mr. Mellark said cheerfully. "I take it you've never had it?"

"No but it looks and smells delicious."

"Have some bread with it." Mr. Mellark tore off a piece for his wife before he passed it to his youngest son. Peeta glanced at Katniss out of the corner of his eye and swallowed thickly as he passed her a slice. The bread was rich with nuts and raisins and brought back a whirl of memories. Katniss took a huge bite and couldn't help but release a pleased moan.

"So Madge, darling," Mrs. Mellark's tone changed completely as she turned to the Merchant girl. "When does your father want to have the toasting?"

"Oh, he wants to plan for it this week. And he said he would more than happy to have it at our house. Everyone is welcome, of course," she smiled around the table.

"Oh but my dear, Merchant toastings are supposed to be family members only," Mrs. Mellark said sweetly.

"Who here isn't my family," Madge said, meeting her gaze. Ryen snorted into his stew and his mother cast him a scandalized look.

"Well…I suppose when…a non Merchant marries into a Merchant family, he or she does become a Merchant…" she cast Katniss a sickened glance and Katniss determinedly avoided looking at her.

"Mother, as I've expressed before, I'll thank you to keep your opinions to yourself. Especially ones that involve my fiancé." Katniss was shocked that Peeta was talking like this to his mother, for her. She squirmed in her seat and relaxed instantly when he found her hand under the table. He placed their joined hands on his knee but did not remove them. She felt a certain sense of comfort and safety radiating from him.

I will protect you. Even from my own mother, he seemed to be saying. She squeezed his hand and he shot her a smile. Even in this cramped space filled with tension, his smile made him beautiful.

"So Peet, you excited to have a huge wedding with the whole district attending?"

"I'd prefer it to be just family and friends, but I know it's customary to have a ceremony in that barn near the barracks. I heard that's where Darius had his. But I'd like the actual toasting to be…semi-private. You're all invited, of course."

"I'll start on a toasting cake first thing in the morning, son," his father shot him a wink.

"Thanks Dad. Whatever kind of cake Katniss wants."

"Oh, I um…I don't really know," she stammered, lowering her head.

"These bakers have to make everything complicated," Madge laughed across from her. "Go for vanilla, Katniss. It's a classic."

"And boring. Chocolate is better," Ryen shot her a wink.

"Well, we may just have to have a cake tasting in the morning to figure out your favorite," Mr. Mellark said kindly, giving her a warm smile. Peeta squeezed her hand as she blushed.

"So, April dear, how much longer until I meet my granddaughter," Mrs. Mellark turned the conversation away from Katniss.

"Mom, we already told you it could be a boy," Bing said patiently.

"We have another month and a half to go," April said with a smile. Katniss saw her stroking her large belly and her blue eyes sparkled. Bing smiled and draped his arm around his wife's shoulder and she leaned into him.

"As long it is a healthy baby, we don't mind what the sex will be," Mr. Mellark said with a kind smile.

"Yes but how I would love to see a little girl. This family has far too many boys as it is. And I was meant to have…well, it would be nice to add another girl to our family, is all." For some reason, Peeta's face had gone red and he was glaring at the table. Katniss kept a wary eye on him, their fingers still intertwined.

"And how about you, Madge? Any plans for children?" Both Madge and Ryen started to choke on their food.

"Mom," Ryen's eyes were watering. "Can you at least let us get married before you start asking for grandchildren?"

"You don't want to wait for long! Women need to have babies while they're still young, you know. And Ryen will make such a wonderful father." Katniss stared at her plate, bracing herself for the question.

Except it didn't come.

She angrily looked up at Mrs. Mellark and saw her sipping at her water as if she hadn't a care in the world.

"And what about me," she said before she could stop herself. Mrs. Mellark's brow raised.

"I beg your pardon?"

"Do you not expect grandchildren from your youngest son? Or is it that you can't stand the thought of a grandchild that's half Seam, half Merchant?" Peeta's hand squeezed hers tightly in warning but she glared at the woman at the head of the table.

"You don't think Peeta will be a good father? Because he will be. He'll be the most wonderful, loving, patient father there ever was. And he won't EVER hit his children." There was silence around the table; jaws were wide open and Mrs. Mellark looked like she could breathe fire.

"I KNEW you were Seam trash!"

"Margaret," Mr. Mellark bellowed.

"You heard her, Bran! She comes into OUR house and eats OUR food and insults me at my own dinner table? You're nothing but a gold-digging little whore, after our hard-earned money-"

"That's enough!"

Katniss's jaw dropped; it hadn't come from Mr. Mellark but from Peeta. His breathing was heavy and his usually kind eyes flashed with fury.

"Enough," he said again. "You will never again speak like that to or about my wife, do you understand me?"

"Like mother, like daughter," she continued to sneer. Peeta jumped to his feet and looked like he was about to flip the table over.

"And you, you ungrateful little filth, worthless as ever-"

"Mom," Ryen jumped up and stood next to Peeta. "Peeta is Lieutenant of District 12. My commanding officer. And yours. I think you should watch what you say to him."

"Margaret, show our son the respect he deserves," Mr. Mellark growled.

"Respect," she sniffed. "No one will show him respect once they find out he's married this trash."

"We're leaving," Peeta grabbed Katniss's hand and made for the door.

"Peeta, wait!" His father hurried after him and Peeta gave him a pained look.

"Let him run. He's always been worthless. Never able to do anything right. Now look at him. In bed with a Seam slut."

"Thank you for dinner, Dad. Bing, April, Madge…it was great to see you again. As for you, Mother, Katniss will be wife to a peacekeeper. Which is higher rank than a Baker's wife. I suggest you show us both some respect if you expect protection in this district." And with that, he yanked Katniss out of the apartment and down the stairs.

* * *

She trembled as she followed him home.

He didn't try to hold her hand and his hair was a complete mess from his fingers. She chewed on her lip as she tried to think of something to say.

It was her fault. She shouldn't have gone off on his mother. He had just come home and now his relationship with his family was ruined. And it was all because of her.

He pushed their door open and slammed it shut. He stalked into the bedroom and ripped at the buttons of his shirt. Katniss lowered herself onto the couch, still shaking.

"Peeta," she tried to speak but it just came out all garbled. She could hear him stomping around the bedroom and she winced when she heard him move to the kitchen. Dishes started to crash and she jumped off the couch. She hurried into the bedroom, quickly packed her things together, and slipped out the door. She wasn't far from the house when she heard her name being called. She froze as she heard his footsteps catching up to her.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Peeta, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to cause trouble between you and your mother. I understand if you don't want to see me ever again. I'm just going back to my mother's and I-"

"You signed a contract, Katniss. Do you not understand what that means?" She swallowed and looked up into his darkened eyes.

"It means you're bound to me for five years. So this running off back to Mommy's house needs to stop right now. You're to be my wife, living in my home. Do you understand?"

She had never heard him speak this way. Least of all to her.

"I'm nothing but trouble for you."

"You let me worry about that." He yanked her bag out of her hand and she brought her arms around, hugging herself.

"Peeta, your family hates me. How can you be with someone that your family hates?"

"My family doesn't hate you. My mother…she's just a cold Merchant woman with no heart. She's always been that way. You didn't do anything wrong, Katniss. In fact, no one has ever defended me the way you did." She froze and her head jerked up to look at him. His eyes had softened and he looked pained.

"What you said back there…no one's ever stood up to her like that. And I would have done it if I weren't such a damn coward."

"Peeta, you're no coward." She stepped closer and rested her hand on his cheek. He closed his eyes for a moment, opening them again to meet her gaze.

"She's called me worthless…all my life. And I believed her. I took her crap and never said a word. She had me convinced that no one could ever love me or want me…I was too weak, too…useless. There were times she even…god, she dug into my manhood. There was one time I was sketching…um, something rather naughty, and she caught me. I was terrified that she would beat me but she tore it up in front of me, saying I'd never be able to please a woman or make anyone happy. That I wasn't... capable. She screamed at me to be a man. I was stupid to think being a peacekeeper would change anything. In her eyes, I'm still the useless little baker who can't do anything right." He hung his head and Katniss noticed his hand was bleeding.

"Come on," she said softly, tugging him back toward the house. She pulled her bag from his grasp and set it on the couch, then led him into the kitchen.

Sitting him down, she wet a cloth and started to clean his hands. His eyes were locked on her face.

"I didn't mean to speak to you like that. I was just scared. It's nearly past curfew and I was afraid you were leaving me and…I just worry about you, Katniss." She didn't say anything but examined his hand.

"Do you have a first aid kit?"

"It's just a scratch." But he winced when she ran the cloth over it and Katniss noticed a slice of glass embedded in his flesh.

"I need tweezers. And ointment for the cut."

"In my bathroom," he croaked. She rested a hand on his shoulder for a brief moment before going to get the first aid kit. When she came back, he was hiding his face in his uninjured hand.

"This might sting a bit." He flinched but didn't pull away. She didn't know how she was so calm around blood because it usually made her sick but she concentrated on her task and removed the shard of glass. She quickly spread ointment across the cut and bandaged it up. When she finished, he glanced at his hand before looking up at her.

"Thank you, Doctor Everdeen."

"Not hardly," she snorted. "Prim and Mom are the healers. I hate being around the sick and the wounded."

"Well you took good care of me. Thank you."

"You're welcome. Are you alright?"

"I'm alright, as long as I didn't scare you away."

"You didn't. I didn't want to leave. I just felt guilty about-"

"Don't," he said, cupping her chin. "You don't know what it means to me." She closed the kit and washed her hands in the sink.

"Do you really think I'd make a good father? Or were you just trying to bait my mother?"

She turned slowly and saw him trailing a finger along a design in his table.

"Peeta, you'll make a wonderful father." He smiled sadly.

"I love kids. I mean, I always wanted them one day…but I don't know."

"Why not? You're a high-ranking official, you'd be able to actually care for them and you won't have to watch them be Reaped or starve to death."

"Yeah. I mean…I dunno." Her brow furrowed as she watched him. He cleared his throat and stood up to stretch.

"It's getting late. Should we head to bed?"

"Yeah. If you don't mind sleeping beside me again."

"I placed an order for a bed, but it will be a few days." Her heart dropped and she nodded. They hadn't spoken about their kiss in the bakery but Katniss hoped it meant something. Clearly, though, he still wanted space.

"I'll just brush my teeth…" she hurried off and Peeta watched her scurry away. Sighing deeply, he rifled through his drawers until he found a fresh pair of underwear and pants. Since Katniss was still in the bathroom, Peeta peeled his boxer briefs and his slacks down his legs. He kicked them aside and bent down to step into the clean pair.

Katniss's eyes widened; she had come out of the bathroom to find an unsuspecting Peeta undressing. And no matter how much she knew she should, she couldn't look away. Everything about him, from his muscular back to that shapely behind made her quake. She shook herself and scowled, pushing the door against the wall so it made a noise. Peeta jumped and hurriedly pulled his pajama pants up.

"God you are silent when you walk."

"It's the huntress in me."

"Ok well do me a favor and don't sneak up on me when I have a gun." She scoffed as she lay down on her side.

"I don't go near people when they have guns."

"Do you still go into the woods?" She bit her lip but nodded.

"It's how I get food."

"You don't have to worry about that anymore," he said softly.

"It's my refuge. Just being out there makes me feel…calm. It's an exhilarating feeling."

"Katniss, you know it's dangerous. And as the wife of a peacekeeper…you'll be watched more closely. I just want you to be careful."

"I will," she assured him. He turned to stroke her cheek and she was lost in his gaze.

"I would die if anything happened to you."

"I'll stay safe, Peeta. I've taken care of myself for 8 years. I'll be fine."

"I know." He reached out to turn off the light and settled into the pillows. She tried to maintain her distance and left a space between them. She flipped onto her side and felt like she would fall off the edge of the bed but it gave him the distance that he so clearly wanted.

* * *

Katniss first registered frantic movement behind her and then she heard the muttering.

"No…no." He was moaning in his sleep and his face was screwed up in pain. She hovered over him, unsure if she should wake him or not. He tossed his head and chewed on his lip.

"Please," he whined. "Please don't."

"Peeta?"

"No," he said louder, starting to thrash around. She narrowly avoided being kicked in the shin and she gently shook him by the shoulders.

"Peeta wake up!" He shook his head but she placed her hand on his cheek and gently stroked his hair back.

"Peeta," she said soothingly. "Wake up. It's just a bad dream. You're safe." His eyes fluttered open and he looked confused. She leaned over him, her lips inches from his, and her hand still on his face.

"K…Katniss?"

"You were having a nightmare," she said softly. He groaned and covered his face with his hands.

"I'm sorry I woke you."

"It's alright. Peeta…why won't you look at me?" But he turned away from her, ashamed. What kind of grown man thrashed around because of his nightmares? Had he called out in his sleep? What did she think of him now?

"I think I'll ,uh, go sleep on the couch," he said, his face red with embarrassment.

"You won't either. There's nothing to be ashamed of, Peeta. I get nightmares too. You saw it yourself the other night." He nodded but didn't move toward her. She reached out to stroke his hair and he felt himself start to relax.

"Do you want to talk about it?" He shook his head and sank back onto the pillow. Sighing, Katniss settled back down too and stared up at the ceiling.

"My mom likes to remind me that I was a mistake," his voice was soft and nearly broken. Katniss blinked in the dark and he stirred beside her.

"I wasn't planned. She and Dad wanted to stop at two and then found out she was pregnant. But then she was so sure it would be a girl. She told everyone, I mean, the entire district, that she would finally have a daughter. And then when I was born…she refused to hold me. Dad had to hire a wet nurse to feed me because my mother refused to do it. She was angry at me for being born. For being a boy. And she never forgave me for it. On top of that, the birth was complicated and she had some problems. The doctor told her she couldn't have any more children. So not only was I a failure, I took away her chance at ever having a daughter." Katniss sat up and moved closer to him. He didn't move away so she took her chances and covered his hand with hers.

"You are not a mistake," she said quietly. "I can't imagine how someone so cruel produced someone so good. But she's wrong about you, Peeta. I wish you could see how wonderful you are. How I see you." He turned to look at her and shifted so he was lying on his side. His fingers wrapped around hers.

"How do you see me, Katniss?"

"You saved my life, Peeta. You're good and you're kind and strong and smart. Your mother doesn't know how lucky she is to have a son like you."

He stared at her in the darkness for the longest time. She started when he raised his hand and it hovered over her. He hesitated but then brought it to her cheek, as he started to stroke her hair back, just as she had done with him.

"You were pleading with someone," she said softly and he tensed. "Was she hitting you?"

"She always hit me. At first it started out as little smacks on the hands, if I stole a cookie. One day I dropped a bag of flour and she slapped me across the face. It started progressing from there, if she was angry, she would give me a quick slap. The bruises didn't come until much later, when I was older. I just started telling people I got into a fight with the rolling pin and lost," he smiled weakly but she looked horrified. "After I started to wrestle, I used that as my excuse. Lots of rough housing but Mom would still hit me when she got irritated. She hit my brothers too but she always seemed to hate me when I was growing up and I never knew why. It wasn't until Bing told me about my birth that I understood."

"There is no excuse for hitting your child," she said through gritted teeth. "None. If I could have, I would have reported her to the authorities."

"Well, since I AM the authorities, we'll just let it go," he chuckled. But he sobered immediately and his palm returned to her cheek.

"You'll make an amazing mother one day, Katniss."

"No I won't."

"Why not? You love fiercely and I know you would give your life for Prim. That sort of devotion should be shown to a child. I can just imagine how you would protect them." For a brief moment, Katniss's mind was invaded by two children: one with dark hair and bright blue eyes, the other with blonde curls and grey eyes. They were beautiful and Katniss knew without a doubt who their parents were. She shook her head, determined to rid herself of those images and Peeta's brow furrowed.

"I'm sorry for keeping you awake. Go back to sleep, Katniss."

"Peeta." He waited but she didn't say anything and he couldn't see her properly in the dark.

But when he moved to flip onto his back, he felt her hair tickling his arm as she buried her face in his chest. He wrapped his arms around her, holding her close and his heart beat frantically in his chest.

* * *

Peeta awoke, feeling his heart lighter than it had felt in years. What was so special about today?

Then his eyes fell upon the creature sleeping next to him and his eyes widened.

I'm toasting with Katniss Everdeen tonight. Even in his head, it didn't sound real. She released a little moan and turned her head, away from him. He smiled at the way she slept with her hand tucked up under her chin, forming a little fist. He wanted to get to the bakery early to start on the cakes for her to sample. He imagined his father would be upset with his behavior last night, running out like that. He started to get out of bed and glanced back over his shoulder. Just to watch her sleep a little while longer. He showered and dressed and was surprised to see her still asleep. He knew she was a huntress and had early mornings. He moved a strand of hair out of her face and gently stroked her cheek with the back of his knuckle.

"Hey," he said softly, leaning close.

"Hm?" She stretched her arms over her head and her eyes fluttered open.

Peeta's smile was the first thing she saw and to be honest, she could live with that. It lit up the whole room this morning.

"Morning. I thought we could head over to the bakery to figure out what kind of cake you want."

"We don't have to do that," she said sleepily. "I don't want anyone to go to any trouble-"

"It's no trouble at all," he cut her off. "This is your toasting cake. I want you to love it."

"This is OUR toasting cake. What is your favorite flavor?"

"I'm partial to strawberry, myself. Lemon is good too. But Ryen is right, you can never go wrong with chocolate. I will never say no to chocolate."

"You're making my head spin." He chuckled and kissed her forehead.

"Well, get dressed and we will figure it out together." She nodded and yawned as she stood. Her eyes fell on the clock beside the bed and she gasped.

"Is that really the time?" Peeta nodded as he adjusted the bandage around his hand.

"Yeah, you were sleeping so well, I didn't want to bother you."

"My gosh, I haven't slept that late…ever, I think."

"Well maybe it was a good thing then. Catch up on some well deserved sleep."

"I'll dress really quickly," she grabbed her bag and carried it into the bathroom.

"Take your time. And Katniss, feel free to unpack your things. This is your home now." He gave her a smile and pulled the bathroom door closed. She stared into the mirror, frowning at her puffy eyes and messy braid. She was getting married tonight. Actually toasting with Peeta Mellark. So why wasn't she more afraid?


	10. Chapter 10

When she was ready, Peeta was waiting by the door and smiled when he saw her.

"You're a vision."

"You need to have your eyes checked." His smile faded and he shook his head.

"You don't take too well to compliments, do you?" She bit her lip.

"Sorry," she said quickly. "I'm just…not used to them."

"Get used to them. You'll be hearing a lot of them in this house."

He shot her a wink and she suppressed a laugh. He held out his arm and lead her toward the bakery. Katniss was relieved to see the bakery was mostly empty when they arrived. Mr. Mellark was behind the counter, chatting with one customer while another customer enjoyedheir breakfast at a table in the corner. His father shot them a smile when Peeta opened the door and Peeta lead her to another small table off to the side.

"Alright, I'm going to get you some breakfast and get started on those cakes. You sit here and enjoy."

"Oh but Peeta-" but he was hurrying behind the counter, grabbing an apron, and opening the display case.

"What do you think, Katniss? Danish, bagel, or breakfast sandwich?"

"Um…a Danish. Please." He chuckled while he plated one and brought it out to her.

"She likes the sweets."

"Well then she's marrying the right guy," a voice said behind them.

"Delly!" Peeta ran to embrace the young woman and nearly picked her up.

"My god Peeta, is that really you? District 2 changed you! Look at those muscles!"

"Be quiet. It's really look great, Dell!"

"Stop it," she giggled while she playfully slapped his chest. "Peeta! Aren't you going to introduce me?"

"Oh…right, of course. Delly this is-"

"Katniss Everdeen," the blonde girl squealed. "Oh my gosh, it's so nice to meet you! Officially. I mean, I know we went to school together and everything but I've heard SO much about you from Peeta, I mean, he's had a crush on you for YEARS-"

"Ooooook Delly, you can stop now," Peeta muttered, his face a brilliant shade of red. He ran his fingers through his hair, making it stand on end and making him look like a sixteen year old again.

"God. Well, I'm glad I already told you before she outed me ." Delly giggled and nudged Katniss as if they were the oldest of friends.

"Look how cute he is. Seriously, Katniss, you've got a good one here. He's a real sweetheart." Peeta squeezed his eyes shut while Delly gently slapped his cheek. Katniss could do nothing other than

nod.

"Anyway, I need to get going, I just had to stop in and see you since you haven't been to see me yet!"

"I've been…a little busy, Dell."

"Oh I know, I'm just teasing you! You finally got her, Peeta! When's the toasting?"

"Tonight," he muttered. "I was going to come over and invite you after I made the cake-"

"Making your own toasting cake! That's crazy! Hey Katniss, don't let him work too hard, ok? I'll see you both tonight!" She gave Peeta a loud smack on the cheek and for some reason Katniss didn't understand, her hand shook with anger. Peeta shook his head and reached up to rub the back of his neck.

"I am so sorry about that," he mumbled. "She's…very enthusiastic. But she's got a good heart." Katniss nodded stiffly. She didn't want to think about how good they looked together when they were hugging just now. Luscious blonde curls, bright blue eyes, ample chest and thick lips…she was everything Katniss was not. And she was Merchant. Like Peeta's mother wanted. Their children would be beautiful.

"Hey," she registered his hand on hers and she jumped. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah." She jerked her hand back and Peeta's brow furrowed.

"Peeta, I already have four cupcakes cooling so as soon as you frost

them, you can let Katniss taste them," his father called.

"Great…that's great, Dad, thank you." He didn't look away from Katniss but continued to watch as she picked at her Danish.

"Um…I'll just go and frost the cakes and bring them out to you. What kind of frosting do you like?"

"I…really don't know. Just…surprise me?" He nodded and she avoided his eyes. What had happened? They were fine when they woke up this morning. Did Delly's appearance bother Katniss? Her lips were rather thin and she seemed tense.

"I'll be back in a moment." Peeta let himself behind the counter and Katniss sighed as she rested her cheek on her hand.

He wasn't gone long and he had a shy smile when he returned, holding a plate of four cupcakes. He set it in front of her and then sat across from her.

"Alright, this is a lemon cake with a lemon frosting. This one is chocolate with a white frosting. This is vanilla with white frosting. And this one is a chocolate with a chocolate ganache frosting. I've got strawberry, carrot cake, red velvet, and more vanilla in the oven now." Her jaw dropped as she stared at the plate of sweets. She'd maybe had a sweet treat four or five times in her life and here he was, handing her a plate full. He grinned as he handed her a fork.

"Moment of truth. Let's see what your favorite is."

"What if I don't have a favorite? What if they're all delicious?"

"Well then I'll make them all for you," he chuckled. Her eyes widened.

"No, you can't do that. Ok, let's see." He watched as she dug her fork into the chocolate first. His smile grew as he watched her face, her first time tasting so many different delicious flavors. She let out a little moan when she tasted the lemon.

"What do you think?"

"I love the lemon and the vanilla."

"Ok, narrowing it down," he grinned. "Let me get the others out here."

* * *

He laughed loudly as she wrinkled her nose at the bite of carrot cake. She actually finished all of the red velvet. The strawberry was much too sweet, in her opinion.

"Here's vanilla again, but with chocolate frosting. You might like the two flavors together." She did; her eyes lit up as she took a bite nd she nodded.

"That might be it."

"Vanilla with chocolate frosting?"

"Wait, you said you liked the chocolate better than vanilla."

"I want to make this cake for you, Katniss."

"But it's OUR toasting," she argued. "So, can we do chocolate for you and vanilla for me?"

"A marble cake," Mr. Mellark chuckled over their shoulders, making them jump. "That one is extremely easy to make. Is that the one, kids?" Peeta's eyes locked on hers and he smiled easily.

"Yes. Mix our favorites together."

"Done," the baker said gleefully. "I'll bring the cake over tonight. Your brothers would like to see you, Peeta. At Bing's house."

"What? Why?"

"Possibly because their little brother is getting married? I'm sure Katniss has plenty to do with her family as well. I'll see you both tonight."

"Thank you, Mr. Mellark." He gave her a warm smile and clapped his son's shoulder.

"Please, Katniss. Call me Bran."

"Dad, shouldn't I stay and help?"

"Make your own toasting cake? Absolutely not. Allow an old man this small happiness, of making a cake for his son and his bride." Peeta grinned and glanced back at Katniss.

"I guess we should uh, get you to your mother's. Want to bring them some breakfast?" She did but she felt terrible asking for it. He seemed to understand and shoved several danishes and other pastries into a bag before he held his hand out toward her.

"Come on."

"Peeta," she said quietly as they walked. "I don't expect you to keep feeding my family."

"That's why you did this, Katniss. I know you just want to keep your sister and your mother fed. They're important to you, so they're important to me. I'll help you. Let me help you." She swallowed but nodded and continued walking.

Prim and Mrs. Everdeen squealed when Peeta stepped on their porch and Katniss rolled her eyes.

"The beautiful bride! And Peeta, you look so handsome today!"

"Thank you, Violet," Peeta said warmly. "Miss Primrose, you are looking wonderful this morning."

"You've already gotten her to marry you, Peeta, you don't need to suck up to me," Prim giggled. Peeta chuckled but their mother threw her a stern glare.

"I need to get to my brother's house but here's some breakfast for you ladies. Katniss and I already ate."

"Aren't you sweet," her mother gushed, peering into the bag. Peeta seemed nervous and tugged on Katniss's hand. Her mother ushered Prim back inside and closed the door. Peeta cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck. Katniss was discovering this was a nervous habit of his but it made him look boyish and adorable. She scowled to herself. Adorable? Since when did she think anyone was adorable? What was happening to her?

"Katniss, I…I just want to say…I can't wait for tonight. You've…you've made me very happy."

"I haven't done anything," she said quietly.

"You're marrying me. And that's everything."

"But…how can you be so happy…when all you want is a friend? I mean, you would be better off with someone like Delly, who can give you children-"

"I don't want someone like Delly," he cut her off. "You're the one I've wanted. I thought I explained that to you."

"I just don't understand why," she said with a desperate sort of shrug.

"Well, I don't think it really matters, does it? Oh, I almost forgot. Here's your birthday cake. You can share it with your mother and Prim." He gave her a gentle kiss on the cheek and stepped off the porch. "I'll see you tonight." She nodded and when he was gone, reached up to touch the spot where his lips met her skin. She watched him disappearing down the path and out of the Seam.

* * *

When she returned, her mother and her sister started to fuss over her.

"Prim, get her a bath ready and make sure to use my rose wash. Katniss, let's figure out how you want your hair for the ceremony…oh! Come with me." She tugged on her daughter's hand and lead her to her bedroom. At the foot of the bed was a giant trunk that Katniss had only seen inside once, when she was very small. Her mother knelt and pushed the lid open; Prim gasped behind them. Her mother pulled out a beautiful wedding dress of lace and satin and held it out. Katniss stared at her in shock.

"Your wedding gown?"

"I married your father in this and when things got really bad, he wanted to sell it. But I said no, I wanted to pass it down to my daughter one day." Katniss shook her head and took a step back.

"Prim should have it. I don't…I'm not really marrying-

"You may think that it's just a contract," her mother interrupted gently. "But I see the way he looks at you. And when you don't think anyone's looking…I see the way you look at him." Katniss's head snapped up and she wore a frown. But her mother gave her a sad smile and held the dress up against Katniss.

"Please, Katniss. Wear it. For me."

Katniss took it from her mother and turned toward the mirror. Prim and her mother stood behind her, smiling through their tears.

"Katniss…you'll make a beautiful bride," her little sister gushed.

"I'll finish your bath," her mother clapped her hands together like a 5 year old . Katniss had never seen her mother this way, not that she could remember anyway. Prim reached down and squeezed Katniss's hand and the elder Everdeen swallowed thickly.

"Oh little duck…is this really happening?"

"If it was ever going to happen, and we hoped it would, it wouldn't happen with anyone but Peeta Mellark. I know that Gale asked you to marry him on your birthday."

"What," she spun around to face her sister. "How?"

"Rory," she shrugged. "He's got a big mouth. But he told me that Gale asked you to marry him and he was laughing that you said no."

"What a good brother," she mumbled.

"No it's not that. I think his exact words were "Katniss Everdeen is too good for my brother. In fact I think that's why she's stayed single all these years. She's too good for any man around here."

"He did not say that."

"I swear he did. But I think he's right. I think you've stayed single…because you were waiting on someone else." Katniss turned back to the mirror and blinked back tears.

"I thought he was dead, Prim. I never thought he would come back."

"But you wished for it," her little sister said gently. "So a little part of you had to believe that he was still alive." Katniss's silver eyes met her sister's soft blue ones in the mirror. "Let him love you, Katniss."

"I don't even know him, Prim. He said…he said he's loved me since we were kids. But we're strangers! Getting married. And he knows why I'm doing this-"

"And yet he still wants to marry you," her sister said gently. "Doesn't that say something?" Katniss stared at their reflections.

"When did you get so smart, little duck?"

"I've always been smart, Katniss. I get it from you."

* * *

"Guys, is this really necessary?" Peeta pulled at the bowtie that was currently cutting off his air

supply. "It's just a District 12 toasting. A casual ceremony."

"A District 12 toasting with the girl you've been in love with all your life," Bing said with a smile. "Now stay still. We should really give you a haircut too."

"No," Peeta's hand shot up to cover his blonde locks. "I just had one in 2. It's short enough as it is."

"Alright fine, no hair cut. But you're going to shave, right? You look scruffy."

"I'm back in my big brother's life less than a week and he's already picking apart my appearance," Peeta muttered under his breath.

"I missed out on three years of your life," Bing said sadly. "Let me enjoy this."

"Let him, Peeta. That way he'll leave me alone."

"You're next," Bing shot over his shoulder and Ryen's smile fell. Peeta chuckled as he pulled on the jacket his brother had set out for him.

"Yeah, Bing I agree with Peeta. I like the jacket but the tie is too much. He looks like he's going to a dinner with President Snow."

"And that's a bad thing?"

"He's marrying Katniss Everdeen," Ryen waved aside. "She's as simple as they come."

"What's that supposed to mean," Peeta snapped.

"Hey, no need to get defensive. I didn't mean it as a bad thing, just that Katniss never cared for fancy things or dresses up like the other girls in the district. She's different. I like her." Peeta tried to do his cufflinks and Bing patiently tugged on his sleeve.

"I'm happy for you, baby bro. Really."

"Bing I thought the baby bro talk would stop when I became a Lieutenant," Peeta muttered as he nervously flattened his hair.

"Not a chance, baby bro," Bing smirked. Peeta rolled his eyes and Ryen laughed behind them.

"Laugh now but your toasting is in two days," Bing reminded him.

"I haven't loved Madge nearly as long as Peeta's been in love with Katniss."

"Did everyone know," Peeta asked softly. Bing and Ryen both snorted.

"You mean like the whole district?"

"Oh please, the day Mom found out, I think all of Panem did too."

"I don't even remember when she found out, to be honest. How old was I?"

"Peet, there have various stages of your life where your obsession has shown."

"I am not obsessed," Peeta protested.

"Alright well you forget, I was in the bakery when Dad brought you home from your first day of school. You were MOONING over this girl you met. 5 years old and already proclaiming love. You kept saying you needed to know how to bake a toasting cake. That you were going to marry the silver-eyed songbird."

"Oh," Peeta's face burned.

"My favorite is when Mom found his sketch book," Ryen chuckled. Peeta's face went even redder at that.

"I, uh, remember her tearing up one particular drawing."

"Yeah and you had like a hundred more. All of her."

"I believe that was the summer we introduced little Peet to Capitol Penthouse." Both boys chortled and Peeta glared.

"Mom found those magazines under MY bed and I couldn't sit down for a week."

"Sorry but we couldn't neglect your education, could we?"

"Ooh and let's not forget when Mom found the birdhouse you made for her when you were 8!"

"I wanted her to have something pretty," Peeta mumbled. "Because when she sings-"

"The birds stop to listen," his brothers finished together. Peeta's eyes widened and Bing winked.

"See? I told you. Everyone knows how you've felt."

"Bing," they heard April call from downstairs.

"Ah, damn. Excuse me, gentlemen, I'll be right back." Bing hurried from the room and Peeta fidgeted in front of the mirror.

"You're the only one who knows the truth, Ryen."

"Peeta," his brother appeared in the mirror beside him. "Just because this is a contract doesn't mean it's not real."

"It's not, though. She did this for her family. Why else would she marry me?"

"Because you're a good man," his brother said firmly. "And you love her more than anyone I've ever seen. It's a little intimidating, man, to be honest with you. I don't know if Madge and I will ever be like that."

"Just because I love her doesn't mean she loves me," Peeta said softly. "I don't want her to feel obligated to love me. I told her that when I showed her the contract. I told her I don't expect anything from her, except friendship."

"So you're not even going to give her a chance to love you?"

"What could I ever offer Katniss Everdeen," he said sadly. "The five year old boy didn't understand what marriage meant. How can I make her happy?"

"She looked pretty damn happy last night when she was holding your hand! Why are you being a martyr, Peeta? Sure it might take some time but she could wind up loving you as much as you love her. You're practically a stranger to her! So become friends. Start there. And then you work your way up to husband and wife."

"District 2 made you pretty smart, Rye." Ryen chuckled as he pulled on his jacket.

"I've always been smart, Peet. I just don't show it often."


	11. Chapter 11

Peeta insisted that he had to go to the bakery so Rye and Bing said they would meet him at his house. They would have the toasting at the house and then a ceremony for anyone who wanted to come in the barn. Peeta didn't really care who attended, to be honest. All he could think about was feeding her that bread. His father found him in the kitchen putting finishing touches on the elegant cake.

"Peeta, I told you I would bring it over later tonight," his father gently scolded.

"I know Dad but I needed to put an extra touch on it. Can I grab a loaf of bread for the toasting?"

"Of course. Here's a few that just came out of the oven." Mr. Mellark went over to the display case and reached in for one.

"Not that one…the one to your left." His father raised a brow.

"This one?" Peeta nodded firmly.

"You're sure?"

"Positive. And I think I'm finished with the cake."

"Then, let's get you home to your bride."

* * *

Peeta and his father carried the cake through town and people stopped to stare. A toasting was already plenty of gossip; a peacekeeper's toasting was twice that. Katniss Everdeen marrying a Peacekeeper…wait…that Peacekeeper is Peeta Mellark, the baker's son who vanished without a trace. Peeta might have just won the Hunger Games, by the way people were whispering and staring.

As they passed Victor's Village, Peeta could just make out a figure waving to him from the front porch. He knew it was Haymitch Abernathy, District 12's only living Hunger Games Victor, and he was never seen without a flask in his hand.

"Going to be quite a shindig, I hear," Haymitch called to him.

"Stop by if you like," Peeta called back, surprising himself.

"If there's liquor, I'm there!" Peeta shook his head as his father grunted and adjusted the cake.

"Dad, this cake is huge. I told you we were just wanting something small-"

"Peeta you told me when you were five years old that you were going to marry this girl. I didn't want it to just be something small. I want this to be everything you've been dreaming of." Peeta gave his father a grateful smile as they hurriedly carried the cake into his house. Ryen and Bing leaped forward to help and Bing let out a whistle.

"Damn Dad, why didn't you ask for any help?"

"Peeta was there," the baker shrugged.

"And I can tell Peeta decorated it too. Where do you want to set it up, Peet?"

"Um, we should probably set it up in the barn."

"Let's leave it in the kitchen and we will carry it over after the toasting." Peeta nodded and wiped his forehead with the back of his wrist.

"Is Mom coming," Ryen muttered. Peeta shrugged half-heartedly.

"I saw her for a minute at the bakery and asked her if she would be at the toasting. She said only if it was with someone other than Katniss."

"Ouch," Bing said with a wince.

"She's a frigid bitch," Ryen growled.

"Ryen," his father said sharply.

"Oh don't you try to defend her, Dad. How she treated Katniss and Peeta last night and now, not even coming to her own son's toasting?"

"It's fine, Rye," Peeta mumbled.

"Son-"

"Don't, Dad. I don't want to…all I care about today is-"

"Whoa," Ryen said, his wide eyes on something behind Peeta. He whirled around, his brow furrowed, until his eyes widened to match his brother's. Katniss floated…there was no better word for it…she floated through the door, followed by her sister and her mother. Her long dark hair actually flowed around her shoulders, nearly touching the small of her back. Her dress was simple but beautiful. She wore delicate white shoes and around her neck was an elegant strand of pearls.

She was breathtaking. Peeta could barely move until one of his brothers nudged him and then had to practically shove him forward.

His face was red when he reached her and he swallowed a few times.

"Katniss…uh, wow, you look…wow." Prim giggled behind her and Katniss quickly shushed her. Peeta's face went even redder.

"Can we get this thing started or what," Ryen called from across the room.

"April and Delly are on their way," Bing said. "But go ahead and begin." Katniss suddenly wished they had done this part alone. They would have to repeat old District 12 vows and Katniss was terrified she would mess up in front of everyone. Peeta held out his hand, looking shy, and she placed her hand in his. He pulled her over to the fireplace and everyone moved closer. His father handed him the plate of bread, still covered, and Peeta knelt on the rug in front of the fireplace. Katniss struggled with her dress for a moment and blushed as she knelt beside him.

"I hope I can remember my vows," he leaned in to whisper in her ear.

"Your beauty has completely taken all my words away."

She went even pinker, matching his rosy blush.

"Um…I hope you don't mind. I know the bread for toasting is usually wheat or sourdough. But this one seemed right," he uncovered the bread and she sucked in a breath; it was the raisin and nut bread from dinner last night. The same bread he had thrown to her in the rain. His eyes met hers and they were glassy.

"Katniss," he began but the door burst open and they jumped.

"I'm sorry I'm so late! Dad wouldn't let me leave the shop. Oh I've interrupted! Please, continue!"

"Jeez Delly," Ryen muttered, shaking his head. Delly squealed another 'sorry' and Peeta cleared his throat. He reached over to tear off a piece of the bread and he leaned in to hold it over the fire. Although the flames licked at his fingers, he turned it over, making sure it was completely toasted. When he drew back, he said his vows in a clear, ringing voice. Her lips trembled as she opened her mouth and allowed him to feed her. She repeated his actions, holding the bread close to the fire but not letting it burn. She knew her mother would object to her using her hands to toast the bread but she hardly felt the flames. The bread was a little more than toasted when she drew back and she grimaced.

"I'm sorry, I think I burned it," she muttered, shaking her head. His hand covered hers and she met his gaze again.

"It's perfect." He didn't look away as she fed him the burned piece and recited her vows. She felt like her voice was shaky but Peeta didn't seem to mind; in fact, she thought he was about to cry.

"Alright you two, kiss already," Ryen called gleefully.

"Ryen," Bing hissed at his brother. Peeta's face and neck were beet red and he bit his lip as his eyes drifted down to her mouth. They'd already done it once. Well, more than once really. So what was he waiting for? She leaned forward and pressed her lips to his. He stood up on his knees, cupping her face with both hands as he eagerly responded. Katniss forgot that her mother and sister were watching, along with his family and their friends. She could only concentrate on the feel of his tongue exploring her mouth.

"Sheesh, that's enough already," Ryen said, avoiding looking at them.

"Would you behave yourself," Madge hissed.

"You'll soon have your chance in the spotlight," Peeta said with a wink and a grin. Katniss licked her lips as he stood and helped her to her feet. Everyone came rushing forward to congratulate them and her mother hugged her tightly. Prim cried into her chest and Peeta watched with a smile. Peeta's brothers and father carried the cake over to the barn and everyone else followed them. Peeta held Katniss back and he went into the kitchen for something.

"I hope you don't mind but I ordered you a bouquet for the ceremony." The bakery was near the florist but Katniss had always thought flowers were a waste of money. She gasped, however, when he pulled the bouquet out.

It was a gathering of wildflowers, yellow dandelions, primroses, and little white katniss flowers. They were bundled together with a simple green ribbon and he held them out toward her.

"Do you like it," he asked shyly.

"It's perfect," she breathed.

"The florist didn't even want to take the order…said wildflowers didn't belong in a bouquet. In the end she only did it when she found out who I was."

"Well I don't like their fancy roses and such. These are more beautiful."

"You can leave it here if you want to," he said quickly. "You don't have to carry it around-"

"I want to carry it with me," she assured him. They walked to the door and Peeta held out his arm.

"Shall we join them?" She nodded and hooked her arm under his. He paused on the porch and bit his lip.

"Can I…can I kiss you again?"

"You don't have to ask, Peeta."

With a grin that took her breath away, he leaned in to kiss her and she draped her arm around his neck. He bent her slightly backward and kissed her passionately. Her heart was felt real. It's real, she told herself.

"Hey! The party is missing something! Like a bride and groom!" They pulled away and Bing laughed and winked as he hurried back toward the barn. Peeta cleared his throat and pulled at his jacket.

"Alright, Mrs. Mellark. Let's go enjoy our party."

* * *

They entered the barn, hand in hand, and Katniss gasped softly as their wedding guests started to sing the traditional wedding hymn. In their voices, she heard her father singing and her eyes filled with tears. Peeta noticed immediately and pulled her close.

"Are you ok?"

"I'm fine. I was just thinking of my dad."

"He's right here with you, Katniss." He pulled a few of the white petals from her bouquet, much to her chagrin; but her expression softened when he put the flowers in her hair and pushed her dark locks behind her ear. She leaned in and gave him a quick kiss and loved the way his hand rested on her cheek. She found that she really liked kissing him…and hoped very much they would make kissing a permanent condition of the contract. As he lead her over to the cake, she released a gasp of delight. She immediately recognized the delicate flowers made out of sugar and paste; Peeta's strong hands had crafted almost a hundred small katniss flowers that decorated each tier.

District 12 might have been the poorest of them all but they knew the best way to celebrate was with music. Someone had brought their violin and another had a banjo, and the barn was filled with lively tunes. Peeta didn't dance much, she noticed, but she stayed with her sister and Madge in their little dances. When the musicians started a slow song, Katniss approached her groom and held out her hand. Peeta stared at her hand and then looked into her eyes.

"I haven't really danced before, Katniss."

"Then I'll teach you. Come on."

He didn't move to take her hand and he looked nervous.

"I want to dance with my husband."

Something flickered in his eyes and he swallowed at her words. He put his trembling hand in hers and she pulled him to the center of the room. She positioned his hand on her waist and took his other hand in hers.

"Just hold me," she whispered.

"That I can do," he replied, just as softly. They moved in a slow circle, his eyes boring into hers. They didn't notice that they were now the only ones dancing; everyone was standing off to the side, watching.

Mrs. Everdeen sniffed and dabbed at her nose with her handkerchief. Mr. Mellark watched the couple with a broad smile. Katniss reached up and draped her arms around his neck; both of his hands fell to her waist and he pressed his forehead to hers.

"I feel like if I look away, or even blink, you'll disappear and this will all be a dream."

She slid her hand to his cheek and slid her palm across his freshly-shaven skin. She didn't have any words of adoration; after all, words were Peeta's thing, not hers. But the feel of her hand caressing his face made him moan softly and they moved even closer together, so that they were no longer moving but were just holding each other. The song trailed off but Peeta did not release his bride. He tipped her chin upwards with a single finger and kissed her sweetly. Normally Katniss would have recoiled at being the center of attention but now, she hardly noticed. Her senses were overwhelmed with Peeta Mellark.

The feel of his skin beneath her hand, the smell of cinnamon and sugar and even a hint of dill, the taste of his lips, so sugary sweet. No doubt about it; she was now a goner too.

Katniss moved toward the lemonade pitcher and found her path blocked by a burly figure with a downcast expression.

"Katniss-"

"I really don't have anything to say to you, Darius." She sidestepped him and he held out his arms.

"Please, hear me out." She huffed and shook her head.

"I never even dreamed that he would be the one to buy out your contract," he said quietly. "The truth is, I saw Peeta's name on the list of transferring Peacekeepers. I knew he took a fancy to you a long time ago and I know how you and Hawthorne have a misconstrued opinion of Merchants. I knew good and well that Peeta wouldn't like the idea of buying you but he would push aside his unease and make sure no one else would have that chance. But then his train was delayed and Cray got to you before I could do anything. When I heard  
I...I felt horrible, Katniss, I really did. I'm glad it all worked out in the end but...I'm so sorry." Katniss watched him warily. She wasn't about to admit to Darius that Cray had tried to break her, that he gloated that he had finally caught Katniss Everdeen in his snare. The great huntress had become his prey. Darius may have had honorable intentions but she had still lost a small part of herself because of his meddling.

"It's fine, Darius."

"But-"

"It's my wedding day, Darius," she cut him off. "Let me enjoy it."

He opened his mouth but closed it.

"Of course." He gave her a slight bow. "Congratulations, Katniss."

She turned and instead of getting something to drink, she went to find her groom. He was standing in front of the cake, chatting with Madge, Ryen, and his dad. Katniss walked up to him and slid her arms around his waist. If he was surprised, he didn't show it. His arm automatically draped around her shoulder and he leaned in to kiss her temple.

"Rye is saying it's time to cut the cake."

"People are hungry," his brother whined.

"You're always hungry," Madge poked his stomach, giggling. Katniss smiled as she watched Ryen kiss her friend's cheek. Madge looked very happy.

"Hey everyone, the happy couple is going to cut the cake!" Peeta stood behind her, one hand resting on her waist while the other rested on her hand.

"I'm going to mess this up," she muttered.

"It's impossible to mess up a cake," he said in her ear.

"Says the baker."

"Just go slow. Like this." A camera flashed as he pushed her hand down and kissed her cheek.

"Smash it in her face," Rye yelled. Peeta's grin lit up the room as he held the forkful of cake up to her lips; only Katniss could see how much his hand trembled.

* * *

Katniss was exhausted but as this was a peacekeeper's wedding, and a high-ranking one at that, people continued to come up to congratulate them throughout the night. His brothers had dragged him across the room, and she rested her head on her sister's shoulder while they watched people dancing. She hadn't seen Gale, though the rest of the Hawthornes had stopped by to give her hugs. So immature, she thought to herself. He just didn't like losing. And he thought he had lost her, even though she had never really been his to begin with.

"I'm really happy for you, Katty," her sister said softly, squeezing her hand.

"Do you think it would be rude to tell everyone to go home," Katniss yawned. Prim giggled.

"Yes. And a Lieutenant's wife must be kind and compassionate."

"He married the wrong person then."

Prim snorted and shook her head.

"You're ridiculous." Katniss yawned again and rose to her feet.

"I need some fresh air." She cupped Prim's chin for a moment before hiking up her dress and hurrying to the side exit of the barn. She nodded and muttered her thanks as people called out their congratulations and well wishes.

* * *

She sighed as she leaned against the column, pressing her forehead to the cool wood. There was a pleasant breeze in the air tonight and her hair blew freely around her shoulders.

"The loveliest bride I have ever seen," a voice sent a chill down her spine. She tensed but did not turn around.

"You are kind to say so, sir," she said stiffly. She gasped as she felt his hand on her shoulder.

"I must confess I am jealous of Lieutenant Mellark at the moment. I am surprised he has not brushed everyone off and hurried you home. He must be so eager to bed his wife." She swallowed and stared straight ahead as he lifted a strand of her hair to his nose and inhaled.

"My sheets do not smell as sweet as they did several days ago. Perhaps when your husband is tending to his duties I shall help you find a way to pass the time?"

"Commander." A deep voice behind them made Cray jerk back and Katniss's shoulders relax.

"Many congratulations, Officer Mellark. I am sure you both will be very happy together."

"Thank you," he said firmly, wrapping his arm around her shoulders and stepping between them. "We're glad you could celebrate with us."

Katniss tried not to recoil. No, they were not glad at all. Katniss couldn't wait to get as far away from him as she could.

"We were just discussing when you will go back to work. Whatever will your sweet wife do to ease her loneliness?"

"Oh I would never leave her for too long. Besides, she helps her mother and her sister with their healing duties and she knows my mother would be more than happy to have her assist my family at the bakery. I am sure she will find plenty of things to keep her occupied," he said cheerfully. Cray looked sour.

"Indeed. Well I must be off. Have a pleasant evening Mr. and Mrs. Mellark."

"And you sir," Peeta nodded as Cray marched off into the night. When he was gone, Katniss slumped against him and hid her face in his chest.

"Easy," he whispered, kissing her forehead. "He will never touch you again, Katniss. I swear it."

"Can we go home soon, Peeta? I'm dead on my feet."

"Of course. Let's say our final goodbyes and then we can head home."

* * *

 _ **I'm sorry about the delay again guys, I just moved back home to TN from CA and it was a LONG roadtrip! Will hopefully post another one next weekend but hope yall enjoyed the toasting and wedding! Xoxoxo**_


	12. Chapter 12

_**so just a warning but this one gets a bit smutty. It's their wedding night afterall ;) read at your own risk!**_

* * *

Peeta's father had already taken the leftover cake to wrap up at the bakery; Ryen and Madge were one of the few couples still dancing, and Prim had fallen asleep in her chair. Katniss gently shook her awake and hugged her family goodbye. Peeta kept a hand on her lower back as they made their way around the room, thanking everyone again. Darius and Rosalie gave her giant hugs, and Delly gave Peeta a loud kiss on the cheek. Finally, Peeta tucked her arm under his and escorted her out of the barn.

Peeta disappeared into the bathroom to change and to allow Katniss to change out of her dress. But she didn't move, her mind racing about what would happen next, and was still sitting on the edge of the bed when he reentered the bedroom. He stopped, cocking his head.

"Are you alright?" She nodded and stood, turning to present him with her back.

"Would you mind helping me? Prim and Mom helped me into it."

"Of…of course." His fingers fumbled as he slowly dragged the zipper down, revealing her bare back.

In another life, this could be real. This could be the start of their wedding night, in which he would gather her in his arms and give himself, body and soul, to her. He yearned to see her, spread out on the bed, only for his eyes. His mouth craved every part of her, his tongue darting out to wet his lips.

When he had the zipper down past her waist, he cleared his throat and made to turn.

"There you are." But she pulled her arms from the sleeves and let the material bunch around her waist. She turned just enough for him to see the curve of her uncovered breast. His mouth went dry as she brought one arm up to cover herself but the other reached down to push the dress down her legs. She stepped out of it, standing before him in nothing but a pair of simple white panties. He had a hard time swallowing and his hands hovered awkwardly in the air.

"Katniss," he said in a choked gasp. She bit her lip and turned her head to look at him over her shoulder.

"It's our wedding night, Peeta. Don't you want me?"

"You don't have to do this. We don't have to do this."

"Do you want me," she repeated, sounding vulnerable. He reached out a shaking hand and with a single finger, stroked up her back and across her shoulder.

"I have never wanted something so much in my entire life."

"Then I'm yours." She turned, slowly, her arms shielding her upper body from him and her face cast toward the floor. His eyes hungrily traveled across her frame but he cupped her chin and brought her eyes to his.

"Are you sure?" She surged forward and her lips claimed his. He moaned into the kiss, his arms wrapping around her slender form and pulling her back with him. He sat on the edge of the bed and she stood between his legs. She played with the waistband of his sleep pants; he shivered as her fingers slid under his shirt and tickled the skin she found. She dropped to her knees and pushed the shirt up and over his head. His head dropped backwards as her tongue darted out to taste his strong jaw. She secretly loved the little sounds that were coming from deep within his throat. As she sucked at his chest, her hands stroked him through his thin pants and he jerked his hips. His head snapped up when she tried to yank his pants down his legs and his hands flew to her wrists.

"Katniss, stop. You don't…I don't need…I mean…"

"I want to, Peeta." He watched her as she pulled the pants down and threw them aside. She licked her lips as she appraised him, which made him release a deep groan. Her fingers went to the waistband of his blue shorts and she looked back up at him.

"Can I?"

"I'm yours completely," he answered honestly. He lifted his hips to help her slide them down and those too were discarded. Katniss had seen a fair amount of naked men on her mother's kitchen table. But none could compare to Peeta.

To be fair, those men were sick or dying and Peeta was healthy and robust.

Beautiful, she decided. He was beautiful, every inch of him. And she'd never called a man beautiful before. But Peeta…her boy with the bread, he was glorious. She trailed a finger down his chest, following the trail of blonde hair past his belly button and down below to forbidden destinations she'd never allowed herself to imagine. He nearly yelped as her palm touched his sensitive flesh and she chewed on her lip, her eyes meeting his again.

"Help me?" Her voice was timid and she looked not only shy but embarrassed as well. He knew without asking that she had never done this with anyone before. Cray may have forced her to do things but it was obvious she was a novice in the ways of intimacy. Which means she'd never been with Gale Hawthorne. Peeta had been jealous of the taller boy, watching them together as they traded with his father. He thought Gale was something more to Katniss, someone she would share her secrets, among other things with.

She trailed her fingertips down his length and across his sac. Another gasp escaped him and she withdrew her hand.

"You can touch me," he moaned.

"Only if you want to."

"I want to…make you feel good. Will you show me?"

"You're making me feel good already. Just follow your instincts." He knew she was smart and her determination was one of the things he loved about her. He decided rather than coaching her, he would let her explore freely and would step in if she needed any help.

Her teeth buried in her lip, she held his balls in her palm, then moved up to rake her knuckles down his shaft. Her movements were more exploratory than seductive but that didn't matter to him.

"It's so hard," she said in awe, "but your skin is so soft."

He let out a nervous chuckle as she continued to discover him.

Peeta, for his part, was so close to coming undone and was fighting with everything he had to hold on. But she was the star of every fantasy he had ever had and he'd dreamed of having her hands on him for as long as he could remember.

And right now, seeing her on her knees, her small breasts on display, with her hand wrapped around him, was enough to do him in. She noticed a drop of liquid on his tip and covered it with her thumb.

"Ah fuck," he muttered, his hips jerking up. Her hands flew back to her lap and she looked anxious.

"Did I hurt you?"

"God no, Katniss. What you're doing feels amazing. You are amazing." She didn't contest him, but returned her hands and grasped him softly. It was his turn to dig his teeth into his bottom lip.

"You can grip harder…close your hand around me and squeeze."

"It won't hurt you?" He smiled, loving her all the more. He cupped her chin lovingly and leaned toward her.

"You could never hurt me."

She did as he said and closed both hands around him. He nodded and leaned back on his elbows.

"Move your hands up and down. And you can…do that with your thumb again."

"Like this?" He eyes slammed shut as her thumb stroked his head again.

"Fuck! Yes! Just like that."

"I've never heard you curse," she said in wonder, cocking her head as she moved her hand up and down. His face burned and he mentally kicked himself.

"S-sorry. It's just…you make me feel…unlike anything I've ever felt before. I feel like I lose all control."

"I like it," she said shyly, her eyes meeting his again. He hardened even more in her hand.

"Oh fuck Katniss, I'm so close. Just go a little faster. Move your-YES!" His head fell back again as she picked up her pace; she knew she should put her mouth on him but she wasn't quite ready for that. And she knew Peeta would never want her to do anything she wasn't ready for, even though Cray hadn't been worried about that. She shook herself, chastising herself for bringing HIM into their private moment.

"Katniss! Oh god, Katniss!"

She watched in wonder as white liquid spurted from him and all over her hand. She continued to move her hand up and down, uncertain when she should stop. He collapsed on his back and his entire body shuddered as he struggled to catch his breath. He reached down and closed his hand around her wrist. Her actions ceased immediately but he tugged on her hand.

"Come here." She crawled onto the bed and he turned on his side, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face in her hair.

"You're amazing," he sighed.

"Was it…good?" She sounded so uncertain so he kissed her forehead and smiled.

"It was the best thing I have ever felt," he said tiredly. Katniss smiled, pleased with herself. He kissed her temple and propped himself up on one arm.

"Now will you let me explore your body, the same way you just explored mine?"

She didn't know how she felt about the thought of Peeta touching her. She'd never touched herself before, always sharing a bed with Prim. Cray had stuck his finger inside her and she'd pleaded for him to stop. Besides, he had been too focused on his own pleasure to worry about her.

She bit her lip and fell onto her back.

"Katniss, I would never force you to do anything you don't want to. You know that." She nodded.

"I know," she said softly.

And she did. She trusted Peeta. And truth be told, she wanted him to touch her. She wanted to come undone at his hands, the same way he had just come undone at hers.

But she was terrified. And he knew that.

He leaned down to press a kiss to the corner of her mouth and he kissed her palm.

"I want to worship your body, Katniss. I want to cover every inch of you in my kisses and my reverence. Will you allow it?"

"I'll allow it," she said after a long pause. He flipped over and crawled up her body, his fingertips teasing her ribs and down her arms. His kisses kept her distracted but when he felt his thumb on her nipple, she broke the kiss with a gasp. Peeta gave her a little smirk before he lowered his head to her breast and wrapped his tongue around her darkened areola. Her hands flew up to his hair, wrapping around his curls. He moaned against her chest and moved to lavish the other one, while tweaking her nipples between his fingers.

"Oh," she gasped, arching her back.

Peeta kept his eyes on her as he trailed his tongue down her the valley of her breasts and down to her belly button. His eyes sparkled as he reached the edge of her underwear then drew back with a questioning glance. A quick nod was all he needed before he slowly pulled them down her legs. Feeling self-conscious, she twisted and writhed, trying to cross her legs.

"Katniss."

"I tried to shave my legs…and only managed to do one. I'm sorry." He laughed softly and shook his head.

"I couldn't care less about the hair on your legs, Katniss. You are so damn beautiful that it almost hurts my heart to look at you." She grasped the blankets with her fists and Peeta spread her legs, kissing her knee and inner thigh. When his lips met her soft lips below, she gasped and sat up straight. He massaged her knee with his fingers and leaned up to kiss her.

"Trust me," he said against her mouth. She nodded and he sucked her tongue into his mouth, inviting her to join in on the dance. His hand moved from her knee to her center, not pushing inside but merely massaging the fleshy folds. He tore away from her mouth and kissed his way back down her body, taking his time to suck on her breasts and leave kisses in his wake. When he lowered his head between her legs, she wanted to snap them closed in mortification; he was staring at her with a mixture of awe and adoration and desire. She lifted her head to see him but his eyes were so dark there seemed to be no blue left in them.

"Peeta-" she felt like she had swallowed her tongue, at the first touch of something wet and warm on her center. Peeta rested his palm on her stomach and used his other hand to part her folds. He merely touched her at first, trailing his fingertip across her sensitive skin, and then his tongue followed. He trailed his tongue up, until his lips found something extraordinary that made Katniss's back arch off the bed. He grinned to himself and nodded.

"There it is," he said, almost to himself. After that, he kept coming back to that spot.

Katniss wrapped her hands in his hair again and unknowingly grinded her hips against his face. His moan against her skin made her eyes slam shut and her legs fall open even wider.

He sat up on his elbow and kept his fingers moving across that spot he had found.

"I'm going to put my finger inside you. You tell me if you want me to stop." She tossed her head from side to side. She could care less what he did, as long as he never took his finger away from that spot. His thumb pressed against it while he slowly slid his middle finger inside her. He marveled at the way she clenched around him, the way her tightness surrounded him. Fuck, he wished it was his cock he was filling her with right now. Her fingernails scratched his scalp and he glanced up at her.

"Ok?" She couldn't nod but he took that as a yes. He bit his lip as he slowly added a second finger. She was so wet, he easily slid them in and out.

"Oh fuck Katniss, you are perfect," he muttered. He doubted that she could hear him, or was even paying attention to him in her state of delirium. He lowered his mouth again and replaced his thumb with his tongue.

"Peeta!" How his cock swelled at that sound. He unintentionally rubbed himself against the bed and winced at the friction. He wanted to draw this out longer, make it a long-lasting night of pleasure for her, but the way her walls were fluttering around his fingers told him she was close. His lips closed around that little nub of pleasure and he sucked, until she screamed his name, her entire body launching off the bed. Peeta held her down and licked her softer than he had been, until her tremors faded.

"You've no idea how many times I have dreamed of doing that," he said as he made his way back up to her mouth. She said nothing as she leaned up to kiss him and started when she tasted something strange. With a jolt, she realized it was from her and his lips and chin were shiny with her arousal. When she kissed him again, she found she did not mind it.

"Was that ok," he asked as he settled on his side, pulling her into his arms.

"I've never felt anything like that before," she said, her eyes already closing. "Have you done this with a lot of women?" He snorted and rested his head on the pillow.

"Why would you ask that?"

"You seem awfully learned."

For some reason, her voice was laced with something other than exhaustion. It was almost…bitter. With a start, he realized she was jealous.

"Would it bother you if I said I have?" She huffed and shrugged his arm off her shoulder.

"No. I couldn't care less."

"Your reaction says otherwise."

"Good NIGHT, Peeta." He chuckled to himself and draped his arm over her waist.

"It's only you, Katniss. It's only ever been you."

Katniss's eyes fluttered open for a moment; a smile played around her lips before she closed them again and fell asleep against his chest.

* * *

The next morning, Peeta woke up with his face buried in the pillow.

The sheets were wrapped around his bare waist and he lifted his head to look around his room. Had he really fallen asleep beside Katniss, after they'd pleasured one another? Or had that just been a dream? It wasn't the first time, he thought, waking up from one of those lovely dreams. But his pillow smelled like her and the sheets…no the sheets smelled like her. And him. And what they'd done. He knew Katniss was not ready for sex…but he cherished this feeling that was swelling inside his chest. The was she'd taken care of him last night and how she'd trusted him…the sound of his name on her lips. Oh he would never forget that.

Deciding he had better get up and get a shower, he wrapped the sheet around his waist and headed into the bathroom. Katniss let out a little scream, and his hand went to his chest.

"Katniss! You scared me!"

"You scared me! What are you doing?"

"I was coming to take a shower. What are you doing?" He then noticed she held a pair of scissors…and her hair was wet.

"Katniss?"

"It's a tradition for young women in 12," she explained. "When you become a bride, you cut your hair short. To signify that you are married and that you have…become a woman. I know we haven't…I mean, last night…we didn't…" her face turned bright red and she cleared her throat. "But I'm a wife now and have to cut it."

"Who says you have to cut it? That sounds like a silly old wives tale to me." She shrugged but he crossed over to her and took the scissors from her hands.

"Please don't cut your hair. The entire district saw us dancing together last night. They know we are married. You don't have to cut your hair to show you are a bride."

"It means that much to you?"

He lifted a few strands between his fingers and allowed them to slide through his hand. He nodded, his eyes bright.

"I love your hair. I mean, I love everything about you but I've always thought your hair is beautiful. Keep it long. For me."

She shrugged but secretly was grateful. She liked her hair long and felt comfortable with her signature braid. He ran his hand through the lengths and sighed.

"Will you teach me how to braid?"

"You want to learn to braid my hair?" He shrugged but still wore that sweet smile. "Ok. Here, use both hands."

"Ah." He glanced down at where he held the sheet around his waist and blushed. "Let me just put something on."

He hurried out to the room and pulled on a pair of shorts. It's not like we haven't seen each other, he reminded himself as he rolled his eyes. But then, he didn't want to push it. Too much too fast could truly push her away. And he was getting the chance if a lifetime, being with her. He could wait.

* * *

Bare-chested and glowing, he made his way back to Katniss and she avoided looking at his built form. Last night had been a completely new experience for her and not at all unpleasant. She'd never wanted to see a naked man before but looking at Peeta, she felt herself grow very warm and a tingling sensation coursed through her.

"OK, what do I do?"

"Separate the hair into three sections." She faced the mirror while he stood behind her, following her instructions. He was a fast learner and she brought her braid around to the side.

"Not bad. You learn quick."

"I stared at the back of your head a lot," he laughed. Her eyes met his in the mirror and she studied their reflections for a moment. She brought his arms to wrap around her and he pressed his chest to her back.

"Any regrets," he whispered in her ear. She shivered and shook her head.

"Me neither."

"Did you mean what you said?" He raised a brow and she turned to face him.

"About me being the only one? Was that true?"

"I won't lie to you and say I'm completely innocent, Katniss. We, uh, visited brothels and messed around. I've done stuff… but I never went all the way…despite my brother's constant teasing. That's something I believe should only occur when two people love each other. Sex shouldn't be taken lightly." She blushed brilliantly at the word sex and he quirked his brow.

"You're still so pure, Katniss."

"How can you call me pure, after last night?" His smile faltered.

"I didn't mean it as a bad thing. For me, you're perfect."

"You're not…disgusted then?" His brow furrowed.

"Why in the world would I be disgusted?"

"Because you know that someone else has…touched me..." His smile faded completely and his face hardened. Katniss found she did not like seeing that look on him.

"I will do everything I can to wipe every memory of that monster from your brain. He will never touch you again. No one will. I'll kill anyone who tries." She wanted to wipe that pain from his face. She wanted to kiss that worry from his brow and she wanted his eyes to brighten to their beautiful blue. She quickly wrapped her arms around his neck and nuzzled his cheek.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "Forget I mentioned it. You are the only one I want... to touch me." He sighed and wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.

"Never doubt how much you mean to me, Katniss."

"You're being so patient with me, Peeta. I just need…a little more time."

"You don't need to do anything. I told you that," he shook his head. "I would never force you-"

"I know," she assured him. "But please know…I want to. I want everything with you, Peeta. Only you." He tried not to let her words affect him but damn it all to hell, she was pressed tightly against him and the thought of being inside her made his cock swell. He tried to back away, tearing his lower half from hers but she tightened her grip on him.

"I only have one request."

"Name it."

"Let me stay with you." He frowned and opened his mouth uncertainly. "I don't want to stay in another bedroom. I like sleeping beside you. I like waking up beside you. Please let me stay with you."

"Katniss I would love nothing more than to wake up with you in my arms,every morning, for the rest of my life." She nodded and leaned her head against his chest. Swallowing heavily,he wrapped his arms around her and rested his chin on her head.

"As long as you know I never expected any of this to happen. And if you decide, at any time, that anything is too much, know that you just need to tell me. I want you to be happy. Whatever that may entail."

"And as long as you know that I have never wanted this to happen with anyone, until last night." He swallowed, his chin dipping as he stroked her cheek.

"Um, well...I'd better get a shower."

"I'll let you..." she shuffled around him, blushing. "Yeah."

"Yeah, thanks." He cleared his throat and she hurried out of the She smiled as she leaned against the door, remembering last night. She shook her head and moved to sit on the bed. What was wrong with her? Why did all common sense fly out the window when she thought of Peeta?

The door opened shortly after and Peeta walked out with a towel around his waist. Katniss's eyes locked on his bare chest and she swallowed as her eyes followed droplets of water, dripping past the edge of the towel.

"See something you like?" His tone was teasing but she jumped and blushed.

"Um. What do we have planned today? You. What do you have planned today?"

"Well we typically have several days to, ah, enjoy...married life. Um, a honeymoon period, they call it in the Capitol. To...go somewhere and spend time together." He coughed and blushed. "But, um...what would you like to do?"

She had a sudden desire to take him into the woods, to show him where she spent most of her years growing up, struggling to survive.  
But he was a Peacekeeper. Employed by the Capitol, by the President, the very man who kept her and her district so oppressed.  
So she shrugged and shook her head.

"I don't really know. I never spent a lot of time thinking about fun things to do with my time. You know, since I was fighting for survival and all." He blushed even harder.

"Right. Sorry. Um, well we could...go visit your mother and sister. Perhaps have a picnic?" Her brow furrowed and he coughed again.  
"Or you could go see them without me. I mean, we don't HAVE to spend the day together, I just thought it would be nice but if you wa-mmph." She crushed her lips to his and his rambling was cut short. His hand came up to rest on her face as they both relaxed into the kiss. It felt natural. It felt right.

"I like the idea of a picnic," she said softly. "But can it just be the two of us?" His eyes widened but then a broad smile crossed his face.

"If you're sure that's what you want...I would absolutely love that."

"Then let's do it. Where can we go though? District 12 doesn't exactly have lots of great picnic spots."

"I know of a place. Let me get dressed and we can make lunch." She nodded and he kissed her forehead before moving toward the closet. She wasn't sure what she was supposed to do...was she supposed to sit on the edge of the bed and talk to him, like she and Prim did when they were getting ready for the day? Was she supposed to wait in the kitchen by herself? Marriage complicated things, she scoffed to herself. But Peeta made up her mind for her.

"So did you sleep alright," he called from the closet. She played with a design in the sheets and nodded to herself.

"Yeah, really well. To be honest, I've never slept alone. I mean I share the bed with Prim at home so I probably wouldn't do well with having my own room."

"That's fine. But I still want to set up that bedroom for you, in case you ever need some time to yourself. I've sort of started to decorate it but like I said, you're welcome to do with it as you please." He came out, pulling a shirt over his head. Katniss stared at the pale midriff that showed until he tugged his shirt down. She found that she loved that trail of blonde hair on his stomach. What an odd thing to appreciate, she scolded herself again. He looked so carefree in tan shorts and his fitted blue shirt.

"Want to help me with lunch?"

"Not sure how much help I'll be unless you need help eating. Then I'm your girl." He chuckled as he tugged her into the kitchen and opened the fridge.

"I could make some cheesebuns. They don't take very long to make."

She nodded eagerly, sitting at the counter and watching him move around the  
kitchen, noting the intense look of concentration he got when he was  
kneading dough.

"You make it look so easy," she broke the silence. He glanced up at her and laughed.

"I guess when you grow up in a bakery, it becomes second nature." He slid the tray into the oven, then turned back to the counter to finish making the rest of their lunch.

"Ok I feel useless. What can I do to help?"

"It's ok, Katniss," he laughed. "Just sit there and keep me company."

"I'm terrible company."

"Now that's not true at all. If you feel really inclined, tell me a story."

"A story? What about?" He shrugged as he licked his thumb to keep the honey from dripping down his hand.

"Whatever you want. Tell me about your sister. Or your favorite subject in school, although I already know it's not math," he shot her a wink. "Or a funny memory you have in the woods. I want to know everything about your life."

"There isn't much to tell," she muttered, rubbing her arm.

"You underestimate yourself. But I get the sense you don't like talking about your past, much."

"Well then why don't you tell me something about yours? Any funny stories from District 2? Did you visit the Capitol?"

"A couple of times. I met President Snow when I was seventeen. Only Rye could see how much I was shaking."

"Is he as terrifying as he seems?"

"Don't repeat this but I thought I was looking at a mutt. His face was so snake-like that I had a hard time looking him in the eye. And of course I had to make a good impression because I came from 12. He already knew who I was and asked to speak to me personally." She frowned as he sliced apples.

"What did he say to you?"

"You know I can't remember the conversation all that well. He was gracious when he welcomed me to the Capitol but he scared me. Like he was sizing me up, figuring out the best way to swallow me whole. And he reeked of perfume. To this day, I can't stand the smell of roses. He smells like he was doused in them."

She shivered, why she didn't exactly know but she already hated the man who ran their country. Hearing that her husband had actually met him did not soothe her.

"Ok, I think I said let's talk about something happy. Your turn. Tell me the happiest day you can remember."

"Ok. Did I ever tell you about how I got Prim's goat?" He shook his head and watched her as he placed apples on the little tartlets he was making. She talked in a low voice and he laughed in all the right spots.

"Wait, was she still wearing the pink ribbon when you took her home?"

"I think so. Why?"

""I'm just trying to get a picture," he said thoughtfully. "I can see why that day made you happy."

"Well, I knew that goat would be a little gold mine," she replied.

"Yes, of course I was referring to that, not the lasting joy you gave the sister you love so much you would marry a stranger," he said, shaking his head. She frowned and was about to answer when he set a tart in front of her.

"Have some breakfast. I need to check on the cheesebuns." She bit into it and her tastebuds were overwhelmed by the sweet honey and the tangy apple. He glanced at her as he pulled the tray from the oven.

"Good?"

"Delicious! Seriously Peeta, if you keep feeding me treats like this, I'm going to gain fifty pounds."

"That wouldn't be such a bad thing," he said softly, his eyes raking over her slim figure. She swallowed the bite of tart and rubbed her stomach self-consciously. The previous night came flooding back to her and she wondered, again, how anyone could find her beautiful. Her eyes locked on his strong arms as he held onto the hot tray and she swallowed.

"Could we take some food over to Prim and Mom before our picnic?"

"Of course. I made extra for them. Oh good, the cheesebuns look perfect. Can you hand me that basket off the top of the fridge?" He was too good for her, she decided. He cared so much about her happiness that he was taking care of her family. Or maybe it was because he was a genuinely good person who cared about people. And that was rare in 12.

She pulled the basket down and watched him wrap up their food and place it in the basket.

"Why don't you grab a blanket from the bed while I wrap these up for your mother and Prim?" She wandered into his bedroom...their bedroom, she corrected herself. Oh that sounds strange. Shaking her head, she  
yanked the blanket from the bed and hurried into the kitchen.


	13. Chapter 13

Prim squealed when they dropped the food off and teased Peeta about where he was taking her sister.

"Primrose," their mother sighed in exasperation.

"What? I'm being an annoying little sister, like I'm supposed to be!"

"You're already an annoying little sister to me," Katniss kissed her forehead. "You don't need to bug Peeta too."

"I've never had a brother," Prim protested.

"Don't worry, Prim. You can bug me as much as you want." She giggled and nudged him in the side and Katniss quirked a brow. Prim was known for her sweetness around the district; everyone loved her, and much like Peeta, she was always cheerful and smiling.

* * *

"You're so good with her," she muttered after they had left. He held out his arm and she took it, smiling.

"I always wanted a sister. And Prim is a sweetheart."

"Take her then." He chuckled and shook his head.

"Something tells me you don't mean that."

"Well, I would rather a sister than a brother."

"Try two brothers. Older brothers."

"No thanks." He laughed and squeezed her hand. He led her through the district and this time, Katniss ignored the whispers and stares. She even stood on her tiptoes to kiss his cheek at one point. Peeta's eyes sparkled as he laughed, his fingers wrapped around hers.

"Here we are." Katniss smiled as she recognized where he was leading  
her. The meadow lay just outside the fence and her woods lay just a few feet away.

"I wish I could take you inside," she gestured to the woods. "There is a lake in there that's so nice to swim in when it starts to warm up."

"You actually swim in there?"

"My dad taught me," she said softly. "The woods are where I feel close to him."

"Maybe we can find something else to help you feel close to him," he said as he stroked her cheek. "Something less…illegal."

"Dad was a rebel. He sang songs he wasn't supposed to and had books he wasn't supposed to have, and hunted in the all that, he was respected throughout the district."

"And I'm sure his daughter grew up to be just like him," he said with a wink. He spread the blanket out and held out his hand to help her sit. She set the basket down beside her and snuggled against him, her back to his chest. He sucked in a breath as he wrapped his arms around her and kissed her hair.

"I can't tell you how many times I dreamed of this when I was a kid."

"A picnic in the meadow?"

"A picnic in the meadow with you. I kept saying to myself, I would ask you... but every time I was going to, you were with Gale and I lost my nerve and I just... I wasted a lot of time just thinking about it."

She held his hand in front of her face and studied his long fingers.

"So if this hadn't happened...if you hadn't purchased me...would we still be here?"

"I'd like to think we would be. I was coming home with every intention of asking you to marry me anyway."

"But only because you were a Peacekeeper. If that hadn't happened...would you have found the courage to talk to me?" He swallowed and rested his chin on her head.

"I'd like to say yes. I'd like to think I'm braver than I am. But I'm not really sure. I've always been a coward."

"Is that you thinking that about yourself or is that your mother's voice in your head?" He was still and she tilted her head back so she could see him.

"I...I don't know."

"The next time you hear her inside your head, telling you something mean, imagine my voice instead."

"And what is your voice telling me?"

"That you are strong and handsome and wonderful. And I'm lucky to be married to you." She felt his arms tremble and he hid his face in her hair for a moment. When he lifted his head again, she swore she felt something wet on her neck.

"I'm the lucky one," he said thickly, his voice choked with emotion.

* * *

The afternoon was pleasant; Katniss had never had the freedom to just sit in the meadow and talk. With Gale, she was hunting for food for both of their families. With Prim, they worried about their schoolwork and rarely gossiped.  
She found it easy to talk to Peeta. He was genuinely interested in her life and what she had to say. He was soft-spoken but passionate, and his speech was articulate and he painted beautiful words. After they finished their meal, she stretched out with her head in his lap while he braided flowers into her hair. She closed her eyes, lost in the feel of his fingers running through her locks and his deep, soothing voice. He told her about growing up in a bakery, living with two older brothers, what it was like going to District 2 and how he felt being back in 12.

She hadn't realized she had fallen asleep until she felt his lips on her forehead.

"Hey," he said softly, stroking her cheek with his finger. Her eyes fluttered open and she noticed how long and golden his eyelashes looked.

"I didn't think you'd want to miss it," he gestured toward the setting sun. Katniss sucked in a breath as she sat up against him; it was truly spectacular, with blazing orange and yellow and even some reds mixed in.

"I wish I had my paint set," he whispered in awe.

"Do you have one at home?"

"Not really. Paints are hard to come by, unless you're in the Capitol."

"I bet I can make you some. With the berries I find out here." He cupped her chin and forced her to turn to look at him.

"You are too good to me, Katniss." She shook her head and leaned back. Paints were so small compared to everything he had done for her. When she mentioned this, he brushed his knuckles against her cheek.

"I was just doing the right thing. And it wasn't a completely selfless act. I did want you, afterall."

"Darius said he knew you wouldn't want to buy me but that you would, to keep someone else from doing it."

"Well, he's right. I can't imagine anyone… and knowing that… I mean…" he trailed off and she leaned in to kiss him.

"I'm happy it was you." He bit his lip for a moment as both hands held her face, his eyes searching for something. He surged forward with no warning, his lips claiming hers and her hands came up to cover his. He angled his head to deepen the kiss, their tongues meeting with ferocity. He broke away with a gasp, panting her name while his eyes were squeezed shut.

"I'm sorry, I just… lost control for a moment", he sighed.

"Peeta." His eyes opened and held her gaze for a moment.

"It's starting to get a little chilly. Come." He stood and helped her to her feet. She watched him as he gathered the picnic supplies and blanket, shifting from side to side as she waited to see if he would take her hand. She sighed with relief when his fingers wrapped around hers and she followed him out if the meadow.

As they approached their home, they saw Darius and his partner Purnia standing at the edge of the yard, and Peeta nodded to both of them.

"Lieutenant," Purnia said in a low voice.

"Good evening, Darius. Purnia. Is there a problem?"

"Sir, we answered a call about a disturbance near the peacekeepers' barracks," Darius sounded quite anxious. Peeta's brow furrowed.

"What sort of disturbance? Was anyone hurt?"

"No sir. No one was harmed. It was a matter of vandalism. Just a stupid prank it seems but uh… well…"

"Spit it out, Darius," Peeta snapped impatiently.

"Your house, sir," Darius gestured behind him and Peeta dropped Katniss's hand, rushing toward his house. Katniss's hands covered her mouth, her eyes wide in horror.

Painted across the side of the house were red letters that read "seam slut" and "whore".

* * *

"Darius," Peeta said in a voice so low that it was almost deadly. "Find the culprits responsible for this. I want them strung up at the whipping post so I can deal with them myself."

"We will find them, Lieutenant Mellark." Darius cast Katniss a quick look, though she wasn't sure if it was pity or apology or warning, before he and Purnia hurried away. Peeta had dropped the picnic basket and his hands were clenched by his side. Swallowing, Katniss walked up behind him.

"Peeta," her voice shook but she didn't care. He turned and his eyes glittered angrily.

"I'll take care of this, Katniss."

"No. It was a stupid prank but you don't need to whip them."

"So what would you have me do? Allow them to get away with defacing private property and insulting my wife?"

"I just meant…" she bit her lip, her eyes darting to the ground. It was hard to look at him in that moment. Her sweet husband, the gentle boy with the bread, looked like a different person with flames dancing in his eyes. His brow furrowed and his face morphed by rage, it was almost like someone else was inhabiting his body. Katniss hated it. She wanted the real Peeta back, the one who smiled and laughed and spoke with lovely words.

She moved forward and placed her palm on his cheek. His eyes widened and met hers.

"Just let it go, Peeta. Please?"

"Let it go? But-"

"For me," she cut him off. "Please." His eyes searched hers and they slowly became more clear, his blue irises brightening.

"I can't promise they will go unpunished, Katniss. This is a crime and it's my duty to moderate crime. But I won't take it that far… for you. I won't do anything you don't want me to do." She flung herself in his arms and he held on, sighing as he rested his chin on her head.

"What are you doing to me, Katniss?"

"Reminding you of who you really are. You're good, Peeta, and kind and generous. You're not this cold figure the Capitol has twisted into some kind of-" she broke off with a gasp, flying backwards out of his arms. He stared at her, his expression unreadable in the dark.

"Let's get inside. I expect you're hungry

* * *

 _ **so to my reader who commented that it seems like things are going a little too well, good call. You guys have already commented on Peeta's darker moments. Don' worry; Peeta is my favorite character so I'm not about to make him a different person but in the next few chapters you'l see some of his memories from training and maybe understand a little better what had happened to him. Don' hate me yet ;)**_

 _ **Xoxo**_


	14. Chapter 14

In truth, Katniss didn't have much of an appetite but she muttered her thanks when he set a plate in front of her, and the evening was filled with forced conversation. When Peeta suggested they retire for the evening, she practically skipped ahead of him to close herself in the bathroom. Peeta heaved a deep sigh and shook his head.

Great. She doesn't even want to be in the same room as you.

You're a monster.

You're a Capitol Mutt, several women had snarled at him.

He was starting to believe it was true.

There was a darkness that had been implanted in him, which made him a fine peacekeeper. True, he did it all so he could get back to protect the woman he loved but that didn't wipe him clean of all his sins.

He sat on the edge of the bed, his face hidden in his hands. He started when he heard the door opened and Katniss kept her face lowered.

"All yours," she muttered as she dove beneath the covers. Sighing, he grabbed his pajamas and slammed the bathroom door behind him, wincing when it slammed harder than necessary.

Peeta gripped the edge of the sink and stared into the mirror. He knew he had changed. From the first day of training in 2, he wondered if anyone would even recognize him, should he ever return to 12.

Would he recognize himself?

Darkness swirled in his bright eyes and he hastily splashed some water on his face. He wanted to be the man Katniss thought him to be. All his life he had been thinking of how to be good enough for her.

Would he ever be?

He frowned at his reflection before brushing his teeth and changing for bed.

Katniss lay still, facing the wall as she listened to the running water in the bathroom. Who had painted those words? And what would happen to them once they were discovered? Would Peeta go easy on them, just because she had asked it of him?

What had they done to him in training? She wanted to know but didn't want to ask. She had caught flashes of the haunted look in his eyes that told her he had seen horrors. That look faded when he smiled, and she racked her brain for ways to make sure he always smiled from now on.

When he finally exited the bathroom, she was still lost for words so she said nothing as she slid into bed behind her.

"Katniss?" His voice was soft, almost hesitant, but she pretended to be asleep. Sighing, he left a soft kiss on her cheek before he turned to face the opposite side. Their backs barely touched and she felt cold surround her. She wanted to feel his warmth around her, wanted to ask him to hold her but his words from earlier still echoed in her head. It was clear Peeta had another side to him, a side she wasn't sure she wanted to see. She'd had glimpses but she couldn't imagine Peeta losing his temper completely. Yelling at his mother and threatening the unknown vandals had been just a glance, she thought. Would Peeta ever become something else entirely? And would she be able to pull him back for it, or would she lose him? Grimacing at her own dark thoughts, she repositioned her head and tried to find sleep.

Peeta woke several times in the night, his heart racing quickly and droplets of sweat dampening his hairline. He flipped over to his back and stared at the ceiling. Screams of terror, mothers' pleading cries, gunshots… they echoed in his head and he roughly hit himself to be rid of the nightmares. Huffing, he threw the covers aside before he remembered his wife slept by his side. He cast her a startled look but sighed when he saw she was sleeping peacefully. He bit his lip as he slipped from the bed and over to his bag that held his sketchbook. He flipped the lamp on, and propped the book on his knees, his hand flying across the page.

The meadow was starting to come to life when she shifted beside him. His pencil froze and he chewed his lip. When she was still again, he continued his drawing.

A smile crossed his face as he drew her with her head in his lap; he remembered how her hair felt in his fingers and the warmth of her lips when he paused his sentence to lean down for a kiss.

"You look happy," a sleepy voice jerked him from his thoughts.

"I didn't wake you, did I," he asked worriedly. She sat up beside him, shaking her head.

"I wake up at night a lot. Nightmares about my dad mostly. What are you working on?"

"Just sketching," he shrugged dismissively.

"Well whatever it is, is making you mighty happy." She held out her hand and he stared at her, before handing the book over. She propped it on her knees and flipped to the page he had been working on. She smiled at the drawing then looked back at him.

"I really enjoyed today," she said softly, her eyes meeting his.

"Me too," he nodded. She turned her attention back to the sketch book and thumbed the pages.

"May I?" He was wary. He rarely let anyone see his drawings. He felt like someone was looking straight into his soul.

But he always felt like that with Katniss. So he nodded and leaned against the wall.

Katniss studied the intricate flowers, the sketches of delicate hands, various plants, pairs of eyes that were shaded in.

She went in no particular order and Peeta was starting to drift off to sleep when a sharp gasp made him jump. One of her hands was clapped over her mouth as she took in the drawing.

A burning district. People running. Their mouths opened in silent screams. Bodies strewn on the ground. Peacekeepers in stiff uniforms standing over the bodies with guns. Peeta shifted and tried to close the book.

"I have to draw my nightmares, Katniss, else they just continue to haunt me. Drawing them makes it a little easier to deal with them."

"What is this?" He didn't want to tell her. Didn't want her to look at him like a monster. Too late, he thought bitterly. How can she love me when she doesn't even know about my past? About everything I've done?

And… how could she ever love me once she knows?

"Peeta?"

"We got a call from an operative outside of District 11. There was an… an uprising, throughout the district. The Minister of Security instructed us to see to it that all rebellious activity was squashed. I had just turned 17 and… I still have nightmares about the screams." He squeezed his eyes shut and ran his hand through his hair.

"I remember… when we got back to 2… I cried into my pillow. Rye comforted me and… I think he was pretty shaken up too. We had never killed before. And some of the rebels… they were just kids, Katniss! Children who just wanted a fair chance at life. And I took that chance away. With one shot in the head, it was over. Because I was a loyal soldier to President Snow, I was forced to murder children." He blinked back tears but Katniss could still see his cheeks were wet, even in the dark. She snuggled into his side and pressed her cheek against his hammering heart.

"I'm not who you think I am," he said in a shaky voice. "I'm not as good as you think. I've done...terrible things. All for the good of Panem, so they say. But I am not the gentle boy you remember. I wish I could be… but too much has changed. And I'm terrified of disappointing you but I know it's bound to happen. You'll see me doing my duty and you'll be disgusted with me. You'll leave me and I'll-"

"Peeta." She sat in front of him, nearly straddling him, and held his face in her hands.

"No one else can choose your path for you. You choose that yourself. Your actions lead you to who you become. And maybe you have done some bad things… but that doesn't make you a bad person. I know your heart, Peeta. You fed me when we were kids. You saved me from being used. Your heart… your heart is what matters. And that goodness inside you… it doesn't just go away. Some of that darkness may try to put out the light but that light… it's what I love about you. The light in your eyes, it tells me you ARE a good person." Her hand moved up to his hair and he closed his eyes as he leaned into her palm.

"I'm not leaving you, Peeta. So don't try to drive me away."

"I won't. I just don't want you to be saddled with a mutt for a husband."

"I'm getting tired of that kind of talk," she said testily. "You have to promise me, right now, that you will believe me when I say you have a good heart." Peeta couldn't help but smile.

"Ok. I promise. And you have to promise to believe me when I tell you how incredible you are."

"One step at a time," she muttered, moving off of him and leaning against the headboard. Peeta reached over and set the sketch book back in her hands.

"Maybe it will help you… to see through my eyes. How I see you." She gave him a puzzled frown before she flipped the book open.

It was her but it wasn't. The drawing was majestic, beautiful even. Katniss had never looked like that. And she was wearing her dad's hunting jacket with her bow over her shoulder. A regular day for her. Why then, had he drawn her looking so… magnificent?

"This isn't me."

"That's incorrect, as I don't know many dark-haired huntresses in 12."

"But I'm… you've drawn me… you made me beautiful."

"I didn't make you anything, Katniss. I have always found you alluring. There is an ethereal mystery about you that makes you the most stunning creature ever created." Katniss tapped the page with her thumb.

"How do you do that?"

"Do what?"

"Paint colorful pictures with just your words." He turned to face her and cupped her chin gently.

"You just make it that easy."

"Stop," she laughed. "You're starting to sound like that Victor from 4."

"Oh if you're comparing me to Finnick Odair, I must be doing alright. Everyone adores him in the Capitol."

"Mmhm, I'm sure. Quite a peacock, from what I've seen. What with his glittering jewels and the lovely women at his side."

"What, you don't fancy a Capitol lifestyle? Glittering jewels and more money than you'd know what to do with?"

"I would settle for a full meal every day and some new clothes for Prim." His teasing smile faded and he nodded slowly.

"Of course. Katniss, I was only-"

"I imagine it would be so easy for the Capitol to lure you into their ways." His brow furrowed.

"What do you...why would you say that?"

"Because you have a weakness for beautiful things. You'd be lost completely, I imagine." Peeta's nostrils flared and a dark look crossed over his face.

"Having an eye for beauty isn't the same thing as weakness, Katniss. Except possibly when it comes to you."

"What does that-"

"It's late," he said loudly, turning to set the book beside his lamp. "You should sleep." She stared at him and threw up her hands.

"Are you going to do this every time? Shut me out?"

"I'm trying not to, Katniss, but you obviously have this perceived notion about me that is actually quite untrue."

"Then why am I here? Hm?" He sat up to face her and she crossed her arms.

"Why am I staying here, if you're not going to talk to me?"

"What do you call what we have been doing for the past hour? What more can I tell you?"

"Tell me why you keep putting up walls around me. Why you seem bound and determined to chase me away. Tell me why you won't let me into your heart!" There was a tense silence that sliced at them both. Peeta actually winced.

"Have you let me into yours, Katniss?" She gasped and tightened her arms over her chest, as if guarding the topic of conversation. Her action made his shoulders sag.

"That's what I thought. Good night, Katniss."

"Peeta wait-" her hand flew to his arm and he paused momentarily.

"I want to," she said in the smallest voice. "I want to let you in… but I'm scared. I've never… needed anyone like that before. And my sister has always been the most important thing in my life. Letting someone else in, sharing room with her, it's… it's hard. But," she sucked in a breath and squeezed his arm. "I want to try. Really. I want you to love me."

"I already do, Katniss. I always have."

"And I didn't know that until you told me. You have a fourteen year head start on me. Can't you give me some time to catch up… and actually let me get to know you? Stop looking so wounded when I say something you disagree with. Married people talk. About their problems, their hopes, their dreams, their nightmares. Let's get to know each other and see what happens." His blue eyes were dark and swirling with uncertainty so Katniss didn't know what he was feeling.

"You're right," he finally said. He leaned forward and pressed his forehead against hers. "God Katniss, you're so right. I'm so sorry. My brothers tried to tell me… but I guess I don't really know what a successful marriage is. As you can probably guess, my parents didn't exactly marry for love. I suppose they like and respect one another but I have never seen them show any kind of affection. And I can't imagine my mother sharing her hopes and dreams. With anyone."

"My parents were so in love," she said softly and he opened his eyes to look at her again. "When my dad died… I thought Mom would follow him in death. I said I never wanted to find a love like that. Something that could destroy me if I ever lost yo- that person." He stroked her cheek and squeezed his eyes shut.

"I'll try to open my heart to you, if you can try to open yours to me. And if you need time to do that, then that's fine. I told you when I first showed you the contract that all I ask is friendship."

"But that's not all you want," she protested. "You hope I will fall in love with you."

"Katniss, I-"

"And I know I feel something for you...something strong. So just give me some time to figure it out. And don't chase me away or shut me out. I get that you're protecting your heart but if you keep it guarded, how am I supposed to find my way there?" Peeta didn't know what to say to that but he feared she could hear how loudly his heart was beating in his chest. He yanked her forward to kiss her and it knocked both of them senseless. When he pulled away, she silently pulled him down to the pillows and curled up in his embrace.

"I enjoyed today," she mumbled. "And I'd like to do that more often. Just talk and get to know each other." He rested his chin on her hair, his fingers making gentle patterns across her back, as he found peaceful sleep rather quickly.

* * *

 _ **two for one! ;) I just wrote several new chapters tonight so thought I would post another one :) I'm actually quite fond of this one cause it's a rare glimpse of Katniss putting her feelings out there. Hope you enjoyed and have a great weekend!**_

 _ **Xoxo**_


	15. Chapter 15

The next day, Peeta's internal clock woke him early again and he sighed as he glanced over at his sleeping wife. He would love to just sleep in with her, maybe even please her when she woke up, if she was alright with that. But his body told him it was time to get up, so he made his way to the bathroom before going into the kitchen to start on breakfast.

He was interrupted by a soft knock and he was surprised to see several peacekeepers on his porch.

"Yes," he asked, keeping his voice low.

"We just wanted to let you know we are here, Lieutenant, so that you're not surprised. We are going to get this cleaned up for you." The boy gestured toward the words on the wall and Peeta nodded.

"Thank you. I'll bring you all some water while you work." He returned to the kitchen and took a tray of water outside. He watched as they scrubbed the paint away and Purnia glanced sideways at him.

"We will find whoever did this, sir."

"I know. My wife isn't as upset as I am about this but I need to make an example of them. This sort of transgression can't go unpunished."

"To be honest, sir, Commander Cray says they can be shot on sight." Peeta froze and felt sick.

"No. It's vandalism, not murder. Why would Commander Cray give those orders?"

"Permission to speak freely, Lieutenant?" He glanced at the boys beside her and nodded.

"I believe the Capitol wants to crack down on the outlying districts. 10, 11, and 12. I've heard tell that the Minister of Security believes Commander Cray to be too lenient. He might be replaced soon."

"Replaced? By whom?"

"No one is certain but it's possible that Commander Romulus Thread will be coming here." Peeta's eyes widened and he paled quickly. He had met Thread only once but heard stories about the man's cruelty. He made Cray look like a sweet old man.

"Let us hope that's not the case," Peeta whispered. The boy beside Purnia shuddered.

"We will all be shot if that is the case."

"Straighten up, soldier," Peeta said sternly. "We are here to keep order in the districts and to serve President Snow. If Commander Cray is replaced, we will adapt. Do not ask questions, do not refuse orders."

"Yes Lieutenant Mellark," the boy said quickly, scrubbing harder. Purnia shook her head.

"Apologies for the intrusion, Lieutenant. Once we have this mess cleaned, we will be off and continue our search for the culprit." Peeta nodded once and returned to his kitchen. He braced his hands on the counter and breathed deeply, before gathering the ingredients he would need. Baking and cooking had always made him feel better and he wanted to make something delicious for Katniss. So he pushed the wall from his mind and set to work.

* * *

Katniss entered the room just as he was flipping the pancakes, sleepily rubbing at her eyes.

"Good morning," he said cheerfully. "Sleep alright?"

"I did," she looked around and Peeta raised a brow, knowing she was looking for something to do.

"I was about to make some tea for us."

"I'll do it," she said immediately and he smiled. She glanced at the pan as she set the kettle down beside it.

"What are you making?"

"Pancakes. Ever tasted them?" She shook her head and Peeta's eyes widened. He shouldn't be surprised but pancakes were his favorite breakfast. His father had made them on special occasions, such as his son's birthday.

"I like to put a fruit on top of them. Would you prefer strawberries or blueberries?"

"Oh, strawberries please."

"Good choice." She stood beside him, pouring the tea into two mugs, while he moved around her to cut up the fruit. They worked well in the kitchen and they hadn't done this but a few times. Peeta set a plate in front of her and kissed her hair quickly before turning back to the stove.

"Do you have to go back to work today?"

"Tomorrow," he glanced up at her as he scooped more pancakes into the plate. "I thought we could invite our families over for dinner tonight."

"That sounds nice. Maybe another picnic in the meadow today?"

"If that's what you want, then that's what we will do." She lifted her fork to her lips and gasped.

"Peeta! This is so good!"

"I'm glad you like them. The flour is a little hard to come by but peacekeepers are kept well supplied. I was planning to give most of it to Dad for the bakery. He uses it for everything."

"What do you think we should make for dinner?" He knew he needed to visit the market for more groceries. He loved cooking for Katniss but he was used to providing for one person, not two.

"I might be able to buy some beef from the butcher." Katniss hadn't seen Rooba, the butcher, in quite some time. It had been awhile since her last hunt in the woods. She was about to speak but a loud thunk made her jump.

"What was-"

"It's ok. Purnia brought some peacekeepers over to clean up the wall."

"Oh." Those words had kept her awake all night. She hoped it hadn't been someone she knew. Even if it was some stupid joke, it hurt and absolutely wasn't true. Of course, she could imagine what was being said about her. Going from Cray's house to Peeta's… being seen with three different Peacekeepers. She suddenly wasn't so hungry and simply pushed the strawberries around her plate.

"Let's get dressed and we can go to the butcher. Maybe we can get something for our picnic in town too." She nodded and hurriedly dressed.

When they opened the door, however, it was pouring rain and the wind nearly blew the door closed on them.

"Well," Peeta sighed. "I suppose the picnic is out."

"This could last all day. Maybe we had better postpone dinner. That thunder sounds close and it's not safe to walk through the district." Peeta nodded in agreement and they slipped back inside.

* * *

Even though they couldn't go outside, they were both content with how the day went. Peeta taught Katniss a couple of card games before he made them a hearty stew for lunch. Katniss hungrily tore into the thick bread he had baked and dipped it into her stew. They quietly talked for hours as they ate and cleaned up.

Peeta opened the front door so they could listen to the rain, and they both slid down into the floor across from each other. They fell into a comfortable silence as they watched the storm clouds drift by.

By nightfall, the rain had still not stopped and Katniss pushed the windows open so they could continue to listen to the storm. Peeta was about to suggest dinner when the room was plunged into darkness.

"Peeta?"

"I'm here. Damn, a power outage." Katniss, who had grown up in the Seam where there was no power after dark anyway, quickly found her way to the counter and fumbled around for a candle and a match. Her hunter skills heightened, she blinked in the darkness and made her way over to him.

"Holy shit," he exclaimed when she touched his arm.

"Relax," she giggled. "It's just me."

"You're even more intimidating in the dark," he chuckled.

"Do you have more candles?" The match struck and her face appeared in the soft glow.

"Yeah. I think there's some in the bathroom. Not all of my boxes are unpacked but there should be another one in my room."

"Ok I'll get them. You stay here."

"But- wait- ow!"

"Stay here and don't kill yourself," she laughed, carrying the candle with her.

"Katniss?"

"I'll be right back," she called from the bathroom. She grabbed a smaller candle and ran into the bedroom.

"Katniss. Please hurry." She was startled to hear how panic-stricken he sounded. She grabbed the two candles and made her way back to him. He let out a sigh of relief when he saw her coming back.

"I'm here," she said soothingly. "I'm right here."

"You must think I'm a huge coward," he said miserably as she lit the other candles.

"No I don't. Why would I?"

"Because what kind of peacekeeper is afraid of the dark?"

"The kind that- wait. You're afraid of the dark?" She held the candle to his face and he winced.

"More like being alone in the dark. It was… one of our tests. During training." She didn't say anything and he sighed.

"They wanted to determine strengths and weaknesses. They put four of us in a house and shut off the power. Then they isolated us so we couldn't help each other through the house. I was locked in a small room by myself for 2 days. I couldn't see but I heard the rats scurrying in the dark and I could hear the screams from my cohorts. When they let us out, two of them had gone insane. I don't really...like to be in complete darkness anymore, after that."

"The bedroom is a bit more lit, by the moon. Come on." She wrapped her fingers around his and he followed her down the hall, clutching his candle with sweaty hands. The moonlight streamed in through the window so Peeta could actually see a path. Katniss set the candle down beside the bed and took Peeta's to do the same. She pulled him into her arms and held him close, her head resting over his heart. His strong arms closed around her, sighing as he felt her bury her face in his chest.

"I'll try to keep you safe," she whispered, "and I won't let anything happen to you."

"That's my job," he replied just as quietly. She looked up at him, her eyes as silver as the moon.

"We protect each other." Peeta's hand moved to cup her cheek while he leaned down to kiss her. Her hand moved to his hair to hold him in place as her tongue moved against his. Peeta groaned softly, pushing her backwards toward the bed; he fell over her, trapping her in his embrace. With shaking hands, she pulled at his shirt and he quickly pulled it over his head and tossed it aside. He drew a sharp breath as her palms covered his bare shoulders and made their way down his chest. He kissed her again, his hand cupping her breast over her shirt. Impatiently, she pulled his hand under her shirt and over her covered globe. Peeta chuckled softly against her lips, loving that she was commanding and ready to take charge.

He moved his lips down her throat and paused to push her shirt up to her chin. She sat up and raised her hands in the air; smiling, Peeta slipped the shirt over her head and leaned in to kiss her shoulder. His hands moved to cup her breasts and he gently nipped at her neck.

"Peeta," she breathed and he lowered his head to suck at her nipple through the cotton. Glancing up at her for a moment, he gripped both sides of her bra and tugged upward, waiting to see of she would stop him. When she didn't, he pulled it off and flung it across the room, his lips reacquainting themselves with her hardened nipple. She threw her head back and moaned his name, her fingers curling around his hair. While he twisted and tweaked her nipple with one hand, his other moved to the waistband of her worn pants.

His kisses trailed down her stomach and he tugged her pants down her legs. He looked to her again for any signs of discomfort but found none. He used his elbows to spread her legs wider and she let out a strangled gasp as he trailed his tongue across her panties.

"You're already so wet," he said in a husky voice that made her shiver.

"I'm-what?"

"This," he moved his fingers past her panties and across her folds. He moaned as if he was in pain. "This means you like what I'm doing. That you want me. And that you want more." He withdrew his fingers and popped them into his mouth. Katniss bit her lip and shifted on the bed.

"Peeta, please." She didn't know how to ask him but she wanted him to do what he had done the other night. She had never known such pleasure in her life!

Luckily Peeta knew what she was asking.

He tugged her to the edge of the bed and knelt before her. He draped her legs over his shoulders and she sat up on her elbows. He was bathed in moonlight and his blonde curls looked to be streaked with silver. His toned arms and chest seemed to glow and she bit her lip. He caught the action and paused.

"You still ok?"

"Mmhm." He sat up to kiss her before kneeling back down.

"Eyes on me, Katniss," he said in a low tone. His gaze locked on hers, he flattened his tongue and swiped up to her clit.

"Oh my god," she moaned, reaching down to grip his hair in her fist. It was difficult to watch him but she did her best to keep her eyes open. When he hit that spot, her hips jerked and he brought a hand to her lower stomach.

"Ohhhhh! Peeta!"

"God you're beautiful, Katniss. Let go. Let go for me." He closed his lips around her clit and sucked and she flew apart with a scream. He kissed his way up her stomach, her breasts, across her cheeks, her nose, and finally her lips.

"You are very good at that," she panted.

"I shared a room with my brother, and would have to hide in the closet whenever they brought girls home," he said with a smile and a wink as he held himself up over her. "Tried to remember everything. That just makes me sound creepy, doesn't it?" He jumped as her hand gripped him through his pants and she gave him a shy smile.

"A little," she nodded. "But I'm glad you're well-learned."

"Self taught," he winked. "Just don't call me a voyeur."

"I won't, since I don't know what that means."

His laughter died in his throat and his arms became very shaky as she went to work on the button and zipper. Her tongue ran across her lips and he sucked in a breath.

"Oh shit," he muttered as he struggled to hold himself up.

"Why don't you get more comfortable?" She sat up and pushed him down in her place, her hands tugging at his pants.

"K-Katniss… you know you don't have to-"

"Would you believe for once that I'm doing this because I want to," she snapped. He gulped at her fierce expression. "Now sit up."

He lifted his hips and allowed her to slide his pants and underwear down to his ankles. He kicked them off and shivered at her intense stare. He nearly swallowed his tongue as she licked his shaft and gripped him in her small hand.

"Oh fuck," he groaned, his toes curling into the sheets. He wanted to hold on for as long as he could but her mouth, inexperienced as it was, was pure bliss. He had to tell her to cover her teeth once and repositioned her hand so she wouldn't choke but for the most part it was the most incredible thing he had experienced.

"Fuck! Katniss, you have to move. I'm going to- ah! Shit!" He tugged at her braid until she lifted her head and his hips jerked as he let go all over his stomach.

"Sweet mother of Panem," he grunted, throwing his arm over his eyes.

"Why did you stop me?" He lowered his arm and looked sheepish.

"Uh, I thought I had better warn you…I mean, girls...seem to get upset when there's no warning."

"Oh." Her face burned, almost as much as his did. He cleared his throat as he reached for some tissues to clean up with. He tossed them aside and pulled her into his arms.

"Thank you for that." She wanted to tell him she wanted more, that she wanted to go all the way, but she could barely keep her eyes open. Instead, she nodded and nuzzled into his chest, listening to his soft snores and joining him in sleep quickly.

* * *

Peeta had to be at an early peacekeeper meeting but he still had a hard time getting out of bed. Especially since his beautiful wife had fallen asleep naked and she was sleeping on her back with the blanket strewn over one breast, while the other was left exposed. Not being able to help himself, he leaned down to swirl his tongue around her nipple before kissing his way up to her mouth. He could stay here and wake her up in the most delicious way possible. To hell with the meeting.

Sighing, he made himself get up and dress. He made himself some breakfast and set some aside for when Katniss woke.

When he couldn't delay leaving any longer he returned to her side and gently shook her awake.

"Hm, Peeta? You leaving?"

"Yeah, I have to get going," he whispered, stroking her cheek. "I'll be home before dinner. You going to be at your mother's house?"

"Probably," she yawned. "But Madge mentioned when you go back to work that I should go to her house and help her plan her toasting and ceremony."

"Good. Go be gossiping girls and have fun," he kissed her forehead and smiled. "I made some breakfast for you. It's a covered plate on the counter. I'll see you after work."

"Have a good day," she pulled the blanket up to her chin and closed her eyes again. Chuckling softly, he gave her one last sweet kiss before he gathered his things and stepped out onto the porch.

The peacekeepers had done a good job with cleaning the wall. All traces of those hateful words were gone. He was still irritated that they hadn't found whoever was responsible but he was glad the words were gone. He shouldered his bag and headed to Rye's house first. He was keeping his uniform there but knew he would have to bring it home soon.

His brother greeted him cheerfully and they chatted while Peeta changed. They walked to the meeting together, catching each other up on their lives.

"The toasting is set for three days from now. Heaven forbid we don't have finger sandwiches and we can't get the ingredients until Thursday." Rye made a face and threw up his hands, making Peeta snort loudly.

"Why does Madge need finger sandwiches?"

"Oh no. Madge's mother demands the sandwiches. And Dad says it's better so he will have time to make the cake. We want a strawberry chiffon cake and you know how long those take."

"Strawberry chiffon? Really?"

"Hey, I would be fine with plain old chocolate. Madge is used to fancier things. So I'll give my girl what she wants."

"You really are whipped," Peeta winked.

"Oh like you can talk. Bet you've been waiting on Katniss hand and foot since you got married." Peeta shrugged.

"She's had a tough life so the least I can do is make sure she's taken care of now."

"And how are you guys doing," Rye dropped his voice.

"We're good. We're taking your advice and starting slow. Getting to know each other. We had a picnic in the meadow and last night I showed her my sketch book."

"Oh you showed her every drawing you've done of her since you were five," he chortled.

"Asshole. I have multiple sketch books you know. We talked a little… about my nightmares." All traces of mirth vanished from Ryen's face.

"Yeah? Good for you. I still can't really talk about it."

"Madge deserves to know, Rye. It's why I told Katniss. I mean, she doesn't know everything but we're different people than before we left 12. They deserve to know why."

"More power to you, baby bro, but I'll keep my demons buried for as long as I can." Peeta knew better than to argue with his brother and besides, it wasn't his business. Everyone deals with pain in different ways. Rye chose to hide his.

"So did the Mayor talk you into having the toasting at his house?"

"Mom sure wasn't offering the bakery for it. We are going to do it in the evening though because Bing can't close the shop until 5. Dad said he would close the bakery early but I know he needs the business. Bing mentioned this past winter was pretty hard on all of them." They reached the barn where peacekeepers meetings were held and Rye yanked the door open.

"Lieutenant Mellark," someone called and Peeta nodded in acknowledgement.

"Good morning."

"Sir, we have some news." Peeta raised a brow as he waited for the boy to continue. He couldn't be much younger than Peeta but he looked like a scared child at the Reaping.

"Go on."

"Ah, Lieutenant Mellark," someone said lazily. Peeta stiffened and Rye stood straight-backed at his side.

"Commander," he inclined his head.

"We were fortunate enough to catch the party responsible for the vandalism on your property." Rye frowned and glanced sideways at him; Peeta hadn't had a chance to tell him about it. He assumed he would know, from the other peacekeepers but clearly he was wrong.

"You have them in custody?" Cray smiled and stretched out his hand, gesturing to someone beside him. Peeta turned and his eyes widened.

Standing between two burly peacekeepers, was a handcuffed Gale Hawthorne.


	16. Chapter 16

Peeta's throat had gone dry, his palms sweating, and yes, he felt like he might pass out.

His wife's best friend and secret hunting partner glared at him in hatred. Oh he knew Gale hated the fact that Katniss had married him. He knew how Gale felt about merchants, and he imagined peacekeepers weren't too high on his list of favorite people.

"This is the man responsible?" He finally found his voice.

"No," Gale spat. "But these assholes need someone to blame, so here I am!" One of the men hit him with a baton and Gale grimaced but did not make a sound. Peeta frowned and glanced at both peacekeepers.

"What evidence do you have that he is involved?"

"We found red paint outside his house, sir."

"Call the fucking Capitol, everyone with red paint must be dragged to the whipping post," Gale rolled his eyes. The baton made a cracking noise over his shoulders that made Peeta wince.

"Keep your mouth shut, Hawthorne," Peeta said coldly. "Unless you want stripes across your back."

"I don't doubt you would be the one to put them there, Mellark." Damn it, Gale shut up! Peeta tried to give him a warning look but Gale was staring at the ceiling.

"Who is assigned this case?"

"I am, Lieutenant," Darius stepped forward. Thank God, Peeta sighed. Darius was logical and fair. He nodded and set his jaw.

"Alright. Peacekeeper Murphy, you'll come with me to question the culprit. Who made the arrest?"

"I did," snarled a large blonde man with cold blue eyes. Peeta had seen him in 2 but hadn't interacted with him much.

"Very good. You'll join Peacekeeper Murphy and me. I want everyone else to clear out of here after the meeting, understood?" They all nodded and Cray's hands lingered behind his back.

"I'll make this meeting brief. Tomorrow we will have some guests from the Capitol. Do as you're told, do not give them any reason to question our loyalty. District 12 is in enough trouble as it is so I don't need one of my younger Peacekeepers to embarrass me. Is that clear?"

"Yes Commander," they all muttered.

"Off to your duties. Lieutenant Mellark, I'll expect an update when you're finished."

"Of course sir." Cray lumbered out of the barn, the rest of them following behind. It seemed that Cray was drunk; he stumbled the same way Abernathy did. Darius made sure the door was closed before he returned to stand at Peeta's side.

"Right. Peacekeeper Jacobson, you say you made the arrest. Do you have evidence, other than the red paint?"

"Darius and I talked to a few neighbors. Since it was still light out when the incident happened, a couple of people claimed they saw a tall dark man hurrying away from the barracks with a bucket of paint in his hand. Another witness actually named him."

"The witness identified Gale Hawthorne?"

"Yes sir. And when we went to question Hawthorne, we found this bucket and a wet paintbrush thrown into the bushes. We asked his mother if she had seen him last night but she says he was working in the mines. However, the mines close down before sun down. So where was he if he didn't go home to his mama **?"**

"You condescending piece of sh-"

"Hawthorne," Peeta barked. "That's enough. Now why don't you tell me your side of the story?"

"Nothing to tell. I got out of work and stopped by the Hob for a drink, like I do every day."

"Can anyone confirm this?"

"Ripper served me two drinks before I went home." Peeta nodded to Darius, who was scribbling down notes.

"And the paint?"

"Ma wants our house repainted. Paint is damn expensive so I tried to make my own. But our neighbor's cat got into it and it poisoned the animal. So I threw it out, telling Ma I would go buy some from town this week." It sounded true enough but Peeta knew there was something Gale wasn't saying. He could tell when people were lying and right now, he knew Gale wasn't being entirely truthful.

"That doesn't explain why witnesses saw you near the Lieutenant's house."

"Do you know how many times I have been mistaken for another Seam boy, and vice versa? We all look the same in the Seam. It wasn't me they saw."

"Gale, did you have a drink with anyone at the Hob," Darius asked softly.

"Nah. The guys decided to head home. I needed a drink before I went home to three starving siblings and one dying mother." Gale shrugged, the chains at his wrists clinking.

"Look, even if I was stupid enough to vandalize a peacekeeper's house… Katniss is my best friend. Why would I write that shit on her house?"

"You're familiar with the words that were left there?"

"Same words that charming Jacobson here yelled at my baby sister when she tried to stop him from taking me this morning." Jacobson whacked Gale in the head and Peeta stiffened.

"That's enough, Soldier."

"You don't believe a Seam rat, do you? They're all the same, always lying and thieving."

"I said that's enough," Peeta said angrily. "Peacekeeper Murphy, you and Jacobson go to the Hob and ask Ripper if she saw Gale yesterday. I'll question him further, alone." Jacobson looked like he wanted to protest but Darius gave him a look and the two quickly marched from the barn, their guns at their side. Gale glared at Peeta and scoffed.

"Don't think I don't know what you're trying to do here, Mellark."

"And what's that," Peeta replied tiredly.

"You think you have to protect me because of Katniss. Well fuck that. I don't need your protection."

"Great. So you want me to have you beaten so that you're in no condition to provide for your family?" Gale spat on the ground.

"Fuck you. We don't need charity from a peacekeeper. A Merchant peacekeeper."

"Yeah, I know that bothers you a lot. That Katniss chose to marry a Merchant." Gale snorted.

"Chose? She didn't choose you. You forced her to marry you." Peeta's face darkened.

"I would never-"

"She thought she had no other choice but to marry a peacekeeper to keep her family fed. But I could have taken care of her."

"Ohhh so that's it, is It? She rejected your proposal of marriage and married me instead." Gale's face screwed up with rage.

"You Merchants are all the same! You take Seam girls to the Slag Heap, call them sluts, and leave them crying in the street. You'll get tired of Katniss after you've fucked her once or twice, leave her-" his words were cut off as his head flew in the opposite direction. Blood poured from his nose as Peeta flexed his fists.

"You don't know a goddamn thing about me, Hawthorne, so just shut up right now. I don't need to explain myself to you but since you actually care about Katniss, I'll tell you I love her. I have always loved her and everything I've done, has been for her." He took a step back as Gale lifted the back of his hand to his nose.

"Now, you need to get your shit together and tell me the truth, before they come back. I'll do what I can to keep you away from the whipping post. So I'll ask again. Tell me your side of the story."

"Are you deaf? I already told you-"

"I don't believe you. You're hiding something and you need to tell me. You can trust me."

"Like hell I can," Gale scoffed.

"Who are you covering for? Are they really worth it?"

"You've been drinking too much of that Capitol shit. I told you what happened. Simple as that."

"And when Darius talks to Ripper, is she going to say she served you drinks last night?" Both boys were silent.

"Ripper likes me," Gale shrugged as if that settled it.

"Ripper isn't stupid. She works in the black market and needs to keep her head low. Especially since we are about to have new peacekeepers who will start to crack down. The Hob isn't safe. You hunting in the woods isn't safe."

"What's it to you? Why do you care what I do?"

"Because I'll be the one trying to comfort Katniss when you get shot for hunting! Damn it, Gale, she cares about you. So I have to as well. Level with me and tell me the fucking truth."

"I can't." Peeta sighed and watched Gale flex his wrists.

"Can't or won't?"

"Both. Look it was a really stupid prank gone bad. And I was coming over to talk to Katniss, to apologize for being an ass to her, when I saw… I'm not a snitch so I'm not going to tell you who it was. But they've been in enough trouble lately so if they were caught, they would be shot for sure. I took the paint and tried to throw it out. Told them to lie low and if it came down to it, I'd take the blame."

"It was your brother," Peeta said quietly. Gale's eyes flashed and narrowed.

"I never said-"

"Who else would you risk a whipping for? One of your younger brothers got mad at Katniss for marrying me and decided to get back at her. But you caught him, told him to stay quiet, and you tried to dispose of the evidence. Not too well, I might add."

"You're crazy," was all Gale said. But Peeta could see the worry in his eyes. He should have known immediately. He wouldn't let his younger brothers take the fall.

Peeta ran his hands through his hair and drew a deep breath.

"Alright. Here's what we're going to do."

* * *

When Darius and Jacobson returned, Jacobson was wearing an evil smile.

"Lieutenant Mellark, we spoke with the old woman."

"And?"

"Ripper said she never saw Gale Hawthorne in the Hob last night," Darius said quietly. Peeta sighed and nodded.

"Ok. I've already decided I won't press charges. Since it's Hawthorne's first offence, I'll let him off with a warning and-"

"A warning," Jacobson snarled.

"And a fine," Peeta finished, his eyes flashing. "Case closed. Darius, you can escort Hawthorne to the Justice Building to fill out the proper forms."

"Did he confess to it?" They knew the fine would be less if he confessed to the crime but Peeta still couldn't get him to say or write a confession.

"Try again," he said quietly and Darius nodded in understanding. Perhaps Gale would open up more to Darius.

Peeta had told him he would drop the charges but there would still be a fine and that angered Gale. Peeta knew the Hawthornes were poor but that was the best he could do without whipping him or taking him out of work. He had told Gale that he would bring them some food later that day but Gale had spit on the ground and glared.

"We won't take your charity, Mellark."

Maybe Katniss would have more luck. Jacobson turned from Darius to Peeta and shook his head.

"You're just going easy on him because your new wife is one of them!" Darius and Peeta both froze.

"Jacobson," Darius said warningly.

"One of those Seam brats! Seam girls are good for two things, Mellark. One is her mouth. The other is under her-" the peacekeeper went flying into the wall with a yelp and Darius jumped in front of Peeta.

"Peeta, calm down," he implored, holding his hands up. Peeta's eyes were black with rage, his fists clenched by his sides.

"Some Peacekeeper," Jacobson grunted from the floor, his hand stemming the blood from his nose. "Just wait til the new peacekeepers get here tomorrow. You'll wish you hadn't done that, Mellark."

"You want another black eye, Jacobson," Darius growled, his hands on Peeta's shoulders.

"You're dismissed for the day, Jacobson," Peeta said through gritted teeth. "A full day without pay. Report for duty tomorrow." Jacobson gaped at the

peacekeepers.

"You heard our Lieutenant! Get out of here!" Jacobson stumbled to his feet and out of the barn. Peeta took a deep breath and leaned back against the wall.

"Thanks Darius."

"I get it, Peeta. I'm fond of Katniss, and Rosie is from the Seam too. You just have to let it roll off your shoulders. You can't attack your soldiers like that, alright?"

"Yeah," Peeta grunted. "Of course. I know, you're right. I just… lost control."

"I know. Hey. Why don't you take the rest of the day off too? Take Katniss somewhere."

"No, I can't. I've had the past week off and there's too much to do."

"Let your brother take care of the other cases. He's about to have some time off too, so let him cover you for today." Peeta sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Are you sure you guys can handle it?"

"We managed without you for years," he said in a teasing tone. "We will be just fine."

"Alright. I'll fill out the report and take it to Commander Cray. You'll escort Hawthorne to the Justice Building?"

"Of course, sir," Darius fell back into the respectful peacekeeper. He bowed his head and passed his notepad to Peeta.

"Don't mention Jacobson," he muttered. Peeta frowned.

"But-"

"It's his word against the two of us. Don't mention it in your report." Peeta felt a surge of gratitude toward Darius and he nodded.

"I'll see you tomorrow then, Peacekeeper Murphy." Darius gave him a little salute and stepped outside where Gale was waiting. Peeta walked out behind him and saw that Rye was one of the men guarding Gale.

"Officer Mellark, walk with me." Ryen nodded and took his place by his brother's side.

"Be warned, Hawthorne," he said loudly. "You are getting off easy. The next offence will be dealt with in the harshest of manners." Gale glared at him until Darius shoved him onto the road and they headed toward town. Peeta gestured for Ryen to follow him and the two doubled back toward the bakery.

"You going to tell me what the hell happened," Ryen hissed as they neared the bakery and Cray's home.

"Later Rye."

"But...Hawthorne did something? Does Katniss know?"

"I said later, Ryen," Peeta said with a pointed look.

"Yes sir." Peeta handed him the notebook and a folder.

"Wait here while I deliver my report to Commander Cray." His brother stood against the wall while Peeta rapped on the door.

"Come in." Peeta glanced sideways at his brother before pushing the door open.

"Commander? It's me. Lieutenant Peeta Mellark."

"Ah. Come in, Lieutenant. Come in." He didn't see Cray immediately and stood uncertainly in the entryway.

"I'm in the kitchen. Why don't you make us a pot of tea, dear girl?" He heard dishes clanging together and he peered into the kitchen. A girl with short dark hair was standing at the stove and Cray sat at the kitchen table, leering at her.

"Would you like cream and sugar, Lieutenant Mellark?" Peeta let out a choked gasp, which he hastily tried to cover with a cough.

The girl who was serving them was Darius's wife Rosalie. He hadn't been present at their wedding but Darius had introduced her when Peeta and Ryen had arrived in the district.

"No, thank you ma'am." Rosalie bowed her head and poured the tea into two mugs. Her hands shook as she handed Peeta his cup, then set the other in front of Cray, as if the thought of possibly touching him was too much.

"That will be all, my dear. You can continue tending to my laundry." She gave a tiny curtsy before she hurried from the room. Peeta tried to keep his hands from shaking as he sipped his tea. Why had Cray brought her here? Had he made her do other things and not just his laundry?

What would stop him from taking other married women? He had been sure Katniss would be safe once they were legally married.

Peeta's hand itched to slice the old man's throat.

"Have you come to deliver your report?"

"Ah. Yes sir, I have."

"Very well. Proceed." Cray was supposed to write everything down but he actually looked bored as he drank his tea.

"Yes sir. Gale Hawthorne from the Seam confessed and is being charged with vandalism and destruction of property. As the property owner, I decided not to press charges so he will pay a fine for the damages."

"Very noble of you, Mellark. Protecting your wife's friend." Peeta swallowed.

"Sir?"

"Don't think me stupid, Lieutenant. I know your little Seam slut goes into the woods. They both do. Who do you think buys their meat?" Peeta's breathing grew heavy as ge shifted anxiously.

"You tell her she won't get away with that anymore. Make sure they both know what will happen should they continue to break the law." Peeta's eyes widened. Was Cray actually… trying to help?

"Yes sir. The message has been delivered to both of them."

"As for your charge… I'm afraid that's not going to work." Cray drained his cup and shook his head.

"You don't own the property, Mellark. The Capitol does. That is still the President's land. And those Capitol Peacekeepers are going to wonder why I let a vandal go with just a warning. They won't like it. Word could get back to the President that I don't take order of my district."

"Commander-"

"But if we punish him, they won't have any reason to look any further into the case. I should think you would be agreeable to that since that means your wife would be safe."

"Ka- she had nothing to do with the vandalism."

"No but she hunts illegally with the vandal. And the district knows this. You think if asked they would protect either one of them? That your wife would be safe? They'll drag her to the square and shoot her in the head." Peeta's knees shook and he gripped the counter with white knuckles.

"We whip him in the square and say that is his warning. We'll make sure the Capitol men see it and the case will be closed."

"Commander… you know that a flogging will make him… incapable of working for quite some time."

"Then he shouldn't have committed the crime in the first place. For fucks sake, Mellark, who are you more worried about? Hawthorne? Or the girl?" Peeta clenched and unclenched his fists, his shoulders hunching in defeat. Cray stood to pour himself more tea and the sound of the spoon on the mug seemed to echo in the small kitchen.

"These people would sell her out in a heartbeat. Especially since she's a Seam whore. Better to not give the Capitol any reason or doubt about her."

"She is not a whore, Commander, nor has she ever been one. But you're right. I will inform Darius of the changes in this case immediately." Cray surveyed the young peacekeeper over the rim of his cup.

"Commander. Why is Mrs. Murphy here?"

"The girl needed some work, and I have plenty to do. Why does it matter to you?"

"I'm just not certain Darius would like to hear his pregnant wife is on her feet all day, that's all."

"She has simple tasks. And she doesn't complain."

"Right. I will be at the Justice Building, if you need me Commander." Peeta shuffled toward the door but turned around slowly.

"Commander Cray?" Cray crossed his arms and waited.

"My wife will be working in my family's bakery. I'll ask you to respect that and do not approach her about working for you." Cray lowered his arms, looking furious.

"Is that a threat, Mellark?"

"Just a… friendly warning, Commander. Do not go near my wife again." Cray looked livid but Peeta bowed his head and stomped toward the door. Rosalie was on the porch, folding laundry and looked startled when the door slammed.

"You tell Darius if he tries anything with you, Rosalie," he said sternly.

"Yes sir. I will." He beckoned for Ryen to follow him and they marched away from the house.

* * *

"Peeta! Will you slow down and tell me what's happening?"

"I can't right now, Rye. We need to get to the Justice Building and then I need to get home to Katniss. I need to tell her before someone else does."

"I don't understand!" Peeta glanced at Rye and bit his lip.

"I know. I'm sorry. I'll explain everything later."

They marched in silence to the Justice Building and found Darius filling out forms just inside.

"Peacekeeper Murphy, where is the accused criminal?"

"He's in the office, dictating his confession to be recorded, Lieutenant." Peeta took a deep breath and nodded. Darius noticed how pale the young man looked and he cocked his head.

"Sir? Is everything… alright?"

"No Darius. It's not. Ryen, would you please wait here for Hawthorne to finish with the secretary?"

"Yes sir." Peeta took Darius's arm and dragged him into a stairwell.

Quietly as he could, he told Darius everything Cray had said. He knew Darius knew about Katniss's and Gale's trips to the woods. When he finished, Darius looked pained.

"So we have to take Gale to the whipping post."

"I don't want to, Darius, I really don't but I can't let them hear anything about Katniss. I have to do whatever I can to protect her."

"I know Peeta. And I think Gale would understand that. Or at least, he would have before she turned down his marriage proposal," he rolled his eyes and shook his head, "But you think she will be ok after that? That the Capitol Peacekeepers won't go asking questions and sniffing around?"

"There's no reason to. She's the wife of a peacekeeper, and as long as she stays out of trouble there isn't any cause to investigate her."

"I hope you're right. Shit, who has to carry out the sentence? You?"

"I hope not. Then again, Cray won't and he wants the new men to see it happening so I suppose I'm the only one there is. Fuck," he covered his face with his hands.

"She'll understand, Peeta," he said softly.

"I'm not sure she will. I have to flog her best friend. Not the best way to gain her trust."

"You are a soldier, Peeta, and that role doesn't come without sacrifice. She has to understand you have a duty to the Capitol. Make her see reason. If it's not him, then it's her."

"Katniss would probably throw herself in front of the whip. She is fiercely protective of those she cares about."

"This I know to be true. It will be difficult, Peeta, but you've handled difficult before. You've handled impossible, and you've beaten the odds." Somehow, this was worse, Peeta decided. With a clap on the shoulder, Darius lead him back to the front desk where Ryen waited.

"He hasn't come out yet, sir."

"Peacekeeper Murphy, kindly knock on the door and tell the secretary you need to insert the changes into the sentence." Darius gave him a look of disbelief but Peeta shrugged. If he should be the one to carry out the sentence, someone else could tell Gale it was happening. And now all he wanted to do was go home to Katniss and convince himself that he wasn't the monster that he was feeling like.

* * *

Peeta avoided the rest of the peacekeepers for the remainder of his shift, locking himself into an office and poring over documents that made little sense to him. His mind and his heart raced and he was fairly surprised that Gale had not come barging in here to beat the shit out of him. Fuck he wished someone else could do the job tomorrow. But as Lieutenant, Peeta knew he had to see to his duty before anything else.

What would happen if Katniss was ever caught doing something illegal? Would they expect him to punish her?

No way in hell that would ever happen, he fumed silently. They could never make him hurt her.

"They may have changed me," he said quietly. "Turned me into something I'm not. But I will never hurt Katniss. No matter what they try to do to me." He sighed and leaned forward on his elbows, rubbing his face with his hands. He heard a soft knock and he practically jumped out of his chair.

"Come in." Ryen peered around the door and bit his lip.

"Lieutenant, I just came to tell you it's nearing 5:00." He looked up at the clock and exhaled; he could go home to Katniss and forget about this awful day.

That was a joke, he scoffed to himself.

"Sir?"

"Thanks Rye. Come on in and shut the door." Ryen closed the door behind him and stood against it.

"You look terrible."

"We're still at work. You can't insult me until we leave the Justice Building," Peeta answered with a tired smile.

"In this room, you're just my brother. Are you ok?"

"Not really," Peeta sighed. "But I don't see a way out of this one so don't ask."

"You going to tell me everything or do I have to strangle it out of you?"

"You could try, but I think I was reigning champion before we were taken to 2." Ryen grinned and nodded, taking a step toward his little brother. He hated seeing Peeta looking so… broken. At the wedding, it was like his brother had returned from the dead. He'd never seen Peeta smile like that and the glow that seemed to

constantly follow him around was fading in this tiny room.

"Have a seat, Rye." Peeta kicked a chair toward him and Ryen sat across from his brother. Peeta leaned back in his chair and ran his hands through his hair.

Quickly and quietly, he told his brother everything. The vandalism, Gale's lack of involvement, Cray's warning and sentence. Ryen listened with wide eyes and by the time Peeta was finished, his Lieutenant was pacing the office, his hair sticking all over the place from his hands.

"Fuck," Ryen finally breathed.

"Yeah, my sentiments exactly," Peeta cried in frustration.

"Peeta… I would do the same for you. And Bing would do it for us."

"I know that, which is why I'm not trying to talk him out of it. His brothers are still young. But I don't know how I am supposed to face my wife and tell her I am taking her best friend to the whipping post tomorrow! Rye… I'll lose her for sure."

"Look," he took a deep breath, "I'll admit, the situation sucks. But you won't lose her." Peeta eyed him doubtfully.

"Katniss understands what duty means. And she will understand why you are doing this. You know she won't be happy. She might even scream and curse you at first. But this won't be the end of you two."

"How do you know that, Rye," Peeta nearly whined as he sank back into his chair. "Katniss is protective and rebellious. She will want to know why I let this happen. Why I wasn't able to help him more."

"She's a smart girl. She doesn't think you are the president with unlimited power. You are grounded by the position you hold. And you have to do it. Because Cray is right… those people out there would throw her to the wolves. And it would be your hand that holds her whip."

"Never. I would never-"

"You'd see to your duty, Peeta, as you always have. It's a terrible position that you've been put in but life isn't fair. We watch children being slaughtered on live

television. No one would call this world fair." Peeta huffed and covered his eyes. Ryen glanced at the clock and stood.

"Let's get out of here. I got a message that Katniss is at Madge's, helping with wedding plans."

"Ok but I should whip up a batch of cheesebuns before I see her."

"Why? You think cheesebuns will make her less likely to attack you?" Peeta shrugged miserably.

"Cheesebuns don't hurt much when they're thrown with impressive force."

* * *

Peeta stripped off his uniform the moment he was back in his house, and hastily made a batch of Katniss's favorite treat. Ryen waited in the living room while Peeta changed, then wrapped up the food.

"Hey, let's take our girls out to dinner tonight."

"Out to dinner?"

"Yeah. You know, a restaurant. Like the ones in 2."

"We're not in 2 anymore, Rye."

"I know that," the elder Mellark rolled his eyes. "There's a new restaurant that just opened in town. Darius was telling me about it. Let's take them there." Peeta frowned across the room.

"You think Katniss is less likely to make a scene if we are in a place like that?"

"It has nothing to do with that," Ryen said impatiently. Peeta quirked a brow and his brother huffed.

"Ok fine. I just think Madge and I should be there when you tell her. I can defend you."

"I can't have my brother defending me. I'm Lieutenant of this district and my wife needs to understand and respect that." Ryen actually winced at Peeta's harsh tone. Peeta sighed and shook his head.

"Alright. It would be nice to have some back up, especially if she decides to murder me."

"You're making my toasting cake! She can't murder you til after the wedding."

"I'm making the strawberry chiffon cake? When were you going to tell me that?"

"Well I'm sure Dad will try to bake most of it but no one is better with that creamy frosting than you, baby bro."

"Keep it up, Rye. I'm sure Madge would love to hear about the time you got drunk and brought home two girls from the brothel."

"You wouldn't dare," Ryen looked horrified.

"Call me baby bro again, then."

"Don't act like I don't have dirt on you. Like thousands of pages of sketches." A cheesebun sailed across the room and hit Ryen in the forehead.

"See? They don't hurt much," Peeta said with a wink, opening the door and beckoning for his brother to follow him.

* * *

 _ **I love all the speculation about Gale and Cray. How do you think Katniss will react? How will Peeta get himself out of this? Good on you all for recognizing that Peeta's position will put him in an uncomfortable place now and his duty comes first. Leave me a review, I'll try not to make it so long before I post again :)**_


	17. Chapter 17

"Good evening, Mayor Undersee," Ryen stammered. "I was hoping to talk to Madge?"

"Come in, boys. The girls are giggling in the foyer." The mayor shook hands with both of them and lead them down the hall. Sure enough, they heard giggling and it wasn't just Madge; Peeta's heart soared at the sound of it.

"Ladies," the Mayor cleared his throat. "Some handsome gentlemen to see you."

"Daddy," Madge rolled her eyes as the Mellark boys entered the room. Peeta's eyes widened at the sight of Katniss sitting in the floor with a lovely yellow gown flowing around her.

"Close your mouth, Peeta," Madge giggled. "I gave Katniss a bunch of dresses."

"Forced me into them, more like," Katniss grumbled. Peeta swept upon her and pressed his lips to hers.

"You're stunning," he whispered.

"Rye, I'm so glad you're here! Help me pick a color."

"Um, a color?" Ryen cast Peeta a confused look.

"Yes silly! A color for our ceremony. Katniss will not help me!"

"I didn't even know it was a thing," Katniss leaned over to whisper in Peeta's ear. "We didn't have a color did we?"

"Um, I guess not."

"So here's what I was thinking," Madge held up swatches of color and Katniss stifled a giggle at the confusion on Ryen's face. Madge might have said she would be no good at planning a toasting but she was clearly enjoying it. She hadn't stopped talking about dresses and flowers and cake all afternoon.

"Well how about pink, to go with your cake," Peeta suggested. Ryen cast him a murderous look and both Katniss and Peeta had to stifle their laughter.

"Ohhh, I love that idea! Pink roses and ribbons and pink writing on the cake! What do you think, Rye?"

"Didn't you say your favorite color is blue?"

"Well yes, but-"

"Mine too," he said quickly. "So let's do blue."

"Hmmm. Blue flowers will be difficult to find but a blue ribbon will look so pretty on my dress and oh, I could wrap a blue ribbon around the flowers and, ok, let's do blue!" She jumped up and kissed Ryen hard on the mouth. The elder Mellark was blushing when she pulled away.

"I need to let Mama and Daddy know. Excuse me!" They stared as she ran out if the room, calling for her father. Ryen shook his head.

"Did you put something in her water?"

"I swear I didn't. She's been acting like this all day."

"That is not the Madge I remember," Peeta chuckled.

"Yeah, almost seems like she and Delly switched bodies."

"People can change," Katniss shrugged. "You practically came back from the dead. She can be happy about marrying you, you know." Ryen stared at her, then

turned to his brother.

"You going to step in here?"

"No way. My wife is pretty damn clever. And she's right, Rye. Clearly Madge cared for you more than we realized." He slid a hand into Katniss's and squeezed. A

small smile crossed Ryen's face and he nodded.

"Here. I made these for my clever wife," Peeta pushed the wrapped cheesebuns toward Katniss and she gasped.

"I have been pushed into dresses all afternoon and I am STARVING!" It was strange to say, now that she no longer experienced that word but she did know very

well how it felt. Peeta gave her a smile and kissed her temple.

"Rye and I are taking you ladies to dinner, so don't fill up."

"Mk," her mouth was bulging with pastry and Peeta chuckled. He glanced at Ryen, who was watching him, and his smile faded slightly.

"Katniss… there's something I need to talk to you abou-"

"Mother and Daddy love the idea of blue," Madge squealed as she ran back into the room and nearly knocked Ryen over with a hug.

"Great," Ryen laughed, "Listen, Peet and I are taking you girls out tonight. To try that new restaurant in town."

"Oh gosh! I've only been to a restaurant once and it was when Daddy was meeting with some other mayors!"

"Well then, my princess, shall we?" Madge glanced down at her dress and shrugged.

"I'm too hungry to care how I look. Let's go!"

"What were you saying," Katniss whispered as Peeta offered his arm.

"Um, we can talk about it at the restaurant." She nodded, not noticing how his voice trembled.

* * *

Katniss had never even dreamed about going to a restaurant; the idea was too far out of the spectrum of reality. Yet here she was, being waited on like she was the President's daughter or something. The server was clearly Merchant class; she doubted Merchants would like Seam people touching their food and that was the only people who could afford to come here, she decided with a scowl.

Peeta's brow quirked and he reached over to take her hand.

"You ok?"

"Yeah. Why do you ask?"

"Your scowl just became way more prominent. Did I say something?"

"Sorry, just thinking." Peeta and Ryen exchanged glances and Ryen offered the basket of bread to everyone.

"This is such a nice place," Madge said quietly. "I didn't think we would ever see a restaurant in 12."

"It's pretty empty," Peeta observed.

"That's because no one can afford food, let alone to pay someone else to cook it for them." All three of them looked surprised at Katniss's biting tone. She bit her lip and lowered her head.

"Sorry. I didn't mean to sound rude. I'm still...really new at all of this."

"Don't worry about it, Katniss. You'll get used to Peeta buying you all kinds of stuff and making sure you're well fed." But that was the wrong thing to say, Peeta decided. Katniss seemed to withdraw into herself even more and he threw an irritated look towards Ryen. He squeezed her hand and brought it into his lap.

"Things will get better someday, Katniss. Until then, we just have to enjoy the gifts we have been granted. Rye's right; I'm going to do everything I can to treat you and your family as well as you deserve. So you might as well just wipe away that scowl and understand what I do, is because of what you mean to me." She looked like she was about to protest or the very least, scowl some more, but she squeezed his hand and nodded.

"So what should I order?"

"Whatever you want. The Capitol is treating us to dinner."

"Well in that case, I want the biggest most expensive dish on the menu," Madge's eyes gleamed.

"Oh yeah. I'm marrying the right girl," Ryen pulled her hand to his lips and Madge laughed softly. When the server came to take their orders, he spoke to the Mellark boys, even ignoring Madge completely. But she shrugged as if it didn't matter to her.

"Being the Mayor's daughter makes you invisible sometimes."

* * *

Katniss didn't want to admit it but the food was delicious. Ryen and Peeta had ordered several different plates so they could all share and Katniss was still hungry. Both boys looked affronted when Madge suggested they order dessert, which made Katniss laugh.

"Do not tell Dad," Ryen hissed to Peeta as they gave the server their order.

"The bakery is closed by now," Madge pointed out.

"So? Dad would expect one of us to bake something for you ladies."

"I bet Peeta bakes for Katniss a lot. You never bake me anything," she pouted.

"When you move in with me, I'll bake you anything you want," Ryen said with a wink.

"So next week you can start waking him up at midnight and tell him to bake you something," Peeta nudged her playfully.

"Oh my god," Madge's eyes widened. "I'm going to be Madge Mellark soon."

"I like it," Ryen nodded. "It suits you."

"I like Katniss Mellark," Madge glanced over at Peeta and Katniss. "It has a ring to it."

"I guess so," Katniss gave a half-hearted shrug. "But if someone calls me Mrs. Mellark, I'm going to be looking over my shoulder for your mother."

"Nah. April is Mrs. Mellark the Nice," Ryen folded his hands behind his head and leaned back in his chair. "So we will have to come up with names for both of you too."

"I'll be Mrs. Mellark the Magnificent," Madge exclaimed, bursting into a fit of giggles. Peeta snorted and shook his head.

"No more wine for Madge tonight."

"One glass," she held up a finger. "I had one glass."

"Clearly that's enough."

"Hey...it's getting kind of late," Ryen said with a pointed look. "Peeta, wasn't there something you wanted to talk about?"

"Oh...right." His heart fell and he glanced sideways at his wife. He had been enjoying himself so much that he had let himself forget about Gale. "Yeah, um, Katniss. Something...happened at work today."

"That doesn't sound good," she said with a frown.

"No, it's...it's not. But I'm not really sure how to tell you-."

"Just say it, Peeta," she said impatiently. Peeta gulped and looked to his brother for help. Despite what he had said about not needing Ryen to defend him, he felt like he was sweeping out to the ocean with nothing to hold onto. He felt his hand growing damp with sweat but he squeezed her fingers tighter, terrified that she would pull away and never let him hold her hand again.

"Ok. Katniss, we found out who painted the words on my house."

"And... what's going to happen to them?" She hadn't asked who. She wouldn't think anyone close to her would do something like that.

"They will be taken to the whipping post in the morning." Her face fell and he swallowed thickly.

"I don't want to...I told Cray I wouldn't press charges, so they would go free with just a fine. But Cray told me I have to punish the guilty party."

"I understand," she heaved a sigh. "I know you don't want to, but you have to see to your duty. I understand that." He hoped she would feel the same in a minute.

"Katniss...I'm so sorry."

"Why are you sorry? You're the Lieutenant. I told you, I understand." His sad eyes met hers and her brow furrowed even more.

"There's something else. Tell me, Peeta." Peeta closed his eyes for a moment.

"It's Gale." He felt her try to pull her hand back immediately but he held on.

"What are you talking about?"

"Gale has been accused of vandalism and destruction of property. He's been sentenced to flogging in the square." She shook her head, her mouth a thin line.

"No. You're lying."

"I took down his confession, Katniss," Ryen said gently. "Peeta's telling the truth."

"Gale wouldn't write that! Someone is setting him up! You have to-"

"Katniss," Peeta grabbed her other hand and moved closer. "Please listen to me." She stopped struggling for a moment and he held her gaze.

"It wasn't Gale," he whispered. "But he took the fall."

"Why would he…" she trailed off, her eyes widening. "Oh my god." She yanked her hands away and covered her face.

"Rory...or Vick. It had to be."

"I'm almost positive it's one of his brothers. He refuses to say who it was but he told me he would take the punishment so it's got to be one of them. And I thought I would be able to get him out of this with just a fine but it's bigger than that, Katniss." Quickly and as quietly as he could, he told her what Cray had told him about the new peacekeepers and the risk of Katniss being brought into it.

"But you can protect me! If it helps Gale escape a whipping, you can-"

"I can tell them you are my wife and defend you that way. But I won't be able to stop the people in this district from telling the new head peacekeeper that you used to hunt. And they will, Katniss. They will sell you out."

"So what makes you think I'm safe," she positively shrieked. Peeta glanced around nervously. "What makes you think they won't talk even after Gale is whipped? What makes you think you can protect me, then?"

"Katniss, Peeta is trying to keep you safe-"

"You're his brother," she shut him down. "Of course you are coming to his defense! In fact that's what this dinner is about, isn't it? You were too cowardly to tell me on your own so you needed your brother and Madge to be here too."

"Katniss-"

"I'd like to stay with my mother and Prim tonight," she said as she stood up. "And since it's nearly curfew, I would like for you to escort me."

"Katniss, please-"

"Or I will walk there by myself," she said in an angry whisper. Peeta silently pleaded with her to sit down. Madge had sobered and was watching with wide eyes but she knew better than to intervene. Peeta took a deep breath and reached out for her hand.

"Please don't do this." Her face was stoney and unmoving as she kept her arms crossed over her chest.

"Fine. I'll see you tomorrow."

"Wait!" He jumped up and shook his head. "You'll be questioned if you're out after dark. I'll...I'll walk you there myself." She nodded once before she turned around disappeared in a whirl of yellow. He sighed deeply and bit his lip.

"Um...Ryen, can you-?"

"I'll take care of the bill. Make sure she's safe."

"Give her some time, Peeta," Madge said softly. "She'll be fine." He nodded miserably before he hastily moved toward the exit, afraid that she had left without him and knowing how wrong Madge was.

* * *

The air was cool tonight and Katniss wrapped her arms around herself for warmth as they walked. Peeta cleared his throat and started to slide his jacket off but she shook her head sharply.

"I don't want it."

"Katniss, please. You said you understood that it was my duty." She stopped mid-step and he nearly crashed into her.

"This is my best friend, Peeta! You should have made something up to save him!"

"You're asking me to break the law for another man," he said coldly.

"Like you wouldn't do it if it were me," she spat.

"That is different. You are my wife. I risked a beating for you when I was a boy, you don't think I would do it now that I'm a grown man?"

"Then help me save him, Peeta! His mother is dying! He cares for his family all by himself. If he is beaten, he won't be able to work!"

"I know that," he said softly. "I planned on taking them food."

"They won't accept it. And they will hate you when they find out what you've done. They'll hate me even more, for staying with you."

"It sounds to me they're already displeased with you for staying with me," he said pointedly. Katniss's lips tightened.

"Gale has taught his brothers to be wary of Merchants and Peacekeepers."

"There is a difference between being wary and loathing, Katniss." He took a deep breath and took a step closer. "Look, I feel terrible about this. And not just because he's your friend...I mean, I really don't want to do this! I want no part in it, and I certainly don't want to be the one to carry it out. But I don't know how I'm supposed to refuse my responsibilities. If we get a new Head Peacekeeper, I need to do what I can to impress him, to make sure he doesn't make our lives difficult." Katniss shook her head in disgust and kept walking, leaving him to gape after her.

"What-"

"You'd beat Gale to make sure the new peacekeeper doesn't pick on you," she spat. "Is that the kind of person you are, Peeta?"

"Hey," he tugged on her arm to make her stop, and she was glad it was so dark; he was glowering and his face was hidden in shadow.

"Do you want to know what happens to peacekeepers who don't follow the rules?" She wanted to say no, but she kept quiet, crossing her arms over her chest.  
"They're taken to the Capitol and turned into Avoxes. You know what an Avox is don't you? Their tongues are cut out and they are turned into slaves. Their families are beaten and…worse. And then they're sold. I watched it happen. Before Ryen and I returned to 12...one of our bunk mates refused an order. They didn't bother hiding it, Katniss. In fact they wanted us to see it. They wanted us to see what happens when... they beat him within an inch of his life and made his girlfriend and mother watch while they cut out his tongue. And then all we could hear were garbled screams as he was forced to watch the soldiers rape the women. He was from District 2… and they still did that to him. The Capitol is full of monsters, Katniss. If you think I'm proud to work for them, you're mistaken. If I could run away from here and never look back, I would do it in a heartbeat." He tentatively reached for her hand and was surprised when she let him take it.

"All I want is to go somewhere with you. We could live in the woods. You could teach me to hunt...and I would build you a house. And we could have babies and we would never have to watch them at a Reaping. If things were different...that's how we could be. But it's not how the world is. I keep hoping for things to get better and wishing for things to change."

"Why don't we, Peeta?" His eyes widened as she spoke. "Why don't we run away?"

"They would catch us."

"Maybe not," she protested.

"They would make us wish for death. And I would die if something were to happen to you." She shook her head and studied their entwined hands.

"I get it, Peeta. You're as trapped as the rest of us are. Maybe more so, because the Capitol is using you. And they twist it into this sense of right and wrong and teach you that it's your job. They brainwash you and try to turn you into monsters, like them. But you have to fight it. You have to find that sense of morality and remember that you are a good man! And good men don't whip innocent men. They stand up for what is right. They stand up for what they believe in." Peeta sighed and stared at his feet.

"I'll go to Cray in the morning and ask for him to rescind the sentence."

"And if he doesn't? What will you do?" He tried to make out her face in the dark.

"I don't know."

"At least you're honest." He could see her scowl clearly. "You think this new Head Peacekeeper will be worse than Cray?"

"Yes," he said without hesitation. "If it's who I am thinking it will be...it will be so much worse. Cray is fairly lax on maintaining order. He trusts the peacekeepers to do things around here and that's not always a bad thing. Darius, for example, is fair and he jokes around a lot. He doesn't like to punish people or anything bad. Of course he is of lower rank but he is a good guy and I look up to him. Other peacekeepers, however, let that power go to their heads and are complete dicks about it. I try not to let it change me but…" he sighed, remembering how he had attacked Jacobson earlier. He had even hit Gale. Peeta had never been a violent person; his father had always said the boy never had a mean bone in his body. But after years of training, Peeta knew that just wasn't true. He truly hated what the Capitol had turned him into.

Katniss was right. They had brainwashed him and gave him the choice: tend to your obligations, no matter how horrific they are, or watch your loved ones be punished.

He'd never forget when he and Ryen had learned that difficult lesson. Because of what the Capitol had done, neither Mellark would ever be the same.

"I'll do everything in my power to save him from this," he finally spoke. "But if it comes down to him or you, I'm sorry, your safety is the most important to me."

"What if it came down to him or you?" Peeta frowned.

"What?"

"If you were allowed to take his sentence yourself...would you do it?" Peeta gaped at her uncertainly. Was she really asking him to take a beating for a guy he really didn't like? And who really didn't like him?

"If you asked me to...yes, I would." And he meant it. He would do anything for her, he knew that.

"Really?" She sounded skeptical.

"You mean everything to me, Katniss. I won't lie to you and say I'd be doing it for him but for you...yes. I would do it, if it made you happy."

"Of course it wouldn't make me happy, Peeta," she shrieked. "Don't try to put that on me!"

"Put what on you?"

"That kind of choice! I won't choose between my husband and my…" she started to say best friend again but she hadn't spoken to him since their toasting. She knew he was still upset and hurt and Gale could be stubborn and pigheaded. Just like her, she thought bitterly.

"I know his biggest reason for hating me is that he thinks I stole you from him," he said softly.

"I told you before, he can't steal me-"

"Because you were never his in the first place," he finished gently. "Yes, I know. I also know you're not a possession. I'm just telling you that's the impression that I get."

"He has never liked Merchants. Or Peacekeepers. He can be a stubborn ass sometimes but he's still innocent. Because he took his brother's place, I just feel like we should be doing whatever we can to save him."

"You're right. But it will be hard to argue that case, since he is taking his brother's place. If his brother confessed, that would change things. And Gale doesn't want that to happen. But I'll do what I can," he sighed and dug his hands in his pockets. "Come on, we should get going. It's already past curfew." He started to lead her in the direction of the Seam and she paused, before she changed direction and headed toward their house. Peeta watched her with a frown.

"Am I not escorting you to your mother's house?"

"You can escort me home and make sure no peacekeeper messes with me," she shot over her shoulder. He paused, taking in her words. Home. And she wasn't walking toward the Seam. She was heading to his home. Their home.

Sighing, he jogged to keep up with her as she walked briskly through the dark street. She didn't let him hold her hand or touch her but her rigid posture had softened somewhat. He walked by her side and tried to think of the right words to say.

"Who's there," he heard a deep voice off to his left. Katniss froze and his arm automatically wrapped around her waist.

"Show yourself and state your business," Peeta said firmly.

"A Peacekeeper keeping a lookout for wrongdoers. You're out after curfew, you know." The man stepped closer and Peeta's eyes narrowed.

"Jacobson. I thought I sent you home earlier." Jacobson's bruised eye narrowed.

"Oh it's you Lieutenant. Out for a little stroll in the moonlight?" Peeta held Katniss to his side protectively.

"You did send me home, sir, but Commander Cray wanted as many of us stationed around the district as possible. Apparently the new Head Peacekeeper will be here in the wee hours of the morning."

"Why was I not informed?" Jacobson merely shrugged.

"Probably because you were out with your lovely wife. For some reason, Lieutenant, Commander Cray acted as if he didn't know what I was talking about when I told him about our altercation earlier today." Katniss felt Peeta stiffen.

"Failed to mention it in your report, I imagine?"

"It's your word against mine, Jacobson."

"Maybe. You do have some peacekeepers willing to lick your shoes, Mellark. That idiot Murphy included. Still, I'd be careful if I were you. Things might change around here, once Commander Thread comes into town and starts to take real order."

"You had better watch yourself, Jacobson," Peeta growled. "I'm still First Lieutenant around here. I can have you shipped off to another district with just a phone call to my Superior in District 2." Jacobson's smirk slid from his face and he shook his head.

"Go ahead. While you're at it, tell him you're fucking a Seam whore and that's why you're shirking your duties-"

"Get the hell out of here," Peeta released Katniss and moved toward the man. "Before I give you another black eye."

"I'm sure Commander Thread won't be among your worshippers, Lieutenant," he laughed as he backed away. "Especially once I tell him about your pretty little wife going into the woods." Peeta started after him but Jacobson took off into the night. He stood still for a moment, his breathing heavy, until Katniss took his hand.

Silently, she tugged him toward their house and closed the door behind them. His face was red and he was shaking all over.

"I'll make you some tea," she said softly. He grabbed her hand as she started to leave and she looked into his pleading eyes. She reached up to caress his cheek and he closed his eyes, turning into her palm. When she tried to move to the kitchen, again, he held onto her wrist. Finally she pulled both of his hands, leading him into the kitchen. She gently sat him down and moved toward the counter to make the tea. Peeta watched her move around the kitchen, his lips parted as if he

wanted to speak. When the water was ready, she stirred in the leaves and set it in front of him.

"No sugar," she said softly.

"Thank you." She nodded and sat across from him, holding her cup close to her cheek.

"What was he talking about?" He didn't have to ask what she was referring to.

"He insulted you...well, all Seam people to be honest, and I lost my temper."

"You hit him?" Her brow quirked.

"Darius had to calm me down. I keep losing it, Katniss. I used to be so mild-mannered and now, my temper gets away from me in about a millisecond. I hate it," he added miserably. Katniss pursed her lips but didn't say anything. "I shouldn't have hit him. I know that. But he's an asshole and I just…" he sighed and shook his head.

"So this new Head Peacekeeper...Thread, he said? Have you met him?"

"Once," he said dully, wincing as the tea burned his tongue. When he didn't elaborate, Katniss set her cup down.

"We should be worried?" He tapped his thumb against the rim of his cup, staring off into space.

"Yes," he finally said. "I don't know why Thread is coming here but it's not good. He loves his position and shows his power. Going off from what I've heard, he was born in District 1 and his brother was a Career tribute. His sister volunteered the year after that and she came in second place. The whole family is pretty bloodthirsty, from what I hear."

"And now he will be Head Peacekeeper," she said faintly.

"Thread likes punishment. He prides himself on being the one to carry out lashings, or executions, when the Head isn't really supposed to be the one to do it. He also likes to do things the old way...he believes in harsher punishments."

"You mean like torture," she asked with wide eyes.

"I mean he won't just beat someone. He will put them in front of a firing squad. For a small infraction." He ran his hand through his hair and propped his elbows on the table.

"Cray actually ordered Purnia to shoot the vandal, before we knew who it was. But I think Cray might know that Gale isn't really the one who did it. Still, he says that if we don't punish him, the Capitol men will, and then they will do some digging for more information. I'm going to call my Superior; he likes me and maybe he could help or at least give me some advice on keeping you...keeping everyone safe from Thread. He doesn't particularly like Thread either."

"Then why is Thread in charge?"

"He's loyal to President Snow. And the President has promoted him several times. Thread is a scumbag but that doesn't matter to the President." Peeta rose and headed over to the phone which was attached to his wall.

"Why don't you go take a shower while I make the call? It might make you feel better." She knew the warm water would soothe her aching muscles but she also wanted to hear what Peeta would say to his Superior. He watched her for a moment before he dialed the number and leaned against the wall, the phone propped on his shoulder.

"Yes this is First Lieutenant Peeta Mellark of District 12. I'm trying to reach Commander Duartyr. Is he available?" Katniss leaned against the threshold and watched his eyes widen.

"Oh...oh really? Wow that's...yes, that's wonderful news. No I'll hold. Thank you." It was only a moment before Peeta was speaking again.

"Sir. It's Mellark. Congratulations on your promotion! Incredible news, really. No sir, everything is fine. Yes...yes I did get married," his lips curved upwards for a moment, his eyes darting over to Katniss. "She is. Still beautiful, yes sir. Oh, um, no sir, that is, we haven't really...discussed...anyway, sir, I was calling because...well, I'm sure you have heard about recent changes in our staffing here in 12." His face turned pale and Katniss moved closer.

"Yes sir, that's what I heard as well. Uh huh. Do you have any idea why-... I see. Yes, I have heard about that but I didn't think...yes, I understand that. Wait. Really?" His eyes widened and they landed on Katniss. She straightened up and frowned and he cleared his throat, attempting to turn to the side.

"Do we know this for sure? Well, what can be done? Of course sir, I'd be honored...oh, well my brother is getting married in a few days. Yes sir. Yes, he would kill me if I missed it. Of...of course. I'll make the proper arrangements. Yes. Oh you mean...um...I'll ask her. I don't know if she will want to make that trip. I see. Very well, I will make arrangements for the both of us. What is the date? OK. Yes sir, we will be there. Yes...I understand. In the meantime, is there anything I should do while...he's in charge?" He glanced at Katniss again and lowered his voice.

"I have no fear for myself. My wife is another matter entirely. No, of course not. Yes. Yes, I understand, it's just that...you think he will be reasonable-?" Peeta nodded while he listened and Katniss impatiently moved into the room and sat at the table, watching him.

"I understand. Thank you sir. Yes, I will. Good night to you." He hung up and Katniss jumped to her feet.

"What was that all about?" Peeta ran a hand through his hair and exhaled.

"Let's go talk in the bedroom."

"What? Why?"

"It's more comfortable in-"

"Peeta, I don't care about being comfortable! What did he say? Why are you so pale?" He closed his eyes for a moment and reached for her hand.

"He knows about Thread and says something is going on. There is no reason he would be sent here, unless something big was happening. And Duartyr has been promoted to General. That's a huge promotion, Katniss. He went from Commander to General, which just doesn't happen. Something is going on in Panem."

"Something like what?"

"I don't know," he said, though Katniss didn't really believe him.

"Ok, so he knows about Thread coming here. You didn't ask him what to do about it. Or how we can keep people from getting whipped or shot?"

"He says it's on President Snow's orders. There isn't much we can do, except stay out of trouble."

"Well that's great except that the entire district including the current Head Peacekeeper knows I hunt illegally."

"Used to hunt," he corrected her. "As long as you don't do it anymore, Thread can't touch you for it."

"Does the same go for Gale?"

"Yes. As long as he stays within the district boundaries, he's safe. Now as far as the whipping goes...I have to plead with Cray to rescind the sentence before Thread gets here. That's the only way."

"You're sure Thread won't just...shoot Gale?"

"I won't let that happen, Katniss. I promise." She nodded and he chewed on his lip. She could tell there was more on his mind but all she could think about right now was Gale.

"Where is Gale?"

"Darius escorted him home to his family this afternoon. Cray didn't order for him to spend the night in the jail so I didn't mention it. Of course-" he stopped when his phone rang and he moved to answer it immediately.

"Mellark." His face darkened within a matter of seconds, something that didn't sit well with Katniss. "I'll be right there." He slammed the phone down and stared at the wall.

"I have to go."

"What? Where?"

"Commander Thread is on his way to the district. Commander Cray wants all Peacekeepers to maintain a perimeter and be on duty until the Capitol Peacekeepers arrive." He hurried off to change and Katniss rushed after him.

"Wait...are you going to try to talk to Cray tonight?"

"Yes, I'll go there first. I'm sorry, Katniss. I wish…" he trailed off, shaking his head. She watched as he donned the white uniform that she hated so much. The symbol of the Capitol's power looked terrifying and out of place on her gentle boy with the bread. He glanced at her as he held the helmet under his arm.

"I really wish I could be the man you deserve," he whispered before he pulled it over his head. Katniss opened her mouth to speak but he stomped past her and out of the room.

"Stay inside until I return. If you need anything, call Madge. She will know how to reach me."

"But...Peeta, wait!" He paused and she stood in front of him, staring up in confusion. Her brow furrowed as she cocked her head. He shifted nervously when she continued to gawk at him without speaking.

"What are you staring at?"

"I'm just trying to see...if you're really still in there." He swallowed at her words. It was like she was seeing a completely different person in front of her.

"I'm a First Lieutenant of the District 12 Peacekeeper Headquarters," he said, his voice muffled by the cumbersome helmet. She shook her head and took a step back.

"I'll be waiting for Peeta Mellark, the baker's son, to return to me." With that, she whirled around and ran into their bedroom, slamming the door behind her. Peeta watched her go, his heart sinking low in his chest. This was so much more complicated than he had ever imagined it would be. He wasn't free to love her the way he wanted, because he was supposed to put his country and his duty first. And he knew things were stirring in Panem. When it came down to it...would he be able to do what needed to be done?

Sighing, he grabbed his rifle from the closet and set out for Cray's house.

* * *

There were several Peacekeepers on the porch when he arrived and they all saluted him.

"Lieutenant Mellark!"

"At ease, Soldier. I need to speak to Commander Cray."

"He's inside, sir. We were told to wait out here." Peeta nodded and stepped inside the dark house.

"Commander?" The house was silent and he tightened his grip on his gun. "Commander Cray?" Peeta glanced in the kitchen and frowned. Tiny hairs on the back of his neck stood up as he moved from room to room, dread sinking in.

"Commander? It's Lieutenant Mellark." He glanced toward the stairs and slowly began to climb. He held his rifle in front of him and took a step down the hall. He called for the commander again but stopped when he saw the bathroom door ajar. He glanced down the hall before he pushed the bathroom door open and his eyes widened.

"Soldiers! Come upstairs immediately!" He heard footsteps thundering through the house as he bent low to check the old peacekeeper's pulse.

"Oh shit," one of the younger soldiers exclaimed. Peeta looked up and shook his head.

"Who told you to wait outside?"

"Sir?" Peeta stood and set his rifle against the wall. The wound across Cray's throat poured blood, which now soaked the fluffy rug in front of the sink. Peeta felt sick.

"Soldier, who told you to wait outside? Was it Commander Cray?"

"No sir, it was...a new Capitol peacekeeper. I forgot his name but he said he needed to speak to the Commander. He told us to guard the door."

"Is he dead, Lieutenant?"

"Yes. Slit throat. Was this man the new Head Peacekeeper?"

"No sir. He said Commander Thread will be here in the morning and sent him on ahead to talk to Commander Cray." Peeta frowned and glanced down at his former commander. Why would Thread have him killed? Suddenly an idea popped into his head and he straightened up.

"Go back downstairs, soldiers, and make sure the peacekeeper isn't still in the house. I'll call for reinforcements and in the morning, we will bury Commander Cray."

"Yes Lieutenant Mellark." The men backed out of the bathroom and headed back downstairs. Peeta watched them go before he hurried into Cray's study. Papers and files were strewn across Cray's desk but Peeta spotted a clean sheet of paper and quickly scrawled a few messy sentences. He then took Cray's official stamp and placed the mark below the forged signature. Folding the paper and stuffing it in his pocket, he closed the bathroom door so that no one would mess with the body before he went back downstairs.

"I need to make the rounds and let the men know to be on their guard. Was there anything else you can remember about this peacekeeper, Soldier Rollins?"

"No sir. He just said he needed to speak to Commander Cray. He also asked where the First Lieutenant lives." Peeta felt the blood drain from his face completely.

"Did you tell him?" The man's guilty look told Peeta all he needed to know; he practically ran out of the house, nearly flattening more peacekeepers, who looked shocked, and he tore across the yard and ran back to his house, his heart ready to jump out of his chest.


	18. Chapter 18

"Katniss!" He burst into the house and called her name frantically as he moved down the hall.

"Katniss? Are you here?" Please, he prayed in his head. Please, please, please…

"Katniss!" He pushed the bedroom door open so hard, the bang echoed off the walls. Katniss sat straight up in bed, her eyes wide.

"Peeta, what's wrong?"

"Thank god." He pushed his helmet off and crossed over to the bed, roughly pulling her into his arms.

"Ow, Peeta, that hurts!"

"I'm sorry," he released her and she gingerly rubbed at her chest where she had been pressed into the hard uniform. "I'm sorry, I just wanted to make sure you were alright."

"Why wouldn't I be," she yawned and rubbed at her face.

"Cray is dead." Her hand froze on her cheek and she gaped at him. They didn't waste any emotions over the man, but it was still shocking to hear.

"What?"

"I think Thread had him killed." He quietly told her what the young soldier had told him, and her eyes widened.

"Why would he do that?"

"It's possible someone in the Capitol ordered it to be done."

"Someone...like Snow?" Peeta bit his lip.

"I've heard rumors that President Snow is displeased with Cray's way of running things. The Minister of Security has been looking to replace Cray for awhile now, and that's why he sent Thread. He thinks 12 is...going to be trouble."

"What kind of trouble?"

"Duartyr told me there is rebellious activity around this region."

"So Snow thinks District 12 is in on it?"

"Possibly. Thread will enforce the laws we have long since forgotten, or let slide. It's why we have to be careful. In the meantime, I need you to visit Gale and make sure he and his family understand what is at stake here. They won't listen to me, but I know they will listen to you."

"But-"

"Listen to me," he took her hands. "Things could get very bad for us. Or, as Duartyr said, things could turn out well and I'll be promoted. I honestly don't know."

"Promoted? He thinks you'll be promoted?"

"He hinted at it. I don't know. There's something else."

"I'm not sure I can handle any more news," she said grumpily.

"I promised I wouldn't lie to you, Katniss. So I'm going to tell you the truth, against Duartyr's wishes. We are going to visit the Capitol next week."

"Who's we?"

"My wife is expected to accompany me." She jerked backwards and shook her head.

"Why," she asked suspiciously.

"I'm supposed to tell you it's for the President's granddaughter's sixteenth birthday party and all of the higher rank Peacekeepers are invited."

"But that's not the real reason?" He looked uneasy.

"The President wishes to meet you."

"Wait, what? Why?"

"I wish I knew."

"Peeta, I'm just a Seam girl from District 12. Why in the world would the President of Panem want to meet me?" Her eyes widened and her hand flew to her mouth.

"Do you think he knows? About...going into the woods?"

"I don't know how he could," he said softly. "I honestly think it's because General Duartyr has talked about you."

"Why would he talk about me...or even know about me?"

"You were a...a hot topic, when I lived in 2. Ryen was the only one who knew why I really wanted to be stationed in 12 but Duartyr was fond of me and took an interest in my personal life. I wasn't like the other soldiers. I mean, I didn't bring girls back to my barracks and I didn't show any interest in any women when we visited the Capitol or 1. He found this odd, so I told him I was in love with a girl back home... but didn't tell him anything else," he took a deep breath and shook his head. "Well one night, Duartyr insisted we all go to this...they call it a nightclub but it was really a high-end brothel. And everyone got piss drunk and Ryen started blabbing. I caught him telling our commander about the girl I had fallen in love when we were kids, and how I'd sworn to marry her one day. He talked about...separation of class in 12, and how Merchants and Seam rarely married and how I mooned over you… I just, I had to punch his lights out to get him to stop talking. Of course when he woke up, he remembered nothing. But Duartyr announced the new stations later that week and I have a feeling he knew I just wanted to get back here to you. He asked me on the phone if I had gotten married."

"So why would Snow have any interest in me?"

"He seemed to like me when we met. It might just be that he has heard about you from Duartyr, and just wants to meet you. I honestly don't know. But I won't leave your side. I promise."

"And what is it that we haven't discussed," she asked, remembering his phone conversation and how he had blushed bright red.

"Oh...um, children. That is, he asked if I had gotten you pregnant. I told him...we haven't... discussed it."

"What, because everyone assumes I'll just jump into bed with you," she bristled. Peeta inhaled sharply.

"No, because most married people do have children. And no one except for Ryen knows about the contract I signed. So we will probably get that question quite a bit. Just be prepared." She nodded and he leaned back, running his hand through his hair.

"I wish you would stop picking fights, Katniss." Her head jerked up and she frowned.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I feel like I have to walk on eggshells around you. You told me to stop looking so wounded when you said something I disagree with, but here you are, doing the same thing. You say you understand my job and then you get angry with me for doing it. You ask me to take a beating for another man and when I say yes, you turn around and yell at me. You ask me to let you into my heart but then you close yours off. It's like you want me to turn out to be a complete ass, so you'll have a reason to hate me."

"That's not-"

"Please respect me enough not to lie to me." She flinched, despite his gentle tone. "I'm tired of defending myself to you, Katniss. Defending my job, defending my decisions, defending my love for you. I'm just tired. If you continue to fight me on every little thing, it's going to be a long and painful 5 years for the both of us." She sucked in a breath and he looked pained.

"I came running home to check on you because the peacekeeper who killed Cray asked where I live. I was terrified that…" he trailed off and Katniss didn't need him to finish his sentence.

"Are you leaving again?"

"I was going to go around and inform the other soldiers of what has happened. Unless you want me to stay." She shivered and imagined a faceless peacekeeper lurking outside with a rifle. And then she imagined Peeta's strong arms around her. How safe he made her feel, how he swore to protect her. How she knew that he would do anything for her. He was right; she was picking fights and she didn't even understand why she was doing it.

She moved forward and wrapped her arms around his waist. The plastic was cold on her skin but she rested her cheek against his shoulder and his arms automatically wrapped around her.

"I don't know what I would do if...you mean everything to me," he whispered against her hair.

"I don't know what I would do if anything happened to you," she echoed his thoughts. And she meant it. It wasn't just for protection or survival. She knew her feelings for Peeta ran deeper than anything she had ever experienced. He sighed heavily and his arms tightened around her. Never mind that she was confusing the hell out of him; he just wanted to hold her and forget the world.

"Stay with me," she said, moving into his lap.

"Always Katniss," he breathed as he moved into a more comfortable position so that he could hold her properly. He kissed her temple and she closed her eyes.

"Don't leave me again tonight." He nodded and leaned back a little. It was getting late and the day had completely drained him.

"Then let me change and we can go to bed." She nodded and he extracted himself from her arms so he could climb off the bed and strip off the uniform.

She watched in fascination as he peeled the layers off. When he had removed the plastic guard pieces from his legs, shoulders, and chest, Katniss moved off of the bed and over to stand in front of him. He watched her curiously, his hands frozen at his sides. Her hands slid under his shirt and he shivered as her fingers briefly traveled up his chest, before she pushed the plain shirt over his head. She knelt down to unlace his white boots and he stumbled a little, trying to kick them off. Her eyes locked on his, she worked at the white belt and pants. Everything about the uniform screamed Capitol, too much white in her opinion. It didn't suit him and she happily stripped him of everything that, in her mind, represented oppression and devastation and power. He gasped as she yanked the pants down his legs and his hands flew to her shoulders to keep from falling over. He swallowed heavily as her eyes gleamed up at him, reaching down to rake his thumb across her bottom lip. He stood before her in nothing but green shorts, his chest almost gleaming in the moonlight. He felt freer, like she had just released him from some sort of prison.

"That's better," she breathed as she stood, his eyes following her every move. "Now the Peacekeeper is gone. It's just my boy with the bread here with me." His heart hammered at the mention of him being her anything.

"Your...what?" She leaned in and kissed his jaw, her palm flat over his heart, as if she was trying to keep it from flying out of his chest.

"My boy with the bread. It's what I have always called you in my mind. Ever since that day that you saved me. It's why it's so hard to see you in that uniform, because to me you'll always just be the sweet baker's son who saved my life." He tilted her chin and nuzzled her cheek. He tried to be wary...he tried to listen to her words closely and not focus on how warm her skin felt. But his heart had always lead his actions, and she was his heart. So he closed his eyes and rested his other hand on her back.

"When you put that uniform on, it's like...like you become someone else...someone who is cold and calculated and works for the man I despise. I have to find a way to separate the two, to remember that it's really you in there and not a cold-hearted monster. I told you that you're good and just, and I still mean that but it's strange to see that side of you. I will try, though," she added hastily, placing both of her hands on his chest. "I know that this is who you are too, or at least, who you have to be now. I know you sometimes struggle between your duties and your gentle disposition. I know I don't make it too easy for you either." He chuckled lightly at that; she didn't make anything easy.

"I don't mean to make you feel like you have to defend everything," she continued hesitantly. "I don't want to change you or make you feel like I'm disappointed in you...you got that enough with your mother. You don't need it from me too." He squeezed back tears, and her hand rested on his cheek.

"I'm proud of you for what you have become, Peeta," she said softly and his eyes flew open. "I know it doesn't seem like it...and I won't tell you it's easy to see you as a Peacekeeper...but I also know that it wasn't really your choice. You took what someone did to you, and you made the best of it, and you haven't lost yourself in the process. I'm sorry that I thought you did. Life has always been a constant struggle but you're right, we just have to make the best of it if we can." She stood on her tiptoes and kissed him hard on the lips. He started to speak but her tongue on his lips made all his thoughts disappear and his arms slid around her waist, lifting her up so he could deepen the kiss. But she leaned her head back sooner than he would have liked, a serious look on her face.

"I would never ask you to take Gale's punishment as your own," she said firmly. "Especially since it was his brother who did it. I appreciate you saying you would but I wouldn't ask that from you. But I hope we can find some way to save him."

"Oh, I forgot to tell you," he said softly, setting her back down and going over to his discarded uniform.

"Tell me what?" He pulled the pockets out and withdrew a folded paper, holding it out for her to take. Her brow furrowed curiously as she took it and read aloud.

"Official Pardon for convicted vandal, Gale Hawthorne of District 12. Clemency granted by Commander Alistair Cray, Head Peacekeeper of District 12 and

Commander of Panem. Fine collected from convicted, debt paid, case closed." She looked up at him with wide eyes.

"Cray didn't write this."

"I found it on his desk. Must have had a change of heart before he died." She shook her head and moved closer to him.

"You could get into trouble."

"I won't. Cray said he would have let Gale go if he wasn't so worried that the Capitol peacekeepers would think he was being too lenient. I don't altogether believe that but now he doesn't have to worry anymore."

"What about the others? That man, Jacobson?"

"Don't worry about him, Katniss. This is an official pardon with Cray's seal. He can't do anything about it now." She dropped the paper and flung her arms around his neck, her lips crashing down onto his. He released a small groan as he picked her up and carried her over to the bed. He lowered her onto her back but she pulled him down on top of her, their lips melded together. It was then that he noticed the short satin gown she was sleeping in and he leaned back to survey her with wide eyes.

"I like this," he fingered the edge of the silky material.

"Madge gave it to me," she breathed.

"Remind me to thank her." He bent to kiss her again, his lips dipping low to trace along her neck and throat. She threw her head back onto the pillow and moaned his name, his hips jerking against hers. His hand moved up from her stomach to palm her breast, and she whined when he tweaked her nipple through the gown.

"Peeta," she panted and with a growl, he pulled the gown down so he could lavish her breasts with his tongue. She gripped his hair as he took her mound in his mouth, his hand closing around the other. Her panties were uncomfortably wet and she squirmed underneath him. He quickly flipped them over, so that she was straddling his lap, and he wrapped her legs around his waist. She was uncertain for only a moment until he pulled her for another kiss. She leaned forward and they both gasped as their centers aligned.

"Oh shit, Katniss, do that again," he groaned against her lips. She wasn't sure what she had done, only that she wanted it to happen again. She rotated her hips and felt his erection hit her in just the right place.

"Fuck," he said through gritted teeth, his hands moving to her back and impatiently pushing the gown over her head. His palms sprawled across her shoulders, they moved to caress every inch of her back until they moved lower to cup her ass. She jumped and moved so quickly that she felt a jolt and a high-pitched whine escaped from the back of her throat. His hand slid into her panties and gripped her cheek so tightly, she knew there would be a mark. The thought secretly thrilled her. She leaned forward and sucked at his throat, relishing the feel of his adam's apple bobbing up and down beneath her tongue. One hand still gripping her ass, while the fingers of his other hand moved to clench her thigh, he gently pulled her forward to grind against him while he thrust up into her. The sensations made both of them moan and he repeated the motions, pulling and pushing, bucking his hips, increasing the pace, as their pleasure heightened. He pulled her in for a rough kiss and she was shocked at how much she enjoyed his assault on her mouth. His hand fisted in her hair as she clutched his shoulders, feeling herself chasing that wonderful feeling she had come to associate with Peeta.

"Oh my...shit! Katniss! Shit!" He stilled underneath her and she tossed her head back as the waves crashed. She fell forward, resting her forehead on his shoulder as she panted and struggled to find her breath. His arms wrapped around her, while his hand slowly trailed up and down her back. When she was able to move again, he cleared his throat.

"I should, um...I should probably clean up."

"'Kay," she said tiredly, moving to the side. She felt sticky and sweaty but she didn't want to get out of bed. When he moved to the edge, she saw a large wet spot on his shorts. His eyes followed hers and his cheeks reddened.

"Sorry about that."

"Why are you sorry? That was supposed to happen, wasn't it?"

"I just mean, I didn't mean to lose control like that. I wanted to get you off and I wasn't thinking… it just felt good and I couldn't stop. I didn't mean to be rough with you."

"If it felt as good for you as it did for me, Peeta...we will have to do it again sometime." His ears turned red as well but he gave her a grin that was both sweet and incredibly sexy.

"I'd really love that, Katniss." He leaned forward to kiss her forehead before he hurried into the bathroom. Sighing, she collapsed against the pillows and stared at the ceiling. Would they become more intimate as time went on? Sex lead to babies, she knew that. And he had constantly told her he didn't expect anything like that, yet he was obviously fully agreeable to everything they had done thus far. Would he expect to go further? She wanted to. She wondered if he had access to Capitol birth control, like condoms. They were discouraged in the districts but she knew where to find some in the black market, if she was careful. Of course it probably wasn't a good idea, now that Cray had been killed and the new Head Peacekeeper was said to be worse than Cray.

Did she want that with Peeta? She had never thought of doing this with Gale, or anyone else for that matter. So yes, obviously she wanted to explore that with him. And he had confessed that he was fairly inexperienced himself. They could learn together, she supposed.

"I can hear your thoughts racing from here," he said teasingly from the doorway. She jumped at being called out and watched him remove the towel from his waist to slide on some clean underwear. He dug around in his drawer for some pajamas and gasped when he turned to find her right behind him. He sucked in a breath and shook his head.

"The Huntress approaches," he chuckled nervously. But her eyes were lowered, focused on his underwear. She reached out and dragged a finger down his stomach; his muscles clenched and contracted and he bit his lip to stay in control.

"I've never seen you wear these before."

"Oh...yeah, um, they gave us some in training. It's supposed to be...easier to wear under our uniforms. Keeps…" he cleared his throat loudly. "Keeps things in place."

"I like it," she said softly and his hands clenched by his side. He silently decided tomorrow, he would order twenty more. She stood in front of him, her hands splayed over his thighs and slowly moving up, admiring his strong legs. The waistband rested low on his hips and her fingers drifted along the band, her eyes resting on the V shape of his abs. He steadied his breathing but shook his head and reached down to grasp her wrists.

"Katniss," he said through gritted teeth. "Since I seem to lose all control around you, you might not want to touch me like that right now." Her hands froze and she tucked them under her arms, her face burning. He moved forward to cup her chin.

"Do not mistake that for me not wanting you to touch me. I just figured... we should probably get some sleep tonight."

"Yeah. Yeah, you're right," she mumbled, moving past him. He gripped her arm and pulled her in for a kiss before she could protest.

"Tomorrow night," he whispered against her lips, making her shiver, "I'll welcome your explorations and wandering hands. But tomorrow, I'll need to leave at sunrise to welcome the Capitol men." She nodded and silently continued on her way to the bathroom. Peeta bent to pick up her gown and softly knocked on the bathroom door.

"Thought you might want to put this back on," he passed it through the small crack and with a smile, he returned to the bed. By the time she was finished, he had pulled the covers back and had pushed the window open to allow the cool night breeze to enter the room. She settled on her side and he reached over her to turn out the light.

"Sleep well," he said in her ear, pressing a soft kiss to her temple. He settled behind her and she allowed him to slide his arm underneath her so she could rest against his chest. She backed her head up so that she was sharing his pillow and closed her eyes at the feel of his warm breath on the back of her neck. She determinedly chased all of her unpleasant thoughts out of her head and out the window; she knew tomorrow might bring trouble and she tried not to think about what the Hawthorne family would say when she told them that Gale must stop hunting. She knew Gale was planning to teach his brothers how to hunt and trap as well. But she had to do what she could to keep them all safe.

The thoughts would not leave, she huffed as she moved her head. Peeta unconsciously pulled her in closer, burying his nose into her hair. She relaxed at the feel of his arms tightening around her, his bare chest pressed against her back, and the steady flow of his breathing. Soon enough, his soft snores became her lullaby and her brain finally allowed her to close her eyes and join him in sleep.

* * *

Peeta was gone by the time she woke up. There was a brief note on the pillow that told her he had made breakfast, to stay inside until he returned home, which would be soon, and not to open the door to anyone.

We will take some bread to the Hawthornes together when I return.

Katniss doubted very much that the Hawthornes would accept anything from Peeta. Hazelle might be reasonable but if one of the boys was painting crude words about her, she didn't think they would be very hospitable towards her. Still, they needed to know what Peeta had done for them. And he could reinforce the importance of her warning: Stay out of the woods.

Would Gale listen? Probably not. They had both been defying the Capitol since they were young. It was that or watch their families starve to death. Katniss still felt bitter toward the Capitol for making life difficult, almost impossible, but she realized that even if Peeta worked for them, he did feel differently about the regime than other peacekeepers might. And why shouldn't he? He had grown up in 12, where they had nothing. Even life as a Merchant was difficult and uncertain. Katniss knew that but she knew Gale, as well as many others from the Seam, saw things differently. Still, she had to try. She couldn't just sit by and watch her friends be whipped, or worse.

She trudged to the kitchen and her spirits lifted when she saw cheesebuns on the counter. Her husband certainly knew how much she loved these. Feeling slightly restless, she walked around the living room with a cheesebun in hand, until she grabbed a book from his shelf and plopped down on the couch to read. She'd never had a lot of free time so she wasn't sure how to handle it or what to do with herself. But she did her best to relax, as she read and munched on the rest of her breakfast. Peeta would be back soon, she told herself. Stop worrying so much.

* * *

Peeta rose before the sun did and quickly dressed in his uniform. He spent longer in the bathroom than he usually did, tending to his appearance. He knew several of the Peacekeepers had complained about being in 12, saying how filthy everything was and how disgusting everyone smelled. He wanted to make a good impression with the new men and he styled his hair as he had done on important days back in 2. Glancing in the mirror, he remembered Katniss's words about how he became a different person when he put on this uniform. He didn't want to believe it but he knew she was right. His eyes locked on his reflection as he tried to hold onto the baker's son that she had said she waited for. Her boy with the bread, she had called him. That was it. That was the part he would hold onto, no matter what happened. If Katniss could love him for the monster he had become, he must not be all bad, right? No. She said she still saw goodness in him, that she knew her boy with the bread was still inside the peacekeeper. She said she was proud of the man he had become.

It was the first time he had heard those words since he had returned home. He didn't expect any kind words from his mother, of course, but his father had barely mentioned Peeta's new position. At first Peeta thought it might just be too painful… he had essentially lost two sons and didn't know if he would see them again. But now Peeta wondered if his father was ashamed of what he had been trained to do. He knew things needed to change; he acknowledged the pain and suffering all over the country, how the Capitol used citizens of Panem to satisfy the sickening bloodlust that had emerged within the Capitolites. He hoped one day things would improve, and that their next president would help the people, rather than hurt.

But Peeta prided himself on loyalty and he learned at an early age that duty was everything. It's what his mother taught him when she started dragging him from his bed at the crack of dawn when he was only 4. When he was put to work in the bakery and learned that life was about hard work. He didn't often get to play with his friends after school, because he had to rush home to help his family with the bakery crowds. Only after she discovered that he might earn a scholarship for wrestling did his mother allow him to attend wrestling practices in the afternoon. Ryen and Peeta were the best but if it came down to it, Mrs. Mellark would allow Ryen to stay for practice and insist that "someone" had to help at the bakery. That someone was always him.

It was the same lesson in District 2. Their commanders had hammered into their heads that the Capitol cared for them and each district supplied the Capitol, like blood to a heart. In return, the Capitol provided order and security. To refuse work was to put the entire system in danger. The Capitol was the beating heart of Panem and nothing can survive without a heart. Which is why Peacekeepers were needed, to protect the order and to regulate the system. It was the speech Peeta heard every day at training, before the Commanders and Captains sent them to break up any rebellious activity, or punish wrongdoers who were traitors in the Capitol's eyes. For nearly four years, Peeta considered himself a Loyalist.

But if he was being honest with himself, he would always have district blood in him. He would always remember how his own district struggled, how his friends and his family worked themselves to death, and how the love of his life had to resort to illegal activity just to keep herself and her family fed. And it was all "for the good of Panem", they had told him repeatedly. His commander had liked to pretend that Peeta and Ryen were from District 2. There was one other young man from the districts, taken from his family the same night Peeta and Ryen were. Shuck had been the strong-silent type, according to their superior. He had dark skin and hard eyes and never spoke more than two words. But his strength had impressed even the Capitol Peacekeepers. Peeta well remembered a day when Commander Duartyr had ordered Ryen and Shuck to face off against one another. Peeta had to carry his nearly-unconscious brother back to the barracks that afternoon. But Shuck had disappeared not long after he had arrived. Duartyr never told them what had become of the man from District 11, and no one ever asked. Peeta had put him out of his head so he could concentrate on becoming an excellent Peacekeeper. After Shuck vanished, Duaryr started telling other soldiers that Ryen and Peeta were born in 2. They never corrected him.

To question how things were was treason, so Peeta never mentioned it. He'd wanted to know Duartyr's real feelings on things. Was all of 2 like the Capitol and truly believed 23 children deserved to be slaughtered each year? Or were the people of 2 like everyone else in the districts; waiting for better days?

Peeta was lost in his thoughts as he approached the Justice Building. Two of his men immediately saluted him and he nodded to them as he passed. Inside he

found several men he did not recognize, though only one was taller than he was.

"Good morning. I'm First Lieutenant Mellark. Welcome to District 12."

"Our Commander would like to speak with you, Lieutenant," one of them gestured to the room behind him. With a tight grip on his helmet, Peeta nodded and knocked on the door. He heard a soft 'enter' and pushed the door open.

He had only met Romulus Thread once and luckily, it was very brief. A few days after his 17th birthday, he had been pulled out of training for a meeting with Commander Duartyr. Ryen was there, as well as several of his bunkmates that he got along well with. Another man stood in the corner, his hands folded in front of him and a large rifle strapped to his shoulders. He had cold blue eyes and thinning grey hair, with the build of a Career tribute. Peeta wondered if this was a Hunger Games Victor, come to meet the new peackeepers. Did Victors do that? He had no idea but the man's eyes had studied them intently while he'd remained silent.

"I'll be brief, soldiers. This is Commander Romulus Thread, of District 1. You might recognize him from several years ago, when his brother won the 72nd Hunger Games and the year after when his sister came in 2nd place in the 73rd Hunger Games. Commander Thread's family has brought pride to District 1 and to Panem, and now Commander Thread is Head Peacekeeper in District 1. He wishes to speak to you all now."

"Thank you, Commander Duartyr," the man said in a raspy voice. He stepped forward and his icy eyes swept the room. "President Snow himself appointed me and I maintain order by whatever means necessary. Now Commander Duartyr has recommended you five for a particular mission, so I expect to see the best from you. Debriefing will be at zero four hundred hours. We will leave soon after that. That is all." Without another word, Thread stalked out of the tent and Duartyr cleared his throat.

"Alright men, return to your training."

"Are we supposed to take all of our possessions with us, sir? He didn't even tell us where we are going," Carl said uncertainly. Peeta's eyes darted from Carl to his commander.

"It's not your job to ask questions, soldier, only to follow orders." Carl bowed his head, his jaw clenched.

"Dismissed." The men started to file out of the tent, when Duartyr cleared his throat.

"Soldiers Mellark. A word." Peeta and Ryen froze and Duartyr folded his hands behind his back.

"Commander Thread wishes to speak to you both." He disappeared from the tent and Peeta felt himself starting to shake.

"Breathe," Ryen muttered out of the corner of his mouth. Peeta took a deep breath and closed his eyes until he heard the tent flap opening.

"So these are our soldiers from District 12." Peeta opened his eyes and found Thread taking them in. "You're a subject of interest in the Capitol, you know."

"Why is that sir," Ryen asked and Peeta wanted to stamp on his foot. No questions. Duartyr was big on that rule and he imagined that Thread was even worse. Luckily, Thread made no comments about Ryen's impertinence.

"Surely you know that, boy," Peeta could tell that Ryen was holding back a retort; he hated to be called 'boy' by anyone, and everyone in 2 either called him 'Soldier' or 'Peacekeeper'.

"District 12 is notably one of the more unruly districts in Panem," the commander went on to say. "It was a controversy when you two were accepted into the peacekeeper ranks. President Snow is anxious to meet with you. He is curious what you two possess to make you worthy of being here in District 2, as am I. Your Commander Duartyr, however, speaks very highly of you. Which one of you is called Peeta?" Peeta swallowed and stepped forward.

"I am Peeta, sir."

"Your father is a baker?"

"That's correct, Commander." Thread sniffed.

"Perhaps I'll have you boys bake me some bread sometime, to see if you measure up to Capitol bakers." Peeta remained silent although he could tell Ryen was having trouble. Be quiet Rye, he tried to reach his brother telepathically.

"Well, PeetAH, Commander Duartyr has much to say about you especially. He says your strength is unmatched and your skill with a blade is impressive. I wonder why you haven't volunteered for the Hunger Games." When Peeta didn't answer, Thread sneered.

"Ah I forgot. District 12 has never had a volunteer before. You all cower before the power of the Capitol. Your escort, Effie Trinkett, has begged to be reassigned to another district. Reapings in 12 are a sight to see, from what I hear." Thread moved around the two brothers, sizing them up.

"You have decent builds. But I have seen much stronger. I hope I'm not making a mistake by choosing you for this mission."

"We will not let you down, Commander," Peeta said firmly. Thread nodded.

"Good. You're both dismissed." Peeta and Ryen moved stiffly and quickly and did not speak until they were back in their barracks.

"Where do you think he's sending us?"

"The Capitol," Carl whispered, glancing at the door.

"Why would there be a special mission the Capitol?" Ryen shook his head. "What do you think, Peet?"

"Probably somewhere East, like District 5. Or further than that."

"You don't think they'd send us...home, do you," Ryen mumbled. Peeta shrugged.

"It's not our job to ask questions."

"Just to follow orders. Ok Peeta, you're starting to sound just like them." Peeta didn't speak; instead he focused on cleaning his rifle and thinking about the upcoming mission.

They didn't see Thread again after that. Apparently, he had left right after the meeting and Duartyr said he was needed in the Capitol. Duartyr was the one who revealed the mission; a group of rebels hiding near District 11. Peeta felt his throat tighten; it was so close to home. Duartyr said that the 5 soldiers would join a top secret operative to execute the rebels and join the peacekeepers in District 11 to squash any rebellious activity.

The mission went off like clockwork. District 11 peacekeepers lead the soldiers to the rebels' supposed hideout and they attacked when the men were sleeping. Peeta was sickened to see that some of the rebels were younger than he was. The soldiers from 2 opened fire on the sleeping men and no one even had the chance to fight back. They spent several days in 11, listening to their Mayor talk about the dangers of rebellion and how the Capitol protected them. When they returned to 2, Duartyr awarded them Defense Medals and praised them for their timely actions. He also issued them invitations to the Capitol, from President Snow himself.

Peeta cried into his pillow the whole night.

* * *

Thread looked older, with the same intense cruelty in his eyes. He peered at Peeta over the paper he was reading.

"Ah, Soldier Mellark."

"Welcome to District 12, Commander Thread," Peeta stood straight-backed with his hands behind his back.

"I'll get right to it, Lieutenant. General Duartyr says you can be trusted and after your actions in Districts 6 and 11, I feel that you can too. I did have my doubts when I first met you, but you can't help where you come from. I have read reports of your leadership and you have received high praise from your superiors in 1, 2, and the Capitol. So well done."

"Thank you very much, Commander."

"You have undoubtedly heard about Commander Cray?"

"I have, sir. As I understand it, the Minister of Defense has not been pleased with him for some time." Thread looked a little surprised.

"You are correct. Minister Antonius instructed me to dispose of him and to reinstate certain laws that we have been neglecting to follow in certain districts. Have you heard of any kind of illegal activity occurring in your district, Lieutenant?"

"No Commander. Nothing that I am aware of."

"But you have just returned from 2 not long ago, isn't that right?"

"Yes sir, that's correct. I have not seen or heard anything since my return, though. Has there been a report?"

"Military operatives have picked up radio signals with rebellious content. It's just past the district line so it could be someone in 12, or someone in 11. We need to find them and dispose of them. I understand there is an electric fence on the border?"

"Yes sir, but to my knowledge, is has never worked."

"It does now," Thread said with an evil smile. "It was turned on shortly after my arrival."

"Good," Peeta nodded. "That will make the people feel safer for certain."

"Some of the soldiers have reported to me of several people who often go past the fence and hunt illegally. Do you have any knowledge of this?" Peeta felt his throat tighten.

"No sir. I have never seen anyone past the fence."

"One of them is a young woman. She is said to be quite stealthy. I want you to set a trap for her."

"Of- of course, sir. What kind of-"

"Be creative. I want these people caught and made examples of. I have added a new whipping post as well as a pillory. And a gallows is being erected in the center of town. I understand public execution is not common in 12?"

"No sir. Most of the executions are carried out in the jail." In fact, Peeta did not know of an actual execution in at least ten years. Whippings were rare and when Cray was sober enough to punish someone, he sent his peacekeepers to rough up the convicted a little bit. Despite the harsh conditions 12 lived under, they didn't have to fear a lot of retaliation as far as the military went. People primarily died from starvation or illness due to lack of proper diet.

It seemed that was about to change.

"Did you ever whip anyone in 2, Lieutenant?" Peeta felt it getting more and more difficult to breathe.

"Yes sir." Thread nodded in approval.

"Good. I feared no one in 12 would understand torture."

"General Duartyr taught me well," Peeta replied in a hollow tone.

"Glad to hear it. I have some files I need to review this morning and then I would like for you to show me around the district."

"It would be my honor sir. I have some paperwork I need to attend to as well. Would you like for me to escort you to your office, or would you prefer to take this one?"

"This one works just fine. Where is your office?"

"Right across the hall, sir. The Mayor is down that way to the right, if you need to speak to him at any given time." Thread nodded and picked up another file.

"Thank you, Lieutenant Mellark. I will let you know when I am finished." Peeta nodded and was almost out the door when he heard Thread clear his throat.

"Just a minute, Lieutenant." Peeta froze, his hand on the door knob.

"Sir?"

"I have a report here of vandalism of Capitol property. Gale Hawthorne, it says. Convicted and sentenced to being whipped in the square. Has this been carried out?"

"No sir," Peeta calmly walked back to the commander's desk and reached into his jacket. "Commander Cray gave this to me yesterday, to deliver to you. The convicted was fined but the sentence was revoked. We collected the debt yesterday and let him go." Thread took the paper with a frown.

"Why would Cray pardon him?"

"I don't know the details, Commander, I just follow orders." Thread's mouth was a thin line as he folded the pardons and slid it into a file.

"Very well. I presume the vandalism has been tended to?"

"Yes sir. Gone completely, from what I hear."

"Fine. We can't exactly ask Cray why he suddenly decided the guilty party doesn't deserve a lashing but you said you have already collected the debt?"

"And presented him with official pardons. I'm afraid there could be trouble if we decided to act differently at this point." Thread scowled.

"Very well. Keep an eye on him though. I'm sure he's trouble. You will have to fill me in on this...class divide in the district since I am sure you are more familiar with it than anyone." Peeta's fist clenched in his pocket.

"Of course, Commander." Thread nodded and went back to thumbing through the files so Peeta excused himself as quickly as he could.

* * *

"Morning Lieutenant," Ryen said hesitantly, peering into his brother's office.

"Come on in, Soldier Mellark." Ryen closed the door and bit his lip.

"Well you're still in one piece so I guess Katniss didn't rip you apart last night."

"We're ok, Rye. I may need your help on something though." He dropped his voice as he told Ryen about his conversation with Katniss, the forged pardons, and Cray's death. Ryen's jaw dropped.

"Cray is dead?"

"On Antonius's orders, it seems."

"Why would the Minister of Security be so concerned about District 12?"

"There is something happening in Panem, Rye. Something big. Duartyr being promoted to General, Thread coming here, rebellious radio activity nearby. Something's going on."

"You think...rebellion is starting up again?"

"Shut up," Peeta said hurriedly, his eyes darting to the door. Ryen clamped his mouth shut.

"You know better than to talk about that. I don't know what's happening, but these things can't be coincidences."

"So Thread accepted the pardon? Have you told Katniss?"

"Yes and we are going over to the Hawthornes to inform them. The little shit who committed the crime should understand that his brother very nearly escaped a beating far worse than any we have seen." Ryen winced and Peeta's face fell.

"I only meant-"

"So do you think Hawthorne will heed your warning," Ryen cut him off.

"Thread said the fence has been turned on. And I know he wouldn't hesitate to torture anyone he finds out of bounds. We just have to make sure everyone understands that."

"And you said he knows about her?"

"He knows what some of these scumbag soldiers have told him. That there have been reports of people crossing the fence to hunt. He doesn't know anything about them though. Names, appearances-"

"The fact that you married one of them," Ryen said with a grin. Peeta scowled in return.

"I made sure to stress this to Katniss, and I'll do the same with the Hawthornes. I don't know how long Thread will stay in 12 but they can't go near the woods while he's here."

"What about Jacobson? You said he knows that Katniss hunts. Think you have to worry about him?"

"Duarty'rs recommendation of me is my saving grace right now. Thread says he feels like he can trust me and you know that he likes people in power. He hasn't made any comments about my station but I feel like he will be more inclined to listen to me over Jacobson."

"Just be careful, Peet. I know you want to keep Katniss safe but you have to look after yourself too."

"Don't worry about me, Rye," he shook his head. "How's toasting plans coming along?"

"Oh man." Peeta smiled as his brother launched into the newest complications (courtesy of Madge's mother, again) and was grateful for the change in topic.

"So now she is saying we need two cakes...two! Peet, most people in 12 barely have one cake. Just some bread and maybe a danish or something."

"I'm sure the Mayor's family is used to things being fancy. A smaller cake for you won't be hard."

"It's not necessary either," he protested. "People are starving in 12. Why would I use more flour and sugar for something we don't even need?"

"What does Madge say about it?"

"She wants to appease her mother but she agrees one cake is enough. I might just say we forgot about it. We do have a lot to do before Friday." There was a knock at the door and Ryen froze. Peeta stood and gestured for him to stand against the wall.

"Commander Thread," he nodded respectively, opening the door wider.

"I've finished with those files, Lieutenant, and was hoping you could show me around? Peacekeeper Murphy said you were planning to leave early today."

"Oh...yes sir, my mother-in-law is feeling ill and we had planned to take her some soup."

"I didn't know you were married," he glanced around Peeta's office. "Do you have a picture of her?"

"We were wed just last week. Actually, Commander Cray granted me some personal time to stay at home with my new bride."

"I would like to meet her sometime."

"Of course, sir. You remember my brother, Commander?"

"Soldier Mellark," Thread nodded to Ryen. "General Duartyr said he was impressed with your high test scores and your skillset."

"Thank you, Commander," Ryen bowed his head. "I will see you later on, Lieutenant." Peeta nodded and Ryen saluted Thread before lowering his hand and exiting the office. Peeta cleared his throat and collected his helmet from his desk.

"After you, Commander."

* * *

Thread's nose remained wrinkled for the majority of their tour. As they approached the Seam, he actually held a handkerchief to his nose.

"How do you stand the smell, Mellark?"

"Oh you get used to it, sir," Peeta shrugged. "I grew up not far from here. In town."

"What is this area called?"

"This is the Seam, Commander."

"District 12 does not seem that big."

"I suppose not, compared to District 2 or the Capitol. But this is the border. The fence you spoke of is just up there."

"So whoever hunts illegally must come from the Seam. Are all of your troublemakers from this area?"

"Not necessarily, sir. In fact, most of the fights we have intercepted have been in town. People from the Seam are hard workers. You see there? Those are our coal mines. Most people around these parts are coal miners."

"So I suppose it's lucky that you became a peacekeeper?"

"Oh my family owns the bakery in town. On the other side of the district is where the Merchants live and work." Thread frowned and gestured to a row of houses.

"What are those?"

"Houses, Commander. People often sleep three or four to a bedroom," he remembered being inside Katniss's house for the first time, just days ago. He hadn't seen the whole thing but he could tell it was run down and tiny. Thread scowled and Peeta briefly wondered if the peacekeeper would say something about how he would speak to President Snow about these miserable living conditions.

But Thread just sniffed and held the handkerchief over his face.

"Disgusting. How people live this way is beyond me." Peeta clenched his fists behind his back. They don't choose this you son of a bitch, he cursed in his mind. But he tightened his jaw and his eyes sort of glazed over. He had perfected this in 2, when he quickly learned the difference between the people there and the people back home in 12.

"Let's continue. Have your living quarters been assigned, Commander?"

"The Minister of Security said I am free to move into Cray's house. Where is that?"

"It's actually quite close to my family's bakery. Would you like for me to take you there?"

"Actually, you can take me to your family's bakery next. I'm eager to try District 12 bread." Peeta's mother would probably throw a fit if he brought the Head Peacekeeper into their shop, but he didn't have much of a choice, so he nodded and changed direction.

"Our Peacekeeper quarters are right over that hill. My house is just there at the end of the path. If you ever need anything, don't hesitate to knock."

"You are more hospitable than people in the Capitol, Lieutenant," Thread remarked, his brow raised. Peeta shrugged.

"It's the way I was raised, sir." Thread merely 'hmmed' and followed Peeta toward town.

"This is Merchant Circle, where most of the shops are. Merchants typically have a trade, like baking or making shoes."

"Where do people go to eat around here?"

"We only have one restaurant, Commander, and it just recently opened. Typically we eat our meals at home."

"Strange," the peacekeeper shook his head. Peeta knew Cray had frequented the Hob but he didn't want to mention the black market to Thread until he absolutely had to.

"Does your wife work in one of these shops, or does she just stay at home?"

"My wife helps my family in the bakery a lot," he lied quickly. "But lately she has been assisting the Mayor's daughter with her wedding plans."

"Madge Undersee is getting married?" Peeta didn't bother asking how Thread knew Madge's name. He assumed as the Mayor's daughter, most officials would know of her but it still surprised him. Sometimes their districts seemed worlds apart, and Peeta couldn't ever see himself as selfish and unfeeling as some of the people he had met.

"She is indeed, sir. To my brother, Ryen." Thread's brow quirked.

"Indeed? Well I will have to pass on my congratulations to him. When is the wedding?"

"Friday. Here is the Mellark Bakery, Commander." Peeta held the door open for Thread and stood aside.

His eyes widened when he saw not only his parents behind the counter, but also Madge, Katniss, and Prim inside. Katniss looked shocked and her eyes darted to the ground anxiously. Peeta inhaled sharply, trying to keep his temper in check but damn it, could she not follow a simple task?

"Peeta, what a surprise," his father called. His mother eyed Thread's uniform nervously.

"Good morning, everyone. This is Commander Romulus Thread, our new Head Peacekeeper."

"Welcome Commander," his mother said softly, her eyes darting from her son to the new Head.

"Lieutenant Mellark has been telling me about how delicious District 12 bread is," Thread said with a slight sneer, as if he didn't believe it could be appetizing. "I asked him to show me around the district and thought we would stop in for some."

"Of course, sir," the baker bowed his head. "Step over here and tell me what kind looks best to you." Katniss sucked in a breath as Peeta approached them.

"Peeta-"

"What part of stay inside until I return was unclear to you," he hissed, his lips barely moving.

"Hey, don't talk to her that way," Prim whispered angrily.

"I'm trying to keep you safe. All of you," Peeta said with a sharp glare.

"Peeta it was my fault," Madge said, glancing over at Thread, who was talking with Peeta's father. "I wanted to discuss cake options with your father and went to your house to ask Katniss to join me. Mrs. Everdeen had left Prim with her so I asked both girls to come with me. She said she'd better not but I wheedled. Don't be angry with her." Peeta glanced back at Thread and sighed.

"Fine. Katniss, Commander Thread wishes to meet you." Katniss looked terrified as Peeta's hand remained steady on her back. "Commander Thread, this is my wife Katniss, her sister, Primrose, and Mayor Undersee's daughter, Madge." Thread's eyes swept across the women and narrowed on Katniss.

"Your wife?"

"Pleased to meet you, Commander Thread," Katniss bowed her head in respect. Thread stared at her as if expecting her to curtsy or bow or kiss his hand. Peeta watched the two of them with baited breath.

"The pleasure is mine, Mrs. Mellark."

"Here is your bread, Commander Thread," his mother said quickly, placing the wrapped loaf on the counter.

"Shall we continue our tour, Commander?"

"Yes. Thank you for the bread, Mr. and Mrs. Mellark. I shall see you soon, I expect, Miss Undersee. And you as well, Mrs. Mellark. And it was a pleasure, Miss…?" He looked at Prim expectantly.

"Everdeen, Commander," Prim bowed her head. Thread's eyes narrowed and he glanced at Katniss, then back at Prim. Peeta could see comprehension in Thread's eyes and he hastily pushed the door open.

"I will be home soon, sweetheart, and we can go check on your mother together." Katniss's brow furrowed in confusion as Peeta lead Thread from the bakery.

"Check on Mother," Prim asked Katniss in bemusement. "What is he talking about?"

"We should probably get home," Madge said softly. "Mr. and Mrs. Mellark, perhaps it would be better if we came back later. With Peeta and Ryen." Mr. Mellark's eyes went past them and out the window as he nodded.

"Yes, dear, I think that would be best." Madge grabbed Katniss's and Prim's hands and pulled them out of the bakery, not releasing them until they were locked back inside Peeta's house.

* * *

 _ **Ok, so some people are probably going to comment on how cordial Thread is being- since we only see Thread briefly, he is an interesting character to write. Hopefully I dropped enough hints though that this will not be a good thing for District 12- or for Peeta. Sorry about the long wait but I already have the next chapter partially finished so will def try to post again next week :)**_

 _ **have a great week everyone! XOXO**_


	19. Chapter 19

"Here are your quarters, Commander," Peeta gestured toward Cray's large house. "I instructed the men to remove Cray's body this morning, so after some cleaning and some organizing, you will be free to move in."

"Excellent," Thread nodded, surveying the house. "Is that your Victor's Village, beyond those trees?"

"Yes sir. Haymitch Abernathy lives in that third one there."

"The houses are tiny. Did you visit Victor's Village in 1 and 2?"

"Yes sir, the mayors showed me around. The houses were stunning."

"I suppose anything would be bigger than this," Thread looked around, wrinkling his nose again. Peeta's nostrils flared. He was getting sick of this man insulting his home and everything he knew.

"Well I'm afraid that's about all there is to see. I can escort you back to the Justice Building before I leave for the day."

"Ah yes. You said your wife's mother has fallen ill?"

"We hope it's just a common cold. Her mother is our main Healer in 12. She has saved a lot of people in the past."

"Everdeen is her name?" Peeta swallowed as he nodded.

"That's correct."

"I have heard the name before, I believe. And your wife's coloring is not the same as yours." Peeta's blood was boiling.

"She was born in the Seam, Commander." Thread did not look surprised by this.

"Indeed? And her sister...Primrose, is it? She resembles you more than she does her sister."

"Their mother is Merchant, and their father is Seam. It is not unheard of to have marriages between the two classes."

"So I was right. You would know more about this class divide than anyone else."

"Color and class mean nothing to me, Commander. I fell in love with Katniss when I was just a boy. I was lucky enough to win her heart when I returned home after so many years of being away."

"Luck indeed." Peeta didn't like the way the peacekeeper was looking at him, with his mouth curling up into a wicked smile.

"Anyway sir, I should be getting home to my wife. If you need anything at all, you have my number."

"I thank you for your time, Lieutenant," Thread called as Peeta scurried back down the path as quick as possible. "This tour proved...most interesting." The hairs on the back of his neck stood up straight as he tried not to run back to his house.

* * *

When he entered, he threw the helmet onto the table and paced the kitchen for a moment.

"Peeta?" His head snapped up when he heard her soft voice, as she peered around the corner.

"I'm sorry for losing my temper earlier," he went to her and squeezed her hand. "I'm just terrified-"

"I know," she cut him off. "I'm sorry I didn't listen to you."

"I'd be more surprised if you did," he scoffed as he pulled her into his arms. She could feel his heart racing and she took his face in her hands.

"Is everything ok, Peeta," Madge asked tentatively.

"It's fine. I apologize to you ladies for my sharp tongue earlier," he nodded to Prim and Madge. Prim pursed her lips but Madge shook her head.

"You're just frightened for her. There is no harm in that."

"Madge, I would like to speak to your father later, if he agrees."

"Of course. Why don't you, Rye, and Katniss join us for dinner after we stop by the bakery? Oh Prim, you are more than welcome to come as well."

"Mom is taking me with her to the other side of town," Prim shrugged. "She has to give someone stitches and I want to learn."

"You'll make quite a doctor one day, Prim," Peeta said with a smile.

"12 needs more of those. And a real hospital. My dream is opening one right in the center of town."

"My little duck dreams big," Katniss tugged Prim's braid fondly.

"As she should," Madge nodded. "As we all should."

"I've never really allowed myself to dream," Katniss replied quietly.

"Well now you have a man who is determined to make every single one of them come true," Madge nudged her, winking at Peeta. He took his wife's hand and pulled it to his lips.

"She's not wrong," he said softly.

"Katniss says you guys are taking bread to the Hawthornes," Madge cocked her head.

"And what did you mean about checking on Mom? She's at the Thornes, checking on their new baby."

"I told Thread this morning that I was leaving early because my mother-in-law was ill. I didn't want to say anything else in front of him. And yes, we need to talk to the Hawthornes and I thought they could use some food."

"Gale is too proud for that," Madge scoffed. Peeta's brow shot up; he hadn't known that Madge knew Gale. She even sounded somewhat bitter.

"Too proud to keep his family from starving?"

"I'll try to talk some sense into him," Katniss sighed. "Did Thread accept the pardon?"

"Wait. What pardon?" Madge frowned.

"Cray revoked Gale's sentence before he died," Peeta said quickly. "I passed it on to Thread today and he said the case is closed. But I need to make sure Gale's brothers know how lucky they are, and to keep their heads low, going forward."

"Why would Cray pardon him," Madge shook her head. "That doesn't make sense." Katniss watched Peeta warily. Why was he lying? Didn't he trust Madge?

"I don't know the details. Maybe he knew that Gale didn't really do it, and wanted to go easy on him. All I know is he gave me the pardon, and I gave it to Thread. Gale is safe." Katniss surprised them all by standing on her tiptoes and kissing his cheek.

"Thank you," she said quietly. She at least knew the truth. She knew what Peeta had done and the risk of his actions. Madge had not seen her as overly affectionate; nor had Prim for that matter. But he cupped her chin and smiled.

"Ryen will be off work in a couple of hours and then we can escort you ladies to the bakery. Prim, would you like to accompany us to the Hawthornes?"

"Or you can come over and help me make my bouquet," Madge winked and the younger girl's face lit up.

"Katniss, is it alright if I go?"

"If Mr. and Mrs. Undersee don't mind, I don't either. I'll tell Mom where you are." Prim nodded and Madge draped her arm around Prim's shoulders.

"After Friday, we will all be sisters you know."

"Prim is a demanding sister," Katniss said, trying not to smile.

"Hey!"

"Ok, we have a lot more toasting details to work out so I will see you guys a little later." Prim hugged her sister and turned to Peeta. He watched her curiously, as she seemed to be thinking.

"Coming Prim?"

"In a sec." She reached up to hug him and he returned the embrace.

"I'm so grateful you are keeping her safe," she whispered in his ear. "Just be good to her." She pulled away and gave them both bright smiles before she followed Madge out.

"What did she say to you?" Katniss frowned after Prim and Peeta watched the girls leave.

"She's just being a good sister. I think I will change before we go."

"It's ok for you to be out of uniform? Because I was going to suggest it but I wasn't sure."

"Yeah, I don't think it's a great idea for a peacekeeper to show up at their door, given how they were treated the last time. I want to meet them as me, not Lieutenant Mellark." He kissed her on the forehead before heading into the bedroom.

"Why don't you find some more food to take to them," he called from the closet. "Train is coming in this weekend with more supplies, so we have more than enough." Katniss glanced in the cabinets, biting her lip. She had never had any of this so how was she to know what was ok to give away? By the time Peeta reentered the kitchen, she had gathered an onion and a loaf of bread.

"We can offer them more than that," he said with a smile as he opened the cabinet and started to pull out packages of flour and wheat.

"I just don't know if they will accept all of this," she watched him put things into the basket. "Seam people don't take kindly to charity. We feel like we owe a debt if someone does something nice."

"That's a strange way to look at life," he paused, his hand on another loaf of bread.

"I don't expect you to understand. You've always had enough. But if you'd lived in the Seam, I wouldn't have to explain."

"And don't try. Obviously I'm too dim to get it," he said drily.

"It's like the bread. How I never seem to get over owing you for that."

"Is that why you agreed to me taking over your contract?" She looked up at him quickly and felt a pang at the devastated look on his face. "Because you think you owe me for...that day. That's why you agreed to a toasting?"

"At first...yes. I felt like I owed you for more than just the bread. For saving my life again." He shook his head and slammed the picnic basket closed, his eyes squeezing shut.

"But," she reached for his hand. "Then I realized how good you are and how… I do feel something for you. It's not just about a debt to me anymore."

"Is that supposed to make me feel better," he said heavily, refusing to look at her. "Your feelings for me are only partially because I gave you some bread when we were kids. The other part is because you don't want to owe a debt."

"That's not what I...look Peeta, you may have grown up in town but it was still District 12. We are the poorest district in Panem. Can you honestly tell me that Merchants were much better off than the Seam?"

"No. And I don't think many Merchants are extremely hospitable either. But my father brought us all up to be that way and it's just in my nature."

"I know. And I think that's wonderful. It's what makes you such a good person. But it's Gale's nature to be protective of his family. After his father died, he became the man of the house and had to find food for his two brothers, his sister, and his mother. I had to do the same but it was only Prim and mom. I'm just telling you to look at it both ways is all."

"I just don't understand why someone who is starving wouldn't accept a little help."

"It's just the way things are in the Seam," she shrugged. "We don't like to owe people."

"What if I don't ask for anything in return?"

"Doesn't matter. We will do what we can to settle a debt. Whatever we can, even if it's beyond our means. I have seen grown men who have no food or time to give, work triple shifts so they can settle their debts." Peeta was silent and his lips thinned. She knew he was still thinking of the contract and she hated the pain in his eyes. Her hand covered his, causing him to stiffen.

"I've already told you that I know I feel something real for you. And it has nothing to do with bread or debts and everything to do with your kind heart and your sweet smile." She reached up to caress his cheek and he remained perfectly still.

"Gale might not be appreciative of what you've done but his family will be. And I am too." He swallowed and reached up to cover her hand with his. He kept it there for a moment before he removed her hand and sighed.

"We should go," he said softly. "Ryen will be off work soon and we shouldn't be out after curfew. Thread is going to crack down on that one for sure." Katniss nodded and picked up the basket. Peeta didn't offer her his arm though he did offer to carry the basket through town but Katniss held onto it tightly as they approached the Seam.

People she had known all her life gave them disapproving glares as they walked. Gale lived on the far side of the Seam, closer to the woods. She wasn't sure if he would be home from the mines yet but she could at least speak to Hazelle. She knew both Rory and Vick looked up to their brother but she wouldn't have thought either of them would write such hateful words about her. Since Rory was the same age as Prim, she figure he'd been the one to commit the act but she supposed Vick could have been responsible too. It didn't matter anymore. She would make sure they knew what Peeta had sacrificed for their family.

An older woman who sat on her porch, clucked her tongue and shook her head. Peeta paused, his eyes narrowing at the woman. Katniss wrapped her fingers around his and he glanced down. She looked back at the woman, who leaned back in her chair and muttered something under her breath. Katniss lifted her chin and tugged on Peeta's hand.

She didn't let go, not even when they stopped in front of an old run down shack. She stepped in front of him and knocked sharply on the door. It opened and Posy's wide eyes stared up at her.

"Katniss? What are you doing here?"

"I came to speak to your mama, is she here?"

"Posy, who's at the door?" Vick joined her and his eyes narrowed. "What do you want?"

"Vick that's not nice," Posy scolded. Vick's eyes flicked to Katniss's and Peeta's joined hands and sneered.

"Gale isn't here."

"We would like to speak to your mom."

"Why? So you can insult her and call her some more names?"

"I apologize for the way my soldier treated your family," Peeta said softly. "He was completely out of line."

"What do you care," the younger boy spat.

"Vick," Katniss said sharply. "We don't have time for this. Where is your mother?"

"Ma, a peacekeeper and a townie want to talk to you," he called, his hand on the door.

"What are you on about, boy?" Hazelle appeared at the door, wiping her hands on a towel. "Katniss. Liuetenant Mellark. What can I do for you folks today?"

"Hazelle, could we come in?"

"Course," she held the door open, swatting at Vick. "Posy move that laundry off the table so Katniss and the Lieutenant can sit down."

"Please, ma'am, call me Peeta." Vick rolled his eyes behind his mother.

"Katniss, what's in the basket," Posy moved closer.

"Peeta and I brought you all some food. There are a couple of loaves of bread, some flour, sugar, and a couple of vegetables for you to make some soup." Posy's face lit up as she grabbed the first thing she could reach, which was a loaf of honey wheat bread.

"You made this, Mister Peeta," she asked, her mouth bulging.

"Honey don't be rude," Hazelle scolded but Peeta laughed.

"Yes, I baked it especially for you, Miss Posy."

"I never had real baked bread," she tore off another piece and stuffed it in her mouth. Peeta swallowed as he watched the little girl eat.

"So what brings yall here?" Katniss opened her mouth to explain when the back door opened and then slammed. Katniss frowned; they never used that back door, unless Gale was sneaking home from the Slag Heap, Posy had told Katniss one time.

"Ma, you gotta see what Gale and I shot today!" Rory's broad grin slid off his face as soon as he saw Katniss and Peeta sitting at the table.

"Rory? Where did you go? Gimme a hand with this bird!"

"Gale...you might want to come in here," Rory said slowly. Gale stomped into the room and froze.

"What's going on here?"

"What's going on is that you're going to be shot," Peeta jumped to his feet. Posy gasped and Katniss shot Peeta a disapproving look.

"Peeta please."

"I warned you that we are getting a new Head Peacekeeper. I told you he wouldn't hesitate to shoot you if he finds you. And now you're taking your brother in there with you?"

"Hate to break it to you, Merchant, but not all of us have cushy jobs to keep food on the table. I do what I have to do to survive," Gale glowered as he stood face to face with Peeta.

"Boys, stop it," Hazelle said, wringing her hands. "Oh Katniss, help me."

"Peeta, please sit back down. Posy, why don't you take some more of this bread and go outside with your brothers."

"Don't think you can order her around like she's your sister," Gale snapped, his eyes never leaving Peeta's. "Why don't both of you take this food and go?"

"We're not going anywhere," Katniss said angrily. "You're going to sit down and listen to us. Peeta saved your life today. He sacrificed a lot so the least you can do is sit down and listen to him."

"You're not welcome here anymore, Katniss," Vick said bitterly. "Not since you married a peacekeeper."

"Be quiet, Vick," Gale snapped at his brother. "You're in enough trouble as it is."

"Well I suppose we know who the real vandal is," Peeta crossed his arms, his eyes darting to Vick. Hazelle gasped and rushed forward, holding her arms out.

"Please Lieutenant, he didn't know what he was doing. Don't punish my boy-"

"He's a Peacekeeper, Ma," Gale's eyes glittered. "He doesn't show mercy or pay mind to mothers' cries."

"Gale, I've told you before, I'll tell you again: you don't know a thing about me," Peeta said, his voice deadly calm. His face softened as he turned to Hazelle.

"Mrs. Hawthorne, I asked Katniss to bring me here so I can assure you, I mean no harm to your family. I made sure that the charges against your son were dropped and the case was closed. But I also wanted to warn you. All of you," his eyes traveled the room. "This new Head is bad news. He's cruel and bloodthirsty and he will be looking for people to make examples of. You must be cautious and keep your heads low. The fence on the border has been turned on and will be charged at all hours of the day. Thread will position soldiers around the border to make sure no one escapes. Look, we brought you some food to last you-"

"We don't want your Capitol food," Gale said angrily. "We don't need your charity. And if Katniss was any kind of decent Seam girl, she would have explained that to you."

"She did. But I find it ridiculous to be so prideful when your little sister's cheeks are sunken in like that." Gale's jaw seemed to twitch and Katniss swore he was about to punch Peeta.

"Gale," Posy's voice was meek and Gale's eyes softened. "He brought us bread. And other stuff. Please, won't you be nice to him?" Hazelle wrapped her arms around her daughter and kissed her hair.

"You all mean the world to Katniss. And Katniss means the world to me. Which is why I will do what I can to keep you safe. It's why I forged Cray's signature on the pardons and lied to my Commander." Even Gale looked stunned.

"You did what," Rory said, his jaw dropping.

"Look, you don't have to like me. But I'm asking you to trust me. Just let me help you, at least while Thread is in town and until the danger is passed."

"Are you saying you don't think he will stay," Rory asked, his brow furrowed.

"I really can't say. My Commander in District 2 was surprised that Thread was sent here. I honestly don't think he will stay long. But there's no telling what kind of damage he will do while he is here. We all just have to be careful. Katniss explained to me about debts in the Seam. Just know that I don't expect anything in return. I may be a peacekeeper but this is still my home. You're all still my neighbors. No time in 2, no amount of beatings, no matter how many times I have been called trash and dirt, will ever change that." Katniss moved closer to him and slipped her hand into his. Gale's eyes flickered to their joined hands back to Peeta's earnest face. His arms uncrossed and he sighed before he slipped silently from the room. They heard the back door slam again and Hazelle closed her eyes.

"Just don't come around and flaunt your marriage in front of him," Vick said quietly before he followed his brother from the room.

"For what it's worth," Rory said hesitantly, "thank you." Peeta nodded and Hazelle stroked Posy's hair.

"We're grateful, Peeta. We might not seem it but we are grateful."

"I guess we should be going. Katniss can bring you some more food next week."

"You can come too, Mister Peeta," Posy said, hugging him around the middle. Peeta's wide eyes found Katniss's and she smiled.

"Take care, Miss Posy." He cupped her chin for a moment before he nodded to Hazelle and Rory, and exited the house.

"Katniss," Rory followed them outside. "Vick didn't mean it. What he wrote, I mean. He was just mad that you married someone else, after turning Gale down. He felt bad about it afterwards but when he asked Gale and I to help him to clean it off, the peacekeepers had already seen it."

"To be honest I kind of thought you were the one who did it," Katniss said with a slight smile.

"Me? Prim would flay me alive. And her opinion means way too much to me."

"Oh I know, Rory," Katniss smirked. Peeta's brow raised at the exchange; was Gale's youger brother sweet on Primrose Everdeen? It certainly sounded that way.

"Anyway, thank you again, Peeta. You're alright. If my brother wasn't nursing a broken heart and wounded pride, he would thank you too."

"I highly doubt that," Katniss snorted.

"Just tell him to be careful, Rory. I don't know how you two got into the woods this time-"

"Oh, we didn't go all the way into the woods. A turkey crossed into the meadow and we shot him from the fence. Gale heard the fence on and warned me, else I would have fried. It will last us awhile but I'll make sure they don't throw your food out out of spite."

"Posy needs some vegetables," Peeta said softly. "And I'll bring more when I can."

"We appreciate it. Katniss, uh, I was hoping….well I was hoping I could ask Prim over this week. To help me with my homework, I mean."

"School has been out for weeks now, Rory," she quirked a brow. Rory turned red.

"I need to get a head start, I mean, she's the smartest in our class…" Katniss coughed, attempting to cover her laughter.

"I'll tell her to expect you."

"Thanks. Oh Peeta. What did you do about the fine...umm, that Vi-Gale owes?" Peeta looked bemused and Rory cleared his throat.

"You said the charges had been dropped but Gale told us that he still had to pay a fine. What-"

"I paid it," Peeta said quickly. Rory's eyes widened and Katniss squeezed her husband's hand.

"Tell him that he was sentenced to a flogging in the square, Rory. Make sure he understands how close…Cray said Gale would be whipped and when Cray was killed, Peeta forged the signature. He really did save him. Make sure Gale knows that." Rory nodded, dazed, and Peeta lead her down the path and out of the Seam.

"You were awful to him," he said, giving her a kiss on the temple. "About his crush. I thought he was going to pass out, he was blushing so hard."

"Rory has had a thing for Prim for ages. It's cute but they're still really young."

"Does she reciprocate?"

"If you mean does she like him back, then yes she does. She tries to hide it though. She knows how I feel about it."

"I know younger than that who have gotten married," he said playfully.

"He has to be able to support her and he can't do that right now. I like him but he has some growing up to do."

"Spoken like a true big sister."

"I've dedicated my life to Prim," she shrugged. "I would do anything for her."

"No one knows that better than I do." She stopped, holding his hands.

"Did you really pay Gale's fine?"

"Not yet but I intend to. Just in case Thread asks where the money is."

"Peeta-"

"I know they can't afford it. It's nothing, really." She shook her head and took his face in her hands, pulling him down for a kiss. His eyes shot open but eventually fluttered shut as he was lost in her sudden wave of passion. His arm slipped around her waist and his hand caressed her cheek as he kissed her back. As suddenly as it had come, they broke apart, breathless. Peeta's mind raced as she stared up at him. Did it bother him that every time she kissed him like that, it was because he had done something for her loved ones? Did he have reason to complain or should he just shut up and enjoy her affections?

That nagging voice in his head laughed cruelly. It's all about a debt to her it said, making him wince. She won't ever really love you. She's just thanking you, the way she knows how. Why should she love you? You're a Capitol lapdog now and she's been hurt by your lot too many times.

She knows I love her, he thought stubbornly. She knows I would do anything for her. How I will put her before my duty.

You're too different. You can never really be together.

"Peeta? You ok?"

"Yeah," he said, shaking his head. "Sorry. Lost in thought. Let's head on over to the bakery. Rye and Madge will meet us there." She nodded and didn't release his hand as they walked through the district.

"Has Gale always…" he trailed off and she looked up at him, her brow furrowed.

"Has he always what?"

"Has he always been in love with you?" She made a face and shook her head; he watched her anxiously, wondering if she would answer him.

"Gale and I have always had...a complicated relationship. We didn't talk much while we hunted together and that was really the only time we would see each other. We would sometimes have the other over for dinner but that was rare. There wasn't enough food to go around, for one. But he was always taking girls to the slag heap and I was never thinking of any kind of relationship at all. When he asked me to marry him, I basically asked him if he had any other reason for doing it besides that we make a good team. He couldn't give me one. He never said he loved me. And really, I think it's more his wounded pride than anything else. I told him I didn't want to marry anyone, and then he hears that I married a peacekeeper from the Merchant class. He may be sad about losing his hunting partner but I think he just liked the idea of us. He certainly never asked me anything of great importance, like my favorite color for example." Peeta's lips curved upward.

"It's green, of course." She paused, turning to stare at him as if she was just now seeing him.

"And what is yours?"

"Orange."

"Orange? Like Effie Trinkett's hair?"

"A bit more muted," he chuckled. "More like...sunset." She cocked her head and their eyes searched each other's.

"Well," he cleared his throat. "I always thought you had something with Gale. I was jealous of him before I even officially met you."

"I wish you had just talked to me when we were younger."

"So do I. But I was a coward."

"Hey," she looked stern. "What did I tell you about calling yourself names?"

"Right. Sorry. I was beyond intimidated by you." She snorted and shook her head.

"Why? I mean, look at me."

"I am," he shot her a sideways smile. "And I can't really stop."

"Creep," she made a face but leaned in to kiss him. He chuckled as he wrapped his arm around her waist and tugged her forward.

* * *

Several peacekeepers were walking around town and nodded to Peeta as they passed. They stopped briefly to talk to Darius, who seemed especially grateful when Peeta asked about Rosalie.

"She told me what you said to Cray," he said in a low voice. "Katniss, this man would take down the Capitol for you, I hope you know." Katniss looked startled but Peeta shook his head.

"I'm just glad Rosie is ok."

"She's fine. She told me Cray was letting her do his house work for some extra money and I wasn't happy about it but babies aren't cheap. But with Commander

Thread in town...well, I asked her to stay home and take care of herself and the baby."

"Understandable. Well, we need to be off. Make sure you are telling people about the curfew, Darius, lest they forget." Darius nodded in understanding.

"Have a good evening, Liuetenant. Mrs. Mellark."

"Bye Darius," Katniss waved him off and he straightened his back and joined a group of peacekeepers a few feet away.

"What was he talking about," she whispered as they hurried away. "What did you say?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It matters to me," she said sharply. "What did you say to Cray?"

"I warned him not to go near my wife again." Her jaw dropped as she spun him around to face her.

"You what?"

"Katniss if I'd had the chance...I would have liked to be there when he was killed. So I could make him pay for what he did to you." She shivered, though she didn't know if that was from his dark words or his hand on her cheek.

"Well now you don't have to worry about him hurting any more girls."

"I don't know if the cost is worth it to me," he said stiffly. "As awful as that sounds and as dark as that makes my heart, but I wish I'd have gotten to him before…" he trailed off, sighing heavily.

Katniss inhaled sharply; she understood his meaning. His scandalous activities had been talked about for years but Katniss had been the last one in his "collection". It was true that he would no longer use any woman in the district but it made Peeta's blood boil to think about the old man taking advantage of Katniss.

Peeta wrapped his arm around her shoulders and kissed her forehead.

"He's gone," he said softly. "He's gone and no one will ever hurt you again. I'll make sure of it." He pulled her off, in the direction of the bakery.

* * *

 _ **I know a lot of Gale shippers argue that Gale really loved her but I really don't believe it. I think he liked the idea of them together, and may have wanted them to be in a relationship but wouldn't call that love. But I tried to make it go both ways. What do you think of the Hawthorne dynamic? I usually see Rory as the hot-headed one since he is the 2nd oldest but I like the idea of him trying to impress a certain someone so he will be more logical than usually seen.**_

 _ **Madge's and Rye's toasting is coming and then a very interesting trip to the Capitol...intrigued? ;)**_

 _ **Sorry it's a short one but it's been a chaotic few weeks so I figured a short chapter was better than none ;) I will post again next week!**_

 _ **XOXOXO**_


	20. Chapter 20

_**This chapter contains a bunch of Everlark smut! just read at your own risk ;)**_

* * *

The baker was the only one behind the counter and there was one customer in the bakery. Peeta waved to his father when they entered and grabbed a chair for Katniss to sit.

"Are you hungry?" She shook her head but her stomach emitted a loud growl. Peeta's brow raised and he let himself behind the counter, patting his father's shoulder as he passed. He grabbed a napkin and plated a couple of pastries and a croissant, which he carried back to his wife.

"Can't lie to me," he said as he placed a quick kiss on her hair.

"Well hello, Lieutenant," his father said cheerfully, once the customer had gone.

"Dad, please. No uniform, no titles."

"No Head Peacekeeper at your side," he said quietly. "Hello again, Katniss, dear." Katniss smiled, her mouth full of buttery croissant.

"I'm sorry about earlier, Dad-"

"Peeta, I know how things are now. Heck I knew how they would be when they came and took you away in the night. It's not your fault." Peeta gave him a sad smile and pressed his palms to the counter.

"Where's Mom?"

"She just finished the books and went upstairs to nap." Peeta sighed.

"I wish you had more help around here, Pop. You're getting too old to do all of this alone."

"What's this old business? I'm fit as a fiddle, Peet." He held up his arms, showing Peeta his muscles and he winked. Peeta chuckled as he sat beside Katniss and

picked at the danish.

"Maybe I can have a grandson come help me in the bakery one day," the baker said with a wink. "Or a granddaughter. That would make your mother happy." Peeta nearly choked on his pastry and his eyes watered.

"Dad please," he gasped. The baker laughed heartily as he cleaned the cases. Peeta shot Katniss an apologetic look but she was studying the croissant intently. He allowed himself, just for a moment, to imagine a little girl sitting beside them, with blonde curls and Katniss's stormy eyes. As quickly as the image had appeared, it vanished and the danish suddenly tasted like cardboard.

"So are Madge and Rye having a tasting, or do they just want to pick something," he twisted around in his seat to address his father.

"I think they just want to pick something small. Madge mentioned earlier that she doesn't really want another cake but she doesn't want to disappoint her mother."

"Her mother is making some rather extravagant requests," Katniss mumbled. Bran nodded delicately.

"Her only daughter is getting married. It's not surprising."

"It's still a District 12 wedding," Peeta shook his head. "I mean, they should know, above all, how poor the district is."

"I'll provide a cake for your brother's wedding, son," Bran said patiently. "I made Bing's, I made yours, and I'll make his."

"One cake is enough, Dad." Bran sighed but didn't say anything else.

"Well they should be here soon enough. You two want to stay for dinner?"

"Thanks Pop but Madge invited us to have dinner with her family. I need to speak to her father anyway so it works out." Questions appeared in Bran's eyes but he said nothing.

"Can I get you anything else, Katniss?"

"Oh no sir, Mr. Mellark but thank you."

"Please Katniss, it's Bran. You're family now, you know." She was grateful he hadn't asked her to call him dad.

"Ok Bran."

"Well I need to finish decorating a wedding cake before it gets too late. Unless you want to finish it for me, Peet?" Peeta's brow quirked.

"Sure Pop, I can finish it for you."

"Attaboy. It's a fairly simple design. Ten buttercream roses and I already did two of them."

"You got it," Peeta was already pulling on an apron and pushing the kitchen door open.

"Hey son, maybe Katniss would like to watch you work." Peeta paused, his hand on the door.

"Oh, um...sure. You're welcome to come back here with me." She glanced sideways at the baker, who was smiling, before she nodded and stood up.

"If you're sure it's ok." Bran held the counter up for her to follow Peeta into the kitchen and her eyes widened at the size of the ovens in the corner. Peeta went straight to the cake on the counter, inspecting it closely.

"Easy enough," he muttered to himself. He pulled a chair up to the counter and studied the supplies his father had left out. Katniss tentatively picked up a chair and brought it close to the counter but not so close that she would be a distraction. She watched him pick up a bag of frosting. His hand was steady, his eyes were determined, and his tongue poked out the corner of his mouth as he worked. She watched with wide eyes as his nimble hands created the most beautiful flowers she had ever seen. He set the flowers around the tiers and did not speak while he worked. She had come closer, her look of wonder finally drawing his concentration away from the cake.

"You look so awe-struck," he chuckled softly.

"I am," she shook her head. "I've never seen…I mean, you are very talented."

"Well thank you. Dad used to let me decorate the cakes. Ours was the first one I have worked on since I was taken to 2."

"Do you miss it?"

"A bit, yeah. It's tedious work sometimes but I still enjoy it. Here." He handed her a small pink flower and her brow furrowed.

"Why are you handing this to me?"

"I made too many," he said dismissively but she knew better. She uncertainly licked at one of the petals and her eyes closed as the sugar assaulted her tongue.

"Good?" He was watching her out of the corner of his eye, his lips curved upward.

"This should have been in my wedding bouquet." Peeta laughed and she found that she loved the sound.

"That sounds like something the Capitol would do. Sugar flower bouquets." He fell silent as he outlined the tiers in colored icing, his hand sure and steady. Katniss

savored her sugar flower for as long as she could. She heard voices on the other side of the door but couldn't look away from Peeta's work. When the door opened, Peeta didn't even look up.

"Baby bro has still got it," someone whistled.

"What did I say about that baby bro stuff," Peeta shook his head.

"He's going to hit you one of these times and I won't do a thing to stop him," Madge tossed her hair and Bran laughed.

"Looks great, Peet. You almost finished?"

"Yep. I just finished the scalloped edges. Want me to set it in the fridge?"

"That'd be great. She's coming to pick it up in the morning."

"So many toastings this weekend," Katniss laughed from her seat.

"Yeah but the Mayor's daughter's toasting is the highlight of the season," Peeta said when he came back.

"Lucky us," Rye said, wrinkling his nose. Bran chuckled and started to turn.

"Well let me get my sketch book and you can tell me what you want for your second cake."

"No fancy designs, Dad," Rye shook his head. "Madge and I both agreed, just a plain white cake with white frosting. Maybe some of Peeta's sugar roses on it. That's all we need."

"Are you sure, son?"

"This wedding is already way more extravagant than I ever wanted," Madge shrugged. "All that matters to me is that I get to marry the boy I've had a crush on forever."

"Thought that was Gale Hawthorne," Rye teased and received an elbow in the ribs for his cheek. "Ouch!"

"Serves you right," Katniss smirked. Ryen rubbed the spot gingerly and huffed.

"You were the one who told me you had a crush on him!"

"Years ago! Don't make me regret marrying you." Ryen smirked but Peeta's mind swam. So he had been right; Madge had had a thing for Gale at one point. From the way that Katniss was smirking, she already knew about it.

"It's not like we are in the Capitol, so I don't know why people are making such a fuss over a wedding," Madge went on to say.

"Well, maybe it's more than the festivities," Katniss said in a soft voice. "Maybe it's that we are all so starved for something good to happen that everyone wants to be part of it." Everyone stared at her and her cheeks reddened. Peeta wanted to sweep her into his arms and kiss her breathless.

"Smart AND pretty," Ryen finally said with a smile and a wink toward Peeta. "You lucked out, Peet."

"Don't I know it," he said softly, slipping his hand into hers and squeezing.

"Would you mind making some blue roses for our cake, Peeta? Just a few."

"I'd be happy to, Madge. If you're sure that's all you want."

"Our other cake is fancy enough," she assured him. "We don't need more than that."

"Well, glad that didn't take long. Shall we head to your house? My stomach is growling."

"You're not going to change first?" Peeta quirked a brow at his brother, who frowned and looked down.

"Oh...yeah, I guess I should."

"We will wait." Ryen nodded and grabbed his bag from the corner of the room.

* * *

They said goodbye to the baker and both men offered their arms to Madge and Katniss. Peeta and Ryen looked straight ahead as they walked through the district but both girls gaped as they passed the square. Huge scaffolds had been erected as well as several other devices they had no idea about.

"Don't look," Peeta said out of the corner of his mouth. Katniss bit her lip but tried to look ahead as the boys were doing. A few peacekeepers called out to Peeta and he ackowledged them with a nod. Katniss gripped his arm tightly, grateful that he wasn't dressed in his uniform but still feeling tension roll off her in waves. Peeta did not release her until they were standing on Madge's front porch and she sighed as she pushed the door open.

"Mama? Daddy, we're here!" The Mayor came to greet them, shaking hands with the men.

"Dinner will be ready shortly. Madge, I've gotten a few questions about the music at your ceremony. I thought you could write down a few songs you would like."

"Oh Daddy, it's fine if they just play. I don't need particular songs. This can be a party, something to make the district people forget their problems for an hour or two."

"Well, alright, if that's what-"

"I do have one request," she cut him off and turned to Katniss. "Would you sing?"

"What?" Katniss's eyes widened.

"Please Katniss. I have heard you have the most beautiful voice in the district."

"Who told you that," she shot a look toward Peeta, who shook his head.

"People talk. They said your dad was the best singer in 12 and that his daughter takes after him. Just one song is all I ask."

"I...um…"

"Think about it," she said gently. "I'd be so grateful though. I have heard you before, you know."

"Wait, what? When?"

"You were walking with Prim and singing to yourself. It was lovely." Katniss looked panic-stricken and bit her lip. Madge's eager smile fell slightly.

"You don't have to, of course. I wouldn't want you to feel embarassed. I just think it would be lovely."

"I'll...I'll think about it." Madge nodded in thanks and Peeta turned to her father.

"Mayor Undersee, I was hoping I could have a word with you before dinner?"

"Of course, Lieutenant Mellark. Let's step into my study." Peeta made to follow the mayor upstairs.

"Rye, you should come too." Ryen nodded and followed the men up the stairs. Madge huffed.

"Let's let the boys talk. Come on, Katniss, we can probably sneak a dessert before dinner is served." She tugged Katniss into the kitchen, dodging the cook.

* * *

Peeta was quiet as they walked back home, his arm trembling slightly as she held on. She wanted to ask him what he and Ryen talked to the mayor about but he seemed anxious to get them home quickly. The sun had set and Peeta's eyes kept darting around. No one had given them any trouble yet but he did not stop to chat to anyone and Katniss struggled to keep up with his brisk pace.

When they were inside their house, he leaned against the door and sighed deeply.

"Did you think we would have some trouble?"

"I didn't know what we would face. We will have to be careful about this curfew. We can't give Thread any reasons to retalliate. I'm going to call Rye to make sure he made it home ok." Katniss wandered into the bedroom while she listened to him talking to his brother. It had been a day of emotions and she felt tired and alert

at the same time. She heard Peeta enter the bedroom, sighing with relief.

"He's ok?"

"He's fine. I was afraid he wouldn't take the rules seriously but he seems to understand Thread being here isn't the best news. I mean he should understand, after everything…" he glanced up at her and cleared his throat, seemingly aware of what he was saying.

"Anyway. Do you want to get ready for bed?"

"I was actually thinking of taking a shower, if that's alright." He nodded and pulled his shirt off.

"Go right ahead. I think I'll take one too. Um, after you, I mean." She chewed on her lip and turned toward the shower for a moment, before turning back to him. He watched her with a bemused expression.

"You could join me," she finally said. His eyes widened and his lips parted in surprise.

"Are you...are you sure?" She looked back at the bathroom and nodded.

"Yes. Yes." He nodded and took her outstretched hand. She leaned over and turned the water on, jumping back when the stream cascaded down. His touch was gentle, almost hesitant, as he pulled her shirt over her head. He wrapped his arms around her waist and leaned in to kiss her neck.

"You're sure, Katniss," he questioned softly. She nodded, though she didn't turn to face him. She felt her face heat up as his hand slid under her bra and she held her arms up so he could pull it off. He didn't try to turn her around; his hands slid across her back and his lips left soft kisses on her shoulder as he moved his hands down to the button of her pants. She tilted her head back and his lips moved down the smooth skin of her neck. He walked around in front of he knelt before her, like he was ready to wordship her. His eyes never left hers as he pulled her pants down her legs and her teeth dug into her lip as she watched him, her hands gripping his shoulders. He hooked his fingers in the side of her panties and with another questioning glance, they joined the rest of her clothes on the floor. The hot water was starting to make the room unbearably muggy and he stood in front of her, his hands curving around her hips.

"So beautiful," he whispered and she wondered if he had meant to say it aloud. She pushed his undershirt over his head then removed the rest of his clothing as tenderly as he had done for her. When they were both naked, he pulled her hand to his lips. She moved the cloth aside and pulled him backward, wrapping her arms around his strong frame once they were both inside. She shivered as the hot water beat down on her back, although it was probably more from the way his tongue prodded hers. His hands moved up to cup her breasts, his fingers tweaking her nipples. He was gentle at first, but his caresses became more eager. Her nails scratched his back and shoulders as she met his passionate kisses. He broke their kiss and she was confused for a moment until she saw his sly smile. He dropped to his knees, his hands running up and down her thighs.

"Peeta-" he looked up at her as her voice shook and he rested his chin on her belly.

"Will you allow it?" She smiled weakly, feeling her arousal growing at the dark intensity that was swirling in his bright eyes.

"I'll allow it." He kissed his way down her belly, his tongue swiping up her slit as he draped one of her legs over his shoulder. She cried out, one hand pressed against the wall and the other frantically holding onto him. Her nails dug into his flesh but he didn't let up; his eyes remained locked on hers as his talented tongue brought her to a screeching halt. She leaned against the wall, whimpering when she became too sensitive. He sat on his knees for a moment, wrapping his arms around her legs and resting his cheek against her stomach. She reached down to finger his curls and he closed his eyes; his long lashes tickled her skin and she smiled.

"Can I do anything for you?"

"No. I wanted to do that for you. You don't need to do anything." She pouted, still hating that he gave so much and asked for so little in return.

"Can I wash your hair?" He glanced up at her and nodded. She reached for his shampoo and lathered it in her hands, moving aside a little so the water could reach him. He closed his eyes as she stood over him, her nails scraping his scalp in a delicious way. He sat still, despite the growing discomfort in his knee, and let her tend to him.

"Go ahead and stand up." He rose to his feet and kissed her as she pushed him under the water. He shook his head as the soap streamed down his face and she moved aside so he could splash the water in his eyes. She leaned into his back, leaving gentle kisses over his spine. He shivered as her hand reached around and rested on his pelvis. His breathing grew heavier as she stroked him slowly, the water making him sleek and smooth. His hand came up to rest on hers, stopping her and he turned to kiss her.

"I don't want this to be over with already." She didn't altogether understand but he pulled her hand to his lips and released it. She reached past him for the shampoo bottle and he cupped her chin.

"Can I?" She smiled as she handed it over and he poured a generous amount into his hand.

"You'll have to unbraid it first." She fingered the end of her braid for a moment before she quickly unbraided it and let it fall down her back. Peeta moved his hands through her hair and she nearly released a moan at how good it felt.

"Ok, let's rinse it out." She leaned her head back and let him scrub the suds out, her wet hair slapping her back. She turned to face the water and lifted her face, relishing how the heat felt on her skin. Peeta stood behind her, his chest pressed to her back and his arms wrapped around her. He shuffled around, attempting to lean his lower half away from her but she reached behind to knead his ass. He moaned, thrusting his hips forward and she felt his erection prodding her. She reached behind her, gripping him tightly and he leaned forward to shut the water off.

"Let me get you a towel." He returned quickly, wrapping her in the rough cloth and he kissed her forehead. She watched him while he grabbed another towel and unashamedly stood in the middle of the bathroom, toweling his hair. Her eyes were drawn to that thing of curiosity that rested between his legs, which was pointing almost straight up. He noticed her staring and hurriedly wrapped the towel around his waist. It almost looked painful; was that why he was hiding it? She wrapped the towel around her frame and padded into the bedroom to find some clean clothes. Peeta followed and she glanced behind her; she couldn't stop looking down

at the bulge underneath the towel. Her father had always told her curiosity would kill the kitten but she couldn't help herself.

"Peeta?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I...kiss you?" His brow quirked and he stroked her cheek with his knuckles.

"You know you don't have to ask, Katniss. I told you that I'm yours." She leaned up to kiss him and he cupped her face with both hands. She pulled the towel away from his waist and he gasped against her lips. She wasted no time in dropping to her knees in front of him and his eyes widened. She looked directly into his eyes as she licked a trail from the base to the tip and she leaned back to see how he would react. When he didn't stop her, she opened her mouth wide and hollowed out her cheeks, remembering to cover her teeth so she wouldn't hurt him.

"Oh my god, Katniss," he said through gritted teeth, throwing his head back. Her knees were getting sore but she wanted to do this for him. She actually loved the flush in his cheeks, the wild look in his eyes, and the way his teeth dug into his bottom lip. She couldn't say that she loved the act itself but it was worth it, to see Peeta this way.

"C'mere. More comfortable." He tugged her toward the bed and fell backwards, pulling her down with him. Her towel came open and he flung it to the floor. She had to admit the soft bed was better for her knees and she hummed her appreciation as she took him into her mouth again.

"Oh! Fffffuck!" His hips jerked upwards and she wrapped her hand around him, twisting in the motion he had showed her. She glanced up to see if he was still watching her but his head was thrown back onto the pillow, his hands clenched the sheets with white knuckles, and droplets of sweat dripped down his throat.

Katniss doubled her efforts, experimenting with her tongue and lips to see what made him writhe the most. She had always been an eager learner; whenever her father showed her something, she was determined to perfect it. When Gale started to show her traps and snares, she paid close attention so that she could do it without any help.

She remembered what he had told her last time and put his teachings to good use.

"Katniss- I can't...I'm going to...oh damn." He reached for her, and she jumped as his hand landed on her ass. His fingers slid through her folds and he pushed one inside. She tried to concentrate on her pace but her head was getting foggy as his thumb made frantic circles. He seemed determined to make her finish first, as he pushed a second finger inside her. She moved her hand down to cup his sac and that was his undoing.

"Katniss!" She nearly gagged as he exploded but this was what she wanted, she told herself. She didn't want him to pull away again. She wanted to taste him completely. It wasn't pleasant, she admitted, but his heaving chest and his blissful expression made her proud of herself. He collapsed backwards, his arm thrown over his face, his other hand gripping his own hair.

"I'm dreaming," he grunted. "This has got to be a dream."

"How many dreams like this have you had?" He peeked at her from underneath his arm and looked sheepish.

"An embarassing amount, actually." She went pink but he leaned up to kiss her, holding her face in his hands.

"Now lie down and let me take care of you."

"You've already made me...you know."

"Oh Katniss. We have all night. I don't have to go into work until tomorrow afternoon." He smirked as his hand slid down between her legs. They snapped closed around his hand and she swallowed.

"Can you...I mean, will you be able to...uh, finish, again?"

"It will take me a little while to recover but I can make you cum again."

"Cum?"

"Um, yeah. That's what Ryen and Bing call it. Another word for orgasm. What we've both done tonight."

"I don't know anything about... all of this," she huffed. He grinned as he cupped her chin.

"I like that you're innocent. And for the record, I really don't know that much about it either. Only what my brothers have taught me."

"But you've done things," she protested. "More than I have, anyway."

"We can learn together," he said patiently. "And we will only do what you are comfortable with. The moment you tell me to stop, I will." He had told her this many times before and she knew he meant it.

"There's more we can do? Without going all the way, I mean?" He nodded as he leaned in to kiss her neck.

"Plenty. And apparently women can have multiple orgasms, so I look forward to learning all the different ways I can make you cum." Her breathing hitched as he took her breast into his mouth, kneading it in a way only a baker could.

"Are you upset that we haven't...gone all the way yet?" He froze and leaned back to study her.

"No, Katniss, of course not. I told you only what you are comfortable with and I meant it. I told you before, sex shouldn't be taken lightly. I'm ecstatic enough to kiss you. The rest, well...I just count my lucky stars every night."

"But you want... sex."

"I'm not going to lie and say I don't fantasize of being with you in that way," he said gently. "But you can't even say the word without shaking. You're not ready and that's ok. Being with you is a miracle, however you'll let me. We will figure it out as we go." She was overcome with the fear of rejection, that he didn't actually want that with her but another voice in her head told her she was being stupid. He's just being a good man. He won't push you and you should be happy with that.

"I'm getting a little hungry. What do you say I whip up something for us to eat?"

"Ok. As long as…" she trailed off and his brow raised.

"As long as what?"

"As long as we can come back to this later." Both of his eyebrows shot high into his hair and his lips curved upward.

"Well then both of us need to keep up our strength."

* * *

All it really took was Katniss moaning his name and tugging at his pajama pants to make him harden again. Once they were back in the bedroom, his lips latched onto her throat as he pushed her shirt off and threw it aside.

"Katniss. Do you mind if I try something?" She glanced down and saw him watching her intently. He gave her a shy smile before leaning forward to wrap his tongue around her nipple.

"Ah! O- Ok," she stammered.

"Do you trust me?"

"You know I do. Oh!" He grinned as he moved his tongue under her breast, to the valley of her chest, before continuing his sweet torture on the other side.

"Tell me immediately if something is uncomfortable for you. I need you to trust me. This...this isn't what it looks like." She frowned and tried to sit up.

"What do you mean?"

"You asked me if there was more we could do. There's something I have been wanting to try but only if you're ok with it."

"How do I know I'm ok with it if I don't know what it is?" He resisted the urge to roll his eyes. Logic didn't belong in the bedroom. Especially when they were both behaving worse than horny teenagers.

"Just tell me if you want me to stop."

"But-" he kissed her and her protests flew out of her head. She'd never kissed anyone before Peeta, it was true (she refused to think about her actual first kiss...she would not let herself think about it) but she couldn't imagine it would feel this incredible with anyone else. He was never forceful but still passionate and left her wanting more. He spread her legs and wrapped them around his waist, so her heels were pressing into his lower back. She jumped as he moved closer, his cock pressing insistently against her center. He wrapped his hand around his shaft and stroked a few times, tapping his head gently against her folds. She sucked in a breath as he thrust forward, sliding along her slit. He watched her closely as he held himself in his hand, thrusting his hips so he was sliding back and forth.

"Ohhh," she breathed out, shuddering at how good it felt.

"You feel amazing," he moaned. "You are so incredible, Katniss. How does this feel?"

"It feels...it's really good." He pushed a finger inside her and curved, making her dig her nails into his thigh.

"Peeta!"

"Stay with me, Katniss," he grunted. He spread her wet folds and his eyes fluttered as he grinded against her clit. If this was already so amazing...what would it be like when he was finally inside her?

Don't go there, Peeta, he told himself firmly. He lost his rhythm for a moment and bit his lip.

"Do you want to be on top?" She leaned up on her elbows and her brow furrowed.

"I don't really know-"

"I'll help you," he held out his hand and switched places so he was lying on his back. She straddled his legs and his hands rested on her hips.

"Move up just a little," he pulled her forward and they both gasped when their centers were aligned again.

"Just...move until it feels good." She moved her hips, sliding back and forth just as he had done. His fingers squeezed her hips and as she became more confident in her movements, she pressed her palms to his chest. He moved his hands up to her breasts, his eyes locked on hers. She faltered for a moment before she increased her pace, throwing her head back completely. Peeta groaned and leaned up to wrap his arms around her, trailing his tongue down her throat.

"Peeta! I'm...I think…"

"Me too," he growled. "Katniss, I want us to cum together. Are you close?"

"I...I think so!" Peeta moved his thumb from her breast to her clit and her hand flew backwards to grip his leg. He had never seen something as beautiful as an impassioned Katniss. He was covered in her desire and he absolutely loved it. She nearly collapsed backwards but he held her in his arms as they rode out their climaxes together. He hid his face in her chest and her hand rested on his head.

"Wow," she said weakly.

"When I can move again, I'll bring you a towel to clean up with."

"Hmmm, it's ok." He pulled her down to the bed and she snuggled up beneath his chin.

"I sort of like experimenting with you." He laughed softly, his hand stroking her back.

"I like experimenting with you too. I never thought, in a million years, I would be lying here with you like this."

"I wish you had talked to me in school," she said tiredly. "I mean, I wish you had said something when we were younger...before you disappeared."

"I do too. But as we have already established, you were intimidating. And I was a fool. There's nothing we can do about it now."

"So are you going to tell me what you had to talk to Madge's father about?" His lips on her forehead made her even more sleepy.

"We can talk in the morning. You get some rest."

"Mm. Ok. Good night, Peeta."

"Sleep well, my love." She fell asleep before he got it out and snored softly in his arms. He wished he could join her in her dreams but he had work to do. He carefully disentangled himself from her arms and pulled on a pair of shorts, before crossing over to the corner and finding a box full of papers and documents. He glanced at Katniss to make sure he hadn't woken her before digging into the box. Finding the folder he needed, he held it to his chest and tiptoed to the kitchen.

He set the folder on the table and opened it up. A serious expression covered his face as he rifled through the papers imapatiently, finally finding what he was looking for. His eyes darted across the page until he jumped to his feet and ran to the phone in the corner. He glanced at the number on his hand before dialing.

"Hello?"

"This is Peeta Mellark."

"Ah. Glad you finally called, kid. We have some work to do."


	21. Chapter 21

When Katniss awoke, the sun was streaming through the window. She heard the bathroom door open and turned to glance over her shoulder. Peeta entered the room with a towel around his waist, his blonde curls dripping. The sun caught the droplets in his hair and cast rainbows all around the room. He was quiet as he made his way to the closet and she sat up and threw the blanket off. He froze, looking like he had just been caught.

"Well good morning."

"Morning. You didn't wait for me to take a shower?" He looked surprised but grinned.

"I wasn't sure how long you would sleep. But I can make breakfast while you take one."

"Ok." She was stunned at how quickly she'd adapted to intimacy with him. She loved the shower they had shared last night and was looking forward to joining him for another one again soon.

"Did you sleep well?"

"I did. You?"

"Like a log. Out all night." He bent down to kiss her as he pulled his shirt on. "Dad called me from the bakery this morning and asked for me to help him with Rye's toasting cake. I'm going to head over there soon if you would like to join me."

"Ok, sure. Let me just shower quickly and get ready."

"Take your time. Would you like pancakes or crepes for breakfast?"

"What's a crepe?"

"Oh well that just answered my question. If you have never had a crepe, you're in for a treat."

"Seems like I'm in for a lifetime of treats," she said with a smile. He swallowed deeply but quickly returned the smile. A lifetime. She had said a lifetime'; it was everything Peeta wanted and yet, he was sure she would leave when the contract ended in 5 years.

Still, he had moments when he felt they were a real married couple. Her eagerness to take a shower with him, to experiment with intimacy, to be near him, it all told him that she was enjoying the married life and maybe, just maybe, she could learn to love him in time. It had only been a week since their toasting but Peeta felt like they had been married for years. And she had asked him for some time, which of course he would give.

"I'll get started on breakfast. Enjoy your shower."

"I would enjoy it a lot more if I weren't alone." His brows shot up and he released a little choked gasp of surprise. She gave him a sly smile as she quickly undressed and closed the bathroom door behind her. Peeta looked down at the rising bulge in his pants and he frowned.

"Don't you dare." But as soon as the water started all he could think of was his naked wife pressed against the wall as he pleasured her on his knees.

"Damn it," he muttered, shaking his head and hurrying into the kitchen. She wanted time and yet here she was, acting like a seductive little vixen. It didn't make him want to slow down. No, in fact he wished he could make love to her right there in the shower.

"Would you stop it," he chastised himself. "She's not ready. She might not even want that with you! Mom would beat us for these lustful thoughts." His pep-talk didn't help at all. He was still hard for her, no matter how much he tried to cast the thoughts away. He tried to focus on the baking, on the intricacy of the crepes but he just kept coming back to how her breasts bounced as she rode him last night, how her tiny whimpers and moans filled the room, the way her lips wrapped around his cock. Slamming the rolling pin down, he stomped into the bedroom and wondered if it was too late to join her in the shower. But his outstretched hand froze on the door knob and his eyes locked on the closed door.

She was singing. It was soft and mesmerizing and Peeta closed his eyes, wanting to savor every precious note. Her sweet melody drifted under the door and straight to his heart. He had no idea what the song was about but all that mattered is that she didn't stop.

It made his want for her so much worse. Groaning, he leaned against the wall and unbuttoned his slacks. He sighed with relief when his erection was released and he licked his palm before wrapping his hand around his shaft. She kept singing for him, his strokes soft and gentle, as hers had been. But it was too much and he couldn't take the teasing right now. He gripped himself harder and leaned his head back against the wall.

 _You are my flower_

 _That's blooming in the mountain so high_

 _You are my flower_

 _That's blooming there for me_

His eyes were squeezed shut as his strokes became more insistent. He reached down to play with his sac, remembering her curious explorations and gentle touches.

 _When summertime is gone and snow begins to fall_

 _You can sing this song and say to one and all_

 _You are my flower_

 _That's blooming in the mountain so high_

"Katniss! Gah," he grunted as his hand became slicker with his release. He panted, leaning his head back and closing his eyes. He pulled his hand away and held it in front of his face. His eyes went from hazy to hardened and he frowned.

"You're disgusting," he said aloud. "Lusting over her like this. You're no worse than Cray." He wiped his hands in disgust, buttoned up his pants, and went to the kitchen to finish breakfast.

* * *

He said nothing about her song when she entered the kitchen and he gave her a small smile as he handed her a plate.

"Crepes are beautiful," she said in awe. He chuckled as he turned back to the stove.

"I put strawberries on them because that's what you liked on the pancakes. I hope it's alright."

"Peeta, I used to eat mint leaves when I was hungry. Anything you make for me is going to taste amazing." His eyes widened and his lips thinned. He'd known she had been hungry but hearing her say it was something else altogether.

"This is so good," she closed her eyes as she shoveled several more bites into her mouth.

"Slow down or you'll get a stomach ache," he said softly. She laughed and her eyes locked on his as he reached over the table and used his thumb to wipe away a bit of strawberry from her lip. She swallowed and his hand fell to his lap.

"So what kind of cake are you making for Ryen and Madge?"

"They're requested a strawberry chiffon cake."

"Sounds fancy."

"It's not too difficult, just time consuming. Dad started it already but he asked me to do the piping and decorations. I think his hands just aren't too steady anymore and it's easier to let someone else do it."

"Do you think you would like to work there more often?" He chewed slowly, his eyes on the table.

"I would but I don't really have the time. Peacekeeper duties are a full time thing and Dad needs someone there all the time. I wish he would hire someone but...well, baking and decorating cakes isn't really something a lot of people in 12 know."

"I guess not. Your family's bakery is the only one that I know of."

"In the Capitol there can be five bakeries on one street. It's insane."

"I'm intrigued to see it but I'm really nervous. What if I say something wrong? Or they just don't like the way I look?"

"I'll be right by your side, Katniss. You don't need to worry." They finished their breakfast and set the plates in the sink. Peeta offered his arm as usual and they set off for the bakery.

* * *

Both of his parents were behind the counter when they entered the bakery. There were several customers studying the display case and Bran sent them a little wave before turning his attention back to his customer.

"Margaret, is that your new daughter-in-law?" Katniss stiffened as the woman in the corner sniffed and turned to Mrs. Mellark.

"Yes," the baker's wife said in a low voice. "That's Katniss Everdeen."

"Mellark, mother. Her name is Mellark now," Peeta said warningly. "I hope you're well, Mrs. Lorney."

"Peeta, you remember Carlita Lorney, don't you," Mrs. Mellark said sweetly. "You escorted her to a dance when you were thirteen."

"I do remember, Carlita. I hope she's well?"

"She's doing wonderfully, Peeta, thank you for asking. She just became an apprentice to the Seamstress. She will be making dresses in the Capitol before you know it!"

"That's wonderful. Tell her I send her my congratulations. Katniss, love, can I get you anything to eat?" Katniss noticed Mrs. Mellark and Mrs. Lorney glaring at her and she shook her head.

"No thank you, Peeta. I'm still full from the delicious breakfast you made for me."

"What did he make for you," Bran asked jovially as he finished with his customer and joined them.

"Crepes. They were so good."

"Course they were! That's his great-great grandfather's recipe. Glad to see you're still using it, son."

"Of course, Dad. And Katniss has already agreed to sample anything I bake."

"He twisted my arm," she said with a heavy sigh and both Mellark men laughed identical, loud laughs.

"I can't believe your son married a… a girl from the Seam," Mrs. Lorney said, loud enough for everyone to hear. Katniss's cheeks went pink and Margaret's lips tightened. Peeta wrapped his arm around Katniss and pulled her into his side.

"I know, Mrs. Lorney, I couldn't really believe my luck either. But I must have done something right because this amazing woman did marry me!" Bran's lips curved upwards while Mrs. Lorney lost all color in her face. She slammed her money down on the counter, grabbed the bag of pastries, and hurried out of the store. Peeta chuckled as he kissed Katniss's temple before he lifted the bar and slid behind the counter.

"Peeta, you can't patronize the customers," Margaret said angrily.

"I'll patronize anyone who thinks they will insult my wife. You hear that, Mother? Katniss is my wife and you'd do well to start accepting that." Margaret looked sour and gave her son and daughter-in-law a deadly glare.

"Come on back into the kitchen with me, Katniss," Peeta gestured for her to follow him and Bran lifted the counter again. Katniss hesitated but Bran nodded, so she followed him to the back. Peeta went straight to the cake on the table and pulled a chair over.

"Here, have a seat. You sure you don't want anything while you wait?"

"I'm fine, really." Truthfully she was craving another one of those sugar flowers he had created, or anything sweet really; what was he doing to her? She had never tasted a sweet concoction in her life and now she couldn't get enough. But she didn't want his mother to say anything nasty and she undoubtedly would if she saw Peeta giving any of their baked goods to her. She leaned on her elbows and watched him turn the cake as he decorated the edges. She loved watching him decorate, she decided. He looked like an entirely different person. She liked him better with a piping bag in his hand rather than a gun. It suited him better. He already had icing smeared on his cheek and he mumbled to himself as he turned the cake this way and that. She couldn't help but smile at the sight of him being a real baker. How different would life be, if he were allowed to be a baker instead of a peacekeeper? She pictured a humble little home, and her bringing home the meat she hunted that day for their dinner. He would bring home bread and cheesebuns after a long day in the bakery, and they would enjoy dinner by candlelight because the electricity would go out after the sun set. He would sneak a sweet treat to their little girl…

She gasped, clapping her hand to her mouth. It wasn't the first time she had imagined having a child with him but she was no less embarrassed. His brow furrowed in concern.

"Are you alright?"

"Fine. Sorry, I, uh...I bit my tongue." He nodded and went back to his work but glanced over at her more than once.

Her mother's words echoed in her head, reminding her that having a child with Peeta would mean she wouldn't have to worry about a Reaping. But what would happen if something happened to him? Would she still be able to keep her child safe? Would she disappear completely as her mother did when she lost her father, and leave their child to fend for themself?

"Katniss?"

"Huh?" She shook her head, noticing him watching her. "I'm sorry. Did you say something?"

"You sure you're alright?"

"Lost in thought, I think. Wow. You're finished already?"

"Nearly. We've been sitting here for over an hour. Did you want to go to Madge's while I go to work?"

"I think Prim would like to. She and Madge have gotten close over this wedding business."

"Prim needs more fun things to do," Peeta said with a smile. "I'll escort you to your mother's house and then both of you ladies to the Mayor's, if you like."

"Alright. Um, do you think...could I buy something sweet to take to Prim?" Peeta raised his brow and pushed his stool back. When he returned, he held a small bag that looked to be full of cookies.

"For you ladies to share." She tugged on his hand, pulling him closer until she could lean in and give him a sweet kiss. She cupped his cheek for a moment and gave him a smile. The smile he returned lit up the room.

"Dad, I'm walking with Katniss to her mother's and then to Mayor Undersee's," he called as they exited the kitchen. "The toasting cake is finished, it just needs to set. I can add some flowers to it tomorrow morning."

"Perfect, thanks for your help, Peet. See if you can't convince your stubborn brother to take the day off tomorrow. It's his wedding day for goodness sake."

"I'll try, Pops," Peeta laughed. "Did Mom go take a nap?"

"I think she's taking care of the books up there. Here, I made some lunch for you to take with you." He slipped two wrapped sandwiches into a bag and handed it to Katniss.

"Thank you so much, Bran."

"I know my boy doesn't eat when he's working," he shot Peeta a wink. "I'll trust you to make sure he has food with him."

"Oh I'll make sure he eats," she turned to give her husband a defiant glare. Peeta scoffed.

"Like I have a choice when my family is ganging up on me."

"It's just because we love you," Bran said fondly. Peeta swallowed, his eyes moving from his father to Katniss, and he nodded.

"OK, we should be going. I'll see you tomorrow, Pops."

"Have a good night, you two." Katniss smiled at him as Peeta's hand rested on her lower back and steered her out of the bakery.

"I haven't seen your dad smiling like that in so long." He glanced sideways at her, his brow furrowed.

"He missed you, Peeta. He always looked miserable, it was really sad to see. Since we didn't know about the kidnapping, we all thought it was because you were…" she trailed off and Peeta's arm wound around her waist.

"Pops begged for them to leave me behind. He kept saying that I was just a kid and he would do anything. I was terrified they would hurt him for that. And really, I had no idea if the rest of them were ok until we finished our initial training in 2. Our superior allowed us to call our families and I know Pops was thinking we were dead. Mom even sounded like she was crying when we talked to them. And Pops and I were the closest. Mom preferred Bing and Rye, but I liked to be with Pops in the bakery and we would stay out of Mom's way. So I'm glad to see him smiling again too." She wrapped her arm around him and leaned into his side.

"Don't go away again," she said so softly he wasn't sure he was meant to hear it.

"I'm not going anywhere," he promised with a kiss on her hair.

"Morning Lieutenant Mellark! Mrs. Mellark." Darius greeted them with a nod.

"How is Rosie doing, Darius?"

"She's well, thank you for asking Mrs. Mellark." Katniss tried not to grimace at his formal tone.

"Anything of importance this morning, Darius?" Darius glanced over his shoulder and Peeta frowned.

"Jacobson requested a meeting with Commander Thread this morning, Lieutenant." Peeta's lips tightened.

"And?"

"I haven't heard anything further. But there is something else."

"Yes?"

"Commander Thread received word of another radio interference, picking up signals beyond the fence."

"That's four this week. Has anyone been assigned to this?"

"Not yet, sir. They are trying to determine the exact coordinates to see how far beyond 12 the signals are happening." Katniss frowned.

"There isn't anything beyond 12 except for the Wilds. Do you think someone is actually living in the Wilds?" Peeta and Darius exchanged looks and Katniss missed her husband subtly shaking his head.

"We don't know yet. It seems unlikely."

"More like impossible. The Wilds are supposed to be far worse than our woods on the border. Who could live there?"

"Commander Thread is calling a meeting this afternoon, Lieutenant. It is possible he will assign someone to investigate."

"Keep me informed, Darius," Peeta said in a low voice. "Katniss and I will be traveling to the Capitol sometime after the toasting." Darius's eyes widened and he looked eager about something.

"For how long...sir?"

"It is Aurelia Snow's birthday celebration so I expect we will stay for a few days at most."

"I hear tell of this restaurant, sir, you simply must try." Something flashed in Peeta's eyes and before Katniss could puzzle what it was, he cleared his throat.

"Katniss, love, why don't you step into the sweet shop and buy something for Prim? Here's a few coins. Get something for yourself as well."

"We don't need-"

"Nonsense, Katniss," Darius said with a chuckle. "Both of you Everdeen girls deserve something nice after all. Ah, sorry, a Mellark and an Everdeen." Peeta laughed but she could tell it was forced. Peeta's eyes swept the scene and he nodded to several other Peacekeepers who were patrolling the area. He pressed a couple of coins into her hand and held the door open for her.

"I'll be along in a moment." She tried not to huff as she passed by him; she knew she was behaving like an impudent child but she knew something was going on and she did not like being left in the dark. She wandered up and down the aisles, ignoring the looks from the shopkeepers, and selected a few different candies that she thought Prim would like. She grabbed a small bag of mints for herself and forced a smile as she spread it out on the counter. She handed over the coins, slipped the candy into her bag, and peered out the window. Darius and Peeta had their heads lowered and Darius was explaining something with his hands. She pushed the door open a crack, pressing herself against the wall.

"-meeting soon?"

"I agreed to go but only to keep her safe. I still don't like this, Darius. I don't like any of it."

"Who does, Peeta? Who actually likes the way things are in this country? That's why we need to do something. Panem needs change."

"I told him I won't do anything that will put her at risk. And he agreed to come with us to the Capitol."

"Good. He's a good one to have by your side when you're there. He knows it well enough."

"He knows more than he's letting on, though. That bothers me."

"Thread said the reports came from north of here. But our guy just left the district last week. I don't think he could have made it all the way to-"

"Katniss!" Peeta's head snapped up and Darius fell silent. "Did you find something tasty?"

"Yeah," she opened her bag. "And I got you some mints."

"My favorite," he accepted the candy and popped it into his mouth. "Well Darius, we should be going. Keep me informed, won't you?"

"Of course, Lieutenant. Have a good day, Katniss." Katniss nodded and Peeta tugged on her hand.

"Peeta, what is-"

"Don't, Katniss," he said quickly. "Not here."

"Where then? I'm not a child, I know something is going on."

"We can talk later."

"When?"

"Damn it Katniss," he gritted his teeth. "Will you please drop it until we get home? Please," his voice softened and Katniss huffed.

"Fine. We're almost to my mom's house, you can go on to work."

"I said I would escort both of you to Madge's house. Son of a-" he straightened up, a shadow cast over his face. "Good afternoon, Commander Thread."

"Lieutenant Mellark," Thread said in an eerily cheerful voice. "And Mrs. Mellark. Good afternoon to you both. Is it bring your wife to work day?" Peeta let out a bark of

laughter.

"No sir, of course not. I'm just escorting my wife to the Mayor's house before I see to my duties. She is assisting Miss Undersee with her final preparations for her wedding."

"Ah that's right. The wedding is tomorrow?"

"That's correct, sir."

"Well I just gave him the message but I will tell you too. I have called a meeting at seventeen hundred hours. I expect you will be there. It is imperative everyone is present."

"Of course, Commander."

"Good. I shall see you later then. Have a pleasant day, Mrs. Mellark." He nodded and went on his way. Peeta exhaled and squeezed Katniss's hand.

"Let's try to get to Prim before anything else interrupts us."

* * *

Prim excitedly pawed through the bag of candy and Katniss shook her head.

"I swear she's better behaved than this."

"What," Prim said, her mouth full of sweets. Violet practically hid her face in her hands behind them.

"Primrose," she sighed.

"Leave her alone," Peeta said, playfully tugging on Prim's braid. "She's allowed to enjoy the sweet things in life."

"I'm convinced I'm somehow related to you," Prim giggled. Behind them, Violet let out a gasp that she hastily turned into a cough.

"Mom, you ok?"

"This cough just won't go away," she gently beat her chest. "I'll be fine though. So you girls will be at Madge's house tonight?"

"I'll escort Prim home before curfew, Violet. I know Madge is grateful for Katniss's and Prim's help."

"I'll be at the Hawthornes tonight then. Hazelle has a terrible cough that just won't go away."

"Tell her I hope she feels better," Katniss said, worrying her lip between her teeth.

"I will. You girls have fun. Thank you, Peeta."

"No need to thank me. Have a pleasant evening, Violet." Peeta offered Katniss his arm and then with a smile, offered Prim his other one. She giggled and tossed her hair flirtatiously as she wound her arm around his.

"I can't believe how lucky I am! Two beautiful ladies on my arm."

"You're funny," Prim laughed, hitting his chest. Katniss raised a brow and found that she didn't particularly love seeing another female touching her husband...even if it was her own sister.

"Did Rory come by last night?" Prim's cheeks went pink.

"No but he asked me to go for a walk with him in the meadow on Sunday. I mean, I think he wants to get a head start on his school reading and-"

"Oh Prim, knock it off. He likes you and you like him. There's nothing wrong with that." Prim leaned around Peeta to glare at her sister suspiciously.

"You're not mad?"

"Why would I be mad?"

"Because you always say Rory is too headstrong and too impulsive and a bunch of other things that aren't too nice." Peeta gave Katniss an exasperated look and she scowled.

"I'm not ready for my baby sister to date. There I said it. Happy?"

"I'm fifteen, Katniss! There are several girls in my class who just got married!"

"Doesn't mean I'm ready for you to do it!"

"Hey," Peeta said softly, squeezing both of their hands. "Katniss is just being a good big sister and looking out for you."

"Oh please, you have to side with her because she's your wife," Prim scowled and Peeta decided all of the Everdeen women had perfected it.

"I don't have to-"

"Yes you do," Katniss cut him off. "It's in your best interest to agree with me."

"Is that a new rule of marriage? No one told me about it."

"Well I'm telling you now. Especially when I'm in an argument with my sister."

"Who is also my sister-in-law. Don't I have some kind of family obligation to take her side?"

"Your wife is more vital, in this case."

"Right. Sorry Prim." The younger girl rolled her eyes.

"Like I said, you have to side with her. Katniss, look, I'm not saying I'm ready to marry Rory. But I do like him. Can you just...stop teasing him so he will ask me out?"

"He has asked you out! He asked you to take a walk with him."

"I mean on a real date. He's afraid of you."

"Rory Hawthorne is NOT afraid of me!"

"Yes he is. He thinks you'll shoot him through the eye." Peeta snorted and hastily turned it into a cough.

"Fine. Tell him I won't shoot him, as long as he treats you right." Prim rolled her eyes again.

"And stop rolling your eyes at me."

"Where do you think I got it from?"

"Wow I am seriously regretting being in the middle right now," Peeta said under his breath.

"How you can stand being married to her," Prim whispered in his ear.

"I heard that!"

"Oh look, there's the Mayor's house! I'm sure Madge is anxious to start on her toasting details."

"And I'm sure you're anxious to get to work," Prim laughed.

"Don't know what you're talking about. Have a lovely evening, both of you." He squeezed Prim's hand and tried to kiss Katniss's but she yanked it away.

"No kisses for you since you keep taking her side."

"I was very clearly taking your side!" She crossed her arms while Prim snickered behind them.

"Very well. I still love you, even though you are denying me kisses." He swooped down and kissed her cheek, letting out a triumphant 'ha'. Katniss scowled but her lips curled upwards as soon as he had turned and made his way back down the path.

"I seriously don't know how he puts up with you."

"I seriously don't know how I put up with you. Come on. Madge is expecting us."


	22. Chapter 22

Madge had several small tasks to complete and her mother came downstairs to help them. The cook brought them a tray of tea and cookies and they all laughed softly as they stuffed little bags of fragrance for some of the guests and as they cut ribbon to wrap around bouquets of flowers. Peeta's meeting must have run late because when Katniss looked outside, the sun had set and the stars twinkled in the sky.

"Will we get in trouble for being out after curfew," Prim asked at her shoulder, peering up at the sky.

"Peeta is First Lieutenant," Madge said dismissively. "I'm sure there won't be a problem."

"I'm not sure, Madge. He said he wanted to obey the curfew rule as much as possible, so I don't know why he's so late."

"I have his office number. Would you feel better if we called him?" Katniss didn't want to admit that she felt worry gnawing at her and nodded, so Madge tugged her into the kitchen where the phone was and quickly dialed the number from the sheet of paper in her hand. She handed the phone to Katniss and she heard the line being answered.

"Mellark," he snapped impatiently. She bit her lip and turned to face the wall.

"Hi Peeta, it's me. Um. Katniss."

"Hi! Oh god Katniss, I'm so sorry, I got stuck. Between the meeting and then Thread gave me a dozen files to go through and now I'm just buried in paperwork. I'm so sorry."

"It's ok," she assured him. "Um, do you want me to walk Prim home?"

"Absolutely not. I'll leave in a few minutes and I will escort you both home. Stay inside until I get there, ok?"

"Ok. Um, be safe." She handed the phone back to Madge and nodded in thanks.

"He just got stuck at the office. He's on his way."

"See? I told you not to worry. Have you thought about what I asked you, by the way?"

"You mean sing at your toasting?" Madge nodded, looking hopeful.

"What would you want me to sing?"

"Anything you want! Really Katniss, it would mean so much to me."

"Ok. I'll do it." Madge threw her arms around her and Katniss was overwhelmed with the intense perfume of lilac.

"Thank you, Katniss, thank you! Our studio upstairs has great acoustics, it's where I used to practice my singing. If you want you can go up there and rehearse, until Peeta gets here." Katniss nodded and Madge skipped back into the living room. She racked her brain for a song to sing at the wedding but kept coming up empty. She rounded the corner and heard Mayor Undersee speaking in a low voice.

"I just saw it. Has anyone else seen it? Well. No doubts the Capitol is controlling the television waves. And you're sure this is it? Very well. No, I need to go. My daughter's wedding is tomorrow. Wait...it's coming back on. Are you watching?" Katniss peeked around the corner and saw the Mayor had his back turned to her, facing the television instead. She could just make out several figures on the screen, a woman with straight hair that was practically silver.

"What is she doing," the Mayor said angrily, still talking to whoever it was on the other line. He wasn't on the phone, that she could see. So what was it? A radio or some other kind of handheld device?

"She knows the implications- that's not the point! Damn. I have to go." Katniss heard a sound behind her and gasped, running toward the stairs. Madge grinned as she made her way up the steps.

"Hey there, I need to grab something from my room. You ok?" She noticed Katniss's pale face and she frowned.

"I'm fine. Thinking about what to sing tomorrow."

"Please don't stress yourself out about it," Madge said anxiously. "Hi Daddy."

"Hey sweetheart. Hello Katniss. Did I hear correctly? You're going to sing for Madge's ceremony?"

"Yes sir. She said I could borrow your studio to practice."

"Go right ahead. That door on the left, right beside Madge's bedroom."

"Thank you." She hurried to the studio and shut the door.

What was happening? Why was everyone keeping secrets and what did they mean?

She glared at the wall. She was going to have to get answers out of her husband, one way or another.

* * *

Peeta stood pressed against the wall, his wide eyes on the closed door. His wife's sweet voice captivated him and rendered him incapable of movement. Madge had sent him upstairs to get her, telling him she was practicing her song. She had a knowing gleam in her eye as Peeta took the stairs two at a time. Now he stood outside the room, listening to her soft voice. He decided if anything bad happened to him, he hoped she was nearby so he could ask for her song to die by.

"You could knock," a voice behind him made him jump.

"God Prim, you're almost as silent as your sister. Is that an Everdeen thing?"

"I stomped up these stairs. You're just a lovesick fool right now. I think you have a bit of drool on your chin."

"Your sister is a siren, really. She's captured my heart with her song."

"Wow does she have you wrapped around her little finger. Hey Katniss! Peeta's ready to walk us home!" She knocked on the door and Peeta immediately missed the melody. The door opened and Katniss looked surprised.

"How long have you been here?"

"Just a few minutes," he shrugged.

"More like twenty. He was drooling on himself when I came up the stairs." His face reddened and he murmured something about waiting by the door. Katniss shook her head and glared at her sister.

"You're terrible."

"I have never seen someone so in love with another person before. Not even Mom and Dad."

"You're too young to remember what they were like."

"Unimportant. Someone else is going to be so happy you decided to sing at the toasting."

"Come on, we need to get home. Mom is probably worrying about where you are."

* * *

Peeta offered his arms to the girls again but there was no teasing smile. He looked tense as he lead them through the district, glancing this way and that. They made sure Prim was safely in the house, and Katniss snuggled into his side as they made their way home. The night had turned cool and a light breeze made her shiver.

"Are you cold?"

"I'm fine," she said quickly. "Did you have dinner?"

"Yes, I ate my sandwich so you can report back to Dad that I'm not starving." She stifled her laughter and he winked.

"I like hearing you laugh. Even more so when I'm the one who makes you laugh."

"You're funny looking, what can I say?"

"Ha ha," he wrapped his arm around her, tickling her side.

"Stop," she shrieked, squirming away from him. "Stop, that tickles!"

"You called me funny looking," he said sternly. "Insult the husband, get attacked with tickles."

"No! No I'm sorry, I didn't mean it! You're very good looking."

"Liar."

"I'm not-stop! I'm not lying! You're handsome and you're...you're a great kisser! Please stop tickling me!" He laughed as he held his arms up in the air.

"Ok, ok, that last bit wins you clemency."

"Surprised she didn't mention your abilities in the bedroom, Mellark," a mocking voice came from the shadows. Peeta's laughter vanished from his face and he pulled her to his side.

"Not surprised that you're lurking in the shadows, Jacobson."

"It's quite late, Lieutenant. Surely you know the new rules about the curfew."

"Cut the shit, Jacobson. Commander Thread knows I have been at work all evening. I'm just escorting my wife home."

"How touching. But the rules apply to your wife as well. Just because she is with you doesn't mean she is excused from them."

"Return to your post, soldier, and leave us be," he said in a dangerous whisper.

"This is my post, Mellark. I have been assigned the task of punishing the law-breakers. And you two are breaking the law. You seem to think she's exempt from ALL the rules. I think you've been turning a blind eye to all of her transgressions."

"Stand down, soldier," Peeta growled, pushing Katniss behind him. "That's an order."

"Sounds like you won't be giving orders around here much longer, Lieutenant. Commander Thread was quite interested to know that you didn't tell Commander Cray about our little altercation. He was also very intrigued when I told him that your little wife is said to be the best huntress in the district. But the problem is, there's nothing to hunt in District 12, unless you went into the woods, which are Capitol property. He thinks you might be keeping something from him. Now why would you be doing that, I wonder?" Behind him, Katniss was shaking in fear but Peeta shook with rage. Jacobson smirked as he neared them.

"You think we don't know that your whore is the one who goes beyond the fence? I told you before, Mellark, Commander Thread won't just turn his head like Cray did. He is here to make an example of the law-breakers. And he will start with that Seam slut and her secret lover who you made excuses for." Two more men came out of the darkness and stood on either side of them; Peeta's eyes darted from from one soldier to another. They were all from 2 and had their own little clique. His eyes went back to Jacobson and narrowed.

"I'm still First Lieutenant here. Don't do anything stupid."

"You mean like challenge you? How you got to be Lieutenant is beyond me. Duartyr must have been on something when he promoted you."

"I'll be sure to tell him you think so." Katniss whimpered as the two soldiers came closer and Peeta felt her bury her face in his back.

"Last chance, Jacobson. Leave us alone and walk away and I won't report you for this."

"Come morning there will be a new promoted officer, Mellark. Commander Thread will reward me for turning in the person who keeps stealing from the Capitol. And I'm sure President Snow won't mind a traitor thrown in there as well." Jacobson lifted his chin and the two men attacked from both sides. Peeta threw his arms up but one of them caught him in his jaw and he fell to the ground. Katniss screamed and backed up against the building but Jacobson grabbed her and spun her around.

"Nuh uh, baby. You want to scream, go ahead. No one will come help you. You're going to watch while we kill your traitor husband." She tossed her head and writhed in his grip while the two men continued to kick Peeta.

"Jacobson, let her go," he called from the ground, curling on his side and grunting when a boot buried itself in his side.

"I said you're done giving orders, Mellark. And I think I will take this beauty back to my new office and show her what a real man can do. She can't have learned anything from a loser from District 12." Peeta grabbed one of the men's legs as he was about to kick; they heard a sickening crack and Peeta jerked him aside. He rolled away from the other man and found his way to his hands and knees.

"You seem to forget about my training, Jacobson," Peeta muttered. "I was there getting tortured and tear-gassed while you were harassing District 2 citizens. You have no idea what I am capable of..." Jacobson's hands wrapped around Katniss's throat and he took a few steps back. Peeta stood and held his hands out, his eyes on Jacobson's fingers.

"One more step, Mellark. I can snap her neck as easily as a twig." Peeta blinked blood out of his eyes and swallowed.

"You will all die as traitors in the Capitol," he said through gritted teeth.

"That's where you're wrong, Mellark. I know something else is going on in this district. Something big. And Commander Thread will discover what it is. So who else is involved? Your idiot brother? That loser Murphy?" Katniss squeezed her eyes shut as she tried to swallow. His beefy hands on her throat caused tears to stream down her cheeks. Jacobson laughed softly in her ear.

"Look, little wifey knows you're both goners. That's why she's crying." She jerked when she felt his tongue on her cheek, eagerly lapping up the salty stream. Peeta's eyes glittered with hatred and Jacobson buried his hand in Katniss's hair.

"Boys, finish him off. He's not going to give us answers so just get rid of him. I'll deal with the little wife." Peeta vaguely registered movement in the shadows but tensed up as he felt the others closing in on him. Jacobson grunted and fell forward, his eyes sliding closed. Katniss kicked at him and ran straight into Peeta's arms.

"Out cold," he heard his brother's voice. "Darius, you've got those two?"

"We've got them," said a women's voice, laced with disgust. "Lieutenant Mellark, what would you like us to do with these traitors?"

"Give me a moment, Purnia." He turned to Katniss and cupped her face. "Are you alright?"

"Am I alright," she asked, blinking back tears. "Peeta you're hurt! You could have- they almost- I can't believe that they…"

"Hey, hey," he whispered, wiping at her tears with his thumb. "I'm ok. I'm alright."

"You look like shit," Ryen shook his head.

"Thanks for that, bro. I'm sure you won't mind me being at your toasting with a black eye, right?"

"Least you're alive," he replied with a ginger smile. Peeta felt his ribs and winced.

"Yeah, barely."

"What the hell happened?" Darius straightened up and gestured toward the cuffed peacekeepers.

"Jacobson attacked us and summoned his cronies. We will take them to the Justice Building and I want someone to guard them until I can call in a report."

"Ok but you're not going anywhere," Ryen shook his head, "except home. Where your wife can fix you up."

"Actually it might be a better idea to go see his mother-in-law, since she's a Healer."

"I'm fine," Peeta protested but winced and grabbed at his ribs.

"I'd say at least one cracked rib, Lieutenant," Purnia said placatingly. "Let me call in some back-up and we will get you safely to your mother-in-law's house."

"I don't need...it's late, she's probably in bed-"

"She is not," Katniss cut him off. "And you need healing. We're going to see her. End of discussion."

"And your wife has spoken," Darius smiled. "Let me get this scumbag to the Justice Building and I'll be back with some help."

"We won't be able to move him easily," Purnia toed at Jacobson's limp form. "You hit him pretty good."

"I'll call in more hands. Peeta, ah, would you like for me to call the Commander?"

"No. I'll deal with it, Darius. Thank you for your help, all of you."

"Hey asshole, use your legs," Darius smacked one of the soldiers in the back of the head and yanked him to his feet. Purnia grabbed the other one and turned back to Peeta, Ryen, and Katniss.

"Stay with the Lieutenant and his wife, Mellark. Jacobson isn't going anywhere." Ryen nodded and bent down to cuff Jacobson. Katniss helped Peeta lean against the brick wall and Purnia and Darius dragged their prisoners off down the road. Katniss opened her bag and pulled out a clean cloth, immediately starting to clean the cuts on his face. He winced but tried to focus on her soft hands pushing his hair out of his eyes and stroking his cheek.

"All of this is because of me," she whispered sadly. His eyes shot open and he sat up.

"No don't you dare think that. This is because that man is an asshole. And because we still have some stupid division between districts, so anyone close to the Capitol automatically thinks they are better than everyone else. Jacobson never liked me and I'd say he was jealous of my position and Duartyr's high opinion of me. But I didn't do myself any favors when I hit him after he arrested Gale. It's not your fault, Katniss."

"I can't believe they would attack their Lieutenant," she shook her head and Ryen scoffed.

"You have to recognize someone's position in order to respect it. Jacobson and his idiots have never recognized Peeta as our First Lieutenant. And Peet probably went through more than the rest of us during training. He earned that title." Peeta groaned and leaned his head against the wall. Katniss stroked his hair and dabbed at his wounds with the cloth. What did they do to her sweet baker in those training courses, she wondered for the hundredth time.

"I'm afraid to look under your shirt," she said softly. "My mom is the healer."

"It's ok," he squeezed her hand. "They're not broken, I know that for sure. It just hurts to breathe right now." Ryen crouched next to his brother and patted his shoulder.

"Can I get you anything, baby bro? To make you a little more comfortable?"

"Want to give me one of your lungs? I could use another one right about now."

"Sure Peet. It's yours. Katniss can tell Madge we missed the toasting because we were in the Capitol having a transplant." The brothers snorted and Katniss rolled her eyes.

"How can boys joke at a time like this?"

"Cause it's better than acknowledging how fucking terrified we are," Ryen said matter-of-factly.

"Rye...before the others get here," Peeta opened his eyes and pulled his brother closer. "I need you to promise me...whatever happens...if something happens to me… you will watch over her." Ryen's eyes flicked from his brother to Katniss and he nodded.

"Of course, Peet. Of course I will."

"You better stop talking like this, Peeta Mellark," she said in a high-pitched whine. "I mean it!"

"It's ok, Katniss," Peeta said soothingly. "I just want to be prepared is all."

"Prepared? For what?"

"Relax Kat, it's a precaution we all take. It's the life of a soldier. We just want our loved ones to be taken care of in case anything happens. And Peet just wants you provided for."

"I told you I'm not going anywhere," Peeta pulled her hand to his lips. "You'll probably get sick of me eventually cause I'm not leaving your side." She burrowed into his arms and tucked her head under his chin. His eyes found his brother's before he closed them, listening to the sound of her heart racing.

* * *

When Darius and Purnia returned, Jacobson was still unconscious. Luckily they had brought more than enough backup and several of the men asked Peeta if they could do anything for him. Katniss noted her husband putting on a brave face, hiding his pain and standing up straight while talking to the peacekeepers in low voices. He patted their arms or shook their hands and he smiled. He really did care about his soldiers, she noticed immediately. Peeta really would make an excellent leader.

He tried to go with them to the Justice Building but Purnia practically dragged him toward the Seam.

"You are going home," she said sternly, "and resting. Don't come into work tomorrow."

"Purnia, I'm going to have to deal with this in the morning." Purnia fixed her blue eyes on Katniss and they were hard as steel.

"Do what you have to do to keep him home, Mrs. Mellark. Tie him to the bed if you need."

"She might enjoy that a little too much," Darius laughed softly.

"They both might," one of the men who was carrying Jacobson chuckled. Katniss's face was burning and Peeta cleared his throat.

"Soldiers, that's enough." The laughter died off and several cleared their throats. Ryen tried to help support Peeta but he seemed determined to show only strength in front of the other peacekeepers.

"Get some rest, Lieutenant Mellark," one of the younger soldiers said earnestly. "You'll let us know if we can do anything to help?"

"I will, thank you, Peacekeeper Burns." The men split off and Purnia and Ryen continued to walk with them through the Seam.

"Really Purnia, I'm fine," Peeta said quietly. "You can go on home."

"I'll make sure my Lieutenant is taken care of," she said stiffly. They were silent as they approached the small house and Katniss knocked sharply. Violet's worried face peered through the crack and she gasped.

"Katniss? What's going on?"

"Peeta is hurt. Can we come in?" She threw the door open and urged them inside.

"Thank you, Purnia. Rye, go home and get some rest. You don't want to look like shit at your own toasting."

"You're sure? I can stay and walk you both home-"

"We can stay here tonight if we need to," Katniss shook her head. "He might not be able to walk that far anyway."

"Right. Ok, I'll see you both tomorrow. Take care of him," he added in a whisper. Katniss nodded and shut the door.

"Mama, who's at the door?"

"Prim get me a bowl of water and some clean towels. Some salve from the cabinet too." Prim and her mother immediately slipped into nurse mode, while Katniss helped Peeta sit in the kitchen chair.

"Shirt needs to come off," she whispered, sliding her hands under the material. He grimaced as they worked to pull it off and she gasped at the sight of the ugly bruise on her husband's fair skin. Her mother shook her head when she saw the injury.

"Broken ribs would look much worse. But that bruise worries me. Katniss, clean up his face for me while I tend to this." Katniss nodded and took the bowl of water from her mother. Peeta winced as she carefully wiped his face clean, dabbing at the injuries. Prim brought a bottle of salve and an ice pack from the freezer.

"Hold that to your eye." Peeta nodded in thanks and pressed it to his face.

"I'm going to prod a bit, Peeta. You let me know if it hurts."

"Yes ma'am." She started high up, gently prodding with the tips of her fingers. When she trailed lower, he winced. When she touched a certain spot, he hissed and clenched the table with white knuckles.

"That's more than bruised. What about here?" She pressed down and he cried out. Katniss glared at her mother but Violet merely nodded.

"Two cracked ribs, it seems. Here," she handed him a pill and a glass of water. "For the pain. I have another for when you wake up. Were you two planning to stay the night?"

"I'm not sure if he can walk home," Katniss said quietly.

"I'll sleep with Prim and he can sleep in my bed. It's big enough for him to be comfortable."

"Really Violet, I can walk home tonight. I don't-gah!" She prodded the area with her knuckles and his palm slammed down on the tabletop, his eyes squeezing shutt. Violet shook her head again.

"I don't want you going anywhere. I want to make sure that fracture doesn't get worse overnight. You'll sleep here. Katniss, get him a clean pillow and blanket out of the closet." She nodded and ran to the closet in the hall. Both pillow and blanket were threadbare but she knew he wouldn't care. He was still from District 12, despite his current position. When she returned to the kitchen, her mother was wrapping his torso and was talking in a low voice, so she pressed herself to the wall.

"-used to wrap this more tightly but I don't want you to have more difficulty breathing. And we will just keep this on for a few hours at most. Keep this ice pack on the painful area all night. We will check on the swelling in the morning."

"Thank you, Violet. I'm lucky to have a healer for a mother-in-law."

"You're a good boy, Peeta. So much like your father. I know you'd do anything for my girls and that means everything to me. I know your love for her runs deep."

"Is it that obvious?"

"To everyone but her, it seems." Peeta chuckled softly and winced as she finished binding the bandage.

"You go on to bed and get some sleep. Katniss should have everything set up for you." He nodded and stood.

"For the record, Violet, I know my dad's feelings for you have remained the same over the years. He was happy for you but he never stopped loving you. We're the same, in that way."

"She doesn't love anyone else like that, Peeta." He shrugged and clutched his side.

"Maybe not. But I want her to love me because that's what her heart says to do. Not because I saved her or provided for her."

"Marriage of necessity is quite common these days," she said gently. "It's not a bad thing."

"No," he agreed. "But it's not what my heart wants. And I used to think I would take anything; whatever possible way to be with her but now that I know how it feels to kiss her and hold her, I don't know if my heart can take any indifference. I need it to be real."

"Then you should talk to her. Say all of this to her and not to me."

"I don't want to frighten her away."

"You underestimate my girl, Peeta. Katniss is a fighter. And she fights for those she loves."

"Well I hope one day I can count myself among those lucky few."

"It sounds like you already can." There was silence and Katniss chewed on her lip for a moment.

"Good night, Violet."

"Sleep well, Peeta." She heard his heavy footsteps moving closer and she retreated back toward the stairs. He huffed as he reached for the stair rail and she pressed herself to his side so he could lean into her.

"I hate this," he groaned. "Your mom shouldn't be kicked out of her own room!"

"Don't try to argue with them," she shrugged. "And count yourself lucky. Most injured people in this house sleep on the table."

"I should have offered to do that! Or at least take the smaller room."

"Don't be stupid. You're family. Mom won't let you be any more uncomfortable than you already are."

"Katniss," her mother called from the kitchen.

"Can you make it up by yourself?"

"I'm not 5, Katniss." He leaned toward the stair rail and pulled himself up. Katniss watched him with a frown before returning to the kitchen. Her mother was putting the salve and bandages away.

"Keep an eye on him tonight. That wrap doesn't need to be on all night, just a few hours. And I have more ice if he needs it."

"Ok. Thanks Mom." Violet cupped her daughter's chin and gave her a sad smile.

"Are you alright?"

"I'm fine," she jerked her face out of her mother's grasp.

"I know you're worried for him, but he knows how to handle himself."

"Yeah, he handled himself well when he was bleeding on the ground, getting the shit kicked out of him. And he was worried about me the whole time! That's ridiculous."

"That's how it is when a person loves another person, sweetie." Katniss shook her head. She didn't take well to her mother's pet names and affectionate caresses. Why was it all of a sudden ok for her mother to act like a mother? She huffed and grabbed the salve.

"I'm going up to sit with him. See you in the morning."

"Sleep well, dear."

When she entered the room, Peeta was sitting on the edge of the bed, his feet planted firmly on the ground. He looked up as she neared the bed, and opened his mouth as she leaned over to fluff the pillow. She refused to meet his eyes until he grabbed her hand and pulled it to his chest.

"I'm sorry for the way I spoke to you."

"Doesn't matter," she shrugged but he pulled her closer so she was standing between his legs.

"It does matter. This just...reminded me of... another time. And I don't like it. But I shouldn't take it out on you. You're the only thing that matters to me right now and I appreciate you trying to help me."

She stroked his hair and he leaned forward to rest his forehead against her stomach.

"You should get some rest." She gently pushed him back to the pillows and lifted his feet to the blanket.

"Are you comfortable?" It was a stupid question, she realized, but he nodded.

"Very."

"Good. I'll sleep on the floor so I don't-"

"No way," he sat up, groaning and wincing. "Ow. No, I mean, come up here with me. You are not sleeping on the floor."

"I don't want to hurt you."

"Katniss," he said as he rolled his eyes.

"Peeta," she fired right back. He gave her a patronizing look then looked pointedly at the bed.

"Fine but if I make that injury worse, I'll be so mad at you."

"I'll take my chances." She stood beside him and shook her head.

"You'll be more comfortable if you take your pants off."

"Katniss, I can't...we're in your mother's house," he blushed.

"I didn't mean we will do anything! You can barely move, Peeta, I'm not going to jump your bones. I just want you to be comfortable." He exhaled softly and nodded as he stood up. She helped him slide them down his legs and he fell back onto the bed. She climbed over him so she wouldn't aggravate his injured side.

"Come here," he held out his arm, and she rested her head on his chest. He turned into her and kissed her temple. She ran a finger across the bandage and sighed.

"Think you can get some sleep?"

"I'll try. You get some rest, Katniss. And stop blaming yourself."

"The men might respect you a little more if you weren't married to a… to someone from the Seam."

"Hey." He cupped her chin and turned her head to look at him. His face was stern, his brows drawn together. "You'd better banish those thoughts right now. Don't you dare call yourself anything of the sort. This has nothing to do with you, ok? These men have never liked me and have challenged me more than a few times. They don't like the fact that I come from 12 and have more power than they do. They have never respected me. So get those thoughts out of your mind, alright?"

She nodded gingerly and tucked her head under his chin. They were quiet and she thought he might have fallen asleep if it weren't for the staggered breaths he kept taking.

"What did you mean?" He pulled away so he could look down at her.

"When?"

"When you said it reminds you of another time. What did you mean by that?" He closed his eyes for a moment and squeezed, his face pained.

"I told you before, I got...hit as a child. One day it went a little too far and...I had some trouble walking normally. Only Bing knew what had happened and he tried to help me walk everywhere. I was angry and was quite short with him. I screamed at him that I wasn't a child and ran away to the meadow. Which was dumb because she hit me more when I came home late that night." She listened silently, unconsciously wrapping her arm around him and pulling him close, daring anyone to try to take him from her.

"She hit you so hard you couldn't walk straight?"

"Rolling pins don't mesh well with bones," he said softly. "She didn't break anything but it hurt like hell for awhile. I don't even remember what I did to make her so angry. But that's why I snapped at you. It just...took me back." He reached over and pushed the hair out of her eyes.

"I've always had a hard time letting people take care of me," his voice was soft. "As the youngest, you'd think it wouldn't be a problem but I try to take care of people and find it difficult to depend on others. I guess that's why it feels strange when you make a fuss. Like you really care."

"I do care, Peeta," she said indignantly, sitting up. He propped himself on his elbow and stroked her cheek with his knuckles.

"I know," he said softly, his lips curving upwards. "It's incredible. Because it's not just someone caring about me...it's you." She leaned down to kiss him and his hand moved to her hair.

"You scared me tonight," she whispered against his lips.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't apologize. Just promise me that you'll stay safe."

"I'm tougher than I look, love."

"That's not what I mean. Stop trying to protect everyone."

"Says the girl who has hunted illegally to provide for her family." But it wasn't condescending, just gentle and maybe a little sad.

"That's different," she argued.

"I'm not going to argue with you, Katniss. I promise you I will stay safe." She nodded and kissed his shoulder before lying back down.

"Good. Because if anything happened to you… I wouldn't survive it." Her voice was so soft it was a wonder that he had heard her. But he did. His heart raced as she rested her head on his chest and his arm wrapped around her. Perhaps her mother was right. Perhaps she did-

"I'm falling in love with you," the words escaped her lips as she was pulled into Morpheus's dream world. Peeta gasped softly, his eyes darting to her still form. She smacked her lips and turned into him, her cheek warm against his skin. His hand hovered over her head, almost afraid to touch her lest she was an apparition that would disappear before his eyes.

"I love you, Katniss," he whispered, his fingers sliding through her dark locks. "For always." The pain in his side faded, as if her words had healed him completely. He shifted more onto his side so he could slide his arm under her, pulling her to his chest. He rested his chin on her head and closed his eyes. For the first time in years, he didn't have a single nightmare.

* * *

 _ **I'm so sorry guys, work has been crazy hectic and I just took a little vacation getaway and it's all just been chaos! We've got the Toasting coming up next chapter, and Katniss's first trip the Capitol soon- I promise it won't be this long again! Thanks for your awesome reviews and messages! Keep em coming! XOXOXO**_


	23. Chapter 23

Unlike Peeta, Katniss was plagued by nightmares. She woke up in a sweat, dazed and confused, until her eyes landed on her husband and she could see he was perfectly safe. Before him, it was always nightmares of Prim in the Hunger Games. Or her father being blown to bits. Now she saw Peeta as a bloody mess on the floor, with a group of men holding blood-stained batons over his motionless body.

On her fourth attempt to go back to sleep, she sat up and leaned down to check his injury. She didn't want to wake him but the bandage looked to be too tight and her mother had said to only keep it on for a few hours. She didn't know what time it was but it was still dark outside. She climbed out of the bed and crouched by his side. She tenderly unwrapped the bandage and shifted him to his side so she could pull it away from his skin. The bruise was even bigger and uglier, making her wince.

"Pretty awful, huh," his soft voice made her jump.

"I'm sorry I woke you."

"I woke up and you were gone. Didn't even register that you were being Dr. Everdeen."

"I just wanted to get this bandage off. Let's put the ice back on it for a little bit." But she saw the ice had melted and the bag was dripping.

"Ok, let me go get some more."

"It's fine, Katniss."

"Stay here," she said firmly before creeping down the stairs and into the kitchen. She re-filled the bag of ice, then grabbed another for his face. His eye looked worse as well and she didn't think it would do to have the First Lieutenant looking so beat down.

She returned to the bedroom and handed him the bag to put against his ribs. He winced at the cold and she climbed over him, setting the other bag against his face.

"I must look a mess."

"So-so," she shrugged. He chuckled and pulled her other hand to his lips. She positioned the ice over his eye and he sighed heavily.

"You should try to sleep some more."

"I'm ok. Actually the pain is what woke me up. Feels like someone is twisting a knife in my side."

"Let me find you something for the pain."

"I'm ok, Katniss," he said again. "Just stay with me."

"You're in a Healer's house. You shouldn't be in pain. Just give me a moment." He tried to protest as she climbed off the bed again but she hurried back to the kitchen and dug through the cabinet of herbs. Finding a tin of ginger and willow bark, she rushed to the stove to make a pot of tea. She stirred the herbs into his cup, then grabbed one for herself and tiptoed back up the stairs.

"Here, this should help." He took the cup of tea and sipped eagerly.

"Wow," he glanced over at her. "The pain is already fading."

"Mom knows her herbs."

"So do you, it seems."

"My dad had this plant book… he wanted us to know which plants we could eat and which ones to avoid. It's difficult because there are no drawings to go with it but he described them well."

"I can help you with the drawings, if you like." She smiled and her fingers entwined with his.

"I'd like that."

"So your dad was fond of flowers… Violet, Katniss, Primrose."

"Katniss isn't really a flower. The actual term is Sagitarria, or arrowhead plant."

"Appropriate," he said with a smile.

"But he once told me, as long as you can find yourself, you'll never starve. I used to bring katniss tubers home for Mom to cook."

"I think it has petals on it, though. I once asked my Dad when I was a boy to draw me a katniss flower… for obvious reasons."

"Obvious," she giggled, shaking her head.

"But anyway, he drew three small white petals. It was pretty, I thought."

"I think he liked the idea of it being a useful plant. His name was Ash, which is one of the toughest kinds of trees. I remember him being really gentle though. He always had a smile and he always brought my mom a flower when we went into the woods together." Peeta smiled as he watched her face. Hearing her talk about her father made her light up and he loved that.

"Do you think he would have approved of me?"

"You've done everything to take care of his daughter. He would have loved you."

"Even though I'm a Peacekeeper?" She shrugged and he bit his lip.

"I don't think it matters."

"Katniss...why is it your mother didn't re-marry?"

"Who would she marry?"

"I just mean…she knew how bad things had gotten for you and Prim. She could have married a peacekeeper...instead of you doing it." She sank back against the pillows and crossed her arms.

"Mom completely lost herself when Daddy died. I don't think she would ever consider marrying someone else, no matter how bad things get. I don't know if she's always been this selfish but I try not to judge her as harshly as I did when I was younger. It's hard though. I basically had to take care of Prim by myself for 8 years.

She started to come back to us a few years ago but she still has these moments where she's lost in her grief." Peeta was silent, his thoughts racing. She still should have volunteered to marry to save her daughters, he decided. Could he judge her if her daughter didn't?

"Peeta?" He was snapped from his thoughts and his eyes met hers.

"Do you think Jacobson and Thread are plotting against you?" He raised a brow.

"Why do you think that?"

"Jacobson mentioned that he had talked to Thread...and all that stuff about how he was going replace you."

"That's just him spewing bullshit, Katniss, don't worry. Jacobson was an idiot in training. Duartyr hated him, in fact, and almost didn't allow him to graduate from training. Only reason he did was because someone in 2 put in a good word for him. No, I don't think Thread has allied himself with Jacobson. That's not to say we shouldn't be careful though. But I am going to the Justice Building in the morning to make an official report. Jacobson and his cronies will be sent away from 12."

"Do you trust Thread?"

"Katniss, he's my Commander. You can't really ask me that."

"You said you hated him," she argued. He sighed and leaned against the bed frame.

"Fine. As a Peacekeeper, I respect him and am loyal to him. As a citizen of District 12, I despise him and everything he stands for."

"How do you keep from going crazy? Losing yourself completely?"

"It's not without difficulty," he said carefully. "Sometimes I have to really remind myself where I come from and what I have endured over the years. What others close to me have endured, all in the name of keeping peace. I will say, though, coming back to 12 and being with you has given me...well, a sense of clarity. The road ahead will be a difficult one but I finally feel like I'm headed in the right direction."

"What do you mean? Why are you-"

"You don't need to worry about it," he said softly. "Now try to get some more sleep."

"You're keeping me in the dark about something," she huffed. "And I don't like it."

"Because it's safer that way. At least for now. I'll tell you everything I can, Katniss, just not tonight... I need to do some thinking. And I need to make some phone calls in the morning. Most importantly, I need to focus on my brother's wedding day."

"Ok," she reluctantly conceded. "But after the toasting...you'll tell me?"

"I'll answer your questions as best I can," he kissed her forehead. "Go back to sleep. You looked so peaceful while you were dreaming. And you say the loveliest things." She settled on his chest again only to dart back up.

"Wait, what did I say?" He chuckled and shook his head.

"It doesn't matter."

"Wish you would stop saying that," she grumbled. "It matters to me."

"If you don't remember what you said, then it really doesn't matter. Maybe you'll say it again one day. I hope you will." She racked her brain, trying to remember what she could have said to him. He gave her a sad smile and stroked her hair.

"Dream sweet dreams, love." But she didn't find them. Only nightmares that left her heart racing and her face streaked with tears.

* * *

When Katniss opened her eyes again, she could see the sun was starting to rise and Peeta stirred fitfully beside her. The ice packs were melted again and lay discarded while he slept on his good side. She softly pushed his hair back and left a sweet kiss on his cheek. He awoke not long after that and she helped him with his shoes and pants before they made their way downstairs. Violet was awake and was swirling something around in a vial.

"How are you feeling, Peeta?"

"Just fine. Katniss gave me some tea with herbs in it early this morning."

"He said he was in a lot of pain."

"Let me check on those fractures. Let's hope the ice helped the swelling some." Katniss fetched his discarded shirt while she examined his side.

"It doesn't look any worse. I don't think you should return to work just yet though. At least if you do, keep to desk work. You could make the fracture worse and could have more serious injuries. Those ribs are too close to important internal organs."

"I'll take it easy," he said as he slipped his shirt back on. "Thank you for everything, Violet. Katniss, I need to get home and change before I head to the Justice Building. Can I escort you back, or would you prefer to stay here?"

"I'll come with you." They said goodbye to her mother and slowly headed back toward the barracks. He winced a few times but tried to keep his back straight as he walked. Katniss admired his bravado but right now, he was being stubborn. There weren't even any people around to see his brave face! She tucked herself into his good side and wrapped her arm around his waist. Making sure to avoid his injury, she took his hand and leaned her head against him so that he was forced to bend a little in order to hold her.

"Sneaky," he muttered.

"Don't know what you're talking about," she shrugged. "Everyone is still asleep anyway, Peeta, so I don't know who you're pretending for."

"Fine. Come here." He whirled her around and leaned down to kiss her. She gasped at the abruptness but his hands in her hair made her moan and his tongue raked across her bottom lip before he pulled away. When she opened her eyes, he grinned and shrugged.

"I guess I don't have to pretend for you."

"You don't. Let's get you home. The sooner you go to the Justice Building, the sooner you can come home and rest before the toasting."

* * *

Katniss worried about him the whole day. She knew she should probably go to Madge's to see if she could help with anything but she also wanted to stay close to the phone, in case Peeta called. She scowled at the wall and shook her head. What was wrong with her? She didn't act this way. She had asked him how he had kept from losing himself completely but maybe she should reevaluate herself and ask the same question. She didn't really recognize herself anymore. She had never hidden behind a man before so what made her her do that last last night?

"This is ridiculous," she told herself as she scrubbed at the one dish in the sink, just to give her something to do. "You're Katniss Everdeen of District 12. You don't fawn or giggle like some schoolgirl and you certainly don't wait for a man to solve the problem. Hell no, that's not who you are. And if Peeta wants a wife like that… well, this will be a long five years."

Would this new Peeta who had become a Peacekeeper want someone like that? Submissive and meek?

She shook her head and threw aside the towel. Doing the dishes just made her feel more domestic and she wasn't in the mood for that. Instead, she went into the living room to practice her song for the toasting.

* * *

Around midday, she decided to take a quick shower and was studying her reflection, wondering what to do with her hair, when she heard the front door open.

"Katniss?"

"In the bedroom," she called, grabbing a robe from his closet and wrapping it tightly before going to greet him. He wasn't wearing his heavy uniform, he moved with a slight limp, and he was paler than she had ever seen him.

"What-" She couldn't complete the sentence before his arms were around her, his face buried in her wet hair.

"Peeta, what happened?"

"I don't want to talk about it. Can I just hold you for a moment? Is that alright?"

"Ok but come here." She pulled him into the living room and made him sit on the couch so he would be more comfortable. She curled up beside him and he turned into her, wrapping his arms around her again. He was silent, though his breathing was heavy and she reached up to stroke his hair. He was shaking, from what,

Katniss had no idea.

"At least tell me you're alright," she whispered.

"I don't deserve to be. I'm a monster." She jerked back, so she could look at him and he lowered his head. She cupped his chin to make him look at her and she frowned as she searched his sad eyes.

"I have already told you, you are no monster."

"Then why do I continue to commit such heinous crimes?" Her brow furrowed further.

"What are you-"

"I made a call to my superior in District 2 this morning. Duartyr was furious when he heard what happened and he made a call to the Capitol. The Minister of Defense contacted Thread and we had a holo meeting with him, Duartyr, Thread, and myself. Minister Antonius stripped Jacobson and the others of their stations and demanded they be sent to the Capitol on the first available train. But that didn't satisfy Duartyr and Antonius."

"What did he-"

"Duartyr has had some problems with Jacobson in the past, it seems. Thread said Jacobson has been spreading lies around here too, so this was the last straw. Antonius wanted the three men brought into the room so he could speak to them. He said they were traitors and deserved a traitor's punishment." Katniss's stomach churned as he spoke, but she didn't interrupt him.

"He wanted me to do it...he said I deserved the honor. It wasn't honor, Katniss, it was torture. I didn't want to do it….I wanted to refuse...but the way Thread was watching me...it was like he expected me to protest. They wanted me to be like them! They've turned me into a piece in their fucked up game!"

"It's ok," she said softly, trying to soothe him. He jerked away from her soft hand, reaching for his face, and shook his head.

"We turned him into an avox." Katniss's eyes widened and she felt sick.

"They made you...cut his tongue out?"

"Thread stood behind him and ordered him to stick his tongue out. He refused, so Thread threatened to shoot him in the head. Jacobson was sobbing and pleading for me to show him mercy. I did it as quick as I could but the blood, Katniss, god there was so much blood and I just...I can't believe...I can't-" he fell forward into her arms and his body shook with sobs.

"They've made me do some terrible things in training. Really terrible things. But to render someone speechless, to take away their voice... how can you say I'm not a monster for that?"

"Remorse, Peeta. It's all over your face, it's in your voice, and it's in your tears. A monster doesn't feel guilt over their actions. You are still the good baker's son that I...that means so much to me." She stroked his cheek and he closed his eyes.

"So you're safe? Thread doesn't believe Jacobson?"

"I don't think so. Thread is familiar with my training and Duartyr speaks highly of me. I think they all just view Jacobson as a jilted officer who is spreading lies."

"So it's over?"

"For now." She leaned forward and pressed a kiss to his strong jaw. He reached up to cup her cheek, his forehead pressing to hers before their lips met. She was on the verge of climbing into his lap when she remembered his injury.

"How is your side?"

"Painful. Thread sent me home after we put the men on the train to the Capitol. He said to get some rest before the toasting, and he actually told me to take the entire weekend off." Katniss was shocked; she did not expect his commander to be so understanding.

"I'm just glad you're alright." He pulled her hand to his lips and found her eyes.

"You're not disgusted with me?"

"No Peeta. You're doing your job and I can't begrudge you for that. He deserved what he got."

"I'm not sure I would say that but they're off to the Capitol to become servants. Who knows which is better, death or servitude?"

"Hey, I brought the herbs home with me," she said in an attempt to distract him. "Stay here and I'll make you some tea." She jumped off the couch and blushed, realizing she was still naked under the robe.

Peeta seemed to realize this too; he set the mug of tea on the table to cool before pulling her into his lap, her legs draping on both sides of him. He leaned up to kiss her, his hands moving to the sash of the robe and tugging roughly. His lips tore away from hers and found her breast, closing around her nipple. She moaned loudly as she tossed her head back, his hand moving up to massage the other globe.

"Peeta," she whined and his control snapped at the sound of his name. He lay her down on her back and moved his hand down between her legs, finding her curls damp with want. His mouth went back to suckling at her breast as he pushed in a finger and curled it inside her. She grabbed at the back of the couch and arched her back.

"I need to taste you, love. Can I?"

"P-Peeta. Please."

"God I love it when you say my name like that." He kissed his way down her stomach and spread her legs wide. His warm breath on her center made her shiver and she looked down to see his blue eyes locked on her. He was on the verge of swiping at her folds, when there was a pounding on the door.

"Shit," he muttered. Deciding to ignore it, he kissed her hipbone and added a second finger, moving them slowly, teasing her to no end. The knocking came again, louder.

"Peet! Open up!"

"Damn it all to hell," he sighed as he sat up and ran his fingers through his hair. "I'm so sorry, Katniss."

"Let me go get dressed," she said as she tied the robe closed and hurried into the bedroom. Peeta had to adjust his slacks before he yanked the door open. Ryen's face was pale and worried as he stepped inside.

"Are you alright?"

"Of course I'm alright. Why wouldn't I be?" Breathe, Peeta, he told himself. He doesn't know he's interrupting something and it's not his fault.

"Darius told me what happened. He said you seemed pretty out of it when you left the train station. I wanted to come straight to you but Thread had me finish up some paperwork since he is giving me a few days off."

"He gave me the weekend off too. I'm fine, Rye, really." Ryen's eyes searched for a lie but his brother wore his mask well. Rye knew better than anyone how Peeta's training had affected him but he said nothing as he continued to watch his brother.

"Where is Katniss?"

"She was in the shower when I got home a few minutes ago."

"Here, Madge asked me to give her this." He handed him a dress, folded in paper and Peeta took it with a bemused expression.

"For the toasting?"

"Yeah, she said she let Katniss pick a dress but she forgot it when she left last night."

"I'll pass it on to her. How are you feeling? Are you ready?"

"I'd feel a lot better if my little brother didn't look to be in so much pain."

"I'll be fine," Peeta said dismissively, reaching for his tea. "Katniss gave me some herbs from her mother's kitchen and they really help. I only look weakened. Really, I'm alright."

"You're my brother, Peeta," Rye said in a serious tone. "You don't have to lie for my benefit."

"You need to get out of here and get ready for your toasting. Quit worrying about me." The bedroom door opened and Katniss walked out, dressed in trousers and a clean shirt with her hair braided on the side.

"Katniss, take care of him, will you?"

"I will. More tea, Peeta?" She didn't wait for an answer before she grabbed his cup and took it to the kitchen. She heard the brothers talking in low voices as she poured more warm tea into the mug. She added another teaspoon of willow bark and added a mint leaf for flavor.

Peeta entered the kitchen, sighing heavily.

"It's my big brother's wedding day and all he can think about is his pathetic baby brother."

"He cares about you," she said firmly, pressing the mug into his hand. "There's nothing wrong with that. You have to let people take care of you, Peeta. You have to let people in." He took a sip of tea and smacked his lips.

"That's really good. And I feel better already."

"Finish it all, then get changed. I think I have an idea how to hide those bruises." Peeta's brow raised as he surveyed her over the cup.

* * *

"Hold still," she insisted.

"It tickles," he protested.

"You're acting like a baby."

"Forgive me, I'm not used to wearing make up," he rolled his eyes.

"I'm not either but I didn't squirm this bad when Prim did mine on our wedding day."

"Katniss, are you sure about this?"

"It's working already. Here, have a look." She handed him a mirror and his eyes widened as he reached up to touch his eye.

"You can hardly see anything."

"I think Madge secretly wants to be a stylist. She was too excited to do mine and Prim's hair and make up the last few days." Peeta chuckled as he set the mirror down.

"I can't do anything about that split lip but at least the bruises aren't as obvious."

"You're amazing," he said fondly, as she packed the powder away.

"Madge sent this with the dress she gave me. Think she's trying to tell me to dress up for her wedding?"

"Well, I may have learned that it's useless to give you orders but I suppose other people still haven't realized how foolish that is." She shook her head with a smile.

"You're all set. It's a good thing your skin is so fair; you can't even tell you're wearing makeup unless you're really close."

"Thank you, Katniss." He stood and grabbed his jacket from the back of the chair. "Shall I escort you to Madge's before I go to the bakery?"

"Oh I was going to pick up Prim first. You can go meet your brothers." Peeta looked wary as he tied his shoelaces.

"I really don't like the idea of you ladies walking alone."

"It's still light out, Peeta. We will be fine."

"Promise me that you'll be careful. That you'll keep your eyes peeled for even the smallest sign of danger. I know you're observant."

"I'll pay attention. Look, you double knot your shoelaces," she indicated his shoes and he glanced at his feet before giving her a bemused look. "See? I'm observant. Now go be with your brothers. I'll see you at the toasting." He cupped her chin and leaned down to kiss her.

"Be careful."

"You too." He draped his jacket over his arm, cast her one last look, and closed the door behind him. Sighing, Katniss headed into the bedroom to change and put on a little bit of makeup to satisfy Madge. Not that she would notice, anyway. She was the bride today, she shouldn't be worrying about anything else! She grabbed her nice shoes since her hunting boots didn't really go with the dress, and headed to the Seam.

* * *

As she made her way up the path, she could see Prim on the front porch, talking with Posy, Rory, and Gale.

"Katniss," Posy shrieked and threw her arms around her. Katniss laughed as she embraced the girl and glanced over her shoulder.

"How's it going, Gale?"

"Where's your husband, Catnip?"

"I'm a big girl, Gale. I can go places without Peeta, you know." Gale smirked and Katniss narrowed her eyes.

"Katniss, that dress looks gorgeous on you," Prim gushed.

"Thanks little duck. Madge gave it to me. I was just coming to see if you wanted to come to her place to help with last minute plans?"

"Oh yes, I'd love to! Give me one moment to finish getting ready! Um, Rory, next week sounds great." She gave him a warm smile before running into the house.

"If you break her heart, Rory Hawthorne, I'll break every limb on your body." Rory gulped audibly.

"Easy there tiger," Gale chuckled. "Don't go threatening my brother now."

"Then make sure he doesn't hurt my sister."

"I would never hurt her, Katniss," Rory assured her before Gale could speak again. "That I can promise you."

"Then I'm happy for you both," she nodded.

"Kat, you look so pretty," Posy said as she bounced up and down.

"Thank you, Posy! I like your dress too! Are you coming to the toasting?"

"I thought we could stop by for a few minutes," Rory glanced sideways at Gale. "Madge has always been really nice to us."

"As I said, you guys have fun. I don't really need to go to a Merchant's or a Peacekeeper's wedding."

"For god sakes, Gale, grow up," Katniss rolled her eyes.

"Hey. Some of us remember our places."

"Oh that was subtle, Hawthorne, really subtle," she snapped. "And just because Madge didn't let you jump into her pants doesn't mean you can't go give her your best wishes on her wedding day." Gale's face reddened while Rory hid his face in his hands to keep from laughing.

"And who says she didn't? Not all of us are prudes, Katniss." Her eyes glittered as she took a step towards him. He towered over her but she lifted her chin and glared.

"You don't know me, Gale. You haven't for a long time. So you don't know what I have and haven't done." He lowered his chin and gave her a cruel smirk.

"Fantastic. You've whored yourself out to a Peacekeeper. Congratulations." Her palm left a red print on his cheek and he blinked in surprise.

"I think you should go home," she said in a deadly whisper while Rory and Posy looked on in shock. Gale moved closer so that they were almost pressed together.

"There is something different about you, Katniss," his voice was so low that only she could hear. "I can see it in your flushed cheeks. I can smell it. You smell divine, actually. You let him touch you? Do you cry out his name? I can't imagine a Merchant baker's boy knows anything about making a woman cum. I used to imagine you crying out my name, Katniss. I could make you cum harder than you've ever-"

"Go to hell, Gale," she balled her fist and punched him square in the nose. His hands flew to his face and his eyes widened.

"Are you out of your fucking mind?"

"No but you must be! You're aware Peeta can have you flogged in the square? Did you forget that was your sentence and he saved you from it? And now you're whispering all of these disgusting things in my ear? Get the hell off my porch! I don't want to see you over here again."

"Katniss!" Prim came rushing out, her wide eyes moving from Gale to her sister. "What is going on?"

"Gale was just leaving."

"S'far as I'm concerned, you two were made for each other," Gale snarled as he jumped off the porch.

"Yes, I think you're right," she called after him. "He's mine and I'm his. Anything else is unthinkable."

"Whatever." Gale marched off back toward his house and Rory gaped at Katniss.

"Not that I condone you giving my brother a black eye but that was pretty awesome."

"Rory," Prim shrieked. "Don't encourage her!"

"He deserved it," he shrugged. "I heard only part of what he said and think he deserved a lot more. He would have gotten the shit beaten out of him if Peeta had heard that."

"I'm sorry, Posy," Katniss looked uncomfortable, realizing the little girl was still present. "Your brother can be a real jerk."

"It's ok, Katniss," Posy said uncertainly, staring at her brother's retreating back. "Gale's a jerkface. Especially lately. I'm happy you like Mr. Peeta so much."

"I'm surprised he said those things in front of Posy," Rory said quietly. "He's usually much better than that."

"He's changing, Rory," Katniss shook her head. "I hardly recognize him anymore."

"It's cause of Mama, isn't it," Posy turned to face her brother. Rory bit his lip and Prim slipped her hand into his.

"Gale's just worried about all of us, Pose," he said gently. "Mama will be ok." Prim's worried face told Katniss that Hazelle's health was worse than she'd thought.

"Prim, is Mom home?"

"She was mixing together some medicines."

"Ok. I'll be back in a minute and then we can go." She pushed the door open and peered around the corner. Violet was sitting at the table, hand mixing herbs.

"Hey sweetheart, do you need more herbs for Peeta?"

"No, he's doing alright. I was actually hoping you could do something to my hair before the toasting. Madge's hair always looks so pretty."

"Oh I think I can come up with something," she smiled and rose to her feet. "Sit down."

It was strange, she thought, sitting there with her mother fixing her hair. She imagined her doing this when she was a little girl, still giddy enough to let her mother comb out her long tresses. She found that she liked the feeling.

Violet finished the braid and pinned it to her head.

"I think I have something that would make this look even more beautiful. Wait here." She returned quickly with a fake yellow rose and she pinned it to her braid.

"Your father brought that to me the week before he died. He was upset that he couldn't find a real one but I told him this was beautiful. A yellow rose means joy and warmth. You're exuding warmth in that dress, my dear. It looks lovely on you."

"Thank you, Mom. And thanks for helping Peeta last night. I hate seeing him in pain."

"You didn't really tell me what happened. Just that he got hurt."

"It's… it's a long story. We were attacked by some of Peeta's soldiers."

"What?"

"They've been punished. But I'm still worried that it was the Head Peacekeeper who planned it, even though Peeta says it wasn't. I don't trust him at all."

"You've never really trusted peacekeepers before, Katniss."

"That's not true. I like Darius. And I sold meat to Cray. Some of the Peacekeepers are my best customers. Which is what might be getting me into trouble now."

She quickly told her mother about Jacobson and what he had told Thread. Her mother turned pale and when Katniss was finished talking, she sniffled and covered her face in her hands.

"Katniss, I have never done right by you! It's my fault you're in this mess. You should never have had to go into those woods! You wouldn't have if I had just been a mother to you both."

"Mom!" Katniss moved toward her mother, feeling slightly awkward. She didn't consider herself an expert at offering comfort. She wrapped her arms around her mother and patted her back softly.

"It's ok, Mom. It's ok."

"It's not, Katniss. You grew up way too fast because you had to. You took care of us. And you got married to save Prim! What kind of mother lets her child risk her

life and sell herself?"

"Mom...please stop. You know that Peeta is a good man. Please don't put it that way-"

"Are you happy, Katniss? With him? I mean truly happy?"

"I think so," she said slowly. "I mean, I don't think I really know what real happiness means… we have lived in these conditions for so long, is anyone really happy in 12?"

"I see you smile around him, like I've never seen you smile before. I see his love for you all over his face. You make him happy. I think you make each other happy."

"Yeah. I think we do. So yes, I guess I am happy."

"I'm sorry, sweetheart," she cupped Katniss's face and sniffed. "You deserve much more than this life."

"Well, maybe one day it will be a different life. A different world," she shrugged as her mother stared at her with wide eyes. "Who knows? I need to get going. Thank you for doing my hair."

"Have fun and give Madge my best."

"You know...you could come with us...if you want." Violet opened and closed her mouth uncertainly.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah. You know the Undersees. You said you were even friends once."

"Yes," she said, slightly dazed.

"Then come with us. We can wait while you change." Violet glanced down at her dress and nodded.

"Alright. Give me a moment."

* * *

Katniss returned the porch and Prim's brow raised.

"You ready?"

"Actually Mom is going to come with us."

"Really?" Katniss nodded and Prim broke into a smile. Rory was sitting with Posy on the porch steps, the two of them giggling softly.

"We should take Hazelle's medicine to her after the toasting," Prim lowered her voice.

"Is she not doing well?" Her sister shook her head sadly.

"Mom says it's cancer. Her children don't know."

"Gale?"

"He suspects but he doesn't know. Hazelle doesn't want them to know. I don't think there's any more that Mom can do. The medicine just helps with the pain." Katniss swallowed heavily. Hazelle had always been like a second mother to her and no matter how she was feeling about Gale at the moment, the Hawthornes were family.

"Maybe we can get some kind of medicine from the Capitol. Something stronger."

"I don't think it will help, Katniss, but we can try. Hey Mama, you look beautiful!" Violet had donned a lilac gown with her blonde hair scooped up. She smiled and cupped her youngest daughter's chin.

"Both of my girls look so beautiful and grown up. Hello Rory. Posy, how are you sweetheart?"

"Hi Auntie Violet," Posy hugged Violet around the middle and Rory jumped to his feet, brushing his pants off.

"The toasting doesn't start for another few hours but I'm sure the Undersees won't mind extra hands to help out."

"Well, I have no idea how to get to the Merchant side of town so lead the way, Katniss," Rory offered Prim his arm and offered Posy the other. Violet walked ahead of them, as if she had walked this path a thousand times. Katniss supposed she had been to the Mayor's house many times in the past. Especially if she was friends with Mrs. Undersee.

* * *

When they arrived and offered to help, Mayor Undersee looked like he would cry from relief.

"You all are too sweet. Miss Hawthorne, I need someone to put these treats on the table. Would you help me with that?"

"Yes sir," she reached for the bowl of candy and he leaned in closer.

"And I'll look the other way if you sneak one or two." He winked and Posy giggled.

"Mr. Hawthorne, could you help me with these tables? We need to move them outside."

"Of course sir."

"Girls, Madge and Saramae are upstairs, if you would like to go up and help. I think Saramae is doing her hair." Violet nodded and Katniss and Prim followed her up the stairs.

Madge sat at her vanity while her mother stood behind her. She caught sight of them in the mirror and jumped to her feet.

"Katniss! Primrose! Thank goodness you girls are here! Tell Mama to leave my hair down!"

"It will look so pretty up and off your neck," her mother said gently. Madge scowled and shook her head.

"Katniss wore hers down for her wedding!"

"Do you have any small flowers we can put in her hair," Violet asked softly.

"I think I may have some things in a box somewhere. I'll be right back." Saramae swept out of the room and Katniss grinned at Madge in the mirror.

"You look beautiful, Madge."

"So do you! That dress fits you like a dream! Wait until Peeta sees you in it! It's his favorite color you know." She gave her a knowing wink and Katniss rocked on her heels, loving the way the material felt against her legs. She hadn't forgotten that Peeta had a love for the muted sunset that she was clad in. She secretly couldn't wait to see what he thought. The dress was a mixture of the soft orange with yellows and reds swirled in, and Madge was right, it did fit her well.

Saramae returned with several blue flowers and Madge squealed.

"Those are beautiful, Mama! Where did they come from?"

"They belonged to your aunt." Violet's hand stilled and she swallowed deeply. Saramae sighed and wrapped her finger around one of Madge's curls.

"She would love to be here, Madge. To see you like this."

"You look so much like her," Violet said quietly.

"You knew my Aunt Maysilee?" Madge looked surprised.

"She was my best friend," Violet nodded. Prim's brow furrowed.

"What happened to her?" Neither woman answered and Madge shifted uncomfortably.

"Here, Madge. I want you to have your aunt's pin for good luck." She pinned a small gold pin onto Madge's bouquet and Madge studied it closely.

"What is that?"

"That's a mockingjay," Katniss said immediately. "That's beautiful, Mrs. Undersee." Saramae nodded, her lips thin.

"You're about ready, my girl."

"I'm nervous," Madge admitted, chewing her lip. "What if I don't make a good wife?"

"Madge if anyone should be worried about that, it's me. And we all know Rye adores you."

"Peeta has worshipped the ground you walk on since we were kids," Madge rolled her eyes. "But Rye and Peeta are different. What if I do something stupid? Something to upset him?"

"That's marriage, Madge," Violet laughed softly. "Nobody is flawless and no marriage is perfect. You and Ryen are young, so you can learn together."

"Do you love him," Prim asked with a gentle smile. Madge studied her reflection for a moment.

"Yes," she finally said. "I had a bit of a crush on him when we were younger. And I was devastated when I thought something had happened to him. He… he makes me really happy."

"Then that's all that matters," Katniss said, adjusting Madge's sleeve. "So I think you're ready."

"Ok," Madge nodded and stood. Katniss handed her the bouquet and Prim clapped softly.

"After this, we'll be sisters," Madge squeezed Katniss's hand and Katniss squeezed back.

* * *

When they came downstairs, the room was full of people. Katniss spotted Peeta standing beside his brother, so she hugged Madge tightly before walking over to him. His eyes widened and traveled up and down her frame.

"Wow."

"That's what you said at our toasting," she laughed as he leaned in to kiss her cheek.

"You...you're...Katniss, you're as radiant as the sun."

"I hoped you would like it."

"I'm afraid you might outshine the bride," he laughed softly in her ear. But Ryen's eyes were locked on his betrothed, who was coming down the staircase, her arm wrapped around her father's. Katniss leaned back against her husband, whose arms wrapped around her waist and held her close. They watched Madge and the Mayor cross the room to Ryen, who looked quite speechless. Katniss saw Bing and April standing next to Mr. and Mrs. Mellark, who both wore happy smiles. Katniss tried not to feel angry that his mother had attended one son's wedding but refused to attend another.

Whatever, she decided. I don't care about her opinion.

Bran Mellark stepped forward with a covered plate and Ryen carefully unwrapped the bread. He and Madge knelt next to the fireplace and he took her hand. They recited their vows, their voices shaking slightly, and toasted their bread. The room erupted into cheers as they fed each other and kissed. Ryen helped his wife up, looking around with a broad smile. Madge turned to Katniss and beckoned her forward.

"Everyone, my new sister has graciously agreed to gift us with her voice on my wedding day." She nodded to Katniss, her wide smile lighting up her face. Katniss took a deep breath and her eyes landed on Peeta. His eyes were brighter than any star she had ever seen.

 _My darling come to me, set you down easily_

 _and rest awhile by the soft firelight...cold is the night_

 _but warm is my heart with pride_

 _having you by my side_

 _you're still my guiding light_

 _After All These Years_

One of the musicians near the back of the room picked up his guitar as Katniss's sweet melody flowed around the room. Peeta's wide eyes never left her face. The music swelled and Katniss closed her eyes, lost in the song.

 _Your soft assuring ways, the rock I lean on_

 _saw me through my darkest days_

 _when all hope had gone_

 _you're still the only one, I'll ever hold near_

 _and I love you_

 _after all these years_

 _Time from me passes on, and I'm growing old_

 _a lifetime nearly gone, I cannot unfold...nights dark and cold_

 _but warm is your hand in mine, feeble with ageless time_

 _the light of love still shine_

 _After All These Years_

When she finished, everyone in the room cheered. Some even wiped tears from their face and Madge threw her arms around her.

"That was so beautiful," she cried in her ear. She smiled and patted Madge's and Rye's joined hands.

"I'm happy for you both."

"Thank you for that, Katniss," Ryen said gratefully. "That was really something." Katniss smiled and rejoined her husband.

"I can't even begin to express how incredible that was." She smiled and buried her face in his neck.

* * *

The crowd moved out of the house and into the Mayor's backyard. There were tables and chairs set up with a row of lights overhead. The musicians gathered together in a circle and played lively music. Katniss laughed as she danced with Prim and Madge, feeling Peeta's eyes on her the whole time. He stood with his brothers, all of them sipping champagne and watching their wives dance. Bing whispered something to Ryen and they both laughed but Peeta's eyes were locked on Katniss's swaying form. When the music slowed, she tugged on his hand.

"Come dance with me."

"I'm not miraculously a better dancer since our wedding."

"You aren't bad. Besides, this is a slow song. Just hold me." She tucked herself into his chest and he rested his chin on her hair. His hand rested on her lower back, his fingers itching to slide up her smooth dress and touch even smoother skin.

That dress was doing something to him and having her pressed against him like this was not helping.

She turned around in his arms and wrapped his arm around her waist. She swayed slowly to the music, pressing her ass back against his groin. He groaned in her ear and rested his forehead against her shoulder.

"Katniss, you're killing me here."

"Payback for earlier."

"Oh is that how it's going to be?" His fingers dug into her hip as he thrust forward, teasing her in the most delicious way.

"You knew exactly what this dress would do to me," he whispered, his tongue raking along her ear.

"I hoped it would," she said with a shiver.

"Are you wet for me, Katniss?" She felt weak at the sound of his husky voice in her ear.

"Yes," she whined. He kissed her neck and sucked at her earlobe.

"You want my tongue buried inside you?" She nearly buckled against him. She had never envisioned Peeta as a dirty talker but her panties were soaked right now.

Good lord, who was this silver-tongued ruffian pressing his arousal into her as if he could make love to her through their clothes?

More importantly, who was this hussy who was growing wetter with each word he spoke, wishing he would carry her away and make good on his promises?

"Yes," she said again. "I do." He groaned against her neck, then tugged on her hand. No one said a word as they re-entered the house.

"Meet me upstairs," he muttered before asking someone, loudly, where the bathroom was. Peeta shot her a wink before heading up the stairs and Katniss glanced all around. No one paid her any mind as she tiptoed up the stairs.

A hand shot out of the dark study and pulled her into the room. As soon as he had closed the door as quietly as he could, he turned and pushed her against the door. He had never been this rough before and she should be quite alarmed at this point, she thought to herself. His lips on her neck made all thoughts of reason vanish, however, and he palmed her breast through her dress.

"Peeta-" his finger on her lips made her eyes widen and he leaned down to kiss her, stealing her breath.

"You'll have to be quiet, Katniss, or we'll be caught. Think you can manage that?"

"Yes," she said with a scowl but gasped as she felt his hand slide under her dress. He smirked as he rubbed her through her panties.

"Really? I'm not sure you can."

"I'm a huntress," she snapped. "Of course I can be quiet."

"Alright then." He dropped to his knees and lifted her dress.

"Hold this out of my way." She gripped the material to her chest and watched him anxiously.

"Holy fuck," he muttered and she grinned, knowing he had noticed.

Madge had included something with the dress; a new pair of barely-there underwear. She had wanted to refuse at first (they were not practical in the slightest) but Madge's note had logically explained that it was a tight dress and women wore these panties to avoid lines. Not that she would ever care about such things, but she was curious to see Peeta's reaction.

Judging by the enormous bulge in his slacks, he approved of the gift.

Peeta looked up at her, his eyes darkened by lust. He didn't bother removing the panties; he simply pulled them aside as his tongue dove inside her. She released a high pitched wail as she grabbed his hair.

"Shh," he admonished without removing his face from between her thighs. It was not a time for teasing. Peeta knew they had limited time and he wanted his wife to cum hard on his tongue. He gripped both of her thighs before sliding his hand up her dress and tweaking her nipple.

"Oh! Oh my god Peeta," she panted, biting down on the dress and twisting it between her teeth.

"Cum for me, love," he growled, pushing two fingers inside her. She screamed into her dress and threw her head back against the wall.

"Shit Katniss, are you alright?" He jumped to his feet and cradled her head.

"I'm fine," she panted. "I can't move but I'm fine." He grinned as he leaned in to kiss her, his hardness poking her stomach.

"When we get home, I'm returning the favor in the shower." His eyes sparkled and he leaned in to kiss her again. The television flickered to life and made them jump apart. Katniss dropped her dress and Peeta took a step toward the desk.

"Hey, that's her!"

"That's who?"

"The woman I saw on the Mayor's screen last night. He was in here talking to someone on some kind of device and this came on… that's the same woman."

"You're certain?" Peeta frowned as he approached the TV. The woman was speaking in front of a dilapidated building but she looked calm and quite fierce. She raised her fist into the air and banners and signs waved all around her.

"We need to get out of here."

"But Peeta, what's-"

"Come on." He tugged her from the study and back downstairs. Prim and Madge both shot her knowing glances with upturned lips and Katniss imagined she looked like a mess. But Peeta did not release her hand until they were outside.

"Wait here a moment while I have a word with Darius."

"You're not going to tell me what's going on? Really?"

"Katniss-"

"I'm tired of the secrets, Peeta!"

"I know," he said gently. "I told you, I will tell you everything I can. Just...just let me figure out what is going on." He gently cupped her face and she resisted from jerking away.

"I don't like keeping secrets from you," he whispered. "Not you. But I'll also do anything to keep you safe."

"Including keeping things from me?"

"You can hate me for it," he said sadly, nodding. "But even keeping things from you. I just need you to trust me. Can you do that?" She sighed heavily and crossed her arms. She wanted to say no, that he hadn't given her any reason to trust him.

But that was a lie. In fact, everything he had done, he had done for her. Who could she trust if not Peeta?

"Fine," she sighed reluctantly. He gave her a quick kiss on the temple.

"Stay near Madge or your family. I'll be right back." He rushed off to find Darius and Katniss wandered over to where Madge was giggling with Prim. They truly looked like sisters, with their blonde hair, their azure eyes, and their matching smiles. Even her mother looked like she was enjoying herself, laughing with Bran Mellark (Katniss had no idea where Mrs. Mellark had disappeared to)

"Katty," Prim waved her sister over and squeezed her hand.

"Katniss, I can't thank you enough for all of your help this week," Madge said, taking Katniss's other hand.

"I didn't really do anything."

"But you did! You kept me sane!"

"Do you need any help moving your things to Ryen's house," Prim asked excitedly.

"Oh all three Mellark boys said they would help tomorrow morning. Although Ryen mentioned that Peeta shouldn't be doing any heavy lifting. Did something happen to him, Katniss?" Katniss glanced over at Peeta, who was in conversation with Rye, and cleared her throat. Prim was watching her warily. The make-up had done its job, hiding his bruises but whoever looked close enough could see his slight limp and his pained wince. She knew, however, that he was staying strong and didn't want everyone to know. So she shook her head.

"I think he might have pulled a muscle or something at work. He didn't say anything to me about it."

"Oh, I hope he's ok," Madge bit her lip. "He looks fine to me but he could be faking it. You know how boys are."

"Yeah. I can see all of the Mellark boys being bad about that."

"Ryen was ridiculous about it when we were younger. Then again, so was Peeta. He was the one who always lied about his bruises." Katniss frowned.

"You knew what was really happening?"

"I suspected," she said sadly. "I knew his mother wasn't a pleasant woman, though I never actually saw her hit him. He used to say it was from his wrestling matches. Delly and I talked about it one time and she said she thought his mother was doing it."

"Why did no one say anything? Why didn't anyone do anything about it?"

"I don't know, Katniss," Madge looked guilty. "I guess we were just scared little girls. And Delly had never actually seen it happen either." Katniss had. She remembered that day with the bread, how he had appeared out in the rain with a red weal on his face and two loaves of burned bread in his arms. The day after, his face had swollen and his eye was blackened. She hadn't said anything either.

But Delly and Madge were Merchants, she reasoned, and had been his friends. Someone should have done something.

"He probably would have lied about it anyway," she sighed, shaking her head. "One thing I have learned about Peeta is that he hates to inconvenience people in any way. He's far too forgiving."

"He has such a sweet heart," Madge nodded in agreement. "You two really do make a wonderful couple. And I'm not just saying that because he's my friend, or that I married his brother. I can see how happy you make each other." Prim nodded in agreement and Katniss's eyes drifted back to her husband. He and Rye were talking to Darius, and serious looks had covered their faces. Peeta was shaking his head and Darius seemed to be trying to convince him of something. Katniss hated the look on Peeta's face. She knew he was in pain but he was also worried about something. Who was that woman on the Mayor's screen? What was going on with Darius and Ryen? WHEN would her husband tell her what he knew?

"Katniss?"

"Hm? Sorry," she turned toward Madge and attempted a smile. "I was dozing off, what did you say?"

"Can't keep your eyes off of him, huh," her friend laughed.

"No. I mean, I…"

"Katniss, it's ok," Madge squeezed her arm. "Seriously, why do you think it's such a bad thing to let people know you're in love with him?"

"I'm not in love," she said quickly, taking a step back. Madge and Prim frowned and she shook her head. "That is...I like him. A lot. I mean, he means a lot to me. But love...it's complicated and it's a scary thing and I...I don't…" she huffed and tossed her head. "You said it yourself, Madge. You said love is a fairytale."

"What? When did I say that?"

"At Darius's and Rosalie's wedding! You said love is a fairytale and not to buy into it."

"Oh Katniss. Our husbands essentially returned from the dead! Do you really think those rules still apply?"

"Why do the circumstances change?"

"They just do," Madge said impatiently. "You can deny it all you want but I know that you love him. I'm not saying in what way, I mean, maybe you don't know yourself. But anyone paying attention can see how much you care about him."

"She's right, Katty," Prim said softly. "You light up when he walks into the room. Why are you trying to talk yourself out of it?"

"I'm not talking myself out of anything, duck, I'm just saying that feelings are complicated and love is especially complicated-"

"It doesn't seem that complicated," her sister cut her off, shaking her head. "Peeta makes you laugh. You make him blush. You make each other glow. That seems pretty straightforward to me."

"What makes you think you know anything about love, Prim," she snapped. Prim didn't look affronted, just merely irritated.

"I'm sixteen, Katniss. You need to stop viewing me as a baby." Katniss huffed and shook her head, and Madge leaned against the wall, sighing.

"I won't tell you how you feel, Katniss. Only you know your heart. Just...be honest. With Peeta and with yourself. Don't try to brush off your feelings because you're afraid of being hurt. That's the risk with falling in love." Katniss didn't know what to say. So she muttered that she was thirsty and headed off toward the refreshment table. Prim sighed heavily as she watched her sister's retreating back.

"She's so stubborn."

"Why is she like that, Prim?"

"I think it has something to do with Daddy's death," she said thoughtfully. "She doesn't want to be like Mom. If something happens to Peeta, she doesn't want to fall apart like our mother did when Daddy died. She was a mess and completely unable to take care of herself. Katniss took care of us and she was only 11. She doesn't want history to repeat itself."

"I just hope she sees what she has in front of her before it's too late. She and Peeta are both too stubborn for their own good and they need to stop dismissing their own feelings. They'll wind up driving each other away."

"I heard Peeta talking to my mom last night. He doesn't believe she really loves him." Madge clicked her tongue and shook her head.

"Why would he? If she hasn't admitted it to herself, how would Peeta know how she feels for him?"

"Well Mom tried to tell him but he says if she does feel something for him, it's because of what he's done for her. And he doesn't want that."

"I can understand that," Madge nodded. "He wants it to be real. And he's afraid it never will be."

"The thing is, Katniss has never put her happiness first. She wants everyone else to be safe and happy and she will do anything to make that happen."

"Peeta is the same way," Madge said softly. "When we were kids, Peeta always gave away his lunch if he thought someone else needed it. Which is hard when you're growing up in an impoverished district."

"So how can we make them admit to each other that they really do need each other?"

"I don't think it's something we can do, Prim. I think it's something they have to realize on their own. Let's just hope they figure it out soon. From the looks on the boys' faces, I feel like something big is about to happen. And I have a feeling Peeta is going to be a big part of it. We just have to wait and see if that's a good thing or a bad thing."

* * *

 _ **Here's a nice long one for you guys! You can tell that trouble is brewing... what do you think of Jacobson's punishment? Agree or disagree with it? We will be heading to the Capitol very soon, so get ready! Have a great week, everyone! XOXOXO**_


	24. Chapter 24

Peeta came to find her not long after and asked her if she was ready to go home. Madge and Ryen were dancing and looked lost in their own little world, so she agreed and they said their goodbyes.

"Can we escort you ladies home, Violet?"

"Your father was kind enough to offer, Peeta," Katniss's mother blushed and glanced over to where Bran was laughing with Bing. April had gone home already, complaining that the baby was making her ill and Mrs. Mellark had complained of a headache early in the evening. Peeta's brow raised and Violet cleared her throat.

"Your father thinks it's a good idea for you to go on home and rest. And he asked me for some salve for that burn on his hand. So I agreed to let him escort us home. Don't worry about us." Peeta's eyes shifted back and forth from his mother-in-law to his father and he finally nodded.

"Right. Well have a pleasant evening, ladies."

"Night Peeta," Prim said cheerfully as she hugged her sister. "Night Katty." Bran came over to them and smiled.

"Are you ladies ready?" Katniss stared at the three of them, feeling something begin to gnaw at her, that she just couldn't shake away.

"Peet, I already told Violet I would walk with her and Prim. You get Katniss home safely."

"Ok Pops," he nodded. "I'll just give my best wishes to the bride and groom before we leave." He walked over to Madge and Ryen and Katniss suddenly felt

uncomfortable, standing next to her mother and sister and father-in-law. Almost like an outsider.

How strange.

"Katniss, you sang so beautifully tonight," Bran continued to smile, unaware of her discomfort.

"Thank you," she attempted a smile. "My dad taught me to sing."

"Ah I remember. The birds even stopped to listen to your father when he sang." Katniss's eyes flicked to her mother.

"Yeah, that's what people say." Violet swallowed and stared at the floor.

"Well, we should be going. Good night, Katniss," Bran said with a nod and a smile. Katniss watched him offer his arm to her mother and Prim, as Peeta had done with Prim and her. She shook her head and joined Peeta, Madge, and Ryen. After multiple embraces and thank you's, Peeta offered his arm and lead her through the district.

* * *

His eyes wandered to the stars as they walked, his hand squeezing hers tightly. She wondered if it was because it was his brother's wedding day or because Jacobson was no longer a threat, but she noticed that he wasn't hurrying home as he normally did once the sun had gone down.

"The stars are quite stunning tonight."

"Yeah. Your mom left kind of early," she finally said, glancing up at him. He shrugged, his eyes still cast upward.

"She usually complains that her head is hurting most evenings. It's not as if she's the life of the party, anyway."

"But your dad didn't want to stay with her and make sure she was feeling alright?" He tore his eyes away from the sky and frowned down at her.

"What?"

"I just mean, he stayed around for the rest of the reception. Don't you think your mom would have wanted him to stay at home with her?"

"Not really. She likes to be alone when her headaches come on."

"Oh."

"Katniss, what's going on?"

"Nothing," she shrugged and his brow quirked. They were almost to their house when she spoke again.

"Are you not worried about them breaking curfew? Maybe you should have escorted them after all."

"Parents of the newlyweds have permission to stay out later, on the day of the wedding. They'll be just fine, love. Do you want me to call and check?"

"We don't have phones in the Seam."

"I can call the bakery and speak with Dad."

"No, then you would wake your mother up. I'm sure you're right and they're fine." Peeta watched her in bemusement as he pushed the door open and she headed toward the bedroom.

"Katniss," he said slowly as she reached back to unzip her dress.

"Hm?"

"Does it bother you to see my dad and your mom together?" She whirled around to face him, her eyes wide in surprise. He was leaning against the door, his arms

crossed over his chest and a knowing look on his face.

"Of course not."

"I think you're lying to me," he pushed off the door and approached her slowly, taking her hand. "I think it bothered you a lot."

"You said yourself his feelings for her are still the same," she said defensively. His brow furrowed slightly.

"What?"

"I heard you...talking to my mom." His eyes widened and he went slightly pale. But he shook his head and took a step forward.

"You know nothing will happen. He's married and your mother won't dishonor your father's memory like that."

"You think if your dad's feelings are still there, my mom's aren't?"

"So what if they aren't? They won't act on it. Do you think Madge is completely over Gale? I can hear the disappointment in her voice when she talks about him. I

don't think he's ever left her heart either."

"So what are you saying, that someone can be in love with more than one person? That people can be disloyal to their spouses?"

"I think people can still feel strong feelings after so many years but it doesn't mean they will do something about it. Some of us can repress those feelings for a lifetime, it seems, and have no intentions to act on them. We might feel it's just better that way. I just mean...I think there is enough room in someone's heart for multiple people. That's all."

"Why would it be better that way?"

"For a number of reasons," he shrugged. "It just might not be in both peoples' best interests to disrupt their lives for something that might not ever happen anyway."

"It depends on the circumstances, don't you think?"

"How so?" She stepped toward him and played with the button on his shirt.

"Well, your dad, for example, might not have ever gotten over my mom. But he seems to have had a good life with your mother and certainly got some good things over the and your brothers, for example."

"Yeah," he nodded, swallowing thickly as her fingers slipped the button from its hole. "And he loves Mom. She loves him too, in her own ways."

"And my mom...she may still have strong feelings toward Bran, but she had a loving marriage with my dad...she was really happy for awhile."

"Of-of course," he stammered as she trailed her fingertips across his chest.

"But say there is a boy who spends years in unrequited love, simply because he won't say anything, until one day, he's forced to speak up. And his pain is almost

pointless because that girl he has been pining for might have felt just as deeply for him as he felt for her," he sucked in a breath as he realized she had slipped the last button from its hole and her palms pressed to his bare chest.

"But because he repressed his feelings for so long, because he had no intentions, as you say, he could have deprived them both of happiness. He never gave her a chance to say what she's really been feeling." Her fingers on his chest paused and his trembling hand covered hers.

"Well, what if he gave her the chance? What would she say?" Katniss gazed up into his eyes as she chewed her lip.

"She might tell him…" His eyes bore into hers, his thumbs making gentle patterns over her hand.

"What, Katniss?" His hand moved up to her cheek, his knuckles grazing her skin and making her shiver.

"Does it really matter at this point?" He cupped her chin and leaned in to nuzzle her cheek. He lowered his lips to her ear.

"What would that girl say?"

"She might tell him... that he makes her heart race, no matter how much she tries to hide it." She released a squeak as his tongue raked along the fleshy edge of her ear. His other hand released hers and moved around to her backside. He palmed her ass, squeezing with one large hand.

"Mmhm. What else?"

"She might tell him that she knows things about him. That... she was watching him, even when he didn't think she noticed him." He reached back and fingered the zipper of her dress, which was halfway down her back. He moved to the side, his lips meeting her bare shoulder and following each piece of flesh that was bared to him. When the zipper could go no lower, he lowered to his knees and kissed the base of her spine. Her breathing hitched and he reached for her sleeve, tugging gently until the dress fell around her ankles. He kissed her right cheek, then her left before spinning her around to face him. She gasped at the look in his eyes as he gazed up at her, his fair curls tickling her stomach and the way his tongue traveled over his lips distracted her to no end.

"Anything else?"

"What," she said faintly, her mind clearly elsewhere. He was driving her to madness.

He rested his chin on her belly and smiled.

"The girl," he said softly. "Would she tell the boy anything else?"

"That she would be lost without him," she fingered his hair and he closed his eyes. "And that despite the fact that she's quite afraid of these feelings… he has found a way into her heart. To a place where no one else has ever been. And he's not going anywhere anytime soon."

"Indeed not," he kissed her stomach and his hands rested on her hips. "I'm going to stay right here and cause all kinds of trouble." Before she could speak again, he pulled her scant panties down her legs and tossed them over his shoulder. He gripped her hips and lifted her up until he was standing with his mouth buried between her thighs and her legs draped over his strong shoulders. She screamed as his tongue thrust inside her and she tried to focus on the incredible sensations rather than how high in the air she was at the moment. His arms didn't even shake as he held her writhing form still, one of his hands moving up to grasp her breast. Her palms were flat on the wall and her legs tightened around his head. She whimpered, her teeth digging into her lip.

"Nobody here but us, my love. Scream for me. I want to hear you."

"Oh Peeta. Oh my god!"

"Louder."

"PEETA!" She screamed his name to the ceiling and gripped his hair tightly as he brought her over the edge. He gently lay her on the bed and moved back but she grabbed the waistband of his slacks and tugged him forward.

"You've done that for me twice now. I need to repay the favor."

"There's no repayment, Katniss," he said softly, his hand covering hers. "I love doing that for you. It's not a chore for me. So don't feel obligated to do anything in return. That's not how this works."

"You know I'm not good at saying things," she sat up and gripped the sides of his slacks. "But I want you to stand up and take these off." He bit his lip but backed off of the bed and used his thumbs to push the pants down his legs.

"Slower," she said, moving forward on her hands and knees. "I want to enjoy this. Go slower."

"What's going through your head," he asked softly. But instead of waiting for a reply, he did as she asked and slowed his movements , baring only a bit of flesh at a time. When he had his slacks around his ankles, he kicked his shoes off and moved the pants to the side. He wore the tight underwear that she had seen and admired several nights ago, and she could clearly see how aroused he was. When he didn't move to remove them, she nodded.

"These too." He swallowed and hooked his thumbs in the material. As he started to push them down, her hands darted out to push his aside. She glanced up at him, her heart catching when she saw how his eyes dazzled in the moonlight. She lowered her eyes to his chest and she leaned forward to kiss his pectoral. His head tilted back as he released a small sigh. Every stifled moan he made echoed in the empty room as she trailed soft kisses across his chest and stomach. She eased his underwear down bit by bit until she reached his pelvis, pulling them out and down so his cock peeked over the material. His breathing became labored as she licked the tip before pulling his underwear down his legs and allowing him to step out of them and kick them aside. His hands twitched at his sides but he made no move to touch her. She cupped his sac in her palm before moving up to stroke his length.

"God Katniss," he moaned to the ceiling. She bathed him in her adoration, her hand following her tongue and making sure he was slick under her palm. His knees shook but he couldn't move. She closed her lips around him and sucked, making him cry out and his head jerked up. He suddenly pushed her backwards, covering her body with his and kissing her with all his might. She fell back onto the bed and wrapped her arms around his neck, their tongues dancing together in the most glorious dance. The way his bare skin pressed against hers made her whine, her nipples crushed against his muscular chest.

"I don't know what you're doing to me," he muttered against her lips before moving down to kiss her throat. "You transform me into something else entirely. You make all of my judgement just vanish completely."

"You talk too much," she gasped as he sucked her nipple into his mouth. He chuckled around her breast and nodded.

"Yeah, that's probably true." She had an idea of how to silence him. She sat up and pressed her lips to his, moving to her hands and knees and causing him to fall back against the pillows. She moved between his legs and rubbed her belly over his throbbing arousal. When she moved her leg over his, their centers aligned and both of them gasped in pleasurable delight. She rubbed against him, causing him to hiss at the feel of her wet folds against his sensitive skin. She could easily slide down on top of him and take him inside her.

"Katniss!"

His hands flew to her hips and she ceased her movements. She looked up at him and saw his flushed face was covered in vulnerability and fear. Whether it was fear of rejection, fear of the act itself, or something else entirely, she didn't know. She moved down to kiss him, to assure him, and her hand closed around his cock. She moved her hand up and down as quickly as she could, tightening her grip and drawing out his guttural moans. He tried to lift his hand, presumably to cup her breast or touch her between her legs but she was determined to have one minute where he wasn't making it about her. Where he could selfishly enjoy her attention and not worry about anything but himself and how she was making him feel.

So she held him down by the wrist and captured his lip with her teeth. He grunted and groaned loudly as his hips jerked and she felt something warm and sticky cover her hand and her stomach. His head fell backwards as his entire body trembled with the aftereffects of his release. She leaned down to kiss him and he released a tiny whimper, something most men would be too afraid to let a woman hear. But Peeta reached for the back of her head, pulling her in for a rough kiss, not caring about something so insignificant as breathing. When they broke apart, he pressed his forehead to hers, doing everything he could to remain connected with the woman his heart was racing for.

"Let me get you something to clean up with," he muttered shakily.

"I can get it." He tried to protest but she climbed off of him and went to the bathroom. Peeta ran his fingers through his hair, trying to catch his breath before she

returned. He stared at the ceiling, his hands gripping his hair and he willed his heart to slow down before it gave out.

* * *

She quickly washed her hands and brought him a warm cloth. He reached for it but she shook her head and gently wiped him clean before moving it to her stomach and wiping his cum from her skin. She tossed it toward their discarded clothes and she curled up into his side, propping her head on her hand and trailing a finger down his cheek.

"Holy shit," he sighed, his eyes fluttering closed. "I think you've killed me. Truly. I think I'm dead and an angel is touching me."

"Not even close," she snorted.

"You're right. That definitely was not angelic, what we just did. And you, my huntress, can still shock the hell out of me."

"I love seeing you that way," she confessed and he glanced up at her. "The way your eyes get so dark I can hardly see the blue. And the way your teeth dig into your lip," she gently stroked his lip with her fingertip. "Those sounds you make. It's all so...exhilarating."

"I know what you mean," he nodded. "I mean, I spent years dreaming about what you look like and sound like and...taste like. God that makes me sound like such a creep," he sat up and draped his arm around her shoulder, her cheek resting against his chest. "But, nothing could have prepared me for what it's like in real life.

What you're like. My dreams didn't do you justice."

"I'm nothing special, Peeta." He cupped her chin and leaned down to kiss her.

"I'm usually fairly good with words but even I can't summon of a word to properly describe how incredible you are." She flipped onto her stomach and rested her chin on his chest. His hands went to her hair and she closed her eyes. She now wondered, based on his reaction, if she was not the only one who wasn't quite ready to go all the way. Or was he just afraid that she wasn't?

"Katniss?"

"Mmhm?" He pulled his hand away and her eyes opened at the loss of his fingers in her hair.

"Will you sing for me?"

"Now?"

"It's just… when you sang earlier… I can't describe it. You seemed to take me away to a different time and place with your voice. It's pure magic. I just want to hear it again."

"Alright." She sat up and mentally went through the songs her father had taught her.

 _On one evening long ago when the sun was sinking low_

 _My true love went to sail upon the sea_

 _It was in the month of June when the roses were in bloom_

 _When he took me in his arms and said to me_

 _You're a flower blooming in the wildwood_

 _A flower blooming there for me_

 _Sweeter than the morning dew and I'll soon return to you_

 _You're a flower that is blooming there for me_

 _Then a letter came to me from a captain on the sea_

 _And it told me that my darling was dead_

 _Oh the shock and great surprise, made the teardrops in my eyes_

 _When I thought about the last words that he said_

 _Now he can't return to me, he got drowned in the sea_

 _And he's passed over life's weary way_

 _When it's in the month of June and the roses are in bloom_

 _It seems that I can hear my lover say_

 _You're a flower blooming in the wildwood_

 _A flower blooming there for me_

 _Sweeter than the morning dew and I'll soon return to you_

 _You're a flower that is blooming there for me."_

* * *

When she finished, he stared at her for so long she wondered if he was upset by the words. But he scooped her into his lap and kissed her forehead.

"That was heart wrenching," he muttered. "It was beautiful, don't get me wrong. You could probably sing the words to a Geology textbook and it would be captivating. But the lyrics are so sad."

"Dad didn't teach me very many happy songs. I guess I never stopped to question it before."

"Well thank you for the song. Your voice gives me strength." He closed his eyes and heaved a great sigh.

"Let's take a shower." Her brow furrowed. He looked like he was about to say something but then he suggested a shower.

"Ok," she shrugged and followed him to the bathroom. She felt a little awkward at walking around naked, but he didn't seem to think about it as he pulled the shower curtain aside and turned the water on. He grabbed a towel from the shelf and handed it to her and she cocked her head in confusion. He wrapped another one around his waist and motioned for them to sit down.

"This is the only way I can know for certain no one can hear us."

"What do you mean? Your house is bugged?"

"I don't think it is but I don't know for sure. The Mayor warned me that it might be." He took her hands and exhaled deeply.

"Katniss what I'm about to tell you has to stay here in this room. You can't even tell Prim, alright? She would be in a lot of danger if she knew anything."

"I understand," she nodded. He knew she would never do anything to put Prim's safety at risk.

"I'm not really sure where to begin," he scratched the back of his neck, looking uncertain.

"Just...tell me what's going on, Peeta."

"I'll try. A lot of it is pure speculation. And I'm still trying to figure out a lot of it myself. Something big is happening in Panem."

"You've said that before. What is happening?"

"Rebellion," he lowered his voice even more. "The districts are angry with the Capitol and are rising up. Snow is deploying more and more Peacekeepers to the districts to maintain order. That's why he has been kidnapping boys to put through the program. Rye and I were the only ones from an outlying district, other than Shuck, who came from 11. The boys usually came from 2, though some were brought from 4. A few from 7. Not many past that. And I say boys because that's what they...what we were. Kids taken from their homes to be turned into monsters," he took a deep breath and she cupped his cheek. Her touch seemed to give him strength to continue.

"Anyway, as I've already told you, I showed dedication to my training just to get back here to you. Duartyr liked me and said I showed real promise so he made sure more of the higher ups noticed me too. I still don't really understand why Snow noticed me, that part is still a mystery, although the Mayor has a few theories but he isn't sharing them with me right now. Most likely, though, it's just that I'm from 12."

"But did Snow ask to speak to Ryen?"

"No, he didn't," Peeta said, looking uncomfortable.

" Ok. So the Mayor is a part of the rebellion?"

"There are a few here in 12 who are...believers in the cause. And the Capitol would view it as rebellious activity. I wasn't aware of it completely until I started work. Darius convinced me to reach out to the leader and they asked if I would attend a meeting. It seems that they want me to be a spy when we travel to the Capitol."

"Does Thread know what they have asked you to do?" He shook his head.

"I don't know how he could. Jacobson didn't really know anything and was just speculating when he started naming names the other night."

"Yeah, he said Darius and Ryen were involved," she said thoughtfully. "Which, I guess, they are?"

"Ryen and I… let's just say our training was a bit out of the ordinary than the rest of the soldiers." He looked uncomfortable for a moment and rubbed his shoulder.

"We were treated differently because of where we came from. They tested us to see where our loyalties were. And I really… I don't want to go into it tonight. I promise I will tell you everything that happened, Katniss, but I just can't tonight." He shuddered and squeezed his eyes shut, as if he was fighting off bad memories. She reached out a tentative hand and caressed his cheek. His eyes shot open for a moment before they fluttered closed again and he nuzzled into her palm.

"So anyway," he cleared his throat, looking anxious. "Darius heard about our training and he thought we would be the most interested in hearing what… the District 12 leader had to say. He is trying to get me to go to their meetings."

"Who is the District 12 Leader?"

"I'm afraid I can't tell you just yet," he said softly. "Not because I don't want to! But because he asked me not to reveal his identity until we know it's safe." She huffed but she understood. Names were better left unsaid right now.

"Alright, fine. I have a feeling it's the Mayor anyway. So you haven't been to a meeting yet?"

"Until a few days ago, I wasn't even sure if I wanted any part in this. But with everything that has happened… Gale's arrest, Cray's murder, Jacobson's torture… I'm just so tired of it, Katniss. I don't like the way things are in Panem. I never have but as a soldier, I learned to supress my feelings toward it. Marrying you though… it's made me see how unfair things are and how terrible it is if we are just sitting around talking about doing something instead of actually doing it. You've made me realize that something needs to be done, for our future and...for future generations." Her eyes widened and he cleared his throat, looking everywhere but at her.

"I didn't," her voice came out as a squeak and she cleared her throat. "I didn't do anything, I mean, I haven't done anything to make you realize something."

"Hearing how you grew up," he said softly, pulling her hand to his chest. "I watched you, Katniss. I saw how skinny you were. I snuck you food, hoping it would help but it didn't. I was terrified that I would lose you. That day with the bread… I knew you were dying. I was afraid that you would die right there under our tree. That's why I took that beating. I would do whatever I could to help you. And it's not just you. Going with you to the Seam, I see the way people live. It's not right. It's not right that little Posy looks at food like she can't believe it's right in front of her. It's not right that we have to watch children fight to the death every year. Our way of life has grown much too cruel and we need to do something about it. That's why I told them I would join the rebellion."

"If anyone finds out, they will kill you for sure."

"This has been going on much longer than you think. The Mayor told me he attended meetings when he was just a boy."

"If it's been going on this long, why hasn't anything been done yet? Why has it taken so long?"

"It took our ancestors nearly twenty five years to get the first rebellion started, Katniss. And that war raged for almost ten years."

"And look how it ended! District 13 was destroyed and the Treaty of Treason was established. 12 districts serve the Capitol and are left to starve to death. What good did that ten year war do? What good is rebellion when nothing will change?"

"Maybe if it wasn't just twelve districts fighting against the Capitol," he said slowly, "the districts might stand a chance." Katniss frowned.

"There's no one left, Peeta. Didn't you pay attention in history class? The country fell into ruin, effectively destroying itself with war and disease and overpopulation-"

"And what was left of the country was divided into thirteen districts and a Capitol city," he finished for her. "Yes, I remember my lessons. What I'm saying is that if there was another district, one that specializes in nuclear weaponry, and they rose up… we might be able to defeat the Capitol this time."

"Are you saying what I think you're saying?" Peeta froze and his eyes widened. He jumped to his feet and turned the water off, before grabbing her hand and running down the hall. The banging on the door continued and they could hear muffled voices.

"Peeta," she said quietly, her eyes trained on the front door.

"Stay here."

"No way!"

"Katniss-"

"I'm not some damsel in distress, Peeta!"

"No but you are naked," he looked her up and down.

"So are you. So I hope if whoever is on the other side of that door is here to arrest us, they will give us a chance to put some clothes on." Peeta shook his head and grabbed his rifle from the hall. Katniss wished she had thought to grab her bow but she remained by his side as they approached the door.

"Peet," he heard muffled yelling.

"That sounds like Ryen," she said uncertainly.

"Peeta, please," another voice said, much higher and full of tears. Peeta yanked the door open and gasped. Ryen was supporting a nearly unconscious man, while a young woman with a tear-streaked face clung to his arm.

"He's lost a lot of blood!"

"Come inside." Peeta gestured them in and closed the door tightly behind them. Katniss noticed two things immediately: red hair and what looked to be a steady

river of blood.

"We need my mother."


	25. Chapter 25

"What happened," Peeta asked as Ryen half dragged Darius into the living room.

"His tongue has been cut out," he said in a low voice. Katniss clapped her hand over her mouth and Peeta looked sick. Rosie knelt next to her husband and cried into his shoulder.

"Whoever did it just left him on the front porch. Rosalie was the one who found him and I was walking past when I heard her screams. I told Madge to stay inside and I ran over to see what had happened. He's in bad shape, Peet. He's been beaten pretty bad and the cut isn't a clean one."

"Ok," Peeta was pale and clutched his stomach. "Katniss, we need to go get your mother."

"What about curfew," Ryen asked hesitantly.

"I'm First Lieutenant. Fuck the curfew. A fellow Peacekeeper has been assaulted and you're worried about-"

"Slow down, Peeta," Ryen frowned. "I'm not the enemy here." Peeta took several breaths and nodded.

"I'm sorry. I'm going to call Thread and inform him of what has happened. We need a Healer as soon as possible. Katniss, you might want to get dressed," she

pulled the towel tighter around her and blushed, glancing at Ryen. He blew out a breath and avoided her eyes.

"We were just about to take a shower," she mumbled. "Not WE, I mean, I was about to get in… Peeta was changing out of his wedding clothes…"

"We have bigger things to worry about, Katniss," Peeta muttered, nodding his head toward the living room.

"Right. Be right back." She hurried into the bedroom and slammed the door.

"Um, you might want to go do the same," Ryen glanced down at the towel wrapped around his brother's waist.

"Do me a favor and call some of the men. You know which ones. They need to know what happened."

"Anyone else?" He gave Peeta a pointed look and the Peacekeeper Lieutenant nodded.

"Call him first. Tell him what has happened. He will need to act fast." Peeta gripped the towel and rushed into the bedroom.

* * *

Katniss's head shot up as Peeta opened the door and he cleared his throat.

"Rye is making some calls but as soon as we dress, we need to go get your mom and sister. I'm afraid Darius is losing too much blood." She nodded as she buttoned her pants.

"That kind of injury is tricky and I won't be any help at all. I can't stand the sight of blood."

"There is a lot of it. More than when I...when Jacobson…" he trailed off and shook his head quickly, hurrying into the closet.

"Mom and Prim won't get in trouble, will they?"

"No, I will escort them and will explain everything to Thread. He needs to know what happened and most likely will want to come over to talk to Rosalie."

"Poor Rosie," she shook her head. "Maybe someone should stay here with her and make her some tea."

"Rye and I will go to your mother's house and you can watch over her and Darius."

"I'm coming with you, Peeta. Two Peackeepers knocking on my mom's door in the middle of the night might give her a heart attack." He looked like he wanted to protest but it was obvious he was shaken up. He finished dressing and rushed into the kitchen where Ryen was hanging up the phone.

"I need to call Thread."

"I just did. Told him you were already on your way over to the Everdeens'. He said he would meet you back here."

"Stay with Rosalie," he said quietly. "Make her some tea and try to calm her down. Katniss and I will be back soon."

"You sure you don't want me to come with you?" Ryen looked uncertain. His fears went unspoken but Peeta understood. They had thought the threat was gone when Jacobson was sent away but then who could have done this to Darius? Who would dare do this to a Peacekeeper? Ryen shook his head.

"I don't like you both going out there by yourselves. At least let me call some back up."

"Fine, but we are going now. Tell them to meet us at the Seam." Ryen nodded and picked up the phone again. Katniss was talking to Rosalie in a hushed tone, patting her back comfortingly.

"Katniss," he said softly and she squeezed Rosalie's hand before joining her husband at the door.

"We will be back with some help, Rosalie," Peeta nodded. "Ryen will stay with you. Stay inside and keep watch over him. We will be back as soon as we can." Rosalie nodded miserably, taking Darius's hand and kissing it. Peeta lead Katniss out of the house and gripped her hand tightly all the way to the Seam.

* * *

Purnia and an older Peacekeeper, a graying man they called Elias, were waiting for them at the end of the road. Purnia nodded to them, looking grim.

"Is he alright?"

"We need a Healer," was all Peeta said. Purnia swallowed and briskly turned on the road, leading the way to the Everdeen house.

Katniss knocked several times before the door opened and Violet's eyes widened as they swept over her daughter and the Peacekeepers.

"We need you and Prim to bring whatever you can for severe bleeding." Her mother flew into Healer mode once again and summoned Prim to her side. Peeta offered to carry the basket of supplies but Prim kept a firm grip. On their way back to the house, Katniss told them who the patient was and what was wrong.

"He can easily bleed to death from that kind of injury," Violet said worriedly. Purnia inhaled sharply.

"That's why we were in such a hurry to get to you," Peeta said gently. Violet nodded and picked up her pace, so that they were leaving Elias in the dust behind them.

Two Peacekeepers waited on Peeta's porch when they returned and nodded as they passed. Commander Thread stood in the entryway, his fingers wrapped around a baton.

"Commander," Peeta nodded as Violet and Prim rushed to the couch to tend to Darius. Katniss lead Rosalie into the kitchen to make her some tea.

"Your brother was just telling me that he found Murphy like this, on his porch. Didn't he attend your wedding, Mellark?"

"Yes sir, he did. The party hadn't been over long. We were some of the last ones left," he gestured to his brother. "And I thought Darius and Rosalie went home not long before we left. However, Rosalie said that she left before Darius did because she wasn't feeling well. Darius didn't come straight home, so she figured he was still at the party. Between leaving the Mayor's house and returning home to the peacekeepers' quarters, someone attacked him."

"Lieutenant, did you see anyone hanging around?"

"No sir. I escorted Katniss home after the ceremony and we were getting ready for bed, when we heard Ryen pounding on the door. There wasn't a lot of time for this kind of attack. It had to have been calculated."

"I'm sure we would all agree, two attacks on Peacekeepers is two too many," Thread said bitterly. "These filthy coal miners think they can get away with anything because they're far from the Capitol's reach. We need to show them we can make them hurt too."

"Sir, with all due respect, we have no idea who is responsible and we can't implicate an entire district of people." The old Peacekeeper's eyes flashed and he stepped in front of Peeta, leaning in close. The young Lieutenant stood straight, though the look in his commander's eyes terrified him.

"You're not one of them anymore, Mellark," Thread hissed in his ear. "You're a Peacekeeper. A First Lieutenant. And I can see to it that you'll be so much more." Peeta's brow furrowed in confusion as Thread leaned even closer.

"What if I told you that I can reassign you? We can allow you and your wife to relocate to another district, or even the Capitol itself. What would you say to that?"

"That's...very kind, Commander. But it's not nece-"

"Think about it," Thread cut him off. "Something to consider. Talk to your wife about it. She might fall in love with the Capitol when you visit there next week." Peeta highly doubted it.

"Of course, sir. I will definitely consider it."

"And it would keep her away from trouble." Peeta started, his face turning pale.

"What do you mean, Commander?"

"I need to speak to Mrs. Murphy. Where did she go?"

"Katniss escorted her to the kitchen, sir," Ryen waved his hand. Thread nodded and stomped off, leaving Peeta a pale, shaking mess.

"Peet? You ok?"

"Not in the slightest," he shook his head but they were cut off by garbled screams, coming from the living room. Darius was gaining consciousness and the Everdeen women gasped in horror.

"Darius, listen, you have to stay still," Violet said soothingly, pleading for him to lay back on the couch.

"Oh man," Ryen muttered, shaking his head. Peeta's wide eyes locked on his fellow soldier and swallowed heavily.

"It's no good, Mom, we need Morphling."

"We don't have any," Violet said with a shake of her head. "Darius, listen to me. You must calm down. My daughter and I will help you, alright? But you have to calm down." Darius wasn't soothed and continued to writhe all over the couch.

"He's going to pull these stitches," Prim said nervously. "Peeta, get Rosalie in here. He needs to see her." Darius started at the mention of his wife and Peeta nodded, hurrying into the kitchen. Thread was sitting at the table with a notebook in hand while Rosalie and Katniss stood behind the chairs.

"Rosalie, Darius is awake and needs you." She cast Thread a nervous glance before she rushed out of the kitchen.

"How is he," Katniss muttered, going to Peeta's side.

"Not well. He's panic-stricken and keeps tossing about. They're trying to keep him calm and still but hopefully Rosalie will help soothe him. He really needs some morphling"

"Miss Everdeen," Katniss whipped around, her back stiff. "Did you see anyone hanging about when you left Mayor Undersee's house?"

"It's Mellark, Commander Thread," she said softly. "And no sir, I didn't see anything out of the ordinary."

"Of course. My apologies...Mrs. Mellark." Katniss swallowed, never taking her eyes off of Thread. Likewise, he fixed his icy stare on her and Peeta cleared his throat.

"Katniss, can you take a bowl of water and some towels to your mother and sister?"

"Of course. Excuse me, Commander." She lowered her head and grabbed the bowl from the counter, filling it up quickly and tossing some towels over her shoulder.

"Why did you bring them with you," Thread nodded toward the kitchen door.

"Who? The Everdeens?"

"Yes. Murphy is a Peacekeeper. Surely he deserves better than a simple Coal miner's wife working on him." Peeta felt his blood boil but told himself to calm down. His Commander was one person he did not need to get into an altercation with.

"With all due respect Commander, Violet Everdeen is Darius's only hope. Aside from the fact that she is District 12's only Healer, she's excellent at what she does.

We don't really have any hospitals or doctor offices here in 12. And Primrose is her protege. I would trust both of them with my life." Thread grunted as he closed his notebook.

"If we could get some morphling from the Capitol, he would heal even more quickly. We don't have any here."

"Someone clearly thought they had gotten rid of Darius Murphy. Let's hope the Everdeens prove him wrong." Peeta frowned after his Commander, feeling like there was something else on the end of that sentence, something Thread wasn't saying.

"I will make a call to the Capitol and have some morphling sent on the next train."

"But sir, the next train could take-" but Thread had walked away and Peeta had to take a moment to get his temper under control. Like he had told Katniss, he was tired of it. What made it alright for one man and those close to him decide they would be in charge of the rest of the world? Thread thought himself superior to anyone in 12 and he wasn't even from the Capitol! He sat down at his table and rubbed his temples roughly. One thing was clear. No one was safe in 12 anymore.

* * *

It took several long hours but with some herbs from Peeta's kitchen and whispered words of love from Rosalie, Darius fell into a fitful sleep. Peeta grimaced at the sight of the blood over his couch and floor but he wasn't insensitive enough to say something aloud. Rosalie leaned against the couch, looking exhausted, while Thread spoke with the other peacekeepers. Prim and Violet had washed up in the bathroom and Peeta had offered them the bedroom since they needed to stay and keep an eye on Darius. Violet had offered to take the floor in the guest bedroom but Peeta refused to let his mother-in-law and sister-in-law sleep on the floor, even if that was what they were somewhat used to. He took blankets into the guest bedroom and created a fluffy pallet for himself and Katniss.

His wife knelt next to Rosalie and murmured comfortingly, finally convincing her to stand and follow her to the kitchen. Ryen turned to Peeta and sighed.

"We're all leaving, Peeta. Commander Thread has called a meeting early next week."

"I'll be in the Capitol," he shook his head. "But I'll tell him myself. You go on home to your wife and try to enjoy what's left of your wedding night."

"Yeah, not likely," Ryen squinted at the clock on the wall. "Don't think I could actually enjoy it anyway. Not with a fellow Peacekeeper lying there on the couch, hovering between life and death."

Violet and Prim had done the best they could but Darius's injuries were severe. In addition to blood loss, there was massive trauma from the beating and one of his eyes seemed to be sewn shut. He had drifted in and out of consciousness, his pained screams made that much more horrible by the fact that he could not actually speak.

"Something is bothering me though, Peet." Ryen glanced back at the peacekeepers and the Commander and lowered his voice.

"I don't think anyone in 12 would have done this."

"Who do you think it was then?"

"I mean, Peacekeepers create Avoxes. No one in the Seam or Merchant Circle knows how… it just feels like it was a peacekeeper who did this." Peeta nodded in

agreement.

"I'll keep my eyes and ears open when I am in the Capitol."

"Please take care of yourself, Peet," his brother implored. "Just...watch your back."

"Don't worry about me, Rye. Go home to Madge. I'm sure she's worried. I'll see you before we leave 12." Ryen patted his brother's shoulder and joined the other peacekeepers. Purnia glanced sadly at Darius, then back at Peeta.

"Tell your mother-in-law we are grateful. For taking care of him."

"I will." Thread pocketed his notebook and stuck his baton through his belt, clearing his throat loudly.

"I will make a report tomorrow morning, Lieutenant. Expect a call from the Minister sometime tomorrow."

"Yes sir." Thread and the others walked down the porch and headed back toward town. Peeta closed the door and pressed his forehead to the cool wood.

* * *

In the kitchen, Katniss pressed a mug of tea into Rosalie's hands and Rosalie sniffed.

"Thank you, Katniss."

"Drink up. I'm sure all of this can't be good for the baby." Rosalie rubbed her belly and blinked back tears.

"What am I going to do if… Darius has to be ok, Katniss. He just has to be."

"He will be," Katniss said with more assurance than she felt. "My mom and Prim are great. They can fix anything, it seems. Peeta was attacked the other night and by the time they were finished, he was so much better."

"Peeta was attacked?" Katniss's eyes widened; she hadn't meant to say that aloud and Rosalie looked stunned.

"Someone attacked the First Lieutenant? Who was it?"

"I, uh, I'm not sure-"

"It was Jacobson, wasn't it," she said, shaking her head. "Darius told me about the trouble they were having with him. He went after Peeta on his own?"

"It was three Peacekeepers. But I have no idea who it was," she lied.

"Well I'm sure they're all dead now, if the Capitol got hold of them. Darius has told me they prize Peeta… like they treat him differently. Not like he comes from 12 but like he comes from the Capitol! President Snow himself asked to speak to him. No other Peacekeeper in 12 has met the President. And the way that new Commander talks to him… he's never talked to Darius like that. To any Peacekeeper, that I know of."

"But Peeta is First Lieutenant," Katniss shrugged.

"And you don't find that strange? Someone from 12 being made First Lieutenant? Darius would never get that kind of promotion and he's not even from here! He's just lived here for so long. The Capitol has this personal vendetta against District 12!"

"Shh, you need to calm down, Rosie," she said, nodding toward her tea. She prayed that Peeta's house wasn't bugged or they would be in a lot of trouble.

"I'm so tired, Katniss," the young woman whined, covering her face with her hands.

"I know. Why don't you go get some rest? I'll look after Darius for awhile."

"I don't think I can rest," she sighed. "Every time I close my eyes, I see him with his mouth full of blood and his eyes swollen shut. Who could do that to him, Katniss? Who would hurt him like that? Darius, he's...he'd never hurt a fly!"

"I don't know, Rosie," she shook her head. "But Peeta and the others will find out. Don't worry."

"I think it finally caught up to him," Rosalie said over the rim of her cup. "They finally found out."

"What are you talking about?" Rosie's grey eyes were wide as she lowered her mug.

"They know what's happening in 12. And now they're going to kill everyone who is involved." Katniss's eyes widened in horror. How could she silence Rosalie without revealing that the house might be bugged?

Her husband, however, saved them all as he walked into the kitchen.

"I've set out some blankets for you, Rosalie, so you can get some sleep."

"Thank you so much, Peeta," she stood and her hand rested on her belly. "You and Katniss have been so great."

"We will find who did this," he said in a hard voice. "They're going to pay." Rosalie nodded and trudged out of the kitchen. Katniss sighed and pressed her hand to her forehead.

"Are you alright?" She felt his hand on her shoulder and she nodded.

"I'm really tired."

"Go get some sleep. I'll stay up and watch over Darius." She sighed and nodded before leaning up to kiss his cheek.

"Good night, then."

"Sleep well, Katniss."

* * *

Peeta settled in the chair across from the couch and watched Darius sleep. Every now and again the peacekeeper would jerk and shake his head but then would settle back into his dreams fairly quickly. Peeta's eyes felt heavy and he checked the clock on the wall. It would be light out soon and everyone had been asleep for several hours now. He wondered when he should wake Violet to check on Darius. He winced as he shifted in the chair, his side throbbing. He mentally scowled, remembering that his friend was much worse off than he was. He could handle a little aching pain.

"PEETA!" His eyes shot open and he made a grab for his rifle, but forgot he had left it by the door. Grunting in frustration, he ran down the hall and burst into the bedroom, ready to murder whoever had disturbed his wife with his bare hands.

Katniss was fighting with the blankets, her hair a tangled mess and her eyes streaming.

"Peeta, no! Please no!"

"Katniss!" He rushed toward the bed and reached for her, pulling her to his chest. She continued to fight, struggling against his hold but he held on tightly.

"Katniss, I'm right here. You're ok, love, I'm here."

"Peeta," she whimpered, hiding her face in his shirt.

"It's me," he kissed her hair. "You're alright. I won't let anything happen to you." He kissed her temple and rocked her gently, until she went limp in his arms. He only released his grasp when he was sure her nightmares had left her alone. He kissed her forehead and pulled the blanket up to her chin. As he turned to leave,

he felt her fingers close around his wrist.

"Stay with me," she whispered softly, her voice so intensely vulnerable that it made Peeta want to gather her in his lap and hide her from the world. He draped himself over her and she immediately nuzzled into his chest, his hand reaching for her messy braid. Her breathing evened out again and he trailed a single finger across her cheek, lovingly memorizing every part of her.

"Always," he breathed before leaning in to kiss her forehead and resting his head over hers.

* * *

It was horrifying, the sound that was coming from the living room. Peeta jerked awake and looked around. Katniss was sitting straight up in bed, her eyes wide.

"Is that-"

"Darius," he said before throwing the covers aside and rushing into the living room. Katniss nearly slammed into him as they saw Darius writhing on the floor, tossing his head in agony. Rosalie and Prim knelt next to him, attempting to calm him and Violet was hurriedly mixing something in one of Peeta's bowls.

"Listen to me, baby, you have to calm down," Rosalie pleaded, her eyes full of tears. "The Everdeens will help you but you have to calm down. It's going to hurt worse if you keep moving around like this."

"Mom, he's pulled the stitches," Prim said softly, jumping up to grab her bowl of supplies.

"He needs morphling," Rosalie shook her head. "Why won't the Capitol rush it? Why do they want him to suffer like this?"

"I'm going to call the Minister of Defense," Peeta said stiffly, making the women jump. They clearly hadn't realized he was in the room, and Violet nodded.

"Good. Prim, go ahead and redo those stitches. Rosalie, see if you can coax some of this down his throat, to help with the pain."

"Let me get a glass," Katniss rushed past them toward the kitchen. Darius was starting to calm down slightly but tears of pain streamed down his cheeks.

"I know, baby," his wife stroked his cheek. "I know you're in pain. But here, maybe this will help some." She lifted his hand to her belly and clutched his wrist. His eyes rested on their joined hands before drifting up to hers.

"We need you, Darius. Don't think about leaving us." Peeta swallowed thickly as he tore his eyes away from the scene and headed into the kitchen to make the phone call.

Katniss was pulling a glass from the cabinet when Peeta entered and she sighed heavily.

"I hate that you have to deal with all of this."

"I'm his Lieutenant. I'm the one who should be dealing with this."

"I just mean, after everything… I know you're in pain. I can see it on your face."

"I'll manage. My main concern is him right now." She nodded and brushed past him but he grabbed her wrist and merely held it for a moment. Just the feel of her skin against his gave him strength, feeling connected to her in whatever way he could at that moment. She squeezed his hand before taking the glass to her mother.

Peeta picked up the phone and dialed the number, waiting with bated breath while the device played some kind of annoying little tune. Capitol people, he rolled his eyes and shook his head.

* * *

Katniss stood back and watched as Rosalie tipped the healing concoction down Darius's throat. She used her fingers to gently massage his adam's apple, the way Violet had shown her.

"Will it help him," Katniss whispered to her mother.

"It might alleviate some of the pain but it won't do a lot. We had to perform surgery to fix some of the damage. Whoever did this had no idea what they were doing. He's going to be in a lot more pain unless we sedate him and I can't really do that when we need him to swallow medicine. I don't know, Katniss, I'm not sure what else we can do." Katniss chewed on her lip as Rosalie pushed his red locks out of his face and cradled his head in her lap.

"Let's let him sleep some. I doubt you and Peeta got much rest, so why don't you both head back to bed? Prim and I are fine to look after him." She wanted to refuse but she was exhausted. She wondered if she could convince Peeta to come to bed with her.

"I'm going to make him some more of your herbal tea, see if I can help him relax a little."

"Good idea. We don't want him to make his fracture any worse either. Convince him to take care of himself first."

"That's going to be hard. Peeta puts everyone's needs before his own."

"Perhaps if you show him that he has something to keep fighting for… the way Rosalie did for Darius…" she trailed off and Katniss's eyes went to the floor. She knew what her mother was referring to but she didn't have a response to it. So she cleared her throat and headed toward the kitchen. Peeta was just hanging up the phone when she entered, and she went straight to the stove.

"What did the Minister say?"

"He's outraged that another peacekeeper has been attacked. He said he would send morphling by train but it will take too long so instead, we are taking Darius to the Capitol with us. He will be taken care of there."

"Rosalie too?"

"He didn't say but I can't imagine she wants to stay behind. I'll ensure their safety, as District 12 citizens." She nodded and set the kettle on the stove.

"What are you doing?"

"Making you some of Mom's healing tea. She said you need to take care of yourself too."

"I'm fi-"

"And stop saying you're fine," she cut him off, shooting him a glare. "You're in pain and you need to relax. Once you drink your tea, you head straight to bed."

"You're bossy," he approached her and rested his hands on her hips.

"I just fight for those I love," she said, her steely eyes locked on his. His lips curved upwards and his azure eyes swam. She pressed forward and kissed him, her hand tangling in his curls. The kettle started to whistle and she jumped back, moving it off the stove and reaching for the mint leaves. He stopped her, however, and cradled her face while he leaned forward to kiss her again.

"Ok, that's enough, tiger. What we did last night could not have helped your injury."

"Probably not but I don't really care," he mumbled against her lips.

"Well I care," she took a step back and placed a finger on his lips. "You need rest. Mom said she and Prim will watch over Darius. Here." She handed him a mug and added another mint leaf to it.

"Let me check this." He nearly choked on his tea as she lifted his shirt and her palm gently pressed around the bruise. She hated how it looked, marring his fair skin, and he grunted when she prodded a particular area.

"Thought you weren't a Healer," he tried not to smile.

"I'm not but that doesn't mean I can't check in on you."

"Do I pass inspection?"

"Hardly. I would rather you healthy and pain-free."

"When you touch me, the pain goes away completely." She rolled her eyes and stood back up.

"You're such a sap."

"I prefer to be called a hopeless romantic."

"Ok Romeo, drink your tea."

"Romeo? As in Romeo Montague?" She shrugged.

"As in that horrible book we had to read in English class."

"Romeo and Juliet were star-crossed lovers. Are we star-crossed?"

"I don't even know what that means," she scoffed. He chuckled and caressed her cheek.

"You weren't paying attention in class?"

"Mr. Edwins droned on and on and on! I think I fell asleep at least three times a week."

"He was passionate about literature and it showed in his lessons."

"Clearly I didn't care as much about books as he did."

"OK well, back in ancient times, people said they could read the stars and that the stars controlled someone's destiny. So the term 'star-crossed lovers- means the couple is fated to fail from the start. That the universe is working against them and it will most likely end in tragedy, like in Romeo and Juliet." She wrinkled her nose and he laughed.

"So I ask again, are we star-crossed?"

"No," she leaned forward and left a sweet kiss on his lips, relishing his sugary taste that came from him and not from the tea. She raked her tongue along his bottom lip and his parted slightly with a groan, his tongue slipping into her mouth. He cupped her cheek, his other hand still holding the mug of hot tea away from them both and they had to break away for breath. She kissed the tip of his nose before stepping back.

"We're not star-crossed." She gave him a smile and turned to pour some tea for her mother and sister and Peeta watched her, thinking that she might just be right.


	26. Chapter 26

Katniss practically had to push Peeta back into bed but he fell asleep rather quickly, curled up on his uninjured side. She lay beside him, her eyes flicking back to him every now and again to make sure he was still beside her, still living and breathing. She couldn't explain her sudden rush of affection toward him. By all accounts (at least in her mind) they still looked at this like a contract. She knew he loved her… and she was fairly certain that she loved him, or the very least, that she was falling in love with him. She'd as good as told him so, hadn't she?

But what really bothered her was the amount of time that had passed. How had she gone from marrying a practical stranger to feeling like she couldn't let this man out of her sight in such a short amount of days? Had it been this easy for her parents? Her mother had said she'd fallen in love as soon as she heard her father sing. Katniss had always scoffed at the thought. After all, she had vowed never to marry, never to have children, never to change herself for someone else.

But as she watched him sleep, she knew he was a part of her now and she wouldn't be able to walk away from him in five years. She didn't know what was going to happen but she had been right in telling him she fights for those she loves. And she vowed to protect him, whatever way she could.

Peeta shifted in his sleep and reached out his hand. She captured it in midair and brought it to her lips; his mouth curved upwards and he sighed in his sleep. She could hear her mother and sister talking loudly right outside the door but she wanted to let him sleep as long as possible. She carefully slid out of the bed and slipped out the door.

"Hey," she whispered. "You're going to wake Peeta if you keep talking that loudly."

"Sorry Katniss but we should probably get him up anyway," Prim said regretfully.

"Why?"

"Darius was trying to communicate with us earlier and we discovered whoever attacked him did something else." Katniss waited, a frown crossing her face.

"Both of his hands are broken," Prim said softly.

"What?!"

"Obviously whoever did this, knew they could be identified if Darius survived. This is just way too calculated to be a coincidence."

"Why didn't you-" she clamped her jaw when the door behind them opened and Peeta appeared, shrugging on his shirt.

"I'm sorry if we woke you, Peeta."

"That's alright, Violet, I noticed Katniss missing and couldn't really sleep anymore. Is everything alright?"

"Darius's hands are broken," Katniss said impatiently. Peeta's face darkened immediately.

"What?"

"We think that the attack was planned," Violet said quietly. "And that the attacker wanted to keep Darius from identifying him, if he survived. But they left him there to bleed to death so I doubt they believed he would make it."

"How are you just figuring this out, though," Katniss asked. Prim scowled, which actually made Peeta take a step back. The sunshine of a girl rarely scowled and it didn't suit her.

"We were busy keeping him from bleeding to death," she snapped. "Forgive us if we didn't have time to catalogue his injuries!"

"Katniss didn't mean anything by it, Prim," Peeta said gently. "This is obviously a surprise to all of us. And really bad news. I had hoped he would be able to give us some kind of sign as to who has done this."

"I had to give him some sleep syrup," Violet shook her head. "He's in too much pain right now and keeps getting frustrated that he can't speak. Rosalie actually asked about his hand when she held it but we brushed it off. I hope the doctors in the Capitol can perform the surgery he needs. Broken hands can be fixed. Other things...can't be."

"This cannot be good for Rosalie and the baby," Peeta sighed. "Can you give her some sleep syrup too?"

"It would harm the baby but I have some ingredients at home that I can mix to make something that would be alright for them. I need to go home and get more gauze anyway."

"I'll escort you," he said quickly. "You don't need to walk through the district alone right now." Violet nodded and Peeta tucked a baton into his jeans.

"Katniss, you and Prim stay here and keep an eye on Rosalie and Darius. Don't open the door to anyone, until I return home. Understood?"

"Yes sir," Prim gave a mock salute and her mother shot her a deadly look.

"We understand," Katniss nodded. Peeta nodded and locked the door behind Violet and him.

"What was that," Katniss asked irritatedly as soon as they were gone.

"I was just going to ask you the same thing! Since when are you so timid and meek around your big peacekeeper husband?"

"Prim, this is the second peacekeeper attack in a matter of days! We have to be careful and Peeta is trying to keep us safe. I'm surprised at you."

"And I'm surprised at you. You're the Huntress of District 12, Kat. You greet challenges with your head held high. You don't take orders from anyone and you've never let a man tell you what to do. I thought you said this was only a contract to you."

"I don't need to explain myself or my feelings to you," Katniss said heatedly. "Peeta is First Lieutenant. Show him a little respect." Prim gaped at her as she stormed toward the kitchen and followed her a moment later.

"Spill it, sis!"

"Spill what," Katniss refused to turn to face her.

"You're so wishy-washy about Peeta right now! What is going through your head?"

"I don't want to lose him!" Prim stared at her sister, shocked by the outburst. Katniss hung her head and sighed.

"Prim I… you and Madge are right. I lo-... I'm falling… ugh damn it, I can't even say the damn words! But I keep having nightmares about losing him. And I can't. I kept saying I won't be like Mom but it's too late. I can't lose him. And he was already attacked once… he's weakened and I just… I'm scared. I'm scared to go to the Capitol because I'm sure there are people there who will want to hurt us. With everything going on around here, I just… I'm scared." She shrugged and Prim crossed the room in two steps, pulling her big sister into her arms.

"You and Peeta are both strong. You've always been so fearless, I didn't think anything scared you."

"The thought of losing you does," she said, rubbing Prim's fair cheek. "And now, losing him."

"Well, I'm glad you finally admitted it to yourself. Have you told him?"

"Not those exact words, but kind of."

"That's not confusing at all."

"Shut up."

"How does he put up with you?"

"I don't know but he seems to want to. And I don't think it's just a contract anymore. I think in five years, when the contract expires… things may just...stay the same."

"You're ridiculous sometimes, Katty," Prim snickered. "You make a big deal out of the little things. Like how much he means to you. Just tell him already!"

"I'm going to. When everything calms down around here."

"I'm starving. Does your baker keep any food in his fridge?"

"It's fully stocked, Prim. Want me to fix you something?"

"Whoa," Prim's eyes widened as she opened the fridge and Katniss smiled. "I want to eat it all."

"Let's start with sandwiches and some soup, and then if you're still hungry, you can find something else."

Prim brought Rosalie into the kitchen to have some food and the three women talked softly as they ate their turkey and cheese sandwiches and sipped at their cups of soup. When Peeta and Violet returned, Rosalie had passed out on the table, her face hidden in her arm.

"Guess she didn't need sleep syrup after all," Katniss whispered.

"I'll go ahead and mix some of this just in case," Violet reached for a bowl. Katniss handed Peeta a bowl of soup, which he took with a grateful nod.

"I'm going to check on Darius," Prim set her bowl on the counter. "Don't wash it, I want some more." Peeta smiled as she passed and exited the kitchen. The phone rang and his brow furrowed as he moved to pick it up.

"Mellark," his tone was authoritative but his brow raised in surprise. "Yes sir. Yes, I understand. Alright, I will make sure we are ready. Thank you, General. Good day to you." Peeta hung up and Katniss cocked her head.

"What was that about?"

"We're leaving for the Capitol a bit earlier than planned."

"OK. When?" He swallowed as he turned back to her.

"Tonight."

* * *

"Please take care of yourself," her mother murmured in her ear as they embraced.

"I'll be fine. I won't leave his side."

"Take care of my sister," Prim made him promise as she hugged him around the middle.

"With my life, Prim."

"Are you sure you don't want us to walk with you to the station," Rye asked anxiously, his hands shoved in his pockets. "Purnia and the others have already gotten Darius and Rosalie settled on the train, and they will have left by now. I really don't like the thought of you two walking there by yourselves."

"Since when did my big brother become such a worry-wart," Peeta winked.

"Since my little brother developed a knack for getting into trouble!"

"I'll be fine, Rye. We both will. You'll take care of things while I'm gone?"

"Of course, Peet. Just...come back safe, alright?" They hugged quickly and clapped each other's shoulders.

"Rye… I need you to promise me...if anything happens… you'll take care of them?" Ryen's eyes flicked to the Everdeen women and back to his brother and he nodded.

"You know I will. But you'd better come back. The little one scares me." Peeta snorted.

"She's like her sister. Strong. Fierce. A force to be reckoned with," he dropped his voice and leaned in. "If you hear anything strange, you take them out of here. Don't stop running. She says she will welcome us if things go bad for 12."

"That's great but where has she been all this time?"

"Don't ask questions like that. Just promise me you and Madge will get the family and the Everdeens and whoever else you can out of here."

"We will. Peet, I want to tell Madge what's going on." Peeta glanced over at Madge, who was in conversation with his wife and he sighed.

"Rye-"

"I know you're going to say it's dangerous but I trust her. And I want her to know everything. I mean, I'm going to tell her everything. About...our training. And everything that has been going on around here. All of it." Peeta looked surprised.

"I'm proud of you, Rye. She's a good one. She's bound to keep you in line."

"We can only hope," he grinned. "Safe travels, baby bro." Peeta shoved his brother away and they crossed over to their wives.

"You ready, Katniss?" She nodded and he took her suitcase in hand.

"Be careful," Prim said, her eyes wide.

"We will see you all next week," Peeta said firmly. "Prim, remember, eat all my food before it spoils." He winked at the girl and she grinned.

"You can count on me, Peeta." He grasped Katniss's hand and they made their way down the path and towards the other side of town, where the train station was. Katniss stayed close to his side, feeling anxious as they walked into the night. She wanted to ask why they were leaving in the middle of the night but she was sure she would sound paranoid. Peeta seemed to have no problem with his General's orders and they were silent as they walked.

"It's so nice of you to let them stay in your house while we're away," she said, eager to break the silence.

"It's your house too, Katniss," he said softly. "And they're your family. Which makes them important to me. I want them to be comfortable and well-fed. I made Ryen promise to keep an eye on them too." Katniss nodded gratefully and squeezed his hand.

* * *

Peeta was relieved to see several peacekeepers along the way, all who nodded to him silently and he nodded back. Darius was well-liked in the district and they all knew the train would take him to care and healing. Peeta still couldn't fathom who had done that to the peacekeeper. Ryen was convinced that it had been a peacekeeper but according to Katniss, Violet said the job had been messy and the attacker had no idea what they were doing. Not that Peeta was an expert at removing tongues but he knew there was a certain way to do it and hacking at the tongue just wasn't the way to go. So if it wasn't a peacekeeper, who was it?

Peeta had been trained in torture in District 2, and it still haunted him to this day. Though he had never turned anyone into an avox before Jacobson, he had been forced to do some truly horrible things and the way that the Capitol praised him for his "accomplishments" truly disgusted him. And of course coming from 12, he was a victim of those tortures first. He had to prove himself before anyone actually believed he was worth anything. The Capitol's ability to polish away scars and marks was the one way Peeta could hide his past. He was grateful that the Capitol had taken the initiative before he had married; he couldn't bear the thought of what Katniss would say if she had seen those marks on him. He still hadn't shared all of the details with her and wasn't sure if he ever could. He was shocked that

Rye was telling Madge everything but he was also proud of his brother for opening up.

Katniss's gentle nudge snapped him out of his less than pleasant thoughts and he realized they were at the train station. The conductor nodded and offered to take their bags.

"Good evening, Lieutenant."

"Good evening. I'll hold onto this one, if you don't mind." He clutched the strap of his bag and the conductor nodded.

"Of course, sir. Ma'am," he held out his hand to help Katniss up onto the platform.

"Go ahead and choose a compartment, Katniss. I'll be right behind you." She nodded and stepped onto the train, her eyes widening at the luxury around here. She had never been on a train and didn't know anyone, other than her husband, who had. She supposed Madge had been, when she had gone to the Capitol when she was younger. She bent to study the pattern on the tablecloth when she felt someone come up behind her. The hairs stood on the back of her neck and told her immediately that it wasn't Peeta.

"Good evening, Mrs. Mellark." She shivered at the cold voice and she straightened up to face him.

"Good evening, Commander Thread."

"Commander," Peeta said in surprise, joining her immediately and grasping her hand at their side. "I wasn't aware you were joining us on this trip."

"I haven't seen dear Aurelia Snow in quite some time. I of course want to wish her a happy birthday in person."

"Of course," Peeta nodded. "Well it will be a pleasure to travel alongside you. Although I daresay the trip will be a short one. What was it the conductor said? 200 miles per hour?"

"And you can barely feel a thing," Thread nodded. "It's my favorite way to travel, besides hovercraft. Your wife has never been on a train, I presume?"

"No Commander, but I'm looking forward to it. I also look forward to seeing the Capitol for the first time."

"Ah you're in for a real treat."

"Commander, which compartment are Darius and Rosalie in?"

"Peackeeper Murphy is across from mine so I can keep an eye on him. I told his wife to take her own so she will be more comfortable. They both fell asleep as soon as they boarded the train." Peeta frowned but Thread was helping himself to a plate of pastries and poured himself a glass of scotch. "Drink, Mellark?"

"Ah, no thank you sir. I'm not a huge drinker myself."

"You can pour that glass for me, then," a voice said behind them. Thread's face darkened slightly.

"Abernathy. I wasn't aware you were joining us on this trip."

"Oh President Snow was kind enough to extend the birthday invitation to Victors as well. Figured I would catch the same train as my Commander and Lieutenant, for safety reasons. You understand, of course."

"Of course. Excuse me." Thread slipped out of the compartment and Peeta turned to face the newcomer.

"Katniss, this is Haymitch Abernathy, Victor of the 50th Hunger Games."

"Pleasure, sweetheart. So you're the new Mrs. Mellark?"

"You were at our wedding so should know that's true. Except I think you were passed out drunk in a chair somewhere." Haymitch released a bark which could have been a laugh.

"I like this one. She's got spunk." Peeta grinned but Katniss scowled.

"So you've been invited to the Capitol too."

"No sweetheart, I'm just here for the refreshments," Haymitch winked as he helped himself to a glass of scotch. "Sure you don't want a glass, Lieutenant? Her scowl is already giving me a headache." Katniss rolled her eyes and stomped out of the entryway. Peeta sighed and shook his head.

"What did I say about trying not to irritate her?"

"It's too easy," the Victor shrugged. "So the Commander is on board as well."

"Yes. General Duartyr said Commander Thread was going to wait a few days to travel but I suppose he decided to arrive in the Capitol earlier than planned."

"Interesting that this train was his choice then," Haymitch sipped at his glass and Peeta gripped his bag. "We have several Victors on board as well." Peeta nodded in understanding.

"I should find Katniss. Sleep well, Haymitch."

"You do the same, Lieutenant. See you in the morning."

* * *

Peeta glanced around, trying to find some idea of where Darius and Rosalie were sleeping but all of the compartments were sealed tightly. In fact, he had no idea which one his wife had chosen. He swallowed, his eyes flying down the hall, wondering if he was going to have to find an empty compartment until he saw her at breakfast.

"If you're looking for your wife, I directed her to Compartment 11," a meek female voice said behind him. He spun around, his wide eyes moving up and down the woman's tiny frame.

"I'm assuming you are First Lieutenant Peeta Mellark?"

"Yes, that's correct. And you are?"

"Arcadia Longstorm." His eyes widened.

"The Victor Arcadia Longstorm?"

"That's correct, sir," she said softly, her eyes darting to the floor. "And this is Porter," she motioned to the compartment on her right, and a thin man stood from his bed.

"Porter Longfellow, at your service Lieutenant." Peeta shook the man's hand and was stunned at how weak his grasp was. He'd expected Victors to be more hulking and intimidating but Arcadia and Porter both looked like a strong gust of wind would knock them over.

"It's a pleasure to meet you both," Peeta nodded. "Miss Longstorm, did you say you spoke to my wife?"

"Dark hair, slender build? I directed her to Compartment 11. The others are full."

"I thank you for your assistance. Um, could you direct me there as well?"

"It's across from my mine," she gestured for him to follow her and he glanced back at the male Victor.

"It was nice to meet you, Mr. Longfellow."

"Porter, please. And likewise, Lieutenant Mellark. I'm sure I will see you soon." Peeta nodded and Porter returned to his compartment, sliding it closed. Arcadia lead him down the hall and around the corner, stopping in front of a larger compartment.

"Some of them are singles and some are doubles. I thought you both would be more comfortable in a double."

"You're very kind, Miss Longstorm, I thank you."

"Arcadia, please, Lieutenant. We seem to have a mutual acquaintance."

"Oh?"

"Haymitch told us you would be on this train as well." He stopped and Arcadia glanced back at him.

"Oh?"

"Well Haymitch Abernathy is an old friend. We Victors communicate amongst each other. About events such as this."

"Such as what," he asked with a frown.

"A special invitation to the Capitol, of course," her brown eyes widened. "Haymitch speaks highly of you, Lieutenant. He wants some of the Victors to meet you. He says you are very just."

"I just do my job, Miss Longstorm, and try to keep people out of harm's way," Peeta hoisted his bag higher onto his shoulder. Arcadia's lips tightened.

"This way, Lieutenant," she gestured to the compartment adjacent to them and around the corner, Peeta saw Katniss's slender frame leaning against the threshold. She was speaking to another woman, their voices soft. The other woman trailed off, her eyes catching Peeta's over Katniss's shoulder. Katniss turned and sighed.

"There you are!"

"I'm sorry, Katniss, I was conversing with the Victors from District 6."

"Yes, Arcadia helped me find an empty compartment. And this is Miss Sanchez, from District 8."

"Cecilia Sanchez," Cecilia nodded to Peeta. "And you must be the First Lieutenant of District 12."

"Peeta Mellark, ma'am." Cecilia's handshake was firmer than the previous Victors' had been. Cecilia's smile was warm but there was something hidden in her eyes. Peeta had seen it in a lot of young mothers' eyes in 2. She glanced at Katniss and back at Arcadia.

"Well, we should all probably get some rest. I expect I will see you in the Capitol, Lieutenant."

"It was an honor to meet you both," Peeta nodded to both women as they slipped into their compartments. Katniss sat on the bed as Peeta closed the door tightly.

"Did you find Darius and Rosalie?"

"No, Commander Thread said they fell asleep as soon as they got on board. I'll try to speak to Rosalie in the morning. I hope the medicine your mother gave her will help her sleep tonight." Peeta set his bag down and pulled out some clothes.

"Here, I packed you a pair of pajamas so you'll be more comfortable."

"Thank you," she said with surprise, taking them from her. They changed quickly, Katniss facing the wall. She didn't know why but she felt more exposed on this luxurious train than she did in their bedroom. She climbed into bed and waited for Peeta to scoot in beside her. She curled onto her side and his arm draped over her waist. She closed her eyes as she felt him kiss her hair.

"How is your side?"

"Sore but I can tell it's getting better. Your mother is a miracle worker."

"Are you sure you don't want me to put anything on it?"

"I'm fine love," his warm breath on her neck made her shiver. "Get some rest. I know you haven't gotten a lot in the past few days."

"No less than you."

"We should be at the Capitol sometime tomorrow mid-day. Do you need anything?"

"Would you stop fussing over me and go to sleep," she scolded him. But he merely chuckled and kissed her temple.

"Sleep well, Katniss."

* * *

Peeta's side was throbbing when he woke up but he didn't want Katniss to know he was in pain. She was wrapped completely around him, their arms entangled and her leg underneath his. He wondered how they had slept this way; now that he was awake, it was quite uncomfortable and the compartment was rather stuffy.

He gently kissed her forehead as he struggled to free himself without waking her. She moaned and twisted onto her side, tucking her fist under her chin. He smiled as he quickly dressed, his eyes never leaving her sleeping form. He sat in the chair to pull on his boots and bent low to double knot the laces.

Katniss's eyes shot open as she sat straight in bed. Peeta didn't need to ask her if she'd had a nightmare; her pale face and her fearful expression told him everything.

"Easy," he rushed to her side and sat on the edge of the bed. "You're ok. You're safe." She clung to his arm for a moment, allowing his warmth to surround her. She'd been dreaming of her father but she struggled to grasp the images that were swimming in her mind. Now she couldn't even remember what he had told her right before she'd woken up.

"Do you want to talk about it," he asked as he smoothed her hair. She shook her head and threw the blankets off.

"Let's go get some breakfast." He watched her with a concerned frown as she pulled her clothes and shoes on. She quickly braided her hair and turned to look at him. "What?"

"Nothing," he shook his head and slid the compartment door open. "Our dining room is toward the back of the train."

"Our dining room?"

"I mean...the one we are meant to use. Reserved for Peacekeepers and people of… particular statures." Katniss rolled her eyes in disgust but lead the way down the hall.

Haymitch, Cecilia, Arcadia and a man they hadn't met were sitting at the table already.

"Ah. Lieutenant Mellark. Why don't you and your lovely wife join us?"

"Thank you," Peeta nodded as he held a chair out for Katniss to sit.

"I believe you've already met?" He gestured toward the women and Peeta nodded.

"We met last night. I don't believe I've had the pleasure, though," he indicated the man to Haymitch's right. The man had dark skin and dark eyes, with deep crinkles that told them he liked to laugh. He stood and bent to shake Peeta's hand. His sleeve rode up and Peeta's eyes widened as he realized what he was about to take hold of. The man roared with laughter at Peeta's expression and Haymitch snorted, shaking his head.

"Chaff likes to remind everyone that he lost his hand in his Games."

"The look on peoples' faces amuses me," he held out his good hand for Peeta to shake. "Nice to meet you, Lieutenant."

"Likewise."

"And who have we here?" He looked directly at Katniss and smiled.

"This is Lieutenant Mellark's wife, Katniss."

"Katniss. As lovely as her name." Katniss yanked her hand out of Chaff's and tucked her hands in her lap. Chaff laughed and sat back down.

"I was just telling Haymitch how eager I am to see your district again, Lieutenant Mellark."

"Peeta, please ma'am," he nodded to Cecilia. "And we would be delighted to have you visit whenever you wish."

"Are you traveling there soon," Arcadia asked with wide eyes. Katniss noticed that the Victor had a permanent look of surprise about her. Whereas the other Victor from 6, Porter, looked wary and defeated. Katniss had heard the Victors turned to different methods to deal with their grief and trauma. She supposed it made sense, then, that Haymitch was always drunk. She guessed it was as good as any way to deal with what he had been through.

"No no, not immediately. I was just referring to the upcoming 80th celebration Victory Tour."

"What's that," Katniss asked with a frown.

"All of the living Victors will travel around Panem for the 80th celebration of the Hunger Games," Cecilia said softly, her eyes darting to Katniss. "Most of us haven't visited other districts since our own Victory Tours."

"Do we know who else is expected to Miss Snow's birthday celebration," Haymitch asked as he took a swig from his flask. Chaff nudged him and Haymitch rolled his eyes as he handed his flask over.

"Johanna and Finnick are joining us later in the week. They both had prior engagements to attend first. Cashmere, Gloss, Brutus, Enobaria, and Lyme are all already there. Mags is coming later on as well."

"They're making Mags attend," Haymitch's eyes flashed. Cecilia cleared her throat and gave him a pointed look.

"She was delighted to receive the invitation. She is just having a little bit of trouble getting around these days." Haymitch sucked in a breath and took another deep drink from his flask. Cecilia gave him a reproachful look before turning back to Peeta and Katniss.

"Katniss says she has never been to the Capitol, Peeta, but I understand you have?"

"Once before I was promoted to First Lieutenant," he nodded. "It's quite a place."

"Isn't it though," Chaff snorted.

"There's Seeder and Porter. I was wondering what was keeping them," Haymitch waved to the two people who had just entered the room. Katniss had met Porter last night but she did not recognize the dark-skinned woman at his side.

"Hey, join us," Haymitch moved two chairs around. "Seeder, have you met Lieutenant Peeta Mellark or his wife yet?"

"I haven't had the pleasure," Seeder nodded to them. "Welcome aboard."

"Thank you, ma'am," Peeta said graciously. "I'm delighted to meet so many Victors. I only met two when I was in the Capitol."

"Let me guess," Cecilia said, a hint of irritation in her mild tone. "Johanna Mason was one of them?"

"And Finnick Odair," he nodded. "They were both very gracious and welcoming." Haymitch snorted loudly.

"I would never use those words to describe Johanna Mason."

"She was quite friendly to me," Peeta said somewhat defensively.

"Indeed?" Haymitch's eyes darted to Katniss and he looked amused. "I imagine she tried to befriend you right into the bedroom." Peeta's cheeks reddened and Cecilia rolled her eyes.

"Really Haymitch, grow up." Haymitch held his flask up as if toasting her and winked. Katniss frowned, glancing sideways at Peeta. He had never mentioned meeting Victors before. And she knew from past interviews and Holo specials that Johanna was quite attractive, quickly becoming a favorite in the Capitol.

Her usual doubts came flooding back, invading her mind with images of Peeta with someone else. She clenched her fists in her lap and stared at the table. She hoped her face wasn't as red as it felt.

"Well, you will certainly meet more Victors this week. Everyone has been invited to the Presidential Mansion for Miss Snow's party. I hope you both have gotten plenty of rest. Capitol parties are known to be a little wild." Peeta's brow raised at Chaff.

"I thought his granddaughter was only turning 16?" Chaff raised his brow right back, as if to say what's your point.

"Do we know if she will be presented with… the usual gift," Arcadia asked, her eyes on the floor.

"It seems likely," Haymitch nodded. "Though I don't know for certain. She is 16, though. And President Snow is nothing if not traditional." Everyone's faces darkened and Peeta felt completely lost.

"I'm afraid I didn't have time to purchase a gift for Miss Snow," he mumbled. "I wonder if I might be able to visit a Capitol store when we arrive?"

"Oh the President won't mind that," Seeder shook her head. "Peacekeepers rarely bring gifts. Miss Snow does not expect it."

"Speaking of Peacekeepers," Katniss suddenly stood, surprising everyone. "I would like to find Rosalie and Darius. I'm sure Rosalie would like some company." Haymitch's brow quirked and he leaned toward Peeta.

"Yes, you might should find them and check on them, Lieutenant. I imagine Darius is still in a lot of pain."

"Ah, yes of course. Katniss, I'll escort you to the-"

"I can find the compartments myself, thank you." He looked taken aback by her abruptness but she nodded to the table, muttered that it was nice to meet everyone, and stomped flat-footed out of the dining room. Peeta rubbed the back of his neck, frowning after her.

"You should go after her, Peeta," Arcadia said in a dazed voice. "Women can get jealous so very easily and it only takes a moment for that jealousy to boil over into something else entirely." Cecilia and Seeder nodded in understanding.

"Jealous? I don't underst…" Peeta's eyes widened in realization and he shook his head. "Won't you all excuse me?" Haymitch nodded and Peeta rushed after Katniss.

Once she was out of the dining room, she exhaled and wrapped her arms around herself. The rage continued to boil inside her and she squeezed her eyes shut. She hadn't heard anything else the Victors were talking about after Haymitch's little joke. She didn't think Peeta had actually done anything with Johanna Mason. But why hadn't he mentioned meeting her, or Finnick Odair, before no?

He'd said he would tell her everything. But he still refused to talk about his training and whatever else had happened in 2. So it was possible that Johanna had tried to seduce Peeta into her bed when he had visited the Capitol.

She clenched and unclenched her fists, trying to hold onto her sanity.

Peeta loves me. He's said so over and over.

That doesn't mean he hasn't been with others before you, that nasty voice taunted her inside her head.

No. He's told me that he's a virgin too.

So what? You know that he's done things before. Maybe she's shown him things that you're just too pure to understand.

She scowled and whirled around at the sound of his panicked voice.

"Katniss, there you are!" He grabbed her arm but she shrugged him off. His brow furrowed as he stood in front of her.

"What are you doing?"

"I told you, I'm going to find Darius and Rosalie."

"Katniss, look, I know what you're thinking-"

"Oh you do? Well then tell me, Peeta. Since you're so smart, tell me what I'm thinking."

"Katniss, I promise you, there is no reason for you to be jealous. I never did anything-"

"Who said I was jealous," her voice was high-pitched and her scowl deepened, causing him to take a step back. "What would I be jealous about?"

"I don't know but I just want you to know that Haymitch is just trying to get a rise out of you. I haven't… I never did anything with Johanna Mason. I don't even know her!" Katniss was about to respond when a compartment door opened at the end of the hall. Peeta straightened up and Katniss saw the transformation occur before her eyes.

"Commander Thread," he nodded, his voice back to his respectful but emotionless tone.

"Good morning Lieutenant. Mrs. Mellark."

"Commander," she forced her face into an expression of respect.

"The conductor just informed me we are barely an hour from the Capitol. Will you inform the Victors for me?"

"Of course sir." Thread nodded and made to return to his compartment. "Ah Commander Thread, sir. Katniss was hoping to check on Rosalie. In her delicate condition, you can understand that we are very worried about her."

"Mrs. Murphy was still sleeping when I checked on her husband. Let's let her sleep until we arrive in the Capitol. I have arranged lodging for her while her husband is to be taken straight to the nearest medical facility."

"I would like to accompany him, if I may, Commander."

"I'm afraid that's not possible, Lieutenant. Minister Antonius has asked to speak to you as soon as we arrive. I'm to escort your wife to your rooms and you are to report to the Defense Center." Peeta swallowed and reached for Katniss's hand. She was so anxious that she forgot she was mad at him.

"Sir, as it is my wife's first time to the Capitol, I'm sure you'll understand that we are both uneasy with the idea of separating. Given what all has been happening in our home district lately, we would both feel better if we could stay together."

"I understand your hesitation, Mellark, but this order comes from General Duartyr and Minister Antonius. You don't want to start disobeying orders from the higher ups."

"Of course not, Commander," Peeta stammered. "It's just…"

"Your wife is in excellent hands, Lieutenant," Thread's eyes went past Peeta and rested on Katniss. Her heart hammered in her chest. Peeta inhaled deeply.

"Of course, Commander Thread. We understand."

"Inform the Victors, then, Lieutenant. We will arrive within the hour." He disappeared in his compartment and Katniss clutched her husband's hand.

"Peeta-"

"I'll take care of it, Katniss. I promise." He pulled her back toward the dining room.

"You can't disobey your orders," she hissed, shaking her head.

"Haymitch, a word," he called, ignoring Katniss's protest. Haymitch nodded and motioned for Peeta to follow him to the back of the train. Katniss had no idea what they were talking about but they returned moments later and Peeta looked pale. He forced a smile, however, and suggested they finish their breakfast. Katniss had no appetite whatsoever but she picked at the muffin Cecilia had passed to her until they heard the conductor's voice announcing they were approaching the Capitol. She glanced out the window and her eyes widened at the sheer size of it all.

"It's huge," she muttered. The Victors all had different reactions to the sight. Porter and Arcadia both seemed to withdraw into themselves, looking resigned. Cecilia's eyes flashed and her lips tightened. Chaff and Haymitch looked bored and Seeder looked irritated. Katniss glanced at Peeta and saw he was staring out the window with his jaw locked. He tore his eyes away, meeting Katniss's and softening immediately.

"Let's go." She took his hand and followed him back to the compartment. He grabbed his bag, made sure they hadn't left anything, and gripped her hand as they stepped out onto the platform.


	27. Chapter 27

Katniss couldn't just focus on one thing. People milled about, wearing the strangest clothes she had ever seen. Not even Effie Trinkett's Reaping outfits were this outrageous. She gaped as a woman walked by with a pink poodle on a leash. She jumped as she felt Peeta's hand slip into her own, squeezing comfortingly. She tried to smile but her attention was grabbed by something else and her head whipped around. The train station was noisy with multiple trains coming and going. People were calling to their loved ones and in the distance, she could see buildings rising high into the sky. She vaguely noticed Peeta speaking to the conductor but she didn't pay attention to what was being said.

They collected their bags from the back of the platform and Peeta wrapped his arm around her waist. Thread was up ahead, speaking to two Capitol peacekeepers.

"Lieutenant Mellark," he spotted Peeta and gestured toward the Capitol men. "This is the First Lieutenant of District 12."

"Sir," they both murmured simultaneously. Peeta nodded to them and gripped his and Katniss's bags.

"Could you gentlemen direct me to the Defense Building? I need to meet with the Minister of Defense."

"It's only fifteen minutes away by car, Lieutenant. We would be glad to escort you there."

"Thank you very much," he nodded. "Katniss, I will see you when I am finished with my meeting, yes?" She nodded nervously, glancing sideways at Thread. He wore a cold smile and Katniss wanted to ask Peeta how he was going to allow her to leave with him.

"Thank you for assisting my wife, Commander," Peeta bowed his head respectfully.

"Of course, Lieutenant. Your hotel address is on that paper I gave you." Peeta gripped the paper and tucked it into his shirt pocket.

"I'll see you soon," he kissed her forehead and handed her her suitcase. Her jaw dropped in confusion. He turned toward the Capitol peacekeepers and they asked him if they could help him with his bags. He didn't even glance back at her. She grew more and more panic-stricken as she watched him put his bags in the back of the car.

"Oh, Commander Thread! Lieutenant Mellark!" They all whirled around as Haymitch and Chaff strode toward them. Haymitch nodded to the peacekeepers and set his suitcase down.

"Did you have a pleasant trip, Victors Abernathy and Chaff," Thread asked in a low voice.

"President Snow's generous hospitality never ceases to amaze me," Haymitch said with a smile. "We are just on our way to our hotel. Are you staying near us, Commander?"

"I'm not," Thread said coldly, unable to hide his disgust. "The President always invites me to stay in his mansion."

"Oh I would hate to be such an imposition," Haymitch said, waving his hand. Thread looked confused, trying to figure out if Haymitch was taunting him or not. "Our assigned rooms are right next to the Mellarks. We would be happy to escort Mrs. Mellark so that you don't have to, Commander." Katniss's eyes widened and she turned back to Peeta. His expression hadn't changed but she could see the stiff way he held himself, his hands tight on the car door.

She exhaled and gripped her suitcase.

"That's kind of you, Mr. Abernathy, thank you. Commander, I would hate to be a bother so I'll just go with them."

"That's a wonderful idea," Peeta nodded. "Thank you for the offer, Haymitch. Commander, I will see you at the party then?"

"Yes," he said, looking displeased. "I expect I will see you all there."

"See you tonight, Katniss." Her eyes met his and he gave her a small smile. Her heart raced as she gave him a little nod and watched him climb into the car.

"This way, Mrs. Mellark," Haymitch gestured toward the next waiting car.

"Thank you for the offer, Commander Thread. Have a good day." Thread nodded stiffly as Chaff helped her load her bag into the car and she sat between the two Victors. She actually felt them deflate as the car pulled out of the station and drove away.

"Thank you," she muttered in a low voice. She didn't know if either of the men had heard her and she kept her eyes straight ahead.

* * *

Chaff's room was on a different floor but Haymitch's was in fact three doors down from Katniss's and Peeta's. The bellman unlocked the door and set her suitcase down in the entryway.

"Will you be requiring anything else, ma'am?"

"No, thank you." He bowed low and closed the door behind him. She opened it again and popped her head out. The bellman was helping Haymitch with his door key and Haymitch grumbled that he could do it himself. The bellman hurried off and Haymitch kicked the door open.

"Haymitch," she called. He paused, his brow raised.

"Thank you," she said again.

"Take care of yourself, Mrs. Mellark," he said with a solemn nod. She swallowed as she closed the door and locked both locks. She sighed as she picked up her bag and went to inspect their room.

It was more of a suite than anything else and Katniss was dumbfounded by the size. There was a kitchen, a bathroom, and a little dining area. There was also a little bench in the window big enough for her to sit on.

She loathed it. This hotel room was bigger than her house back in the Seam. She wished she had asked if Prim could come along. Then again, she would never want Prim to be so close to the monster who ruled over the country. She chewed her lip nervously, wondering when Peeta would return.

Deciding she needed to do something to keep from going insane, she wandered into the bathroom and her eyes widened. Peeta had told her about the luxurious tubs he had seen in 2 but she had never seen one before. This one took up nearly all of the space of the bathroom. The faucets were gold and the shelves were stocked with dozens of small bottles. She bent over to turn the faucet and watched the water pour into the tub. She frowned as the water disappeared down the drain and she searched for a way to keep the water in. She pushed and pulled until finally the water seemed to fill up the tub. She flicked the bottles open and sniffed gingerly, gagging at the strong scents.

"Oh god that's awful," she shook her head, putting the bottles back. Many had the strong scent of roses and other fragrant flowers. She liked the lavender scent and set it aside. She found a green one that smelled sort of like the herbs her mother used. She poured a tiny bit of the purple in and watched it swirl around the water. She quickly pushed her clothes off and stepped into the tub. Her eyes widened as she slid into the hot water and leaned against the wall.

"Peeta's right. We need this at home," she muttered to herself. But her head shot up and she scowled. Do not get used to this kind of luxury, she scolded. Not when your little sister is bathing in a bucket with cold water.

The warmth and the pleasant fragrances caused her irritation and her worries to melt away. She closed her eyes and leaned against the wall, her legs stretched out in front of her. She shifted and slipped, grabbing onto the shelf for support. The bottles all tipped over and spilled into the water and she gasped.

"Damn it!" The heavy scent of roses lingered in the air and she wrinkled her nose.

"Ugh, whatever," she closed her eyes and leaned her head against the rest again, waving her hands through the water.

* * *

She had no idea how long she had stayed in the bath but she heard the door open and Peeta calling her name.

"In the bathroom," she called back, then she realized she had left the door standing wide open. Peeta appeared in the doorway and his eyes widened.

"H-hey." His eyes traveled over her body before flying back to her face. Her face reddened as she realized he could clearly see all of her on display.

"Hi," she sat up and tucked her legs in, hiding herself. "Um, I wasn't sure when you would be back so I thought I would take a bath."

"Yeah, I can see that," he smiled. "What do you think?"

"It's really great. Except for the scents."

"Yeah, you used a lot of that stuff," he made a face.

"Not on purpose! It all tipped over and spilled. I think a pound of rose wash got in here with me." He chuckled softly.

"I'll let you finish up. It's almost dinner time, are you hungry?"

"I must have been in this bath longer than I thought."

"I've been gone several hours. You didn't fall asleep in there did you?" She bit her lip, realizing she had.

"First rule of bathtubs. You can't fall asleep. Why don't you dry off and I will order some room service?"

"Ok." He nodded and pulled the door closed, leaving her to step out of the tub and dry herself off. She sniffed her arm and grimaced. She guessed she would just have to take another bath tomorrow and scrub the stuff off. She wrapped the towel around her body and peered out. Peeta's back was to her as he was unpacking his suitcase. She spotted her bag on the shelf and tried to reach it. Her fingertips grazed it and it tipped over onto the floor. She let out a loud huff and Peeta turned around.

"What are you doing," he laughed, bending to retrieve the bag.

"I forgot to take clothes in there with me," she gripped the edge of the towel to her body. He looked bemused.

"Katniss, it's not as if… I mean, you don't have to be shy. We've seen each other plenty of times."

"I know that, I just feel… more exposed here." She shrugged as his bemused look deepened. "Never mind. I'll just change in here. Be out in a minute." She closed the door and Peeta shook his head as he went back to unpacking. She came back out a few minutes later, braiding her hair to the side.

"Did you find out where they took Darius and Rosalie?"

"They said Rosalie has a room here in the hotel so I think Haymitch is going to check on her. As for Darius, he's been transported to the medical facility down the street. Thread ordered the maximum amount of medical care that he can receive. Hopefully we can go see him tomorrow."

"Poor Rosie," she shook her head.

"There's not much we can do right now, Katniss. We will find out who attacked him, though. They won't get away with it." She nodded and finished the braid, sitting on the bed with her legs crossed.

"So what would you like to do for dinner? We can go out, if you'd like to see the Capitol. We can have dinner with Haymitch and some of the other Victors down in the lobby. Or we can order room service and stay up here. Your choice."

"What do you want to do?"

"It doesn't matter to me, Katniss. Whatever you're comfortable with."

"I guess we should go eat with the Victors."

"But that's not what you want to do." Her eyes flew up to meet his and she saw nothing but patience and understanding.

"Ok. Can we just stay up here? Is that alright?"

"Of course it's alright. Here, find something you like from this menu." Her eyes widened at the choices.

"They just...bring this stuff to our room?"

"I barely left my room last time I was here, I was so enraptured by this service," he joked. "I'm going to change while you pick some food." He kissed her head as he passed and she sat on the bed, crossing her legs and staring intently at the menu. She heard a knock at the door and she glanced at the closed bathroom door.

"Peeta, someone's at the door."

"I'm a little...ah, would you answer it please? It's likely Haymitch." She moved toward the door warily and pulled it open. Haymitch and Chaff were on the other side and Chaff smiled.

"Well good evening, gorgeous. We were hoping you would join us for dinner."

"Take the flirting down a notch, Chaff," Haymitch shook his head. "We were hoping you and your husband would join us, Katniss."

"Um, Peeta mentioned just ordering room service. He's in the bathroom at the moment."

"Drinks then. You can join us after you are finished eating." Haymitch didn't wait for her to respond and Katniss had a feeling it wasn't a request. She watched as he and Chaff headed down the hall and toward the elevator. She swallowed as she closed the door. She sat back on the bed and studied the menu.

"Who was at the door," Peeta asked as he came out, wearing soft grey pants and a white tank that made Katniss's eyes lock on his arms.

"Haymitch and Chaff. They invited us for dinner but they said we could join them for drinks after we eat."

"Since neither of us drink, I think we can skip that," he said with a smile as he picked up the menu.

"I don't think he was really giving us a choice," she said softly.

"We will see him tomorrow. It's not a big deal. Ooh, I love these little dumpling things. I had them on my last visit here. Did you figure out what you want?"

"I think so." She pointed to one thing and he frowned.

"Katniss, I know you're hungrier than that. Please order whatever you want."

"That will be fine with me." He sighed and went to place the order. When he came back, she had changed into a threadbare gown to sleep in and was sitting on the bench in the window. He sat on the edge and she pulled her knees to her chest to make room for him.

"Food will be here soon. Are you ok?"

"I can't get over how big and colorful everything is," she shook her head.

"It takes some getting used to. I can take you exploring tomorrow if you like. Some parts of it are really pretty." She didn't say anything and he studied her night gown.

"Maybe we can go shopping while we are here. I'd love to get you some pretty things to wear."

"I don't need pretty things," she shook her head.

"Ok but this thing...it's falling apart. I have money, Katniss. I told you, I'd like to spend it on you."

"As long as you buy some things for yourself too," she said sternly. He grinned and nodded. She pressed her forehead to the glass and Peeta studied her reflection.

"Katniss, about earlier…" She glanced at him quickly before her eyes flew back to the window. "I meant what I said. I never did anything with Johanna Mason."

"Ok." He cupped her chin and turned her toward him. Their gazes locked, he smiled as he pushed a lock of hair behind her ear.

"I didn't know if I would make it back to 12. I had no idea if I would ever see you again. But I never stopped dreaming of you. Of kissing you, holding you, hearing my name on your lips. I never wanted any of it with anyone else. That's why I paid no attention to Johanna."

"I'm sure she put the idea into your head."

"I don't even remember what was said between us to be honest. All I know is that I was always thinking of you." She sighed and leaned her head against the window.

"What is happening to me, Peeta?" His brow furrowed.

"What do you-"

"Why do I get upset so easily? This hasn't happened before. Why now?" Peeta tried not to smile.

"I'm no expert but I'd say you get upset because you're jealous." She scowled and he choked back his laughter.

"I know. There's absolutely nothing to be jealous of. But can you think of any other reason?"

"Maybe you just annoy me."

"Nah, I don't think that's it. I think you like me more than you want to admit. And it burns you up when you think I've done something with another girl. Something that should be reserved just for you." Katniss rolled her eyes.

"What kind of something?"

"Like… this?" He bent low to blow softly in her ear and she gasped as his tongue raked along her lobe.

"Or maybe this," he said in a husky whisper, his hand moving to her knee and gently sliding up her thigh. She started to squirm, huffing when he chuckled lightly.

"You don't have to worry, love. You're the only one I'm thinking about when I have my hand wrapped around my cock." She gasped and fell forward but his strong chest supported her. She wondered if it was possible to cum just from the sound of his voice.

One of his hands squeezed her breast through her gown while the other moved to cup her through her underwear.

"Oh shit, you're so wet. And I haven't even touched you."

"Peeta."

"Yes, my love. Your body is the only one I dream of touching and kissing and making love to. No one else. You own every part of me, Katniss. I told you, I'm completely and utterly yours." He rubbed her through her panties and was on the verge of moving them to the side when there was a knock at the door. She fell forward, groaning in frustration and he chuckled as he kissed her hair.

"Later," he promised.

"I'm getting sick of getting interrupted by the damn door." He laughed and gave her a quick kiss before jumping up to answer the door. She tried to make herself presentable as the man pushed the food cart in. Peeta nodded as he lifted the lids off the food.

"It all smells great, thank you." The man nodded but Katniss could tell he was holding his jaw differently, a little stiffly actually. The man opened his hands and Peeta swallowed.

"No sir, I think this will be fine for right now. I'll call the desk if we require anything else." The man bowed low and let himself out of the room. Peeta's hand rested on the door for a moment, his breathing heavy.

"Peeta?" He turned and found her just inches away. He wrapped his arms around her, his chin resting on her head.

"Was he-" her voice was muffled but he winced and pulled away.

"An Avox," he finished for her. "They're servants here in the Capitol." She swallowed and he cleared his throat, moving to the tray of food. "Here, help yourself."

"Are you really going to eat all of that?" Her wide eyes traveled over the steaming dishes.

"Well I was hoping you would help me. My eyes were bigger than my stomach, I suppose." Katniss was no fool; she knew he had ordered more on purpose. But she shook her head and grabbed her plate, scooping a little bit of everything to try. Peeta hid his grin as he helped himself to the food and followed her to the dining area. They ate quietly, her eyes trained on the table and Peeta's eyes on her.

"Don't fill up. I ordered dessert too."

"Ugh, I don't know if I can eat another bite."

"Here. Just one bite." He held up a spoonful of a blue concoction with a yellow dollop or something. She closed her eyes as the sugar attacked her taste buds and she licked her lips.

"Wow. What is that?"

"Blueberry cream cheese mousse with passion fruit and whipped cream. One more bite," he asked with a knowing smile.

Katniss devoured the entire dessert. Peeta didn't mind in the slightest but she still stammered an apology.

"I ordered it for you," he assured her. "I want to completely spoil you, Katniss. I told you that when I showed you the contract." Had that only been a few weeks ago? When he turned away, she used her finger to clean the plate.

"So, um, how did your meeting with the Minister of Defense go?" Peeta's lips tightened.

"Minister Antonius was too busy to see me."

"What? But he sent for you!"

"I waited around for an hour and a half. The Head Gamemaker showed me around a bit but I was told to come back tomorrow."

"That's rude."

"That's the Capitol, love." He smiled as he smoothed out the lines between her brow.

"It's getting late. Shall we head to bed?"

"Ok." He covered the remaining dishes and set them aside before pushing the cart into the hall. Katniss was settled under the covers when Peeta stopped beside the bed. She couldn't see the expression on his face but his eyes reflected the bright moon. He pulled his shirt over his head and crawled onto the bed, giving her a sly smile. She bit her lip as she sank into the pillows, her hands over her head.

"So where were we earlier?"

"You were...oh!" Her hips jerked as he sucked at her throat. He cupped her breast with his palm and he moved his lips to the edge of the gown.

"I was what? Oh yeah… I was about to bury my tongue deep in your pussy." She released an aroused little squeak as he kneed her thighs apart. His warm breath on her belly made her moan and she arched her back as he rubbed his thumb over her panties.

"God I need to see you, Katniss." He pulled her panties down and sat back on his haunches. She twisted on her side, feeling far too exposed for her liking and his hand moved from her breast down to grip her hip. His hair tickled her pelvis as he lowered his head and she closed her eyes, her head tilting back. Suddenly her eyes flew open and her hand flew to his hair.

"Stop!" His head shot up, his eyes wide and anxious.

"What's the matter? Did I hurt you?"

"No, no, you didn't. It's just…" she couldn't explain the strange feeling that they were being watched. She knew it wasn't logical but she felt her skin crawl and wanted to burrow under the blankets.

"I'm sorry. I'm just… I don't feel so good. Maybe all that rich food."

"Can I get you anything? Do anything for you?" She smiled at his innate goodness and rubbed his lip with her thumb.

"I'll be fine. Let's just get some sleep." He didn't look convinced but he handed her her underwear and waited for her to get situated before he pulled the covers over the both of them. She noticed he had twisted his lower half away from her and she felt a pang of guilt. He kissed her temple and she rested her cheek on his chest.

"Sleep well, my love." She drifted off to his loving caresses and hoped his arms would ward off the nightmares.

* * *

Of course the odds had never been in her favor. She dreamed of her father; at first it started out as a pleasant dream. He had taken her to the lake and he was pointing to a bunch of katniss roots in the water.

"See that, little Katkin? Katniss roots. As long as you can find yourself-"

"You'll never starve," she finished his sentence with a smile. "I know, Daddy. You've told me a hundred times."

"And do you remember everything else I have taught you about edible plants? About hunting? And fishing?"

"Yes Daddy, I remember. Why do you look so worried?" He forced his face into a smile and shook his head.

"I just want you to be prepared, Katkin. Just in case anything ever happens."

"What could happen, Daddy? You're scaring me."

"Not to worry, my flower. Daddy just worries about you and Primmy and Mommy."

"You're not going to leave us, right Daddy?" Her stormy eyes were wide and terrified and Ash Everdeen felt like an arrow had pierced his heart. For the first time in his life, he lied to his precious daughter.

"Of course not, Katniss. I'll never leave you. I promise."

Suddenly, there was a loud explosion and Katniss turned away, squeezing her eyes shut. When she opened them again, her father was missing.

"Daddy?" She looked around but he was nowhere to be seen.

"Daddy! Daddy, come back!"

* * *

"Daddy! Daddy, come back, please!" She felt tears stream down her cheeks but a warm hand cupped her face and she vaguely registered soothing words in her ear.

"It's alright. Katniss, wake up, you're having a nightmare! It's alright. You're alright." Her eyes shot open and she saw Peeta leaning over her, his face twisted with worry.

"There you are," he pulled her into his arms and smoothed out her hair.

"I've got you. You're safe," he kept saying as he rocked her back and forth.

"He promised," she sobbed into his bare chest. He started at her cries, bending to kiss the top of her head.

"Who promised what?"

"My dad...he promised he would never leave me. He left me, Peeta. He left us and I had to take care of my family all by myself! He left when we needed him!"

"I know. Sweetheart, I know," he rested his cheek against her hair and closed his eyes as he listened to her loud sobs. He didn't know how else to help her except to let her cry. He left sweet kisses on her head and temple but other than that, he didn't say anything and let her cry until she fell right back to sleep. Peeta gently pulled the covers over her and wrapped her in his arms. His face was inches from hers, their noses touching and every time his eyes started to close, they snapped open again to make sure she was still safe and peaceful. Finally he couldn't hold them open any longer and he tightened his hold on her as he joined her in sleep.

* * *

They woke up just like that. Peeta was shocked they hadn't moved but her lashes tickled his cheek as she started to wake and he smiled, a little dazed.

"Good morning."

"Mmm. Morning." Her stomach growled loudly and he started.

"Was that your stomach?"

"It's lying," she shook her head. "No way I can be hungry after all that we ate last night."

"Your body is playing catch up," he said seriously. "Let me order some breakfast for us." She allowed him to unwrap his arms from around her so he could jog over to the phone. He placed the order and moved the curtains aside, peering out.

"It's actually a beautiful day. I need to find out what time I should be at the Defense Building but other than that, I'd like to spend the day with you."

"I wasn't really thinking of going anywhere without you."

They ate their breakfast in silence. Although the eggs and sausage and pancakes were delicious, she ate with a furrowed brow. He pushed the trays aside and reached for her hand.

"Are you alright?"

"Yes. I'm sorry that I woke you last night."

"Don't be. If I can help you escape from a nightmare, I'll gladly do it. Do you have those often?"

"Lately, they come every night. I don't know what they mean."

"Perhaps your father is trying to tell you something." She frowned at him.

"Like what?"

"I'm not sure but you can't dwell on it or you'll go crazy. Let's get dressed and we will get out of this room for awhile." She wasn't overly thrilled about exploring the Capitol but she did want to leave the room so she nodded and hurried into the bathroom to change clothes. Peeta quickly dialed the Defense Building and was told Minister Antonius was in a meeting.

"General Duartyr is here, though," the man told him. "As well as Colonel Haemon." Peeta's blood ran cold and he almost dropped the phone.

"Commander…um, Colonel Haemon is here in the Capitol?"

"Yes, Lieutenant Mellark. Would you like to speak to one of them?"

"If General Duartyr is available I would like to speak to him."

"Certainly, sir. One moment." Peeta waited, glancing back at the bathroom's closed door.

"Good morning Lieutenant Mellark," a cheery voice greeted him.

"General Duartyr. How are you today?"

"Doing fine, Peeta, doing fine. How are you? Is the Mrs with you?"

"Yes sir. We checked into our room yesterday afternoon."

"Good, good. And how is she finding the Capitol?"

"We actually stayed in our room for dinner last night. We discussed doing a little exploring and shopping today but I understand the Minister would like to speak to me and I wasn't sure what time he is available."

"Ah, Minister Antonius is in meetings all day. I'm just about to go into a meeting with him and the Head Gamemaker as well as a few of the Colonels from 1 and 2."

"Yes, um...I understand that Colonel Haemon is here. Do pass on my congratulations...when you see him."

"Rest assured, Peeta, he hasn't asked about you. I'm not sure if he even knows that you are here. I will do my best to keep him ignorant."

"I appreciate that, General."

"Peeta, remember what I told you. Things are happening and they could mean very good things for you and your family, or very bad things."

"Obviously I am hoping for the first one, General."

"You and me both. Tonight's party is important. You and your wife need to make an impression."

"Tonight's party? I thought Miss Snow's birthday was not until later in the week."

"You're correct. Tonight, President Snow has invited an elite crowd to his mansion to watch a performance and just mingle. It has nothing to do with Miss Snow. The President has asked to meet your wife at tonight's event." Peeta swallowed and noticed his palms had grown rather damp.

"Of course, sir. We are looking forward to it."

"Take your wife to the boutique on 5th. Do your best to fit in. And if you find yourself in trouble, know that you do have friends around you."

"Sir?" He frowned into the phone.

"I must go. I look forward to seeing you again, Lieutenant. And to meeting your wife."

"Thank you, General. Good bye." He stared at the phone and nearly jumped out of his skin as soft hands touched his shoulders.

"I'm sorry," she stammered as his hand covered his heart.

"It's fine, it's just… my god, you're silent. It's like you just walk on air."

"And you have the loudest footsteps I've ever heard," she smiled. "How did you pass your training with that lack of stealth?"

"I made up for it in other areas," he said quietly, his face somber. Her smile fell and she mentally kicked herself for mentioning it.

"Is everything ok? You look really pale."

"I'm fine. I'm going to change and then we can get out of here. There is a party at the Presidential Mansion tonight and we need to find something to wear for it."

"Another party? Do they just party all day in the Capitol?"

"Feasts and masquerades and luncheons. It's a life of luxury here, Katniss."

"It's despicable," she said under her breath as he passed. He squeezed her hand and headed into the bathroom to get ready.

* * *

They were walking hand in hand past the front desk when they heard someone clear their throat. Haymitch approached them, his hand wrapped around a brandy glass.

"Good morning Lieutenant. Mrs. Mellark."

"Good morning, Haymitch."

"We were disappointed that we missed you last night." His eyes narrowed.

"Katniss wasn't feeling too well after dinner so we went to bed early. I hope we can catch you another time."

"Ki- Lieutenant Mellark, mind if I have a word with you? In private?" Peeta glanced at Katniss and nodded.

"I'll be right back." She nodded and watched them round the corner. Katniss glanced around then followed them down the hall until she was pressed to the wall outside a tiny room.

"You can't follow simple instructions can you?" She was shocked at Haymitch's tone and how he was speaking to a Peacekeeper.

"She didn't want to leave the room and I didn't want to push her! What is your problem?"

"My problem is that we didn't have time to inspect your room! It's probably bugged. So I hope to high heaven that you two haven't been talking about anything dangerous! I can't believe you told her everything in the first place."

"She knows only the slightest details, Haymitch, so calm down. You really think Snow would have my room bugged?"

"You're a fool if you think he wouldn't. For god sakes, Peeta, you're like a little Capitol lapdog right now!"

"You're the one who put me on the leash," her husband snarled. "Maybe you overestimate me! I don't even know if I can convince them I'm still a loyalist."

"I know you can. I haven't overestimated anyone! Except maybe Finn. That boy is so wrapped around her finger that he can't see past his nose. I don't know how much help he will actually be."

"I told you before, Haymitch, I won't do anything that puts Katniss in danger."

"Kid, Katniss is already in danger! She was in danger the moment Thread found out her name!"

"What does that m-"

"And to make things worse, I can't find Rosalie." Katniss's hand clapped over her mouth.

"What do you mean you can't find her?"

"Just that! She isn't registered in this hotel. I don't have clearance to call the medical facility and ask about Darius. I already risked a lot by poking around the front desk, asking about Rosalie."

"I'll call the facility and ask them where they are."

"Do not call attention to yourself, Peeta. Thread is already watching you closely. You saw how pissed he was when he saw me on the train. I don't think he expected to be surrounded by Victors. But we got lucky that we were able to add you to the passenger list at the last minute. Thread wasn't expecting that."

"He's clever, Haymitch. And his wrath will be unspeakable if he finds out."

"We'll keep your girl out of harm's way. You've heard about tonight?"

"He said Snow wants to meet her tonight. He told me to take her to the boutique and make sure we blend in."

"Take this card. Tell her I sent you and I need a favor. I know your Seam girl will hate it but she needs to fit in."

"The whole charade?"

"Down to the last golden tattoo on her face. We don't need to give them any reason to question where she is from."

"You said to keep her name out of it. Why?"

"Don't worry about that. Just focus on being a real Capitol couple for a few nights and then you can go back to 12 together."

"I'm from 12 too, Haymitch. Why do you think I don't need the extra help?"

"You've always been so reliably good, Peeta," she heard Haymitch reply, his voice much softer. "So smart about how you present yourself. I didn't want to disrupt that."

"As I said before, I think you've overestimated me."

"I haven't. We should go. Your wife will be suspicious."

"Can you please try not to irritate her so much? I'd like for her to like you."

"Her scowl reminds me of him. It's like seeing my best friend alive again." Katniss's eyes widened and she just barely came to in enough time to duck around the corner before Peeta and Haymitch strode out. Her breathing was heavy and she leaned back against the wall. She knew Peeta would be looking for her and she frowned, glancing this way and that. She rounded another corner and straightened her clothes, patting her hair down, and making sure she looked as normal as she possibly could.

Peeta's brow raised when she entered the lobby and he hurried toward her.

"I wasn't sure where you had gone."

"Sorry, I had to use the bathroom while you were talking."

"Ok. Are you ready?" She nodded as he steered her out of the hotel, his hand placed firmly at the small of her back.

He helped her into the back of a black car, then climbed in beside her.

"The Boutique on 5th, please," he told the driver. He grasped her hand and stared out the window. Katniss's mind was spinning but she knew it was no place to talk so she pretended to be fascinated with the sights of the Capitol.

* * *

The car stopped in front of a building that looked like another hotel. Peeta thanked the driver and passed him some money before getting out and offering his hand. Katniss stared up at the golden building with wide eyes. Peeta smiled at her expression and held the door open for her. It seemed to be bigger on the inside. She couldn't help craning her neck as she twisted around, trying to see everything at once.

"Come on," he muttered, his hand on her back once again. She heard him speaking to a woman, asking for someone, but didn't pay any attention until he gently nudged her.

"Katniss Mellark, this is Elena Trinkett."

"Ellie, please," the young woman laughed. "And you must be the First Lieutenant I have heard so much about. My sister complains about the lack of man-candy in 12 but she says you are the exception." Peeta blushed and laughed good-naturedly.

"My wife, Katniss," he gestured to his wife who finally looked at the Capitol woman. She looked much like her sister, with the same garish hair and make-up and long fingernails that reminded Katniss more of talons.

"It's so nice to meet you, Katniss," Ellie squealed. "Are you here for the Presidential Party tonight?"

"We should probably find something for Miss Snow's birthday festivities this week as well."

"Oh of course. Portia, why don't you assist Lieutenant Mellark? Katniss, let me take you to my number one stylist. You will adore him!"

"Oh but-" She glanced over her shoulder as she was dragged away from Peeta.

"It's ok, I'll be right out here when you're finished," he said a reassuring tone. She bit her lip but nodded and allowed the young woman to steer her across the boutique.

Ellie was talking but something was wrong with Katniss's ears because everything just sounded fuzzy. She noticed when they stopped and she saw a tall man turn away from a rack of dresses. It struck her how normal he looked. Compared to the rest of the Capitol people she had seen, he looked like he could have come from the Districts. He wore only a little amount of makeup, his eyes lined with gold. His suit was stylish and he had a warm smile.

"Katniss, this is my favorite stylist here at Capitol Boutique! He's been a stylist for Hunger Games tributes, the most elite fashion stars, even Victors! Everyone who's everyone is wearing him."

"Well not everyone," he said with a smile and a wink. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Katniss. I'm Cinna."


	28. Chapter 28

Katniss shook the man's hand, her jaw stiff.

"Cinna, Katniss is married to the First Lieutenant of District 12! Haymitch has asked for us to step in and assist."

"Of course," Cinna nodded, his voice soft and pleasant. "I'll take it from here, Ellie."

"I'll check on you in a little while. Don't hesitate to inform us if you need anything." Ellie waved and flounced away, leaving Katniss alone with Cinna.

"You can relax," he smiled. "Fashion is supposed to be fun."

"I haven't had much experience with fun," she mumbled before she realized she probably should keep her mouth shut.

"Mmm," he nodded in understanding, although how could he possibly understand? "Well let's try it just for today. You're attending the party tonight?" She nodded.

"And Aurelia Snow's birthday this week?" She nodded again.

"Let's find you an outfit for the birthday party and then we will focus on tonight. How does that sound?" She shrugged, unsure of what else she was supposed to say.

Cinna only smiled and offered her his hand.

"Come with me." She followed him to the back of the store, into a room that looked to be made up of dresses.

"Usually I would prefer to design something made just for you, but I'm afraid we don't have that kind of time. Anything you see here can be altered to fit you perfectly. Why don't you have a look around?"

"I don't really know where to start," she shook her head.

"Katniss," she jumped as he took her hand in his own. His hands were soft, softer than any man's she had encountered. Then again she had only touched Peeta's and Gale's hands and they were hard workers. Her father had been the hardest worker she knew. What did this Capitol man know of hard work?

"If Haymitch has asked for us to assist you then that means it is important. He doesn't make that request often. Not even for his own tributes."

"Probably because he knows their deaths are inevitable," she spat. He raised his brow, looking mildly surprised at her outburst. Katniss yanked her hand away and crossed her arms.

"What chance does a tribute from 12 stand? So what does it matter what kind of impression they make when they get here? Does that sound about right?"

"District 12 has had 2 Victors, from what I recall," he said cooly.

"Oh whooptie doo! 2 Victors! And 150 deaths!"

"Have you lost someone to the Games?"

"That really isn't any of your business! But no."

"But you have lost someone," he pressed her. "Someone close to you."

"You don't… you don't know me. And this was a mistake. I'm just going to tell Peeta I will wear my dress from home. Thanks for your help." She turned on her heel and made to leave.

"You're in danger, Katniss." His words made her freeze but she didn't turn back to face him. He walked around to her front.

"Surely you know that. Haymitch wouldn't be asking for our help if you weren't. I don't know the details and I won't ask for them. I want to help you, though, if you will allow it. You just have to fit into the crowd while you are here." He folded his hands and cocked his head.

"How despicable we must seem to you." She frowned and her eyes darted to the floor.

"Oh I know you're thinking it. It's exactly what I thought when I was first brought to the Capitol." Her eyes flew up, wide with surprise.

"You assumed I was born here?"

"I thought everyone who lived in the Capitol was born here."

"Not always," he said delicately. "Though it's rare, it's not unheard of to find district people hidden amongst the Capitol elite. It does help to know someone."

"So that's what happened to you? You knew someone?"

"I was raised by my grandfather," he bowed his head. "And when he won the Hunger Games, he decided he wanted to raise me outside of District 8."

"District 8," she repeated, her eyes wide. "Textiles."

"I was holding a sewing needle before I learned to walk," he chuckled. "I loved clothes. I repaired Grandpa's and mine clothing and was soon designing outfits. When he won, he brought me here and stuffed me into the fancy clothes. He told me I had to blend in to survive. I've slowly worked my way up the social ladder."

"But you design clothes for tributes," she held out her hands as if pleading with him. "How can you stand it? When your grandfather went through that?"

"I figure it's the only way I can possibly help those kids. If I can help them make an impression, they might stand a chance at gaining sponsors." He sighed and looked around.

"Care to have a cup of tea with me?"

"Ok." He smiled and took her hand, leading her to a small room in the back. He closed the door and gestured for her to sit on the fluffy red couch. She watched, fascinated, as he pressed a button and two steaming cups of tea appeared.

"Are you hungry? I can order us some food."

"I already ate breakfast but thank you."

"You'll forgive me if I eat then?" He pressed another button and grabbed the muffin that appeared. "Go ahead. So...wait, your grandfather won the Games? But the Reaping age is 12 to 18."

"Oh the Presidents can change the rules whenever they want to. And it was a year when the tributes were chosen by their own district. My grandfather wasn't extremely popular, you see. But he showed them all when he won." Katniss stared at her cup. How awful it must be, to be sent to your death by your own friends and neighbors.

"Now," he brushed the crumbs off his shirt and shifted on the couch. "Will you let me help you?"

"You won't make me look like a fool?"

"We all look like fools, Katniss," he shook his head, a sad smile playing around his lips. "This is the Capitol. We paint our faces and pile on the jewels to keep us from thinking about anything that really matters."

"You'll help me? I mean, you'll teach me what to say and how to bow and everything?"

"I'll teach you everything I know," he brushed a strand of hair from her eyes. She would normally never let anyone but Peeta or her sister touch her like that but Cinna's eyes were so warm and caring that she found herself leaning into his touch.

"Then start your teaching."

* * *

Peeta glanced away from the mirror and cleared his throat. The young woman who knelt at his feet glanced up and bit her lip.

"Is something wrong? I didn't stick you, did I?"

"No, no, you're fine. I was just wondering if we are nearly finished. My stomach is growling and I think we have been at this for hours."

"Fashion takes time," she laughed. "But you're right, it is past my lunch break. Why don't you change into your clothes and follow me? You can tell me all about your district."

"But my wife-"

"She's with Cinna. He's probably talking her ear off," she waved as she stood and put the box of pins on the table. "Go on and change. I'll be right outside." Sighing, Peeta stepped out of his tailored slacks and grabbed his clothes. He changed quickly, setting everything on the table and smoothing it out.

"Come with me." He followed her to the back of the boutique, through lines and lines of dresses and his eyes widened as he passed it all. Was this what Katniss was enduring? His poor huntress was probably red with anger right about now.

When she pushed a door open and lead the way into a small room, he froze in place and his eyes widened. Katniss was sitting on the couch with another man, and

she was actually smiling!

"I told you he was talking her ear off," Portia smiled. "Cinna, this is Katniss's husband."

"It's such a pleasure," Cinna jumped to his feet and held out his hand. "I've heard so many wonderful things about you." Peeta glanced at Katniss before he shook Cinna's hand.

"It's way past lunch break," Portia closed the door. "Are you almost finished?"

"We haven't even chosen dresses," Cinna said, looking abashed. "We have just been talking."

"It's been hours, Cinna! You're useless."

"I did give him a hard time at first," Katniss admitted, shrugging. Cinna moved to the chair and gestured for Peeta to sit beside his wife.

"Well maybe we can go off of what Peeta has chosen. So they can match."

"That's a good idea," Portia nodded, pressing the button on the table. "Peeta, would you like some lunch?"

"Um," he glanced at Katniss again and she sat up. "Have you eaten, Katniss?"

"No and I could eat. Whatever you're having." Portia pressed the button a few times and plates started to appear.

"Looks like today's lunch is lamb stew," she said, passing the plates around.

"Is this alright? I mean, we don't want to keep you from taking an actual break," Peeta accepted the plate from Portia but Cinna waved his hand.

"We hardly get an actual break anyway. It's nice to talk to someone." Peeta didn't like the way Cinna smiled at his wife and REALLY didn't like the way she smiled back at him.

"Ok so what have you chosen for tonight," Cinna propped the plate on his lap.

"Gold," Portia said with a broad smile. "Which will look perfect on her! Put her in that little gold number that Cashmere wore for her welcome home party a few years ago!"

"I'm not sure if that outfit suits Katniss," Cinna's eyes traveled over Katniss. Portia frowned.

"What's wrong with it? She'll look beautiful in it!" He shrugged in response.

"We can look around. Did you choose something for the birthday party?"

"Peeta picked out a couple of good ones. There is a black one with red trim that I really like. He looks great in it. Makes his ass look delicious!" Katniss's eyes flashed while Peeta's face burned. Cinna snorted and shook his head.

"His wife is sitting right there."

"And she will definitely agree with me when she sees him in it," Portia shrugged, digging into her food. Peeta cleared his throat and took a bite of the stew. He glanced sideways at Katniss and raised his fork.

"It's better than the one we make back home."

"It's good," she nodded in agreement. "But it's really sweet."

"It's the plums," Cinna replied. "They use way too many and it sweetens the stew a little too much."

"Everything in the Capitol is sweet," Portia stated. Cinna nodded in agreement.

"So Peeta, tell me all about District 12! Is it as barbaric as people say?"

"Who says that," he asked softly, his eyes on his food.

"Oh all the Victors drone about how dreadful it is whenever they come into the boutique! It's nothing like the Capitol."

"That's true," Peeta nodded. "We have more trees than buildings."

"No shopping malls?" Portia shuddered. "I would die."

"Well not many of you have to worry about such things," Katniss said in a low voice. Peeta detected the bitterness in her tone.

"What? Dying? Everyone worries about dying! And even worse, aging! Getting old, ugh, can you imagine?" Katniss tried to keep her features as neutral as possible but she wanted to spit with disgust. In 12 it was rare to survive to old age. That's why the older people were usually well-respected and called upon for advice. Greasy Sae, the old woman who ran the trade stall at the Hob, was one of the oldest people Katniss knew and she looked up to the wizened old woman.

"I think our lunch break has been long enough. Let's get back to it, shall we?" Cinna set his plate down and stood up. Peeta and Katniss followed suit and Portia nodded.

"I'll do her hair and makeup once we finalize her outfit."

"Come on, Katniss. There are a few dresses you may like." Katniss took Cinna's outstretched hand, which Peeta did not miss, and she followed him back to the room of dresses.

"Ok, let's get back to your fitting," Portia tugged his arm.

"Actually, can we go with them? I'm curious to see what they pick out."

"If you're worried about Cinna and your wife, don't be," she giggled. "It's not going to happen."

"I wasn't- I didn't say- I'm just interested to see her outfit choices."

"Ok," she shrugged, gesturing toward the door. Peeta nodded and they hurried after Cinna and Katniss.

* * *

Hours later, Peeta was sitting in an uncomfortably tight suit made of black silk with deep gold lining. His hair had been styled and pushed back, with one streak dyed gold. His blue eyes were lined with gold and they had painted gold specks on his cheeks. Ellie had assigned her best makeup artists and hair stylists to Peeta and Katniss and they had been working on them all afternoon and evening. Peeta glanced at the pockewatch they had attached to his suit and he sighed. He hadn't seen his wife for hours. They were due at the Presidential mansion very soon. And he hadn't had a chance to speak to Haymitch or anyone else about tonight. He was feeling very anxious and his legs shook nervously.

The back doors finally opened and he jumped to his feet. He actually didn't recognize her immediately. Cinna and Ellie led the way, followed by a number of stylists, with Katniss trailing behind. Peeta's eyes widened as he took her in all in. They had transformed her into the sun.

Her gold gown floated around her as she walked and he could see the dress was completely backless. Her long hair was hidden by an intricate golden headpiece with dangerous-looking spikes on the end. Her neck had been painted gold and her olive skin was covered by white makeup and gold specks, like his own cheeks. They had even turned her eyes gold and used brilliant colors of oranges and golds and a hint of blue around her eyes. Peeta's artistic side appreciated the beauty of it all but he found himself missing his grey-eyed huntress.

Fit in like a normal Capitol couple, he had been told.

But he was afraid they had missed the point. He wanted them to blend in. They had made her stand completely out.

She walked stiffly and her lips were thin. Peeta took her hand and made to stroke her cheek.

"Don't you touch her," Portia shrieked. "That makeup job took three hours!"

"Sorry," he muttered, his hand dropping to his side. She squeezed his hand and shook her head, giving him a look like "I'm going to slaughter the lot of them". He smiled weakly and offered her his arm.

"A car is waiting to take you to the mansion. We will see you back in here tomorrow for Aurelia Snow's birthday party!"

"Thank you for all of your help, Ellie." Ellie nodded and patted his arm.

"It's our pleasure, Peeta! Have fun tonight!" Katniss seriously doubted that would ever happen.

* * *

The car pulled up to the front of the mansion and Peeta helped her out.

"Tell me I don't look as stupid as I feel," she muttered, barely moving her lips.

"You look radiant, Katniss." She sighed and he squeezed her hand.

"I'll be right by your side the entire time, ok?" She nodded and glanced up at the mansion. She faltered and his arm went around her waist.

"It's ok. I'm right here." She nodded again and allowed him to lead her inside.

* * *

Katniss was instantly overwhelmed by all of the frivolity before her. People were drinking and kissing and laughing. She had never seen anything like it before. Peeta kept a firm arm around her and held her as close as he could (she was briefly afraid that he would be impaled with her headdress).

"There you are, Lieutenant," someone called and Peeta stiffened.

"General Duartyr! It's a pleasure to see you again."

"And you! And this gorgeous specimen must be your wife! No wonder you couldn't wait to get back to 12," the general winked at Peeta. Peeta's cheeks went pink but Duartyr laughed good-naturedly and pulled her hand to his lips.

"I'm charmed to make your acquaintance, Mrs. Mellark."

"I'm delighted to meet you, General Duartyr. My husband has told me wonderful things about you." Peeta's brow quirked at Katniss's respectful tone.

"Don't believe them all, Mrs. Mellark!" Duartyr nudged Peeta.

"Oh but he underspoke your handsome physique, sir," she purred. Duartyr laughed.

"By god, Peeta, you hit the jackpot!"

"Don't I know it, General," Peeta said with a smile, his eyes searching Katniss's. It was strange to see anything other than sormy grey. It was almost as if someone else was staring up at him. With a sly smile, almost flirty, and all of the makeup, he actually thought Ellie had done something with his wife and had placed this Capitol woman in his arms instead. If he hadn't been watching her most of his life, he would have said that exact thing had happened. But he saw through the fake smile, the confident bravado she displayed, and the girlish giggle she emitted on cue. He would never bring her back here if he could help it, he decided. Katniss was everything a Capitolite wasn't and he hated to see her acting the part.

He had lost the conversation between his general and his wife until he felt her fingers on his arm.

"I'm sorry, what was that," he blinked.

"I was trying to convince your wife to relocate to District 2. We could use you back in our ranks and I imagine she would quite love the mountains."

"As much as I would love to return to 2, Katniss has a sick mother and a little sister that she cares for. I couldn't possibly pull her away from her family." Katniss shot a quick glance his way but lowered her eyes again.

"I'm sorry to hear that, Mrs. Mellark. I hope one day in the future you might reconsider." Duartyr stiffened slightly and before Peeta could ask if he was alright, he felt someone else join them.

"It's good to see you again, General Duartyr. Congratulations on your promotion."

"Thank you very much indeed, Commander Thread," Duartyr held up his glass. "I was just congratulating Lieutenant Mellark on his nuptials. And trying to convince the scallywag to rejoin our ranks."

"Mm, yes. You should have your husband bring you for a visit soon, Mrs. Mellark. I'm sure he would love to show you where he was based and the sites of his training." Peeta tried to hide his wince. That was the last thing he would like to do.

"I would be honored," she bowed her head. "This is my first time out of District 12. I am eager to see more of Panem."

"Well perhaps we should have a word with President Snow about that." Peeta's brow furrowed.

"Sir?"

"Oh I just mean, the President often allows Peacekeepers to accompany Victors on their Victory Tours. Surely he wouldn't mind if you and your lovely life joined this year's Victor. He is from District 1, you know. A distant cousin of mine."

"Well congratulations, Commander," Duartyr said jovially. "You must be very proud."

"Indeed. More honor for the family name. In fact I think I see him across the room. Won't you all excuse me?" He nodded to Katniss and strode away. Duartyr cleared his throat and took a sip from his glass.

"Well, I will let you two enjoy the party. It was a pleasure to meet you at last, Mrs. Mellark." She swept into a perfect curtsy and Peeta had to admit he was impressed. Duartyr kissed her hand, clapped him on the shoulder, and left them to refill his glass.

"Let's go get a drink-" he stopped when a group of people stepped in front of him.

"There you are, Lieutenant, we've been looking for you."

"Mr. Abernathy," Peeta nodded.

"You look ravishing, Mrs. Mellark."

"Thank you, Mr. Abernathy," she said quietly, inclining her head.

"Lieutenant, you remember Mr. Odair and Miss Mason?"

"Of course. It's a pleasure to see you both again."

"Likewise," the Victor from District 4 said with a cheeky grin. "And who is this stunning creature?"

"This is my wife, Katniss. Katniss, this is Finnick Odair of District 4."

"Charmed, My Lady," he bowed low and kissed her hand, giving her a flirty wink. Katniss longed to wipe her hand on her dress but she gave him a playful smile.

"Mr. Odair, I'm such a fan."

"And I'm already a fan of yours, Mrs. Mellark. Pray tell, how did a Peacekeeper from District 12 steal the heart of such a work of art?"

"We were childhood sweethearts," she giggled. "It just took him forever to ask me to marry him."

"Funny, he never even mentioned you the last time he was here," the young woman said with a sneer. Peeta swallowed.

"Miss Mason, a delight to see you again."

"It could be, Lieutenant, if you arrived alone as you did last time." Katniss's eyes flashed and Peeta saw her clench her fists.

"Lieutenant, you and your wife are assigned seats next to us at the table," Haymitch said, casting Johanna Mason an amused look. "Would you care to join us?"

"We would be delighted, Mr. Abernathy, thank you." Haymitch lead the way while Finnick Odair escorted Johanna Mason, and Peeta tucked his hand into Katniss's.

"Abernathy!"

"Hello Gloss," Haymitch said in a falsely cheerful voice. "Congratulations, by the way." Katniss knew the Victor from past interviews. Cashmere and Gloss, winners of consecutive Hunger Games and apparently, considered to be favorites in the Capitol. The man's handsome physique was ruined by his cold smirk and his cruel

eyes.

"Yes, thank you. Sterling certainly did a number on your tributes, didn't he?" Haymitch's jaw twitched.

"Least my boy made it to the top 5 this year. It's been years since that's happened." Katniss felt her stomach roil. The Hunger Games was unfortunately required viewing and she'd had to look away when fourteen year old Davy Hynx was massacred by the four remaining tributes. She hadn't been able to look Davy's mother or sister in the eye the next day.

"What was with that girl of yours this year, Gloss," Johanna Mason scoffed. "Seemed like she had a diamond for a brain and not a very large one at that. How on earth did she get to keep that diamond ring she kept mooning over?"

"It was her token," Gloss snarled. "She was engaged to be married. Show some respect, Johanna."

"Oh I'll show you respect. The same kind of respect your little brat showed my girl when she was using the bathroom! No class whatsoever, Gloss. I'd at least hope for a little more dignity for our tributes than that."

"Gloss, where is that lovely sister of yours," Finnick Odair interrupted before the tirade could continue.

"She's around here somewhere, conversing with Caius Snow. He's become very fond of her, it seems." He said this to brag but Johanna and Finnick both winced.

"Well I do hope we see her later. Excuse us, Gloss." Finnick steered Johanna off and the others followed them.

"One of these days I'm going to-"

"Shush," Finnick whispered in her ear. "Just calm down."

"Don't tell me to calm down, Finnick, just-"

"Stop it," Haymitch leaned over and pretended to be re-adjusting her gown. Katniss frowned at the exchange and glanced up at Peeta but saw he was keeping his eyes straight ahead and had not seemed to notice anything out of the ordinary.

Haymitch lead the way to the grand table in the next room and he hurriedly gestured for Peeta and Katniss to sit down. They understood why a few moments later.

Peeta jumped to his feet as another man stalked toward them. Katniss was surprised at the change in her husband's demeanor. He was nervous, she could tell, and he fought to keep the smile on his face.

"Minister," Peeta called out. Katniss's eyes widened as she realized who this was. Minister Antonius, High Minister of Defense and Security of Panem. The Minister shook Peeta's hand and fixed his eyes on Katniss. She felt a chill run through her as Peeta's hands rested on her shoulders.

"Minister, this is my wife, Katniss Mellark."

"Charmed, Mrs. Mellark. Commander Thread tells me your mother is quite the Healer. She managed to comfort our own Peacekeeper Murphy."

"T-that's correct, Minister. I hope he is feeling better."

"I visited him in the hospital this morning and he seems to be doing much better. He is heavily sedated to avoid the pain. Those coal-miners did a number on him indeed."

"We still have not discovered the identity of his attackers, Minister," Peeta said in a low voice. "But he was turned into an Avox and I have reason to believe that means it was a Peacekeeper who committed the crime."

"Indeed? I will need you to report to me tomorrow, then, for a full report. Perhaps there is something in your notes that we are missing. We shall find whoever did this and they will be justly punished."

"Yes Minister." The Minister gestured to someone beside him and Peeta's eyes widened.

"Lieutenant, I believe you know Colonel Haemon of District 2?" Katniss felt Peeta's hands start to shake on her shoulders.

"Of course, sir. It's good to see you again. Congratulations on your promotion."

"Mellark," the older man sniffed, looking down his nose. "Yes, Minister Antonius told me you were promoted to First Lieutenant. I say, congratulations. Looks like all of our fine training did pay off after all." Peeta didn't say anything but the sneering man didn't seem to expect him to.

"Tell me, how is that brother of yours?"

"He's well, sir. He just married the Mayor's daughter, in fact."

"Indeed? Well, do pass on my congratulations. And I hear congratulations are in order for you as well." His eyes flicked to Katniss and she was startled to see how blue they were. Not like her husband's at all but pale, almost white. They terrified her.

"Yes sir. This is my wife, Katniss. Katniss, Colonel Haemon was my Lieutenant while I was in training."

"It's a pleasure, Colonel," she bowed her head and tried to smile.

"Tell me, Mrs. Mellark, what is your surname?" Peeta's hands clenched on her shoulders and she winced. Lie. Lie! He tried to reach her on the same brain waves. He had no idea why Haemon was asking but he knew it wasn't a good reason. Haymitch had told him to avoid using the Everdeen name and though Peeta did not understand why, he trusted the old Victor.

"It was something like Evergreen, wasn't it," the Minister asked.

"Everdeen, Minister." Katniss's hands rested in her lap.

"Everdeen, yes. And your father was a coal-miner, was he not?"

"That's correct, sir," she said, her brow furrowing in confusion.

"He died in that tragic explosion almost 8 years ago," Haemon said to Antonius. "Such a tragedy. President Snow sent medals of honor and food baskets to the victims' families, you recall." Katniss, however, did not recall a food basket from the Capitol. Nor did she remember anyone from the Capitol expressing their condolences. She just recalled feeling hollow and hopeless, as she stood next to her mother and sister at the Justice Building.

"Our condolences, Mrs. Everdeen-Mellark."

"Just Mellark, Minister," she shook her head. "It does us no good to dwell on the past."

"Except when the past can drag you back down, Mrs. Mellark." Katniss's eyes darted from the Minister back to her lap and she felt Peeta positively shaking behind her.

"Well, enjoy your evening, Lieutenant Mellark. A pleasure, Mrs. Mellark." Katniss nodded faintly and Peeta sank into the seat next to her. She reached for his hand and frowned at how cold and clammy his palm was. Haymitch leaned in and whispered something to Peeta. Peeta shook his head but his eyes remained downcast.

"Mrs. Mellark, would you like a drink," he pushed the glass past Peeta toward her.

"Thank you, Mr. Abernathy. I don't really drink much."

"Perhaps you should start," he took a swig from his glass. "Buck up, Lieutenant. Dinner will start soon and the introductions will be put on hold."

"I'm not sure I can handle any more introductions, Haymitch," Peeta said weakly. Haymitch coughed and set his glass down.

"Well then prepare yourself, Lieutenant. Because Caius Snow is headed this way."


	29. Chapter 29

_**Here is a long one for you wonderful readers and there is A LOT going on in it. Be warned, there are mentions of rape/non-con, so please read at your own risk. There is also a lot of smut in this one.**_

 _ **I have a couple of very busy weeks coming up with a wedding, a business trip, and a vacation to LA. I will try to post when I can but I just wanted to warn you all, it might be longer than usual.**_

* * *

"Senator Snow," Minister Antonius bowed low as the President's son approached the table. "An honor, sir."

"Evening Antonius," the man said, looking bored. "What's the good word, tonight?"

"We are just discussing the past Games, Senator," Antonius gestured to the men and women around him. "Quite the spectacle!"

"Was it? I personally think the Head Gamemaker is losing his touch," the Senator inspected his nails, which were painted black. "I've told Father it's time to replace him."

"Senator, where is the President this evening?" Antonius looked around and it both surprised and pleased Katniss that he was looking a bit anxious.

"Oh Father is indisposed. Afraid he isn't feeling that well. Rest assured, Antonius, I'm company enough." He laughed at his own joke and everyone forced out a laugh. Katniss had seen him on the holo a few times, always by his father's side. He resembled his father in many ways, though the President was clearly aging and often looked ill. The younger Snow was robust with a round face and a belly to match. His cheeks were dotted with a very strange pattern of facial hair and his eyes were yellow. Katniss had to look twice to make sure she was seeing correctly. Yes, his eyes were actually yellow. With an amused sneer, the man terrified her to her core.

She wasn't sure if she would be more afraid of the man's father, the man she hated the most. This man might very well come in second place in her mind.

"Well Senator, you remember Colonel Haemon and General Duartyr? Colonel Thicke and Commander Thread? And over here we have First Lieutenants Mellark and Fuldom."

"All fine Peacekeepers, so I hear," Snow nodded to the men.

"And of course you know the Victors."

"Of course," he shot a wink toward the woman who sat next to Gloss, who Katniss recognized to be Cashmere, the sister Victor. "Please, take your seats." Everyone was sitting already, save for Antonius, but they all bowed their heads in respect. Snow sat at the head of the table, the place that was reserved for the President but no one dared say anything. He clapped his hands and servants rushed forward with covered trays. Peeta found Katniss's hand in her lap and rested them both on his knee. Katniss tried to eat but her ridiculously long talons they had given her kept getting in the way. She glanced up and down the table but saw that no one was eating with their hands. Sighing, she set her fork down and reached for the bread on the plate. It was coarse and much too crumbly, nothing like the bread her baker made.

Peeta tensed beside her and she wasn't quite sure why until she saw quite a few pairs of eyes rest on her. Peeta watched as Snow's eyes narrowed in on his wife and the Senator whispered something to the Minister, who nodded and whispered something back. She swallowed and kept her head lowered, staring at her plate. The whispers buzzed like an angry tracker-jacker's nest.

"Who is she? I've never seen her before."

"I hear she's married to the Lieutenant but LOOK at that dress. That's fit for a Victor."

"I would kill for her hair!"

"Don't worry about it, sunshine," Johanna Mason hissed across the table. "They're all just dying to tear that dress right off your back. In more ways than one."

"Miss Mason, please," Peeta said through gritted teeth.

"Sorry sweet cheeks. You were a matter of interest last time you were here but it's her they can't take their eyes off of tonight." Katniss's cheeks reddened so it was a good thing she was covered in makeup.

"Pay no attention to them, sweetheart," Finnick Odair winked at her. She swallowed and went back to chewing her food. Peeta scooted his chair closer so that his thigh was touching hers. Other than the occasional glance, people left her alone.

Peeta watched her out of the corner of his eye, their hands grasped tightly under the table. Even with all of the makeup and the finery, they had still learned her identity. All he wanted was to get away from the Capitol with his wife safe by his side. He wondered when dinner would end and when it would be appropriate to return to their hotel. His eyes flickered to Senator Snow and he sighed deeply. Across the table, Haymitch caught his eye and gave him a subtle shake of the head. He frowned, uncertain as to what the Victor was trying to tell him but Haymitch's eyes fell back to his plate and he didn't look up again.

Avoxes came forward to collect plates and set down more in their place. Peeta felt ready to burst but the Capitolites kept eating as if they hadn't been eating all night. Katniss rubbed her stomach gingerly and he could tell she was feeling a bit ill. She definitely wasn't used to all of the fine food and he doubted she had ever eaten so much in her entire life.

"Dessert, sir?" One of the servants took a plate from an Avox and set it in front of him. He groaned internally when he saw dozens of little cakes and pastries.

"No thank you," Katniss was saying as they set another tray in front of her.

"Pass this to the Lieutenant's wife," Senator Snow said from the end of the table, pushing a tall flute filled with clear liquid. The Capitolites giggled as they passed the flute down the table and Katniss took it, blinking in surprise.

"Go on, Mrs. Mellark," Snow said with a smile as he sat back in his chair. "How else will you be able to have any fun at a feast?" Peeta realized what it was just before she took a sip, and he placed a hand over the rim of the glass.

"I presume we are meant to drink this in there," he gestured toward the toilets in the next room.

"Quite right, Lieutenant Mellark," Snow laughed. Katniss looked even more baffled and Peeta pushed his chair back.

"Won't you excuse us, Senator?" Snow nodded, his hands folded behind his head as Peeta helped Katniss to her feet and he took the glass from her. Haymitch cast him a look as he hurried his wife out of the room. Only a handful of people were eating dinner, while the rest continued to drink and dance and continue on their merry little ways.

* * *

Peeta pulled Katniss down a long hall and she struggled to keep up on the pointy uncomfortable shoes they had put her in.

"Peeta, please slow down."

"I'm sorry," he gasped, leaning against a door. Katniss took the glass and studied the contents.

"What is this?"

"Something to make you sick, I would assume," he shook his head. "People starving back in 12 and here, they're just throwing it up to stuff more in." He took the glass and dumped the liquid into a potted plant.

"When can we leave this place, Peeta?" He glanced at her and smiled weakly.

"Soon, love. Dinner will be over soon, and we can return-"

"I don't mean the mansion, Peeta, I mean the Capitol. It's awful. My skin is crawling. I just want to go home." He no longer cared about messing up her makeup. He reached for her face and pulled her close.

"I know, Katniss. I know. But you're doing beautifully. You've done such a wonderful job tonight."

"And it didn't matter," she shook her head. "They still know who I am."

"It doesn't matter," he said firmly. "You're my wife and I will protect you. They won't lay a hand on you, I promise." She blinked back tears and he held her face in his hands. She grasped his wrists and wanted to lean in to kiss him but was afraid of the headdress. He, however, couldn't have cared less. He tilted his head and captured her lips. She moaned into the kiss and he sighed as her lips parted, allowing his tongue to slip inside her mouth. She leaned back to breathe and he stroked her cheek.

"Are you ready?" She knew what he was asking. Was she ready to return to that table full of people she despised?

"As long as you stay with me." He offered his arm and cupped her chin.

"Always, Katniss."

* * *

When they returned, the Senator gave them a devious smile. Peeta nodded in his direction as he pulled the chair out for his wife, then sat down beside her. He was relieved to see most of the dishes had disappeared from the table and they weren't replacing them this time. Avoxes were handing out small cups of coffee and people were leaving the table. Snow stood and checked his pocket watch.

"Well the show will begin soon. Will my honored guests follow me?" Snow made eye contact with a handful of people and lead the way. How large was this mansion anyway, she asked herself. Peeta's hand slipped into hers and she felt a rush of comfort that she had come to associate with her husband. People were filing down the hallway, whispering amongst each other. Haymitch gave them a miserable look and gestured for them to follow him.

"Stay close, and whatever you do, do not let her out of your sight," he hissed over his shoulder. Peeta pulled her in closer and bit his lip.

"What's going on, Haymitch?"

"I was hoping they would spare us this but the odds have never been in my favor. Just sit beside me and keep quiet. Got it?" Peeta nodded and glanced sideways at Katniss.

Snow lead them to an even larger room and Katniss frowned when she saw not only a large bed in the center but several structures that she did not understand. Peeta's grip on her hand tightened as he threw Haymitch a frightened look. The Victor said nothing as he took his seat, gesturing for Peeta and Katniss to sit on his other side. Katniss didn't see Johanna Mason or Finnick Odair or any of the other Victors who had been sitting near them. Senator Snow stood at the front of the room and rubbed his hands together.

"As many of you know, Victors Unleashed is expected to be the biggest television phenomenon for years to come! Tonight, I'm going to give you all, an elite handful of my father's loyal subjects, an exclusive sneak peek of this daring show! Featuring all of your favorites, like you've never seen them before… unless you're rich enough to," he winked and there were some titters from the crowd. Peeta noticed Haymitch clenching his fists in his lap.

"Without further adieu, please welcome Cashmere and Brutus!" The crowd exploded as two Victors entered the room. Katniss wanted to clap her hands over her eyes; the male Victor was wearing only a tiny pair of underwear that covered absolutely nothing. Cashmere's long golden hair covered her bare breasts but she wore a skimpy purple… well, it could hardly be called underwear. She turned and her cheeks were exposed, with a tiny piece of material sliding between the cleft. She wiggled her ass and blew a kiss toward the audience. There were wolf whistles and laughs as Brutus grabbed a fistful of her hair and pulled her toward him. Peeta cast Haymitch a terrified look but the older man's eyes were pointed toward the ceiling.

"Peeta?" Katniss whispered in Peeta's ear, clearly mystified. Peeta wrapped his arm around her shoulder and tilted his body so that he was shielding her from the horrors they were witnessing. Brutus and Cashmere lost the skimpy material that covered their private parts and they were getting into a position that Peeta and Katniss had become quite familiar with but only in the privacy of their bedroom. The rougher the Victor was with Cashmere, the more the crowd cheered. Katniss felt sick as she watched Brutus force the young woman to her knees and fisted her hair as she took his enormous length into her mouth. Brutus looked over to the crowd and winked, before he jammed his cock down her throat, making her gag. The crowd laughed cruelly while Cashmere choked and gagged. Katniss searched the crowd for Gloss; surely he wouldn't be laughing at the way his sister was being treated but she didn't see him anywhere.

"I think I'm going to be sick," Peeta muttered, low enough for only her to hear. She nodded in agreement and squeezed her eyes shut. It didn't block out the sounds of Brutus's grunts or the crowd's frenzied cries at what Brutus should do next.

"Show her who's boss, Brutus!" Someone on Katniss's left cried. She shook her head and wished she could bury her face in Peeta's chest. The stupid headdress that she wore prevented her from being able to even turn away from the scene.

It was even worse when the next "act" began.

Johanna, Gloss, and another Victor from 2- Katniss knew her face but not her name. Her teeth had been sharpened, giving her the ability to rip peoples' throats out. Gloss had a thick leather collar around his neck and it was attached to a leash that Johanna held in her hand. Peeta sank back in his chair, gripping the edge tightly. The crowd cheered as Johanna took the whip from the other Victor's hand and started to beat Gloss with it while he serviced the Victors on his hands and knees. Katniss rubbed her stomach, feeling her dinner close to coming back up.

"Haymitch, please," Peeta said desperately. "She doesn't understand this. We can't...surely we can leave?"

"Don't draw attention to yourself," Haymitch said, his lips barely moving. Peeta glanced back up at the Victors and winced as he saw Gloss pounding into Johanna from behind. The other Victor, Enobaria, he remembered was her name, was approaching him from behind with a long rubber toy attached to her center. Peeta's eyes widened and he shook his head, looking away. If this is what it took to fit in, to hell with it. He could never understand this debauchery and was disgusted that it was a way of life here. He glanced around at the crowd and grew even more livid as they continued to catcall and cheer. His people were starving to death, dying in the streets, while these… animals sat here, glorifying this preversion.

Katniss looked like she was about to either be sick, or cry. Maybe both. He squeezed her hand and had a sudden urge to rip off her headdress so that he could hold her to his chest. The show went on until finally, FINALLY, the male Victor came all over the female Victor's face and the crowd cheered. Snow stood up and clapped, while the Victors hurried out of the room.

"And now, I need a volunteer." As excited as the crowd was just a moment ago, they were silent now and looked up and down each other's rows. They avoided the Senator's eyes, muttering under their breath.

"We need someone to partner with our Golden Boy. No one better than the Sun herself." Peeta forgot how to breathe. He gripped Katniss's hand even as some of the Capitolites stood and tried to pull her to her feet. Katniss threw Peeta a frantic look but she was determined to hold herself with dignity in front of these monsters. Peeta started to go after her but Haymitch grabbed his wrist. Katniss walked, her hands folded in front of her and her head lowered, towards the Senator. He held out his arms and gave her a smile. A chill was sent straight down her spine as he reached and grazed her arm.

"Have you ever wanted to fuck someone other than your husband? Now's your chance, my sweet." He removed her headdress and her long dark hair tumbled down her back. He steered her toward the bed, his hands on her shoulders, and made her sit on the edge. The door opened and Finnick Odair walked in, wearing only a pair of tight golden shorts. The crowd went crazy while Peeta bit down on his lip so hard it started to bleed. Finnick cupped Katniss's chin and gave her a smile. Only she could see the sadness in his eyes.

"Take off your dress, sunshine." She shook her head and Finnick knelt on the bed behind her. He moved her hair off to the side and kissed her neck.

"How do you fuck the Sun, Odair," Snow called from the side. "Willingly, or by force?"

"What do you think, Sunshine," he said in a stage whisper. "Will you spread your legs for me willingly or do I need to bind you?"

"Get your filthy hands off of me," she snarled, rearing back and hitting him in the face. The crowd gasped collectively and Snow's eyes flashed.

"The girl has fire," Finnick called laughingly. Katniss jumped off the bed and started to run but he caught her, gripping her arm tightly. Peeta leaped to his feet, struggling to get to her. Haymitch did his best to hold him down and it was hard to tell whose strength was greater, the Peacekeeper or the Victor.

"Haymitch, I will rip you apart if you don't let go of me-"

"I'm trying to keep you alive," the Victor snarled in his ear. Haymitch clapped his hand over Peeta's mouth and his eyes widened, tossing his head to get away from the drunken Victor. His senses may have dimmed over the years but his strength had not waned.

"I suppose that answers that question," Snow laughed as he dragged Katniss over to one of the structures and bound her to it. He started to unzip the gown, then gestured for Finnick to take over.

"Odair could have been gentle. They say he is the son of the sea god after all. But the sea does not like to be restrained." Finnick glanced at the crowd then back at the struggling girl before him. The dress stopped at her waistline and Finnick stepped back.

"Senator Snow, with all due respect, I think the Lieutenant should join in on the...fun. After all, she is his light. If she is indeed the sun, I imagine he worships her on bended knee." Snow jerked his chin and someone yanked Peeta forward. Someone else bound his hands behind his back and pushed him toward his bound wife. Her hands and ankles were chained to the structure, her legs spread apart despite the huge dress she wore. Snow stood by, his arms crossed, watching down his pointed nose. Peeta wished someone would run him through with a blade. He had failed her. He had failed to protect her.

He took a deep breath and turned to face the Senator.

"Sir… she's untouched. By any man, in fact, she doesn't understand any of this. District 12 maintains a certain sense of innocence. She has never been exposed to anything like these practices."

"You mean to tell me you haven't claimed your wife in all the time you have been married," the Senator snorted.

"We were only wed a week and some days ago. She remains a virgin, as do I." Snow uncrossed his arms.

"You? A Virgin Peacekeeper?"

"I never wanted anyone but her," he shrugged. "She's still innocent and I didn't want to push her in any way. We have always said it will happen in its own time. We don't need to rush it. I love her more than life itself, and will do anything to make her happy. I'll do anything to protect her." Some of the women in the audience sniffed and dabbed at their cheeks.

"Take me instead," he pleaded. "I'll do whatever you may ask, but just leave her out of it, I beg of you."

"What do you think, guests?" Snow turned to the crowd and held up his arms, reminding Peeta of a Roman conqueror, right before he was about to squash an army.

"Are we in the mood to see two virgins stumble through an awkward night?" The crowd seemed uncertain how to respond.

"They're not even Victors, Senator Snow," Finnick stepped forward, crossing his arms. "Why should we be interested in a couple from an outlying district when there is quality entertainment before you?" The Capitolites started to nod slowly, still muttering. Snow scowled, his eyes full of ice and malice.

"Fine. Release them. We are out of time anyway." Finnick stepped behind Peeta and tugged at the rope at his hands.

"Nice job," he muttered in his ear. Peeta frowned but as soon as he was free, he ran to Katniss.

"I'm right here," he stroked her hair and kissed her temple. She turned her head and it tugged at his heart when he saw tear streaks messing up the makeup. He and Finnick had her out of the chains and he pulled her to his chest, his heart racing against her cheek. Finnick gave them a nod and disappeared from the room. Peeta watched him go with his jaw agape. No one paid them any mind as they all filed from the room and Peeta thought it best to go ahead and be gone from there immediately. He looked around for Katniss's headdress and saw Haymitch held it in his hands.

"Come on," he jerked his head. "I'm ready to get out of here, aren't you?" Peeta nearly tripped over his own feet in his haste to get away from that room.

* * *

They shared a car with Haymitch and rode to the hotel in silence. Katniss kept her face hidden in her husband's chest the entire ride and Peeta stared out the window, his jaw clenched. Haymitch drank from the flask he kept pulling from his pocket. No one said a word.

Katniss stopped in front of their door but Haymitch shook his head and gestured for them to follow him.

"Just trust me." He pushed the door open and flung his key aside.

"You two go ahead and wash all that stuff off of you. There are robes hanging in the bathroom. When I finish drinking until my liver gives out, I'll get you a new room."

"Haymitch-" but the Victor closed the door without another word. Peeta looked around the room wordlessly, then his eyes met Katniss's. She wanted to stay strong, she really did. But the night's events had taken their toll and she felt her knees buckle. Peeta caught her before she hit the ground and kissed her forehead.

"You need to get out of this dress. It has to weigh at least ten pounds." She didn't protest as he pulled at the buttons and zippers until she felt it drop around her ankles. He walked around behind her and scoffed loudly.

"Why the hell did they put you into a corset, your waist is as big as my pinkie finger!" She remembered Cinna protesting that she didn't need the damned contraption but Portia had insisted. Peeta's hands worked at the stays and he grunted in frustration as he pulled it loose. He knelt and pulled the shoes off and rolled the silk stockings down her legs. She felt his fingers work at the complicated bra and she shivered as the cold air hit her nipples. His cheeks went pink and he swallowed.

"I'm sorry," he stammered. "I should have asked if… go ahead and finish undressing in the bathroom. Take a shower. You'll feel better." He turned and bent to collect all of her dressings and accessories. She wrapped her arm around herself and hurried into the bathroom. She stripped off her underwear and climbed into the shower.

She couldn't even feel the water as it beat down on her back, she was so exhausted. She placed her hands on the wall and lowered her head, finally allowing the tears to fall. With a sob, she collapsed to her knees and curled into a little ball.

That was how Peeta found her. He threw the expensive clothes aside without a care in the world and knelt beside her, pulling her into his arms and stroking her hair while her body shook with loud sobs. He had kept his satin shorts on and he stretched his legs in front of him so he could support her weight in his lap. She gripped his arm and cried into his chest.

He wasn't sure how long they had sat there. Haymitch could be back at any minute but Peeta doubted it; he imagined the old man would be lost in a bottle when they found him. The water was cold so he reached over to change the temperature. When she seemed to stop crying, he grabbed a cloth from the back of the toilet and wet it under the stream of hot water. He cupped her chin and gave her a sad smile as he brought the cloth to her cheek. Her makeup disappeared down the drain and he leaned forward to kiss the sliver of olive skin that reappeared at her neck. She shivered as his lips traveled up her neck, across her cheek, and over her nose and eyelids. She held his gaze for a moment before leaning forward and tucking her head under his chin. He dropped the cloth and wrapped his arms around her. He didn't know what to say, didn't know if there were words TO say, so he held her in silence. He dreaded returning to the mansion tomorrow. What new horrors awaited them? Surely President Snow was more dangerous than his son. And what would he do once he found out how Katniss had disobeyed orders? When he found out how Peeta himself had begged for mercy?

Peeta kissed her shoulder and gently rocked her back and forth, until she seemed to fall asleep in his lap. He fumbled for the rag and finished cleaning the pounds of makeup from her face. He knew she would want to take the nails off but he had no idea how to go about that so he left her hands alone. He quickly poured some of the hotel shampoo into her hair and scrubbed with one hand, gently dipping her head back to rinse it out. Sighing, he kissed her forehead and squeezed her hand.

"Sweetheart, can you stand while I wash off?"

"Hm?" Her eyes fluttered open and widened. "Oh! Peeta, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to fall asleep-"

"It's ok," he cut her off. "I just need to wash my hair and my face. The robe is hanging by the door." She nodded and stepped out onto the rug, feeling a rush of warm air hit her. She gasped as she realized she was standing on a dryer and her hair was no longer sopping wet. Peeta stood under the stream, shivering as the water had gotten much too cold. He felt a little awkward showering in his underwear but holding his naked wife in his arms had given him a massive hard-on, as much as he had willed it not to happen, and he decided to keep them on to spare them both the embarrassment. He quickly ran his fingers through his hair, watching the gold color stream down the drain. He hadn't had nearly as much makeup as she had so he finished quickly and turned the water off. Katniss was standing in front of the mirror, wearing the robe, and seemed to be trying to poke her eye out.

"How do I get this thing out," she whined.

"Carefully," he grabbed the robe. "Just relax and breathe." She managed to get one out and she tossed it into the trash bin. When she turned to face him, he sighed with relief at the sight of her stormy grey eyes looking back at him.

"I missed my silver-eyed huntress," he stroked her cheek. She smiled weakly and rested her cheek against his chest.

"Hey kid, get out here," he heard Haymitch call.

"I'll be right back." He backed out of the bathroom and was surprised to see Haymitch standing up straight.

"I expected you to be passed out drunk by now."

"Have to get you two out of my room before I can do that," he tossed Peeta a room key. "Front desk has moved you due to some kind of contamination in your room. Chaff and I already inspected it. An Avox is moving your stuff as we speak."

"Won't Snow be suspicious that we moved rooms?"

"No. Hotels get bugs and mold all the time. And the front desk confirmed it. So go on and get out of my room so I can settle in with my bottle." Peeta collected their clothes and pulled Katniss from the room.

"Thanks Haymitch," he said softly.

"Don't thank me, kid. Not yet anyway." He glanced at Katniss, who was hiding her face in her husband's shoulder. "She ok?"

"She'll be fine. Just shaken up."

"You did good tonight, sweetheart," Haymitch said, surprisingly kindly. "Both of you did. I'll see you tomorrow. And I'll tell you what I've found out about Darius and Rosalie." Peeta wanted to argue but Haymitch looked ready to shut down completely, so he nodded and lead Katniss down the hall to their new room.

* * *

Katniss stripped out of the robe and pulled on her own threadbare nightgown. Peeta took a moment to change into some fresh underwear, then pulled on a pair of flannel pants. As soon as he sat on the bed, Katniss was on him, climbing into his lap and wrapping her legs around his waist. He gasped, his hands flailing in surprise as her lips crashed upon his. None too gently, she grinded against him and his hands flew to her hips.

"Hey," he leaned back, his hand moving to cup her cheek. "Slow down. It's ok."

"I don't want to talk," she tried to kiss him again but he leaned out of her reach.

"Katniss, we don't have to do this. Not tonight. We both need some rest."

"You don't...want me?"

"That's not it and you know it," he shook his head. "You're scared. I am too, but we can't use...this to make ourselves feel better. It's not right. I told you I won't let anything happen to you."

"You offered to take my place," she said faintly. He nodded solemnly.

"Whatever it takes to keep you safe, Katniss, I'll do it. Haymitch was practically sitting on top of me to keep me from getting to you. I was about to punch him out when they pulled me up there with you."

"He was just trying to keep you alive," she shrugged.

"If anything had happened to you, that wouldn't have mattered. And I would have killed anyone who had anything to do with it." Seeing his fierce expression, she knew he was telling the truth.

"I'm fine, Peeta. And Finnick looked...well, he looked sad. Like he didn't want to be there."

"I can't imagine he wanted to. I can't imagine any of them actually want to be doing that. Haymitch told me that Snow has the Victors sold but I didn't believe it until I saw it with my own eyes."

"So how can they stand it? Why do they do it?"

"I'm sure he has ways of forcing them. I was ready to take your place, to keep any harm from coming to you. I imagine it's the same with many of them. Snow can threaten someone they love. And he can make sure they bend to his will."

"I hate him, Peeta. I hate his whole family and I hate this place."

"I know," he pulled her toward him and wrapped his arms around her. "I do too. I despise what he stands for and hate myself for being counted among his rank of loyalists. I hate that I had to bring you here, to be this close to him. I hate that someone else actually touched you tonight and I didn't do anything to stop it."

"Well the whole Capitol knows we haven't had sex now," she said bitterly.

"Not the whole Capitol but I guess it will get around. As if there aren't more important matters to worry about."

"But Finnick is right. We're not important, like Victors. Why should people care?"

"I don't know. I'd like to say we aren't but the way that important people were interested in you tonight bothers me."

"Why did that Colonel talk like he knew who I was?" Peeta shook his head.

"I still don't know why the Minister was so interested in your surname and your father, Katniss. That's one mystery that is driving me insane. And I know Haymitch knows something but he won't tell me."

"My dad never left 12, as far as I know. I mean, it's hard enough for normal people but people from the Seam definitely can't leave." Peeta shook his head again and closed his eyes.

"Let's worry about it tomorrow. Do you think you can get some sleep?"

"I can try," she said dubiously. They settled against the pillows and he reached over to turn off the light.

"Why did Haymitch have our rooms switched?"

"He said our first room was bugged." Katniss frowned in the dark.

"What do you mean, bugged? Like we were being watched?"

"Yes. You spoke about feeling uneasy last night. Your hunter's instincts are even keener than I thought."

"But why would Snow set up cameras in our room? Doesn't he trust you?"

"I don't know, love. I thought he did but maybe… well, let's talk more tomorrow, ok? I'm exhausted." He kissed her forehead and grasped her hand. Sleep came easily to him but she was wide awake. She hated everything about this place and thought about the Victors. What they had been forced to do tonight. Was that a normal occurrence? What if someone refuses? What happens to them? And why hadn't someone stood up to fight before now? How did one man hold so much power over an entire country? District 12 wasn't the biggest district, it was true, but with the other districts combined, she was sure they could conquer the Capitol. What was it that Peeta had said the other night? About more than twelve districts fighting back? He had mentioned one district that specialized in nuclear weaponry… but that had been District 13. The Capitol had bombed 13 and had wiped away all memory of it. Could there be a chance that 13 wasn't gone, after all? What else did Peeta know? And what was it that Haymitch wanted Peeta to do so badly? What had Snow seen and heard last night? She was suddenly glad she had ceased Peeta's advances. She shivered and crossed her arms to cover herself, imagining if they had done anything. A room full of people watching them… it was disgusting. This place was vile, she decided.

Her head ached with all of the questions and she wished she could fall asleep as easily as Peeta had. She tried, wriggling around and closing her eyes, but she wound up throwing the blanket off and moving off the bed with a huff. Peeta didn't stir so she crept into the bathroom and closed the door. She still felt like she was caked in makeup and fragrances, her body tingling from the beauty treatments she had received earlier. She stripped her clothes off and filled up the giant tub. Making sure to only open one bottle this time, she tipped some of the lavender into the water and inhaled deeply. Her mother had always said lavender was calming. She stepped into the hot water and sighed. Taking the cloth, she scrubbed at her face and her arms, wincing as her long nails scratched her cheek. Groaning, she tried to pull the nails off but they were glued on.

"Fantastic," she grumbled. She would make them take them off tomorrow.

She leaned her head back and closed her eyes; they snapped open again when she heard the door creak. Peeta poked his head in, his hair tousled from sleep.

"What are you doing?"

"Can't sleep. Sorry I woke you."

"You didn't. I just… I panic when I wake up and you're not there. Stupid, really, since I've only had you in my bed for a little over a week." He shrugged and stepped into the bathroom. She sat up and cocked her head.

"Want to join me?" He stared at her for a moment until he pushed his pants down his legs and stepped out of them. She watched unabashedly as he pushed his briefs down and he bit his lip. His manhood lay flaccid against his thigh but seemed to twitch as she wet her lips. She patted her leg and he smiled as he lowered himself into the water in front of her. She wrapped her arm around his chest and his cheek rested against her breast.

"This is nice," he sighed, closing his eyes.

"Can't fall asleep," she warned. He chuckled lightly and glanced down at himself.

"I uh, don't see that being a problem." She followed his eyes and her lips curved upwards. It astonished her, how quickly she had gone from never seeing a naked man to wishing her husband would just do away with clothing altogether. It delighted her when she saw him coming to life, knowing that it was because of her. Because of how much he desired her. She reached down and closed her fist around him, smiling at his sharp intake of breath. She trailed her tongue along his ear and moved down to suck at his throat.

"Oh my god, Katniss," he moaned, his head tilting back. Katniss admired his throat, finding herself wanting to follow the pattern of his adam's apple with her tongue. He whined as her tongue trailed across his hot flesh, bucking his hips up into her hand. He sat up so suddenly she was about to ask if she had done something wrong but he spun around and leaned down to kiss her, his hands squeezing both of her breasts. She whimpered, which only made him harden even more, and with a low growl, he bent to close his lips around her nipple. She was sure they were soaking the floor, with the way they were splashing around, but he didn't seem to care and frankly, neither did she. Peeta's hand moved down her stomach and prodded at her folds, gently spreading her apart with his fingers. She stifled her cry when his middle finger made contact with her clit and he gently rubbed before pushing inside her. He muffled her moans with his lips, adding a second finger and curling them inside her. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head as she was overtaken by pleasure. Somehow, she managed to find his erection emerging from the water and she closed her fist around him, pumping fiercely. With the pent up frustration from the previous night, it didn't take either of them very long. Peeta spilled onto her breasts and she collapsed against the tub, panting heavily. When they came to, she leaned up and climbed into his lap. His arms automatically went to her waist and he hissed when she came dangerously close to his length.

"I don't want to be innocent anymore." His brow furrowed.

"What do you mean?"

"You talked about me being innocent. I don't want to be innocent anymore."

"Katniss, I was just trying-"

"I'm ready, Peeta." His eyes widened.

"Wait. What?"

"I'm ready. I want to have sex with you. If you can find...something… to prevent pregnancy, I mean, then I'm ready." He swallowed, feeling his cock come to life and he mentally scolded it. DOWN! NOT. THE. TIME!

"Katniss… you know I love you. And you should know how much I want you. But do you really want it to be here? In this place that we both loathe?"

"I don't care. I want you, Peeta." His eyes fluttered shut. Dear god, those words alone made him stand at attention.

"God I want you too," he murmured, tracing his tongue along her throat. "I just… I want to do this right. And not when we're both love-drunk from orgasm. Can we wait… one more night? If you decide, tomorrow night that you still want to, I will find some condoms somewhere and I'll make the sweetest love to you until you can't move."

"Why do you want to wait?"

"Because I want you to be absolutely sure. And I think you're still a little freaked about what happened tonight. I don't want you to have any regrets in the morning." She huffed and he laughed as he moved a strand of hair behind her ear.

"Humor me. I'm the one who has been dreaming of this since I was fourteen." She bit her lip but nodded.

"Ok, fine. Did I get all the makeup off my face?"

"Yes. You look like you again."

"Good." She stood up on shaky knees and Peeta determinedly tried to avoid looking at the sweet treasure between her legs. As many times as he had tasted her, he hadn't ever taken his time to really look his fill, and he licked his lips at the sight. A triangle of dark curls taunted him as she rubbed her thighs together. He glanced up at her before he leaned forward and pushed her legs apart.

"Peeta," she gasped above him, her hand flying to the wall to steady herself. Peeta closed his eyes as he explored her, relishing her taste. He knew as long as he would live he would never forget that taste, or tire of it for that matter. He'd been a little grossed out, when his brothers had first told him about the act of pleasuring a woman. That's where bodily fluids came from and… well, he wasn't too enthused. His thoughts turned, however, as he grew and watched Katniss from afar. As puberty set in and his thoughts grew more naughty, he dreamed of doing everything with Katniss Everdeen.

Now he gripped her thighs as his tongue plunged deep inside her, as deep as he could go. She gripped his hair and her moans echoed off the tile walls. His hand moved up to tweak her nipple as he flicked at her clit with the tip of his tongue. His eyes were locked on hers and the sight of his fair head between her legs was the most erotic thing she could imagine.

"Oh Peeta," she said breathily, her long nails stinging his scalp. He licked her through the waves of bliss, pulling away to kiss her stomach and her breasts. She threw her arm over her face as she leaned against the wall. His erection prodded his belly but he paid no attention to it as he cupped her chin and kissed her.

When they climbed back into the bed, Peeta could barely utter a word before Katniss was on her knees at his side and was taking him into her mouth.

Utterly spent and quite content, they both drifted off in each other's arms, no nightmares to speak of.


	30. Chapter 30

_**As I said guys, I will be on a business trip and then on vacation for about 2 weeks but I will try my best to post at some point on vacation! Til then, enjoy all of the drama this chapter holds! XOXO**_

* * *

A blaring siren woke them up with a start and he winced as her head knocked into his chin.

"Ow! Sorry Peeta."

"It's fine," he rubbed his chin. "What the hell is that?" He reached over and slammed his fist against the clock, the offending source of noise. It silenced immediately and he rolled his eyes.

"Shit. Well I'm awake."

"Me too. I'm really hungry, want me to order us some breakfast?"

"How about we get dressed and I take you out? There are some delightful little pastry shops right around the hotel." She nodded and he threw the blanket back. She blushed as she realized he had fallen asleep without putting his underwear back on, and he grinned at her pink cheeks.

"See what I mean? Pure and innocent." She scowled and jerked away from his lips.

"I am not. Just… cover up."

"Oh I don't care if you see me," his grin broadened as he crossed his arms behind his head. She rolled her eyes and hit his chest.

"Just get dressed. We have to go back to that boutique too, don't we?" His smile faded.

"Yes. Ellie said she expects us after lunch."

"Fantastic. Another afternoon of beauty torture."

"At least we sort of have our outfits chosen," he shrugged. "That part took forever yesterday."

"Do we? Cinna wasn't sure."

"Well Portia decided on that suit she was talking about, so I'm hoping they'll find something for you to match me."

"I don't suppose we can fake an illness?" He sighed and wrapped his arms around her.

"I wish we could. After last night though, I know President Snow is going to want to meet you...us. Want to meet with us." She leaned back and bit her lip.

"Peeta?"

"Mmhm?"

"I'm scared." He pulled her hand to his lips, then to his heart.

"I won't let anything happen to you," he promised. "I will die before I let any harm come to you."

That was what scared her the most.

* * *

Katniss noticed Peeta turning in front of the mirror and checking on his injury and she bit her lip. She was pretty sure that all of the intimate stuff, fun as it may be, was not good for his injured ribs.

"Are you sore this morning?" He looked up and shrugged.

"A little bit. It's not unbearable. Before you say anything, no, what we did last night did not make it worse." Her lips curved upwards.

"How do you know?"

"Because your kisses hold healing power. Every time you kiss me, I feel a little bit stronger."

"Is that so?" He nodded and tugged her toward him. "Well at this rate you should be stronger than a Career by now."

"I haven't gotten enough kisses for that yet," he said seriously. She stood on her toes and kissed him, their smiles identical.

"You're sneaky."

"I have no shame in sneaking extra kisses from you. I feel no guilt whatsoever."

"Oh get dressed you annoying thing. I brought some medicine with me so after the party tonight, we can put some on your bruise." She started to turn away but he held her arm.

"I'm feeling really weak all of a sudden, Katniss." She rolled her eyes.

"That's a shame." He gave a mock cry of indignation as she flounced away.

* * *

They didn't see Haymitch in the lobby so Peeta offered her his arm and they headed outside. He had a quick word with the doorman before he was leading her around the corner.

The city was bustling, even so early in the morning. People were dressed in suits and dresses and held briefcases in their hands. Katniss had never stopped to think about what they actually did for work in the Capitol. She supposed they had to work. Surely they didn't just sit at home and count their money?

Peeta looked to be in a good mood as they dodged the crowds and crossed the street. Katniss didn't want to do anything to wipe the smile off his face; she liked how it looked and how much more care-free he looked with it on. She slipped her hand into his and he squeezed before pulling her into a little shop.

They sat at a table in the corner with their paper cups and their danishes. Peeta had convinced her to try a new drink, something she couldn't pronounce. She thought it was a little bitter but she didn't say anything. He picked at his danish, muttering that his dad's were so much better. She grinned as she ate hers. They kept their hands entwined on the table as they ate, not saying much. Neither of them wanted to talk about last night, it seemed. Katniss wanted to bring up Darius and Rosalie but she was afraid of bringing the conversation to a screeching halt and she was actually enjoying their time together.

After they finished breakfast, Peeta took her a few blocks down to what was supposed to be a park. There was one real tree in the middle of it, and it was beautiful. There were marble statues all around, and the grass obviously was not real. People were spread out on blankets, however, reading their books and eating their lunches. Peeta glanced sideways at her, unsure of what she would think of the place. He liked the peace and quiet of it but she was used to real trees back home.

She gave him a smile and pulled him over to one of the fountains, where children were running back and forth through the water. She grinned as she cupped her hands and threw a handful of water at him. He cried out in indignation and proceeded to splash her right back. She squealed and tried to run from him, when he pulled her through and soaked her feet. Their laughter filled the air as they ran through the water, splashing each other like children. Katniss wondered if this was how it was for children in the Capitol. Completely care-free and always having fun. Never having to worry about starvation or the Reaping. Utterly content with life.

Peeta could tell her thoughts had taken a dark turn and he sighed, pulling her away from the park. They walked a little ways, as he pointed out various stores and restaurants. They didn't seem to have a destination; he just wanted to spend some time with her without having to think about what tonight might hold.

After they shared some lunch from a cart on the street, Peeta hailed a car and asked to be taken to Ellie's boutique. As soon as they walked in, Ellie dropped what she was doing to tend to them. Katniss wondered what Haymitch had said to her to have them be treated like this. Surely it wasn't just Peeta's station.

Cinna gave her a smile as he lead her off to the back room again. Katniss noticed Peeta's eyes on her as they walked, Cinna's arm around her waist.

"Peeta says you have our outfits already picked out."

"Portia chose that black suit for him. I've been making some adjustments to this dress all morning. Tell me what you think." He stopped in front of a gown that seemed to be made of jewels. Her eyes widened and he took it off the rack.

"It looks heavier than it is. Let's try it on you."

* * *

Cinna had his own team working on her hair and makeup, while he knelt at her feet to make sure the length was right. She was grateful that she didn't have to go through the whole mess she'd endured yesterday, although Ellie did say they would leave the nails on and paint them a different color. Another evening of not eating with silverware then.

"Alright, stand up for me." She did as he asked and glanced down at her feet. The red jewels caught the light and made it look like she was engulfed in flames.

"Give me a little twirl." She obeyed and he nodded, his smile widening.

"Perfect."

"Why red? Peeta's suit is black, isn't it?"

"It has red flames along the trim. And we turned you into the Sun last night, I think this is appropriate for tonight. I heard that you had fire last night." She turned quickly, frowning.

"What? Who said that?" The stylist shrugged.

"People talk."

"About me?"

"Oh Katniss, don't worry. People love to gossip."

"So you heard what happened last night." Cinna glanced sideways at his team.

"Will you three excuse us for a moment? Katniss and I need to find shoes to go with this."

"We found shoes," the women with green hair shook her head.

"She can barely stand in those. We won't be long."

"We don't have a lot of time before the party," the man wiggled his finger at Cinna. "Don't dawdle."

"We won't." The team left and Cinna closed the door behind them.

"Cinna? You heard what happened?"

"I heard," he said softly. "I'm so sorry, Katniss." She bit her lip and turned back to the mirror.

"I have no idea what to expect tonight."

"Just stay close to your husband. Smile politely and curtsy like I taught you. I'll do my best to make you look…"

"Not like me?" He sighed and crossed his arms.

"Your skin tone and your dark hair reveal that you're from the districts, Katniss. The president may know who you are but I don't want to call attention to it. That's why

I put you in so much last night. I'm trying to hide you in plain sight."

"I think it went the opposite, actually," she fidgeted. "People were staring at me all night. Johanna Mason said people wanted to rip that dress off of me and I felt like...like people were leering at me all night. It was creepy. And then at that horrible show…"

"I'll never understand how a person can treat another person in the worst ways," he shook his head, his lips thin. "The history books are full of atrocities and yet we seem to just hit rewind on history, and we repeat those mistakes again and again. Nothing will ever really change."

"Well you're a little ray of sunshine. Your girlfriend must love your company." Cinna gave her a wan smile.

"Shall we continue?"

"Ok. With any luck, people will stay the hell away from me tonight, lest they get burned."

"The girl on fire," he nodded. "I like the sound of it."

* * *

Once again, Peeta was left waiting for his wife, feeling more anxious by the second. Portia had kept his hair and makeup minimal, compared to last night, and for that, he was grateful. His hair was slicked back again and he tried not to scratch at the several red jewels they had glued to his face. He paced the room, checking his watch. He had called the Minister earlier that day to apologize for not being able to meet with him but he was told the Minister was in meetings all day and he wouldn't be able to see him anyway. Peeta felt uneasy about seeing his superiors tonight without much of an idea of what to expect.

"Lieutenant Mellark," someone said behind him. He turned and his eyes widened.

He had hardly recognized Katniss last night. Tonight, he could pick her out of a crowded room. Cinna and Ellie lead the way, with Katniss and her prep team bringing up the rear.

Her dark hair was streaked with red and tumbled down her back in waves. The red dress was stunning and ended in flames at the bottom; it looked like she was standing in the middle of a fiery inferno. One shoulder was left bare, and was covered in red jewels, similar to what they had glued on Peeta's face. Her eyes had been painted orange and red, with long red eyelashes glued on. Her nails were red and orange with hints of yellow toward the edges. When she moved, it looked like the dress was sparking! Peeta stared, his jaw agape. Katniss noticed his reaction and bit her lip.

"The, um, the shoes… I feel like I'm going to fall over. They're huge."

"I'm sure they won't notice anything but you," he said faintly. "You should wear flames more often. They suit you." She couldn't help but to smile.

"We're calling her the Girl on Fire," Ellie said with a proud nod. "Isn't the dress perfect?"

"It looks amazing," his eyes traveled up and down her frame. "I just… hope it's not too bold of a statement?"

"You both look like you belong in the Capitol, Peeta," Cinna said kindly. "And you look like a powerful couple. A force to be reckoned with." Peeta wasn't sure that was what he wanted. What if Snow thought that too?

"We'd better get going," Peeta showed her the watch. "Are you ready?" She nodded and took his arm, while he thanked Ellie and her team again. Katniss glanced backwards at Cinna, who gave her a reassuring nod, and she exhaled.

"We'll get through tonight," Peeta muttered in her ear. "Together."

* * *

When they arrived, the mansion looked much as it had the night before. Lights danced on the mansion walls, fire displays were all over the lawn, and people were dressed in the grandest of fashion. They went straight inside and hovered in the foyer.

"Can I get you something to drink?"

"Sure, thank you." He kissed her cheek and went off toward the refreshment table. Katniss tried not to fidget but she felt uncomfortable and far too exposed. She had almost asked Cinna to put more makeup on her face and to cover her hair. The garish Capitol fashion was like a mask and she needed something to hide behind right now.

"Well, surprised to see you back here after what happened last night." She turned quickly at the sound of the sneering voice. She frowned as two Victors swept into her view.

"Oh don't mind Johanna," Finnick Odair said cheerfully. "She's that pleasant to everyone. You look splendid, Mrs. Mellark. Fire. I quite like it."

"Cinna is a genius," she said, waving toward her dress.

"Oh that he is. Interesting choices, though, for someone who wants to blend in so badly. First the Sun, now Fire. Cinna isn't a master of subtlety, is he?" Katniss was about to respond with something nasty when Peeta returned, carrying two glasses.

"Miss Mason," he bowed his head. "Mr. Odair. You both look fetching."

"This old thing," Johanna batted her eyelashes. "And you got me a drink too? You're so kind." Peeta smiled as he handed her the other glass and Katniss tried to roll her eyes as discreetly as possible.

"So what can we expect from tonight?"

"Oh don't you worry. No more previews of Victors Unleashed any time soon."

"Johanna," Finnick hissed, shaking his head.

"He's asking if his little wife is in any danger of being called up to the stage again," she shrugged. "I'm just putting his fears to rest."

"That wasn't what I was asking, actually," Peeta said calmly. "Everyone said this was the party for a sixteen year old girl and I see no birthday girl anywhere."

"She's off choosing her birthday gift." Peeta noticed how Finnick stiffened at Johanna's words.

"There you are Finnick!" Finnick whirled around and his face softened. Peeta could not miss how the Victor's expression changed, from aloof and flirty to, well, one of deepest admiration. He knew that look. He, after all, had seen it on his reflection for years.

The Victor was infatuated with the newcomer.

And she was quite lovely indeed. She was tall and slender, with flowing red hair and sparkling green eyes. Katniss thought she looked vaguely familiar. Finnick tugged her hand to his lips.

"Annie, you're a vision tonight." The young woman, Annie, giggled and shook her head.

"I don't believe we've met," she extended her hand toward Peeta.

"Lieutenant Peeta Mellark of District 12, ma'am," Peeta kissed her hand. "And this is my wife, Katniss."

"Katniss. A plant that grows near the water, isn't it?"

"That's...right," Katniss nodded slowly.

"Well it's lovely to meet you both. I'm Annie Cresta. I'm sorry to interrupt but Finnick, someone was looking for you."

"Alright. Would you like to join me, Annie? I see a plate of cake with your name on it." She took his offered arm and smiled.

"Have a pleasant evening, Lieutenant and Mrs. Mellark," Finnick bowed before he lead Annie off. Peeta had almost forgotten Johanna still standing there with them.

"Love is weird," she muttered, shaking her head.

"Pardon?"

"Oh. Nothing. I think Haymitch was looking for you earlier, Lieutenant. I see him right over there."

"I actually needed to have a word with him. Katniss, do you mind?" She didn't want to be left alone with Johanna Mason but she nodded and Peeta kissed her hand

before striding across the room.

"Nice buns," Johanna mumbled.

"Sorry?"

"Your husband is a baker, isn't he? I'm sure he makes nice buns. In the bakery."

"Uh huh," Katniss's eyes narrowed. "His family owns a bakery. He doesn't have a lot of time to bake though, being First Lieutenant."

"Yeah I'd heard he was one of Haemon's little projects in 2. Surprised he's not too fucked up to join polite society, to be honest." Katniss scowled.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Well it's not my place to tell you, sunshine, if he hasn't already told you."

"Told me what?"

"Ah shit, here comes the rabble." Johanna rolled her eyes and Katniss looked over her shoulder to see Porter, Arcadia, and Cecilia approaching. She had no problem with any of them and she offered them a smile.

"Hi there."

"Katniss, you look stunning," Arcadia's eyes widened. "Wow, is that a Cinna original?"

"Why would Cinna make something special for a Peacekeeper's wife," Johanna scowled.

"Don't mind her," Cecilia leaned in close. "She's like that with everyone."

"So I've heard," Katniss glanced at Johanna with a disgusted look. How this girl had survived in Capitol society for so long was beyond her. Cinna had told her to be polite and mild-mannered. Johanna was crude, loud, and quite obnoxious.

She guessed when you were a Victor, you could get away with anything.

She quickly reminded herself what she had seen last night. Johanna was just a slave to the Capitol, like the rest of them. Katniss's eyes traveled over Porter and Arcadia and Cecilia and she wondered how they could be sold. Porter and Arcadia looked worse than many of the Seam children she had seen back home, thin and frail and barely even there. Cecilia had told her about her children back home in District 8. Did their families know what they were forced to do?

Johanna scowled at her as if she could read her thoughts.

"So, have we heard who little miss birthday star has chosen?"

"Not yet," Cecilia said quietly. "Her grandfather was giving her...more options the last I heard." Johanna's brow raised and her eyes moved about the room.

"And what about the one we discussed earlier this evening?"

"Undetermined," Porter said stiffly. Katniss had no clue what they were talking about, and her eyes sought out Peeta. He was standing with Haymitch, Finnick, Annie, and another man Katniss had never seen. He was fairly round, with a clean-shaven face and striking grey eyes. He was talking to Peeta, gesturing animatedly. Peeta smiled but looked slightly uncomfortable. Katniss wondered if it would be rude to excuse herself so she could join him.

"Please tell me Annie is not on that list," Johanna hissed to the others. Katniss frowned and turned to face them. Cecilia was shaking her head sadly and Porter chewed his thumbnail.

"Everyone made the list. Even those who have been out of commission. It's why he's ordered everyone to be here tonight."

"What are you all talking about?" Arcadia's eyes were unnaturally wide.

"Oh don't worry about it, Katniss. It doesn't affect you."

"Doesn't it? I'd heard she was added to the list too," Johanna said, her nose wrinkled as if she smelled something foul.

"Johanna," Cecilia said through gritted teeth.

"I've been added to what list? What's going on?"

"I think you should go have a word with your dear hubby," Johanna jerked her chin towards Peeta. "He is the one you should be worried about right now."

"Damn it, Johanna," Cecilia said angrily. "Why do you have to do that?" Katniss didn't wait for them to reply. She turned on her heel and almost ran across the room before she remembered not to draw any attention. Still, she hiked her dress up and hurried over across the room.

* * *

Peeta's eyes widened when he saw how quickly she was moving and he held out his arms, for her to run right into them.

"Are you alright?" She nodded but said nothing as she ran her hand up his arm. Annie gave her a kind smile but for some reason, it unnerved Katniss.

"Katniss, this is Plutarch Heavensbee, Gamemaker to President Snow," Peeta gestured to the man at his side.

"Pleasure," she said, nodding. It wasn't and she wasn't about to make it sound like it was. The Gamemaker, however, gave her a bow.

"An honor, Mrs. Mellark. I was just telling your husband about a singing show I will be producing soon. I hear you have quite the voice."

"I-"

"She does," Haymitch nodded, cutting her off. "She reminds me of a mockingjay."

"Truly remarkable creatures," Plutarch said cheerfully. Katniss's brow furrowed in confusion. She had always seen mockingjays as something of a slap in the face to the Capitol. After all, the jabberjays, one of the parent species of the mockingjay had embarrassed the Capitol deeply and were not considered good omens. The districts, however, loved them. And Katniss liked them even more because the Capitol disliked them so much.

"Oh Katniss, your dress even has a cute little mockingjay on it," Annie squealed, pointing. Katniss's frown deepened, studying her dress closely. Cinna had to have pinned it on. It wasn't a part of the dress and it was slightly hidden. Haymitch frowned and stepped closer.

"Could I have a closer look at that, Mrs. Mellark?" Before she could answer, he had unclipped the bird from her dress and held it in his palm.

"That's lovely. But it doesn't really match your dress all that well, does it? Here," he slid it into Peeta's palm, who looked surprised and confused.

"Hold onto that for your wife, won't you?" He gave Peeta a pointed look and still frowning, Peeta slipped the pin into his pocket.

"Well, how about it, Mrs. Mellark? Would you care to treat us to a little music tonight?" Katniss glanced at Plutarch then at her husband.

"I'm really...not all that comfortable with singing in public. Thank you though," she added graciously, lowering her head.

"Ah, a pity. If you change your mind, I would be eager to include you on my show. The Capitol people would love to see district people represented."

"Why," she asked before she could stop herself. She could have sworn Finnick was stifling a laugh.

"Why, to give them a chance to see how you all live in the districts! And really, it's a wonderful opportunity for your hometown. We would come and film you right at home and have a grand feast, which everyone is welcome to! You should really consider it." A feast. The only time they'd had anything resembling a feast was Parcel Day, when Haymitch had won the Hunger Games. She was too young to remember but she knew the Capitol provided food once a month, for a whole year. She was almost tempted to agree just so that her district could receive some food.

"I'll consider it sir," she said softly, giving him a flirtatious smile. Heavensbee was about to speak when loud music echoed around the room. Annie jumped, her face pale but Finnick lay his hand on her arm and whispered something in her ear. She seemed to relax but Katniss saw how her eyes still darted around the room.

"The presidential welcome," Heavensbee explained. "I'm sure I shall see you all later in the evening." He bowed low to the women, shook hands with Haymitch, and excused himself rather quickly. Haymitch cleared his throat and directed his attention to the stage in the front of the room. An elderly man stood there, one hand on his chest and the other behind his back. His hair and beard were both white, his face pale and gaunt, with eyes that were black as obsidian. His blue suit was fashionable but what caught Katniss's eye was the single white rose on his lapel. He smiled at the crowd and beckoned for someone to join him.

His granddaughter looked nothing like him. Aurelia Snow was lovely, with long blonde curls and big green eyes. She wore diamonds at the corner of her eyes that matched her diamond-studded dress. She smiled and waved to someone in the front.

"On behalf of my beloved granddaughter, we would like to thank you all for joining us here at the mansion. And I would like to wish Aurelia a wonderful sixteenth birthday. May it be one that you will never forget, darling." The old man brushed his knuckles across the girl's cheek and Katniss shivered at the gesture. Aurelia giggled and hugged her grandfather. Katniss couldn't understand how a child wasn't terrified of him. He looked like a snake, ready to strike his prey and drag it back to his hole before anyone could counter attack.

"Enjoy the festivities," Snow yelled, spreading his arms before lowering them and turning to say something to his son. Aurelia stood next to her father, her eyes traveling around the room.

"Excuse me. Lieutenant Mellark?" Peeta jumped as a man appeared out of nowhere, holding a silver tray with a white envelope.

"Yes, I'm Lieutenant Mellark."

"Here you are, sir." Peeta took the envelope with a frown but nodded to the man in thanks. Haymitch's wide eyes locked on the envelope. Peeta shook it open and studied the loopy handwriting.

"Um. President Snow is requesting a private audience with me before dinner." Haymitch looked wary.

"Your wife isn't included?"

"No. It says for me to come alone." Haymitch and Finnick traded looks. Katniss frowned at the letter, as if it would start smoking at any minute.

"Would it be possible to ask you gentlemen to keep my wife entertained while I have a word with our President?"

"Of course, Lieutenant. She can sit with us until you are finished." Peeta nodded and kissed Katniss's hand.

"I'll be right back," he promised. She nodded, her eyes following him across the room.

"Shall we, Mrs. Mellark?" She reluctantly took Haymitch's arm and he steered her in the opposite direction.

Peeta was uncertain about approaching the president. He had only met the man once and he was afraid it would be too bold to announce himself. Aurelia had excused herself to talk to friends and Snow was in conversation with a few men from his Board. Luckily, Snow saw him coming.

"Ah, Lieutenant Mellark. How good to see you again."

"An honor sir," Peeta bowed low. "You honor me with the invitation to join the festivities. Tell your granddaughter I wish her a very happy birthday."

"I will pass on the well wishes. Walk with me, Lieutenant." He gestured for Peeta to follow him into another room. There were considerably less people in here and Snow folded his hands behind his back.

"I must address several issues, Lieutenant Mellark."

"Sir?"

"I understand there was a bit of drama at the party last night." Peeta swallowed but did not speak.

"My son has a flair for the dramatics," the president rolled his eyes. "He should not have included your wife and I want to apologize for any distress toward her or you."

"Oh… I mean, thank you sir, I didn't… um-"

"I understand that you are both celibate, is that correct?" Peeta swallowed again. He really did not want to discuss his sex life with anyone, let alone the president of Panem.

"That's correct, sir."

"Well that changes things, then. My son should have delivered that news to me much earlier in the day."

"Um, sir?" Peeta was baffled.

"A virgin Peacekeeper is difficult to believe but not completely unheard of. I suppose you have no reason to lie to me. Most gentlemen would be grateful for the opportunity, after all."

"Sorry, sir, but what opportunity are you speaking of?"

"Why, to bed my granddaughter on her birthday, of course." Peeta felt like he would pass out. He hoped he didn't look as stunned as he felt.

"It's tradition," the president continued, seemingly oblivious to Peeta's discomfort. "For young girls to lose their virginity to a high-ranking official of certain wealth and stature. I have allowed Aurelia to choose for herself, unlike many families in the Capitol." He was going to be sick, he was sure of it. She's 16, he said to himself. Parents choose their 16 year olds' lovers? How sick is that?

Snow seemed to be waiting for Peeta to say something but he was lost for words.

"Um, sir, it would be a… a tremendous honor, but-"

"You are a virgin," Snow finished for him. "And that does present a problem. I wouldn't want my sweet girl to be mishandled her first time. She needs someone who knows what they are doing. No offense. My foolish son should have revealed this to me before the party. Only now does he choose to tell me. I must make alternative arrangements immediately." Peeta gaped in horror. Aurelia Snow had chosen HIM?! A mere Peacekeeper from District 12, hardly impressive in size or looks.

"This is disappointing but as I said, it is not your fault. I shall have words with my son. You may return to your wife, Lieutenant. I apologize again for what happened last night."

"Th-thank you, President Snow," he bowed to the man and tried not to seem too eager to flee from the room.

"I should like to meet your wife after dinner," Snow said casually. "I have heard much about her."

"She would be honored as well, sir."

"You may return-oh. Aurelia. My darling."

"Grandfather," she swept into a curtsy before giving Peeta a wide smile. Peeta felt his heart hammering.

"My sweet, there has been a miscommunication," Snow said softly, looking uncomfortable. Aurelia glanced at Peeta, her smile fading.

"I don't understand."

"Your chosen prize is not suitable, I have learned. You will need to choose someone else."

"What do you mean, not suitable? Here he stands in front of me and I'd say he is very suitable." Sweat poured down Peeta's neck. Why couldn't Snow excuse him and discuss his lack of bedroom skills in private?

"You honor me, Miss Snow," Peeta bowed low. "But I'm afraid I would disappoint you. I have no real experience and aside from that, my heart belongs to only one woman, as it has since I was five years old. On that special occasion that I decide to give away a part of myself, it will be to her and no one else. I hope I haven't offended the lovely birthday girl with my honesty." He bowed low, chewing his lip anxiously. Aurelia's eyes softened and she let out a little sigh.

"What sweet words! Your girl is a very lucky one indeed! But please, learn how to please her before you give yourself to her. It will make it less embarrassing for you," she giggled, shooting him a wink. When did I become "girl friends" with the President's granddaughter, he asked himself in a daze.

"Lieutenant, please return to the dinner table. We will talk more later in the evening." Peeta bowed low to both Snows and briskly walked back to the table.  
Katniss nearly leaped to her feet when she saw him and he saw Haymitch's curious looks. Finnick, Johanna, and Annie were staring at him, confused. Had they all known? If Haymitch had known what almost happened, he would slit the man's throat. No, he reminded himself of the Victor's surprised look when the envelope had arrived, he couldn't have known. He had no idea when Aurelia had chosen him but he had a feeling the Victors were just waiting to hear who it was.

Feeling sick to his stomach, he took his seat beside Katniss and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. She looked at him, confused, but his eyes said later. Snow had asked about both of them. Did that mean Katniss was on Aurelia's list as well? He was definitely going to be sick.

He pushed his chair back and gripped his stomach.

"Peeta? Are you alright?"

"I need some air," he stammered as he jumped to his feet. Katniss watched, terrified, as her husband scurried across the room and out into the night air.

"I'll check on him, Mrs. Mellark," Finnick said softly, setting his napkin aside. He squeezed Annie's hand before following Peeta outside. Katniss sat back in her seat, pushing her food around her plate. In 12, Peeta was a commanding force, sometimes cold and indifferent sure, but she had seen the real man inside. Here, he was nervous and scared. Almost like the little baker's boy who took beatings from his own mother when he was younger. What was it about this place that seemed to drain her husband of his strength? What had happened to him, that everyone else seemed to know about except for her?

"What did that man say to him," she whispered in Haymitch's ear. He didn't even glance her way.

"I wouldn't know, Mrs. Mellark."

"Cut the bullshit, Haymitch," she hissed. "You know what is going on. What were the Victors talking about, a list? Why did Snow want to meet with Peeta privately?"

"Later Katniss," he said through gritted teeth. It was the first time he had actually used her first name and she was stunned. She returned to playing with her food, hoping that Peeta was alright.

* * *

Peeta gripped the balcony rail in front of him and stared up at the stars. They were similar to the ones back in 12 but Peeta couldn't relate the two places. The Capitol was like being in another world completely and he couldn't understand how they lived so differently from people in the districts. Not even District 2 had horrified him so.

"Nice night, huh," he heard a deep voice behind him and nearly jumped. What was wrong with him?! Why was he so jumpy here, all of a sudden? Finnick Odair's green eyes gleamed in the night and he leaned over the balcony next to Peeta.

"Yeah. It's… well, I was just thinking it feels the same back home."

"Have you ever been to 4, Lieutenant?" Peeta glanced at the Victor.

"Beautiful views. The smell of the sea wherever you go. Sand under your toes. And falling asleep to the sound of the waves." He sighed and closed his eyes, as if picturing his home. Peeta was sure he was.

"I've never seen anything like that."

"No, District 12 is all trees and coal, isn't it? Well, you'll have to visit sometime. Annie and I would be glad to have you and your wife."

"Annie is… your wife?"

"In all but name," he sighed. "I'm not allowed to marry. But when we are in 4, it's just her and me."

"Why can't you marry?"

"After what you saw last night, do you really have to ask that?" Peeta fell silent. He hadn't mentioned the Victors' show to anyone, wanting to forget all of it completely. But here, being so close to the young Victor, he could see Finnick's life was clearly not what he had originally thought. In the crowds he looked healthy and flirtatious and mysterious. Here under the moonlight, he looked exhausted and his eyes were sad and dull. He slumped a little, as if he had been struggling to hold himself straight all evening. His hands twitched, Peeta noticed, as if they needed something to do.

"You're a slave," he finally spoke.

"We're all slaves. I take it you discovered that when President Snow asked to speak to you?" Finnick turned and lowered his head.

"I'm sorry about last night. I hope she wasn't too traumatized."

"You saved us," he said weakly. "You stood up to the Senator."

"I did what I could. The Capitolites love to see their Victors in the spotlight but they get uneasy whenever a newcomer arrives. Like they realize that they could be next. I just appealed to them rather than the Senator. And I figured if I couldn't get you both out of it, well, I would at least try to keep you together."

"Thank you," he nodded. "She was… we're ok."

"And the conversation with President Snow? Judging by your expression, it went as I expect it did?"

"Not exactly." In a low voice, Peeta told Finnick what Snow had said about his inability to take care of a young virgin and Finnick whistled.

"Man you lucked out. I have never heard of Snow making an allowance for someone like that. Many of the Victors are virgins when they come to the Capitol. He doesn't seem to care when he sells them to the highest bidder."

"Is that… what happened to you?" Finnick glanced at Peeta but didn't answer him. Peeta couldn't blame him. It was a very personal question.

"So birthday girl has to choose someone else now?" Peeta bit his lip. He suddenly realized they both knew who Aurelia Snow would probably choose. Peeta felt terrible.

"Finnick, I'm so-"

"Oh don't get sentimental, Peeta," the Victor faked a smile. "Sentimentality has no place in the Capitol."

"Still, it's not fair."

"None of this is," the handsome man shook his head. "Still, here we are. I'd better go check on Annie. And your wife was looking pretty worried about you."

"How do you do it, Finnick?" Finnick stopped and raised his brow. "I mean, how do you bear it?" Finnick gave the peacekeeper a look of disbelief.

"I don't, Peeta! I just drag myself out of nightmares each morning and find there's no relief in waking." Peeta's horrified expression made Finnick pause.

"Better not to give in to it. It takes ten times as long to put yourself back together as it does to fall apart. The more you can distract yourself, the better. Enjoy every second with your love that you can. Bask in her smile, bathe in her loving gaze. When you leave the party tonight, don't think about this place once while you are with her. Focus all of your energy on making her happy. And just be with her, in mind and body alike. Can you do that, Peeta?" Peeta stared at him, unsure of what to say. Finally, he nodded. With a heavy sigh, Finnick turned and walked back into the mansion. Did Finnick know that Peeta was hoping to make love to Katniss tonight? How could he?

Perhaps he'd seen how much Aurelia Snow's decision had terrified him. How close he'd come to being forced to give himself to someone else, before he had a chance to experience that with Katniss.

She had said she was ready. After tonight, so was he. He no longer cared about the place. Just that he would finally be with her in the most amazing way. His palms grew damp just thinking about it.

He impatiently wiped his hands on his pants and returned to the party. Inside, his eyes landed on Katniss, who was staring at her plate with a worried expression, and he swallowed. A servant offered a tray of drinks and he took one with a nod.

"Thank y-" his eyes widened in horror as the glass slipped from his hand and shattered. The servant's eyes narrowed in recognition and Peeta stood there gaping at his former soldier. The Avox servant was Jacobson!


	31. Chapter 31

_**I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaack! I'm so sorry you guys, I had every intention to post while on my business trip but never had a spare second! I'm busy writing as we speak, so it won't be long before the next one is up, since this is a little bit of a cliffie! Thanks for all your kind words and messages! XOXOX**_

* * *

Peeta dropped to his knees to clean up the mess, avoiding the Avox's eyes.

"I'm sorry," he stammered. "So clumsy."

"Lieutenant Mellark," a voice made him wince and he saw Jacobson nearly drop his tray.

"Commander," Peeta straightened up, discreetly wiping his hands on his slacks.

"General Duartyr was looking for you. Are you trying to do the Avox's job, Mellark?"

"Uh, I dropped- it was my fault. I made the mess-"

"That's what Avoxes are there for," Thread didn't even glance at Jacobson. Peeta wondered if he even knew who it was. "Now come on. The General said it was urgent."

"Yes sir." Peeta cast Jacobson an apologetic glance before he followed his Commander into the banquet hall. The Minister stood in front of the table, motioning to General Duartyr on his left and to President Snow, who sat on his right. A line of Peacekeepers stood next to the President and there was scattered applause as one of the peacekeepers stepped forward, nodded, and smiled. Duartyr caught sight of Peeta and gestured for him to join the line. He caught Katniss's eyes and tried to give her a reassuring smile. His encounter with Jacobson had left him pale and nervous but he did his best to hide it as he stood beside his former commander.

"Continuing with our promotions tonight, President Snow would like to bestow the honor of General to Romulus Thread, former Commander of District 12. Congratulations, General." The President stood and draped a medal around Thread's neck. Thread bowed his head in thanks.

"You honor me, Mr. President."

"And finally," Duartyr motioned to Peeta and he took a tentative step towards Duartyr, who gave him a smile.

"President Snow would like to bestow the honor of Captain to Peeta Mellark, former First Lieutenant of District 12." He hardly heard the thunderous applause or noticed the president pinning a medal to his suit. He searched for Katniss in the crowd and saw her shocked face.

"Many congratulations and well wishes to the promoted officers, soldiers of Panem," President Snow announced. "We look to you all to keep our people and our nation safe." Peeta saluted the president, along with the rest of the peacekeepers, and hurried to sit down beside his wife. Haymitch thunked his glass against the table.

"Congratulations, Captain!" Peeta tried to smile, even nod in thanks, but he was frozen. He turned to look at Katniss, who was staring at his medal with wide eyes. He could see the question in her wary gaze. Why a promotion? He fumbled for her hand and brought them to rest on his knee. She noticed the other Victors watching her, so she lowered her eyes and bowed her head submissively.

"Congratulations, Captain," she said quietly. Peeta leaned over and kissed her cheek.

"It's still just Peeta," he whispered. Her hand shook in his.

He didn't hear the conversation around him. He had no idea of what was being said, his thoughts were racing so quickly all he could hear was the blood rushing to his ears. He was ready for the party to be over. He needed to talk to Katniss.

There was more eating and dancing and Peeta didn't allow himself to be separated from his wife. He politely declined the young ladies who asked him to dance. His grip on her waist tightened when any other men asked to cut in. He couldn't have cared less; he was Captain now and he was pretty sure everyone present knew they were both virgins. Let him appear the love-sick fool who wouldn't let his wife go. He was fine with it.

Until Duartyr insisted on dragging the men away for cigars and drinks. Peeta politely declined the cigar and tried to refuse the drink until it was pushed into his hand.

"Captain," Duartyr said cheerfully. "When you arrived in 2, you were a scared little boy from District 12. It did take awhile but you fit right in with the peacekeepers. And now look at you! Captain! I couldn't be prouder." The General smiled and clapped Peeta's shoulder.

"You're too kind, General," Peeta muttered.

"Now you really can't stay in 12," Thread said as he lifted his drink to his lips. Peeta's brow furrowed in confusion.

"What do you mean...sir?"

"Captains and Generals don't reside in outlying districts," Duartyr shrugged. "You'll appoint a Lieutenant, and they will report to you. You have the freedom to move around as you wish. You can actually choose your home."

"District 12 is my home, General."

"Peeta, look, the President wants his best soldiers closer to the Capitol. And you are one of his best soldiers. This is a huge opportunity for you."

"Listen boy, if it's your wife's family you are worried about, they can join you," Thread said, shooting Duartyr a look. "It's only two women, so I'm sure the President won't mind. Of course, you will be responsible for them and that would make me change my mind immediately." He chuckled, nodding to several other soldiers, who joined him in laughter. Peeta looked around and swallowed.

"I've already told my wife that I will be responsible for them. They can't afford to eat where they live, General Thread."

"Well, then I should think they would be happy to move to 2."

"Or here," Duartyr gestured to around him. "Wherever you would like to go, Peeta! Surely anywhere is better than 12."

"I have a family in 12, too, Generals," he shook his head. "I mean, my brother just got married. My parents are elderly and run the bakery by themselves. I can't just leave them."

"Peeta," Duartyr looked uncomfortable, anxious even. "You really need to relocate. It would be...beneficial for all involved."

"And that means that you need to appoint a Lieutenant," Thread nodded.

"I thought any promotions had to be approved by President Snow."

"He seems to trust you," Thread said, shrugging and chugging the rest of his drink. Duartyr cleared his throat.

"President Snow was quite intrigued to hear about your story, Peeta. Before you came to the Capitol the first time I mean. A wrestler from District 12, achieves top marks in all of his training and is promoted to higher ranks. It's quite unheard of, you understand."

"Colonel Haemon didn't want to pass me on," Peeta said bitterly. Duartyr glanced over at the Colonel across the room and cleared his throat again.

"Boy, why do you think the Colonel was not promoted and Duartyr became General?" Peeta stared at his General, while a few of the other peacekeepers shifted uncomfortably. No one else had come from 12. Most of them were from 1 and 2, some of them from 4 and one from 7. No outlying districts to speak of.

"It's because his methods were...questionable, to many. President Snow wanted to see your loyalty in other ways. He disapproved of such methods. Duartyr replaced him and found more constructive ways to test your limits. Duartyr became General while Haemon reports to him." Thread snapped his fingers and another tray of drinks was brought.

"Personally I think all of the training toughened you up and helped you become a fine soldier. You turned one of your own soldiers into an Avox. You have your training to thank for that."

"Peeta's training was not approved by the Capitol first and therefore should not have been carried out," Duartyr said in a low voice. "Thankfully, there don't seem to be any… permanent effects."

"It's approved now," Thread said and it had to be said that the smile he wore was pure evil. "The Minister of Defense is actually testing it out on prisoners right now. We will create more soldiers for the Capitol."

"You mean you'll create weapons," Peeta said, his eyes wide.

"Well, it's what we tried to do with you, after all." Duartyr decided to step in front of Peeta at the same time that Peeta surged forward. The General of 2 knew him well, and he knew Peeta was about to lose control.

"The Minister himself agreed that sort of training should not have been carried out on a soldier. Not even a soldier from 12. And I still believe it was a personal vendetta against Peeta, since no one else was a test subject. If Haemon's theory about District 12 soldiers needing conditioning more than anyone else was correct, then why did Peeta's brother not receive the same training?"

"As I recall, both Mellarks went through the same training." Peeta clenched his jaw.

"In the beginning, that's correct, sir. But Colonel Haemon informed me I would be trained separately and that's when the torture started."

"Training," Thread corrected.

"Torture, sir. No soldier in Panem has experienced what they did to me. You said yourself they are testing it on prisoners now. Prisoners, General, not Peacekeepers. I was under the impression that a Peacekeeper is a Soldier of Panem and is to be treated with a certain level of respect. I received none at the hands of Colonel Haemon. Only pain and torment. For months. He turned me into a…" he trailed off, his hands clenching and unclenching by his sides. Duartyr squeezed his shoulder once.

"I recall this being a celebration. Let us have more drinks, shall we?"

"If you'll excuse me, Generals, I would like to return to my wife." Peeta nodded to the other peacekeepers, saluted the Generals, and set the full glass back on the tray that the Avox held. He couldn't wait to be away from the group. He was grateful the other peacekeepers had no idea what his training had entailed but Duartyr and Thread knew every detail. While Duartyr clearly disapproved of it, Thread seemed to be supportive of it. The conversation with Thread had given him whiplash. One minute the General was supportive of Peeta moving out of 12, almost treating him like an equal, and the next he was calling him boy and reminding him of the torment he had endured. Almost laughing about it.

Peeta paused and reached back to massage his shoulder. He squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, his nostrils flaring. A soft hand on his made him jump and his eyes flew open.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to startle you," his wife stood in front of him, chewing her lip anxiously.

"Just the person I needed to see." He wrapped his fingers around hers and pulled her close.

"Are you alright?"

"I am now," he nodded, pulling her hand to his cheek. "I wish we could get out of here so I can just hold you. I need to hold you in my arms. I need to remind myself that you're real."

"I'm real," she said, looking bemused. "I'm right here in front of you." How many times had he seen her in his mind, struggling to cling to the image of her while his body screamed in agony? There had been too many nights that he was afraid he would forget her, what she looked like, the deep huskiness of her voice, the way she smiled when she was with her sister. He was terrified that in changing him, they would wipe away his memories of her.

"Peeta?" He opened his eyes to see the real thing in front of him. His wife. The woman he loved above all else.

He had no idea if she felt the same but he had to hope that she was allowing herself to love him. Her actions and words lately were softer, gentle, and more loving.

"I'm ok. Why don't we get some food?" She nodded and he slipped her arm under his. They trailed over toward the refreshment table, which was laden with rich foods and extravagant dishes. Peeta put a little bit of everything on his plate and stood in the corner with Katniss. His eyes found Annie Cresta, sort of swaying to the

music, alone. He looked around but did not see Finnick anywhere. His throat closed up and he gripped his plate.

"Katniss, can you take my plate and return to the table? I'll be there in just a minute."

"Al- alright," she looked confused as she took the plate from him and headed toward the dining room. She glanced over her shoulder and saw Peeta approaching the red-headed Victor, Annie Cresta. Frowning, she hiked her dress up so she could walk properly and returned to the table, where Haymitch, Johanna, and Cecilia were in conversation.

* * *

Peeta hesitantly approached the Victor, uncertain as to what he would say. Annie spun around and her eyes widened when she saw him.

"Miss Cresta, would you honor me with a dance?"

"My pleasure, Captain," she curtsied and he took her hand. She was stiff and didn't really lean into him as they danced. Not that he could blame her but his mind raced as he searched for the proper words.

"Finnick told me what happened," she said softly, and all of his thoughts disappeared.

"What do you mean?"

"He told me what you talked about. I'm glad it's not you."

"I'm so sorry, Miss Cresta."

"Annie, please. And it's alright. I've known what Finnick is forced to do for a long time. And he's very gentle. He will be… very good to Miss Snow."

"Do they make you do the same?" He hadn't meant to ask but now he had to know.

"I used to," she confessed quietly, lowering her eyes. "But Finnick made a deal and saved me from it. Now I only have to come to the Capitol for special occasions and parties. People call me mad, you know."

"Wait, you? Really?"

"I suppose in some ways it's true. We're all mad here. I'm mad. You're mad."

"How do you know I'm mad?" Peeta asked, his brow furrowed in confusion.

"You must be," Annie sighed, "or you wouldn't have come here."

"I didn't have much of a choice," he reminded her.

"We all have a choice. Do we give in to our fate, or do we resist? That is a choice in itself. You made the choice to stand up and protect Katniss last night."

"She's my wife," he argued.

"Look around you, Peeta. Here, loyalty doesn't mean much. Wives, husbands, fathers, daughters, sons, mothers… Family devotion only goes so far for most people."

"And yet it sounds like Finnick has made sacrifices for you. A girl he can't even marry." He instantly regretted it but his harsh tongue was a curse, one that came from the training camps of 2. One that he couldn't rid himself of, no matter how he tried.

"Yes," she said sadly. "Oh, I see cake. Won't you excuse me, Peeta?"

"Annie-" she was gone before he could apologize and he sighed. He wanted to go home! He wanted to be back in his little house, cooking dinner for his wife. Not here in the grandest house in the Capitol of Panem.

"Hey handsome, want to dance," asked a young woman he had never seen before. Her dress was completely see-through and she wore nothing underneath. His cheeks burned.

"Thank you, Miss, but I should be returning to my wife."

"Oh you can bring her along too. She can watch or join in, doesn't matter to me." His stomach was roiling.

"Excuse me," he said hastily, turning on his heel and fleeing from the room. Katniss was sitting between Haymitch and Cecilia, pushing something around her plate. Cecilia saw him and rose to her feet, gesturing for him to sit down.

"I can just-"

"Sit beside your wife, Captain," Cecilia said sternly, already sitting on Haymitch's other side. Peeta sank into his seat and Katniss pushed his plate toward him.

"My feet are killing me," she complained softly. "How much longer do we have to stay?"

"Not too much longer," he promised.

"So Captain Mellark, who will you appoint as Lieutenant," Haymitch asked, lifting his glass.

"I haven't really had time to think about it," he said quietly. "I mean, I wasn't aware I would be the one to choose someone."

"Your brother is the obvious choice," Haymitch continued. "But Darius has been stationed in 12 a lot longer. Whoever you choose, I know he will represent 12 well."

"Darius would be a great choice, if I knew where to find him."

"Perhaps you should mention it to Minister Antonius, since you would like to make him your Lieutenant." Peeta's eyes narrowed, searching the Victor's. It didn't escape him that they were the same shade as his wife's. Most Seam people had grey eyes but he had often forgotten that District 12's Victor came from the Seam.

"Excellent idea, Mr. Abernathy. I will find him when we finish dinner."

* * *

Even though Aurelia had long since disappeared, the party continued late into the night. Katniss yawned into her glass and Peeta's head felt fuzzy. Haymitch had excused himself and Peeta had a sneaking suspicion that he had retreated to his room with a large bottle. He was about to tell Katniss they were leaving, when an Avox approached them. He bowed his head and pointed to Peeta and Katniss. He held a red envelope and Peeta stood.

"President Snow is requesting to meet with us?" The Avox nodded, bowing even lower. Katniss stood, looking panic-stricken. He took her hand and kissed her knuckles.

"It will be alright," he whispered. Straight backed and solemn, Peeta lead them into the next room, where the President was sitting in a comfortable looking white chair. He rose to his feet when he saw the two enter the room and Peeta bowed low while Katniss swept into a curtsy that she was convinced she wouldn't be able to get back up from.

"President Snow, my wife, Katniss Mellark."

"Mrs. Mellark," the old man took her hand. She swallowed the desire to flinch and run away. "An honor."

"The honor is mine, I assure you, sir," she bowed her head.

"Yes, I can see why Captain Mellark is taken with you. You have been the talk of the party, Mrs. Mellark. I do hope the Captain passed on my sincerest apologies for last night."

"Oh...he did, sir, that's very-"

"It was reckless of my son," Snow waved his gloved hand. "But he was taken with you when he saw you enter the room and thought you would be a lovely addition to the show. Boys will be boys, after all. However, it has been dealt with and I do hope you can forget." Katniss was so disgusted she feared she would throw up if she opened her mouth. Luckily her husband, ever the wordsmith, came to her rescue.

"Your graciousness is much appreciated, President Snow. We thank you for your kind words. Neither Katniss nor I were harmed last night, and that's all that matters."

"I had planned on sending champagne and oysters to your room this evening but I was informed you switched rooms last night. Was there a problem?"

"Oh, unfortunately the hotel staff found an… infestation in our room and moved us immediately. I did not think to tell you because I didn't want to inconvenience you."

"My soldiers should be comfortable when they visit my home," the president said lightly. "Is your new room satisfactory?"

"It is, sir, thank you."

"Good. And how are you liking the Capitol, Mrs. Mellark?"

"Oh it's beautiful, sir. So much bigger and grander than I could have imagined. I'm grateful for the opportunity to experience this."

"As Captain, your husband now has freedom to choose where he will reside. You can stay in the Capitol, if you wish. 12 is not suitable for a soldier of his rank."

"General Duartyr just informed me of this tonight," Peeta said quickly, seeing the look on Katniss's face. "I planned to discuss it with my wife when we return to our room."

"Well. I won't keep you any longer, then. You two have much to discuss and I daresay, more interesting activities to be engaged in instead of talking to an old man." Snow chuckled and clapped Peeta's shoulder. Peeta willed his blush away but he could tell Katniss was confused.

"Good night, sir, and thank you again for the invitation."

"Have a pleasant evening, Captain Mellark. Mrs. Mellark." Katniss curtsied again as Snow retreated from the room and nearly fell into Peeta's arms.

"Easy," he said soothingly. "It's over. You did amazing."

"Can we leave now?"

"I need to find Minister Antonius and then yes, we can go." He squeezed her hand and lead her back to the ballroom. His eyes scanned the room but did not see the Minister. He sighed and decided he would try to contact him in the morning to ask about Darius.

"OK, let's get out of here." His hand rested on Katniss's back as he escorted her out. He caught Duarty'r eye before they left and the General winked. Peeta swallowed, nodded to his former Commander, and stepped out into the night air, breathing for what felt like the first time that evening.

* * *

Peeta held Katniss's hand the entire ride and she nearly jumped out of the car when it stopped in front of the hotel. She was impatient as he struggled to open their door, and she kicked the shoes off as soon as they entered. One of the heels made a loud THUD against the wall.

"Oops," she said though she looked like she didn't really care.

"I need to wash this stuff off," he shook his head. "How about a shower? Or we can take another bath, if you like?"

"That sounds nice. Let me get out of this dress."

"Need any help?" She nodded and turned, presenting him with her back. He lowered the zipper, his lips meeting her shoulder. She shivered as he pulled the dress down.

"You did amazing tonight," he whispered, moving her hair off her neck.

"And you're a Captain now. All I kept hearing was Captain Mellark over and over."

"I'll always be just Peeta, to you," he reminded her, nuzzling her cheek.

"The boy with the bread," she reminded him. He lifted his head and stared at her.

"Did you really think of me?" She turned to face him and he swallowed thickly. Her corset pushed her creamy breasts up and all he wanted to do right now was bury his face in them.

"I may not have realized it at first but yes, I thought of you. A lot. I hated myself for not thanking you when I had the chance. But now, I can thank you any time." He opened his mouth to say something but he let out a choked gasp as she fell to her knees and worked at his belt buckle.

"Ka-...Katniss, you don't need-"

"What I need, is you," she said, pulling his slacks down his hips and leaning in to kiss his toned stomach. "And I'm sorry it's taken me so long to realize it." He tried to speak but her smooth hand grasped him and pulled him from his underwear. His head dropped back, his mouth wide open.

"I love how fast you get turned on," she went on, studying his cock. His eyes went back to hers and they were soft and hazy. "We can just be talking but if I touch you, you're so hard immediately."

"It doesn't really take much, when you're involved," he said weakly.

"Really? You can just think of me and it… it happens?" He nodded, reaching down to stroke her shoulder.

"You were pretty much the star of every fantasy I had growing up," he confessed. "And like I said, they don't compare to the real thing." He released something between a gasp and a sob as her tongue touched him and he struggled to pull her to her feet.

"Katniss, if tonight is going to go where I think it might go, I can't have you doing that."

"I thought you liked it," she bit her lip.

"Like is an understatement. I lose all fucking control when you touch me. But I don't want tonight to end so quickly. Let's, um… let's take a shower and just… take it slow."

"I want to touch you, Peeta," she pouted. "Why are you wanting to take this slow? Aren't girls the ones who get all emotional about their first time and the guys are just ready to do it?"

"Not this guy," he shook his head. "Don't group me with those asshole Merchant boys who took Seam girls to the slag heap. I'm not like that and I'll never be like that. Excuse me for wanting to treat my girl… my wife, right." He bitterly remembered his first fight in school, when David Kavr was saying crude things about some of the girls in their class. When he started on Katniss, Peeta had lost it. He was afraid he would be suspended but he was signed up for wrestling not long afterwards. His mother, of course, had slapped him until his face was raw.

"I'm sorry," she said softly. "I just… never thought about sex. I didn't have time to think about it. I thought it was dumb when I heard the girls talking about the slag heap. Why would someone willingly put themselves through that? But I want it… with you. I don't want you thinking it's not important to me." She blew out a breath and crossed her arms over her chest.

"I'm scared. Not just of it hurting but being vulnerable in front of you. In front of anyone, really, but you've… you've seen me at my worst."

"Which is why you shouldn't feel scared to be vulnerable with me," he said gently, cupping her chin. "We're vulnerable to each other. I've been more open with you than I ever have with anyone else. And I'll gladly expose every part of myself, if it means you can trust me to take care of you. In mind, body, and soul, I love you and everything you are, Katniss. As for the pain… I'll do everything I can to make it good for you. I've heard that… it can hurt the first time but we will go slow and I'll be gentle. And if you're not ready tonight, we'll wait."

"No," she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed her forehead to his. "I'm ready. I mean, if you were able to find something to protect us." His face fell and he mentally kicked himself. He had meant to go out earlier and find something. Katniss looked disappointed and bit her lip.

"Peeta… I can't. I can't risk it. I'm never having kids. I won't watch them attend a Reaping."

"Katniss," his teeth dug into his lip. "The contract does state that IF we have children, they're safe from the Reaping. Peacekeepers' children aren't eligible for the Hunger Games."

"That's only if the President doesn't change the rules. And even if they're not going into the Games, they're sent off for training to be a Peacekeeper!"

"That's nowhere near as bad as the Games."

"Really? Care to tell me about your training then?" He was silent and she nodded.

"That's what I thought."

"It's not that I don't want to tell you," he protested. "I've just...tried to block it from my memory."

"Everyone knows but me. I mean, I should know what happened to my own husband."

"The only people who know everything are my superiors. Not even Rye knows every detail."

"That's not the point, Peeta. I can't have kids. So unless you have something to keep that from happening, I guess we're waiting. Condoms are really hard to find in the district but I bet I can get some from the Hob."

"I can probably find some tomorrow," he sighed. "Why don't you go ahead and start the bath? I just need a minute." She nodded and dug some clothes out of her bag before disappearing into the bathroom. Huffing, Peeta glanced down and his eyes narrowed.

"I can ignore you, you know."

"What," she called from the bathroom.

"Nothing. Talking to myself!" He sighed as he pulled his bag toward him and lifted his clothes to find some clean underwear. His eyes widened at the little box at the bottom of his bag. His fingers shook as he emptied the box and stared at the contents. A note fell out of the box and he yanked it up.

 _Peet-_

 _Madge's dad snuck these to us but we both feel that you could use them more. I hope the Capitol is treating you well, and your blue balls haven't killed you yet._

Peeta rolled his eyes but kept reading.

 _Whenever you do decide to use these, I know it will be the best night of your life. Because you've carried a torch for that girl for so long, they should give you a medal for patience._

 _Don't use them all at once! And remember, she may be sore after the first time. Ease her into it so you can enjoy it. Play with her a lot before you do the deed._

"For gods sake, Ryen," he said under his breath.

 _And remember to jerk off before you do, so you can last longer. Last thing you want is to be inside her for the first time and explode the first 30 seconds! Make it good for her. Leave her wanting more._

 _Madge is giving me a dirty look so I guess she knows what I'm writing. I'll see you when you get back, baby bro!_

 _Rye_

Peeta fingered one of the condoms and inhaled sharply. Their conversation had put a damper on things but he still wanted her. He was terrified of disappointing her but he was sure he could figure it out. Why had Madge and Rye decided he needed them more, though? He doubted they would abstain. He loved his brother but he definitely wasn't innocent, and he wasn't too sure about Madge either. Were they already sleeping together, so they didn't really care? Did Madge want children?

He shook the thoughts away, closing his hand around the package. Taking a deep breath, he shoved it in his pocket and grabbed his clothes. He could hear the running water and pictured the corset dropping around Katniss's feet. It only took a few seconds before he was hard again and he groaned.

"Seriously?" He tucked the clothes under his arm, closed his eyes and inhaled, before pushing the bathroom door open.


	32. Chapter 32

He wanted to burst out laughing at the sight. It definitely wasn't as graceful as he had envisioned. Katniss had one arm out and somehow, one arm under the corset. Her back was red and she looked like she was ready to cry.

"Help me," she said desperately.

"Come here," he said gently, setting his clothes on the toilet seat. He frowned at the corset, with its never ending stays and zippers. Katniss groaned and jumped up and down in place when he paused to inspect it closer.

"Ok, just hold on. What the hell is with this thing?"

"These Capitol people are crazy," she snapped. "I'm losing all feeling in my arm!"

"How did you- ok, let's try this." He was able to maneuver the material and slipped her arm free. Instead of dropping around her feet, he tugged the corset over her head and gently kissed the red marks it had left behind. She crossed her arm over her chest and hid her face in her hand.

"Ugh."

"Want me to help with the rest?" She didn't answer so he knelt to roll the stockings down her feet. Her underwear were tied together with tiny ribbons and he wet his lips as he glanced up at her. She was peeking through her hands, her wide eyes finding his. He fingered the bow and held her gaze.

"What do you want, Katniss?" He was letting her decide. She could tell him to take them off so she could get into the bath, or she could tell him to take them off with his teeth. He decided to let her choose, and if she chose the latter, he could ease them both back into the mood. He ran his palms up her shapely legs and he moved closer on his knees. He couldn't keep himself from leaning forward and kissing her stomach, above her panties. Her eyes fluttered closed and her tongue darted across her lips.

"Katniss," her eyes opened and he rested his chin against her stomach. "What do you want?"

"What do I-?"

"Do you want me to help you take these off so you can get into the bath?" Her mouth moved wordlessly.

"Do you want me to help you take these off so I can tongue-fuck you until you can't see straight?" Her knees buckled at his words. She swallowed as his fingers moved closer to the bow.

"Do you want to take these off yourself and I will leave you to shower alone?" He wrapped his arms around her waist and waited.

"What do you want," he said again.

"What do you want?"

"This isn't about me. And I don't think enough people ask you what you want. So I'm asking." She bit her lip as she watched him, her eyes steely with resignation.

"Take them off," she said in a husky tone.

He turned his attention to the bows at both sides and he gently pulled at one. Glancing up at her, he leaned forward and tugged at the other with his teeth. The material dropped to the floor and he was gazing right at her wet curls. He could smell her arousal and his cock twitched in his pants. His belt and slacks were still undone, and even though he had tucked himself back into his underwear, he knew there would be a spot of wet on his slacks. At least they were black, he reasoned.

He nuzzled at her inner thigh with his nose before tilting his face and sliding his tongue up her folds. She grabbed his hair, which made him twitch again. He lifted her leg and draped it over his shoulder, opening her up even more. His hands slid around to cup her ass, pushing her against his mouth. He swore she had pulled some of his hair out, the way she was gripping it in her fists and he moaned deeply, the vibrations making her throw her head back and scream. He reached into his slacks and closed his hand around his shaft, moaning again. Katniss bucked her hips, and he encouraged her to ride his mouth. He stiffened his tongue and thrust inside, feeling her inner walls actually clamp down around his tongue.

"Fuck you're glorious," he growled, squeezing himself even tighter. She lazily opened her eyes and lowered her leg. Her eyes narrowed at his hand in his pants and she scowled.

"So it's ok for you to touch yourself but not for me to touch you? How is that fair?"

"You want to touch me?" He pulled her hand down and covered it with his own.

"I've said that several times, haven't I?"

"Then touch me. Take what you want."

"I want… I want you to stroke yourself." His brow quirked and he was even more confused when she settled herself on the toilet seat. She draped one leg over the other and crossed her arms.

"Show me, Peeta. Just pretend I'm not here. That you're at home thinking about me. I want to watch." He stared at her, swallowing, before he tugged his pants and underwear down and threw them aside. He sat in front of her, his legs stretched out in front of him, and he licked his palm before he wrapped his hand around himself again. It took him a moment, before he felt comfortable enough to proceed. After all, as familiar as he was with this particular act, having someone else's eyes on him during the act was brand new. He glanced up at her, his teeth digging into his lip, before he closed his eyes. Whether she was in his thoughts or right in front of him, Katniss was always there.

He started out slow, every now and again squeezing his balls before moving back up to twist around the angry looking head. Katniss watched with rapt fascination. Peeta's boyish blush made her love it all the more, her eyes locked on his closed fist. His eyes were squeezed shut, his face screwed up in what could be pain but she knew it was pleasure that made him moan like that. She wanted to watch but she also wanted to be the one to bring him to paradise. She dropped to her knees, pushing his hand away and taking him deep in her throat.

"Oh my fuck," he cried out, his fingers digging into the bath mat. "Katniss! Shit, I'm going to-!" She sucked hard and felt his salty release on her tongue. He spent more than he usually did and she pulled her mouth off of him, squeezing her eyes shut when she felt wet on her face. He threw his hand back to catch himself from falling backwards, his other hand covering himself.

"Shit, I'm so sorry Katniss. Here." He pulled a towel from the rack and hastily wiped at her face.

"It's fine, Peeta."

"Oh my god, I can't move. You are incredible, you know that?"

"So you keep telling me."

"I'll keep telling you until you believe me." He rubbed his face with his hand and sighed. "The water's probably cold now. Let me empty it and we can run some more hot water." She was about to protest that it would be fine but she tingled all over and had to admit, a hot bath sounded wonderful. She went to the mirror and started pulling at the long eyelashes as Peeta refilled the tub with steaming water. He appeared behind her as she was wiping the make up from her eyes.

"My girl on fire," he said softly, wrapping an arm around her waist. "I actually like the sound of that."

"I thought the dress would burst into flame every time I moved," she shook her head. "And I don't think this red will just wash out of my hair."

"We can wash it a couple of times. Come here," he tugged her hand and pulled her into the bathtub. She sat in front of him, scooting to the side so her back was to the cold wall and not against him.

"What are you doing," he laughed as she winced at the cold tile.

"I don't want to hurt your… I don't want to crush you."

"Get over here," he pulled her into his arms and rested his chin on her shoulder. He gently washed her with a cloth and she closed her eyes as he cupped his hand and allowed hot water to drip down her neck. His lips followed and she shivered, despite the heat.

"It's getting late," he mumbled against her skin. "Do you want to head to bed soon?"

"Let me get these stupid things off of you first," she laughed, twisting around to peel the jewels from his face.

"Ow. Thanks."

"Do not say 'ow' until you wear one of those things," she pointed at the corset in disgust. He snorted.

"Since I don't plan on ever wearing one, I concede. Damn, you still have marks all over you." His fingers gently traced the markings the corset had left on her shoulders and back.

"I think you're wearing more makeup than I was," she picked up the cloth and gently stroked his face. He closed his eyes and allowed her to wash him, sighing when she ran her fingers through his hair. She quietly moved to the side and repositioned him so that she could wash his hair. She secretly loved to do this for him. The strands were like spun gold beneath her fingertips, and she didn't miss how he released breathy sighs as her fingernails scratched his scalp.

"Let's rinse it." She pulled at the adjustable shower and covered his eyes as she rinsed the suds. Peeta took his turn, gently lathering the shampoo into her hair and rinsing it away. It took three washes but he let out a triumphant cry as the last of the red washed down the drain.

"Good thing too because I think we're running out of hot water." He hurriedly shut it off and grabbed a towel for her. She stepped out and was met with a burst of warm air.

"I forgot to bring in clothes. You need me to bring yours?"

"I brought mine in with me," he nodded to his clothes on the sink. She wrapped the towel around her and stepped into the bedroom. Her bag was next to his on the bed and she pulled it toward her, digging through. Her eyes fell to the little box beside his bag and her jaw dropped. She glanced over her shoulder to see if he was out of the bathroom yet, and turned back to the condoms. He had gotten some. Why had he lied? Had he changed his mind? Was he not ready? She'd been so consumed with thoughts of being ready, she hadn't stopped to consider that he might not be. She bit her lip and heard his loud footsteps entering the room. She pulled her panties on and slipped into a gown Madge had given her. It was silky smooth, and her favorite shade of green. It stopped right above her knees but she loved the way it felt against her warm skin. She glanced at the box of condoms again before walked around and climbed onto the other side of the bed. Peeta let out a contented sigh as he stuffed his dirty clothes into his bag. Katniss watched him from the corner of her eye to see what he would do with the condoms. It took a moment before he noticed them and he seemed to be anxiously deciding how to react. He cleared his throat and stuffed them into his bag, along with a piece of paper that was underneath it.

"You ok?" She crossed her arms over her chest.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I'm just wondering when we can go home. I didn't really ask Thread or Duartyr tonight. And I know you're anxious to get back to Prim."

"So are they making you move to another district?" He sighed, looking pained, as he tossed the bag onto the floor.

"Tomorrow I'm going to try to have a private conversation with General Duartyr. I felt like he was trying to tell me something but couldn't, with Thread there."

"I thought he and Thread were on the same side."

"It's… complicated," Peeta shook his head as he massaged the back of his neck. "Duartyr is more…"

"Trustworthy?"

"I was going to say just. Duartyr doesn't abuse his power, like a lot of higher ranking Peacekeepers. He is loyal to Panem but he doesn't lord over the districts. The citizens of 2 considered themselves lucky when he was their commander. I'm not exactly sure of where he came from but he replaced my first commander and he… well, he helped me a lot. He took a liking to me, I guess, and took me under his wing." Peeta knelt on the bed and rubbed his knees. He looked anxious and he reached for Katniss's hand.

"Katniss, my training in 2… it wasn't normal. Commander Haemon had some sort of grudge against me from the moment he laid eyes on me."

"Haemon? That Colonel that spoke to you last night?"

"The same." Katniss remembered how pale and terrified Peeta looked when the man addressed him.

"What did he do to you?"

"He tortured me. It was… a method that was still new to the Capitol. He claimed that as I came from 12, I needed more conditioning. That I needed to forget about my past and where I'd come from."

"But how did he think he could make you forget?" Peeta swallowed and squeezed his eyes shut. Katniss could see how he started to shake, his fingers trembling in hers. She lay her other hand on top of his and tugged him closer.

"Never mind. You can tell me when you're ready." He gave her a weak smile and pulled her into his arms. He lay his cheek against her hair and closed his eyes. She was so small in his grasp, so delicate. He was terrified if she knew the truth about him, she would run far away.

"So you were saying," she gently pulled away. "Before we started talking about your former commander. You were saying something about General Duartyr."

"Yeah. Well, tonight when we were discussing my promotion, Thread was the one who said I couldn't stay in 12. Duartyr was trying to stress that it would be good for everyone if we moved out of 12. I didn't quite understand it."

"But my family-"

"Can come with us," he said gently. "If we have to move, Thread said your mother and Prim can come with us. I'd be claiming responsibility for all three of you, which I'm fine with. If that's what you want."

Claiming responsibility. She doubted Peeta understood when he had wanted to marry her all of these years that she came with such baggage. It made her sound like a burden.

"Snow said the same thing. It sounds like you don't have a choice, Peeta."

"High ranking Peacekeepers reside around the Capitol, 1 and 2. Sometimes 4 as well. The way Finnick was talking, I think I'd love to go to 4."

"But your family. The bakery. Your brother and Madge. You can just...leave them?"

"I don't want to, Katniss. But this promotion… I don't know what it means just yet. I need to follow the rules, for now at least. All of us do." He flipped the covers and slid under them, propping his back against the pillow.

"I think you'd like 2. It's really beautiful."

"So… if we move to 2 with you, what will happen after that?" He frowned, sitting up to wrap his arms around his knees.

"What do you mean?"

"What happens to my family and me when the contract is up?" Peeta stiffened and his eyes flew back to her. It was the first time in what felt like ages that either of them had mentioned the contract. That damned piece of paper haunted his dreams. They had left it open ended so that it could be extended if they wanted but five years was all it took, and then she was free to go. Peeta's heart ached.

 _Told you, came that nasty voice in his head. She's just putting up with you for the contract. She's using you. She'll never love you._

Stop it, he told himself, shaking his head. Katniss didn't notice the pained expression on his face as her eyes were lowered to the blanket. His fingernails dug into his palms.

 _You're a monster. You're a Capitol mutt. They turned you into something that doesn't deserve love. You don't deserve her._

"Please," he whispered, squeezing his eyes closed. Katniss looked back at him and her eyes widened.

"Peeta, what's wrong?" His hands were pressed to the sides of his head and he was trembling all over.

 _You could end it. Teach her a lesson. Kill her._

"NO! Leave me alone!" She shrank back, her hand extended toward him. He hit himself in the head and she gaped in terror.

"Peeta, please! Tell me how to help you!" He shook his head and curled into himself, his knees tucked to his chest like a small child. He hid his face and she could hear his whimpers. She wanted to run. Find a place to hide and forget everything. She wanted to run to her woods, where she could climb a tree and never come down. Perhaps she would sprout feathers and grow wings. She would become a magnificent bird and would fly far away from District 12. From Panem. She would disappear into the Wilds and would forget all she had left behind.

No she wouldn't. Bird or human, she would never forget Prim. And Peeta was so deeply lodged into her heart that she knew she would never be able to leave him. Even when those five years were up, she would find a place near him so she could see him every day. Or she would extend the contract; keep extending it until their deaths.

So stupid, she scolded herself. Why did you have to bring up that stupid contract?

She loved him. She knew it but she didn't know how to tell him. Just open your mouth and hope the words come out, she pleaded to herself. He deserves to know! He deserves to hear. He deserves everything!

"Peeta…" she watched him rocking back and forth, feeling helpless.

 _Deep in the meadow, under the willow._  
 _A bed of grass, a soft green pillow._  
 _Lay down your head, and close your eyes._  
 _And when they open, the sun will rise._

The lyrics drifted from her mouth without her realizing it at first. Peeta loved her singing. He had told her that her voice had taken him away to a different time and place. She needed him back here with her. She needed to save him from whatever dark place he was in right now. She moved closer, reaching out to touch his shoulder.

 _Here it's safe, and here it's warm._  
 _Here the daisies guard you from every harm._  
 _Here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true._

Peeta sniffled but didn't lift his head. She moved around behind him and wrapped her arms around his solid frame. She buried her face in his shirt and inhaled his smell. She gently lifted his head so she could sing in his ear.

 _Here is the place where I love you._

She kissed his temple, and pushed his curls back out of his face. He was stiff but started to relax under her caresses. This was the lullaby she always sang to Prim. It was the lullaby she remembered her father singing to her when she was just a baby in his arms.

 _Deep in the meadow, hidden far away._  
 _A cloak of green, a moon beam ray._  
 _Forget your woes, and let your troubles lay._  
 _And when again it's morning, they'll wash away._

Peeta dropped his head back onto her shoulder and she tightened her hold on him. His adam's apple bobbed and she tenderly wiped his tears away.

 _Here it's safe, and here it's warm._  
 _Here the daisies guard you from every harm._  
 _Here your dreams are sweet, and tomorrow brings them true._  
 _Here is the place where I love you._

She finished the song with a tender kiss to his jaw. He swallowed again and turned his head. The tension had flowed out of him, as his body curled into hers. She pulled the pillow down so he could rest his head comfortably and he inhaled deeply, shuddering while he exhaled the way one does when one has had a good, long, exhausting cry. Katniss reached back to turn the light off and settled her head beside his. She gently stroked his cheek and smiled. He really was beautiful. His lashes fluttered in the dark and he seemed to have fallen asleep. Katniss tucked her head under his chin and grasped his hand under the blanket.

"Where I love you," she whispered as her exhaustion took over.

* * *

Peeta's body ached when he woke up, though he didn't altogether understand why. Katniss was turned on her side, though practically on top of him. She hadn't occupied her side of the bed at all, he could tell. They had obviously fallen asleep in each other's arms because his arm was trapped underneath her and her leg was tucked under his. The urge to use the bathroom was getting stronger and he gently disentangled himself before rolling to the other side of the bed so not to wake her. He hurried into the bathroom and shut the door.

After washing his hands, he glanced in the mirror and grimaced. What the hell had happened last night? He looked a mess!

We didn't… have sex last night. There's no way. His face screwed up as he tried to remember. No, he was fairly certain he would remember if that had happened!

He glanced at his hands and saw bloody marks where he had dug his nails into his flesh. The last time he had done that…

His eyes widened in realization and he covered his face. Katniss singing. He remembered her song as she held him.

"You're pathetic," he told his reflection. "You're a Peacekeeper and a Captain at that. What has Mom always told you? Boys aren't supposed to cry. They're supposed to fight through their feelings." Even as he said it, his nose wrinkled in disgust. He remembered his mother standing over him when he had burned himself on the oven and had run to her with tears in his eyes. She snapped at him that boys didn't cry.

"When I have a child, I will only show him or her patience and love and understanding. I'll hold them to my chest and let them cry." He winced as he realized what he had said. Katniss had made her feelings about children clear. The only way he would have a child was if it was with someone other than Katniss.

And he wouldn't allow himself to think about that.

He gasped as he remembered the box of condoms that Rye had sent with him and wondered if Katniss had seen them before he'd shoved them into his bag.

Deciding he couldn't stall any longer, he opened the bathroom door and stepped out. Katniss was lying on her back, staring at the ceiling. She lifted her head when he approached the bed and she raised a brow.

"Hi," he said uncertainly.

"Hi."

"Um. Did you sleep alright?"

"Yeah. Good. You?"

"Me too, I mean yeah, good." She nodded and leaned back against the bed. He blew out a breath and ran a hand through his messy hair.

"Katniss, about last night-"

"You don't need to be embarrassed, Peeta. I sometimes have panic attacks too."

"Um… what?"

"I assume that's what was happening to you. I mean, you didn't seem to know where you were and when I started to sing to you, you sort of collapsed into my arms."

"I… that's not… I mean…" he groaned in frustration and Katniss frowned, bemused.

"That's not what I was referring to," he shook his head. "I know you saw the box on the bed."

"You mean the box of condoms that you didn't have when I asked?" He huffed as she sat up straighter.

"You can just tell me if you're not ready, Peeta. I thought we agreed not to lie to each other."

"I didn't lie! I mean, I don't know if I'm… ok, let me start over. I didn't lie to you. I didn't go out and buy them. But when I was looking through my bag, I found them at

the bottom. Rye and Madge gave them to us."

"They're a newly married couple too," she said, her brow furrowing even more. "Why would they give those up?"

"I prefer not to think about it, to be honest. I just wanted you to know that I didn't lie about having them… I mean, when I found them, we weren't really… in the mood anymore and I didn't want to bring it up. But I'm pretty sure you saw them and we got onto other, more serious topics and I just… didn't want you to get the wrong impression." She nodded, playing with her hands in her lap. She had gotten the wrong impression, after all. She'd seen them and automatically assumed he had changed his mind. She knew she needed to start talking to him before reacting. They both needed to communicate better.

"So do you think we can go home today?"

"Not likely today but maybe tomorrow. I need to contact the Minister today to discuss Darius. It troubles me that we haven't seen either him or Rosalie this entire trip." And just like that, last night was put out of both of their minds. Katniss jumped up and dressed quickly while Peeta brushed his teeth and changed into a nice pair of blue slacks and a black button up shirt. He rolled the sleeves up his arms a little and Katniss's eyes locked on his arms.

"Want me to order some breakfast while you contact the Minister?"

"That would be great, thank you," he nodded gratefully. She grabbed the menu and went into the living room where there was another phone to use. When she returned, Peeta was speaking in a low voice.

"Yes, I understand. Yes, that's preferable. Good. I'll see to the arrangements. We did meet with him last night. Yes sir. Alright, yes please pass on the message. I'll be there shortly. Thank you sir." He hung up and Katniss cocked her head.

"Did you get a hold of him?"

"General Duartyr is meeting with him and said for me to come on over when we finish with breakfast. I would prefer if you weren't there, though. Whatever fascination the Minister has with you bothers me. So I want to keep you as far away from him as I can. I'll meet you somewhere afterward, if you like."

"I'll just stay here," she waved around the room. "Find something to do."

"I won't be long," he assured her but was interrupted by a knock at the door. The Avox bowed low as he rolled a cart in and Peeta thanked him quietly.

"It's awful that they're all servants to the Capitol," she shook her head as she picked up a piece of fruit.

"Some jobs are worse than others. I think working in a hotel is much better than being in the sewers."

"They make people work underground?" She thought of her father and all of the miners, who had to travel deep underground for their work.

"Some of them do," he nodded, tearing off a piece of croissant and dipping it into his hot chocolate. "Avoxes are common in the Capitol. They fill all sorts of jobs."

"Have you seen Jacobson while we've been here?" He choked on his bite and she hastily passed him a glass of water.

"Sorry. That was dumb to ask."

"No," he gasped, his eyes watering. "It wasn't dumb. Yes, I saw him. Last night."

"What?"

"He was a servant at the party. I don't think Thread recognized him, although he definitely recognized us."

"That's terrible. Did you say anything to him?"

"I didn't really have time. Thread dragged me away to be promoted. I didn't see him after that." He had briefly entertained the thought that Jacobson had been placed there just to shake him but he had dismissed the thought. Jacobson was an Avox. A servant to the Capitol, and to Snow. It wasn't unusual that he was placed at the party of the year.

"I'd better get going," he stood and leaned over to kiss her. He still felt awkward from the night before and his lips landed on her forehead.

"I'll be back soon."

"Be sa-" she stopped, whirling around at the sound of the phone. Peeta frowned and went to answer it. His brow furrowed even deeper as he lowered the phone from his ear.

"It's for you." She looked puzzled as she accepted the phone from him.

"Hello?"

"Good morning Katniss. This is Cinna."

"Oh… hi."

"I hope I'm not interrupting anything."

"No, you're not," Katniss glanced over at Peeta, who was watching with his arms crossed over his chest. "Um, what can I… do for you?"

"I'm calling to invite you and Peeta on a hike. My friend and I try to drive out of the city every week and hike to this waterfall. It's really beautiful and I thought you would enjoy it. Would you like to join us?" She didn't really want to stay locked in the hotel room while Peeta attended his meeting so she glanced over at him and asked Cinna to hold on for a moment. Peeta's brow quirked.

"He invited me to go hiking with him."

"Did he?"

"Well, he invited both of us but you have your meeting. It would give me something to do while you're at the Minister's. If you don't mind." Peeta's jaw twitched unpleasantly.

"I'd feel better if you just stayed here." Katniss's face darkened.

"And I'd feel better outside. I'm not something to be kept locked up."

"Of course you're not, but if-"

"Yes Cinna, I'd love to come with you and your friend," she said into the phone. Peeta inhaled sharply.

"Wonderful. We will pick you up at your hotel in half an hour. Dress warmly. It's a bit chilly near the mountains."

"Alright, thank you. I'll see you soon." She hung up and turned to face her husband, tilting her chin defiantly as if to challenge him.

"I don't think this is such a good idea," he said quietly.

"I will be with Cinna and his friend. I'll be fine."

"Katniss-" He cut off, looking irritated at the knock that interrupted him. He stomped to the door and threw it open.

"Haymitch," he nodded stiffly.

"Morning to you too. I wanted to see if you'd found anything out about Darius yet."

"I'm meeting with General Duartyr and Minister Antonius shortly. I'll inform you of what I find out." Haymitch's brow raised and he glanced over at Katniss, then back to Peeta.

"I was able to make arrangements for our trip home. We leave the day after tomorrow."

"Splendid. We're both ready to return to 12."

"Are you taking sweetheart out for any fun plans today?"

"I have a meeting," Peeta said in a clipped voice. "And Katniss has made alternative arrangements to spend time with her… friend." Katniss scowled and Haymitch looked like he was trying not to laugh.

"Alright, well, I'm off to have lunch with some of the Victors before they leave. Cecilia and Porter are headed home this afternoon. You both are welcome to join us for dinner tonight, if you like."

"That will depend on when Katniss's venture ends. I'm not altogether comfortable with her leaving the city with another man but clearly my opinion makes no difference to her."

"Oh, grow up, Peeta," she snapped as she stormed past him. Peeta glared at her retreating back, his fingers tightening on the door. Haymitch shook his head.

"Brr. You two have a lot of warming up to do before showtime." Peeta's scowl rivaled his wife's.

"What is that supposed to mean," he snapped.

"President Snow has asked to meet with some of the Victors tomorrow morning. Several Peacekeepers are included in that meeting." Peeta paled immediately.

"Meaning me."

"And the Captain's wife as well," Haymitch nodded. Peeta rubbed his face furiously.

"We just want to go home, Haymitch. We want this to be over!" Haymitch entered the room and shut the door behind him.

"Soon, kid. Soon."

"Not soon enough," Peeta muttered. "Fine. Breakfast with the President and then I somehow need to convince my wife to spend time with me instead of with Cinna."

"Cinna? That's who she's spending the day with?" For some reason, Haymitch looked amused and it didn't make Peeta feel any better.

"What is the problem, Haymitch?"

"I could ask you the same thing. Peeta, you're not actually jealous, are you?"

"He's a stranger to us. And he is a bit more familiar with her than I am comfortable with."

"She needs a friend," the Victor shook his head. "And you don't have anything to be jealous about. Nothing will happen between your wife and Cinna."

"That's what Portia said too but she left out the why."

"Why doesn't matter," Haymitch growled. "You should trust your wife."

"I do trust her. I just know how Capitol men can be, and am feeling very protective of her after everything we have seen the past few days."

"I'm sure Cinna will tell Katniss… never mind. Just don't worry so much, kid. She'll be fine. Being out in the fresh air will do her some good. She's a wood sprite, like her father was."

"You mean they're illegal hunters."

"No, I mean they come alive outside. I watched Ash literally bloom into a different person the first time he took me beyond the fence. Maybe Katniss will take you in there one day."

"I'm a Peacekeeper. I can't be seen beyond the fence. And I've forbidden her from going there anymore."

"Yeah, good luck with that," Haymitch chuckled. "Kind of like Ash being caught and whipped. He was back in the woods as soon as he was healed. Course he was lucky he wasn't caught with any game or his bow. It would have been so much worse. But my point is, she's his daughter and you can't change her. She's spent most of her life out in those woods. The Capitol isn't the same, by any means, but it will be good for her. Cinna and Chase will take care of her, don't worry."

"Who is Chase?"

"A friend of Cinna's," he said dismissively but Peeta's eyes narrowed at Haymitch's tone. "Anyway, I need to get going. Be careful at the Minister's today. Find out what you can about Darius but be discreet. Whatever you do, don't draw too much attention to yourself. It wouldn't do for Antonius to be suspicious of you when we're so close."

"You didn't tell me Haemon would be here," Peeta said accusingly.

"I didn't know. Honest I didn't Peeta. And are you ever going to tell me what they did to you in 2?"

"No," he said curtly. "Are you ever going to tell me about your Hunger Games?"

"Touche kid. I'll see you later then." Peeta nodded as he opened the door for Haymitch to slip out of. He noticed something glittering on the floor, and stooped to pick it up. It was the mockingjay pin that Katniss had been wearing the night before. He had forgotten it was in his pocket, and it must have fallen out when he had discarded his pants. He pocketed the pin, slipped his room key in next to it, and sighed heavily as he made his way outside to request a car.

"The Minister of Defense's mansion, please," he told the driver unsmilingly. He withdrew the pin from his pocket and fingered the gold, not paying attention to the city racing by.

* * *

 **I know everyone is anxious for *THAT* chapter, but there's obviously more going on in Peeta's mind than we thought. Rest assured, it will happen soon. The sexual tension can be sliced with a knife right now. Thanks for all of the sweet messages this past week! It was a wonderful birthday and I'm grateful to such amazing fans who take the time out of their day to message me! XOXOXOX**


	33. Chapter 33

_**This was a fun chapter to write, because of revelations for both parties :) Hope you enjoy! I did finish writing *THAT* chapter last night and am very happy with how it came out... hope you all have a great week!**_

 _ **XOXO**_

* * *

Katniss felt slightly awkward sitting between two strange men while they chatted happily and sang loudly to whatever song the driver chose. She had never heard such loud, strange music and she had paused before she had climbed into the back seat.

"Hey Remy, change the station, will you," Cinna said cheerfully. The driver leaned forward to press a button and the song changed. Katniss's head spun.

"You ok, Katniss?"

"I've never heard music like this before," she said softly.

"You don't have music in the districts?" The other boy, Chase, Cinna had introduced him as, asked with wide eyes.

"We do but not like this. We play instruments and we sing. And that's only at celebrations. Other kinds of music is forbidden."

"What? That's insane," Chase shook his head, his blue-streaked hair falling into his eyes. "Ok, time for snacks."

"We just got out of the Capitol," Cinna said in exasperation. "You're going to eat our whole picnic!"

"No I won't. Just the cookies that Mom made. Oh my god, they're still warm! Here Katniss, have one." He stuffed a cookie into her hands before she could protest. She tried to imagine the look on Peeta's face if he saw her eating baked goods from anywhere other than Mellark Bakery and she stifled a grin. She took a small bite and closed her eyes.

"Good huh?"

"Your mom bakes?"

"Runs a pastry shop in the center of town. Of course it devastated her when I said I didn't want to be a baker."

"Her husband is a baker," Cinna said, accepting a cookie as well. "Isn't that right, Katniss?"

"His family owns the bakery but he doesn't have much time for it anymore, since he became a Peacekeeper."

"That's a shame. The world needs less fighting and more sweet things."

"They're Peacekeepers, Cinna. They keep the peace," Chase said pointedly.

"Where would you like me to drop you off, Mr. Laurent?"

"The usual spot is fine, Remy. Just up here." Katniss had never heard Cinna's last name before. She wasn't even sure he had one. The car slowed and Chase jumped out. Cinna held out his hand to help Katniss and he shouldered his backpack as he straightened up.

"It's a beautiful day." Katniss agreed, though she wished she had brought a heavier jacket. They were up in the mountains, which meant it would get colder. Cinna saw her shiver and he cleared his throat as the car pulled away.

"Chase, get that jacket out of your backpack, please." Chase knelt to open his pack and withdrew a beige jacket. Cinna handed it to Katniss with a smile.

"It looks light but I lined it with fleece and sewed on pockets so you can keep your hands warm." Katniss pulled it on and gave him a grateful smile.

"He's a genius when it comes to clothes, isn't he," Chase said fondly, reaching over to squeeze Cinna's hand. They didn't let go and Katniss stared at their joined hands. Cinna chuckled when she noticed her staring.

"I wasn't sure if you had figured it out yet, Katniss. I'm gay."

"She couldn't possibly think you're straight," Chase muttered, hugging him from behind.

"Hush," Cinna said, squeezing Chase's hand. "Chase and I have been dating for about a year but his mom refuses to acknowledge that he is gay. Likewise, my grandfather is from the districts and definitely doesn't approve. Most of the time, we have to sneak around. That's why we drive out of town every week." Cinna

stepped away from Chase and toward Katniss.

"If it makes you uncomfortable, just tell us and we will be discreet today. We're not offended." Katniss swallowed thickly. Homosexuality was frowned upon in the districts but not altogether forbidden. Here in the Capitol, it seemed to be more common. She had seen a few same sex couples the day that she and Peeta had explored the city. And she'd seen several Victors of the same sex, kissing at the mansion. But she felt like she knew Cinna now. They had shared secrets, he had made her laugh and most of all, he made her feel comfortable.

And here he was, asking if her if she was comfortable with this when it was his day to be with his boyfriend.

"This wasn't a good idea, Cinna. She's totally freaked."

"No," she stepped forward and shook her head. "No, I'm not. Who am I to judge you and say you're wrong for loving who you love? This is your day together. Please don't let me distract you from each other. You obviously care very much about each other." Chase stepped forward and took Cinna's hand again. Cinna gave her a grateful smile.

"Thank you, Katniss." She nodded and smiled.

"So, where is this waterfall you want to show me?"

* * *

It was a beautiful day and Katniss found herself wishing Peeta had joined them. She wasn't sure what he would have said about Cinna and Chase, but Peeta was more understanding and more patient than anyone else she'd ever met. She couldn't imagine he would have a problem with it. She grinned as Chase snuck a kiss every now and then, when they thought she wasn't looking. The forest was tranquil and the views were incredible. Katniss closed her eyes and allowed the wind to surround her, breathing in the scent of pine.

Chase was apparently a very accomplished photographer, and had brought his camera on the hike. They stopped often so he could take pictures of some kind of plant or tree. Katniss felt like she could melt into the fauna and stay there all day. It wasn't her woods back home but it was beautiful.

Chase took pictures of them in front of the waterfall, then turned the camera around and held it out in front of him to take a picture of the three of them together. Katniss found herself giggling and smiling broadly between the two men.

"So tell us more about your man, Katniss," Chase said teasingly as they stretched out on the picnic blanket, rubbing their full stomachs.

"What do you want to know?"

"How big is he?"

"Oh my god, Chase!" Cinna covered his face. "Sorry Katniss. I can't take him anywhere."

"Sure you can," Chase leaned over and pressed his lips to Cinna's. "You know you love me."

"Try another question," Cinna shook his head.

"OK fine. How is he in bed?" Cinna held out his hands as if to say "I wipe my hands of him".

"Try another question, Chase," Katniss said, leaning back on her hands. Cinna smirked at his boyfriend.

"Tough crowd. Ok. What do you want to be when you grow up?"

"When I grow up?"

"Yeah, I mean, I take it you're finished with school. What do teenagers do in the districts when they're out of school and old enough to live on their own? I studied photography and became an apprentice when I finished school. I'd like to be a photojournalist. What about you?" Cinna watched her with a kind smile while Katniss pondered the question.

"We don't really have many choices in 12," she finally said. "The Seam people, that's where I grew up, mostly become coal miners. The Merchant kids, that's where Peeta grew up, they become apprentices in a shop or eventually shop-owners. Peeta would probably have taken over his family's bakery. I would have worked in the

mines. There's not a lot of options for us."

"That's horrible," Chase said, shaking his head. "One reason I want to become a photojournalist is so that I can travel around to the districts and show the truth. Everyone says 10, 11, 12 are happy with the way things are but I want to show the poverty and the terrible living conditions. I want Panem to see the truth." Huh. Maybe not all Capitol people are the same, she decided.

"I told you, not everyone thinks like the government thinks," Cinna said, reading her thoughts.

"Hell no," Chase wrinkled his nose. "I can't wait to see a different Panem one day."

"You think it will really happen?" Chase glanced at her with a raised brow.

"You don't? I thought you were-"

"Tired of the way things are," Cinna said hastily. Katniss frowned between the boys.

"I am but I also don't see things really changing. We have been slaughtering children for the amusement of the Capitol for 77 years. Don't you think if something were going to change, it would have already?"

"Anything worth fighting for takes time," Chase shrugged. "There was a time when it was it was perfectly acceptable to walk right up to a gay person on the street and beat the shit out of them. I'm not saying things are perfect for us now but people don't kill us for it anymore. That justice was fought for for many many years, long before Panem was even thought of. Times are changing, Katniss, and all of us will have to decide if the risk is worth it."

"I'm not sure I know what you're talking about."

"You will," he assured her. "Eventually. Baby, pass me a biscuit."

"You've had three already," Cinna said but he threw the tin of biscuits into Chase's lap. Chase grinned and winked at him.

"I know you like these love-handles I'm getting." He squeezed his side, which really wasn't much there anyway, Katniss thought. Cinna scooted closer to his boyfriend and their fingers entwined.

"Can I ask you guys a question?" They both nodded.

"You're, what, in your 30's? Why are you hiding who you are? Aren't you independent adults? Why care what other people think?" Cinna and Chase exchanged looks and looked sad for some reason.

"I guess you're right. We don't need anyone's approval...but we would like it."

"My mom just likes to pretend that I will settle down with a nice girl eventually."

"And my grandfather is so old fashioned, he yelled at me how wrong it was and how unnatural it was. After that, I didn't really want to talk to him about it anymore. As much as I want to hold Chase's hand in front of my grandfather, I know he doesn't have a lot of time left. I want his memory of me to be untainted and my memory of him be the same as it always was. He raised me. We lived in the districts together, then we adapted to the Capitol together. I don't want him to see someone different when he looks at me, and have the time we have left together be strained. As selfish as that makes me."

"It doesn't make you selfish," Katniss protested. "It makes you a loving grandson who doesn't want to hurt his grandfather. I think you're both very brave."

"Cinna clued me in to your new nickname," Chase winked at her. "Girl on Fire. After meeting you, I can understand why he gave it to you. You have a fire inside you,

Katniss, and I think you're going to change the world with it."

"I'm just a girl from the poorest part of District 12. What could I do to change things?"

"You'd be surprised. The Victors are quite intrigued with you. I was doing Cecilia's hair this morning and she mentioned how brave you are." Katniss was stunned. How could a Hunger Games Victor call her brave?

"You might just be the spark that the country needs," Chase said softly, his green eyes glowing.

"Ok, with no mention of his...sexual prowess," Cinna shot Chase a warning look, "tell us a little bit about your husband."

"I'm still getting to know him, to be honest," she said slowly. "We knew each other when we were children but we barely spoke. And then before he turned 16, he was kidnapped and taken to 2 to become a Peacekeeper. He only returned to the district a few weeks ago. And we were married. We're still strangers, in many ways."

"Was it an arranged marriage," Cinna asked gently.

"No. Well, not technically." She quietly explained everything. Her sister's illness, her agreement to become a Peacekeeper's wife, her brief but terrible time with Cray, and Peeta's brother and then Peeta himself, coming to her rescue. But then she was telling them more. She told them her fear of becoming a wife, the anxious realization that Peeta had changed, the slowly growing intimacy between the two of them, the night before when Peeta had seemed to withdraw into himself for a moment. She told them of what she had heard Haymitch telling Peeta, what had happened at the President's mansion the past several nights, how she had almost been violated by Finnick Odair. Chase winced.

"Poor Finnick."

"You know him?"

"Not very well. I know his… I know Annie Cresta a little better. I did a project with her when she won her Games. I know how much Finnick loves her."

"He's Snow's slave, isn't he?"

"Most of the Victors are," Cinna nodded sadly. "If you're considered desirable, you're sold. Some manage to escape it. Cecilia acquired a scar in her games. Not terribly evident but enough to keep from being requested. She eventually moved back home and married her childhood sweetheart. They have two children, with one more on the way, I believe. And Porter… he let himself go so badly after the Games that no one requested him. He was too skinny and sickly looking, and he didn't stop with the drugs. Finnick, Johanna, Gloss, and Cashmere are the most requested. The others come to the Capitol during the summer season and are offered up from time to time, but mostly it's those four."

"Disgusting," Chase snapped a twig in his hands. Cinna reached over and squeezed his hand.

"I think Peeta was supposed to be Aurelia Snow's birthday gift," she said, her eyes locked on the blanket. Cinna glanced sideways and sighed.

"I wasn't sure but I heard rumors."

"He didn't tell me, but I was thinking about it all night and put two and two together. How the Victors were acting, talking about a list and how Peeta and I were on it. Snow wanted to see him before dinner, and when he came back, he was as white as a sheet. He was going to give Peeta to her, wasn't he?"

"I don't know for certain, Katniss, but it wouldn't surprise me. See, it's traditional for girls to lose their virginity to a high-ranking official of certain wealth and stature. Higher up's prefer them to do it when they turn 16. Snow wanted to let his granddaughter choose, so that's why he invited all of the Victors to the mansion. Even the ones who have long been out of the program. I'd heard he added you and Peeta and a few more random Peacekeepers to the list. But I don't know what happened. Young Miss Snow was seen with Caspian Underthorn, the winner of this year's Games."

"I wonder what Peeta said to make him change his mind," she replied, trying not to think about the Capitol's sickening traditions.

"I don't know but I'm glad he did." Katniss nodded in agreement.

"It's starting to get late. We should get back so Peeta doesn't worry about you."

"I'm sure he's worrying anyway. I told him I would be fine with you two but he was still upset that I left."

"He's just being protective, Katniss. After all that's happened, who could blame him? I hope you didn't give him too hard a time." She bit her lip. She had been slightly childish, just leaving like that. She knew Peeta didn't want her to go but she hadn't stopped to think why. It wasn't that he was jealous (was he?). She had literally been dragged away from him in a Capitol party the other night and he had been powerless to help her. How would he feel now, waiting for her to return?

"Ugh, I need to apologize to him."

"There's plenty of ways to say you're sorry," Chase said with a wink.

"Chase, really," Cinna huffed. "I'll order the car back here. I'm glad you were able to come with us today."

"Me too. Thank you for inviting me."

"I still want to meet your man though," Chase said firmly.

"One day," she promised him. They waited by the road and Katniss watched as the sun started to set over the mountains. It really was a beautiful sight.

* * *

Peeta nodded to the man who welcomed him inside, and he sat on the comfortable-looking chaise, his leg jiggling nervously. He didn't have to wait long, before Duartyr entered the room.

"Peeta! Good to see you."

"And you, sir." He shook hands with the General and shifted from side to side. "Is Minister Antonius here?"

"He is but he is in a meeting. I wanted to make sure you weren't waiting for too long, though. Let's walk." Peeta followed the General through the mansion, his hands buried in his pockets. It wasn't entirely proper for a Peacekeeper but he was really on edge and being in this mansion wasn't really helping.

"You alright, Peeta?" The General noticed Peeta's behavior.

"Yes sir. My apologies. I'm just distracted."

"You didn't bring your wife, did you?"

"No sir. She went on a hike with some friends. I haven't let her out of my sight for too long this whole trip."

"I understand why," Duartyr said, rubbing his chin. "I'm sure she will be fine. Let's sit in here." He lead Peeta into a study and gestured for him to sit while he poured drinks. Peeta noted how at home Duartyr looked here but then, he reasoned, he was sure the General was here quite often.

"Have you given any thought to what we talked about last night?" Peeta tapped his finger against the glass.

"About what, General?"

"Relocating to another district," Duartyr lowered his voice. Peeta cleared his throat.

"Katniss and I briefly discussed it last night. She is wary of the idea. And 12 has always been home to me, as I told you when I wanted to be stationed there. I'm not certain about it either."

"You wanted to return to 12 so you could be with her," Duartyr said knowingly. "And now you've married her. You can take her and her family to another district. Where it's safer."

"What is going on, General Duartyr? Why is everyone trying to get me out of District 12?" Duartyr looked considering, before he rose to his feet and closed the door to the study.

"This does not leave this room, Captain Mellark. Is that clear?" Surprised, Peeta nodded.

"There have been talks of rebellious activity in and around District 12. Just recently, we intercepted a signal that came from beyond 12. We can't interpret but we're fairly certain it came from outside the border of 12. President Snow feared rebellion and decided Commander Cray was not exercising enough authority. That's when Commander Thread replaced him. The President feels that if the rebellious activity can be contained inside the district, they can extinguish it quickly. By whatever means necessary." Peeta leaped to his feet.

"My family is in 12! And my brother… he just got married! He's a Peacekeeper too, General! And Katniss's family-"

"Peeta, calm down," Duartyr reached out toward him. "He sent Thread to investigate. So far, no reports of illegal activity have been brought forward. Thread is carrying out this investigation extremely quietly. He reported to the President that you seem to be loyal to the Capitol. He wasn't altogether pleased when he first met you, you know. When I encouraged him to use you for the mission."

"I remember," Peeta nodded, remembering how Thread had seemed to inspect him closely as if he were a new shiny weapon, just unwrapped from the box and was deciding if it would work properly or not.

"You impressed me, Peeta. In more ways than one. Not only did you show resilience during your… training with Commander Haemon… you recovered more quickly than I expected you to. And you didn't let it stop you from becoming an excellent soldier. I know why you were so determined to climb the ranks now, but I don't begrudge you for it. You're a good Peacekeeper, Peeta. We need our good Peacekeepers to defend the Capitol's borders. Be closer to 1 and 2. That's why we suggested you relocate."

"General, there's something else. Something you're not telling me. And it has to do with Katniss." Duartyr stiffened and Peeta swallowed.

"General Duartyr, I would give my life to secure her wellbeing. If you know something, please, tell me."

"I don't know much," Duartyr shook his head. "Only that President Snow ordered Thread to investigate your wife." Peeta's eyes widened and it suddenly became impossible to breathe.

"That was before he knew she was your wife," he said hastily. "He was told to keep a close eye on her. When he arrived in 12, he learned of her surname and that she was married to the Lieutenant of 12. He reported back to President Snow immediately and President Snow changed his orders. He wanted to meet her."

"Why?"

"I don't know, Peeta. If I knew, I would tell you. I think the Minister knows but he hasn't told me. I don't believe even Thread knows. Just that your wife is a matter of interest in President Snow's eyes."

"I don't understand," Peeta said desperately. "What could she have done to attract the President's interest? Why is he so keen on her?" He couldn't have known, could he? About her going into the woods? If he found out…

"It's certainly curious but I wouldn't worry too much over it. You said she met him last night?"

"Yes."

"And did he say anything peculiar?"

"Not to my knowledge," he shook his head. "He was gracious enough. He apologized to both of us for what happened with the Senator. He said he hoped Katniss could forget about it. That was basically it."

"Strange," Duartyr shook his head. "A girl from 12 who has done nothing wrong, being asked to present herself to the President of Panem." Peeta shifted in his seat. Should he tell Duartyr that Katniss hunted to feed her family?

No. He was still a Capitol General. He might have liked Peeta but he was still loyal to the President above all.

"But he also asked to speak to me," he said nervously. "When I was still in training. He asked to meet with me when I came to the Capitol."

"I had reported to him how impressed I was with you," Duartyr waved this aside. "You'd achieved top marks and passed all your tests with flying colors. I was impressed that a boy from 12 had come so far. He wanted to see you in person. And I had requested to promote you, so he had to inspect you himself."

"He didn't meet with Ryen."

"Your brother wasn't as dedicated as you were. And after… I mean, I didn't blame him for slipping in his training. I let it go, whereas other commanders would not have been lenient. It was just because I hadn't told President Snow much about him. Only that I had two brothers from 12 who were becoming fine soldiers. I talked you up more than I did with Ryen. The President had no reason to want to meet him." Peeta nodded but he still couldn't shake that terrified feeling away.

"So we still don't know why he wanted to meet Katniss."

"My only guess would be because of her parentage. You said her mother is a healer? Is that like a doctor?"

"Yes sir, we don't have doctors in 12. She is the only Healer we have. But Katniss isn't a Healer, like her mother and her sister are."

"Then perhaps her father?"

"He was a coal miner, who died in an explosion. Many other men and women died that day, and the Capitol presented them with medals. Haemon mentioned it to the Minister, actually. They briefly talked about her father and their surname."

"But he died in an explosion?" When Peeta nodded, Duartyr frowned. "Well, then that wouldn't be it either. I just don't know Peeta but I promise I will keep my ears open."

"But why did you say it would be safer for everyone if we relocated?"

"Again, President Snow's orders. When he found out that she was your wife, he told Thread he wanted her away from 12. Somewhere closer to the Capitol. It's partially why Thread pushed for your promotion."

"Thread pushed for me to be promoted to Captain?"

"Well, with anything above a Lieutenant, it has to be voted on. A few of the Generals in other districts were hesitant because you're from 12 but Thread and I vouched for you. President Snow said that when you were promoted, you could move from 12 and take your wife with you." Peeta rubbed his temples. None of it made any sense! Why would Snow want Katniss out of 12? If he knew about her hunting, he would just have her killed. Surely he knew that Peeta would defend his wife?

"I'll talk to her again when we get home. If she can bring her mother and her sister with her, I'm sure she would be alright with moving."

"Your brother and his new wife may relocate as well. I understand he married the Mayor's daughter?"

"Yes sir."

"She has a certain freedom as well, then. Freedom is limited to those with wealth and power. Ryen can leave 12 with you, if you wish."

"I'll consider it," he promised the General.

"What was it that you wished to discuss with Minister Antonius?"

"My replacement, actually. General Thread said that I needed to choose a Lieutenant. The man I have in mind, however, was attacked and wounded before we left 12. He actually traveled to the Capitol with us but I haven't seen him since we boarded the train. I haven't seen his wife either, and that worries me. She's in a delicate condition and as Lieutenant of 12, I promised to keep them safe."

"I haven't heard anything about this," Duartyr frowned. "Who took responsibility when you arrived to the Capitol?"

"General Thread did, sir. He said he would escort the young lady to the hotel but… she doesn't seem to be checked into the hotel. I would assume she stayed at the hospital with her husband. His tongue was cut out, General. He nearly died from the bloodloss." Duartyr looked furious.

"A Peacekeeper? He should have received the best medical attention the Capitol can offer."

"That's what General Thread said too. I just haven't seen them this entire trip. I hope they're both alright."

"I will talk to the Minister about it," Duartyr assured him. There was a soft knock and Duartyr stood. A servant bowed low, his face mask drooping to the floor.

"Excuse the interruption, sirs, but Minister Antonius has asked me to tell you he is occupied for the rest of the day. He apologizes for the inconvenience and begs your forgiveness. He has rescheduled for both of you to join him for breakfast tomorrow morning."

"I'm afraid I have a prior engagement. I am having breakfast with President Snow tomorrow morning," Peeta said casually. Duartyr looked surprised.

"I am sure the Minister will be in touch to reschedule then. I'm terribly sorry, sirs."

"Thank you," Duartyr nodded to the servant and with another low bow, the man retreated from the room.

"I need to find out about Darius," Peeta sighed. "General, if you have any other connections, please, Darius is a good man and I want to make sure he's being taken

care of."

"I can call the nearest medical facility. It's where Victors and Peacekeepers are taken. Perhaps they will know something."

"Would General Thread tell you anything?" Duartyr's face darkened for just a moment.

"I would rather try to find out from someone else." Peeta nodded in understanding. Thread and Duartyr clearly did not see eye to eye. Even in the Capitol, there were different sides.

"I'm going to return to my room and make some calls. I will contact you later in the evening, Peeta. Why don't you return to your hotel and take your wife out to a nice dinner?"

"If she's back from her hike," he muttered.

"Come on. I'll have my driver take you to your hotel."

They were silent on the way back, Peeta's mind racing. He puzzled at what Duartyr had said about Katniss and failed to come up with an answer that made sense. The ride back to the hotel was a quick one and Peeta thanked the driver and Duartyr for the ride.

"I'll talk to you soon, Captain," Duartyr saluted him as they drove away. Peeta glanced up at the hotel, hoping that Katniss was back. He didn't like fighting with her but she could be so damn stubborn at times. All he wanted to do, though, was kiss her senseless so she couldn't argue with him any longer.


	34. Chapter 34

_**Warning: LOTS of smut up ahead! yes this is the chapter you've been wanting ;) read on!**_

* * *

Peeta knew immediately he was alone when he opened the door. He sighed, tossing the key onto the table and flipping the light on, before he closed the door behind him. He decided to change into something more comfortable, tugging his shirt off as he went into the bedroom. He quickly shed his fancy blue pants and pulled on a worn pair of jeans that he was fond of. He pulled out a plain white shirt and his head jerked up when he heard a soft knock. He pulled the shirt on before opening the door.

Katniss stood in the doorway, one foot hiked up behind the other, her hands folded in front of her. Her eyes drifted up to meet his, almost shyly.

"Hi."

"Hey." He held the door open and allowed her to enter the suite. He didn't miss the way her eyes traveled over him, lingering on his exposed arms and the way the shirt pulled tight around his abs. He walked over to the fridge to grab a glass of water.

"Did you have fun on your hike?"

"I wish you would have been there," she said softly. "It was really beautiful and the views were just incredible! It was so cold but Cinna was nice enough to bring an extra jacket. He says hello, by the way."

"Does he now?" She didn't miss the way his mouth twisted. She hadn't believed before that he could possibly be jealous but she reminded herself that Peeta didn't know about Cinna. As far as he was concerned, she had left the city with two strange men. It didn't look good and she knew she would have thrown a fit if their roles had been reversed.

She stood in front of him and draped her arms around his neck. His brow quirked in surprise as she leaned up to kiss him.

"I'm sorry about this morning," she said against his lips. "I should have realized why you were so upset and should have stayed to talk about it. Instead, I left like a child and probably made things worse." Peeta leaned over to set the glass down, then rested his hands on her hips. She removed one of his hands from her waist and wrapped her fingers around his.

"Want to come sit down with me?" He followed her curiously, sitting beside her on the window ledge. She turned to face him and her knees tapped against his, their hands still entwined.

"There's something you should know about Cinna." Peeta tried to hide his grimace. Why was she talking about another man?

"He has a boyfriend, Peeta." Peeta's brow furrowed even further, convinced he had heard her wrong.

"Wait. What?"

"I met him. He's really nice, and they're both so sweet to each other. It made me miss you even more. It made me realize how lucky I am that I'm able to express my affection toward you, when so many can't. They're not allowed to be who they are, because their families won't accept them. But I can kiss you in front of my sister and not have to worry about it. I can hold your hand in public. If they came to the districts, they would be chased off for that. It's insane." She took his hand and kissed his knuckles.

"But we don't have to hide. Even though you're Merchant and I'm Seam, we don't have to hide it. We might have had problems if you weren't a Peacekeeper, which is, I'm sure, another reason you chose not to say anything when we were young."

"I wouldn't have cared about what anyone else had to say," he said softly, pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear. "All I cared about was being with you. Still do."

"You know it wouldn't have been easy," she protested. "People already stare at us. I can just imagine how much worse it would be if you weren't in a position of power."

"I really couldn't care less how people feel about our relationship," he shrugged. "I hope you know that by now. Especially seeing how my own mother reacted."

"I was so surprised at how you stood up to her like that, for me. No one has ever done that before. Not even Gale. I think it's because he figured I wanted to fight my own battles but I remember, right after we first met, some Merchant guys were teasing me behind the flag pole and calling me names. A crowd gathered to watch and no one said anything. I hid behind the building and cried before I went to walk Prim home. Everyone assumed I was so tough, I guess, and I didn't want to show them it hurt." Peeta's mouth thinned.

"I must have been in class. Because I wouldn't have stood by. In fact," his lips curved upwards and he gave her a sly smile. "My first fight in school was because a guy in my class was talking about you, calling you names. I punched him in the face."

"You did what?" He shrugged and laughed at her incredulous look.

"I won't stand by and listen to lies about you. I knew what they were saying wasn't true and I was going to defend your honor, whether you wanted me to or not. I'm sure you would have hit me for getting involved, had you known."

"Or kissed you for defending my honor," she smiled, leaning up to do exactly that. His eyes fluttered closed as their lips met, his mind racing with images of a fourteen year old Katniss clutching her schoolbooks and whispering thank you in his ear before leaning in to kiss him. One arm wrapped around her waist while his other hand found its way to her hair. He quickly pulled her braid loose so he could wrap his fingers around her dark locks. He gently took her lip between his teeth and tugged lightly, causing her to moan deeply into his mouth. He swallowed her moans eagerly, his growing erection reminding him that there had been too many interruptions already. She unconsciously rubbed against him and he released a deep groan from the back of his throat. When she broke the kiss, he let out a needy little moan that he normally would have slapped himself for. At this point, however, he was desperate for her and didn't care.

She took his face in her hands to make sure he was listening. His eyes shot open and he looked surprised to see her completely serious face only inches from his.

"Peeta, why didn't you tell me about the party?" His brow furrowed in confusion. He seemed incapable of speech at the moment.

"Aurelia Snow's birthday party," she continued. "And her… birthday request." His eyes widened in realization. How had she found out? More importantly, why hadn't he told her? He tried to rack his brain for all they had talked about the night before. No, he definitely had not brought that up.

He swallowed several times before he could find his voice.

"I, uh… I don't know." He groaned and rolled his eyes. Smooth.

"You didn't think I had a right to know?"

"No! It's not that, I mean, I just… I don't know, Katniss, it wasn't something I really wanted to think about. I wanted to forget it and I think that's why I was so...eager when we got back to the room. Because I kept thinking… what if. What if I had been...forced to go through with it. What if my first time had to be with a little girl, who expected me to be this… I don't know, this experienced, strong presence…and not the woman I..." he trailed off, looking uncomfortable. "I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want to see this horrified expression on your face. I didn't want you to know how close… I didn't want to hurt you." She took his face in her hands again.

"We have to start talking to each other," she said softly. "We have to tell each other things. If we don't, it's like we're keeping secrets from each other and I can't stand that from you. I get it from everyone else but not from you. Don't be afraid that something will upset. Talk to me, ok?"

"Ok."

"So, I don't understand. Why did Snow change his mind?" Peeta squeezed his eyes shut, remembering the awkward conversation.

"He discovered that I'm a virgin and decided I wasn't fit for his granddaughter." She wrinkled her nose in disgust and he rubbed the back of his neck.

"It was awkward, believe me. But he said his son informed him of it too late, and he had to tell Aurelia that I wasn't… a suitable choice. She had to choose someone else." He felt a rush of sympathy towards Finnick.

"Finnick and I talked about it afterwards. What he's forced to do."

"I talked to Cinna and Chase about it today too. How Snow enslaves the Victors. It's so wrong, Peeta!"

"All of this is wrong! The Games, the Victors, the Capitol's twisted traditions. All of it. And I felt horrible for what I did to Finnick. I basically forced him into a little girl's bed."

"Finnick? She didn't choose Finnick." Peeta looked bemused.

"What?"

"Cinna said she chose the new Victor, Caspian something or the other. He was seen escorting her from the room." He sighed with relief. He hoped Finnick had been able to return to Annie then. He moved closer and stroked her cheek with the back of his hand.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about the birthday party."

"And I'm sorry I brought up the contract last night." He visibly winced and her hand rested on his cheek. His hand covered hers and he sighed, leaning forward so their foreheads were pressed together.

"I'm sorry about this morning. I acted like an insensitive jerk and I'd like to say I was just being protective but... I was jealous. I shouldn't have behaved like that toward you."

"Peeta, I hope you know how I feel about you by now. I am terrible at this...saying the right thing or doing the right thing. But I want to be with you, for as long as you'll allow me to. I don't need a piece of paper telling me that I belong to you. My heart is yours. Whether for five years… or for longer. It stopped being about a contract, for me anyway, after we toasted. This marriage is real. My feelings for you… they're real."

"Who says you aren't good at saying the right thing," he said, his eyes sparkling. Their lips met in a passionate frenzy, their hands everywhere. His hands buried in her hair while hers dove under his shirt and pushed it up over his head. Her nails raked across his bare back and he tore his lips away from hers to claim her slender throat. She pulled him backwards into the bedroom until he realized they were hovering over the bed.

"And tonight, I want to give you the rest of me," she said so quietly, he had to lean closer. "My body, my thoughts, my soul… they're yours." He surged forward to kiss her, his tongue wrapping around hers. He kissed every part of her mouth, leaving no part untouched.

He followed her down to the bed, his knee between her legs and his hands trapped under her back. She reached out to tenderly run her fingers over his bruised ribs. He bit his lip but allowed her to heal him with her caresses. Needing to touch her soft skin, he lifted her up slightly so he could rid her of her shirt. She tingled all over as he bent his head to kiss the skin where her neck met her shoulders, and the bumps on her skin intensified as his tongue trailed down the path between her breasts. The bra she wore was new and had to have belonged to Madge, because it was a light shade of pink. He trailed his palms over the satin cup and gently pulled one of them down to expose her breast. She shivered as the cold air made her nipple stand at attention, until his warm mouth closed around her entire breast. She grabbed at his hair, holding him still, refusing to let him move away. He pulled the other cup down so he could palm her left breast, his fingers tweaking her nipple gently.

"Peeta," she whined and he exhaled against her skin, feeling himself harden at her breathy moan. He reached under her and found the clasp of her bra, impatiently pulling it down her arms and flinging it aside. He lifted his head for a moment to take her all in. She was still wearing her black pants but he quickly rid her of those as well. Now she lay under him in nothing but a pair of silky panties, her thighs rubbing together to ease the ache. He captured her ankles in his hands and spread her wide, giving her inner thigh teasing kisses until her legs started to shake. He moved to his stomach, pulling her toward the edge of the bed so he could ravage her properly. She leaned up on her shaking elbows, her hair a wild mess from his hands. His eyes locked on hers, he bent to trail his tongue over her sodden underwear, smiling slyly when she cried out and her head dropped backwards. His stomach chose that exact moment to growl loudly, reminding him he hadn't eaten since breakfast. She raised her head, her brow quirked.

"Was that your stomach?"

"Um. Maybe."

"Do you want to stop and-?"

"I absolutely do not want to stop," he said, pressing the tip of his tongue to her center again. She tugged her lip between her teeth and groaned.

"But you're… you need to eat."

"Ok. I'll eat." He pulled her panties to the side and swiped his tongue between her folds.

"GAH! Peeta, that's not… what I meant… oh my god."

"Be quiet and let me enjoy my meal," he muttered, thrusting his tongue inside her. She fell back on her arms and covered her face.

"Fuck I love the way you taste," he growled, spreading her wider and licking his lips like she was the most delicious thing in the world. Katniss buried her face in her hands, muffling her screams while Peeta kept bringing closer to the edge before he would move his lips back to her thighs. She felt ready to pass out, finally resorting to begging him to finish her off.

"Peeta, please!"

"Hmm? Please what?"

"Please! Make me... oh!"

"Make you what, Katniss?" She groaned in frustration. He was tormenting her, and he was loving every second of it.

"I need to… please, Peeta! Please!" She tried to push his head back down to her dripping core but he just laughed gently and pulled away. She fell back on the bed, gritting her teeth.

"Peeta!" He leaned over her, grinning, his chin shiny with her arousal.

"Do you want to cum, Katniss?"

"Yes," she said weakly.

"Say it. I want to hear you say it." She groaned but jumped as she felt his thumb press directly to her clit.

"Say it," he said again, pressing harder. She stifled a scream and jerked her hips.

"I need to cum, Peeta," she whispered. "Please."

"I'm afraid I can't hear you, love," he said with a cocky grin.

"MAKE ME CUM, PEETA! PLEASE! PUT YOUR TONGUE INSIDE ME!" He was fairly certain that Haymitch and anyone else within a fifty mile radius had heard her impassioned plea but at the moment, he really didn't care. He did exactly as she asked and buried his tongue inside her, stiffening it so he could pretend it was his dick that was thrusting so deep. His two fingers sank into her, thrusting in and out as far as they could possibly go, while his tongue flicked rapidly at her clit. One hand buried in his hair while her other gripped the sheets, her fists clenched so tightly they were bound to be sore later on.

"PEETAPEETAPEETAPEETAPEETA-" she trailed off with a wail as he felt her soak his face and fingers. He gently brought her down from her high, finally pulling his fingers out of her and his lips left tender kisses on her stomach.

"You are so beautiful." She had a hard time catching her breath, as her shaking arm covered her eyes. He could tell that had been a big one and she would need a moment to recover.

Peeta stood and shoved his jeans and briefs down his legs, leaning over to dig into his bag. When he found one of Rye's gifts, he tore at the package with his teeth and knelt next to her.

"Katniss." His voice was gentle, hesitant even, and she opened her eyes to find him gazing at her with the most loving smile. His eyes were soft, hazy, beautiful. She noticed him fitting the condom over himself, fumbling slightly, and she tugged him over her so she could kiss him. He rose up on his hands, caging her in his embrace and pushed her sweaty hair from her face.

"If you've changed your mind-"

"I haven't," she stopped him, gripping his bicep. "I want this. I want you."

"Tell me if you need me to stop. I don't want to hurt you."

"It'll be worth it," she assured him, her hand moving to his shoulder. He held himself in his hand as he rubbed himself back and forth against her. She was slick from her orgasm, her muscles relaxed and her face still wearing a dazed look. He slowly pushed forward, pausing every time he felt her clench. He withdrew a little, then continued to push into her. She told herself to take deep breaths, as his lips met every part of her body. He breathed his adoration into her skin with his kisses, slowly marking her as his. She leaned up and latched her lips to the base of his throat. He swallowed, growing even harder as he realized she was sucking on his skin and leaving a mark. She gently tongued the bruise and moved her palm to his cheek. His glassy eyes found hers as he felt himself unable to go any further.

"This is it," she whispered. He nodded, reaching up to cover her hand with his.

"Last chance. If you want to stop-"

"That is the last thing I want. Now make me yours." His arms shook as he struggled to maintain control. She felt amazing around him and he wasn't even completely inside her.

"I'm so thankful it's you," he whispered against her lips as he surged forward, breaking through the final barrier. She hissed in pain and squeezed her eyes shut, blinking back tears. Peeta's heart ached at seeing her hurt and he tenderly wiped her tears with his thumb.

"I'm so sorry. God Katniss, you feel so amazing."

"I wish I could say the same thing but it hurts so much, Peeta." He bit his lip and glanced down at where they were joined.

"Do you want me… um, do I need to pull out?"

"Just stay still. Give me a minute."

"Take all the time you need," he kissed her temple. He clenched his jaw, willing himself to hold on. He was throbbing and he was certain he wouldn't last very long. He had ignored his brother's advice, deciding the amount of time didn't matter. They could do this again and again, when she felt up to it. He just needed to know what it felt like, to be joined with her. And now that he knew, he wasn't sure he would ever be able to tear himself away.

"Maybe if I…." he trailed off, moving his hand down between them. He quickly licked his thumb before bringing it to her clit, rubbing in soft circles. He felt her contract around him and he bit back a moan.

"Is that helping?"

"A little. Try… try moving. Slowly." He withdrew slightly, keeping his movements as slow as he could, before pushing back in again. He repeated the motions several times until he felt her walls relax. His thumb returned to that little nub of pleasure, drawing faster circles now. Her nails dug into his shoulder and she arched her back.

"Does it feel good," he grunted.

"It's...it's different. You… you're… god Peeta, just don't stop!" He was thrusting faster now, his fingers frantically rubbing as he felt himself getting closer and closer.

"I can't… shit, Katniss, you feel too incredible. I don't know how much longer I can… oh my god, this feels unreal." She could tell he was close and knew she wasn't going to get there. It was still too new, too different. But she wanted to see his expression. She wanted to see him lose control above her. He squeezed his eyes shut, his face straining as he struggled to hold on. She smiled as she pushed his damp hair out of his eyes.

"You're mine, Peeta," she whispered before she sucked at his jawline. He released a strangled cry, his thrusts erratic now. The sounds of skin slapping against skin and the two of them being joined over and over filled the air, making her blush.

"Let go," she crooned. "Cum for me." At her words, he cried out her name and managed a few weak thrusts before he collapsed on top of her. She found it difficult to breathe but didn't want to tell him to move; she loved the feeling of their sweaty skin pressed together and the way his heart raced against hers. She reached up and gently stroked his hair, waiting for him to catch his breath.

When he finally found strength to move, his arms and legs shook as he flung himself to her side. He removed the condom, tied the end, and tossed it into the trash bin. He collapsed on his stomach, his groans muffled by the blanket.

"Holy shit," he said as he sat up, his face flushed. She smiled and draped an arm behind her head.

"Feeling alright there, Mellark?"

"Well Mrs. Mellark, since you have rendered me incapable of speech or movement, I'd say I'm pretty damn content." He fell face first into the blanket before shooting right back up.

"Oh my god Katniss! You didn't finish!"

"It's ok, Peeta-"

"No it's not," he struggled to his hands and knees. "That means it wasn't good for you! Let me-"

"Peeta," she took his hand and pulled it to her lips. "It was great. I mean...well, it really wasn't. It was painful and awkward and a little messy… but that's how it's supposed to go. It was great because it was with you. I can't imagine… I would never want this with anyone else. I let myself be vulnerable and gave you everything I had. I took everything you gave me. I'm yours and you're mine. Anything else is unthinkable at this point." He propped himself on his elbow and stroked her cheek.

"I love you so much. You don't have to say it," he added, seeing her wariness. "I know how you feel. But I just have to say it. You've just given me something that I… I never imagined… you're incredible, Katniss. I hope the next time we do that I can make you feel as amazing as you just did for me. Because that was unlike anything I have ever experienced." It was true. Nothing she had ever done for him nor anything he had ever done for himself came close to actually being inside her. She was exquisite, in every way. She moved closer, burying her face in his chest and falling asleep instantly. His hand made soothing patterns on her back as his mind replayed what had just happened.

He had just made love to Katniss. Even more amazing, she had told him everything was real. He almost wanted to tear the contract up when he returned to 12. It was real for him too. He wanted to burn the piece of paper that said they were bound together for only five years. As far as he was concerned, they were bound for eternity now.

His exhaustion took over and he melted against the warmth in his arms.

* * *

When she woke up, she heard him whispering in the next room. She glanced to her side and grabbed the first thing she saw- one of his formal shirts. She buttoned two buttons and left the rest, before gathering her hair and piling it on top of her head. She padded into the living room and saw him closing the door, pulling a tray of food further into the room. She grinned when she saw he was only wearing a pair of soft flannel pants and blushed when she saw red marks all over his back and shoulders. Perhaps she had gotten a little carried away…

"Hey," his deep voice jerked her away from her thoughts. He grinned as he leaned against the food tray. "I ordered us some dinner. I thought you might have worked up an appetite."

"It was your stomach I heard growling the whole time," she shrugged as she crossed the room to inspect the tray. His eyes traveled up and down her frame and darkened instantly.

"You look perfect in my clothes."

"You look pretty good with no clothes."

"Oh, so you're planning to steal all of my clothes?"

"I might. Turn around." His brow quirked but he turned in a slow circle and held out his hands in question.

"I should put something on your back. I'm sure it stings."

"What are you talking about?" She pulled him to the mirror and turned him around so he could see what she had done to him. His eyes widened.

"Wow. Got a little carried away, did you?"

"You didn't say anything!"

"Katniss, I honestly don't feel it. And I'll gladly wear your marks. I'll trade them for any scars I've had, if it means getting to do that with you again." He wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her close, his other hand resting on her cheek. He stared at her lips for a moment before moving forward, fitting his mouth over hers.

"Ok, you need to wear my shirts more often. They suit you."

"You said that about the flames."

"Changed my mind. This is much better." She smiled and shook her head before leaning in to kiss him again. His hands reached down to grip her bare ass and she squealed against his lips.

"You need to eat," she told him in a stern voice. He held up his hands in surrender and when he turned, she inspected his side.

"That bruise doesn't look great."

"I've had much worse than this, love, trust me. I feel fine. How are you feeling?"

"A little sore but… really good." She couldn't hide her smile from him.

"Yeah?" She nodded and his smile grew as he pulled her over toward the food.

"Hungry?" They loaded up their plates and went to sit on the window ledge, where Katniss could look out over the city. Peeta leaned against the wall, watching her out of the corner of his eye. He already wanted her again. How long would it take for her to recover? Cut it out, Mellark, she's sore and you need to give her time. He silently told his dick to behave and focused his thoughts elsewhere. Well, tried to.

Like an idiot, he had ordered her strawberries and the way she was sucking on the fruit was making it impossible for his dick to behave.

He cleared his throat and locked his eyes on his plate. He studied the fig in his hand and nearly groaned as he realized what it reminded him of. He bit into it, pushing away the memory of how sweet she tasted and how soft and warm she felt around him.

Damn it, he tossed the fruit aside and picked up a piece of cheese instead.

"You have to try this," she said, oblivious to his discomfort. Before he could say anything, she stuck her finger into the bowl she was holding then held it to his lips. He took her finger into his mouth, his taste buds exploding from the sweet and tangy fruit concoction. He detected honey and maybe nutmeg. As a baker, he had experimented with all kinds of sweets and spices. Her smile quivered as he sucked on her finger, her silver eyes now a smoky shade of lust. He swirled his tongue around her digit, the way he did when he was lavishing her nipples, and released it with a pop.

"Delicious," he said in a low voice. She swallowed and returned to her fruit.

"So, um… did you find anything out about Darius and Rosalie?"

"Not yet," he sighed. "Duartyr said he would make some calls, and that he would contact me tonight. It's not too late so he might still call. I just… I have a bad feeling now. And I can't help but feel guilty."

"Why would you feel guilty?"

"I'm his commanding officer, Katniss. It's my job to protect the citizens of 12. Darius and Rosalie are under my protection and yet I let them out of my sight!"

"Peeta… did you even see them when we boarded the train?" He swallowed his food and frowned.

"What do you mean?"

"You said the Peacekeepers helped them onto the train before we even boarded. And when you asked about them, Thread said they were asleep. You never even saw them before we left 12."

"What are you getting at, Katniss?"

"I don't know, something feels… off. Who told you they were loaded onto the train?"

"Burns and Pickens were assigned to help Darius, while Purnia escorted Rosalie. I trust my soldiers."

"Ok. But then Thread was there when we boarded and we never saw either Darius or Rosalie. You don't think Thread did something to them before we left 12?" Peeta's brow furrowed even further. His eyes flashed angrily and his fists clenched. Katniss hated to see that look on his face. She reached for his hand and gently massaged his fist open.

"I didn't mean to upset you. I'm just saying, something might have kept them from making it to the Capitol. You don't think they could still be in 12?"

"I suppose it's possible," he said slowly. "But I think it's more likely if Thread were going to take action against Darius, he would do it here in the Capitol where he has Capitol soldiers to assist him. Oh god, I hope they're alright." His mind raced with horrendous images of what they could be doing to both of them. Rosalie was pregnant. Surely the Capitol would spare a pregnant woman.

"If I don't hear from Duartyr tonight, I will ask Snow about it personally at breakfast."

"Wait what?" Peeta's eyes widened and he groaned.

"I forgot you had left already. Haymitch came to tell us that we are invited to dine with the President and the Victors tomorrow morning."

"Invited. You mean we are being forced to go."

"It would be in our best interests not to decline," he said delicately. She sighed and leaned against the wall.

"And then we can go home?"

"Haymitch arranged passage home the day after tomorrow. We will be back in 12 soon enough, love."

"For how long though? Snow might make us leave 12."

"It might not be so terrible," he said gently, setting his plate down and scooting closer to her. "Prim and your mother can come with us and I can ensure Prim has an education. She could even study to be a Doctor. This might be a great thing for us, Katniss."

"I just don't understand why they want us to leave so badly."

"I wish I knew. I talked to General Duartyr about it today." He quietly told her what the General had told him about Snow's orders. Katniss turned pale and set her plate down.

"Do you think he knows? About me going into the woods?"

"I don't think so. If he did, he would probably just have you arrested. No, there's something else going on. Duartyr says he thinks it has something to do with your parentage."

"My parents? My dad died when I was little."

"I know. So he doesn't think that's it. And I don't think it's your mother," he shook his head and rubbed his temples. "I don't know, Katniss. And it's driving me insane because I just want to keep you safe. All of you. If the President wants you away from 12, there has to be a good reason for it."

"Does there? Because all I can keep coming up with is that he wants me away from 12 is because he views me as a threat. And that's ridiculous because, well, look at me!" He gave her a weak smile and stroked her cheek.

"Don't underestimate yourself. What was it Cinna called you? The girl on fire. Maybe that scares Snow."

"Cinna and Chase said I have a fire inside me that could be the spark that's needed. Whatever that means." Peeta swallowed, looking anxious.

"You weren't around any… enclosed spaces, were you? Anywhere that could have been bugged?"

"No, we were outside, Peeta. Why? You think Snow is having me followed?"

"I have no idea. I'm just not taking any chances. After breakfast tomorrow, I'll escort you wherever you'd like to go. I just ask that you allow me to stay with you. I can't bear the thought of letting you out of my sight right now." He squeezed her hand and in spite of herself, she couldn't help but to smile.

"Just so you know, I'm usually very against someone being so protective of me."

"Just so you know, you are the only one I have ever felt this protective towards." She reached up and gently touched his face, her fingers running over the spots that once bore painful bruises. Bruises that had been inflicted for being protective towards her. No matter what happened, she could never forget the sight of his blackened face, his blue eyes watching her through swollen lids, as she picked a dandelion in the school yard. She moved her hand to the back of his head and pulled him down to her, her lips closing over his. He slipped his hand around to her back and pulled her into his lap. With only his thin pants between them, she felt him hard right against her core. She rose up and sank back down, rotating her hips in a way that made them both groan. She wrapped her fingers in his hair and deepened their kiss.

"I'll never be able to find the words to say thank you, Peeta," she whispered against his throat, her tongue trailing up along his jawline. He groaned but his hands gripped her hips, stilling her immediately.

"Please don't do this as a thank you," he said seriously, his gaze locking hers. "Don't do it because you think you owe me something. Don't initiate intimacy with me because it's what I want. I need it to be what you want. If it's not… it doesn't mean anything."

"I thought I already explained that I want you." He sighed and leaned forward, so their foreheads were pressed together.

"You did. But then you apologize or you thank me, and I'm back to thinking that you're only doing it to appease me. You said earlier that this is real to you, Katniss. Was that the truth, or was it spur of the moment?"

"What? Of course it was the truth," she scowled.

"How am I supposed to know for certain when we are just learning to open up to each other," he said gently. "You said we need to start talking to each other. No more keeping secrets from each other. I agree completely so I am just trying to get the whole truth from you. That was real, Katniss? How you feel about me? That you actually do want this...and you're not just doing it because… you're being forced to?"

"No one can force me to do anything," she said quietly. He gulped and bit his lip when he saw how her eyes had hardened. "I choose my own path. I chose to enter a marriage contract, to save my sister's life. When you saved me, you offered me an out. I could have walked away and I know you would continue to care for me and for my family. That's just the kind of person you are. But I stayed, not out of duty or because I felt obligated to, but because I WANTED to. Despite what I told myself… and others. I didn't have to marry you because the contract doesn't demand it but I chose to toast with you. Because I wanted to. And I certainly did not have to give you my virginity tonight. But I wanted to. I wanted you. So will you stop asking me if it's real? Even if I can't say the words… you know what's in my heart." She moved his hand to her chest, pressing his palm over her heart. His own heart started to hammer, recognizing the faster than normal rhythm, so close to his own patter. If he listened hard enough, he could even hear it. *thump thump thump. I love you. Thump thump thump*

His eyes drifted back to hers and she caught her reflection in the tossing oceans of blue. She leaned forward and used her thumb to wipe a tear from the corner of his eye before she pressed her lips to his forehead.

"Do you feel that?" She asked softly, and he nodded, inhaling shakily. "Good. Real, Peeta." He tilted his face, his hand moving to cup her chin, and captured her lips in a searing kiss. She was sore from earlier, but she wanted him again. She needed to have him inside her. She needed to feel that incredible feeling of being joined together, like they were made for one another. It had hurt at first, a lot actually, but after awhile, she had started to appreciate how he fit so well against her. How her hips had cradled his and he had been so careful with her, holding her as if she were made of glass. He was big, and she was such a tiny thing but it didn't stop her from taking him completely inside of her, thus binding them together.

She tilted her pelvis forward and released a breathy moan. He squeezed his eyes shut at the sound of it and unconsciously thrust his hips forward. She gripped his shoulders and rose up, before lowering down again. He wrapped his arms around her and stood, leaning up to kiss her as he carried her to the bedroom. The bed was a mess, with the blankets strewn all over the place and the evidence of what they had done earlier, like a flashing sign. The room still smelled of sex, another reminder that they were no longer untouched youths from a poor district. In this room, they both felt richer than a Capitolite.

Peeta spun around and lowered to the bed, keeping her legs locked around his waist. His hand moved from her back to grip her ass, squeezing so hard he knew there would be a mark. She squealed into his mouth, her nails raking across his back. He could feel the sting now and he hissed, though he didn't ask her to stop. She could mark him however much she wanted. He would wear them proudly. His hands moved to the buttons of his shirt that hung off her small frame, and he very nearly ripped them off. When the shirt fell open, he lowered his mouth to her breast, sucking hard while his other palm cradled her sensitive flesh. Her hand gripped his hair tightly, her head tilted as she leaned backwards, presenting her chest to him like a special gift. It was a gift he would gladly accept and cherish. He moved his lips from one breast to another, feasting on her flesh, his eyes watching her closely. He moved his hand down to cup her and he groaned into her skin.

"You're so wet for me." She whimpered at his filthy words, feeling herself just getting wetter. He flopped onto his back and gripped her hips, pulling her up to his head. She cast him a confused glance, until she saw where he was heading.

"Peeta-"

"You look like a fucking goddess right now, Katniss," he growled, gripping her thighs. "Come up here. I need my tongue so deep inside you."

"But what do I…?"

"Just ride my face, love," he said huskily, tugging her hips toward him. "Do whatever feels good to you." She was about to speak, to protest perhaps, but his tongue on her made her forget all words and her hands went straight to his hair. He groaned as she tugged sharply and the vibrations made her scream, making her pull his curls even harder. One of his hands drifted from her hips to his own arousal, gripping himself through his pants. As she started to move her hips over his mouth, he felt himself grow even harder and his hand dove into his underwear and pulled himself free. He kept his strokes lazy and teasing, determined not to let this end too quickly. Katniss quickly found a rhythm that was just enough to keep her on the edge, and Peeta's sturdy hands helped guide her movements.

"Peeta!" He hummed against her clit, causing her to scream and smack her palm against the wall. He thrust two fingers inside her just as her fleshy walls started to spasm, and he groaned at the intense feeling. He gently trailed his tongue back and forth until she stopped shaking, her hand releasing its death grip on his hair. He tugged her down to the bed, leaning over her quivering frame to kiss her deeply. She shuddered as she felt his tongue explore her mouth exactly as it had just explored other parts of her. Some side of her told she should be revulsed but she found that she loved it, that Peeta could draw out such a different side of her. She felt his hardened length against her thigh and noticed his pants were slung low on his hips. She moved to her knees and tugged his pants and underwear down to his ankles. She teased him with nips and kisses, grinning to herself as he started to writhe underneath her. She moved up to kiss him and he gasped as she tugged at his bottom lip with her teeth.

"Where are the condoms," she whispered, her eyes glittering.

"My bag," he croaked, his eyes widening as she moved up his body to reach across the bed for his bag. Her breasts were just inches from his face so he sat up and took one into his mouth, making her jump.

"You're distracting me," she complained, rummaging through his bag.

"I'm teaching you to stay focused," he said with a cocky grin.

"Gah! You try staying focused when someone's tongue is...Peeta! Stop distracting me!"

"Alright, fine," he chuckled, holding her hips so she could stay balanced and focused her attention on the bag. She let out a triumphant cry as she withdrew a condom and waved it in the air. Peeta grinned under her, but his smile faded rather quickly.

"Are you sure? We don't have to-"

"Peeta! I thought I told you to cut that out!"

"That's not what I… I just meant, are you sore? I want you to enjoy it and you're not going to if it still hurts."

"I'm fine," she said impatiently, moving to his side. He sat up on his elbows and nearly swallowed his tongue as she took him into her mouth.

"Oh fuck Katniss, you can't do that if-"

"Just making sure you're still ready," she said with a sassy grin. His eyes narrowed and he leaned up to kiss her.

"Looks like I've created a monster," he muttered. She smiled and tore the package open, studying the condom closely. Peeta watched her, her calculating stare making him smile.

"Do you want me to-?"

"I've got it," she said quickly, yanking the condom out of his reach. He nodded and settled back against the headboard. She bit her lip but managed to pull the condom on with little difficulty.

"How's that feel?"

"It's fine. Come here." He tugged her forward as she straddled his lap. Her legs wrapped around his waist and she held him in her hand, uncertain how to proceed. Peeta licked his fingers and brought them to her clit, rubbing softly. His hand covered hers and he rubbed his head against her dripping folds, making sure the condom was well lubricated before he gently started to pull her down on top of him. He watched her face closely, biting his lip when he saw her wince.

"Just start slow," she told him, wrapping her arms around his neck and sinking down. Their eyes slammed shut as her warmth enveloped him and he wished more than anything he could feel her without the condom. He could imagine how much more amazing she would feel.

His trembling hands rested on her hips and he squeezed when he felt her move.

"Tell me what to do, Katniss," he moaned. "I'm hurting you, aren't I?"

"It doesn't really hurt… it just feels… different."

"How do I make it good for you? Tell me."

"Touch me." He licked his fingers again, finding her clit with ease and rubbing in small circles the way he knew she liked. She squeezed his shoulders and moved up and down, every now and again stopping to grind against him. While his hand increased in pace, his other moved up to her hair and he pulled her in for a rough kiss.

"I want us to cum together," his voice was deep and husky. "Katniss, you feel so incredible. So wet and tight and fuck, this must be paradise." Katniss started to bounce faster, feeling her climax approaching.

"Keep… keep doing that," she panted, wrapping her arm around his neck. He lowered his head to take her breast into his mouth while his fingers moved faster between her thighs. All of the sensations combined made Katniss see stars, and she threw her head back with a shrill cry as he felt her clamp down around him.

"Shitsitshitshitshitshit," Peeta chanted into her shoulder as he felt himself empty into the condom, her tight walls milking him completely. When they were both spent, he wrapped his arms around her and held her to his chest for a moment, neither of them moving. Peeta had to admit the sex was incredible but this… this was what he had dreamed about all his life. It wasn't necessarily the physical act itself, but the way she clung to him afterward, their skin sticking together and her damp cheek pressed to his sweaty hair. His fingertips made gentle patterns down her spine as he pressed soft kisses to her shoulder.

"I can't move," she whined. He kissed her temple and gently lifted her off of him. She immediately felt empty and hollow without him filling her. He disposed of the condom before settling down beside her. He spread out on his back, his head resting on her breast and his eyes fluttered shut as he felt her fingers stroking his curls.

That was how they fell asleep, naked and free with broad smiles on their flushed faces.

* * *

 _ **I know quite a few people have been waiting impatiently for this chapter ;) hope you enjoyed! And don't worry, we will finally hear something about Darius in the next chapter.**_

 _ **Have a great weekend! XOXO**_


	35. Chapter 35

Peeta was the first to wake, which was good, because he woke up harder than he usually did in the mornings. Once his eyes had opened and he registered his surroundings, he understood why.

Katniss slept on her back with her arms tucked under the pillow, while Peeta's cheek rested against her stomach. His hand was curved around her breast and his lips were touching her belly button. The blankets were pulled up to his hips while she had nothing covering her, except for him.

He lifted his head, blinking the sleep out of his eyes, and stared at his wife for a good five minutes, not wanting to wake her but longing to know what her husky morning voice sounded like when it was crying for more.

He trailed tender kisses across her hipbone and then lower, already craving her unique taste. He pushed her legs open, chewing on his lip when he saw how pink and perfect she was. He glanced up at her face but she still slept soundly, a content smile making her even more beautiful in the morning light. Peeta lowered his head and trailed his lips down her inner thighs and around her lower lips. Her leg shook and he heard her moan but she didn't stir. He used his fingers to spread her wider and he shivered with delight when he felt her arousal start to leak out of her. He eagerly lapped at her, his tongue flicking across her clit and making her body quiver.

"Oh my god," she mumbled, her voice thick and croaky. Peeta propped his chin on her pelvis and grinned.

"Good morning."

"Mmmornin-ohhhhhhhhhh," she arched her back and brought her hands to her hair as he went back to his task. His dick was positively screaming for attention, so he reached down and wrapped his hand around his shaft. Getting himself off while he was getting her off was a new thrill, and he could barely hold on before he felt wet all over his hand. A few seconds after he had stroked himself to completion, she was arching her back and clutching his hair tightly, his name echoing off the pristine walls. She shuddered and gently pushed him away, and he propped himself on his elbows, leaning down to kiss her.

"That's an interesting way to wake up in the morning," she mumbled, lifting her head off the pillow.

"I couldn't resist. It is getting late though, what do you say we take a quick shower and get ready for breakfast?"

"No funny business," she waggled her finger at him and he smiled as he took hold of her finger and nipped at the tip.

"I can't make any promises." She narrowed her eyes at him and pushed on his shoulder until she sat up and threw her legs over the bed. Peeta watched her unabashedly as she padded flat-footed and gloriously naked into the bathroom. She glared at him over her shoulder and swung her hip out.

"Are you coming or are you just going to stare at me all day?"

"Do I actually get to choose one of those options?"

"No," she snapped. "Get in here. We can't be late for breakfast."

* * *

Peeta kept his hands to himself during their shower, though he did have to turn away and face the wall when the sight of the water dripping down her naked skin became too much. Katniss snorted and shook her head as she washed her hair and he glared at the wall in front of him, silently telling his dick to behave (they had been having that conversation a lot, lately)

Katniss raised her arms to the shower and shook the water out of her eyes. She felt slightly sad as she swiped the cloth between her legs, erasing any evidence of what she and Peeta had done. She washed his sweat off her skin and his scent disappeared down the drain.

"Switch places with me," he grunted behind her, his eyes closed to keep the soap from dripping into his eyes. She watched his muscles flex as he lifted his arm to wash his neck, then trailed the cloth down his chiseled abs. She bit her lip as his hand brushed against his length. She hadn't really paid any attention to that part of him except when they were being intimate but even here in the shower, when he was only half hard, she was still fascinated. She wanted to take him into her mouth and watch him harden in front of her but she had been the one to say no funny business. She quickly stepped to the side so he could rinse the soap off and she couldn't resist squeezing his firm ass as she did so. He quirked his brow and grunted as he raised his face toward the water.

"That doesn't count as funny business?" She shrugged but didn't answer. He turned the water off and they dried off quickly, standing close together on the drying matts. She stood in front of the mirror and brushed out her hair, while he brushed his teeth. She studied her reflection and tried to find something that would give her away. Would anyone know what they had done? Would the President see something in her face that said they were no longer virgins? What if one of the Victors saw something? She internally groaned at the thought of Johanna's smug face. She was sure the Victor from 7 would have nothing but crude things to throw out.

Did she look any different? Did Peeta?

She studied his face, searching for something. He looked flushed but it could have been the hot water on his fair skin. He was smiling, but that wasn't rare. His hair was combed back perfectly. Katniss longed to run her fingers through it and mess it up again. She rolled her eyes. What was wrong with her? The towel tied around his waist seemed to tease her, begging her to rip it off.

He caught her staring and his smile grew. She blushed as she tried to sidestep him but he cupped her chin and leaned down to kiss her. He hoped this would continue when they returned to 12. He wasn't sure how she would feel being so affectionate in front of her family. He smirked to himself at the thought of her kissing him in front of Gale Hawthorne. Oh, if only.

He heard the phone ring and he cleared his throat as he rushed to answer it. He glanced at the clock to make sure they weren't running late before he picked up the phone.

"Mellark."

"Captain Mellark. General Duartyr. I need you to meet me at the Justice Building in the town square. As soon as possible."

"General, my wife and I are having breakfast with the President and some of the Victors this morning," he whispered, his heart starting to pound at his General's tone. "Is everything alright?"

"No Peeta. It's not. I think I found Darius."

* * *

Peeta was at loss what to do. He didn't want to send Katniss to breakfast with Snow alone. He certainly didn't want to take her with him to the Justice Building. He couldn't ask anyone to stay with her.

Katniss watched while her husband rushed around the room, dressing as quickly as he could.

"Are you going to tell me what's going on? Why you look so pale?"

"Sorry Katniss, I just… Duartyr asked for me to meet him at the Justice Building and I don't know how I'm supposed to go when we're supposed to be at the Presidential Mansion soon."

"Tell Duartyr you can't meet him," she shrugged. He didn't want to mention Darius just yet. He had no idea what state his soldier would be in, and Duartyr had only said to come quickly. Why was Darius at the Justice Building and not the medical facility? How had Duartyr found him? A million questions raced through Peeta's mind but he shook his head.

"I can't disobey a direct order from my General."

"And you really can't disobey an order from the President," she said pointedly. He sighed, admitting she was right. What was he supposed to do?

A knock at the door saved him from having to say anything further and he yanked it open, almost sighing in relief at the sight of Haymitch.

"Good morning Captain. Mrs. Mellark," Haymitch nodded to Katniss. "Would you like to share a ride to the Presidential Mansion?"

"Haymitch," Peeta lowered his voice and pulled the Victor into their room. "I need you to escort Katniss to breakfast for me."

"What?"

"What," Katniss demanded behind him. Peeta bit his lip and turned, holding his hands up in a placating manner.

"Duartyr thinks he's found Darius," he said quietly. "He told me to meet him at the Justice Building. Now."

"Peeta, you can't just skip out on breakfast with the President," Haymitch reminded him.

"Katniss can go in my place. If I don't go, something might happen to Darius."

"And if you go, something might happen to someone you love!" Katniss gasped at Haymitch's angry outburst and Peeta stared with wide eyes. Haymitch sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

"Kid, it might be a trap."

"I trust General Duartyr. Probably more than anyone else in the Capitol. Besides Katniss, of course."

"Thanks. I feel the love," he grumbled. Peeta rolled his eyes.

"Look Haymitch-"

"No, you look. You want to keep that pretty wife of yours safe? You do everything that Snow says. He says come to breakfast, you come to breakfast! Do not tempt him by disobeying him. What makes you think I'd be able to keep her safe from him?"

"You're a Victor," he said weakly.

"A Victor is selfish, kid. A Victor survives above all else. That means he has to kill everyone to make sure he is the one who gets out of there. You can't protect anyone in an arena."

"Haymitch, please," Peeta pleaded. "I have a duty to citizens of 12-"

"You have a duty to your wife," Haymitch practically yelled. "You have a duty to her to protect her and stay by her side! You have a duty to Violet Everdeen to keep her daughter safe! You have a duty to Primrose Everdeen to bring her sister home! You have a goddamn duty to Ash Everdeen to cherish his daughter, as he did, and make sure he didn't die in vain!" Katniss's hands clapped to her mouth as Peeta's hung wide open. Haymitch's eyes were bulging, realizing what he had just said.

"Explain yourself," Katniss said, her voice shaking. She lowered her hands to her side and clenched them tightly. "What did you mean just now?"

"Nothing sweetheart-"

"Don't you sweetheart me," she said shrilly. "What did you just say about my dad?" Haymitch glanced at Peeta and shook his head.

"We need to go. President Snow is expecting-"

"Not until you tell me," Katniss shrieked, angry tears streaming down her cheeks. Peeta moved to wrap his arms around her but she jerked out of his reach.

"Don't touch me, Peeta. Haymitch, you need to start talking. Right now."

"You know, don't you," Peeta said softly, his eyes on the Victor. "You know why Snow wants Katniss out of 12 so badly. Why he told Thread to investigate her. You know and you didn't tell me."

"Don't be naive, Captain," Haymitch sneered. "If I'd told you everything and you were taken prisoner by the Capitol, you really think our secrets would be safe?" Peeta looked furious.

"I would never-"

"Not willingly, you wouldn't but there are other ways to make you talk." Haymitch held up his hand, then dropped it by his side. "I know what they did to you, Peeta. What they could do to you again. I know what is inside you. And I couldn't risk it. I couldn't risk the Capitol turning on you and finding out." Peeta's eyes flashed as his hands started to shake.

"How did you-"

"That doesn't matter," he waved his hand. "The point is, we're in danger here. More so than back in 12. Although there can be an… accident… anywhere, any time." He gave Peeta a pointed look but Peeta's ears were buzzing and he felt an intense pain in his head. He crushed his nails to his palms and squeezed his eyes shut.

"Sweetheart, go take his hand."

"Don't tell me what-"

"Katniss, stop being a stubborn mule and take hold of your husband's hand! Now!" Katniss huffed but grabbed Peeta's hand and gently massaged it open. His palm was bleeding and she watched him anxiously.

"Peeta? Can you hear me?" He wanted to answer her but the pain was becoming unbearable. He reached up and pressed his hand to his temple. She held onto the other hand, rubbing his fingers between her palms.

"Peeta, I'm right here," her voice was soothing and all he wanted to do was fall into her arms. "You're ok. I'm right beside you."

"Take a step back, sweetheart," Haymitch warned but Katniss ignored him. She moved closer, wrapping her arm around Peeta's waist.

"Peeta, open your eyes and see me. I'm right here." His hand shook in hers and he squeezed his eyes shut even tighter. Voices buzzed in his ears. He started to hit himself in the head and she gave Haymitch a look of terror.

"Back off, Katniss," the Victor said through gritted teeth.

"And leave him like this?" Peeta fell into the floor, rocking back and forth on his knees and she knelt beside him. She took his face in her hands and kissed his forehead. She started to hum, very softly, but Haymitch knew the song well. He had heard Ash sing it often enough. It always made baby Katniss smile. He saw how the song affected Peeta as well. He stopped shaking and he was no longer hitting himself. Katniss wrapped her arms around him and buried her face in his shoulder, humming the song. Peeta's head fell back against her chest and Haymitch watched as the Captain returned to himself. He was stunned at how weak Peeta looked. From what he'd been told, the young peacekeeper would react violently and wouldn't let anyone touch him. It seemed that his sources weren't completely right.

Peeta's head hung and he felt his body ache all over. Katniss supported him as she pulled him to his feet and helped him lean against her.

"What was that," she asked Haymitch sharply.

"Proof of what I just said. Peeta has been poisoned and he isn't as cured as we had hoped he was. He can be triggered, and can lose sense of himself."

"What does that even mean," she snapped. "He didn't lose… whatever you just said."

"Did that look like Peeta to you? At least he didn't turn violent."

"Violent? He looked like a scared little boy! How could you think he would turn violent?"

"Look sweetheart, Haemon was determined to turn him into a weapon," Haymitch explained softly. "He wanted Peeta to forget about his past and where he had come from. He wanted him to be a trained killer. But you and I both know that Peeta was always a sweet, mild-mannered boy, who wouldn't hurt a fly. Even in his wrestling matches, he shook his opponent's hand and gave them a smile. Haemon wanted to erase that part of him completely so they poisoned him and made him forget who he was. They made him think he was a bloodthirsty soldier, highly trained in combat."

"How could they possibly do that? Erase a whole other side of him," she asked, shaking her head.

"It's called hijacking, Katniss," his voice was surprisingly gentle. "And I'm sorry that I can't give you more information. The Capitol's very secretive about this form of torture, and I've been told that the results are inconsistent. What I do know is that it's a type of fear conditioning. Have you ever been stung by a tracker jacker?"

"Dad always told me to stay away from the west end of the woods, because there were nests there. But I've never seen any."

"Ash would know about that," Haymitch nodded. "He was stung when he was a boy." Her eyes widened in horror. Why had her father never told her that?

"Well anyway, you really suffer mental confusion. A sense of being unable to judge what's true and what's false. That's what they did to Peeta. They administered various dosages of venom and tortured him. They… beat him or shocked him. I'm sure you can use your imagination."

"I just don't understand… how do they alter a memory?"

"Jesus sweetheart, I'm not from District 3 or anything. OK. This is how it was explained to me. Imagine that I ask you to remember something - either with a verbal suggestion or by making you watch a tape of the event - and while that experience is refreshed, I give you a dose of tracker jacker venom. Not enough to induce a three-day blackout. Just enough to infuse the memory with fear and doubt. And that's what your brain puts in long-term storage." Katniss shook her head in

bewilderment.

"But it didn't work, did it? I mean… he's still here. He's… he's still Peeta," she glanced at her husband and bit her lip at how pale he was. He was leaning on her for support and his eyes were half closed.

"The thing is, this type of conditioning is usually targeted toward particular memories or one particular person. It's strange that they were trying to wipe out his whole background. And you're right, it didn't work like they hoped. From what I've been told, this method was frowned upon and Haemon went behind Snow's back to do it to Peeta. When another commander from 2 found out what was happening, he reported Haemon to Snow and whisked Peeta away from there. He was given some time to recover and Peeta's commander reached out to Ryen Mellark to see if there was anyone else who could help him. Well Rye had been through some terrible ordeal himself, I don't really know all the details, but he said Peeta should be able to return to 12 for a short time. I think we both know what he hoped would jog the boy's memories." Katniss blushed and turned to Peeta.

"But the Minister of Defense refused to let him return. He suggested that Peeta come to the Capitol to recover but Peeta's commander said he would be better to stay in 2. I really don't know what happened next. Peeta doesn't talk about it, obviously, and no one seems to know how he recovered or how long it took. From what I've heard, after he recovered, his commander was promoted and Peeta became dedicated to becoming a good soldier. That was that."

"How do you know all of this, Haymitch? What are you involved with?"

"I think you know the answer to that, sweetheart. And if Peeta trusted you to tell you what he knew, that means you're now in on it too."

"No," she shook her head and dragged Peeta backwards. "I'm not getting in on anything that will risk my sister's life."

"You really want Prim growing up in a world like this? You think she can escape the Reaping bowl for the next few years?"

"I'll keep her name out," she protested. "With the money that Peeta is giving me-"

"That just takes care of her future entries. It doesn't eliminate her entries now! Katniss, don't you see? We can change the world for the better. We can actually save Panem!"

"I don't want to hear it, Haymitch. You're talking rebellion. Traitors. And you actually sent Peeta into the Capitol as a spy, knowing he could be hurt!"

"Peeta volunteered for this," he raised his voice. "He knows the risks, as we all do. He agreed so he could have a chance to protect you!"

"How is this protecting me? I'm here in the Capitol, about to have breakfast with the man I hate most in this world. I was almost raped in front of a room full of people and my husband was nearly sold to a sixteen year old girl. How exactly do you think we can help anyone?"

"This is bigger than you think, Katniss," Haymitch said softly. "We actually have a shot now. We need every district on our side, to stand up to the Capitol."

"No more games, Haymitch," she said angrily. "You tell me what you know or you get the hell out." He glanced at Peeta and sighed.

"Alright. But not here. I know a place where we can talk freely. If you can hold out for a couple of hours, I'll take you and Peeta after breakfast and I'll tell you

everything."

"I thought you said this room isn't bugged."

"Well I hope to high heaven it's not cause if it is, we're all dead," he heaved a great sigh. "Just humor me, sweetheart. Let's get through breakfast and then I'll tell you what you want to know."

"You'll answer my questions? Tell me what you know about my father?"

"I'll tell you what you want to know," he repeated. "We really need to do something to help Peeta before we go. We can't draw any suspicion to ourselves and he isn't looking so good."

"Let me see about washing his face and changing his shirt," she noticed he had sweated through the shirt he was wearing. "We will meet you downstairs." Haymitch nodded, giving Peeta one last sad look, before he left the room. Katniss grunted under Peeta's weight as she half dragged him into the bathroom.

"Come on Peeta, I need you to stay with me." She sat him on the toilet seat and wet a towel. She knelt in front of him and brought it to his face. He jumped at the cold and his eyes flew open in terror.

"Hey," she said soothingly, resting a hand on his arm. "It's ok. It's just me."

"Katniss?" She bit her lip at how weak and vulnerable his voice sounded.

"It's me," she nodded. "How are you feeling?"

"I… what happened?"

"What do you remember?" He rubbed the back of his neck, looking bewildered.

"Not much," he admitted. "Wasn't Haymitch here?"

"Yes. We will meet him downstairs in a few minutes. Peeta, do you remember anything else? Think really hard."

"Um… we were talking to Haymitch. And he mentioned…" he frowned, shaking his head. "Why can't I remember?" He hit himself in the forehead and she grabbed his hand.

"Don't," she shook her head, remembering how he had attacked himself only moments ago. "It's ok. You had some sort of fit."

"A fit? Did I hurt you?"

"Of course not." He rose up off the seat, his eyes widening in horror.

"Katniss, did I do anything to you?"

"No Peeta, I'm fine! Sit back down. You need to calm down." But his heart was racing and he started to sweat again. If Katniss had seen one of his attacks… oh please no. He squeezed his eyes shut and his hands covered his eyes.

"I'm sorry, Katniss," he groaned into his hands.

"Peeta," she said sharply, yanking his hands down and holding them. "Stop apologizing. This isn't your fault. None of it is." Haymitch had to know everything. He had known about Peeta's torture. Had he told Katniss?

He knew she would demand to know. He tried to hide his face again. He couldn't bring himself to look at her.

But Katniss was not having it. She grasped his chin and said his name until he opened his eyes.

"This is not your fault," she said slowly. "And you don't need to be embarrassed around me."

"Now you know the truth," he shook his head, blinking back tears. "You know what a monster I am."

"For the last time, you are NOT a monster. The Capitol bastards who did this to you are the monsters. They poisoned you, Peeta! How could you possibly blame yourself?"

"I wasn't strong enough," he shook his head, the tears falling freely. "I wasn't strong enough to fight it. I let them take my memories and I… I couldn't do anything. They changed me. They made me do horrible things and I… Katniss, what if I hurt you?"

"You couldn't hurt me," she said but he reached up and took her face in his hands.

"You don't know the worst of it. What I've done. My own flesh and blood and I… I forgot who I was. What if I forget who you are? What if I do something terrible to you? You would never forgive me. I would never forgive myself!"

"Peeta," her hands rested on his, her voice gentle. "Peeta, listen to me. You may have done horrible things in the past but this is now. And you overcame it. You fought it off. Whatever you thought of to cure yourself must have worked because you're still here with me, the sweet shy boy I remember. It's who you are inside. You're still you."

"You, Katniss," he said with a choked sob. "I thought of you. Your voice and your silver eyes and your song… you brought me out of it. They tried to take everything… everything about my life in 12 but they must not have known about you, because they didn't touch my memories of you. You were always there, holding out your hand and ready to pull me out of it." She pulled him close, his head crushed to her breast as she tightened her hold on him. He wept into her shirt and she said nothing. Finally, when he had shed his last tear, he pulled away and wiped at his face. She lifted the towel to his face again and gently wiped at his cheeks.

"I don't want this to change anything," she said softly. "I don't want you to feel any differently around me. And I hope you know you can tell me anything."

"I didn't know Haymitch knew," he mumbled. "And I would rather have told you than you finding out from someone else but I guess it's good that you know. I wasn't ready to tell you and don't know when I would be ready. Now you know the truth."

"We don't have to talk about it anymore," she pushed his damp hair out of his red-rimmed eyes. "But if you need to, I'm here, ok? Whenever you want to talk, know that I'm right here." He managed a weak smile and he nodded.

"I'll keep that in mind."

"You do that. Let me grab you a clean shirt." He whipped the sodden shirt over his head and wiped himself with the cloth while Katniss dug through his bag for a new one. She brought it back to the bathroom and knelt in front of him.

"Peeta… when Haymitch said he knows what is inside you… does that mean that the poison is still inside you?" He glanced at her before leaning forward, resting his elbows on his knees.

"When I came to the Capitol, Duartyr told me not to mention the poisoning. He said it was such a secretive form of torture that hardly anyone knows anything about it or understands it. As far as I know, I'm the only one who was able to… well, pull myself out of it. I won't say I cured myself because as you can see, I still have attacks from time to time. But if I grip onto something, or dig my fingernails into my palms… I'm usually able to snap out of it. The pain helps me focus. It keeps me anchored here. But it was something else this time. I felt myself slipping and then I was sort of drawn back by… a song? Was that you?" She swallowed but said nothing. He sat up and rested his palms on his knees.

"It was you, wasn't it? You were singing to me."

"I just figured, since it seemed to help the other night, maybe it would help again this time."

"It did. I can't explain it but when these attacks come on… it's like I'm floating above my body, watching myself do these horrible things. Not being able to stop myself. But when you sing, I'm grounded and sort of… share my body with someone else. But I'm able to expel him and stop him from hurting anyone else. I know, I must sound insane," he added, seeing the look in her eyes.

"No. It's not insane, Peeta, it's just… god, I hate this for you. It must be exhausting, inside your head. How can you stand it?"

"I used to tell myself that wasn't who I was," he took her hand and pulled it to his cheek. "That I was a good person and my family would be ashamed to see what I had become. But it didn't always work. When I thought of my mother, I just became angrier. Wondering if she would actually like me now that I wasn't so weak. She wouldn't hit me or call me pathetic. It just enraged me even more, and it was hard to stay grounded." She scowled, hating his mother even more.

"But with you," he said gently, threading his fingers in hers. "I hear your voice telling me that I'm good. That I'm no monster. All those wonderful things you told me back in 12. And last night. And it made the pain go away faster. I was able to focus and remember who I was."

"So I guess you're stuck with me til death, then, if I'm the only one who can snap you out of it." He smiled and leaned in close, pressing his forehead to hers.

"That's what I'm counting on."

"Ok, we really need to get going. Are you feeling any better?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. You said we're meeting Haymitch downstairs?"

"There's something else, Peeta. I told Haymitch… ok, I demanded to know what he is keeping from us. After breakfast, he's going to tell us everything." His eyes widened.

"He has a safe house, I'm assuming?"

"He said he would take us somewhere where we can talk freely. He said we have a real shot at rebellion. But I want to know what he knows about my dad and what all of this has to do with him."

"Then let's get through breakfast so we can finally get some answers."

* * *

 _ **I'm sorry it's so short you guys but I figured any story is better than none ;) I leave for NYC next week so I'm gunna try my hardest to post again before I leave! XOXOX**_


	36. Chapter 36

Peeta was still a little bit shaky but she wrapped her arm around his waist and supported his weight so no one would notice. Haymitch wasn't alone when they came down to the lobby. Chaff, Seeder, and to Katniss's displeasure, Johanna Mason. She smiled, more like smirked, when she saw the two of them and Katniss immediately wondered if she could tell they'd had sex.

"Well good morning, Captain. Mrs. Mellark."

"Miss Mason," Peeta nodded. "I hope you're well?"

"Splendid, Captain Mellark. Just splendid." Katniss raised her brow at Johanna's sarcasm.

"Well, we are meeting the rest of our party at the mansion. Shall we?" Haymitch's eyes scanned Peeta but he had to admit, he wouldn't have been able to say that there was anything wrong. He decided he needed to have his contacts update their files on the hijacking. Peeta could actually teach them a lot about this form of torture. They could help other victims, if they were able to gather enough information. He had been told Peeta would be violent and wouldn't be able to recover from an attack quickly. But clearly, Katniss was a better healer than she realized. Haymitch wondered if having the couple on their side could boost their chances. He thought so. He hadn't seen a pair of fighters like this in a long time.

* * *

Haymitch ordered a larger car and Katniss's eyes widened when she saw it.

"Close your mouth, Brainless, you're catching flies," Johanna laughed. Peeta wrapped his arm around his wife's shoulders and helped her scoot into the extended seat. He sat beside her, Chaff on his other side with Haymitch and Johanna and Seeder across from them.

"Have Cecilia and Porter left yet, Haymitch?"

"Arcadia and Porter left this morning, and Cecilia caught a train late last night. They all said to tell you it was a pleasure to meet both of you. They hope to see you again soon."

"I wish I'd had a chance to say farewell. All three of them were very pleasant. Cecilia told me I must visit District 8 soon."

"Cece is pregnant again, isn't she," Chaff grinned. Peeta's eyes widened.

"Pregnant? Really? That's wonderful!"

"What's the matter, Captain? Surprised that some Victors actually have families?" Johanna was no longer smiling and Peeta fixed his stony gaze on her.

"Not at all, Miss Mason. I wish happiness to each and every Victor. Even the ones who try to pretend they have no heart."

"It was one of the many things the Capitol stole from me," she hissed.

"Hey," Haymitch reached over and patted her lap. "Let's cool it. We're all on the same side here."

"Are we? Because the last time I checked, he's a Peacekeeper. A recently promoted Peacekeeper, I might add. Why would he be interested in overthrowing the Capitol?"

"Because I come from District 12," Peeta leaned forward before Haymitch had a chance to speak. "Just like this Victor here. And I still live in fear for my family, for my wife and her family. That's why I want to help."

"Oh of course," she rolled her eyes. "We all have to protect Katniss Everdeen! Heaven forbid anything happens to the daughter of the Mo-"

"Johanna!" Haymitch's face was red and Seeder actually scooted away from him. Johanna rolled her eyes.

"Would you shut your fucking mouth for once in your life," he growled.

"Keep telling me what to do, old man," she twisted around to face him. "I'm this close to backing out of the whole thing."

"No you're not. Because you've lost just as much as I have."

"As most of us have," Seeder said gently, leaning around Haymitch to pat Johanna's knee. "And it's natural to feel angry and suspicious but Haymitch is right. We need both of them on our side." Johanna cast Peeta and Katniss a disgusted look.

"Whatever," she leaned against her seat and crossed her arms, staring out the window. Haymitch exhaled deeply.

"Anyway, I've decided that after breakfast, I am taking Peeta and Katniss to the Boutique. They've both asked a lot of questions, understandably, and we owe them some answers. You're all welcome to come as well. Finnick already said he and Annie will be there. Cecilia wanted to join but I told her to go on home to her kids."

"Count me in," Chaff nodded, smiling. "I want to see if the girl on fire winds up punching your lights out, Haymitch." Katniss's brow furrowed and Haymitch shook his

head.

"If you're going to be this helpful, Chaff, you can go back to the hotel."

"Kidding, I'm kidding Abernathy." Seeder rolled her eyes as if she were tired of the both of them. Katniss was certainly getting there.

"Anyone want a drink," Haymitch asked, reaching over to the tray of bottles and pouring himself a glass. Peeta waved his hand and shook his head while Katniss continued to stare out the window. Thoughts of rebellion raced through her head as they drove to the city. What else did Haymitch know? How was she going to sit through breakfast with Snow, knowing that many of the people in the room were plotting something? She just wanted assurance that it would work and that no one would get hurt. Her sister and her husband, especially.

Peeta seemed to know what she was thinking and squeezed her hand. She glanced at him out of the corner of her eye and he gave her a small smile.

"Well, story time to entertain you all during the ride," Chaff raised his hands in the air, looking excited.

"Chaff," Seeder sighed and shook her head. Haymitch scrubbed at his face.

"Quiet. They haven't heard the story yet!"

"Everyone in Panem has heard the story," Haymitch grunted but he took a sip from his glass and gestured for his friend to continue.

"It was a dark and stormy night in the Arena," Chaff said dramatically, his eyes wide. "The night I lost my arm…"

* * *

When they pulled up to the mansion, Haymitch put his finger to his lips and gave them a pointed look.

"Just remember there are cameras and spies everywhere. Be careful what you say. Try not to call attention to yourselves."

"Like that can be helped," Johanna muttered as she jumped out of the car. Katniss glared at her back and Haymitch sighed.

"Just ignore her. She's tough and hard to get to know but she's a real ally." Katniss doubted that. She figured Johanna would prefer to slice her throat rather than be allies. But what did she mean, when she was saying they had to protect her? Daughter of the what? She knew whose daughter she was. A coal miner and a Healer. Half Seam and half Merchant, although she didn't look it. Katniss looked more Seam than most. She wished she had more pictures of her father. She was beginning to forget what he looked like and she hated that. Haymitch nudged her and her head shot up.

"Stay by her side, Peeta." Peeta nodded and offered his arm to her.

Servants bowed low as they passed and some even lowered to the floor. Katniss stared as they walked into the mansion. Who were they bowing for? A Peacekeeper Captain, or a Victor? She felt strange and very out of place as they entered, immediately being lead to the dining room. She was glad to see there weren't nearly as many people as there were at the parties. Only a handful of Victors sat at the table, with Snow at the head.

"I'm so glad you could join us," Snow said as he rose to his feet. "Captain, you and your wife sit here beside Miss Cresta. Mr. Abernathy, you may sit there. And Miss Seeder, yes, please take that seat. Mr. Chaff… please sit down, good sir."

"Apologies, Mr. President," Chaff abandoned his attempt at kissing Cashmere's hand and took his seat.

"Thank you all for joining me this morning. I just wanted to see all of you before you return to your home districts. And to thank you for your cooperation and your assistance. My dear Aurelia had a splendid birthday, and thanks you all for coming. And thank you, Caspian, for making her birthday extra special." Peeta felt sick at the gleam in Snow's eyes, and Caspian looked very smug. Well, he could be smug about deflowering a sixteen year old girl, Peeta thought. Better him than me. Or anyone else at this table.

Snow raised a hand and the servants set down covered plates on the table. Peeta sucked in a breath as the cover was removed and revealed the biggest pile of pancakes with heaps of bacon, sausage, and eggs. Katniss frowned at her plate, wishing she could take all of it back to Prim. She could imagine her sister's wide eyes at the sight of so much food.

"So, let us discuss Caspian's upcoming Victory Tour," Snow said, smiling at the man on his right. Caspian looked smug, with his blonde, almost white hair slicked back and his cold black eyes flicking from Victor to Victor. Peeta swallowed as he inspected the table. He was the only Peacekeeper present. Not even Generals Duartyr or Thread were there. Nor the Minister of Defense. His stomach twisted as he tried to think of a reason why Snow wanted them both there. This was just supposed to be Victors.

His palm grew damp and he fumbled for Katniss's hand. She raised her brow at how sweaty his hand was but she said nothing as he rested them on his knee. She could eat with one hand. He grounded her, his warmth reassuring and steady. She missed most of what Snow was saying, concentrating on the feel of her hand in his.

"Mr. Odair, can I count on you and Miss Cresta to welcome Caspian into 4?"

"Of course, President Snow," Finnick said smoothly, inclining his head. "We will be happy to show you around, Mr. Underthorn. Mags is so looking forward to

meeting you as well."

"Ah yes, your old mentor," Caspian said. Even his voice was oily, Katniss thought. "Why didn't she attend this week's festivities?"

"The poor thing fell last week," Annie said, her voice trembling. "Almost broke her hip. She was unable to travel, due to her doctor's orders."

"Yes, I did miss her company this time," Snow said, his eyes glittering. "Although she hardly says much anymore." Katniss saw Finnick throw the President a glare but the Victor's face went back to neutral so quickly, she wondered if she had imagined it.

"She… had a stroke," Annie said softly.

"Yes. Tragic," Snow said. "Well, thank you all for being so accommodating. Caspian, you should have a wonderful tour. Cashmere, Gloss, I expect you to inform me if anything goes wrong."

"Of course, President Snow," Gloss said with a cheeky smile.

"Now then, Caspian, how would you feel about another person joining you on the train?" Caspian actually looked taken aback.

"Sir?"

"I've been informed that this is Mrs. Mellark's first time out of District 12," he motioned to Katniss and Peeta stiffened beside her. "I think we should send her on a tour of Panem, so she can see what she has been missing. What do you think?"

"Sir… if it pleases you," Caspian said finally, shooting Katniss a disgusted look.

"President Snow," Haymitch chuckled nervously. "Surely you are forgetting that Mrs. Mellark's husband is a fine Peacekeeper and a Captain at that. He would be able to keep watch over the Victors, to ensure their safety. And I'm certain he would rather stay by his wife's side."

"Yes," Snow's eyes narrowed on Peeta. "Of course. What do you say, Mr. Mellark?"

"I would be honored, President Snow," Peeta bowed his head. "I shall of course protect our Victors. And I'm certain Katniss is grateful to you for thinking of her."

"Very grateful, Mr. President," Katniss said softly. "You honor me."

"I should like for anyone connected to the Capitol to know more of our fine country. I understand Captain Mellark has seen various districts so you should visit them as well. Perhaps then you can make the decision as to which district you would choose to relocate to."

"There's much to consider when making this decision," Peeta said, lifting his glass toward Snow. "But we will inform you immediately as soon as we have decided where we would like to go."

"Splendid. Caspian's tour launches in a month. That gives you some time to return to 12, gather your affairs in order, and be ready to relocate as soon as the tour concludes. For your safety, I will have Minister Antonius assemble a team of Peacekeepers to accompany you three back to 12."

"That's really not necessary, sir, though we appreciate the-"

"On the contrary, I think it's very necessary. I understand there is much anti-peacekeeper sentiment flaring around the district at the moment." Peeta swallowed and lowered his eyes to the table.

"Yes," Snow continued. "A soldier of yours, Murphy, isn't it? Attacked and maimed by his own district people. I have given General Thread permission to deliver just punishments for this heinous crime. Justice will prevail."

"We still have no idea who might have done this," Peeta said softly. "In my absence I have asked my brother to gather clues and keep searching-"

"His tongue was cut out, wasn't it Captain? Someone took it upon themselves to turn him into an Avox?"

"That's… that's correct, sir."

"Minister Antonius tells me that you believe it was a Peacekeeper who committed the crime." Peeta gulped loudly, trying to ignore all of the sets of eyes on him at the moment. Katniss squeezed his hand under the table.

"It's a theory, sir. Thought it was a messy job, there are not many people who know how to… carry out such orders. And it would not be the first time that a peacekeeper resisted authority in 12."

"Ah yes. You were attacked yourself, were you not? I remember Minister Antonius informing me of this. Three Peacekeepers attacked you and your wife."

"They have been dealt with, sir," he said in a flat tone.

"Yes, I heard. Well done, Captain. You are right that not many people know how to carry out such orders. It seems, however, that you are one of the few." Peeta's eyes widened in horror. Was Snow trying to implicate him, here in front of the Victors?

"I'm sure the Victors would agree with me when I say, it is nice to know we have Peacekeepers who are not afraid to follow orders and who will do what they must, for the good of Panem." Snow threw pointed looks toward the Victors and they all started to murmur in agreement.

"Enough chatter. Enjoy your breakfast. There are some matters I must tend to. If you'll all excuse me." Snow faltered for just a moment and an Avox looked ready to rush to his side. A quick deadly glare from the President made the servant freeze and she stepped back, her hands folded behind her back. Snow disappeared from the room and several of the Victors fell into easy conversation. Others, like Finnick and Annie, remained silent, their eyes on their plates.

"What are they doing here anyway," Cashmere hissed across the table, her eyes on Peeta and Katniss. "Neither of them are Victors."

"Yeah, what's with inviting rabble onto the train," her brother shook his head. "Since when does a Victor cater to a Peackeeper?"

"I would be careful, Mr. Gloss," Peeta said loudly, causing the room to fall silent. "It's President Snow's soldiers who protect you when you leave your district. It doesn't matter where we come from, we Peacekeepers exist for the good of Panem. What does President Snow keep Victors around for?"

"I'm a Hunger Games Victor, boy," Gloss spat as he jumped to his feet. "I can tear you apart with my bare hands."

"And you think just because I haven't competed in the Hunger Games, that I couldn't do the same," Peeta said calmly, looking almost amused.

"I'll rip your-"

"Gloss," Finnick leaned over and pulled him back into his seat. "Have a seat, will you? Your eggs are getting cold." Gloss shot Peeta a glare and sat back down.

"To answer your question, Gloss, it's not uncommon to have peacekeepers accompany a Victor on their Victory Tour. It just hasn't been done for awhile because there has been heavy training for the last ten years and peacekeepers couldn't be spared." Everyone cast Haymitch a surprised look, Peeta included.

"Of course you'd come to their defense, old man. You're District 12 trash just like them."

"I think I'll make a call to General Thread," Peeta said as he stood up. "He comes from your district and would be interested to hear how disrespectful you are towards soldiers. General Thread, in particular, takes pride in his station and his duties."

"Are you threatening me, 12?"

"Yes, I believe I am," Peeta said, cocking his head.

"Captain Mellark, please sit down. Gloss, shut up," Haymitch said through gritted teeth.

"You wait until next year, Haymitch. I'll make sure your tributes don't live through the night."

"Well then I'll thank you for putting them out of their misery so quickly," the older Victor snapped. Annie whimpered and began to rock back and forth in her seat. Finnick slammed his hands on the table.

"Everyone, PLEASE, take a seat."

"You don't tell me what to do, Odair," Gloss growled.

"Do you really want to start something, Gloss," Johanna crossed her arms. "Because I would be glad to finish it for you."

"Look, the President knew we were going to fight and invited a Peacekeeper to maintain control," Seeder waved toward Peeta. He was pretty certain that's not why he was invited but he remained silent.

"So can we please all just calm down and enjoy breakfast? We are all heading home to our own districts soon anyway." Seeder seemed to be the voice of reason, Katniss thought, because people took their seats and aside from a few dirty looks, the subject was dropped.

"You just had to pick a fight with District 1," Haymitch muttered under his breath to Peeta.

"I didn't-"

"Finish your breakfast and let's get out of here," he sighed. "We're expected at the Boutique soon."

"I'm finished," Katniss said, throwing her napkin onto the full plate of food. Peeta stood and helped Katniss to her feet but the Avox tentatively tapped his shoulder and he tensed up.

"Is President Snow requesting to see me?" She nodded, lowering her head. Peeta nodded and put on a smile.

"Go with Haymitch. I'll be along in a moment."

"But-"

"Come on, Mrs. Mellark," Haymitch pulled Katniss from the table. Peeta shot her a look over his shoulder as he followed the Avox from the room. He tried to tell her not to worry, but his heart was racing.

* * *

The Avox lead him to Snow's sitting room, where the President was seated in a chair, signing papers that a man was handing to him.

"Captain Mellark. Please, have a seat." Peeta sat in the chair opposite the President and waited. Snow signed a few more papers, then handed the man his pen and waved him off. The men bowed low before retreating from the room, not even raising up and turning around.

"I trust you know why you're here, Captain."

"I confess I don't, sir," he replied hesitantly. Snow looked slightly surprised.

"Do you love her, Captain? Truly?"

"Sir?"

"Your wife, Mellark. General Thread informs me it was an arranged marriage. A contract, to be exact." How had Thread found out about that? Peeta swallowed and rubbed his knees.

"It is a contract, sir, I won't lie to you. But I love her with all my heart. I always have. I bought her contract from Commander Thread. I just wanted to rescue her but she agreed to marry me."

"And does she love you?"

"I…" Why was this any of his business, Peeta thought angrily. What was Snow playing at?

"Yes. We're very happy together."

"Then I trust you to do what I say, to keep her safe. I need you to remove her from 12."

"Sir?"

"You are a good soldier, Mellark, one of our best, it seems. General Duartyr speaks very highly of you. Even General Thread trusts you. What do you know of your wife's father?"

* * *

 _ **I hope all my American friends had a wonderful Thanksgiving! I'm sorry it's so short- my trip to NYC was amazing but I'm exhausted and now getting sick. I'll post again next week, maybe even this weekend if I can get this chapter finished! XOXOX**_


	37. Chapter 37

Katniss waited impatiently next to Haymitch, checking back over her shoulder to see if Peeta was joining them yet. He had been with Snow for nearly an hour, and most of the Victors had already left. Haymitch had whispered to Chaff that he would arrange a ride for himself and for Katniss and Peeta, and Chaff urged Johanna to share a car with him.

"Tell me he's alright, Haymitch," she muttered, wrapping her arms around herself. "Tell me nothing bad has happened."

"He's a smart kid, sweetheart," he said softly. "I'm sure he's fine."

"What if he found out? What if they get to him, and-"

"Katniss," Haymitch gripped her arm. "Don't. He's fine." She sighed and nearly cried out with relief when she saw Peeta emerge from the mansion. She stopped herself from rushing toward him but threw her arms around him when he was near enough.

"I'm ok," he mumbled against her hair.

"Come on. Car's ready," Haymitch gestured toward the car. The driver looked very grumpy.

"Actually, Haymitch, I was hoping we could walk. It's such a lovely day out." Haymitch frowned and pulled his coat around himself.

"You want to walk? To the Boutique?"

"Yes." Peeta looked unyielding and Haymitch's eyes narrowed.

"Change of plans, sir. Thanks for your patience. Here." Haymitch tossed the driver a coin and the driver muttered bitterly as he drove off. Peeta held out his arm for Katniss and lead them down the path.

"You'd better have a damn good reason for this," Haymitch said, his teeth chattering.

"The cars are bugged. He's watching all of you, Haymitch."

"He told you that?"

"He told me a lot. Here, let's get around the block and we can hail a cab. I'll tell you everything when we get to the Boutique."

"Does he know where we're going," Katniss asked, pulling her coat up over her face. Peeta draped his arm around her shoulder and did his best to warm her up.

"No. He thinks the Victors are all going home. He's going to send a team of Peacekeepers to escort us to the train station tomorrow morning."

"Joy," Haymitch muttered. "It's cold as a dead man's balls out here, would you kids hurry up!" Katniss snorted at the Victor's words but they sped up to keep up with him, their faces lowered against the cold wind. It was much warmer back in 12, with summer right around the corner. Katniss thought the mountains were beautiful but it was too cold here.

"Why do you think he's moving the Victory Tour up? Isn't it usually around the Harvest Festival?"

"Caspian apparently requested it. He says he has something important in his district around fall, and asked if he could go on his tour during the summer instead. I guess when you're a Victor, they'll make any allowances for you."

"You be careful, kid," Haymitch came to a stop and shook a finger at him. "You need to quit picking fights with Victors and insinuating that you're better than them. You're not making friends that way."

"I'm not afraid of Gloss, if that's what you're referring to."

"Gloss is just one Victor. 1 and 2 have tons of them, Careers who murdered for their place of glory. And they're all friends. You just don't need that kind of animosity between you, alright?" Peeta shrugged and Haymitch huffed impatiently before surging forward. Peeta glanced at his wife and saw her wince against the cold.

"Come here." He opened his coat and pulled her against his chest, pulling the coat closed around them both. She sighed contentedly, lifting her face to nuzzle against his neck.

"Better?"

"How are you so warm," she positively purred. He chuckled and kissed her temple.

"Just born that way. It was awful in the summers when we kept the ovens on. But it's good in the winters. I'm like a human campfire."

"Well that's good for me then," she leaned back against him.

"WILL YOU TWO HURRY UP?"

"Think I should offer to let Haymich in too," he laughed, holding the coat open.

"I don't think there's enough room. And I have special wife privileges."

"Ok," he laughed, sliding his coat off and wrapping it around her shoulders. "Come on, I think Haymitch is about ready to knock me out for making him walk."

They met Haymitch at the corner and they hailed a cab, which thankfully didn't take too long.

"Boutique on 5th," Haymitch grunted, rubbing his hands.

"The Boutique is closed today, sir."

"I know that. Just take us there. Please." The driver shrugged and turned around the corner. Katniss curled up into Peeta's side while Haymitch tried to warm up his hands.

"Why is it so damn cold today?"

"The Capitol has had such nice weather lately," the driver said. "Today is supposed to be the coldest day of the year."

"Lucky us," the Victor grumbled, crossing his arms tightly.

* * *

The drive didn't take long and Haymitch handed the driver a few coins, thanking him for sharing the heat. Peeta glanced at the locked doors and raised a brow.

"Is someone expecting us?"

"Around here." Haymitch lead them around the back and looked around. The streets were completely empty. Peeta figured it was too cold for anyone to go outside. Haymitch rapped his knuckles against the door three times and the door pushed open.

"Password," a voice hissed.

"Mockingjay." The door opened wider and they slipped inside. The door closed again and Katniss's eyes widened at the figure who was behind the door. She was tall and slender, with a fur coat that trailed the floor. That wasn't the surprising part though. It was her face that caught Katniss by surprise. She had black and gold stripes tattooed across her face with a snout for a nose. Whiskers emerged from her face, long and pointed. Her tawny eyes were narrowed into slits as she surveyed them.

"Tigris, do you remember me? Haymitch Abernathy from District 12?"

"Haymitch," the woman purred. "She didn't say there would be others with you though."

"I don't think she knew I would be bringing these two along. Is she here already?"

"Yes. They all are."

"Yeah, we had to walk a ways," he threw Peeta an irritated look.

"Or we could have taken a bugged car," Peeta threw back at him. Haymitch shook his head.

"Can you take us to them?" Tigris bowed and lead the way down the hall and through the store.

"Tigris was a stylist in the Games," Haymitch whispered to them. "Until Snow decided she wasn't attractive anymore. They decided she'd gotten too much done and she was sort of exiled here."

"Here? She works at the Boutique?"

"She helps Ellie and her team. Come on." Tigris lead them through several sets of doors, until they came to a large room that was full of people. Katniss's eyes widened in surprise. She'd known some of the Victors were in on the rebellion but she hadn't realized how many. Peeta surveyed the crowd and his eyes widened as a man approached him.

"Welcome to the Resistance, Peeta."

"General Duartyr?"

"Call me, Felix. After all, we're on the same side."

"We… we are? I mean, what do you mean?"

"It's ok, Peeta," his general gave him a kind smile. "Drop the pretense. There are no spies here. I'm here for the same reason you are. To bring the Capitol crashing to its knees." Peeta swallowed, his mind racing.

"How long-?"

"Have I been a spy in the Capitol? Years. Since my sister died in the Hunger Games. She was one of the few who didn't volunteer. Most of us are here because we've lost someone to the Games, or to Snow." Duartyr turned to Katniss and his smile softened. His eyes reflected respect and admiration. He knelt on one knee and took her hand in his.

"I swear to you, Katniss Everdeen Mellark, I will serve and protect you until my dying breath."

"Um, alright...thanks," Katniss jerked her hand back, her brow furrowing in confusion.

"Felix, you're frightening the girl," a deep voice said behind them. Duartyr got to his feet, looking embarrassed.

"My apologies, Madame. I just wanted… well, I just wanted to meet her."

"You've met her," a woman said, resting her hand on his shoulder. "Now I would like to meet her as well."

"Of course. Katniss Mellark, this is Commander Lyme of District 2."

"Lyme," Peeta said, looking dazed. "As in the Victor Lyme?" Katniss remembered seeing the woman at Aurelia's birthday party but she hadn't been present at breakfast this morning.

"The very same, Mr. Mellark. Welcome to our Headquarters." Peeta glanced around and shook his head.

"This is all… so difficult to understand."

"I understand your confusion," Lyme said gently. "Nevertheless, it was time that you know about us. Especially since Haymitch invited you into the Resistance. And you shared what you knew with your wife."

"Which wasn't much," he grumbled in response. "Haymitch has kept a lot from me, it seems."

"That was our orders, I'm afraid. We didn't want to risk all of our hard work and intel falling into the wrong hands. Felix has kept us informed of your… condition over the years, but since this is still so new, we couldn't be sure."

"My condition? You mean my..." he couldn't bring himself to say 'torture'.

"Hijacking, Peeta," Duartyr said delicately. "I told Haymitch what I knew and he passed the information on to Katniss, I believe. So she can understand a little bit better."

"Great. You'll have to explain it to me too since I was out of it when Haymitch decided to talk about me behind my back."

"It isn't like that, my boy," Duartyr gripped Peeta's shoulder. "Haymitch volunteered to accompany you to the Capitol and I told him all I knew about what happened to you. So many parts of it are still a mystery, which is why I told you to keep quiet about it when you last visited the Capitol. What happened if the Capitol found out you are a spy, and captured you? They have ways of making you talk, Peeta. You already know too much. You are the last person I would want in the Resistance. Not because I don't trust you, but because you're in danger every minute."

"If you recall, I'm not new to danger."

"I do recall. And I recall how you acted after I got you out of there. I doubt that you do, though. You didn't know yourself, Peeta. You didn't trust anyone. You were angry and terrifyingly strong. You attacked me. I didn't know if… I sent Madame Lyme a message, saying I wasn't sure if we had lost you or not. It surprised us all when you started to return to your old self. Haemon had been administering the poison for several months before I found out. That's a lot of venom in your bloodstream, Peeta."

"Why did Haemon hate me so much?"

"I can't answer that. I still don't know. I reported him to Minister Antonius and whisked you away from there as fast as I could. I hid you in my own attic until you were well again. I just told the other soldiers and commanders that you had gone to the Capitol to get some medicine for your injuries. Madame Lyme thought it would be a bad idea for many people to know about the hijacking. It could be used against you."

"Which is why we hesitated to tell you anything," Lyme broke in. "Antonius and Haemon know about the hijacking. Snow does too. And anyone else Antonius has told. We have to be careful, because we just aren't sure what could happen if you were hijacked again. Would you remember everything, or would you forget? We can't be sure. The person who knows the most about hijacking doesn't really know either."

"Who knows about it," Peeta forgot to be upset, looking around the room anxiously. An older man approached, pushing his glasses up his nose.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Captain Mellark. I'm Beetee."

"Another Victor," Peeta said softly.

"This room is full of Victors," Duartyr waved his hand. "They're the most angry. Many of them have lost everything." His eyes rested on Johanna for a moment before turning back to Peeta and Katniss.

"Does everyone know? About what happened to me?"

"No. Beetee, Felix, and myself are the only ones. Aside from Haymitch, who we told when we asked him to keep an eye on you."

"Then why do some of the Victors hate me so much? You're a Peacekeeper and you're a part of the Resistance. Why are some angry that I want to help?"

"If you're referring to Johanna, don't take it personally. She doesn't take kindly to any Peacekeepers," Lyme muttered, glancing over at Johanna. "District 7 Soldiers murdered her whole family in front of her when she returned from her Games. Shot them point blank. It's not really her fault."

"That's horrible," Katniss whispered.

"Hey, I hate to break up the party over here," Haymitch stepped in between Lyme and Duartyr. "You want to share your findings with the rest of the room?"

"I was just talking to him about the hijacking, Haymitch," Duartyr said irritably.

"Ok but we have more important things to talk about right now," he said, looking pointedly at Katniss.

"Right." Duartyr took a step back and Peeta and Katniss turned around to face Haymitch. The whole room was staring at them and Katniss fidgeted nervously. Cinna and Chase gave her encouraging smiles from across the room and she fumbled for Peeta's hand.

"Right. Let's get this meeting started, shall we? Everyone, I'd like to formally introduce you to Captain Peeta Mellark and his wife, Katniss Everdeen-Mellark."

"She looks just like him," someone whispered.

"She has his eyes."

"I heard she's just as good with the bow."

"Haymitch," Peeta said through gritted teeth and Haymitch stepped forward, holding up his hands.

"The kids here don't know anything yet. Let's be gentle as we can, ok?"

"We don't have time for gentle," Johanna snapped. "You've already compromised this by inviting way too many Peacekeepers into this."

"Some of us have been a part of the Resistance longer than you've been alive, darling," Duartyr snapped. Johanna glared at him.

"Jo, I'm serious, if you can't get along with the members of the Resistance, you'll be asked to leave," Lyme said sternly. To Katniss's surprise, Johanna fell silent.

"Haymitch, why don't you begin?"

"Jesus," Haymitch said under his breath. "Alright, look Katniss. The Resistance has been around… a long time. And I haven't always been a part of it. Your dad was the one who dragged me to a meeting."

"What?"

"He was the best friend I ever had, sweetheart. We grew up together in the Seam. He came to say goodbye to me right after my Reaping. Asked me to come back home because he… he'd never had a truer friend, he said." Peeta swore Haymitch's voice was breaking.

"Anyway, after I lost my three district partners, I was so furious with the Capitol. I was determined to win. I watched my good friend Maysilee die right in front of me, and she made me swear to win. It came down to me and one other, Sabina Greggories, and I fought like hell to leave that arena. I made the Capitol look stupid and they made me pay for it. Just two weeks after I returned to 12, my mother's house caught fire. My girlfriend just happened to be there too. They killed my mother, my little brother, and my girl for making them look like fools. I had lost everything to that man. But Ash… your dad convinced me to attend a meeting and to hear them out. I yelled at him that he was crazy but he was so crazy passionate for the cause. Even when your mother found out and begged for him to stop, he couldn't. He was in too deep."

"You're lying," Katniss spat. "If my mother wanted him to do something, he would. He loved her."

"And he loved you and little Primrose too," Haymitch said tenderly. "Which is why he wanted to fight for a better world. For his girls." She shook her head and stepped back into Peeta.

"How does everyone outside of 12 know about Katniss," he asked softly. Haymitch looked around and nodded.

"Because Ash Everdeen was the Leader of the Rebellion. He would sing songs about his girls playing in a meadow, without starvation or the Games. He created songs about Snow and the horrors of the Capitol. We would record them and broadcast them to other districts. We nicknamed him the Mockingjay, and he became the symbol of the Rebellion." Peeta glanced sideways at Katniss, his jaw wide open. She was deathly pale and her eyes were narrowed.

"If he was your friend, why didn't you help us? Why did you watch us nearly starve to death?"

"I wanted to sweetheart, but Snow was watching me closely. After they killed him, the Rebellion sort of broke up. Ash was their symbol and we were lost without him. It wasn't until someone else came forward to unify the districts that meetings started again and the Rebellion resurfaced. It was decided that one day, Ash's daughter would be the one to continue his work. The daughter he showed pictures of to gain support. The daughter who has his voice and his talent with the bow." Peeta gulped audibly and Katniss looked baffled.

"Snow had Ash Everdeen killed," Peeta said in a hollow voice. "And now you want her to be your new symbol?"

"My dad died in a mining accident," she said dully, shaking her head. Haymitch hung his head and Peeta's lips thinned. He gave the Victor a look that very clearly said

"tell her now".

"Snow found out about Ash and the rebellion. He figured most of Ash's supporters would be miners. He never knew we were broadcasting to other districts. He assumed he was eliminating the threat altogether as soon as Ash died. He ordered their deaths and then he made sure that Violet would never inherit the Apothecary, thinking that without a way to make a living, all three of you would starve to death. He always underestimated Ash and he definitely underestimated you. I watched while you snuck into the woods to feed your family. You showed the same resilience and strength. I knew when you grew up, you would be just like him. And you are, Katniss. He would be so damn proud of you, you know."

"That's why Snow's making me move out of 12."

"If he thinks she's such a threat, why doesn't he just have her killed," Johanna said loudly. Peeta took a step toward her and Duartyr gripped his arm.

"Because he believes there's a slight chance that she could be a weapon for him," Haymitch spat. "A weapon for the Capitol."

"He's crazy if he thinks I would ever fight for him," she shrieked.

"I haven't figured out if he plans to threaten you with something, or offer you something in return. He genuinely seems to trust Peeta. He called him in for a meeting after breakfast."

"Can you tell us what was said, Peeta," Duartyr asked. Peeta wet his lips and nodded. His mind was racing from everything already and he was feeling lightheaded. He turned to face his wife and took her hands.

"Haymitch is telling the truth, Katniss. I don't think Snow realizes just how important your father was to the rebellion but he knew he was spreading ideas and he had him killed. He ordered for it to look like an accident and he thought that once your father was gone, he wouldn't have to worry about rebellion anymore. But like Haymitch said, you were more resilient than he expected. You grew up and that surprised Snow. He seemed to forget about you for a few years but once word of rebellion started to spread again, he suspected you might be behind it. So he sent Thread to investigate you. He had no idea you were my wife, so when Thread discovered your last name and who you were, he reported to Snow. And Snow ordered us both to come to the Capitol, so he could meet you. You enchanted him, Katniss. He asked me today if our marriage is real and if I trust you. I said wholeheartedly to both, and he said he wanted to get you away from 12 in case your father's supporters tried to recruit you. He said there is a fire in you that intrigues him. He told me as long as we are married, he trusts that there will be no further problems or any talk of rebellion. Whether he's trying to keep you safe or not, I don't know, but he is determined to get you out of 12. He trusts me but… I think he's scared of you."

"Of course he is," Haymitch scoffed. "Why do you think he had Ash killed? He knew Ash could reach people. He knows Ash's daughter can do the same."

"Why do you think I can reach anyone," Katniss snapped out of her daze. "I'm just a poor girl from 12. From the Seam. I could barely keep my family and myself fed and I had to marry a disgusting Peacekeeper to keep my little sister alive!" Peeta swallowed as more than a few eyes went to him.

"Katniss entered a contract with the former Commander of 12, Alistair Cray," Haymitch explained. Duartyr's face darkened.

"Peeta left 2 in a hurry. You're telling me he didn't make it back in time to ask her to marry him?"

"Something happened with the train," Peeta said miserably. "We were held up several days. I was… I was unfortunately a little late with my proposal. When I arrived, she had already entered a contract with Cray. My brother Ryen intervened on my behalf, and transferred the purchase."

"Purchase," someone said near the back. "So you bought her?"

"No," Peeta said angrily, whipping around. "I mean, I had the contract transferred to me but I asked her to marry me and we had a toasting ceremony, which is what we do in 12. We're as married as anyone in the Capitol is!"

"But you're still paying her? I mean, I assume that's the terms of the contract, right?" Peeta's eyes narrowed as he searched for the owner of the voice.

"The Peacekeeper Contract is not important right now," Haymitch said loudly, stepping forward. "What's important is that we figure out our next steps. We know Snow knows who she is. And we know he wants her away from 12. So where do we send her?"

"Not here," Cinna said, crossing his arms. "She'd be in more danger than she would be in 12. Snow's guards would never leave her alone." Katniss shivered at the thought.

"2 might not be a bad idea," Lyme said, considering. "We would be able to protect her and she can be in the know with the rebellion. When we launch an attack, I'm sure she will want to be there."

"Hang on, have we even asked her if she wants to be a part of this," Finnick raised a hand. "I mean, you just tell the girl that her father was a symbol of the revolution and that she's his successor. But you never asked her if she wants that responsibility." Katniss stared at Finnick in shock and there was irritated muttering around the room.

"Quiet," Haymitch snapped. "Finnick, I get what you're saying but this is what she's meant for!"

"Who says," Peeta said, frowning. "I'm not saying she would ever fight for Snow, but what makes you think she wants to fight at all? What if she just wants to take her sister and her mother to another district and live peacefully?"

"Whose side are you on," a Victor snarled.

"I'm a Peacekeeper Captain in President Snow's army and I'm married to my childhood crush from District 12. Who happens to be the daughter of the deceased symbol of the rebellion. That's the epitome of a spy, if I've ever seen one."

"I'm not sure if I really believe you're a spy," the man said, his eyes narrowing as he stepped toward Johanna. "You say that Snow trusts you but why should we trust you?"

"Blight-"

"No Haymitch. I know you're all chummy because you're both from 12, but what proof do we have that this Peacekeeper is really on our side? Just his word? Just the fact that he is married to the daughter of the Mockingjay? I'm sorry but I want more proof than that."

"I can't offer you proof," Peeta shook his head. "But I would give my life to keep Katniss safe. And she knows that."

"He took a beating when we were kids, to feed me," she said softly. Peeta gave her a sad smile but Blight scoffed.

"Big deal. He got a spanking. I'm asking why should we trust him now? Why would he want to go against the people who feed him and employ him?" Someone stepped up onto a crate and yanked his shirt over his head. He turned and the crowd gasped at the criss-crossed scars on his back. Though they had healed with time, his back was covered. Peeta's breath left him completely.

"I'm so sorry, Peeta," the man called, still facing the wall. "But some of these people needed to see this. They need to know what the Capitol did to you." The man turned back around, pulling his shirt back on. Katniss's eyes widened in horror when she realized who it was.

"My name is Ryen Mellark. I'm Peeta's older brother. We were both kidnapped from our home when we were younger, and taken to District 2 to become Peacekeepers for Snow's army. My brother was taken away from me for what I was told, separate training. Our Commander didn't like the fact that we came from 12 and said we needed extra conditioning. He said we needed to forget our past and where we had come from. When I asked them where they were taking my brother, they knocked me out. So I learned not to ask questions. Peeta was missing for months. No one would tell me anything. When he returned to me, he didn't know who I was. He didn't recognize his own flesh and blood." Katniss glanced at Peeta, whose eyes were squeezed shut and his trembling hand covered his face.

"They tortured him and called it training. They brain-washed him and made him believe he was a soldier, a weapon. They made him do awful things and he did them without asking any questions. When I realized what had happened, I came forward. And I was punished for it." He faltered for a moment and Duartyr stepped forward.

"Rye is telling the truth. I was there when they ordered Peeta to beat his own brother. Peeta hesitated for a moment but he didn't know who Rye was. He took the whip and he carried out his orders. That was when I decided I had to get him away from there. I hid Peeta in my attic and reported the commander to the Minister for Defense. This poisoning, also called hijacking, was a brand new experiment and it should never have been used on a peacekeeper. No one had any idea I was housing Peeta, but I saw over time that without the continued use of the poison, he was able to clear his mind. When he came to one day, he didn't remember much. It took him some time for his memory to return and we decided we couldn't tell anyone about it. I gave Ryen some time off to recover and he came to see Peeta regularly, reminding him of who he was. I told Ryen and Peeta to keep the incident a secret, since only a few peacekeepers knew what had happened. When both boys had fully recovered, they returned to training and Peeta became a fine soldier, without the use of force or pain. Both boys made me proud. I had a feeling that both of them would agree to fight for the rebellion, when it came time. I reported back to Madame Lyme that I wasn't sure if Peeta would be permanently affected by the trauma and we would just have to wait and see. When Peeta returned to his home district, I reached out to Haymitch and told him everything I knew. He said he would keep an eye on him and I was pleased to hear that the young woman Peeta was returning to court was none other than Miss Everdeen. So we made the decision to recruit Peeta into the Resistance. Haymitch would approach him about attending a meeting, along with the help of several other Peacekeepers, Purnia Calburn, Ryen Mellark and Darius Murphy. Ryen's father-in-law, Mayor Undersee, also attended the meetings and was ready to respond if he was needed. Ryen's wife Madge was brought into a meeting just a few days ago. Peeta informed his wife of what he knew before they came to the Capitol. Haymitch asked Peeta if he would be comfortable acting as a spy in the Capitol, reporting to Snow and then informing us of what Snow is planning. Peeta and I may be Peacekeepers but we believe in a better Panem and are willing to fight for it. That is why I know he is really on our side." Rye crossed his arms and glared at Blight, whose eyes flicked from him to Duartyr to Peeta. Finally, he nodded and took a step back. Rye cleared his throat and pulled someone toward Katniss and Peeta. Katniss gasped as she realized it was Madge and the women threw their arms around each other.

"When did you get here?"

"Just last night. Daddy held a meeting at his house and said Rye and I needed to come to the Capitol." Rye bit his lip and gripped Peeta's arm.

"Peet. I'm sorry."

"I'm so sorry, Rye," he said in a voice choked with tears. The brothers embraced and there was murmuring around the room.

"So now can we get to more important things," Haymitch glared at Blight. "Like what Snow has planned for Katniss?"

"Well we know for sure that he wants her to move out of 12," Chase said solemnly. "Peeta, did you tell him anything about where you would take her?"

"We didn't decide on anything," Peeta said, clearing his throat. "I told him I would discuss it with her and he gave us a month to get our affairs in order. I figured that gives us enough time to get back to 12, pack our things, get Prim and Violet, and move to wherever it is we are going."

"It's essential we get her family out of there and soon," Duartyr nodded. Katniss frowned.

"Why?"

"So he can't use them against you. Snow can quickly discover that the people who mean the most to you can be used to make you do something. That is how he is. It's what he does."

"He's right," Finnick said, swallowing thickly. "We need to get your family out of there, Katniss."

"I wish we had brought them with us," Rye said worriedly. "I'm sorry Katniss, I didn't even think-"

"It's ok, Rye. Mom probably wouldn't have gone anywhere without an explanation anyway. But we need to move quickly then."

"Madge and I made the decision to move too," Rye said, his fists clenched. When he saw Peeta open his mouth to speak, he cut him off. "I'm sorry Peet. Mom said they were staying put. Even when I said their lives may be in danger. And Bing said April is too far along in her pregnancy to try to move somewhere. They don't realize how serious it is."

"You would think after their sons were kidnapped and turned into Peacekeepers, they would be more cautious," Chaff scoffed.

"Mom is set in her cold-hearted ways," Rye shrugged. "And dad is too much of a coward to stand up to her. He goes along with whatever she says or does. He didn't even step forward when his own son was being abused." Rye fixed his eyes on Peeta and Peeta shifted uncomfortably.

"OK, well, the Mellarks are staying put. They didn't have anything to do with the rebellion, so they're probably safe anyway. Has anyone checked on Purnia?"

"She didn't answer the phone when I called last night," Rye said uneasily. Haymitch winced.

"Someone went after Darius, most likely because he was involved. We need someone trustworthy to check on Purnia."

"Hang on," Peeta quickly turned to Duartyr. "You said this morning that you had news of Darius." The General nodded, looking pained.

"Haymitch alerted me when you all arrived here that Thread was trying to separate you and Katniss. The Victors were supposed to help both of you get to the hotel safely and together. You can imagine my surprise, then, when I met with you at Antonius's mansion. I was trying to do some investigating because I'd overheard the Minister telling some of his guards that a prisoner would be arriving in the Capitol by train. From District 12."

"Wait. What?!"

"I was trying to find out what I could when an attendant told me you had arrived. I panicked and sent Plutarch Heavensbee to distract you and more importantly,

watch over you. But it wasn't you I should have been worried about."

"Darius," Katniss said softly. Duartyr nodded sadly.

"Is he-?"

"Thread brought him to the mansion and ordered tracker-jacker venom to be administered."

"Wait. They wanted to hijack him too?"

"Either make him forget about the rebellion, or use him for their side when it came time to fight. But it didn't work. Darius was… I suppose his heart was too weak to fight the poison. He died this morning. They are keeping his body in the Training Center."

"What about Rosalie? What did they do to her?"

"I don't think Rosalie was even on the train," Duartyr shook his head. "I checked with the conductor and saw a list of passengers. Darius was traveling alone."

"Purnia escorted her there herself! And I spoke to her before we left for the train station. Rosalie refused to leave Darius's side."

"Then either someone did something to her back in 12, before the train even left," Lyme said, frowning. "Or she is somewhere here in the Capitol."

"Madame Lyme, she's pregnant," Peeta said desperately. "We need to find her."

"I'll send some soldiers to look for her, Peeta," Duartyr assured him. "We can't arrouse any suspicion, though. We have to be careful, especially since they took Darius in broad daylight."

"This changes things," Haymitch said sharply, shaking his head. "We need to send Rye and Madge somewhere we know they will be safe." Lyme's eyes flashed.

"How do we know they will be safe there?"

"She promised she would be welcoming."

"It's that woman, isn't it," Katniss said loudly and all eyes returned to her. "The woman I saw on the Undersees' TV? The night of Rye's and Madge's wedding, we saw a woman speaking to a crowd on TV," she glanced at Peeta and gestured desperately. "Tell them."

"Yes Katniss. Her name is Alma Coin and she's the President of District 13." Katniss felt as if she had been knocked backwards.

"13?!" Peeta bit his lip and took her hand.

"I wanted to tell you-"

"But you didn't! You didn't tell me that 13 is still around, still… functional?! What have they been doing all this time? Why did they just leave Panem to fend for themselves?"

"For someone so brainless, she raises a fair point," Johanna said. "Why does this woman think we will all of a sudden follow her orders?"

"We're not following her orders. We're all joining together to stand up to the Capitol."

"Whatever way you spin it, 13 has let us deal with the Hunger Games on our own for 77 years! What makes Coin think we want her help?"

"13 dealt in nuclear weapons, Johanna," Lyme said sternly. "They can help us defeat the Capitol. Something we haven't been able to do on our own."

"So maybe we need to send our Mockingjay there too," Haymitch turned to Katniss and Peeta.

"Hang on," Peeta reared up angrily. "You want her to move to a district that is surviving underground, and be the symbol of a rebellion for a woman she has never had any contact with?"

"Look Peeta, I understand you are protective of the girl. And you'll be going with her, so you can watch over her. Keep her safe. But we need a symbol and Katniss is the only one who can do it."

"Have you even heard me trying to make a speech?" She snorted. "I'm awful in front of crowds. I don't know why you think I can sway the districts!"

"You have a powerful weapon, Katniss," Haymitch said gently. "You just have to learn to use it for the fight."

"What are you talking about?"

"Your voice," he said impatiently. "You inherited that gift from Ash! And now you can do what he did and use your voice to get them on our side. Be our Mockingjay. Sing your song!" Katniss looked like she was about to protest again but Peeta pulled her toward him and withdrew something from his pocket. He held it out and it glinted in his palm. Haymitch drew a breath. Katniss took the gold mockingjay pin and studied it.

"This was on my dress the other night."

"Cinna was bold to put it there," Haymitch threw the stylist a look. "But we wanted you to have something of his."

"This was… this belonged to my dad?"

"He asked me to give it to you. Not to influence you to decide to fight, but to remind you that you are his daughter and he loved you fiercely. Ash called you his little songbird." Katniss turned the pin over in her hand.

"So we take my mother and my sister and go to 13. And you think Snow won't search for us?"

"We could say she wants to go live in District 8," Beetee suggested. "It's not terribly far from 13."

"General," Peeta turned back to Duartyr, his brow furrowed. "Do you think Snow knows that 13 is still around?"

"It's doubtful but I can't be certain. Why do you ask?"

"What if that's why Snow is so determined to get Katniss out of 12? Because 12 is too close to 13?" Duartyr and Lyme exchanged concerned looks. Haymitch's eyes widened and Cinna clucked his tongue.

"It's very possible," Lyme replied.

"And he will be keeping a close eye on you, to make sure you are doing as he says. Which means he will be keeping tabs on the trains and hovercrafts going in and out of 12."

"Well, it's a good thing we know of someone who has hovercrafts he can't keep track of," Finnick said, a smirk crossing his handsome face.

* * *

 _ **Whew. A LOT of revelations. Had to go back and change a few things before I posted so I'm sorry about the delay! Hope everyone has a great weekend! :)**_


	38. Chapter 38

_**This chapter isn't super action-packed, but contains some sweet Everlark moments and some close calls. Have a great weekend everyone!**_

 _ **XOXOX**_

* * *

Peeta knocked on the bathroom door for the hundredth time that evening. Sighing, he pressed his ear against the door and listened. He thought he heard water dripping from the faucet but he couldn't be certain. The door was locked, as he had been distraught to discover when they returned to their hotel room. Katniss hadn't said a word the entire ride home and had locked herself in the bathroom as soon as they had gotten inside. Peeta had knocked and pleaded for her to talk to him but she was silent behind the door.

Now, three hours later, he still waited on the other side of the door, his heart sinking lower and lower.

"Katniss, please. I ordered some food for you. Won't you please come out and talk to me?" Silence. He pressed his forehead to the door and shook his head. The avox had brought the food over an hour ago and it was surely cold by now. But he couldn't eat, knowing that she was upset. He knew it was a lot to take in. And he was still angry that everyone seemed to be forcing all of this on her rather than asking her what she wanted. Just because her father had been the leader, they automatically assumed she would take his place. But he knew Katniss well. She didn't like the idea of fighting or war. All she wanted was to keep her family safe. To keep Prim out of harm. Haymitch had guilted her into accepting the position by telling her stories of her father.

"Katniss… love, please talk to me. We're in this together, you know." He tried the door again, as if it would magically unlock for him this time, but it still wouldn't budge. Three hours was too long. He was ready to knock the door down if she didn't open it soon. He knew that wasn't exactly giving her space but after the news of Darius and everything that had happened, his nerves were frayed.

"Katniss… I'm breaking this door if you don't open it." He listened but it was still silent. His forehead thumped against the wood. He really didn't want to break a hotel door but as his brain kept repeating, three hours was too long.

It didn't take much for the door to splinter open and Peeta groaned as he pushed it open. Water filled the bathtub but it was empty. His heart thundered as he turned toward the window, the curtains blowing in the wind. Who the hell had thought a window this big in a bathroom was a good idea, he scoffed to himself. Katniss was perched on the ledge like she was about to take flight. Her knees were drawn to her chest and her head was lowered. She kept turning the mockingjay pin over in her hand. Peeta swallowed as he approached the window.

"Katniss?" She didn't stir but he knew she'd heard him.

"Please," he implored, reaching for her shoulder. She jerked away and he saw her balance was thrown off momentarily. He threw his hands in the air and stammered an apology.

"I'm sorry, just… please come back inside. You are making me so nervous."

"I'm fine," she said stiffly to the night air.

"You may climb trees fairly often but this is a sixty story building. Please come back inside and talk to me." He was more worried about her getting sick; it was still bitterly cold and the wind chill was not helping.

"Just leave me alone, Peeta. Please."

"Katniss, I'm your husband. Not just your friend. I want to help you with this. Just talk-"

"You lied to me," her head shot up and her eyes were rimmed with red. His brow furrowed in confusion and he took a step forward.

"I didn't lie-"

"Why didn't you tell me 13 still exists?" Peeta swallowed and peered out the window.

"I know you're upset, but please, keep your voice down. Let's just… shut the window. And talk inside." He gently tugged her off the ledge and closed the window, a little surprised that she didn't put up a fight. She sank onto the toilet seat and Peeta straightened the curtains before turning back to her.

"I couldn't tell you. I wanted to but I didn't have enough information myself. Haymitch stressed that we had to protect you and he didn't want you to know everything yet. But I don't like keeping secrets from you. I told you what I could."

"You've kept lots of secrets from me," she said quietly. "How could you not tell me about your hijacking? And what happened to Ryen?" He visibly winced and

wrapped his arms around himself.

"Rye and I… we've never talked about… what happened. I didn't even believe Duartyr when he told me. How could I ever be in that sort of state that I would forget my own brother? Rye even told Duartyr not to remind me… to let it fade from my mind. Of course now, years later, I remember it. I remember it happening and I remember actually doing it. His cries of pain, they haunt my dreams. And they're right, Katniss. I really can't be trusted. If I could be turned against my own brother, I could easily be forced to hurt you." Katniss's eyes softened.

"No," she reached out and cupped his chin. "You would never hurt me. I believe that. You're so incredibly strong, Peeta. Just because they were able to get to you before doesn't mean it will happen again. You can fight it. If it comes down to it… just think of my voice, in your head, telling you how wonderful you are. How GOOD you are. Telling you that I lo- ….that you mean the world to me." He glanced up at her, his eyes hazy and sad.

"This is so much more complicated than either of us could have realized. I'm a Peacekeeper Captain and you're the daughter of the late Leader of the Rebellion. You could be the next Mockingjay. We're living on borrowed time here, Katniss."

"We make our own paths, Peeta," she said firmly. "And now that you know we have so many powerful allies, you should know that we won't back down so easily. You're a soldier, yes, but your heart still belongs in 12. With me." She moved her hand down his chest and pressed her palm over his heart. He covered her hand with his and leaned forward to rest his forehead against hers.

"I didn't want you to know what had happened to me. That's why I never told you anything about the… the hijacking," he struggled with the word that referred to his torture. How so much pain could be contained in one word, he didn't know.

"From this moment on, I'll share everything with you. Even if they say it would put you in too much danger… I know how strong you are. You don't need anyone to protect you, you can take care of yourself. Snow will cower once he realizes what a formidable force he is dealing with."

"I'm just one girl, Peeta," she said in a small voice. He smiled and stroked her cheek.

"And your father was just one man. He reached thousands of people, promising change. You can continue his legacy or you can accept the way things are and try to live a quiet life, with your family. With me. It's your choice and no one else's. No one can tell you what to do."

"Come take a bath with me," she stood and tugged on his hand. He frowned at her abrupt change of subject. "I'm going to miss these baths when we get home." He smiled weakly at her reference to his house as 'home'. She knelt to test the water and shivered.

"It's a little cold."

"Yeah, you've been in here for three hours." She bent down to let the cold water out, and ran the hot water again.

"Is that why you decided to break the door?" She raised a brow at the wood splinters littering the floor. "You'll have to pay for that, you know."

"Worth it," he shrugged. "After everything today… I panicked when you were out of my sight. I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry that I hid away from you. I just…"

"I know," he said gently. He pulled his shirt over his head and flung it aside. When his fingers moved to unbutton his slacks, her hand covered his and he froze. She glanced up at him before she moved closer and trailed her lips across his chest. He sucked in a breath as her tongue swirled around his nipple, her fingers working at the button and zipper. She tugged his pants and underwear down around his ankles and stood in front of him. He swallowed heavily, her silver eyes boring into his. She brought his hand to the buttons of her shirt and he took the lead. His hands slid her shirt off her shoulders and he leaned in to kiss her neck as he unclasped her bra. He dropped to his knees so he could pull her pants down her legs and he watched her as he kissed his way back up her legs, around the waistband of her panties. She gripped his shoulders as he pulled those down as well, and tossed them aside. She stepped into the tub and he sat down in front of her, both of them sighing at the warmth. He tilted his head back on her chest and she gently ran her fingers through his curls. She wanted to demand he tell her everything would be ok. She wanted him to promise that they would be safe. She wished she could whisk him and Prim and her mother and the Hawthornes and Rosalie and Sae and so many others to a safe place. A place where Snow couldn't touch them.

But the warm water made her sleepy and the feel of him in her arms made her fall silent. She bent down to kiss his forehead and his blue eyes blinked up at her.

"You're my world, Katniss. Whatever happens, please don't forget that." He reached for her hand under the water and squeezed.

"I don't know what to do, Peeta."

"Listen to your heart and not what all those people are telling you. What does your heart say?"

"I don't know. I haven't really let my heart lead me too much before. I'm too logical." He grinned up at her and shook his head.

"I don't think that's true. You love fiercely, Katniss. Your actions have been lead by love for a long time. Look at everything you have done and risked for Prim, and tell me that's not your heart leading you." She blinked and relaxed against the wall.

"But what will happen if I say no?"

"You can't worry about the rest of the world, my love. You worry about yourself and the ones you love. If you don't want to be their symbol, they can find someone else. You aren't dishonoring your father in any way, so don't start to think that. Every one of those people should have asked you to be their Mockingjay, not told you that's what you're to become. If you wanted to walk away and never attend another meeting, I wouldn't fault you." He pulled her hand from the water and entwined his fingers with hers, studying them closely.

"But," he lowered his voice, "I've always dreamed of a better Panem. I dream of a simple life with you, one with a beautiful little girl that looks just like you. A life filled with laughter and devoid of starvation and pain. If you can give us that, then I think it's worth the risk. But as I said before, I will stand by you, whatever you decide."

"You just confused me even more," she shook her head crossly.

"Sorry. I shouldn't have said anything. It's all up to you, Katniss. You decide what you want to do. Either way, we have to leave 12. Will your mother and sister leave willingly?"

"They will want to know why. I don't know if I'll be able to convince them."

"I don't want to do it but I will order them to leave, if I have to."

"Probably not the best way to make my family like you," she raised a brow. He sat up and turned to face her.

"This is bigger than your family liking me. I want to keep them safe, Katniss. I'll do whatever I have to. Rye even asked me if I would order my own parents to leave but I just don't know if I can do that. That bakery has been my dad's pride and joy since he first inherited it. And it's been in the family for nearly a hundred years. I can't see him doing anything else."

"But if you think your family is safe, why make them leave? Finnick said it was my family that's the concern."

"Snow can use them against you," he nodded. "We just need to make sure that if worst comes to worst, Snow can't use anyone to make you do anything. He is used to getting his way. And he is a strategist. I have a feeling he will try to coax you to his side. But he will use force if he has to."

"If he trusts you as much as you think he does, don't you think he will count on you to get me on his side?"

"Probably. Which might explain why he is being so nice. Trying to give you a chance to see Panem, making sure you get to choose where you want to live. He seemed genuinely concerned for your safety. Maybe Haymitch is right and he knows how valuable you are. I really don't know." She made a sound in her throat and picked up the rag.

"Can I wash you?" His brow quirked in surprise but he nodded and she gently turned him back around. She squirted a fair amount of the smelly body wash into the rag and took a whiff.

"Lavender," she told him as she brought the cloth to his skin. He closed his eyes as she dragged the rag down his back and felt the tension leave his muscles. She tentatively brought the rag to his injured side and inspected the bruise. It surprised her how big of a bruise it was but it was looking better, at least.

"I hate seeing you with marks on your skin," she spoke softly. He glanced over his shoulder, tensing up again.

"I… I had a lot more than this," his voice broke and he cleared his throat. "I'm only telling you this because I agreed not to keep anymore from you. I was really bad off when I came to the Capitol the first time. I had bruises and scars that wouldn't go away. Most of them from Haemon and his soldiers. Even scars that my mother gave me. Duartyr suggested I visit this… facility, in the middle of town. They said they could… well basically, they could polish away all of my scars. So I let them do it. It didn't hurt but it felt so strange when I looked in the mirror afterwards. Like I could still feel them but there was nothing there." He pulled her hand to his forearm.

"This was where Rye pushed me into an oven when I was four. I cried and cried and he felt so bad. Mom's palms were red from spanking him that night. Guess he felt even worse afterwards." He pulled her fingers across his left pectoral.

"They wanted to test my blood when I first arrived to 2. So they used this needle so huge I thought it was a knife. They basically pushed it into my skin, twisted it a few times, and yanked it back out. I have no idea what it was supposed to prove or show, but it hurt like hell. The scar looked like a little star. I didn't hate it. It was… artistic." She bit her lip as he moved her hand across his body, mapping the key moments that he remembered. She was grateful that he was sharing with her but she wanted to cry when he told her about a particularly painful one, especially if it was from his mother. And there were a lot of those.

He trailed her fingers across his neck.

"On one of our assignments, we were supposed to arrest a group of teenagers who kept vandalizing the Justice Building. Duartyr said to rough them up a bit and let them cool down in a cell for a few nights, just to scare them. Their leader took me by surprise and flung this rope around my neck. He nearly strangled me before I was rescued by my cohort. He didn't back down so they shot him. He was still holding the ends of the rope that was wrapped around my throat. Those bruises stayed for nearly a month."

When he turned back around, Katniss ran her fingertips across his muscular back. He shivered and hung his head.

"My back was the worst," he muttered. "You saw how Rye's looked? Haemon beat me for weeks with those same whips. I remember the woman at the facility saying I might still be able to see some of those scars. They were too deep to polish away. I don't know, I can't really see my own back," he shrugged and she leaned closer to inspect his skin. Sure enough, there was the faint outline of something there. So faint that she wouldn't have noticed had he not said anything. But now that she could see them, she was filled with rage. Her blood boiled at the thought of him enduring torment at the hands of his "superiors". He shivered again at the feel of her lips across his skin.

"You said my kisses can heal you," she whispered. "They're gone. Never happened." His shoulders slumped again and he turned around to face her, pulling her in for a kiss.

"If I'm ever their prisoner again," he whispered against her mouth. "I'll just think of this and I'll be fine. Your kisses and your touch will keep me alive."

"Don't say that. Please." He took her face in his hands and pressed their foreheads together.

"We're together," he said firmly. "No one's going to tear us apart." All she wanted at that moment was to be joined with him. She climbed into his lap and nuzzled his neck. His erection throbbed against her core and he groaned. Clutching her back, he stood and stepped out onto the mat. They were both dripping water all over the floor as he carried her into the bedroom and lay her on the bed, quickly rifling through his bag for a condom.

They spent the rest of the night, lost in each other's arms, forgetting about everything but the feel of each other. Every time Katniss started to think of the rebellion, Peeta's lips and hands chased those thoughts away. Was it selfish, locking themselves in this room and ignoring the world's problems? They weren't certain but both of them had been through enough to realize that only few things mattered in the world and cherishing moments was definitely one of them.

* * *

Haymitch banging on the door was not their favorite way to wake up but Peeta pulled some pants on and rushed to let the old Victor in.

"You've got ten minutes, or I'm leaving without you," she heard him bark at Peeta.

"Like you would leave her behind," Peeta scoffed in response.

"Just get dressed. Call the front desk if you need help with bags. And hurry up. I want to get out of the Capitol as soon as possible."

"Alright, alright. Keep your pants on, old man."

"I should be glad that you decided to put some on before answering the door," Haymitch sneered. "Those marks on your neck tell me that you two were quite busy last night."

"We will meet you in the lobby," Peeta said gruffly, pushing Haymitch out the door. He could hear the Victor cackling on the other side.

Peeta rushed through the bedroom to the dresser mirror. He leaned close to examine his reflection and he quirked his brow.

"Tell me, love, do you enjoy marking me as your property?" He saw her blush in the mirror.

"Maybe I got a little carried away."

"Again."

"You weren't exactly complaining," she scowled. He grinned and turned back to face her.

"Why would I complain? I'll gladly wear a tag with your name around my neck, if you prefer."

"We won't go to those extremes. Hand me my, uh... " she cleared her throat and blushed as she reached toward the lamp, where her panties were dangling from the lamp shade. Peeta's grin grew as he hooked them on his finger and draped them in front of her. She snatched them out of the air and hid her face in her hands. He chuckled as he placed his palms on the bed and leaned in to kiss her forehead.

"Let's get dressed so we can go home." Her head shot up.

"Home." She flung the covers back and Peeta tried not to stare at her bare chest. She was unaware of where his thoughts were headed as she pulled on her underwear and grabbed some clothes from her bag.

"Are you all packed," he cleared his throat, his fists clenching and unclenching by his side. He had just spent the whole night inside her. HOW could he be aroused right now?

"Nearly! I was going to bring these bottles of wash back to Prim and Mom, do you think the hotel will notice?"

"No," he smiled as she threw all of the bottles into her bag. "They have tons." He quickly pulled his own clothes on and zipped his bag. He wished they had time to shower but he knew Haymitch was anxious to get back to 12. For however long they would be there. He doubted Snow would give them a whole month, if he was that concerned about Katniss being near 13. The more he thought about it, the more sense it made. He wondered if Minister Antonius knew that 13 was still around. Duartyr wasn't sure if Snow knew but he promised Peeta they would reach out to the President of 13. Peeta didn't know much about Alma Coin but he secretly agreed with Katniss and Johanna. Why would a district hide underground and allow the rest of the country to suffer under the government's hold?

"Ok, I'm ready," she said, pulling him from his thoughts.

"After you," he held the door for her and tried to take her bag over his shoulder but she tugged on it and gave him a look. He held up his hands and gave her a small smile as they adjusted their straps and headed down to the lobby.

Haymitch scowled when they approached.

"About time."

"Nice to see you too, old man," Katniss's scathing tone couldn't be taken seriously with her broad smile. Haymitch rolled his eyes.

"You're too perky this morning. Come on. Car's waiting." They loaded their bags into the car and climbed in. Haymitch took a swig from his flask while Katniss leaned against the window, watching the Capitol rush by.

When they arrived at the train station, Peeta noticed there were quite a few soldiers milling about. He frowned and glanced at Haymitch, whose brows were furrowed.

"Haymitch?"

"Don't talk to anyone and get her onto the train. Head straight for compartment 26. Wait there until I come find you."

"Haymitch, what-"

"I'll take care of the bags." Haymitch jumped out of the car and spoke to the porter. Peeta clutched Katniss's hand and lead her to the train.

"Welcome aboard, sir and miss," the man nodded to them. Peeta nodded and handed him their tickets before gently pushing Katniss onto the train. His hand didn't leave her back until she entered their compartment. He sighed with relief, then sucked in a breath at the sound of his name.

"Captain Mellark." Peeta shot Katniss a look before sliding the door closed. Katniss jumped to her feet and ran to the door, pressing her cheek against the glass.

"General Thread, sir. I wasn't sure when you were returning to 12."

"I was told you and your wife would be going straight to 2."

"That's incorrect, sir. We still have to pack our belongings and Katniss wants to prepare her family for the move. And we are thinking District 8 rather than 2."

"8? Are you mad? Nothing there but clothing and factories. Why would you live there?"

"It's just a thought, General. We haven't decided on anything."

"I see. Well come with me to my compartment, Captain. I'm in need of your assistance with something."

"Forgive me, General, but my wife has been feeling ill this morning and I really don't want to leave her side."

"Admirable, Captain. But orders are orders. Come with me." Katniss chewed on her lip, waiting for Peeta's reply.

"Yes sir. Let me just tell her I'll return to her in a moment." She jumped back as he slid the door open and closed it behind him. She shook her head as he took her face in his hands.

"I'll be alright," he whispered.

"Please don't go."

"I don't have a choice, love. I'll be right back."

"You don't know that! This could be like Darius! Make up some excuse!"

"I already did and he shot me down. I have to go with him, Katniss. Stay in here until Haymitch arrives." He cupped her chin and kissed her softly. "We're still on the train. What can he do to me while we are on here?" He gave her a smile as he backed out of the compartment, closing it tightly.

"Alright General. Lead the way."

"Oh, Victor Abernathy."

"General Thread. Captain Mellark. The conductor says we are leaving the station in the next five minutes. I hate to be leaving such fine food behind, don't you?"

"I didn't think you were a fan of the Capitol, Abernathy," Thread sneered.

"Oh on the contrary, sir, I always love President Snow's invitations. Gets me away from boring old 12 for awhile, am I right?"

"Indeed. If you'll excuse us, Abernathy."

"Oh I had hoped to have a word with Captain Mellark, sir, if that's alright with you."

"Concerning what?"

"Well surely you know, General, that President Snow has extended an invitation to Mrs. Mellark to join the next Victory Tour. Captain Mellark here will be accompanying her and President Snow has invited me along as well. I just need to discuss details with the Captain. Instructions from President Snow, of course.

You understand."

"Very well," Thread sounded angry. "Mellark, I will meet with you when we go back to work. Tomorrow morning, your office."

"Of course, General." Thread stomped away and Peeta slumped against the compartment door.

"Where's your wife?"

"Inside." Peeta slid the door open and allowed Haymitch to pass. He closed the door behind them and exhaled.

"Why is Thread trying to separate us," he said immediately.

"I'm not so sure if Thread is operating under Snow or someone else right now," Haymitch said worriedly.

"Wait. You think he's following someone else's orders," Katniss asked in horror. "Like who?"

"I'm not sure. But I wanted you to know, we have arranged a meeting when we return to 12."

"A meeting with whom? Darius is dead, Purnia is… let's hope we make it t 12 in time. Rye and Madge are… staying in the Capitol," Peeta paused, uncertain as to what could be said in this compartment. He assumed everywhere would be bugged, so he wouldn't say that Rye and Madge would be heading to 13 this morning. They had agreed before they left the boutique yesterday that it was safer than staying in the Capitol any longer than they had to.

"There are others," Haymitch said carefully. "Others who are interested in woodworking too. So I figured, let's spread the message to whoever is interested." Peeta shook his head. He hated the thought of bringing in more people. Bringing danger to more people. His people.

"I'm going to take a nap," Haymitch grunted and just like that, he went from a trusted member of the rebellion to District 12's old drunk again. Katniss shook her head as he let out a belch and exited the compartment.

"Ugh," Katniss waved her hand in front of her nose.

"I wouldn't mind a nap myself," Peeta said softly, moving toward the bed. "Want to join me?" She nodded and lay down on her side, Peeta settling behind her. His arms moved under her so she was nestled against his chest, his arms locked around her. Despite the fact that she wasn't really tired, his warmth made her eyes flutter closed. The last thought she registered before she fell asleep is how sweet he smelled.

"Cinnamon and dill," she said tiredly, her lips barely moving. Peeta lifted his head off the pillow for a moment, smiled down at her, then fell asleep by her side.


	39. Chapter 39

"Katniss, take your sister outside and play." The little girl blinked at her mother's unusually sharp tone. She grasped Prim's hand and dragged her outside. Prim ran to play with the chickens in the yard, squealing with delight. Katniss smiled but turned back toward the house and crept closer. She could plainly see her mother and father through the window. Her mother looked angry about something, while her father reached for her hands, pleading. Katniss glanced at Prim once more and saw that her sister was happily running through the yard, so she crept closer to the open window.

"-can't believe what a fool you're being, Ash! How could you do this to us? To your daughters?"

"It's because of them that I'm doing this! Violet, please, everything I've done, I have done for those girls."

"Don't you DARE say that. You're going to get yourself killed! And for what? For your daughters?" Katniss gasped and clapped a hand over her mouth, ducking out of

sight.

"You think they will appreciate it when they have no father to come home to? This is all Haymitch's doing, isn't it? I knew he was a bad influence!"

"This has nothing to do with Haymitch. I was the one who asked Haymitch to come to a meeting! Maysilee's death hit him pretty hard."

"It hit all of us pretty hard! But that's the way things are, Ash! The way things have been for many, many years."

"And you just want us to stand back and take it? Watch our daughters put their names in the Reaping Bowl when they're older? If I have a chance to stop that from

happening, I'm going to do whatever I can."

"You're just one man, Ash. What can you possibly do?"

"Whatever I can," Ash Everdeen repeated. "I'm going to take the Capitol down. I love you, Violet, but I have to do this. I'm sick of watching our children starve to death. There isn't enough food, even with the game I bring home from the woods. I'm even thinking of taking Katkin to the woods with me so I can teach her some things."

"You want to teach a ten year old how to hunt?"

"She needs to know how to keep herself alive. You know how she is with nature. She's a little forest sprite. If anything happens to me, she can help you with Primrose. She's a fighter, our little water flower."

"And what about me, Ash? What do you think will happen to me if they catch you?"

"Vi." He reached for her again and pressed his forehead to hers. Katniss watched as her mother slumped forward in her father's arms.

"You mean everything to me," she sobbed. "I can't imagine life without you."

"Nothing will happen," he assured her. "But if it does, I want you to be ready. I want you and Katniss and Primrose to leave 12."

"And go where?"

"Just over the border is-"

"No," her mother said sharply, drawing away from him. "I don't want to hear anymore of your fantasies about destroyed districts. We wouldn't last 2 days out in the wild, Ash. We're not going anywhere."

"Vi, it IS real. And they will welcome you. Please, my love, if something happens to me, I want you to take the girls and run. Haymitch will go with you. He will tell Katniss everything when she's older."

"I'm not going anywhere with Haymitch Abernathy! And I'm not leaving my home. My parents will help, if something… damn it, Ash, stop talking like this! Just say you won't do any more of those recordings. No more meetings. I mean it."

"I'm sorry, Violet. I can't make that promise. My song has set Panem ablaze and I want to see the flames destroy the Capitol."

"Those flames will destroy you and everything you hold dear," she said desperately. "Ash, please. I can't lose you. We can't lose you."

"Katty!" Katniss spun around at the sound of her sister's cry. Prim had fallen, apparently having tripped over a chicken, and was clutching her bleeding knee. She wasn't crying but her face was screwed up in a pout.

"It hurts, Katty." Katniss knelt beside her sister and stroked her hair.

"You'll be ok, Prim. Let's go back inside."

"Here we go, up you get," a deep voice said as she felt both of them being lifted. She blinked up at the man, her father's friend from Victor's Village. He smiled down at them and gestured toward Prim.

"You get her inside to your mama, ok? She can look at that knee." Katniss cocked her head.

"You want to talk to Daddy?"

"I'll see him later. I'm sure he wants to spend some time with his little girls," he smiled and nudged Katniss. "Take care of yourself, sweetheart." She helped Prim hobble up the steps and Katniss looked back at Haymitch one more time. He smiled and waved before he headed toward the path out of the Seam. She stuffed her hand in her pocket and gasped as she found two peppermints. She looked back at Haymitch but he was gone. He had been sneaking her mints since she was 5. She stuffed one into her mouth, then handed the other to Prim, who squealed and forgot all about her injured knee. When the front door opened, their parents flew to their sides, their argument all but forgotten.

* * *

"Daddy. Daddy!" Katniss kicked and Peeta gasped as he caught her foot in his shin. Wincing, he sat up and peered blearily at the sleeping girl beside him. She writhed and tossed her head and he hastily patted her cheek.

"Hey, Katniss. You're ok. Wake up. It's just a dream." She gasped for breath as her eyes shot open. She sat straight up, nearly knocking him in the chin.

"It's ok," he said hurriedly, reaching for her. "You're on the train with me."

"But… my dad was just here!" Peeta's brow furrowed.

"No love. You were dreaming."

"He was right here! He was talking to my mother and Haymitch… Haymitch snuck me a sweet."

"Haymitch sneaking sweets? Now I know you're dreaming."

"Peeta, I saw him!"

"Ok, ok. I believe you. What did he say?" Her face screwed up in concentration.

"I don't remember. But my mom was upset. I was really young. Dad was… she was asking him not to do something. And Dad was telling her to… leave 12." Peeta's eyes widened.

"It was just a dream, Katniss. Come on. Let's go find something to eat. We still have awhile before we're back in 12." Katniss frowned as he dragged her from the compartment, ignoring her growling stomach.

* * *

They found Haymitch in the dining car, with a glass of dark liquid in his hand. Peeta rolled his eyes as he moved toward the buffet table but Katniss plopped into a seat in front of the Victor. Haymitch blinked in surprise then drained his glass.

"We need to talk."

"Give me a chance to wake up, sweetheart. I've only had one glass and I need at least two more before I deal with your yammering."

"You weren't this mean to me when I was young." She could tell she had surprised him. She nodded and leaned back in her chair.

"You even snuck me peppermints when my mother wasn't looking." He tapped the glass with a long finger.

"Huh. Don't remember that."

"Yes you do," she shot to her feet as he rose from his chair. "You were my father's best friend. You kept an eye on Prim and me. And my mom didn't like you."

"Not many people liked me, sweetheart," he scoffed.

"But she thought you were a bad influence on him. That you were the reason he was doing… what he did."

"Train's stopping to refuel. Let's take a walk." Katniss glanced back at Peeta and nodded, letting him know she was ok. He gripped his plate but watched her step off the train behind Haymitch without a word.

* * *

Haymitch kicked the pebbles as they walked, his hands shoved into his pockets.

"Where did all of this come from?"

"I don't know. I had a dream… about him. I don't remember all of it but mom was upset. I was supposed to take Prim outside to play and I listened at the window. And I think it really happened. Mom asked him to stop and he told her he couldn't. She said he would get himself killed." Haymitch sighed.

"Ash hated keeping anything from Violet. Much like Peeta has trouble keeping secrets from you. But when he finally told her, she was furious. Said he was an idiot and nothing would come from it. He showed her a few of his recordings and it just made her more angry. Violet left everything behind to be with your dad. I think it scared her more than anything that she would be left with nothing, if something happened to him."

"She loved him," Katniss said fiercely.

"Yeah, she did. And he loved her. But he also loved his country. His district. He wanted to make a difference and he knew how dangerous it was." Katniss crossed her arms and kicked at a flower. Too late, she noticed it was a dandelion and felt a tug in her heart. She scowled at the weed and turned back to Haymitch.

"Did Dad ever mention anything about us leaving 12?" He raised a brow.

"Why do you ask?"

"I think he wanted her to take us… to 13. I remember something about it in my dream." Haymitch cleared his throat.

"I don't want to speak badly of your mother, Katniss. Ash loved her something fierce and believed she would stand by him in the rebellion. But that woman failed you.

I don't think Ash ever imagined that she would just… die inside and leave her girls to starve. I get that the grief hit her hard but she still had daughters to take care of and she didn't. To top it off, she didn't do as Ash asked. He wanted you all to be safe and asked for me to take the three of you to 13 if anything happened to him."

"So why didn't you?"

"You know what your mother was like after he died. I couldn't reach her. No one could. I even thought about taking you girls myself but call me a coward, I didn't want to be accused of kidnapping. And we weren't anywhere near ready to come forward about the rebellion. Taking you and Prim away from 12 would have alerted the Capitol and they would have known something was happening. They would have retaliated and maybe even burned 12 to the ground, like they tried to do to 13. I went over and talked to Violet many times but she never heard me. After she started to get better, I tried again. Said it was what Ash wanted and she yelled at me that it was my fault he's dead. Said I wouldn't go near her girls. So I kept my distance. Watched you hunt and keep your family alive. When 13 came forward and proposed an alliance, I knew it was time to tell you. I waited, though, and watched things get worse in 12. Peacekeepers came and went and then the whole thing with Cray and… Darius blamed himself. He said he was the one who convinced you to go through with the contract. And he was only saying that because he knew Peeta would be back in 12. When we heard that Cray had you, we tried to come up with a plan. Luckily the Mellarks had us covered but we didn't know that at first. Darius felt awful."

"Prim was the reason I went through with it," she said stiffly.

"I know that. But Darius just wanted you to realize it wouldn't be a bad thing. He loved Rosalie, and he knew Peeta had fallen for you years ago. When Darius toasted with Rosalie, they burned the contract too. They'd already agreed it was a lifetime commitment, not some Capitol-created ploy. I guess Thread told Snow about your contract, the papers being kept at the Justice Building and all that. That's why Snow asked Peeta if it was real or not." Katniss chewed on her lip, thinking about the contract. What would Peeta say if she suggested they burn it? She could see how much it hurt him when she brought it up. With that piece of paper out of the way, maybe she could finally tell him that she loved him. That it was real to her.

Her eyes met Haymitch's and it dawned on her how similar they were to her father's.

"You'll come with us? To 13?"

"I promised Ash I would look after his girls," he said softly. "I've done a lousy job, but I'll be by your side in 13. I'll help you become the Mockingjay, if that's what you choose."

"And what if it's not?"

"Everyone has a choice, Katniss. Even you. I realized that after you and Peeta left yesterday. We can't force you to do this. No one can. It has to be your choice and yours alone. But just know that your father was determined to make a difference for Panem. You could make a difference. With your help, we could actually overthrow the Snows and take back to the Capitol. Actually give the people the power, instead of one family and their sick followers. Unite Panem into one country, instead of just 13 districts."

"I just don't know, Haymitch. How am I supposed to do all of that by myself?"

"You're not by yourself. You have me, and a husband who would do anything for you. You have a sister who worships you and friends who would fight by your side. And you have a country of people who remember the Mockingjay, who remember the little girl who sang by his side." Her eyes widened and he nodded.

"We recorded quite a few of Ash and you singing together. You didn't know what you were singing, I don't think, but it touched people. Violet was livid when she found out we were using you for the videos. Peeta asked how everyone knows who you are. The country has seen you, Katniss. If they see what you have become, it might be enough to stir them into a frenzy and make them fight."

"First we have to convince Mom and Prim to come with us to 13. And after what you've just said, I don't know how easy it will be to get Mom to leave 12."

"You're not a little girl anymore, Katniss. If it comes down to it, you can take Prim to 13 yourself and leave Violet behind. I know that's not what you want but if Violet sacrifices all we have worked for-"

"You'll sacrifice her," Katniss said coldly. "We aren't sacrificing anyone, Haymitch. Not even my mother. So forget it." He nodded, clenching his jaw.

"I'll get them to leave. Snow said we have a month to get everything in order."

"We need to leave as soon as we're able. Once we're gone from 12 and off his radar, Snow will start to look for you. And he will know that you're a part of the rebellion. He will come after you in whatever way he can."

"So we can't leave anyone behind! We have to take them all with us! The Hawthornes, the Mellarks, Sae, the Undersees-"

"We can't take that many people with us," he said gently. "Not yet. It would look too suspicious, if everyone started to disappear. Travel from district to district is banned, except in special circumstances. You know that."

"We can't just leave them behind! If you want me to try to save Panem, I'm going to start with my own district first!"

"I understand, Katniss. Let's just figure out how to leave 12 undetected. And work on getting your mother and sister to come with us without a fight."

"Haymitch… how is all of this going to affect Peeta? He's a Captain now, I mean, he will be in direct contact with Snow. And they're going to be watching him closely."

"Peeta will be fine. Once he gets to 13, he can get rid of the title, if he wants. He'll be by your side so I don't imagine he will much care whether he is a peacekeeper anymore or not. Felix already said if he makes it to 13, he will deny ever being a peacekeeper. Lyme wants him to stay in 2 and keep close to Snow as long as he can. We talked about having Peeta do the same. But," he held up his hand, seeing her about to protest. "We decided it would be better to keep the two of you together. You're obviously stronger together than apart. Snow knows this, which is why he is telling Peeta to take you away. Coin wants us to move fast, though, so let's get back to 12, start packing, and decide on a game plan. Ok?" Katniss nodded and he patted her shoulder.

"I believe in you, Katniss. Cinna's name for you isn't a mistake. I think you're gunna be a girl on fire indeed."

* * *

She followed him back to the train and was not surprised that Peeta was waiting for them just inside. She squeezed his hand to assure him everything was fine and he held up a plate.

"Thought you might be hungry." Her stomach growled and he raised a brow with a smile.

"Thank you," she took the plate and Haymitch grunted.

"Think I'll take my refreshments to my room."

"You don't have any… Haymitch, you should eat something," Peeta called after him. Katniss smiled as he rolled his eyes.

"You want to eat in the dining car or our compartment?"

"Let's go sit on our bed. It's more comfortable." He nodded and held both plates so Katniss could slide their compartment door open.

Peeta wanted to ask Katniss what had happened with Haymitch but he knew they had to keep their conversation limited.

"Did you enjoy your walk?"

"Mm. Yeah, Haymitch and I talked about the Victory Tour and how long it would be. He thinks I'll really like living in 2. Though I was thinking 4 could be nice too." Peeta tried to find any underlying meaning in her words but couldn't. He took a bite of his roll and nodded.

"I've heard 4 is beautiful. Finnick invited us to visit sometime. Apparently people live right on the ocean. No mountains in sight but water that goes on for miles and

miles."

"You can't swim," she teased him. "Do you think it's a good idea for you to live near the ocean?"

"You can teach me," he said gently.

"Where would you like to live, Peeta?" He reached down and wrapped his fingers around hers.

"As long as you're there, I really don't care what district I'm in. Home is with you." She wanted to cry at how easy it seemed, for him to love her. How beautiful words were when they slipped from his silver tongue. She opened her mouth, willing the words to come, but an image suddenly overtook her mind and fear choked her completely.

 _"Have a good day little Katkin. I love you!"_  
 _"I love you, Daddy!"_

S _moke filled the air, choking the citizens of District 12. Miners stood around, silent tears streaming down their faces as they waited for news._

 _An older Peacekeeper pulled Katniss out of class. What had she done wrong?_

 _Her father was dead. There was an accident. Many miners were dead._

 _She needed to tell her sister herself._

 _Did her mother even know?_

 _The Peacekeeper had cold eyes and an even colder touch as he patted her shoulder and walked away._

 _Daddy. The strongest man she knew. Dead._

 _She couldn't believe it._

Katniss choked back a sob and her eyes shot open to find a very concerned Peeta in front of her.

"Are you alright?" She nodded but couldn't speak. His hands went to her face and he leaned close.

"Katniss, what is it?"

"I keep seeing… I just… so many faces and voices. Everywhere." He pulled her in his arms and rubbed her back soothingly.

"I'm here," he kept saying. But it only reminded her of moments when she used to climb into her father's lap and he would hold her close, whispering in her ear that he was there and he wouldn't ever leave her.

People leave. Her father, her mother, and one day, Peeta would leave too.

She bit back the words that she wanted to say, that had very nearly come out, and she leaned back to rub at her face.

"Do you have to go back to work as soon as we get back?" Peeta's brow quirked at her oddly abrupt shift in conversation.

"I'll go in tomorrow morning. And then the woodworking meeting tomorrow night."

"Maybe I'll have Prim over while you're at work so she can help me pack our things."

"The good thing is I just moved back to 12. So my things are still in boxes. I don't really have that much anyway."

"That will make the move easier," she shrugged. "Once we decide where we are going."

"Maybe we can talk to Mayor Undersee," he said softly. "He has been to multiple districts. See where is his favorite."

"Well wherever we live, I hope there is cheese to make cheesebuns." She held up a dry roll and wrinkled her nose. Peeta chuckled and cupped her chin.

"Doesn't matter which district we are in, Katniss, I will keep you well supplied with cheesebuns."

* * *

It was late when they pulled in to the station. Haymitch kept close to Peeta and Katniss as they collected their bags.

"Captain Mellark, I would appreciate a Peacekeeper escort to my house." Peeta looked surprised but nodded slowly.

"Of course, Victor Abernathy."

"Captain Mellark," a smooth female voice came from behind him. Peeta let out a relieved sigh when Purnia saluted him.

"Good evening, Purnia. Thanks for being here to greet us."

"Of course, Captain. Burns and Pickens are on duty as well. We will escort you and your wife to your house, sir."

"Purnia, you can escort Victor Abernathy to Victor's Village," Peeta said quickly. "Burns and Pickens can come to the Peacekeepers Barracks with Katniss and me."

"As you wish, Captain."

"Grab a bag, Purnia," Haymitch tossed the Peacekeeper his duffel bag, and she scowled.

"Mister Abernathy, isn't this a bit much for a few days in the Capitol?"

"When you're a Victor, sweetheart, there's no such thing as too much. See you tomorrow, Captain!" Purnia raised a brow at Peeta as she turned and followed the Victor to his home. The other two Peacekeepers seemed rather flustered around Peeta, even bowing instead of saluting.

"Pickens," he said gently. "We went through training in 2 together! I'm still the same Peeta."

"Lieutenant is one thing, sir, but Captain… that's another altogether." Peeta looked slightly uncomfortable as he helped the soldiers with their bags and started off towards home.

* * *

As soon as they were inside, Peeta locked the door tightly and set the bags down. Katniss yawned and stretched but Peeta looked wide awake.

"How about a shower before bed?" Without waiting for an answer, he dragged her upstairs and into the bathroom. He quickly turned the hot water on and turned back to her.

"Sorry. Until we can check the house to make sure…"

"I understand. So Purnia is ok."

"It would seem so. Although I'm sure Haymitch will think of an excuse to make her stay near him, until we can be sure she is safe."

"I wonder if she knows about Darius." Peeta winced.

"I want to ask around about Rosalie. If Purnia saw them both before we left 12, then something had to have happened to her in the Capitol. And I'll tell Duartyr he needs to find her."

"What kind of man harms a pregnant woman?"

"What kind of man slaughters children on live television," he fired back bitterly. Katniss's brow raised in surprise but she nodded. Peeta ran his fingers through his hair and sighed.

"I didn't really mean we had to… I mean, I brought us in here so we can talk. If you'd like to shower first, I can just-"

"Peeta," she rolled her eyes impatiently. "Are you going to act like nothing happened between us in the Capitol?" He looked uncertain.

"I didn't know if…I mean, so much happened in such a short time. It's all sort of like a whirlwind dream. I wasn't sure if… maybe you'd want to forget it happened."

"Of course I don't want to forget," she said crossly. "And I'm a little offended you think I would." He looked abashed and rubbed the back of his neck anxiously.

""Please don't think I'm underestimating you. I'm actually underestimating myself. I still have to pinch myself when you're here in front of me, telling me you want to be with me. It's unreal."

"No," she moved closer, so their faces were inches from each other. She reached out and slid her hands under his shirt, making him gulp audibly.

"It's real," she whispered before sliding the shirt over his head.

They held each other under the stream of hot water, Peeta's hands resting just under her breasts. She could feel his want for her but neither of them moved to do anything about it. She let him hold her, their minds and hearts racing and trying to enjoy the simple moment while wondering what the days would bring.

* * *

 _ **It's a short one but I wanted to post before Christmas! Hope everyone has a wonderful holiday! XOXOX**_


	40. Chapter 40

Katniss slept peacefully while Peeta quietly changed into his uniform. He held his helmet under his arm as he leaned over to kiss her awake. Her eyes fluttered open and widened as she jerked back into the pillow. Peeta bit his lip and jumped to his feet, apologizing profusely.

"It's just me, love, I'm sorry! I didn't even think- I'm sorry."

"It's ok, Peeta," she rubbed her chest and shook her head. "You just startled me. I guess you're going to work now."

"I'll be off this afternoon and we can have dinner before we attend the… woodworking meeting together," he cleared his throat and wrapped his fingers around hers.

"Are you going over to your mother's?"

"Probably. I might bring Prim back here with me. Or out to the meadow so we can talk."

"Be safe," he stroked her cheek with his knuckles.

"I will. I'll see you later." She leaned up to kiss him and his eyes slammed shut as he became lost in her kisses. Too soon for his liking, she was pulling away and he sighed as he slipped the helmet over his head. Katniss's smile fell and her eyes lowered to the blankets.

"I love you," he said, though it was muffled by his uniform.

As he closed the door behind him, he pocketed his gun and stared down at his uniform. He wondered if he would still be expected to wear this now that he was Captain. Duartyr didn't really wear a uniform and he knew some higher up soldiers never wore theirs. He couldn't help but notice how heavy it felt today. Like the uniform itself was trying to weigh him down and defeat him.

"I'm married to the Daughter of the Mockingjay," he muttered to himself. "And she will take this country by storm or fire."

* * *

Peeta froze when he saw how many Peacekeepers were crowding the streets in town. He was certain there hadn't been this many soldiers in 12 when he had left it. He clenched his jaw as he made his way to the Justice Building, ignoring how his new soldiers were harassing his citizens. He couldn't intervene and call attention to himself. Haymitch and Duartyr had both warned him to keep a low profile and pretend to agree with Snow's actions against the district. Unfortunately that meant he had to turn a blind eye to the men knocking old women down and kicking children as they rushed past.

Peeta's lip was bleeding by the time he entered his office. He had to hold back his angry words so many times that morning that his jaw ached from clenching so tightly. He rubbed at his face as he closed his office door and released a deep sigh. He was about to cross to his desk when he heard a sharp knock. It was two Capitol Peacekeepers on the other side and even though they showed Peeta the respect that was demanded, he could tell they still thought themselves superior to him.

"Captain Mellark, sir. General Thread is requesting to see you in his office."

"Right. Thank you, soldiers." He followed them across the hall and he shot them a look before he knocked on the door.

"Enter." Peeta shut the door before the two men could follow him in and he turned to face his General. Thread still wore the Peacekeeper uniform. The pristine white was already stained with blood this morning. Peeta felt sick and his eyes drifted to Thread's cold ones.

"You wanted to see me, General?"

"Yes Captain. As I understand it, your brother has elected to remain in the Capitol for some time with his young wife. The President will allow this as a favor to the Mayor, but he expects your brother to return to his work after the weekend is over. I trust you will deliver the message to him."

"Of course, General."

"Now the President has asked that you choose your Lieutenant today. It seems that you had a Peacekeeper in mind, though I was not aware of this. Who are you considering?" Peeta swallowed, his heart aching for Darius and his missing wife. He silently apologized to his poor friend as he shook his head.

"I hadn't really thought about it, General, to be completely honest with you. I assumed you would assist me in appointing someone upon our return."

"Well that's good," Thread's eyes gleamed, which disturbed Peeta. "I have several options in mind. Shall I call them in?"

"Yes sir, that would be fine."

* * *

The four men Thread had chosen were Capitol-born and clearly as ruthless as the General was. Peeta shuddered to think of any of these men being in charge of his home. How could he in good conscious leave his people behind to suffer at the hands of these men? It bothered him that everyone wanted him and Katniss to hurry to District 13 and leave everyone else behind. Wasn't it clear that Snow would retaliate if Katniss went missing? He had no doubts Snow wouldn't hesitate to burn 12 to the ground.

Play along, Duartyr had told him. Just long enough to get Katniss to 13 safely and then the rebellion can truly be launched.

Peeta ran his fingers through his hair and repositioned the helmet under his arm.

"Soldier, ah, Nezza?"

"Nerezza, Captain," the man hissed.

"My apologies. Nerezza. You carry no gun or blade, that I can see. What is your weapon of preference?" Nerezza's eyes, which were a dark shade of brown, very nearly black, seemed to glisten. He removed the gun strap from his chest and flipped it over. Peeta moved closer and could see a dozen small darts attached to the strap.

"It was a preferred weapon in ancient Rome," the soldier said, baring his teeth in what Peeta supposed was a smile. "These little beauties are dipped in poison. They can move almost as fast as an arrow."

"Nerezza does like his plumbatae," Thread said fondly. Peeta's brow furrowed at the foreign word.

"My name literally means darkness, General," Nerezza said, his eyes like black pools of nothingness. "That's what wrong-doers meet when they cross me and my darts."

"The other three prefer to use guns. Although Cadmar here prides himself on being able to cleave flesh from bone with every swing of his whip."

"I hear we have that in common, Captain Mellark," the one called Cadmar said with a cruel smile. "Surprising that someone born in District 12 would have such a skillset."

"I am not your average District citizen," Peeta said in a low voice. "Do not underestimate me, soldier." The four Peacekeepers looked surprised while Thread looked

pleased. The General folded his hands and rested his elbows on the desk.

"Thank you, soldiers. Please see yourselves out." The soldiers saluted Thread and Peeta and Nerezza shot Peeta a worried look over his shoulder. When the door closed, Thread gestured for Peeta to sit.

"What do you think, Captain?"

"They're undisciplined, General. Sloppy, even. Poisoned arrows? That's risky. And they clearly do not take well to authority. Who did they operate under in the Capitol?"

"Senator Snow," Thread said with somewhat of a smirk. Peeta's brow furrowed even further.

"Then I would expect more respect with their station. Since the moment I stepped foot in District 2, I have been questioned and doubted. I believe I have proved my loyalty to the Capitol time and time again, but what would you have me do to convince these Capitol men that my loyalties lie with President Snow?"

"Perhaps District 12 needs to be shaken up a bit," Thread said slowly. "People need to fear the Capitol again. There's been too much talk of rebellion over the years. We need to stamp that out. Make them realize they are lost without the Capitol. Like the assignment you took in District 11. These people need to be made examples of. It's District 12's turn."

"Fear is already rampant in this district, General. What you're speaking of would take away the necessary labor needed to keep the mines running. The mines keep the district running, and the coal is transported to the Capitol. Punish the men who work underground and we will have no one to mine for coal."

"I shouldn't be surprised that you defend these filthy coal miners."

"It's not about defense, General, it's about thinking smart. If you insist on making an example out of 12, we take away what little they have. Stricter curfews. Double the amount of floggings. Put them on TV, broadcast them live. Sow fear, General, more fear." Thread leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. His expression was unreadable, his posture stiff and unyielding.

"Brilliant, Captain. I believe the President made a wise decision in promoting you. You are not as soft as you seem. They told me you were just a baker's son before I met you."

"Colonel Haemon made sure of that, General. I haven't been the baker's son I once was in a very long time."

"Well then," Thread stood and crossed to shake Peeta's hand. "Once we choose a Lieutenant, we will begin to cleanse this district of the filth that has rooted here. In the meantime, I want you to check on the improvements being made in the town center. Inform me if anything needs to be seen to."

"Yes sir." Peeta saluted the General and hurried back to his office. Once inside, he tossed his helmet onto the desk and collapsed against the door, hiding his face in his hands and resisting the urge to scream. He felt his stomach roiling at the thought of his people in such turmoil. His neighbors. Friends. People he had grown up with. His father's customers. People who had worked with Katniss's father. People he had attended school with.

He was the enemy, he reminded himself. Until they could leave, he was the enemy and he needed to play the part to keep Katniss safe. It always came down to Katniss.

Taking several steadying breaths, he stood and ran a hand through his hair. He put on a neutral face and yanked the door open, making the woman on the other side yelp in surprise.

"Miss Carter! I'm sorry I startled you. What can I do for you?" His secretary was holding a large box and it shook in her hands.

"I'm sorry to disturb you, Captain Mellark. These are census records dating almost twenty years ago. General Thread said I need to start cleaning out the Justice Building but I didn't know what needed to be done with the records."

"I'll take them. Thank you, Miss Carter." He took the box from her and she nodded.

"There are two more, Captain. If you would like for me to bring them to you."

"I'll collect them from the Archives," he said kindly. He followed her down the hall and slipped into the Archives room, picking up the two boxes she pointed out.

"This is all of the records?"

"Yes sir. These are the only boxes that were never filed."

"I'll keep them in my office until we can decide what to do with them. Thank you, Miss Carter." She nodded nervously and sat behind her desk while he carried the boxes to his office. He set them against the wall behind his desk and nudged one with his foot.

"Census records," he muttered to himself. He would check on whatever it was Thread was referring to in the square and then he would return to rifle through these boxes.

* * *

Peeta was glad that his helmet hid his identity. He didn't want his neighbors to stare at him with hatred in their eyes as they were doing with every Peacekeeper. He shouldered his rifle and nodded to his soldiers as he passed. The medals he wore made his uniform even heavier but it signified his rank and station, so he would keep them on.

He rounded the corner and felt like he might throw up in his helmet. Dozens more whipping posts and gallows had been built, while large cages hung overhead. Peeta's knees nearly gave out as he moved closer and saw two small children in the cage. Their faces were pressed to the cage wall as they cried and pleaded for their mother. Peeta stomped up to the Peacekeeper who was laughing in the corner.

"What is the meaning of this, Soldier?"

"They broke the law, Captain."

"What law did two children break?"

"They stole from a market stall. I saw them run right past with the stolen fruit. I was told to lock them in the cage, sir, until they could be put on trial."

"Trial?!" If Thread was putting children on trial for theft, they were in more trouble than he thought. The soldier lowered his gun and bowed his head.

"Just give me your orders, Captain, and I'll carry them out. I swears."

"Release these children, soldier. Escort them to their homes and make their mothers pay for the fruit. If they can't pay, you will arrest the oldest sibling. These children are too young to be arrested. They can't do much with those scrawny muscles."

"Yes Captain Mellark." Peeta watched as the soldier lowered the cage and opened the door, yanking on the children's chains. He swallowed and closed his eyes, willing himself away from there. Anywhere with Katniss was fine with him. He couldn't believe what he was being made to do. And he had a feeling it would only get worse.

* * *

After he made the rounds in the square, he decided he needed to have a word with Haymitch and he headed toward Victor's Village. The only house that was occupied was Haymitch's and it didn't even look lived in. It was about as broken down as the rest of the houses.

He stomped up the porch and knocked sharply at the door, waiting impatiently for someone to answer. He didn't think Haymitch had any help around the house but a young woman pulled the door open.

"Captain."

"Purnia?" She beckoned him in and closed the door tightly. She put a finger to her lips and lead him through the house to the kitchen and down to the basement. Haymitch was speaking into a device, slamming his palm against the table.

"That's not good enough! We need to get to 13 as soon as possible. Why is she saying we need to wait three weeks?" He glanced up at Peeta and Purnia and nodded.

"Well tell your president that things are getting worse in 12. And they will continue to get worse. She promised that your district would liberate 12 first. The Mockingjay isn't going to cooperate if her district is in danger." Peeta turned to Purnia but she put a finger to her lips again and shook her head.

"Fine. I will tell everyone to be ready. A lot can happen in three weeks, Boggs. Alright alright. I'll tell them. Yeah, ok bye." Haymitch slammed the device down and rolled his eyes.

"Three goddamn weeks until they send a hovercraft to get us out of here."

"You were speaking with 13?"

"Yeah. Boggs is the Colonel and is Coin's second-in-command. He is saying they can't manage a good distraction right now and wants us fully prepared to run like crazy if we have to."

"They're afraid that Snow will bomb 12," Peeta said slowly.

"Well he didn't say that but yeah, I figure that's what he's thinking. Since his district has been through it before and all."

"Except 13 can survive underground. 12 can't. It will completely decimate our population."

"Facts I'm well aware of kid. Purnia, how about you make us some tea?"

"Just because you're keeping me here, Haymitch, doesn't make me your servant."

"Make some for yourself then. Will it help if I say please?" Purnia rolled her eyes but stomped up the stairs. They could hear her moving around the kitchen and slamming things on the counter. Peeta raised a brow toward the ceiling and Haymitch shrugged.

"Lyme says that even though Purnia is from District 1, she's in danger. The Capitol targeted Darius. No reason to think they won't do the same thing to her. Rye is out of danger for now so I'm keeping Purnia here until we can be sure they're not after her."

"And how long do you think she'll stay here, Haymitch? How long will it take for us to discover if Snow is after her or not?"

"That's another thing, kid. A lot of this doesn't make sense. Thread is acting like he is reporting to someone else. The Snows seemed divided while we were there, what with their separate parties and such. And Snow said he would give you and Katniss a month to move but Thread thought you were going directly to 2."

"So what are you saying?"

"I'm just saying it doesn't add up. Something else may be going on. I just don't know what."

"Well Purnia is a soldier of Panem. Thread will be looking for her soon. You can't keep her locked up here."

"Then we send her on to 13, like we did with Rye." Peeta shook his head in disbelief.

"You think she'll go for that?"

"She's been a part of the rebellion for years, Peeta. She knows a lot. And she knows what's at stake. I'm sure she wants to live. Yeah, I think she'll go."

"There's something else you should know." Peeta quickly told Haymitch what he had seen in town and what he had told Thread. Haymitch rose and patted Peeta's shoulder gingerly.

"I know it's not easy Peeta, but you're doing the right thing."

"Doesn't rebellion mean standing up to protect your people? I'm throwing them to the wolves right now."

"Rebellion means nothing if we don't have a compelling voice to speak out. And that's our Mockingjay. But we have to get her to safety and that's not here. We can't launch the rebellion until we are out of 12. You know that."

"I know that. I don't have to like it though." Haymitch nodded in understanding.

"How's Katniss?"

"If you're asking me if she's agreed to be your Mockingjay, I don't know. We didn't talk about it last night. And I had to leave early this morning."

"She's not just our Mockingjay, Peeta, she's Panem's Mockingjay."

"Except that the previous Mockingjay was murdered in his own district. Why are you in such a hurry to put her in danger?"

"She's the only one who can do this, Peeta," Haymitch pressed on. "You have to help her. You have to show her how much we stand to gain by winning this war."

"War," Peeta shook his head. "Peacekeepers are trained to be soldiers. We're trained to fight and defend. But I never thought I would see an actual war."

"It's how things change, kid," Haymitch said gently. "We have been silent for too many years. I'm not going to promise that bad things won't happen. Maysilee tried to make me promise her that we would be alright, the night before we went into the arena. I told her I couldn't make that promise. As she died in my arms, she said you can't protect anyone in an arena. And she was right." Peeta didn't altogether understand what Haymitch was talking about but the faraway look in his hazy eyes was somewhat disturbing.

"I need to get back to the Justice Building. I'll see you at tonight's meeting."

"It will be right here," Haymitch waved around the basement. "And I'm hoping that President Coin will make a speech on the holo so people can hear what she has to say."

"Alright. See you tonight." Peeta made his way back upstairs and nodded to Purnia, who was pouring the tea.

"See you tonight," he muttered as he exited the house.

* * *

He considered stopping into the bakery to see his father but he had a feeling Thread would be looking for him, so he made his way back to the Justice Building. His secretary was positively shaking when he entered and he cast her a puzzled look before continuing to his office. Two Peacekeepers stood guard outside his door and he frowned, reaching into his pocket for his pistol.

"Is there something wrong, soldiers?"

"A prisoner was brought in a few moments ago, Captain. General Thread said to chain her in your office and await your sentencing."

"My sentencing? What are the charges?"

"Poaching, Captain Mellark. On Capitol land." Peeta's heart started to race.

"Was he arrested with any evidence of poaching?"

"She was, Captain. A rabbit."

"I see. And General Thread is waiting for me to sentence her?"

"Yes sir. General Thread is gone for the day. He said to keep her in a cell overnight, and said you may carry out the sentence in the morning. Flogging or firing squad."

"Firing squad seems extreme for a poaching incident. As does flogging. Let me into my office so I can speak to the accused." The two Peacekeepers stepped aside and Peeta pushed the door open. It was a good thing he was gripping the handle, else he would have passed out in the floor. The young woman who was chained to his desk flipped her dark braid and gazed up at him with hopelessness in her grey eyes.

* * *

 _ **Happy new year! Don't hate me for this chapter- everything will be explained very soon! XOXOX**_


	41. Chapter 41

Peeta slammed the door behind him and crossed the room in two steps. His hands hovered awkwardly over her, wanting to rid her of the heavy chains.

"What the hell is going on?" When she didn't answer, he knelt in front of her and cupped her chin.

"Talk to me."

"What do you want me to say," she said dully.

"Tell me why you were arrested for poaching. That can't be true, can it? After everything I told you. After everything we have talked about? Tell me they're lying." She didn't speak and she refused to look at him.

"Damn it, Katniss, look at me!" She blinked back tears and her eyes moved to his.

"What happened," he asked urgently.

"I couldn't let them take Prim," she whispered before bowing her head and pressing her forehead to the desk.

"Prim? What does Prim have to… ok… ok, let me think." Peeta stood and rubbed his forehead. His wife looked vastly uncomfortable and he dug into his pocket for spare keys. He shoved them into the lock and she leaned back in her chair, rubbing her wrists.

"Katniss, you have to tell me the truth. Tell me what happened. Exactly how it happened." Katniss opened her mouth to speak but the door opened and Peeta jumped to his feet.

"Captain Mellark, sir. There's a young woman here to-"

"Peeta!" Primrose Everdeen pushed past the soldiers and rushed into Peeta's office. She stopped when she saw Katniss and her wild eyes flew to Peeta. He cleared his throat and nodded to the soldiers.

"Thank you, soldiers. That will be all." He closed the door tightly and Prim ran into her sister's arms.

"Oh Katniss, I'm so sorry! I'm so so sorry!"

"It's not your fault, Prim," Katniss said, her voice muffled by Prim's dress.

"Girls, please tell me what happened," Peeta's tone was desperate. "If I'm going to get you out of this, Katniss, I need to know the truth."

"It was my fault," Prim said before Katniss could speak. "No, Katniss- it was! I was meeting Rory in the meadow," she addressed Peeta. "He wanted to have a picnic and I said yes. Katniss stopped by this morning and asked if we could talk in the meadow, but I was helping Mom with Mrs. Anderson's baby. So I told her I would meet her later. Well when I got there, Katniss wasn't there yet. Rory was. The idiot had gone into the woods before coming to the meadow, to check his snares. He had a rabbit that he was taking to Gale and he asked me to wait for him while he ran back home. I slapped him across the face and screamed that he was being stupid. You told the Hawthornes that they needed to stop hunting. And he yelled at me that they are doing what they have to to survive. I told him he is going to get himself killed and I grabbed the rabbit from him. I didn't want him being found with it in his possession and figured I could hide it in my satchel. But Katniss came up and started yelling at him too. He got mad and dropped the rabbit and left us and I was about to follow him but Katniss said she heard a noise and told me to hide. A Peacekeeper jumped out of the woods and grabbed her and another one picked up the rabbit. I was about to come out to help her but they asked her if she had poached the rabbit and she told them she had just found it in the meadow. And they dragged her here. And I knew you wouldn't let anything happen to her so I ran straight here to find you. I didn't know they would bring her here to you. Please Peeta, you have to save her! It's my fault and she did nothing wrong!"

"It's Gale and Vick all over again," Peeta shook his head. "She's trying to protect you, Prim. But the both of you should have run away from that rabbit as fast as you could."

"There wasn't time, Peeta. It was like a peacekeeper was stationed there, waiting for me." Peeta's jaw clenched. He had no doubts that was exactly what had happened. Thread knew someone hunted beyond the fence. And he had sent Peackeepers to catch whoever it was. They had to have heard the conversation between Rory and Prim, but they had arrested Katniss. Thread knew exactly what he was doing.

"Shit," he finally said, hiding his face in his hands.

"You can't sentence her, Peeta! You just can't!"

"I'm the Captain, Prim! And Thread knows who she is because he is making ME sentence her! He's testing me. Testing my loyalties."

"To hell with your loyalties! Your loyalties should be to your wife and nothing else!"

"Prim," Katniss said softly. "Stop it."

"There is no way you are going to actually whip Katniss, Peeta. If you do, you are NOT the man I thought you were."

"That will never happen, Prim," he said angrily. "But I have to figure this out. I need to talk to Haymitch."

"Haymitch? Haymitch Abernathy? Why in the world do you need to talk to him?"

"Prim, I need you to go with Peeta to Victor's Village," Katniss said softly. "Stay with him. And most importantly, you need to listen to him. He will tell you what I was going to talk to you about in the meadow. You need to do exactly as he says, Prim, do you understand?" Prim glanced at Peeta and nodded to her sister. Katniss reached for Peeta's hand.

"Take Prim to the meeting in my place."

"Katniss-"

"There's nothing we can do until morning. We can't draw attention to ourselves. I know you'll figure this out but until then, I'm stuck here." Peeta hated the thought of his wife staying in the cells overnight. He shook his head and grabbed the paperwork from his desk.

"I'll pay your fine and however much it takes to get you out of here. That will be your sentence. I'll set your bail, and then I'll pay it." He scribbled something on the paper and yanked the door open.

"Soldiers, Mrs. Mellark is free to go with a warning and a fine. See to it that the paperwork is processed while I phone General Thread." One of the men took the paperwork with a trembling hand and Peeta slammed the door again. He grabbed the phone from his desk and quickly dialed the number.

"General Thread, sir. Captain Mellark."

"Ah, Captain. I assume you are calling about the prisoner in your office."

"That's correct, sir. As I understand it, she wasn't even beyond the border. She was in the meadow and she didn't even kill the animal herself, she just found it, probably left from the REAL person who is hunting beyond the fence. So I'm issuing her a warning and setting a fine of-"

"I'll stop you right there, Captain. I had a feeling this would be a problem for you. So I've already contacted the Capitol. The Minister is in agreement with what you and I discussed this morning and he agrees that setting harsher punishments for wrong-doers is what the district needs. No more warnings and fines. There will be floggings and firing squads. Hangings and public humiliation. Now I know that she is your wife but she broke the law and you, Captain, are still bound by the law. She may not have been outside the fence this time but I'm not a fool. You have been covering for her for ages. We finally caught the person who is hunting on Capitol grounds. You will sentence her and carry out that sentence tomorrow morning."

"But sir-"

"If you have a complaint, you may take it up with Minister Antonius. Good evening to you, Captain Mellark." Peeta flinched as the call was disconnected and he dropped the phone on his desk.

"I don't believe this," he muttered under his breath. He dialed the number for the Minister of Defense but was told he was in a meeting.

"Please have him call Captain Mellark. It's urgent." He hung up and shook his head. He tried to contact Duartyr but he didn't answer either, nor did Lyme or Haymitch.

"God damn it!" He threw the phone into the wall and Prim flinched.

"Sorry," he growled, gripping his hair tightly.

"Peeta, go talk to Haymitch. It will be alright."

"How will it be alright," he demanded. "I don't know what to do here, Katniss! I seriously have no clue how to get out of this one."

"Talk to Haymitch," she said again. "He's a Victor, remember? I'll see you in the morning."

"I hate Rory Hawthorne," Prim wiped at her tears with the back of her hand. "I never want to see him again!"

"He was just doing what he had to to survive," Katniss said softly, reaching up to squeeze her sister's hand. "Don't hate him for that." Peeta was pretty irritated with all of the Hawthornes at the moment but he knew it wasn't really Rory's fault; the peacekeeper was waiting for Katniss. She had been set up. He probably would have arrested her with or without proof. He knew all of that but he still wasn't sure how he was going to free her.

"The sun is going down soon," he said in a hollow voice. "Let's get you settled and I'll take Prim home after the meeting."

* * *

Peeta squeezed back tears as he lead Katniss to the cells and watched her sit on a filthy bench. She wrinkled her nose and stood back up, wrapping her fingers around the bars.

"Pickens," he called and the young peacekeeper hurried forward.

"This is my wife, Katniss. I want you to guard her with your life, do you understand me?"

"Yes Captain," Pickens stammered. Peeta reached through the bars and cupped her cheek.

"You believe in me?"

"Always, Peeta."

"I will save you," he promised before he nodded to Pickens and turned away.

Prim waited by his desk and she jumped as he stomped into his office.

"Let's go, Prim," he said briskly, his hand on the door. Prim stayed by his side and didn't say a word as he lead the way to Victor's Village. He was grateful for her silence as they climbed the steps of Haymitch's grand house and instead of knocking, he pushed the door open. Prim seemed uncertain for a moment but continued to follow him through the house.

* * *

Haymitch looked up when he heard Peeta's heavy footsteps on the stairs and his face darkened.

"Are you insane? What is she doing here?"

"I'm here to save my sister," Prim snapped and Haymitch's brow furrowed.

"Katniss has been arrested." Purnia and another Peacekeeper jumped to their feet.

"What?"

"How," Haymitch asked, his eyes wide.

"It doesn't matter. They arrested her for poaching and the point is, she was set up. Thread is making me sentence her and wouldn't let me set her bail. You have to tell Prim everything. And then tell me how the hell to get out of this mess."

"Jesus," Haymitch muttered, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Haymitch, we have to do something," Mayor Undersee muttered. "We can't wait for 13. We need to get Katniss out of 12 now."

"Thread knows something is going on," Purnia said loudly. "It's why he had her arrested. But Peeta, you said that President Snow seemed to actually like her!"

"I'm not sure if like is the right word but he definitely seemed enchanted by her. Intrigued by her, maybe. Are you saying there's a chance he doesn't know she's been arrested?"

"It's possible," Purnia replied. "I'm starting to think Thread isn't following the President's orders anymore."

"Then whose orders is he following," Prim asked in confusion.

"We don't know, Prim," Peeta said softly. "That's what we're trying to figure out. Haymitch, you need to tell Prim what you know."

"Alright," the Victor said heavily. "Sit down, sweetheart."

* * *

While Haymitch spoke to Prim in quiet tones, Mayor Undersee introduced Peeta to the newcomers. His eyes widened in shock when two men moved forward to embrace him.

"What are you both doing here?"

"Same as you. Hoping for change, for some good to our country," Bing said gently.

"I'm no stranger to these meetings, Peeta," his father said softly. "I attended a few of them when Ash was still alive. I know what he was. And I know what Katniss is. You're taking on a heavy burden, my son."

"I have no choice, Pops. I've loved her since I was a boy."

"I know. She's a lot like her mother. Fierce. Beautiful. A fiery spirit you don't want to contend with. But this won't be an easy journey. For any of us."

"So why are you here, Dad?" Bran Mellark cast Prim a sad glance and in the shadows, he looked years beyond his age.

"I'm here for my family."

"Rye is safe, Pops. He and Madge left for 13."

"He is supposed to let us know when they arrive," the Mayor muttered. "They're accompanied by some of Commander Lyme's soldiers so we are hoping they arrive safely. But President Coin will want to know about Katniss's arrest."

"I want to try to reach Minister Antonius again. He was in a meeting when I called from the Justice Building. Surely he will tell Thread to let her go."

"Unless he is following someone else's orders as well," Bran said carefully. Bing nodded, chewing his lip anxiously.

"That's what I was thinking too."

"The Minister of Defense answers to the President directly," Peeta said dismissively. "And he controls the Peacekeepers of Panem. If Snow doesn't know about Katniss, then we have to contact him."

"I know you're recently promoted, Peeta, but I doubt even you can be transferred directly to the President," Purnia said skeptically. Peeta growled in frustration. He saw Prim rise from her seat and move to the corner of the room. He imagined she would need some time. Katniss still had a hard time with the fact that her father's death was no accident, and she had been aware of a possible rebellion for several days before she was told everything. It was information overload for a fifteen year old girl. He wanted to go and comfort his sister-in-law but all he could think about was his wife shivering in a dirty cell.

"Haymitch, how do we contact Snow?"

"I don't exactly have his office number, kid."

"I know that," he said impatiently. "But you know someone who does, don't you? He might not know about Katniss's arrest yet. And he might help us once he does."

"That's a lot of mights, Peeta. Even if we were able to contact him directly, you think he doesn't know yet?"

"Maybe not. You said yourself that Thread might be working for someone else. What if Antonius is too?"

"Then we're in big trouble. But let me contact Plutarch. If anyone can contact Snow, it's him." He went to sit at the table and started pressing buttons on the holo device. Peeta glanced over at Prim and sighed. He ran his hands through his hair, pulling it loose so it fell over his forehead. He glanced down at his uniform and suddenly felt like he was suffocating. He ripped the plastic pieces off and threw them aside, stripping down to his plain white t-shirt and white pants. He sighed as he tossed the helmet on top of the clothes pile, and crossed the room to where Prim was crouching in the corner. He knelt in front of her and gave her a kind smile.

"Hey." She peered up at him with red-rimmed eyes.

"Did you know?"

"Not until they told us in the Capitol. I'm so sorry, Prim. Your dad was a very brave man."

"I barely remember him. I was so young when he… and then Katniss became like my mom. Risking her life everyday to put food on the table. I didn't realize how much she risked when I was little. I took advantage of her. And now…"

"Hey," he reached out to cup her chin. "None of that. Your sister loves you, and she knows you love her. She will do anything to protect you. You didn't take advantage of her, Prim, you depended on her, and there's nothing wrong with that. Your parents left you and your sister was the one who was there for you. But you can help her now. You need to convince your mother that you need to leave 12."

"Haymitch said Mom told him she would never leave. Even if it's what Dad wanted. Katniss was going to try convince her, wasn't she?"

"I'm going to get her out of there, Prim, I promise. But it's up to you to convince your mom that you all have to go. You know you're in danger as long as you stay here. And you know Katniss won't leave either of you behind." Prim cocked her head and brought her knees into her chest.

"You really love her, don't you?"

"Always have. Since I was five years old, actually. I thought she was the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen and I told my Dad later that day that someday I was going to marry her." Prim smiled and rested her chin on her knee.

"Haymitch says that she can lead this rebellion. But I'm scared, Peeta. They killed Dad for it. What if they get her too? I can't lose her. She's my big sister and I-"

"She's a fighter, Prim. I can't promise that nothing bad will happen. But you know as well as I do that Katniss has a fire inside her, and if Panem sees it, we will win this war." She nodded, sighing heavily and he reached out to grip her shoulder.

"You're part of this now. You know we can't stay here much longer. You need to start packing your things tonight and be ready to run, alright? We won't let anything happen to you or your sister." Prim then did something that took Peeta completely by surprise. She leaped into his arms and wrapped hers around his neck, burying her face in his chest.

"I'm glad you're my big brother now." His arms tentatively crept around her and he closed his eyes.

"I always wanted a sister." She leaned back, smiling.

"I'm more trouble than I'm worth."

"I highly doubt that. But I'm sure I can handle it." She grinned and wiped at her face. Peeta helped her stand and squeezed her hand. Haymitch crossed the room,

looking anxious.

"What's the matter, Haymitch?"

"We've got a problem. Minister Antonius is missing."

* * *

There was silence around the room and Peeta frowned.

"What do you mean, missing?"

"Plutarch contacted the President to tell him about Katniss. Snow was angry, so he summoned his Minister of Defense. Antonius hasn't been seen all day, so Snow is sending peacekeepers to find him."

"I thought he was in meetings!"

"Apparently not."

"But Thread said he spoke to him this afternoon, that Antonius approves of cracking down on the district. How could he be missing?"

"I think it's clear that Thread is no longer following the President's orders," the Mayor said carefully.

"Well if that's the case, Snow will have him arrested and charged with treason. But how do we get Katniss out of jail?"

"Snow isn't going to just fly here to 12 to bust her out," Haymitch sighed. "We need a plan."

"We're all ears, Haymitch," Peeta gestured impatiently.

"We need to let Coin know what's going on." He hurried back to the holo and Prim cast Peeta an anxious look. He squeezed her shoulder comfortingly and moved closer to the holo. Haymitch frowned and pressed some more buttons on the device.

"Boggs, this is Haymitch Abernathy. We need to speak to President Coin."

"President Coin is in a meeting at the moment. What can I do for you, Haymitch?"

"The Mockingjay has been arrested and is in immediate danger." Peeta saw the dark-skinned man lose color in his face. Perhaps that was just the projection.

"Explain."

"She was set up and is now in jail awaiting her sentence. Her husband has been charged with the task of carrying out her sentence in the morning. Fining her won't suffice, it seems, and Thread is suggesting a flogging sentence. She's small, Commander, she won't be able to sustain many injuries."

"Understood, Haymitch. I will inform Alma immediately. Stand by." Haymitch tapped his fingers on the table, waiting for Boggs to return.

"Haymitch, we need a plan in case 13 doesn't help," Bing said urgently. "Can you lead the way to 13?"

"We had one of our men, a coal miner from the Seam, head to 13 just a week ago. He still hasn't made it. It's a dangerous journey on foot and if 13 doesn't send a hovercraft, that's exactly what we will have to do. I don't know if it can be done."

"Look, am I the only one thinking of what the Capitol did to 13? They wiped it out, Haymitch. I'm glad the people went underground and survived but our district won't have that chance!" Haymitch gave Peeta a sad look.

"I know, Peeta. We just have to warn as many people as we can and hope they listen to us."

"And if they don't? We just leave them to die?"

"Peeta, you know people won't go near the woods," Bing said heavily. "They're frightened of the Capitol propaganda. Not to mention if they keep the fence turned on, it will be impossible to get over the border. We just have to… look out for our own." Peeta's eyes were hazy.

"Are you saying your pregnant wife will willingly run away into the wilderness?"

"If I explain how bad things are, yes. We can tell them what we know, Peeta. But that's all we can do. You have to decide who's most important. This is rebellion, Peeta. We will follow you." The others nodded around him and his shoulders slumped. Prim stepped forward and slipped her small hand into his.

"I believe in you," she whispered. He squeezed and his head shot up.

"Alright. We leave tomorrow night. We cross the border and make straight for 13. But we will need some help. We need someone who has been into the woods before, who knows how to trap and hunt." He glanced at Prim and her eyes widened.

"You're joking."

"He was Katniss's hunting partner. And I know you wouldn't leave his brother behind, no matter how angry you might be with him. We have to get them to leave with us. All of them."

"Peeta, their mother is dying! She won't be able to make the trip to 13. It will take about a week on foot!"

"You have to talk to them, Prim. Talk to Rory. Gale won't even listen to Katniss anymore, and he certainly won't listen to me. Haymitch might know the way to 13 but he hasn't been in these woods. We need someone who has."

"I'll try," she said doubtfully.

"I will make a call to the Capitol and ask them to turn the fence off," the Mayor folded his hands. "Make up some excuse for it to be off for a couple of hours. That will give you enough time to get across the border with as many people as you can."

"Wait, you're not coming with us?"

"My wife is ill, Peeta. She wouldn't be able to make the trip. We will stay and wait for 13 to liberate us, once Katniss has launched the rebellion." You might not be alive long enough, he wanted to scream at him but he remained silent and merely nodded. Madge would hate him for not convincing her parents to leave too.

"Haymitch," Boggs had returned to the holo and Haymitch sat back down.

"She says she cannot risk sending a hovercraft at this time. They have not been properly maintained and she won't risk sending one out before it has been checked out. But she has summoned maintenance to see to it as we speak. Now our intel suggests it would take a week for you to reach 13 on foot. We will deploy hovercrafts as soon as we are able, but we will not be able to reach you until the day after tomorrow." Peeta was about to protest but Haymitch grabbed his shoulder.

"Alright, Boggs, we will make it past the fence."

"How many do you estimate will be with you?"

"As many as we can convince to leave," Peeta said loudly.

"We cannot liberate the entire district at this time, Captain. I assure you, 12 will be our first priority once the rebellion is officially launched."

"And I assure you that once Snow finds out that Katniss is missing, he will retaliate! Send firebombs to annihilate the district. Sorry Commander, I won't leave them behind to die."

"We will send out trucks as well, in case we cannot fit everyone into the hovercraft. We have been preparing for your arrival, Captain, but understand that we have limited resources. Accepting an entire district into our bunkers will be difficult and possibly dangerous. They will all need to go through extensive medical screenings. We will do what we can to help," Boggs added hurriedly, seeing Peeta was about to speak again. "I am just telling you the facts."

"Fine. We will be ready. Deploy your hovercrafts and your vehicles. We will cross the fence before sun down tomorrow."

* * *

After the meeting had dismissed and Bing and Bran had left to convince their wives they had to leave, Prim brought up an important point.

"What are we going to do about Katniss? Thread wants you to sentence her tomorrow morning and we can't leave the district until evening."

"I'll figure something out," he sighed. Haymitch shot him a sympathetic look. "Come on, Prim, I should get you home before your mother starts to worry."

No one spoke to Peeta or to Prim as he escorted her back to the Seam. The sun had long since set but Peeta gripped his rifle at his side.

"Talk to your mother tonight. Explain what has happened. And just be ready." She nodded and leaned in to hug him.

"I know you'll save her." He watched her go inside and dug his hands in his pockets as he turned away. He walked back to his house, which was too dark and cold for his liking. He changed into some jeans and a soft black shirt and tried to make some dinner. He couldn't stand the silence. His eyes drifted to Katniss's bag, which still sat in the corner. Shaking his head, he grabbed a loaf of bread out of the box and exited his house again.

* * *

The Justice Building was even darker and colder. Peeta shivered as he made his way down the hall, toward the cells. The young Peacekeeper, Pickens, was wide awake behind a desk, staring off into space. He jumped to his feet when he saw Peeta.

"Captain Mellark!"

"Go home, Pickens," he said gently. "I'm here to relieve you of duty."

"But sir-"

"It's alright," he pressed. "I'll watch over her. Thank you for guarding her for me." He patted the soldier's shoulder and Pickens swallowed but nodded.

"Yes sir. Goodnight Captain." When he was gone, Peeta pulled a chair up to the bars. Katniss's brow quirked from across the cell.

"What are you doing here?"

"I told you I really can't leave your side anymore. Here," he pushed the bread through the bars. "I thought you might be hungry." She grabbed the loaf and scarfed it down. Peeta's smile faded and he gripped the bars.

"I should have brought you something else. I'm sorry."

"My boy with the bread," she said through a big bite. "Making sure I don't starve." He reached through the bars and gripped her free hand.

"I need you to be ready, Katniss."

"Ready for what?"

"Just… be ready. For whatever is about to happen." She swallowed her bite and frowned.

"Peeta, what are you talking about?"

"What we discussed in the Capitol. I need you to be ready." Her eyes widened.

"But-"

"You know how much I love you, don't you?" She froze and opened and closed her mouth several times.

"Yes. Yes, I do. But-"

"You know that I'll do anything for you?"

"I wish you would stop saying that, Peeta. I don't want you to… don't you dare put yourself in harm's way for me." He stroked her cheek and tried to manage a smile.

"I took a beating for you when we were kids. I gave you that bread, knowing my mom would hit me. But I barely felt it. Because I knew you would live another day. I knew I had saved you, for that moment at least."

"Peeta-"

"What we talked about before we came home. It's happening. President Snow is going to help us move to District 4. You'll love it there. I'm going to contact him and let him know that's what we've decided." She nodded, giving him a bemused look.

"Ok. But did you… I mean, what's going to happen in the morning?"

"I won't let anything happen to you."

"But what does that-"

"Get some rest, Katniss," he cut her off, nodding toward the flimsy bench. "I'll be right here." She gave him a dubious look before she swallowed down the rest of the bread and returned to her makeshift bed. She gave him one last look and saw him nod before she pulled the blanket over her head and tried to fall asleep. She couldn't exactly ask him to sing to her but she needed to hear his voice.

"Tell me a story, Peeta."

"Ok," he replied immediately. He told her fairytales of princesses with glass shoes and wheat spun into gold and frogs becoming princes. He sensed her need for him to keep talking and he spoke soft and low, well after she had fallen asleep. He tilted his head back on the chair and closed his eyes.

"Sleep well, my love," he whispered into the night.

* * *

 _ **Shout out to Boxbex155, a happy belated birthday! Sorry I couldn't post on Saturday, I was out of town. Hope it was a great one!**_

 _ **I know yall are getting anxious- and don't judge Rory TOO harshly cause he will explain what he was thinking, in the next chapter.**_

 _ **Have a great week everyone! XOXO**_


	42. Chapter 42

Peeta hadn't meant to fall asleep. He'd planned to stay awake and watch over Katniss the entire night. But he was startled awake by heavy footsteps and a metal key being shoved into the lock.

"Captain Mellark," someone said and his eyes shot open. Two Peackeepers hovered over him. He could see another making his way into Katniss's cell.

"What's happening?"

"General Thread has arrived and is asking to speak to the prisoner. He needs the paperwork for her sentencing, sir."

"I… I haven't completed it. Tell him… shit,... tell him I'll be right there."

"Yes sir." The Peacekeeper gently shook Katniss awake and she gasped and jerked back, knocking her head against the wall.

"Move, soldier," Peeta said angrily, entering the cell. He grasped his wife's hand and his other hand cradled her head.

"General Thread wants to speak to you for a moment. I'll be right there, ok?" Her eyes shone with fear but she nodded, keeping her expression neutral. Peeta dropped her hand and nodded to the peacekeepers.

"Cuff her and take her to General Thread's office. Wait for me there." He shoved past the peacekeepers and down the hall toward his office. His secretary jumped out of the way as he pushed the door opened and disappeared through it. He went to his desk and grabbed the paperwork that bore Katniss's name. He took his pen, and with a deep breath, crossed something out and wrote a few lines. He exhaled and placed his palms on the desk, lifting his face to the ceiling.

* * *

He tucked the paperwork under his arm and made his way toward Thread's office. But the door was standing wide open and the office was empty. No peacekeeper stood in the hallway, nor was there anyone in the cells. Dread settled over him like a thick blanket as he ran to his secretary's desk.

"Miss Carter, where did they take Ka-the prisoner?"

"General Thread took her outside, Captain." Peeta moved so quickly he nearly slipped on the floor. He ran outside and saw a crowd had gathered in front of the whipping post.

The papers slipped from his hand as he registered two things: one, that Katniss had been bound to the post, her hands tugged over her head and two, Thread stood behind her in his pristine white uniform, raising a heavy whip over his head.

"STOP!" He rushed forward, blocking Katniss's body with his own.

"Soldiers," he snapped to the side and two huge peacekeepers surged forward, gripping Peeta's arms. They dragged him away from Katniss, Peeta kicking and screaming her name. Tears streamed down her cheeks at the first lash. When the whip met her skin for the third time, she cried out. People stood around, shaking their heads and muttering. Peeta managed to free himself from the first peacekeeper and he punched the second so hard he fell backwards. He rushed toward Katniss again and was met with the barrel of Thread's gun.

"I suggest you start following orders, Captain Mellark."

"You need to read the paperwork, General. You left the sentencing to me. I sentence her to ten lashes, the standard for poaching. And I accept the crime as my own. So the sentence is transferred to me." Thread's eyes narrowed and he snapped his fingers at one of the soldiers. The peacekeeper scrambled forward, holding his bleeding nose, and grabbed the papers from the ground before they could blow away. He handed them to his General and Thread's eyes scanned the paper. He spat to the side and folded the papers up.

"You're a fool, Mellark." Peeta said nothing, only lifting his chin defiantly. People muttered from the sidelines.

"Lieutenant Nerezza!" The Peacekeeper from the Capitol swaggered forward, giving Peeta an evil grin.

"Unchain the prisoner. Secure the Captain in her place." Nerezza and Cadmar quickly unchained Katniss and tossed her aside.

"Katniss!" Peeta dropped to his knees at her side, lifting her head. She blinked up at him, her lips bleeding from biting them from the pain.

"Peeta… don't…don't do this..." The soldiers grabbed Peeta by the arms and dragged him away from his wife. They ripped the shirt from his back and chained his wrists to the post. He hung his head while Thread walked around him.

"Twenty lashes is the new standard for poaching," he said loudly, addressing the crowd. "Officer Cadmar, you will carry out the sentence."

"Yes sir, General," Cadmar's smug tone made Peeta want to vomit.

"Captain Peeta Mellark, you are charged with poaching on Capitol land and stealing from the Capitol of Panem. How do you plead?"

"Peeta please," Katniss whimpered from his left.

"Guilty, General Thread," Peeta said in a hollow voice.

"The prisoner pleads guilty. Twenty lashes is the punishment. Officer Cadmar, proceed." It was pain beyond anything he had ever experienced. He grit his teeth and was determined not to make a sound but he felt his flesh being ripped from his bones. Cadmar barely waited between lashes, making the pain all blur together. Then he would pause and give Peeta a brief respite, only to feel agony all over again. He lost count after ten and felt himself about to pass out. This was worse, much worse, than anything Haemon had done to him. After awhile, he heard Katniss scream.

"Stop! Stop, that's more than 20! Stop it! You're killing him!" The lashes continued until he heard Thread's voice ordering Cadmar to cease. It was way more than 20 lashes on his back. Peeta's vision was blurred and his head felt fuzzy.

"Get him out of here," he heard Thread telling someone. His wrists were bleeding from the manacles and once they were opened, he dropped to the ground, unable to support himself in any way. Katniss stroked his hair and lifted his shoulders.

"We have to get him to my mother."

"There's no way to lift him. Dad, can you-?"

"He's too strong for me to carry. Peeta? Can you hear us, son?"

"Maybe this will help." Katniss looked up to see several miners coming forward with a large board, her old hunting partner leading the group.

"Gale?"

"Come on, Katniss. You need to get cleaned up too." He pulled her to her feet and Bran moved forward to steady her.

"But, Peeta-"

"We will take care of him," Gale said gently. "Thom, help me lift him up so we can slide the board under him. Peeta? You have to stay awake, ok? Katniss. Talk to him." She knelt next to him and squeezed his hand.

"Peeta? Can you hear me?" He groaned in response, trying to lift his head to see her.

"Careful of his back," Gale said softly. "On three… one...two...three." Peeta moaned loudly as he was shifted onto the board but Gale and his group lifted the board onto their shoulders while Bing and Bran helped support Katniss. Peeta drifted in and out of consciousness as they neared the Seam, and the door burst open when they arrived.

"Oh my god," Prim grabbed her sister's hand. "What happened?"

"Please tell me your mother is home," Bing said quietly.

"Yes, come inside." Prim and Violet both lurched into nurse mode and cleared the table for them to put Peeta onto. He cried out as he was jostled, positive that his back was on fire. Prim tried to look at Katniss's back but she shrugged her sister off, frantically gesturing toward Peeta.

"These are the worst lashes I have ever seen," Violet muttered before turning to pull things out of her cabinets. "Prim, get me several bowls of water and some clean cloths. We can't make a snowcoat so we will have to improvise."

"Katniss, sit down," Gale gently pushed her onto one of the chairs. "Let me clean you up a bit."

"I'm fine, Gale."

"No you're not. You're hurt. And you can't do him any good if you're hurt too. So the quicker you stop being a stubborn ass, the quicker you'll be able to care for your husband." Katniss blinked up at him in surprise. He had said the word without any sneering comment. After they helped position Peeta on the table, Thom and his friends left for work. Gale dabbed the wet cloth on Katniss's back and she flinched. Prim handed a bottle of clear liquid to her mother and shot Katniss a worried look. Violet uncapped the bottle and poured the liquid all over Peeta's back, drawing a pained scream. Katniss shrugged Gale off and jumped to her feet.

"What is that? It's hurting him!"

"It's ok, Peeta, you're ok," Bing tried to soothe his brother. Peeta panted into his arm, gasping for breath. Gale tried to get Katniss to sit down again but she shrugged him off.

"Gale, go to work."

"Katniss-"

"I'm fine! Prim can take care of my back when she's finished with Peeta. Really, it's ok." Gale wanted to protest but he couldn't afford to miss any work either.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

"We will take care of her," Bing assured him. "Thank you for your help, Gale." Gale nodded and gave Katniss's hand a squeeze before exiting the house. Bing took the wet cloth and sighed.

"Do you mind?" She shook her head and turned around for him to have access to her injured back.

"Sit down. Peeta isn't going anywhere anytime soon." He gently pulled her down into the chair and started to clean her as best he could.

Bran refused to leave his son's side and he watched sadly as Violet cleaned up the blood. Underneath all that blood, his back was a complete mess. Bits of flesh had been removed altogether. The wounds ran so deep, Bran could swear he saw bone.

"My poor boy," he blinked back tears as he stroked his son's curls. Peeta's eye opened and he grimaced.

"Dad?"

"I'm here, Peet."

"Katniss?"

"Your brother is taking care of her."

"She… ok?"

"She's fine, son. Try to rest. Violet and Prim are going to fix you right up." Peeta's eye closed again and he hid his face in his arm. Bran turned away to give his son some privacy, for he knew the tears streaming down his cheeks were nothing his son would be proud of. Thanks to his wife, who had taught his boys that tears were shameful.

"Drink this, Peeta," Violet helped him sit up enough to drink the tea and thankfully, the sleep syrup worked quickly. He fell asleep on the table, occasionally twitching in pain.

"Thank you, Violet," Bran breathed.

"It's nothing, Bran. He's family. But I'm afraid there isn't much more we can do for him. He needs Capitol medicine."

"Call Haymitch Abernathy," Bing said as he cleaned Katniss's back. "He will get something here."

"Yes, we need to let him know what has happened," Katniss tried to jump up but Bing gently pushed her back down.

"Hang on, you're not going anywhere. Dad can go talk to him."

"But-"

"Katniss," Bran said gently. "You're in no state to go anywhere. Let your mother and sister give you some medicine and then you get some rest. I'll go talk to Haymitch." Katniss gave Peeta a sad look and nodded.

"Ok. But tell him to hurry." Bran nodded, kissed his son's curls, and left the house quickly. On his way out, he saw one of the Hawthorne boys making his way up the porch steps, looking dejected with his hands in his pockets. Bran nodded to him as he passed, making his way towards Victor's Village.

It was a bit of a walk from the Seam and he was out of breath when he arrived in front of Haymitch's house. He could still remember when Haymitch first moved here, after he had returned from the Games. He knocked on the door and waited with bated breath. Haymitch stumbled to the door, cursing. Bran wanted to punch some sense into him, despite his generally mild manner. Haymitch had promised to take care of his boy and he knew he had been drinking again.

"Bran? What are you doing here?"

"I need your help, Haymitch. Peeta needs your help." Haymitch blinked in the sunlight.

"Shit." He turned away and motioned for Bran to follow him in. They didn't stop in the kitchen, but continued to the basement, where Haymitch knew there were no Capitol devices to hear them. Haymitch sank into a chair and picked up a bottle. Bran snapped.

"Damn it, Haymitch! You promised to take care of these kids! You promised to straighten up so Violet would trust you with her daughters! You're useless when you're drunk, you know that!"

"I get drunk so I don't have to feel, Bran! Do you see them in your sleep? All of those kids, murdered on live TV for the entertainment of those Capitol bastards? Do you hear them crying out for their mothers in their last moments? Have you killed before, Bran? No of course you haven't. So you don't know what I'm feeling, therefore you don't get to tell me how to live my life!" Bran snatched the bottle out of his hands and threw it against the wall.  
"Listen to me," he snarled. "You need to wake up and realize that people are depending on you. That child you watched over, for so many years, is all grown up and about to take on the Capitol. She can't do it by herself. She needs a mentor, like her father did. My son was tortured and twisted by the Capitol and he can't do this alone. They are ready to follow you, Haymitch. They're counting on you to get them out of 12 safely. And what happens when you get to 13? You have to stay focused and present so that you can help her be the Mockingjay you have been waiting for! I need you to WAKE UP and protect my children!" Haymitch jumped to his feet, swaying slightly, and Bran was certain he was about to hit him. But he fell back down and hid his face in his trembling hands. Bran watched the Victor's tears fall, as he had watched when a teenage Haymitch had found a dying Maysilee, both of them crying that they just wanted to go home.

"If this works, Haymitch," he whispered. "You'll never have to mentor another tribute again. We can be free. And all those deaths will have meant something." Haymitch nodded and wiped at his face.

"So you just came here to throw away my liquor?"

"No. Peeta's in very bad shape. I'm hoping you can help him." Haymitch's brow furrowed, then his eyes widened in realization.

"Shit. He took her flogging, didn't he?"

"You knew what he was planning?"

"I saw it in his face last night. He didn't know what else to do. I doubt even he realized that he would do that, until it came down to it. Did they whip her too?"

"Peeta stopped them but they got a couple of lashes in. Violet says he needs Capitol medicine. And I'm scared, Haymitch. How will he get to 13 now?" Haymitch shook his head miserably.

"He won't. He was counting on me to get her to 13. He knows he can't make the journey."

"She won't leave him behind. She could barely tear herself away from him today and she was injured too. How are you going to convince her to leave him?"

"I'm not. He'll be the one to do it. Those injuries will take weeks to heal and we don't have that kind of time. We have to get Katniss to 13 tomorrow."

"She's injured too, Haymitch. I don't know if she will be able to walk as quickly as you need her to. Maybe if we postpone the plan-"

"We can't," he cut the baker off. "I got word this morning that President Snow was taken to the hospital last night."

"The hospital? Why?"

"They think it's poison. Although they're not sure how."

"So what, we are dealing with some kind of Capitol coup?"

"It would seem like it," he said heavily. "And Peeta is right in the middle of it."

* * *

Rory Hawthorne started to knock but thought better of it, and pushed the Everdeen's door open. He stepped inside and felt his stomach roil at the stench of blood. Ignoring his discomfort, he made his way into the kitchen where he saw Prim and Mrs. Everdeen tending to a patient. Rory winced at the sight of the person. Normally, he wouldn't mind seeing a Peacekeeper in pain but this was different. He had come to respect this Peacekeeper. Even started to like him. His bare back was completely disfigured, marred by bloody lashes. Prim caught sight of him and her face darkened.

"Get out."

"Prim-"

"I don't want to hear it. Get out, Rory. I don't want to see you. None of us do." He cast the room a desperate look and saw Katniss hunched over on a chair, Peeta's older brother pressing a wet cloth to her back. He could see she was bleeding too.

"Listen," Rory stammered. "I am so sorry. I never thought-"

"You never thought someone else would suffer for your stupidity? How many times did Peeta tell you not to go into the woods, Rory? He warned you and your family because he knew something would happen! And it did! It almost happened to my sister!" Rory cast Katniss a horrified look.  
"And now look. Because he loves her so much, Peeta took Katniss's whipping. So look at him. This is what YOU did."

"Prim," Katniss said gently, wincing as Peeta's brother spread some kind of medicine across her injuries. Rory's eyes filled with tears.

"I never meant for anyone to get hurt," his voice broke but he didn't care. Primrose's opinion of him meant everything and he couldn't stand the anger in her eyes.

"Mom is… she's dying, Prim. And I know you already knew that but she hasn't eaten. She's given every scrap of meat to Posy. I thought if maybe she could get some kind of protein, she would be able to fight this… whatever this is. I wasn't thinking… when you were screaming at me, I just lost it because I feel so helpless, all the time! Gale goes to the mines and he's the only one bringing any money in… I just want to help my family, Prim. My baby sister is starving to death, my little brother is becoming so angry and bitter with the world, and my big brother is carrying the whole family on his shoulders. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean for any of this to happen and if I could take it back… I would have held onto that rabbit and taken the punishment myself." Prim shook her head but Katniss rose to her feet.

"I'm not saying what you did was smart, Rory. But there were peacekeepers waiting for me. Peeta doesn't want to admit it but they have probably known for a long time and were just waiting to catch me. I know how bad things are for your family. I don't blame you for this. Neither would Peeta." Rory cast Prim a hopeful glance and her nostrils flared.

"You're still a giant idiot, Rory Hawthorne. I'm still angry with you. But I understand. Just realize that this could have been you on my table," she waved her hand toward Peeta's still body and Rory grimaced.

"Is he going to be ok?"

"Our dad is going to see about some medicine," Bing said heavily, folding the cloth and draping it over the chair. "And I should really get home to April. Katniss, do you need anything before I go?"

"No, thank you for your help Bing." The eldest Mellark nodded and walked around to stroke his brother's hair.

"He's been through too much for being only eighteen years old." Katniss hobbled to Peeta's side and covered his hand with hers.

"I'm older than him. I never even asked him when his birthday is."

"It's June 2nd," Bing said with a small smile.

"I'll have to make him a birthday cake. I'm a terrible baker though."

"Lucky for you, you have bakers in your family now. Get some rest, Katniss." Bing squeezed her hand. "Thank you all for taking such good care of him."

"We will keep you updated. Tell Bran that we need that medicine soon, though. Preferably before he wakes. He will be in a lot of pain when he wakes up." To prove the point, Peeta moaned in his sleep. Bing nodded sadly.

"I'll tell him. Good day to you all." He gave them a weak smile before he exited the house. Rory sighed and leaned against the chair.

"Can I do anything to help?"

"There isn't much more to do, until we get some medicine. I'm most worried about infection right now. It's difficult to keep the wounds clean when they're exposed like this. Prim, go ahead and clean and bandage his wrists as well. I'll see to Katniss."

"I'm fine, Mom."

"You want to be able to move tomorrow? Sit down and let me give you some salve." She huffed but took a seat. Prim glanced up at Rory as she cleaned Peeta's wrists.

"I need to talk to you. Wait for me and we will take a walk." He nodded and watched her tend to her patient. She was so tender, so good with her hands. He knew he wanted Prim as his wife one day. His brothers called him crazy but Peeta had fallen in love with Katniss when he was five years old and no one called HIM crazy! Prim gently set Peeta's hands down and Rory watched carefully as she wrapped the clean bandage around his wrist.

"I'm finished Mom. I'm going to walk with Rory."

"Don't go far," Katniss said, her head lowered.

"I'll be careful, Katniss, don't worry." She beckoned for Rory to follow her outside and nearly ran into Haymitch.

"Sorry sweetheart," he grunted.

"Did you bring some medicine for him?"

"I brought what I could find. I'll have to order the rest but this is some Capitol-grade morphling so it should help with the pain."

"Mom gave him some sleep syrup but he will be awake in a few hours. Mom is inside with Katniss, if you want to go in. I'm going to walk Rory home." Haymitch could see the anger in the younger Everdeen's eyes and felt a stab of sympathy for the Hawthorne boy. But they needed Rory. And Gale. They needed them to leave with them, and he wasn't sure how they would take the news. Prim and Rory walked down the lane and out of earshot of the Capitol devices. Haymitch watched them go, hoisting the bag over his shoulder as he entered the tiny house.

He winced when he entered the kitchen and saw Peeta first.

"Damn they did a number on him," he muttered as he set the bag against the wall.

"Haymitch," Katniss said in a muffled voice.

"Hey sweetheart. How you holding up?"

"I'll be fine," she said stiffly. "But Peeta…Haymitch, please tell me you brought something that can help him."

"Mayor Undersee gave me a few bottles of his wife's morphling. They supply him pretty well, so he gave us what he could. I contacted Plutarch and Duartyr and they are ordering more. How is he doing, Violet?"

"How do you think he's doing, Haymitch," Katniss's mother said stiffly. "I can see his bones. The wounds are deeper than any I've ever seen. I can't believe he was conscious through the whole thing. My daughter was only whipped three times and I can't get the wounds to stop bleeding. Peeta needs help. Help that I can't provide." Haymitch turned back to Peeta and chewed his lip.

"We'll have to send him to the Capitol."

"No!" Katniss leaped to her feet, making her mother jump. "Haymitch, we can't! He's not going back there."

"Katniss, we can't help him here. We don't have the medicine he needs. If he stays here, he will die."

"Then I'm going with him."

"Sweetheart, you know that's impossible-"

"If you send him back there, I'm going with him! I'm not going… anywhere without him. He's my husband. I'm staying with him." Haymitch sighed and cast Violet a pleading look, but her eyes were cold. She stood up and folded her hands.

"I hope you will accompany my daughter and her husband to the Capitol, Haymitch." He scoffed at Violet, then turned to appeal to Katniss.

"Katniss, you know it's not a good idea for you to be in the Capitol. They will take good care of him, and then he will return to you. But you have somewhere else to be."

"It's as dangerous for him as it is for me," she said through her teeth. "I will not leave his side." Haymitch glanced at Peeta and hoped against hope that the boy could talk some sense into her when he woke up. Of course Haymitch wouldn't want to be left alone either. But Peeta had always put Katniss's safety first. His mangled back was proof of that. Haymitch had no doubts that Peeta would beg for Katniss to go to 13 without him.

He wished Peeta had been able to come up with another plan. Katniss wouldn't cooperate without Peeta, and they needed to get the Mockingjay to 13. He almost even wished that Peeta had let Katniss take the sentence. An injured Mockingjay was better than no Mockingjay at all.

No, he decided. As strong as Katniss's will was, her body was not. She had nearly starved to death as a child. Twenty lashes would have killed her. Peeta had done the only thing he could think of.

He wouldn't be able to recover without Capitol medicine, though. Haymitch knew Katniss understood that but he also knew the Mockingjay's devotion ran deep. Peeta had spoken his doubts of her love for him but Haymitch knew better. He could see it in the way she ran her fingers through the boy's curls, the way her body unconsciously leaned into his, the way tears filled her silver eyes.

Now he would have to tell Coin that they had to change the plan. And he knew she wouldn't be happy. Coin was all about duty and obligation. He doubted she would much care for Katniss's love for her husband. He wanted to tell Katniss what she had found out about President Snow and what was going on in the Capitol but he knew now wasn't the time.

"I'll come back later to check on the boy. You get some rest, sweetheart, you look terrible."

"Thanks," she said stiffly. Haymitch approached Violet and nodded.

"You and I need to talk."

"I have nothing to say to you."

"Then I'll do the talking. And you're going to listen to me. For your daughter's sake." Her eyes narrowed and she crossed her arms.

"I'll be back this evening." Haymitch set the bottles of medicine on the counter and hoisted the bag over his shoulder. Violet watched him closely as he exited the house and headed back towards Victor's Village.

* * *

 _ **I had to split this chapter so it may be a little shorter than you expected! Sorry for the angst. Peeta is my favorite character so trust me, it hurts me to write him like this but Mockingjay was actually my favorite book because of all he went through and then overcame! But enough talk. Have a great week everyone! XOXO**_


	43. Chapter 43

"Why don't you get some rest, Katniss," she said softly, coming back into the kitchen and seeing her daughter leaning over Peeta.

"I can't."

"He's sleeping. There isn't anything you can do for him right now. How about I make you some tea with sleep syrup as well?"

"No, I don't want any. And I don't want to leave him. What if he wakes up and asks for me?"

"He will be out for several hours at least. Please, dear, try to get some rest." Katniss sighed deeply and nodded without removing her eyes from Peeta. Finally she looked up at her mother and her eyes were hard.

"I know Prim talked to you last night. And judging how you were treating Haymitch, you didn't really listen close enough."

"Katniss-"

"Do you think this is an accident," she waved her hand toward her husband. "Do you think it's a happy coincidence that I get arrested right after we come home from the Capitol? It's time to act, Mom. Way past time."

"You don't know what you're saying."

"Neither do you, Mom. You didn't listen to him when we were young. You're going to listen to me, though. You can't stay here. And I can't believe you went against Dad's wishes. If you loved him so much, why didn't you do as he asked?"

"You need to sleep and stop thinking of all of this," Violet hurried to the counter and poured some tea into a mug. Katniss glared at her but threw her head back, downing the tea and she set the mug aside.

"You'll wake me if anything changes? If he wakes up?"

"Of course." She nodded and cast Peeta one last heartbroken look before she dragged herself into the bedroom and flung herself on the bed.

* * *

Peeta and Katniss were still sleeping when Prim arrived home. Violet was measuring out morphling in the syringe and Prim picked one up.

"Will this be enough?"

"Hardly. We think it's best to send Peeta back to the Capitol. Katniss has insisted on accompanying him." Prim's eyes widened.

"But… she can't! She has to-"

"Your sister doesn't HAVE to do anything," her mother said impatiently. "And of course she wants to stay by her husband's side. I don't fault her for that."

"I don't either. But Haymitch has already made arrangements for her to leave 12. She needs to go, Mom."

"I don't know when you became so fond of Haymitch Abernathy but he's not as saintly as you are making him out to be." Prim shook her head slowly.

"Mom, I know what you think of him. But it wasn't his fault. None of it. Daddy made his choice."

"Did Katniss make hers? Because it sounds to me that everyone is just expecting her to do this. Just because her father made some stupid mistakes, doesn't mean she has to follow in his footsteps." Prim gaped at her mother.

"Daddy wasn't stupid and neither is Katniss. And I know you know that. You can't possibly be happy about how things are right now."

"It's the way things are, Primrose. And I don't want to hear anything else about it. Check on your sister for me, please." Prim sighed deeply and went into her bedroom, where Katniss was sleeping on her stomach. She sat on the edge of the bed and gently stroked her sister's hair. The wounds on her back had finally stopped bleeding but Katniss wasn't the one Prim was worried about. Peeta's wounds were already showing signs of infection. Her mother was right, he needed Capitol medicine. But she didn't want Katniss to return to the Capitol. Would Peeta be able to convince her not to come with him?

Katniss stirred and Prim flinched, waiting to see if she would settle again. When she did, Prim sighed and backed out of the room.

"She's still sleeping," she said softly.

"Good. So is he. Will you start on dinner?" Prim had learned to cook at a very early age, having to take care of their mother while Katniss hunted and bartered. She pulled some things out of the cabinets and prepared a hearty stew. Peeta had been supplying them with food and money since he had married her sister, and she was grateful to him for not only taking care of Katniss but the whole family as well. She glanced at her brother-in-law and bit her lip.

"Do you want me to wake Katniss up so she can eat?"

"Let's let her sleep awhile longer. Save a bowl for her for when she wakes up."

"I made a lot," Prim said as she spooned some into a bowl for her mother. There was a knock at the door and Violet frowned.

"It's almost dark out." But Prim hurried to the door and gestured Haymitch to come in.

"How are the kids?"

"Sleeping," Prim said softly. "Would you like a bowl of stew? I made it myself."

"Well I won't say no then. Thanks sweetheart." He accepted the bowl and nodded to Violet as he sat across from her. She shook her head as she lifted the spoon to her mouth.

"Do not start talking about things that will get us into trouble."

"Plutarch checked into it and this house hasn't been bugged for some time. Think the wires were too faulty and no one ever bothered to repair them. So the Capitol has no idea what I'm about to say."

"I still don't want to hear it," she said stiffly.

"Tough. You chased me off when they were young, Violet, but your daughters aren't children anymore. Your eldest is about to take on the goddamn Capitol. Your son-in-law just took a beating worse than anything we've ever seen. And your husband died for his silver tongue. So the least you can do is hear me out." Violet glared at him with so much hatred that Prim scooted her chair back.

"I suggest you channel your anger toward the Capitol, Violet. I'm not the enemy here. You need to remember who the real enemy is."

"Ash said you encouraged him to make more videos. To use Katniss in them. To try to leave the district. You encouraged him to do all of the things that got him killed!"

"I grew up with Ash Everdeen. He was always a stubborn pain in the ass, a trait you both share! If his mind was set to something, no one could change it. And yeah, I wanted to see a different Panem than what I knew. So I encouraged him to fight for what he believed in. I'm sorry if you think that's a crime."

"You're going to get my daughter killed too."

"It's different this time."

"How?"

"Because District 13 has agreed to fight with us and it is the first time in over seventy years that 13 districts stand united. We can take down the Capitol, Violet! Your daughter can take down the Capitol." Violet pushed her bowl aside and shook her head.

"Look," Haymitch scooted his chair closer. "I know we've never gotten along. But I was happy for him when he fell in love with you. He was my best friend. His death haunts me every day. But he wanted me to take you and your girls to 13 if anything happened to him, because he had an inkling that Katniss could be a voice in the revolution too. He wanted you all to be safe. 13 is free of the Capitol. Your girls could have been raised without having to worry about where their next meal would come from, or hearing their names be called at a Reaping. You three would have been better off, but you refused to leave. Katniss has to go, and I want you and Prim to go with her. She won't leave you behind but you're killing her if you make her stay here."

"All of this is irrelevant now. She won't leave without Peeta. And he can't make the journey."

"I'm arranging their transport to the Capitol and making sure we have a guard around them 24/7. I can't go with them this time."

"Are you still leading people out of 12 tonight," Prim asked quietly.

"We've pushed the escape to tomorrow night. Mayor Undersee plans to tell his counterpart in the Capitol that a child has gone missing and we are leading a search party. It will have them turn the fence off AND get the peacekeepers off our backs for a bit. Purnia will lead a few Peacekeepers with us, so it doesn't look suspicious. We have several who are loyal to the rebellion."

"And more who aren't. What did they say about this," Violet waved her hand toward Peeta.

"They think Thread isn't working for Snow anymore. Someone else is calling the shots. And they have to be pretty powerful because the Minister of Defense is missing. So Antonius has either been killed or he's working for the same person."

"So what makes you think Peeta and Katniss are safe in the Capitol?"

"Duartyr, who was Peeta's commander in 2, is still highly respected in the Capitol. He's sworn to protect them. Not only that, we have multiple Peacekeepers and Victors on our side. Peeta will be safe."

"And Katniss," Prim said, her eyes wide. "You said your first priority is Katniss."

"It is, sweetheart. That's why she won't be in the Capitol for long." Prim gaped at the Victor.

"You're going to take her to 13 by force," she whispered. "Because you know she won't leave him."

"We won't make any decisions until we talk to Peeta. But Katniss must get to 13 as soon as possible. And Peeta will agree with that."

"My husband put this so-called rebellion before everything, even his own family," Violet snarled. "But not everyone feels the same, Haymitch." Haymitch opened his mouth to speak when a soft moan reached their ears. Prim jumped to her feet and rushed around the table.

"Hi Peeta," she whispered, covering his hand with hers.

"Prim?"

"Yeah. I'm right here. Katniss is asleep in the next room. Can I get you anything?"

"Water?"

"Of course." While she poured some water at the sink, Haymitch knelt in front of him so Peeta could see his eyes.

"H-mitch?"

"Hey kid," he said with a weak smile. "You don't look so good." Peeta squeezed his eyes shut and tried to shift himself without disturbing his back. But the moment he moved, fire shot across his back and he cried out.

"Don't try to move too much," Violet said, rushing to his side. Prim brushed his hair out of his eyes as she held the cup to his lips. He was too weak to lift his head so Haymitch and Violet helped him drink. He closed his eyes as the water touched his dry tongue.

"Can he have some food, Mom?"

"He needs to eat. See if you can get a few spoonfuls in." Prim brought over a bowl and held up the spoon.

"I made stew," she said half-heartedly. "Are you hungry?" He tried to nod but released a moan instead. Prim held the spoon to his lips while Haymitch and Violet held him steady. He ate several spoonfuls before he moaned and lowered his face to the table.

"Hurts," he said weakly.

"I know," Violet smoothed back his hair. "I'll give you some morphling but we have to be careful. We don't want you to become addicted to the stuff."

"Just give him the damn drug to help with the pain," Haymitch said gruffly. Violet shot him a look before she retrieved a syringe and located a spot near Peeta's shoulder.

"Hold still," she said gently as she pushed the needle in. Peeta cried out but relaxed instantly as the drug started to take effect.

"That should help."

"Is Ka-nis ok," he asked, his eyes closing.

"You saved her life, Peeta," Prim said, lowering to her knees. She stretched her arms out on the table, as if she were hugging him. "You're the best brother in the world."

"I… didn't reach her… in time. They… beat her-"

"She's going to be just fine, kid," Haymitch said patiently. "Prim's right, you saved her. Twenty lashes would have killed her. You saved her life again." Peeta tried to smile.

"She has to go."

"You can talk to her when she wakes up. Get some more rest, ok?" He didn't say anything else and Haymitch knew he had fallen asleep. He looked up at Violet, his brow furrowed.

"How is Katniss, really?"

"She's in pain but she will be fine. Three lashes didn't do a lot of damage but she can't move around a lot. She will be better tomorrow."

"Good. They leave tomorrow afternoon. And then we leave tomorrow night," his eyes flicked to Prim. "Did you talk to your boy?"

"He's not my boy," she said sharply and Haymitch's brow quirked. Prim sighed. "Fine. Yes, I talked to Rory. Told him everything and he was going straight to talk to Gale on the way home from the mines. He said he doesn't know what Gale will do but… he said he would stay by my side, wherever I go."

"One Hawthorne is better than none. But I hope Gale comes and brings his other siblings."

"I also told him about their mother," she said in a small voice. Violet's eyes widened while Haymitch looked confused.

"Hazelle? What about her?"

"She's dying." Haymitch turned to Violet in question and she shook her head.

"Cancer. She doesn't have long. The drugs have no effect on the disease."

"Damn. They won't leave her in that state." Haymitch rubbed the back of his neck and sighed.

"I'd better get home. Thanks for the stew, sweetheart." He cupped the girl's chin and smiled.

"A couple of Peacekeepers are coming around tomorrow to help get Peeta to the train station. Tell Katniss to pack what she can. And you both should pack what you'll need as well."

"Wouldn't it be better to send Primrose along with Katniss to the Capitol?"

"I don't want Prim anywhere near that place. It's bad enough Katniss has to go back. No, I'll follow Ash's wishes and escort his wife and daughter to 13 myself. Be ready to run, Violet. Pack light but take what means something to you. I don't know if there will be a 12 to come back to." Prim gasped and Haymitch patted her cheek before he took his leave.

* * *

Sometime after Violet and Prim had gone to bed, Katniss awoke and crept into the kitchen, the blanket around her shoulders. She pulled a chair in front of the table and pulled Peeta's hand to her lips. He stirred at the touch and his eyes opened blearily.

"Hi," she whispered, moving his palm to her cheek.

"Hi." She squeezed back tears at how weak his voice sounded.

"Why did you do it, Peeta?" He blinked up at her.

"Because I love you." She stifled a sob. Peeta shifted around and tried to lift his head.

"And I know you love me too. Even if you won't say it." He flipped his hand around and stroked her cheek with his knuckles. Katniss turned her face so he wouldn't see her tears. He cupped her chin and rubbed with his thumb.

"Why can't you tell me, Katniss?" She shook her head but couldn't answer. She had been asking herself that very question. Why couldn't she just tell him what he longed to hear? Especially after what he had done for her. He had saved her life, again, and she couldn't even stammer out three words? He groaned and lowered his arm back to the table.

"Listen Katniss. You know what this means. I can't-"

"No," she said sharply, looking at him now. "Don't say it."

"You need to go," he pleaded. "And I can't make the journey. You-"

"You're going to the Capitol to get help, and I'm coming with you. When you're better, we will go together."

"But-"

"Stop it, Peeta. I said I'm not leaving you. Ever. You swore to me that no one would tear us apart."

"Katniss-"

"I heard Haymitch say he arranged transport for us tomorrow. We are going together."

"It's dangerous," he said sternly.

"Exactly. So you'll need me there to protect you." Even when he was wrought with pain, Peeta rolled his eyes.

"Katniss, stop being stubborn. You have to make it to 13. Without me."

"We're done talking about this. I'm staying with you. Now do you want some more medicine?"

"Your mom gave me morphling but I'm in so much pain, I don't know if it did anything." Katniss stood and surveyed his back. She felt nauseated at the sight.

"Those Peacekeepers are absolute monsters."

"Was your mom able to fix me up?" She didn't want to lie but she couldn't tell him his back was red and raw and absolutely terrifying to look at it. There was a stench in the air from his wounds. She hadn't thought it had been long enough to get infected. But the humid air did not bode well for his exposed injuries.

"Yeah," she finally said. "Looking better already." He knew she was lying, could hear it in her voice, but he decided not to say anything.

"You should try to sleep more," he said, closing his eyes.

"I've slept all day. You get some more rest. Let me know if you need anything."

"Actually, there is something that could help."

"OK," she prepared to run to the cabinets for some kind of herb.

"Kiss me." She stared at him before she lowered her lips to his cheek. He turned, his nose nudging her cheek, until their lips met. It was soft and a little painful on account their lips were cut, but Peeta moaned against her mouth and his shaking hand grasped hers. When she pulled away, he opened his eyes and his lips

curved upwards.

"Thank you. I'll be up and about in no time."

"If only my kisses had some real healing power," she sighed, lowering her forehead to his cheek. "If only there were something I could actually do!"

"You being here with me is the best medicine," he whispered. "I'll survive because I have you." She squeezed his hand.

"You are my world, Peeta Mellark," she whispered. "Don't ever leave me."

"I'm not going anywhere," he said gently. "If those Capitol bastards think this will break us, they've got another thing coming." She sighed deeply and lowered her head beside his, taking comfort in his warm breath on her face. They fell asleep like that, their hands still entwined.

* * *

Violet awoke early and decided to give Peeta a bit more morphling so he could sleep soundly. She watched her daughter sleep, knowing she would have an awful ache in her neck when she woke but she also knew Katniss would refuse to leave his side. Sighing, she turned to start on breakfast. As she picked up an egg, she thought about how difficult things had been since Ash had died. Granted, living in 12 they had always been poor but as a Merchant, she was still able to afford luxuries like eggs and butter and new cotton to make new clothes and new shoes when hers would get holes in them. She hadn't been able to provide any of that for her girls. She glanced at Katniss and sighed heavily. Her daughter had been forced to grow up much too fast. Her little girl was busy making sure they stayed alive while her mother, the person who should have been providing for her, was unable to move from her bed. Violet shook her head, trying to shake away the memories.

Haymitch's words from the previous night stayed with her.

"Your girls could have been raised without having to worry about where their next meal would come from, or hearing their names be called at a Reaping. You three would have been better off, but you refused to leave."

She'd been so angry with Haymitch for so long that she still didn't want to go anywhere with him. But she knew he was right. She didn't even know anything about 13 but she knew her daughters would have been so much better off growing up there instead of 12.

"Morning," her youngest yawned as she reached for a cup.

"Morning Prim. I'm cooking eggs for breakfast."

"Smells great. I can't believe Peeta gave us an allowance for food. I don't even remember the last time I ate an egg."

"Katniss has brought home duck eggs more than once. Why don't you wake her up and see if she's hungry? We will let Peeta sleep as long as we can." Prim nodded and moved toward Katniss.

"Don't wake her yet, Prim," Peeta's deep voice scared both women. "She was up late with me."

"You scared me, big brother," Prim scolded him. Violet inhaled sharply and glanced at them over her shoulder. "Mom's making breakfast. Are you hungry?"

"Not really." Prim cast her mother a worried look.

"Can I take a look at your back?"

"Yeah." Prim inspected the wounds, then brought a hand to his forehead.

"Peeta, you're burning up."

"Yeah, I don't feel so great." Prim chewed her lip and looked at her mother.

"What can I give him for the fever?"

"We have some tablets in the left cabinet. Give him some more morphling for the pain. And I'll make some tea to help him relax." Prim flew to the cabinets, pulling out herbs and medicines, and Violet thought about trying to pack all of it in a bag. She wouldn't be able to take everything with her. And she had a feeling they would all need healing in the near future.

"Chew these, Peeta," Prim said softly, sliding the tablets into his mouth. He chewed obediently and she helped him swallow some water.

"Can I sleep?"

"You need to eat something. That medicine will make you sick on an empty stomach."

"Not hungry," he mumbled.

"That's the fever talking," Prim said soothingly. "Mom, he's starting to shiver." Violet was about to answer when there was a knock at the door. Since Prim was still tending to Peeta, Violet hurried to the door and her eyes widened when she opened it.

"Good morning, Violet."

"Good morning, Bran. Come inside."

"I hope I didn't wake you?"

"Not at all. I'm cooking breakfast and Prim is treating Peeta."

"How is he?" She stopped and looked up at him. The years had been kind to him but she saw the sadness and worry swirling around in his Merchant blue eyes.

"Not well," she said quietly. Bran winced.

"Is there anything I can do?"

"He needs to get to the Capitol as soon as possible. There's nothing else either of us can do." She could see he was holding back tears and she wrapped her arms around him, holding him close. Bran tightened his hold on Violet, the only woman he had ever really loved, and allowed her to hold him, to run her hand through his hair, to whisper soothing words in his ear. He didn't want to hold himself together anymore, because his wife had told him not to break down in front of people, to hold it together for the family name. Bran couldn't care less about the family name, only about the broken boy on his former lover's table. His boy. His youngest (and though he would never say it aloud) his favorite son. He took a step back and rubbed at his face.

"Can I see him?"

"Of course." She squeezed his hand and he wished she hadn't let go as he followed her into the kitchen.

One glance at his son told him that Violet was right. He needed to leave for the Capitol immediately. He was shivering violently even as Prim wiped the sweat from his brow. His back was red and inflamed, his eyes were unfocused and hazy, and he continued to moan in pain.

"Dad," Peeta caught sight of his father and Bran dropped to his knees in front of the table.

"I'm here, my boy. I'm right here."

"Dad… I need you to promise me..." Peeta winced in pain but Bran waited for him to speak again. "Promise me you will get out of 12. Get Mom to leave. Bing. April. Delly. Get them all to leave and follow Haymitch to 13. Promise me you'll go."

"Your mother says she isn't going anywhere, Peet," he said quietly. "She says it's all crazy talk and she's staying right here. Bing convinced April but she looks ready to pop. He's terrified she will go into labor while we're running."

"Then Mrs. Everdeen has to go with you," Peeta gasped out. "To help her."

"Peeta, I'm not-"

"You know you have to go," he said urgently. "Katniss needs you and Prim with her in 13."

"You will be with us too," Prim squeezed his hand. "You can't leave her, Peeta."

"God knows I don't want to but… I mentioned to her that we might be star-crossed lovers and I'm starting to think we really are."

"No you're not," Prim said firmly. "Katniss needs you, Peeta! She is actually happy now. She actually smiles. And you do that. Not Mom. Not me. You."

"Peet, you have to hold on son. The Capitol will be able to fix you up. You just have to hold on until you get there."

"I'm holding on. But I want to know that my family is safe. Dad will carry you over his shoulders if he has to, Violet." She quickly looked at Bran and saw a blush starting to rise in his rounded cheeks.

"I'll talk to your mother again," he said quietly. "And I'll make sure Violet and Prim stay safe. I promise." Peeta nodded and rested his chin on the table.

"Don't tell Katniss how bad off I am."

"She will know as soon as she looks at you," Prim shook her head. "And she will tell you the same thing. You had better hold on and stay with her."

"How'd I get so lucky… to marry into a family of amazing women," he managed a weak smile. Bran stroked his son's face and sighed.

"Bing and I managed to pack some of your things last night. We packed a bag for Katniss but we weren't sure what else she would like to take."

"I'll go over there and pack her personal things," Prim volunteered. "I'll go right now."

"Be careful," Violet said and Bran stood up.

"I'll escort her, Violet."

"Prim," Peeta said weakly and she knelt in front of him so he could look into her eyes. "On my bedside table, you'll find a small gold pin. A mockingjay. Please make

sure Katniss has it."

"Ok Peeta. What else can I pack for you?"

"My sketchbooks. Please make sure my sketchbooks are packed. And some pencils. There's also a small green box, in my drawer beside the bed. Pack that for me as well."

"You've got it. I'll be back as soon as I can." Bran wrapped an arm around Prim's shoulder and lead her to the door.

"Bran," Violet called out, hurrying after them. He paused, looking back and waiting.

"Please…" she trailed off, biting her lip. Bran's face softened and he reached out to squeeze her hand.

"She's safe with me, Vi."

"I know." He gave her a reassuring smile before leading Prim outside. Violet returned to the kitchen to keep an eye on Peeta. When Katniss woke, Peeta told her she needed to pack any necessary belongings she had left behind when she had moved out. While she threw things into a bag, Peeta tried to lean up on his elbows but fell to his chest, moaning in pain.

"I'm ready," Katniss announced, slinging her hunting bag over her shoulder.

"Someone should be here any minute to help carry him to the train station." The very next minute there was a sharp knock at the door and the sound of voices in the hallway. Prim and Bran lead the way, followed by three Peacekeepers, with Gale, Thom, and Rory bringing up the rear. Katniss sighed with relief when she saw Gale and Thom carrying the board they had used to transport Peeta here.

"You look awful, boss," Purnia muttered.

"Least it matches how I feel," Peeta groaned.

"Let's do this slowly and carefully," Thom said, nodding toward the table. Gale and Rory moved forward, with Burns and Pickens taking their places on the other side of Peeta. They were able to wedge the board underneath Peeta and slowly set him on their shoulders. Peeta winced but didn't make a sound.

"Mrs. Mellark, you can ride with him," Purnia nodded toward the cart they had brought while the men loaded Peeta into the back. Katniss nodded and turned back to Prim. She knelt to the ground and pulled her sister in for a hug.

"I will see you soon, ok?"

"Be careful," Prim whispered, hugging her tightly.

"I forget how grown you are," Katniss replied. "How much older and more mature you are now. I know I can count on you. Help Haymitch get them to safety."

"I will, Katniss. You take care of yourself and your husband, ok? I want to see you in 13 safely."

"You'll see both of us," she assured her sister. "We will meet you in a few days." Katniss kissed her sister's fair cheek and stood up to face her mother.

"Please listen to Haymitch. You don't have to like him. But listen to him. And get there safely." Violet nodded, sighing and Katniss embraced her.

"Keep Prim safe."

"You stay safe. Promise me?"

"Promise." Katniss approached Gale next and Rory bit his lip.

"Katniss, I'm so-"

"Don't Rory. I told you I don't blame you for this."

"Ma has already had a long talk with him," Gale glanced at his brother.

"Gale… we need you. 12 needs you."

"I can't leave my mother behind, Katniss. Posy isn't up to making that journey either."

"Then carry her on your shoulders. Hazelle would not want you to stay here for her. You have to help your people get to safety."

"I get what you're doing, Catnip," Gale said, surprisingly gently. "I really do. But she's my mother. I can't leave her to die."

"But-"

"Go to the Capitol with your husband," he cut her off. "And then get yourself to 13. Maybe one day, we will see each other again." Katniss sighed but she knew Gale's mind was set. She glanced at Rory and saw him slip his hand into Prim's.

"You take care of her, Rory."

"With my life, Katniss." Katniss nodded and climbed into the cart beside Peeta, despite Soldier Burns asking her if she preferred sitting up front. Purnia jumped up beside Burns and Thom and Gale took a step back.

"Thank you for your help," Katniss called. Purnia saluted the small group.

"Pickens will cover us until we reach the train station, and then he will return to you. You all be careful and wait for Haymitch's signal. It won't be long."

"Be safe, Katniss. We love you." Katniss waved to her mother and sister and saw Gale put three fingers to his lips before raising them into the sky. It was an old and rarely used gesture of the district, occasionally seen at funerals. It meant thanks and admiration, and more importantly, it meant good-bye to someone you love.

Katniss returned the gesture and the cart lurched forward. Peeta moaned and Katniss reached for his hand.

"We're safe and we're together," she whispered, watching her family fade into the dust.


	44. Chapter 44

It was a calm ride until they reached the train station. Katniss could see Purnia stiffen and pull out her gun.

"What's going on, Purnia?"

"I'm not sure. Pickens, you and Burns get the Captain on the train. I'll see what the trouble is."

"But Soldier-" Purnia leaped out of the cart before Burns could protest. Peeta tried to lift his head.

"What's happening?"

"Mrs. Mellark, why don't you take yours and the Captain's bags to the porter?" Katniss nodded but slung the four bags over her shoulder and stood next to the cart while Burns and Pickens decided the best way to lift Peeta.

"Soldiers, I'm too heavy. Let me try-"

"Don't you dare," Katniss hissed before he could get up. "Let me set these bags in our compartment so I can help." She jogged up to the platform and presented hers and Peeta's tickets. She quickly found an empty compartment near the back of the train so it would be easier to help Peeta on and off. She pulled the compartment closed and jumped off the platform, nearly screaming when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Easy sweetheart, it's just me."

"Haymitch," she gasped. "What are you doing here?"

"Making sure you and the boy make it out of here safely. We need to hurry. Purnia won't be able to hold off Thread's cronies for long."

"What?" The sound of gunshots behind them made her jump and her eyes widened.

"Haymitch!" He threw his arm around her just as she started to turn back.

"You and Peeta need to get out of 12 right now. Soldiers, I'll take it from here. You go help Peacekeeper Purnia." Pickens cast a weary look at his Captain.

"Safe travels to you both," he murmured as he pulled out his gun and ran to join Purnia.

"Brace yourself, Peeta. This is going to hurt." The Victor flung Peeta over his back like a sack of potatoes and Peeta let out a cry of pain. He beckoned for Katniss to follow him and hurried up the platform. Katniss pushed ahead of him to show him their compartment and Haymitch set Peeta down on the bed as gently as he could. Peeta was gritting his teeth and sweating profusely. Katniss immediately started to wipe at his face with a blanket and he curled up on the bed with his head in her lap.

"Duartyr will meet you at the station. Don't speak to anyone else and don't leave this compartment. There are spies everywhere and we don't know who to trust."

"But we trust Duartyr?"

"Yes," Haymitch nodded solemnly. "He's risked his life for Peeta before. He's one we can trust. We messed with the passenger lists so we could throw Thread off but he had people set up and waiting, so he knows you're on this train. He's been ordered to keep you and Peeta from making it to the Capitol. Just stay in here and go straight to Duartyr when you reach the Capitol. Understand?" Katniss stroked Peeta's curls and nodded.

"Haymitch, take care of my family."

"I promised your dad I would get them to 13 safely and that's what I'm going to do. You be careful and watch out for yourself and for him," he gestured to the broken boy in her lap. "I'll see you soon, Katniss."

"Be careful, Haymitch."

"And kid?" Peeta glanced up at him. "I'm really proud of you." Peeta closed his eyes for a moment, finding it too painful to move anything else, before resting his cheek on Katniss's thigh. Haymitch smiled at the young couple before closing the compartment door behind him and jumping off the platform.

The conductor called for last minute passengers and Haymitch's eyes scanned the streets. Purnia was supposed to make the journey as well but she was nowhere to be found. Pickens and Burns were missing too and Haymitch felt his heart plummet. He buried his hands in his pockets and started to walk back to Victor's Village as swiftly as he could. He still needed to pack and make sure everything was ready for tonight. One way or another, the rebellion would begin very soon.

* * *

Prim handed her mother the last vial and Violet set it into the bag with the others. They had been sorting through the herbs, deciding which ones were the most important to take. She hoped she would be able to carry two large bags the whole way. One bag held her clothing and the few heirlooms she possessed, along with the few things of her husband's that she couldn't bear to part with. The other was her medicine bag, with as many supplies as they could carry.

"What do you think 13 is like?" She glanced at her daughter, who looked eager and smiled enthusiastically.

"I imagine it's much like any other district in Panem. The people have jobs to tend to, and there isn't enough food to go around. I can't imagine how they have survived this long without anyone noticing."

"Why did Daddy want Haymitch to take us there?"

"He said you would be safer. He was convinced they would come to our aid. But if they have sat by and let the Capitol kill us for this long, why should they worry about us now?"

"Well maybe that's why Katniss has to get there. So she can show them that we deserved their help and recognition." There was silence as they packed their bags.

"You and Peeta have grown awfully close." Prim frowned.

"Aren't we supposed to get along?"

"You kept calling him big brother. He isn't your brother, Primrose, he's your brother-in-law."

"I know that. I really like him, Mom. He's good to Katniss and he's good to us. What's wrong with us being close?" Violet didn't say anything but Prim watched her mother with narrowed eyes.

"You've been acting weird around the Mellarks." Violet's hands froze over her bag.

"What are you talking about?"

"I noticed it at Rye's and Madge's wedding, but I feel like it's been happening a lot longer. You're just...nervous around them. Especially Mr. Mellark."

"Don't be ridiculous, Primrose. I'm not nervous around them. They're Merchants. We're not. You know how Merchants treat us."

"No," Prim said slowly. "I know how they treat Katniss. You and I have never been treated like that, because we look like Merchants. Your blonde hair and blue eyes keep the snarls and insults away. But Katniss looks just like Daddy… dark hair, dark skin, stormy eyes. Seam. Outsider. Even though half the people in this district look like that. Why don't I have darker skin or darker hair?"

"You take after me," Violet said dismissively.

"You know, in school we learned about dominant and recessive genes. How the father typically has dominant genes, especially the eyes and hair. So technically, I should have Dad's dark hair and grey eyes."

"You're speaking nonsense. I learned from the same science books as you did. Biology is complex, Prim, and both the mother and father pass on the same amount of DNA. You inherited my Merchant genes. Katniss inherited Ash's Seam genes. It's as simple as that." But it was anything but simple to Prim. She now remembered the longing looks Bran Mellark had cast her mother that morning before they had left, and how he had offered to escort them both home after Rye's wedding. He was rarely seen with his wife (though Prim hardly blamed him for that- she knew what a witch Mrs. Mellark was)

"I forbid you from speaking about this again, Primrose. To anyone. Do you understand?" Prim heaved a sigh and plopped her bag onto the kitchen table.

"I think I'm all packed. I'm going to put Buttercup in this bag so I can carry him." Violet looked startled.

"Prim, you can't take a cat to 13."

"Why not? I'm not leaving him behind. I couldn't live with myself."

"Sweetheart," Violet's voice softened. "We will be walking for quite awhile. What if he makes noise and we get caught?"

"I'll keep him quiet! Don't make me leave him, Mom. Please." Violet sighed and glanced down at the cat, who was purring and winding himself around Prim's legs.

"Ask Haymitch when he gets here." She was fairly certain the Victor would tell Prim no and she'd rather Prim be angry with him than with her. But she didn't expect Prim's next question.

"Why do you hate Haymitch so much?" Violet's eyes darted to her daughter.

"What?"

"Why do you hate him so much?"

"We have a long, complicated history."

"Uncomplicate it then."

"Prim," she sighed. "I don't want to go into this right now. We don't get along. End of story."

"That's far from the end. I know you don't like him because you blame him for Dad's death. But there's something else. What is it?"

"Nothing. He was your father's best friend. I tried to like him and I just didn't. He was snarky and crude and it irritated me that Ash spent so much time with him. When I learned about the secret meetings, it didn't surprise me that Haymitch was in on it too. He was probably the one who dragged Ash to the meetings in the first place."

"That's not true," Prim said softly. "Dad was the one who asked Haymitch to go to the meetings. Haymitch had just come home from the Games and was angry about his district partners. Dad had been a part of it long before Haymitch joined."

"And who told you that? Haymitch?"

"Yes," she said sternly. "And I trust him. So I hope you can get over whatever it was that happened between you two and listen to reason. Haymitch is going to get us out of 12. We need to be ready to help Katniss. Are you ready?"

"You don't understand how hard it is to leave, Prim," Violet looked around their sad little house.

"I was born here. I understand. I know you and Dad had some good memories here but it's time for us to make new memories, in a new place, with new freedoms.

I'm ready to live life, Mom. Aren't you? Aren't you tired of the way we have been living?"

"Yes," Violet sighed. "Yes I am. I just need to pack a few things from my room. Heat some of that soup for us for lunch, will you? I'll be right back." Prim tended to the stove while Violet wandered into her room to fetch the last of her things.

* * *

Katniss had called for a cup of tea and had poured a few drops of sleep syrup into it before she helped Peeta drain the whole thing. He slept peacefully with his head in her lap, his arms draped over her legs. She sat with her back against the wall, staring up at the ceiling. They had been traveling for several hours now and there hadn't been any disturbances. She hoped they could make it to the Capitol undetected and it wouldn't take long to get Peeta to the hospital. She had helped him remove his shirt so he would be more comfortable; he complained that the material stuck to his wounds and he agreed to sleep on his stomach so he wouldn't further aggravate his back. Katniss's fingers gently tugged at his golden locks, loving the way the curls clung to her skin. She remembered his hair being much longer, almost hanging in his eyes. She knew Peacekeepers kept it trimmed short, but she hoped he would let his grow out. She could just imagine wrapping her hands in his hair and tugging sharply when they were being intimate. She knew he liked it from the few times she had experimented with gentle pulls. What she could do with a handful of hair.

She scoffed and shook her head, scolding herself for thinking such things. They were riding towards known danger and then they would be joining a revolution. Katniss would be lucky if they were ever intimate again. She watched him sleep, his long eyelashes resting on his fair cheeks. The freckles sprinkled across his nose that she personally found quite adorable (and she'd never used that word in her vocabulary before) and his strong jaw that she longed to trail her tongue across. How could this man incite such a reaction in her, all the time? He was injured for god's sakes, she rolled her eyes. Stop thinking like a school girl. Start thinking like a Mockingjay.

* * *

Katniss had fallen asleep and Peeta couldn't find it in his heart to wake her. He needed to use the restroom though and he wasn't sure how much longer he could hold it. He was surprised he hadn't needed to go before this. Or had he, and someone had helped him when he was unconscious? His cheeks burned at the thought.

And the most embarrassing thing on the list of embarrassing things to do in front of the love of your life would be wetting the bed they were both sleeping on. He used the strength in his arms, surprised that he had any left, to lean up as far as he could.

"Katniss," he whispered, not wanting to startle her. "Katniss!" He sighed and shook his head, moving his hand to her knee.

"Katniss," he whispered louder, shaking her leg.

"Hm?" Her eyes fluttered open and she gasped when she saw him leaning up on his arms.

"Peeta, what are you doing?"

"I'm really sorry to wake you. But um, I really have to use the bathroom and I, uh… I need some help." Katniss blushed but nodded. Of course he would need help. He couldn't walk but she couldn't carry him either.

"Let me, um, go ask the Conductor and see if he has anything we can use."

"If you let me lean on you, I can probably make it down the hall." She didn't think it was a good idea for him to walk and Haymitch had told them to stay in the compartment. But he needed to go and she was determined to help him without embarrassing him further.

"Ok. Here, put your shirt back on." She pulled it over his head, ignoring his wince, and sat beside him on the bed.

"How do you want to do this?"

"Just… pull my arm around your shoulder and see if you can help me sit up. My legs aren't injured, so I should be ok to walk." It took a lot of strength and she grimaced at his gasps of pain. But he managed to sit up and leaned into her side.

"Ok. Let's try this." Katniss stood and wrapped her arm around his waistline, looping her fingers through his belt loop so she wouldn't touch his injuries. He couldn't

stand up straight but he could stand so they hobbled to the door and Katniss asked the attendant to point them in the direction of the bathroom. When she saw how small it was, she bit her lip and turned back to the attendant.

"Do you have a larger bathroom we can use? He's severely injured and we just need a little more room. I can't leave him," she added. The attendant bit his lip.

"Come with me." Peeta squeezed his eyes shut but hobbled along with her towards the back of the train. The attendant unlocked a door and pushed it open.

"It's the crew bathroom but you're welcome to use it, Miss."

"Thank you so much," Katniss nodded gratefully, pulling the door closed and locking it behind them. Peeta glanced at the toilet and exhaled deeply.

"OK, how do you-"

"I think I can manage," he said weakly, reaching toward the wall. She let him go but immediately stepped forward as he started to fall.

"Peeta, let me help you," she said gently.

"Can you…ugh, just unzip my jeans for me and I'll… take care of the rest." Katniss's nimble fingers worked the button and zipper and she pulled at the waistband just a bit to make it easier. When she turned away, attempting to give him some privacy, she heard the sound of liquid hitting the bowl.

"This is so humiliating," he muttered with a pained sigh.

"It's just me," she reminded him while staring at the wall.

"Exactly. It's you. The girl I've been in love with since I was a kid. Helping me pee because I can't fucking stand up on my own. Oh Jesus, I can't reach the bowl to flush."

"I've got it," she said quickly, leaning forward and pressing the handle. Peeta zipped his pants and she helped him wash his hands before they hobbled out of the bathroom and back down the hall. She shot the attendant a grateful smile as she closed the compartment door again. Peeta buried his face in the blanket and sighed loudly. She sat next to him and rested her hand on his arm.

"Peeta, please don't feel embarrassed around me. We've seen each other at our most vulnerable, remember? You've looked at every inch of me. You've touched my skin, you've… put your mouth on places I would never have imagined… you've been inside me! I never… Peeta, I never thought anyone… I didn't think I would ever… ugh, damn it, why can't I actually put two sentences together?" Peeta peered out of the blankets and gave her a weak smile.

"You're doing just fine."

"Just… let me help you, ok? I want to help you. I want to be here for you, the way you always are for me. Don't feel awkward, alright? Can you promise me that?"

"I always feel awkward around you, Katniss," he mumbled. She moved to her stomach and propped her feet up against the wall so that her face was just inches from his. She reached for his hands and he allowed her to intertwine their fingers. She pulled his hand to her lips and cocked her head.

"Why's that?" He leaned up on his elbows, wincing when his back arched.

"I already told you. You were always so beautiful. And you intimidated the hell out of me. If you were at one of my wrestling matches, I would lose all concentration. My brothers constantly teased me about it. When you came into the bakery with your dad, I dropped a whole tray of cookies. Mom hit me as soon as I got back to the kitchen but Dad just smiled at me, knowing what my problem was. Our first Reaping… I couldn't look away from you. I just prayed and prayed that you would be spared. I just… I haven't been able to stop watching you, Katniss." He propped his head on his hand and smiled.

"I used to read about these… dark creatures from mythology. Sirens. Mermaids, really, but sirens were supposedly darker and more mysterious. Their song lured men to their deaths, you see, so it was really dangerous for sailors to pass their home. I used to wonder if you were a siren in disguise. Your song captured me, and we were five, Katniss! Then I started to wonder if you were some kind of witch. A witch who can cast magic spells. How can a five year old cast that powerful of a spell?"

"You make it sound like I'm not even human," she wrinkled her nose and he chuckled. "Maybe you're just really easy to lure."

"I must be, because my little five year old heart is still under your spell, almost fourteen years later. You're the only one who has this kind of power over me."

"So the Capitol should have no effect on you," she gripped both of his hands. His smile faltered and she leaned in close.

"Peeta, I know you're still afraid of your flashbacks. The things they put in your mind. But just remember, when you feel like you're falling apart, my song pulling you back together and back to me. Remember that, ok?" He nodded and kissed her palm.

"Sing to me?" She obliged and he lowered his head to the bed and closed his eyes as her sweet melody surrounded him and lulled him to sleep. His lips curved upwards as she lay her head beside his.

"Thank you, my sweet siren," he mumbled sleepily. She kissed his cheek and pushed his damp hair off his forehead. She knew he was still feverish and silently willed him to stay strong until they reached the Capitol.

"I love you, Peeta," she whispered as she joined him in sleep.

Peeta's heart hammered so loudly that he tried to move his hand to his chest to muffle the sound. It was clear as day, though whispered so softly, he knew she hadn't meant for him to hear it. Like before, she was drifting off to sleep but the first time he had heard her say anything about it, she had used the words "falling in love with you". Now, she just said "I love you". Should he say something back? Should he wake her up and beg for her to say it with her eyes open? Should he lie here and pretend she hadn't said a word?

 _She only said it because she pities you_ , came that voice. He squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head.

No. She loved him. He knew it was true and she had just confirmed it!

 _Then why does she only say it when you're hurt? It's not love she feels, it's pity. She feels sorry for you. Guilty, even. It was her fault after all._

No it wasn't. Neither time was her fault.

 _The first time you were attacked, was because you married a Seam slut. The other men liked you, until you married her._

That is definitely not true, he argued with himself but the cold voice continued as if he hadn't interrupted.

 _The second, you literally traded yourself for her. You took her whipping. And nearly died for it. How is that not her fault?_

Because I chose it! I chose to take her place, because I love her.

 _But she doesn't love you. She just feels obligated to stay with you. Why won't she tell you she loves you when you're awake? Both times, she has been asleep and_

 _she thought you were asleep. It doesn't matter how many times you save her life, she will always see you as a Merchant Peacekeeper, a marriage of convenience. She could never love you._ Peeta covered both of his ears, as if he could block out the voice. But it continued to hiss inside his head and he blinked back tears.

"Please," he whispered. "Please go away."

 _Remember my song pulling you back together and back to me. Remember._

His eyes shot open as he heard her singing in his head. It drowned out the other voice until he could hear nothing but her sweet song. He lay his head back on the bed and closed his eyes again, willing her voice to stay with him and chase away the nightmares.

* * *

When Katniss woke, she ached all over from falling asleep in a weird position. She sat up and lowered her legs to the floor. She rubbed circulation into her knees and twisted her neck, feeling the cramps all over. She reached around for a pillow and gently slid it under Peeta's head, so he could rest comfortably in her lap. He had turned onto his side but kept his back rigid, his legs tucked under him. It didn't look very comfortable after all, but Katniss didn't want to wake him. She felt his forehead and gasped at how hot he felt. She wondered how far they had to go before they reached the Capitol.

When he woke again, she was stroking his hair and humming softly. He blinked several times, wondering if he was still dreaming. He didn't move, for fear she would stop. But he heard voices outside the compartment and she started to move.

"Peeta," she said gently. "I think we've arrived."

"Ok." He tried to sit up but gasped in pain and lowered his face to the blanket.

"Don't try to move. I'll find Duartyr and get some help for you."

"Don't leave me," he gasped, his hand flying to hers.

"I'll be right back," she said soothingly, kissing his forehead. "I promise."

"Katniss-" She pulled her hand away from his and he released what sounded like a sob. She pulled the compartment open and motioned for the attendant to come near.

"Sir, will you please watch over him until I return? We're meeting my uncle and he will have to carry my husband." The attendant peered past her into the compartment and his eyes softened.

"Of course Miss. I'll watch him."

"Thank you. I'll be right back, Peeta."

"Katniss, wait-" He tried to sit up but couldn't and fell forward on his face again. Katniss shoved past people and jumped off the platform, her eyes searching for Duartyr. He rushed toward her, his face shining with worry.

"Where's Peeta?"

"Inside. He can hardly move, General Duartyr." Duartyr jerked his head and two soldiers stepped onto the train.

"Wait. Let me go first. He will freak out when he sees soldiers." Duartyr nodded and Katniss hurried ahead of them, ignoring angry cries from the passengers who were trying to get off the train. Katniss lead them to the compartment and her eyes widened in horror at the sight of Peeta sprawled in the floor.

"Peeta!"

"I'm sorry, Miss. He tried to follow you and wouldn't let me help him," the attendant stammered. Katniss knelt next to her husband and touched his shoulder.

"Oh Peeta," she sighed.

"You left me," he panted.

"I'm right here. Look, General Duartyr is here and he is going to help."

"Look at me, Peeta," Duartyr knelt in front of his soldier. Peeta's eyes were glazed, his face pale, and it was clear he was holding back tears. Duartyr hated seeing him in such pain.

"We are going to get you out onto the platform and then into my car, alright? Are you ready?"

"Katniss?"

"She's right beside you, Peeta," he said gently. Katniss reached for his hand and squeezed.

"Soldiers, help the Captain to his feet. Try not to touch his back or jostle him too much."

"Yes sir." The Peacekeepers crouched low and allowed Peeta to drape his arms over their shoulders. Katniss grabbed their bags and stood in front of him so he could clearly see her.

"Mrs. Mellark, allow me to help you with those," Duartyr took two of the bags and slung them over his shoulder. He lead the way off the train and straight to a large black car. He sidled up to Katniss and his lips barely moved when he spoke again.

"Get into the car immediately. Don't look around you, just look straight ahead." She did as she was told and jumped into the back seat. Duartyr tossed the bags into the trunk while the two soldiers helped Peeta into the back seat beside Katniss. She pulled him in and helped him stretch out so his head was resting in her lap.

"I don't feel so good," he muttered, hiding his face in her leg.

"I know. Just stay with me. We will be there soon." Katniss took notice that Duartyr wasn't driving and she frowned at the driver.

"Who's he?"

"A friend," Duartyr said quickly. "Let's go, Alex."

"Home, sir?"

"Wait, home? He needs a hospital."

"I have medical care waiting at my apartment. We can't risk checking him into a hospital, Katniss. There is too much going on right now. He will be safest at my place." Katniss's brow furrowed and she glanced at her husband.

"He's not doing well, Felix."

"The doctor is an old friend of mine. He will take good care of Peeta, I promise." Katniss fell silent as they drove through the city but this time her eyes weren't locked on the windows and the passing sights; they were locked on her husband, silently pleading for him to stay with her.

* * *

He was much worse by the time the car had pulled in front of the large Capitol house. He was shaking and had sweat through his shirt. Katniss pushed his damp hair off his forehead and chewed her lip.

"We're here, Peeta. Just hold on." He tried to focus on her but his eyes rolled to the back of his head and he choked back a gasp.

"I've got him," Duartyr said at her side, gently pulling Peeta up and draping him over his shoulder as Haymitch had done. The driver helped Katniss with the bags and they followed Duartyr inside the house.

"Doctor Everett," Duartyr called as he made his way toward the stairs. "Doctor Everett, quickly!"

"Bring him in here," the doctor appeared out of nowhere, making Katniss jump. She followed the men into the room and watched with wide eyes as Duartyr placed Peeta on the bed. Duartyr was able to easily maneuver the bed around so that the doctor could have easy access to his patient. The doctor had two assistants who were placing various tools on a tray.

"I need everyone out please," the doctor said, opening his bag. Duartyr wrapped his arm around Katniss but she dug her heels into the ground at the sound of her husband's cry.

"Katniss!"

"Peeta, I'm right here."

"Katniss!" Peeta thrashed around on the bed and the doctor huffed.

"Restrain him!"

"No! Don't!" She rushed forward but was blocked by the driver.

"Get out of my way!"

"Doctor Everett, please allow his wife to stay with him. He will panic without her." The doctor fixed his violet eyes upon Katniss.

"Make him stay still." She nodded and hurried toward him.

"Hey," she said softly, kneeling in front of him and squeezing his hand. "You're going to be ok. I'm right here."

"Katniss," he squeezed his eyes shut, blinking back tears. "Don't leave me."

"I'm not. I'm staying right here. Right by your side." Doctor Everett moved around her and pressed a thick needle into Peeta's vein. His eyes started to flutter and Katniss squeezed his hand again.

"Don't leave me," he whispered, his head falling forward.

"Mrs. Mellark, I need you to leave the room, please. I promise to fetch you when he wakes. But I am going to need the area clear to operate. These wounds run deep and I need to work quickly." Katniss nodded but couldn't move. The doctor patted her shoulder.

"Your husband will be alright. I will let you know when I am finished."

"Come along, Katniss," Duartyr murmured, tugging Katniss from the room. The door closed but there was a window big enough to peer through. She watched as the doctor and his assistants moved around Peeta, working quickly to heal his injuries and erase any signs of infection. Katniss didn't realize she was crying until she tasted salt on her lip. She impatiently wiped at her face and watched the doctor work.

"Katniss," Duartyr said gently, pulling her into the living room. He told her to rest while he made her some tea.

"We just need to let the doctor work," he said as he sat across from her. "Doctor Everett is one of the best in his field. He's even helped Peeta before."

"It's so unfair, Felix," she said as she stared into her cup. "He didn't have to be tortured like that. It wasn't supposed to be him."

"Please don't take this the wrong way, Katniss, but you would not have survived such an ordeal. Peeta is strong and his training has made him stronger. He knew he could take the pain whereas you… ten lashes would have left you paralyzed, my dear. Twenty would have killed you. I know the soldiers who Thread has appointed. He did what he had to do. He swore when he joined the rebellion that he would lay down his life for the Mockingjay. Nevermind that you are the love of his life and he would do anything to protect you anyway, rebellion or no."

"Is it safe here? I mean, to talk about-"

"Oh this house is quite safe, I assure you. I had a Victor from 3 inspect it thoroughly and he found no signs of bugs or tampering with. It has been a safe house for some time now." Katniss's eyes darted around the room.

"Is this where you kept Peeta while he was recovering from the poison?" Duartyr sipped at his tea.

"Yes. I hid him in this very house for several months. Other soldiers just thought I had assigned him to another district. We had to keep him restrained for a time. He was angry with everyone. He threw things. He raged for days. He was a little calmer when his brother visited but we had to be careful. I know we were being watched."

"So what is happening now? Why would Thread order Peacekeepers to beat their own Captain? And why-"

"You have to be exhausted, dear," he cut her off. "Why don't we talk later and you get some rest while you can? I've arranged for the guest room to be ready for you." Katniss wanted to argue but she could barely keep her eyes open. He showed her where they would be staying and their bags had already been left there.

"You'll wake me as soon as the doctor is finished?"

"I promise," Duartyr's hand rested on his heart and he bowed his head. Katniss nodded in thanks and fell onto the bed. She didn't even take her shoes off; as soon as her head hit the pillow, she was fast asleep.


	45. Chapter 45

She heard his pleading cries in her dreams and she tossed and turned the entire time. Images of his bloody, broken body filled her mind and she woke with tears streaming down her cheeks. She collapsed on her back and ran her fingers through her hair as she stared at the ceiling. She jumped off the bed and hurried over to their bags. Rifling through, she pulled out one of Peeta's shirts and brought it to her face. Yep. There it was. His sweet scent of cinnamon and dill as if his very sweat was sweet. She inhaled his scent, closing her eyes and pretending she was burying her face in his chest. She could feel his strong arms close around her, his heart race beneath her cheek. When she opened her eyes again, she was alone in the room, clinging to a piece of fabric. She slumped forward and groaned. She pulled her shirt off and replaced it with his. She buttoned it up and rolled the sleeves up, smiling when she saw how it engulfed her.

There was a soft knock at the door and she nearly tripped in her haste to answer it. Duartyr smiled as she yanked the door open.

"I thought you should know, Doctor Everett is finished and leaving Peeta to rest. I thought you would like to be with him." She nodded eagerly and followed him back to Peeta's room. The doctor gave her a kind smile as he passed, clutching his medical bag. Peeta was sleeping on his stomach, his back covered in strips of material that smelled as if they had been soaked in some kind of medicine. His chin rested on his hand and he was dressed in a loose pair of grey pants. Katniss pulled a chair over to his bed and brought his hand to her face.

"I'll give you two some privacy," Duartyr whispered. "Alert me if you need anything." She nodded but didn't take her eyes off of her husband. He looked a hundred times better. She couldn't see his back under all the material but his cheeks had returned to a normal color and he looked to be sleeping peacefully. She rubbed her cheek against the back of his hand and sighed. His eyes fluttered slightly but he remained asleep. Katniss rested her elbow on the bed and leaned her head against her hand. Before she knew it, she was asleep again. His presence kept the nightmares away and she had no idea how long she had slept. When she opened her eyes, however, he was gone.

Her head shot up and her hands searched the empty space. The bed was empty in front of her and she jumped to her feet.

"Whoa, easy," a voice said behind her and she whirled around. Peeta was sitting in the armchair, his legs crossed as he ate something from a bowl. He watched her with a raised brow.

"You ok?"

"Am I- Peeta! You're sitting up!"

"Oh… yeah, I am. I mean, Doc fixed me right up."

"You're telling lies, Peeta," Duartyr scolded as he entered the room with another bowl in his hands. "Doctor Everett said you are better but you need to put the medicine on your back every 6 hours."

"OK fine, every 6 hours. But I hardly feel anything at all, Katniss. It's amazing."

"I made some stew," Duaryr handed Katniss the bowl, which she accepted with a grateful nod. Katniss took a spoonful but set it down to go inspect Peeta's back. She gasped when she saw how the wounds were closed and looked weeks old rather than just days. There would definitely be scars, she knew, but she was stunned at how well the doctor had done. If medicine and technology were this easy in the districts, their population wouldn't be dwindling. She reached out to touch his shoulder and he pulled her hand around to his lips.

"See? I'm just fine, love. Better than fine."

"You should finish your dinner and then sleep, Peeta."

"I've slept for nearly 30 hours, Felix," he said in exasperation. "I'm healed."

"You know how this works. On the surface it can look great but there is still deep hurt underneath."

"We need to talk about the rebellion," Peeta argued. "And the evacuation of 12. And what about-"

"Peeta," Duartyr said firmly. "You and Katniss have been through a lot. I want you to rest tonight and tomorrow, we will talk about what is happening. Alright? I'm still your General, Captain Mellark." Peeta scoffed.

"Yes General." Duartyr nodded and left the room. Peeta rolled his eyes but finished his stew. Katniss ate quickly and Peeta pulled her onto his lap.

"I was kind of out of it most of the time but I'm pretty sure you were the best caregiver anyone could possibly have." She smiled as he pushed a strand of her hair behind her ear.

"Not really. I just made you as comfortable as I could."

"Thank you." His thumb traveled over her lip and her tongue followed. His eyes darkened as she wet her lips and his hands moved to her hips.

"I know I was still really out of it… but I heard you say something important on the train." She frowned but her eyes widened in realization. Peeta cocked his head and wrapped his arms around her.

"Should I pretend I didn't hear it?" She sucked in a breath as he watched her anxiously.

"No," she whispered. "You don't have to pretend."

"Then you wanted me to hear it?"

"I…" His hand moved up and down her back before slipping under the shirt. His palm against her warm skin made her eyes flutter shut.

"Did you mean it?" She opened her eyes again and nodded.

"I meant it. I can't lose you, Peeta. Ever."

"You won't," he promised her. "I'm right here." He slipped both hands under her shirt and traveled down her spine.

"This is my shirt."

"You want it back?" He grinned and shook his head.

"It looks better on you." She leaned back slightly.

"You want me to show you where we're sleeping?"

"Yeah. It's been hell trying to sleep without you in my arms the past few nights."

"I know the feeling," she muttered, tugging on his hand. She lead him to the guest room Duartyr had showed her to and Peeta closed the door behind them. He glanced at the bed and Katniss leaned against the wall.

"Are you tired?"

"Like I said, I've done nothing but sleep. I just devoured two bowls of stew and have so much energy right now."

"Well that's not fair, I've spent the past few days losing sleep, worrying over you," she said with a small smile. He moved toward her and tugged her by the waist.

"You never left my side," he muttered, running his other hand through her hair. "And I love you for that." He lowered his lips to hers and she released a needy little whine as his tongue raked across her bottom lip.

"Is this ok," she asked as he ground his hips against her. "You were so close to death and now-"

"Now I'm fully healed and desperate for you." She shook her head and backed up toward the bed but he followed her down and caged her in his arms.

"We can't," she insisted as his tongue raked down her throat. "I don't want to risk hurting you."

"Katniss, I'm telling you, I don't feel anything. If it would make you feel better, I can hold your wrists down so you don't touch my back." He didn't miss the way her eyes darkened and the sensual way she bit her lip. His lips curved into a smirk as he lowered his head to trail his tongue along her ear.

"So that turns you on, does it? Should I tie you to the bed? Have my way with you?" She squirmed underneath him and he chuckled softly in her ear.

"Interesting. I wouldn't have thought my strong Mockingjay would be submissive in bed." He gathered her wrists in his hand and pulled them over her head. She gasped as he pressed them into the bed and he hovered over her, his eyes glittering.

"Keep them there," he grunted as he reached down to cup her center. Her legs fell open and he hooked his thumbs in the waistband and tugged. She lifted her hips, her hands still twisted in the sheet over her head. Peeta gave her a smile as he bent to kiss her ankle, placing tender kisses along her leg and thigh. She gripped the sheets tightly as he came closer and closer to where she needed him the most, her hips jerking up toward his face. When he skipped over her pelvis and placed a kiss on her stomach, she growled and he snickered, knowing exactly what he was doing. She moved her hands to his hair and he pushed them back down again.

"Stay still," he told her in a low voice. She nodded and watched him trail his lips across her belly before he pulled her up.

"You know, I think I do want my shirt back after all." He smirked as he worked the buttons and pushed it down her arms. Her nipples strained against her bra, and Peeta's roughened palm flattened against her left breast before tweaking her peak between his fingers. She released a cry and bit her lip as she realized they weren't alone in the house. His eyes lit up as he bent to take her breast into his mouth.

"This should be fun," he muttered. "Think you can stay quiet while I kiss every inch of your flesh?" He didn't wait for an answer before he pulled the bra off and moved to her other breast. She fell backwards onto the pillows and he climbed over her, pulling her hands over her head again. Keeping one hand around her wrists, he bent low to suck at her neck and she whined against his shoulder. His other hand moved to her center again and he audibly groaned and dropped his forehead against her chest.

"Holy fuck, Katniss, you are so wet right now." She was so desperate for him that she didn't have the capacity to feel embarrassed about the sounds coming from below as he plunged his fingers in and out of her. Peeta was torn as he hovered over her; he wanted her to cum quickly but he also wanted to drive her crazy with his tongue until she was quivering with pent up desire. He pulled his fingers from between her thighs and wrapped his tongue around his digits, his eyes slamming shut at her familiar taste. Katniss bit her lip, her hands moving to grip his shoulders before he slammed her hands back down and bent low, his face inches from hers.

"You just can't follow orders, can you?"

"I'm not the follow orders type of girl," she said haughtily. Peeta grinned and hopped off the bed. He rifled through his bag until he found what he was looking for, and pushed his sweat pants down his legs before returning to her side. She groaned when she realized he hadn't been wearing underwear and was now kneeling beside her, naked and hard. He leaned over her as he bound her wrists with a tie, his eyes finding hers.

"Keep them there," he murmured, making her shiver with how husky his voice had become. He gripped her hips as he moved between her legs, kneeing them further apart before pulling her panties down around her ankles. Katniss watched him take her all in and it was endearing that no matter how many times they did this, he acted as if he was just seeing her for the first time. He gazed at her with such longing and adoration that she felt her heart speed up even more. Peeta gave her a wink before lowering to his knees and tugging her to the end of the bed. She wanted to wrap her fingers around his curls but she dutifully kept them above her head as his tongue flicked across her clit.

"Peeta," she whined, turning her head so she could moan into the pillow. He spread her even wider, his thumbs holding her open so he could plunge his tongue deep inside her. Her back arched off the bed as her body started to shake uncontrollably. He moved back up to hold her so she could stifle her cries against his chest, his arms wrapping around her until her tremors subsided. He pulled the tie off and she wrapped her arms around his waist as she panted against his skin. After a few moments, she pulled him over her and gripped his erection in her fist.

"Get a condom from your bag," she mumbled and he leaped across the room, his bare ass flashing in the moonlight. Katniss stifled a giggle as she waited impatiently, tapping her fingers against the sheets. Peeta looked back at her, his smile faltering.

"I think we've used them all. I had planned to get more but…" he trailed off, shaking his head and throwing his bag aside. Katniss chewed on her lip as she motioned

for him to come back to her and he obeyed, lying beside her.

"It's ok," he whispered. "We don't have to do anything else. I just wanted to get you off, to remind myself that you're here with me." She leaned up to kiss him and tugged at his shoulders.

"We don't need one." His eyes widened and his jaw dropped.

"I mean, we can just… uh, you can… you know."

"I'll pull out," he nodded, moving to his knees. "Are you sure though?"

"Yes," she said firmly, her palms running over his chest. His hand shook as he guided himself inside her and he squeezed his eyes shut as he felt her wet walls clamp down on him for the first time. "Yes!"

"Oh fuck," he whimpered. "Katniss, you feel… oh god, I'm not going to last long. I'm sorry. You're just-"

"It's ok," she said soothingly, pushing his hair out of his eyes. "You feel so good inside me." She reached up to touch his face and he captured her wrists with both hands and pushed them down into the bed. He rose up and increased his thrusts, her hands on either side of her head. She sucked in a breath as she gazed up at him, his strong chest heaving with the effort of holding her down and moving at a rapid pace.

"Katniss," he gritted his teeth. "Please tell me you're close. I can't hold on much longer."

"I am," she moaned. "Oh Peeta!"

"Oh my god!" He pulled out of her suddenly, his cum spurting across her hip in thick pearly drops. He gripped her hip with one hand, his chin lowered as he tried to catch his breath. She started to sit up but he pushed two fingers inside her, curving them upwards and grunting when he felt her walls contract. She clapped a hand over her mouth as she let out a scream.

"God I wish it was my dick you were squeezing like this right now. One day I want to feel you cum around me like you're cumming on my fingers." He thumbed her clit, determined that she would be a giant puddle of incoherent mess when he was finished with her.

"Fuck you're still cumming. And you're soaking my hand. That's it my love, I've got you. Cum for me." When she couldn't take anymore, she reached down to grip his wrist. His actions slowed until he had coaxed the last remnants of her orgasm from her, allowing her limp form to fall to the bed. Her limbs felt like jelly and she was sure she wouldn't be able to move until morning. Peeta curled up beside her and kissed her temple, breathing against her hair.

"I have no words to express how amazing that was."

"Mmm," was all she could say in return. She was starting to nod off when she suddenly sat straight up, making him jump.

"Your medicine!"

"Every 6 hours," he said gently. "I'll be fine."

"How do you feel? Did we… you're not sore?" He smiled and stroked her cheek, pressing his forehead to hers.

"No love. I feel wonderful. Floating on cloud nine, in fact. I have an alarm set to put more medicine on my back," he indicated a device on his wrist. "So let's get some sleep, ok?" She nodded and allowed him to pull her into his chest.

* * *

When the alarm on his wrist started to beep, Katniss sat up and pushed her hair out of her eyes. Peeta continued to sleep beside her and she grunted as the alarm got louder.

"Peeta," she gently shook him and he groaned.

"Come on, time to put some medicine on your back."

"Let's just do it in the morning," he hid his head under the pillow.

"Absolutely not. We are obeying the doctor's orders. Go get the medicine so I can help you." He growled and threw the pillow across the bed, hurrying over to pull on a pair of underwear from his bag and the soft grey pants he was wearing.

"I left it in the other room. Be right back." She nodded and he opened the door, wincing when it creaked loudly. He hurried down the hall and found the medicine where the doctor had left it on the vanity. He cradled it closely as he walked back to the guest room but paused when he saw a flood of light coming from under another door. It was nearly three in the morning, who was awake and why? He leaned in close, already scolding himself for eavesdropping.

"You don't seem to understand what I am saying. The President is close to death and we still have no idea who poisoned him. Nor has he chosen a successor. I do not like the fact that Captain Mellark and the Mockingjay are in the Capitol. They are in danger every minute they stay here." Peeta's grip on the bowl tightened. He heard a loud thud, as if Duartyr had slammed his hand against something.

"Listen to me, Colonel. Peeta nearly died today. Thread knew exactly what he was doing, arresting Katniss. He knew Peeta would volunteer for her. It was a surefire way to get rid of him. Thread is following someone else's orders and they are calculated and clever. Minister Antonius is still missing, so he is either dead or is a traitor. We NEED to get Katniss and Peeta to 13, now. You need to tell your president she must send a hovercraft. We can't risk sending them by train or by car. You want your Mockingjay safe and sound? You need to come get her out of the Capitol. Today." Peeta waited while whoever Duartyr was speaking to replied.

"Good. I'm glad we have an understanding. I'll make sure they are ready. Send me the details of the extraction as soon as you can. Yes, Plutarch Heavensbee will make arrangements. Thank you, Colonel. Good night." Peeta backed away from the door and ran back to the guest room. Katniss was still under the sheet and he could see she hadn't dressed. Focus Mellark, he gritted his teeth.

"Are you ok?" She could immediately tell he wasn't.

"Yeah, fine," he grunted as he closed the door. She sat up, clutching the sheet to her chest.

"Don't lie to me."

"I just heard Felix talking to someone. They're sending a hovercraft to get us later on today."

"Who? 13?" Peeta nodded as he set the bowl of medicine down.

"Well… you're better. There's no reason you can't go with me now."

"I don't plan on letting you out of my sight," he reached over and stroked her cheek with his knuckle.

"Let me put a shirt on so I can help you with that."

"Clothes aren't necessary to take care of me," he said with a grin as he leaned over to pull the sheet down. She scoffed but allowed him to worship her neck with his tongue.

"You're impossible," she said breathily.

"I've been head over heels for you since I was a kid. Can you blame me for touching you whenever I want, simply because I can?"

"OK loverboy, lie on your stomach for me. Did he say how long we need to leave it on?"

"Just to let it soak for a few minutes," he mumbled as he stretched out in front of her, pulling the pillow toward him.

"Ok." The strips of material were soaking in the medicine, so she lifted one from the bowl and lay it across his back. He drew a sharp breath and she froze.

"Peeta?"

"I'm fine."

"Does it hurt?"

"I won't lie. It burns like hell. But that means it's working. Keep going." Chewing her lip, she lay the strips across his back, wincing at his small gasps of pain. When his entire back was covered, she leaned down to kiss the back of his neck.

"We'll let the medicine do its job and then I'll take them off. Can I get you anything?" He reached up and grasped her hand.

"Just stay with me." She squeezed.

"I'm not going anywhere."

* * *

Peeta's back was stinging when he woke up but he forced his face into a neutral face so Katniss wouldn't know he was in pain. Besides, if he had been as close to death as Duartyr had said, he was pretty damn lucky. If he had stayed in 12, he would have surely died. He pushed the covers aside and leaned down to kiss his wife's shoulder. The sun streamed into the window and danced across her delectable skin. She moaned and turned over onto her back, smiling sleepily up at him.

"Morning beautiful."

"Morning. How are you feeling?"

"I woke up next to the most perfect creature on the planet. How could I feel anything other than content?" She rolled her eyes and sat up to inspect his back.

"Looks even better today. Guess that medicine really does work."

"Let's get dressed so we can talk to Felix."

* * *

Peeta did not hide the fact that he had eavesdropped from his general. Duartyr sighed and nodded.

"I suppose it is better that you know everything. There are some who said you only need to know certain details but I think being kept in the dark will do more harm than good."

"So what is happening? Is the Minister still missing?"

"Yes, and President Snow is dying from a slow poison."

"Wait, what?!" Katniss jumped up from her seat.

"We don't know who has done it, although we have our suspicions."

"Caius," Peeta said immediately. "He's next in line. It only makes sense."

"Except that Snow hasn't chosen a successor," Duartyr shrugged. "Apparently there was some family drama some time ago and the President called for his advisors and lawyers. He wanted to change some things in his final wishes and he stated that he did not want his son to become President. But when urged to choose someone, he couldn't name anyone. Some people say he wants his granddaughter to take his place."

"She's only sixteen," Peeta said in horror. "How can a sixteen year old protect a country?"

"Well, it was done thousands of years ago. Many rulers were early teenagers when they ascended the throne. But Aurelia is Caius's only child, so he will do everything to sway the advisors to support him. And I'm telling you, we do not want Caius Snow to hold that title. If you thought Coriolanus was bad, Caius is twice as bloodthirsty and depraved."

"Yeah, I got a sense of that when he was introducing us to his new tv program," Peeta snarled in disgust. Katniss gripped her hair as she started to pace back and forth. Peeta glanced up at her and sighed.

"What does Coin think of all of this?"

"She wants to proceed as though nothing has changed. She has enlisted Plutarch Heavensbee to coach Katniss on how to film a propaganda video. Propos, he likes to call them. It is how our former Mockingjay got his messages out to Panem." Katniss froze.

"I have to appear on screen, for the whole country to see and hear?"

"You are the Mockingjay, Katniss," he said patiently. "The people need to hear your message. They need to hear about your family, how you lived for so many years, what they did to your father. That is what will call people to stand up against the Capitol."

"This should be Peeta," she shook her head desperately. "He's a better speaker and he's charming and knows how to deal with crowds. He should be the Mockingjay."

"Katniss, you are the Mockingjay," her husband said as he jumped to his feet. "The country loved and respected your father. Now they will love and respect you.

They'll look to you to lead them."

"I don't want anyone looking to me," she exclaimed. "I can't help them! All I want to do is keep my family alive!"

"They very nearly killed your husband, Katniss," Duartyr stood up too. Peeta threw him a look but his general ignored it. "Your sister has three more years of Reapings. Don't you want it all to stop? Don't you want to give the country, your district, a new chance at life?" Peeta brushed past Duartyr and grasped Katniss's hands in his.

"We all believe in you," he said earnestly. "I know you can do this. And just think about the rewards waiting for all of us. Prim can study medicine and can travel, or she can settle down with someone she loves- she can do whatever she wants to do. Your mother can be a real doctor, not just a healer with limited resources. And I'll take you wherever you want to go, until you've seen enough of the world that you want to settle down in a nice little house. And we can fill it with babies that will grow up in a world so completely different from the one we know now. A world where they'll go to bed with food in their stomachs and they won't have to get jobs when they are young, they can have an actual childhood. And they won't ever have to worry about having their names in a bowl, and we won't ever have to worry about seeing them on a screen. You can give us that, Katniss. All of it and more."

"What about the dangers, Peeta? The risks? The sacrifices we will have to make?"

"There's risk in everything we do. We risk death as soon as we wake up but that doesn't keep us from leaving our beds in the morning. It just makes life more valuable." She looked into his eyes and found that despite her fear, she felt calm and grounded.

"Fine. I'll film their propo videos. Is 13 getting us out of the Capitol today?" She turned back to Duartyr.

"I'm waiting for more details but yes, you'll be under the protection of Colonel Boggs, President Coin's second-in-command. I told them it is vital to get you out of the Capitol as soon as possible."

"Won't Headquarters be alerted that I'm here? You once told me the Peacekeeper higher ups can rarely go anywhere without being tracked."

"Haymitch put Ryen's and Madge's names on the passenger list. It will throw them off temporarily but Thread surely knows that you will come here for healing. If he's working for someone here, they will be looking for you. That's why I said we couldn't take you to the hospital." Peeta stretched his arms and winced slightly. Katniss's eyes narrowed and he shook his head.

"I'm fine," he said dismissively.

"That medicine has done wonders but you have to keep applying it for it to work."

"We have been. Katniss helped me last night. Or this morning, rather."

"Good. I need to make a few calls and you should both make sure you are all packed and ready to go. I'll be in my study, should you need anything." He bowed slightly to Katniss, which took her aback, before shutting himself in the next room.

"Better do as he says. Is all of our stuff in that room?"

"Should be. I didn't unpack anything except some clothes." He grasped her hand as they headed into the guest room, making sure all of their belongings were packed securely.

* * *

They sat on the bed together, Katniss resting her head on his shoulder while Peeta's thumb gently rubbed the top of her hand. Their bags were lined against the wall as they waited with baited breath for their next move.

Duartyr knocked at the door and Peeta jumped to his feet.

"We have a slight problem."

"General?" Katniss noticed Duartyr was donning his official Peacekeeper uniform and she frowned.

"What's happened, Felix?"

"Peeta and I have been summoned to speak to President Snow." Peeta's jaw fell open.

"I thought he was close to death."

"He is. That's why he's requesting to speak to his Head Peacekeepers. It seems that he has declared Thread a traitor and has made you Head Peacekeeper of District 12. General Mellark." Peeta turned back to Katniss and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Shit," he said softly.


	46. Chapter 46

"Peeta, you can't go," she clung to his hand. "What if it's a trap?"

"I have to, Katniss. It's a direct order from the President. And he will be well protected. I'll be fine."

"I have a bad feeling about this," she said, blinking back tears. "Felix can go for both of you and we can be ready to run when 13 arrives."

"13 still has to get past the Capitol's airfields, Katniss," Duartyr said anxiously. "I don't know how they are going to pull it off in broad daylight. I can go provide a distraction but if the Capitol sees 13 insignia, they won't hesitate to blast them out of the sky. I told the Colonel that last night but he said he would take care of it. I don't know how but I'll trust a military man, I suppose. Still, Peeta can't disobey orders. Not while the President is still alive."

"How did he even know Peeta was in the Capitol? Something doesn't feel right here!"

"Plutarch informed him that Peeta was alive. He will have his guards with him. We will answer our summons and then we will return here immediately. If we aren't back in time, I'll make sure Peeta has access to a hovercraft and he will join you in 13."

"I'm not leaving here without you," she ignored Duartyr completely. Her eyes locked on his and they were tossing storms. Peeta swallowed deeply as she gripped his hands tightly.

"Do you hear me? I won't leave the Capitol without you. They'll have to drug me and knock me out first."

"Be reasonable, Katniss," Duartyr said sternly. "You are the Mockingjay. Peeta is one of your soldiers. We have sworn to protect you above all else." Katniss turned and fixed him with a cold glare.

"Sweetheart, I'll be fine," Peeta said placatingly. "Just stay here and I'll be back soon." He hastily pulled one of his uniforms out of his bag and pulled it on over his clothes. Duartyr nodded to Katniss before crossing the room and picking up two rifles.

"After today," Peeta cupped her chin. "You won't have to see this uniform on me ever again."

"Be careful," she barely moved her lips but he'd heard. He leaned in to kiss her, his hand going to her hair.

"I love you," he whispered against her forehead before his lips left a sweet kiss and then he was gone. Katniss watched the Peacekeepers disappear through the door and she was alone in the house. She felt antsy and anxious, having no idea what to do to pass the time. She had no clue when the hovercraft from 13 would be there, nor when Peeta would be back. She crawled onto the bed and pulled a pillow toward her, closing her eyes and allowing herself to believe that he was still in the bed with her, holding her tightly.

* * *

"Do you think Katniss could be right, sir?" Peeta clutched his rifle as they entered mansion. "Could this be a trap?"

"President Snow is still the acting ruler. As long as he's alive, we are still the President's Guard. I don't know why he is summoning us but just stay alert and we will be out of here shortly, alright?" Peeta nodded, his mind racing. Peacekeepers saluted them as they passed and Duartyr stopped at the desk to address Snow's secretary.

"Egeria, we need to speak to President Snow, please."

"He's waiting for you, General. As is the Minister." Duartyr froze.

"Minister Antonius? He's here?" Egeria nodded, looking politely confused.

"Go right in, sir." Duartyr glanced at Peeta before he lead the way into Snow's chambers.

* * *

Minister Antonius stood by the President's bed, while the President himself was perched on top of the sheets. His face was completely bloodless, so that Peeta felt like he was looking at a corpse. His lips were blood-stained as if he had been drinking the stuff, and his hair was falling out in clumps. Peeta heard something rattling in the old man's chest as if his very heart was trying to escape. Ironic, he thought, as he had spent so long thinking the man didn't have a heart.

"Generals," Snow said slowly, as he attempted to breathe.

"President Snow, sir," Duartyr bowed his head. "How are you feeling?"

"Like I am on death's doorstep, General Duartyr, but that is neither here nor there. I asked to see you both because I only trust a few, and I count you both among those few. I must first inquire about your wife, General Mellark. How is she?"

"I claimed her charges as my own, sir. She is fine, for now. I on the other hand nearly died at the hands of Romulus Thread."

"Do you hear that, Antonius? What do you have to say to General Mellark?"

"Romulus Thread has been stripped of his title, General Mellark. You will now carry out the duties of Head Peacekeeper as well as earn an increase in your status. As General, you will be granted more of a stipend and your wife will have a title as well. Congratulations." Peeta couldn't help but notice how strained Antonius's smile was.

"Thank you for this honor sir," Peeta bowed his head. Snow had a coughing fit into a handkerchief and when he lowered it, Peeta saw it was stained with red.

"I haven't a lot of time, gentlemen. We have traitors in our midst. General Mellark, I am pleased to see our Capitol medicine has healed your injuries. Antonius, I have forgiven your transgressions. For now. Don't fail me or my family again. You will look after my granddaughter and inform her of what I have told you. Now then, Generals-" Snow trailed off with a gasp as wires were suddenly yanked from his nose and mouth. Duartyr and Peeta moved forward, uncertain, as Snow flopped around the bed like a fish out of water. The machine by his bed emitted a loud beep and Snow fell back onto the pillow, his eyes wide. Duartyr and Peeta gaped at the old man in horror but Antonius looked remarkably calm.

"What a tragic morning this is," he said slowly, shaking his head. Duartyr's wide eyes rested on the Minister.

"What-?" He clamped his jaw shut as someone emerged from the shadows, an evil grin spreading across his pale face. Peeta took a step back as the figure flung the medical wires on top of his dead father.

"You saw it with your own eyes, Minister Antonius," Caius Snow spat. "They murdered the president."

"What? That's madness!"

"Guards," Antonius called as Peeta and Duartyr backed up against the wall. "Guards, the President has been murdered!" Peacekeepers burst through the doors, aiming their guns at Peeta and Duartyr.

"They murdered my father," Caius cried dramatically. "Arrest them!"

"Stand down," Duartyr said angrily. "General Mellark and I are innocent!"

"Innocent," Caius scoffed. "Minister Antonius, what do you say to the General's claims?"

"Arrest General Mellark and General Duartyr and take them to the holding cells. They will stand trial for the assassination of President Coriolanus Snow."

"Get your hands off me," Peeta snarled as three men wrestled him to the ground.

"Subdue him if necessary," Antonius called after the peacekeepers.

"Minister, we've just received word of an unknown hovercraft approaching from the east. District 2 insignia."

"District 2, eh?" Antonius locked eyes with Peeta and he smiled a wicked smile.

"We have no current flight plans for District 2. But you may allow them to land." The Peacekeeper nodded and Antonius cleared his throat.

"Track its landing site. When they take off again… shoot it down."

"No," Peeta cried in anguish, fighting against the hands that held him down.

"It seems that the traitor Mellark knows something we don't," Caius jeered. "Take him to the Laboratory instead. We may have a better use for him, after all." It took five soldiers to tug Peeta to his feet and one jerked his head back, leaving his throat exposed. Antonius fingered a thick gold blade and glanced at Peeta.

"I must wonder, General, where is Mrs. Mellark? Did she travel with you to the Capitol, or is she still in District 12?" Peeta remained silent, his blue eyes icy cold.

Antonius jerked his chin.

"Take him away." He and Caius exchanged smirks as the two generals were dragged away, kicking and cursing and swearing their innocence. Caius glanced at his father, his smirk widening, before he turned and exited the President's chambers.

* * *

Katniss jumped as the holo in the living room came on by itself.

"What the-" she looked both ways before approaching the screen, looking wary. The banner underneath the Capitol woman was flashing red. URGENT. DEATH OF PRESIDENT SNOW. ASSASSINS ARRESTED AND CHARGED WITH TREASON AND MURDER.

"Oh my god," Katniss released a sob as two pictures popped up on the screen. She didn't hear the woman speak but she knew them both. Her husband's expression was calm but full of silent rage.

ASSASSINS WILL BE PUT TO DEATH IMMEDIATELY.

"NO!" Katniss clawed at the screen frantically, screaming Peeta's name. She didn't register a hand close around her arm.

"Katniss, let's go." She jerked her arm out of the person's grasp and sank to her knees.

"We don't have much time. Can you carry her, Odair?"

"Yes sir. Check the bedroom for her belongings. Katniss? Can you hear me? It's Finnick. Finnick Odair." She shook her head as he pulled her to her glanced at the holo and cleared his throat.

"Colonel, we can't leave her husband behind. We have to-"

"We don't have the means to rescue him at this time, Soldier. Grab the Mockingjay and let's get out of here." Finnick sighed and hoisted Katniss in his arms. She immediately flew into a frenzy, hitting and kicking him as hard as she could. He grunted in pain and nearly dropped her as he hurried outside.

"I need a hand," he cried toward the hovercraft. A paunchy man stepped out of the hovercraft and rushed toward them.

"What happened?"

"She saw her husband on the holo. She won't leave him willingly, Heavensbee."

"Get your hands OFF me! Peeta! Peet-" She felt a sharp stick in her arm and her eyelids fluttered. Everything started to go black and she fell backwards, Finnick catching her before she hit the ground. Heavensbee shoved the needle into his jacket and sighed.

"This isn't good. Haymitch said under no circumstances could we leave the boy behind."

"Capitol devices are tracking us. The decoy isn't working. We have to leave immediately," the Colonel barked as he jumped into the hovercraft. Finnick draped Katniss over his shoulder and shook his head.

"She's going to go insane when she finds out."

"Then let's hope the drug keeps her out of it until we reach 13."

* * *

 _ **Super short but unfortunately I haven't had a lot of time to write with work being so crazy. Sorry for the cliffie but hope you all enjoy your week/weekend! :)**_


	47. Chapter 47

Peeta's entire body ached and the gag cut into his mouth. He glanced up at his chained arms and winced as blood trickled down his wrists. Worst of all, he felt his back burning like the wounds were reopening. Duartyr had said the medicine had to be reapplied for it to keep working. What would happen, then, if he couldn't? Would the lashes start to bleed again? Would he die in this cell? No matter. They had charged him with assassination. He was dead anyway.

No, he thought firmly. Katniss loved him. He knew that now. He couldn't just give up. She needed him. He had to find a way to get to 13. To get back to her.

His training had taught him to come up with several different plans of escape. He had been in this situation before. They would be in soon, to interrogate him, to torture him, or to kill him. Bottom line, they would most likely release him from these chains to transfer him to another room. He could try to overpower them. Peeta had a strength that rivaled Peacekeepers from District 2. His superiors had often said he could easily be a Career tribute in the Hunger Games. He wouldn't just sit here and let them kill him.

He was starving and thirsty by the time someone finally entered his cell. The man was clearly an Avox and he obviously did not want to be there. He yanked Peeta's gag down and went to work on his cuffs.

"Am I in the laboratory," he asked the Avox. The man simply put a finger to his lips and unlocked Peeta's chains.

"I don't want to hurt you," Peeta said softly. "But I will if it will help me get out of here. Or you can just tell me if I am in the laboratory, or am I in the cells?" They had covered his eyes as they had dragged him through the building and he had never seen this part of the mansion before. The Avox pointed outside the cell and nodded. Peeta peered through the strange bars.

"The lab? That's where they're keeping me?" The Avox nodded and Peeta sighed.

"Thank you. Is this safe to drink?" The Avox nodded again and handed Peeta a cup with a straw. The water was warm but Peeta drank greedily, soothing his parched throat. While he drank, the Avox attached a thick collar around Peeta's neck, similar the one he wore himself. Peeta reared back and the man's hands flew into the air. He gestured to his own neck then to Peeta's. Peeta frowned but nodded, allowing the Avox to finish his task. When he was finished, the man took a step back and Peeta studied the accessory dubiously.

"What is this?" The man indicated his own again and shook his head. The Avox then indicated a piece of bread and cheese and Peeta nodded gratefully.

"Have you seen Minister Antonius? Or Caius Snow?" The Avox shook his head sharply and let himself out of the cell.

"Thank you," Peeta called out. He knew the poor man was a prisoner, just like he was, and didn't want to be in the Capitol anymore than Peeta did.

He stuffed the rest of the bread into his mouth and rested his forehead against the bars. He gingerly rubbed his bleeding wrists, his mind racing. Had Katniss made it out of the Capitol? He knew she wouldn't leave willingly, so they must have drugged her. He shook his head sadly, thinking of how hysterical she would be when she realized what had happened.

 _Or will she care at all?_ Peeta winced as the cruel voice returned. Do you really think she will care about what happens to you?

Yes. She loves me. I know she does.

 _You're pathetic. And weak. Why would she love you?_ Peeta shook his head as if to shake away the voice.

Go away. Just leave me alone!

 _I'll never go away. I'll always be here to remind you of how miserably inadequate you are. You tortured your own brother. You've murdered dozens. You're a monster._

Peeta's hands went to his temples and he squeezed his eyes shut. He tried to summon up Katniss's voice but the cold voice drowned hers out.

 _And one day, you'll destroy the one you love._

Never! I could never hurt her.

 _Just wait until those Capitol guards are shoving needles into your veins. You won't be able to stop yourself._ Peeta shook his head.

"I won't hurt her," he said aloud, his teeth gritted. "No matter what they do to me, they can't make me hurt her." The voice merely laughed in his head.

* * *

Katniss heard buzzing all around her. Like a swarm of angry bees, but louder and more annoying. She wanted to swat at them but she knew that wasn't a smart move. She tried to lift a hand to her head but found that her arms wouldn't move. She opened her eyes and glanced to the side. Her arms were bound to the bed. But it wasn't her bed. She tried to sit up but couldn't. Where was she? She could see dark shapes in the doorway, none of them bothering to keep their voices down. Who were all of these people?

She caught a glimpse of a familiar blonde braid and her heart soared.

"Katniss!" The girl tried to squeeze through the crowd of people but found her way blocked by a burly man.

"I want to see my sister!"

"Soldier-"

"If you don't get out of my way, I will tell Nurse Everdeen that you are keeping her daughter sedated. She will not be happy to hear that." The man moved aside and Prim rushed to Katniss's side.

"Oh thank goodness you're awake. How do you feel?"

"Prim, what's going on?" Prim set a hand on Katniss's forehead.

"Temperature is back to normal. Your eyes look clear too. Can you tell me your name?"

"Prim, I know who I am. What is going on?" Prim dragged a chair over and wrapped her fingers around her sister's.

"What do you remember?" Katniss frowned.

"Something on the holo… about Snow dying." Her eyes widened and she shot straight up, her binds preventing her from moving far.

"Peeta! They arrested Peeta!"

"Katniss, calm down."

"We have to save him! Where is he, Prim? Is he alive?"

"Katniss," Prim squeezed her hand. "I need you to calm down, ok? I don't want them to drug you again. You have to calm down." She gently pushed her sister back onto the bed and fluffed the pillows behind her head.

"Breathe and just listen to me, ok? We are in District 13. You've been in and out of consciousness for almost a week and a half."

"A week and-?!"

"Calm," Prim said again. "Every time you get worked up, your blood pressure spikes and these machines alert the doctors. You need to stay calm. Mom kept them away for the first few nights but she is busy with patients right now." Katniss felt dazed.

"The first night you woke up from the drug and you were hysterical. You kicked and punched and screamed for Peeta. They drugged you again and Mom was furious when you didn't wake up the next day. Apparently you had some kind of allergic reaction to the drug and it put you into a coma. You had a high fever and chills and we just couldn't do anything. You thrashed around in your sleep but you wouldn't wake up. They restrained you so you wouldn't hurt yourself. Mom just checked on you a few hours ago and said your blood pressure was returning to normal. Your vitals look alright, but you definitely need to eat something. God Katniss, you scared the hell out of me." Katniss tried to swallow but found it difficult. Prim jumped up and came back with a cup of water, which she coaxed Katniss to take a sip of.

"So what happened to Peeta?"

"I don't want you to get upset, Katniss. You just woke up. Maybe we should-"

"Prim," she blinked back tears. "Just please tell me."

"We don't know much, unfortunately. Boggs was supposed to take a few soldiers back to the Capitol to rescue Peeta and Duartyr, but the Capitol shot down the decoy hovercraft they were using. It wasn't safe to go back. Caius Snow has announced himself President of Panem, and he has done several broadcasts saying that the assassins have been put to death. But Plutarch Heavensbee says it's false information because the Capitol has to put someone on trial which is televised around the country. So he thinks they're being locked up somewhere. President Coin is discussing the best way to rescue them. But we have no contacts in the Capitol anymore. The rebels fled after Snow's death was televised. Cinna and Chase barely made it here alive. Finnick went back for Johanna and just made it back a few days ago. Snow has the country terrified."

"But you made it here safely," Katniss breathed. "So 12 is ok?" Prim bit her lip and Katniss noticed the tears in her sister's eyes.

"Prim? Mom is here, right?"

"Yes. She's safe. A lot of people made it out alive."

"Made it out?" Prim took a deep breath.

"Prim." She turned and saw Gale Hawthorne standing in the doorway. Katniss leaned up a little.

"Gale?"

"Hey Catnip. Good to see you awake."

"You're here? But… I don't understand." Gale's eyes softened and he turned his attention to Prim.

"Have you told her?"

"Not everything. She knows about Peeta though."

"Good. President Coin wants to speak to her."

"She just woke up, Gale!"

"I know that. But she's waited long enough. She's on her way down now." Prim huffed and shook her head.

"Gale, what about your mother? Is she still in 12?" Gale stiffened.

"There is no District 12 anymore."

* * *

Gale left quickly, speaking into his communicuff and Prim set to brushing Katniss's hair.

"Prim? What did he mean?"

"12 is gone, Katniss," she said stiffly. "It happened right after we got to the woods. Haymitch saw hovercrafts approaching and told us all to get moving. We saw them dropping firebombs on the district." Prim's hands shook as she handled Katniss's dark locks.

"How many?"

"More might have made it out. Gale and Thom saved a bunch from the fires and dragged them to the woods. They were injured but were able to help them when we reached 13. More arrive every day. Not just from 12. Other districts. Word is getting out and people are fleeing from Panem's power. I don't think Coin expected so many to come here but she isn't chasing them away."

"How is it here?" Prim finished braiding Katniss's hair and rested it on her shoulder.

"It's alright. The food is pretty bland but at least there's food. And they have a great medical facility here. They're even talking about training me to be a doctor. The head doctors were impressed at how much I know." Katniss squeezed Prim's hand.

"They'd be stupid not to."

"I'm going to order you some food. Mom will want to know that you're awake too. I'll be right back, ok?" Katniss nodded and Prim kissed her forehead.

"Someone get those restraints off my sister while I find her something to eat. She's no longer a danger to herself."

"We need to wait for official clearance from the President, Soldier Everdeen."

"Then you can tell the President why the Mockingjay is unable to eat," Prim said coldly. "They better be removed by the time I get back." She whipped around, her braid nearly hitting the soldier in the face, and stomped off. Katniss settled back on the bed and closed her eyes. She sent her heart out to Peeta, wherever he was. She tried not to think about the horrible things they were doing to him. She silently pleaded that they would not hijack him again. She didn't know if his heart would be able to withstand a second round of poisoning, and if it did succeed, what if he forgot who she was? What if he never recognized her again? She stifled a sob and hid her face in the pillow.

"Why didn't I tell him," she sobbed. "Why didn't I tell him I love him? He doesn't know how much he means to me. Because I've never told him." Images of Peeta bloody and broken and pleading for her to save him flashed through her mind. Her brain conjured up images of her neighbors running from the bombs, bursting into flames and she squeezed her eyes shut, her sobs echoing off the pristine walls.

* * *

"This is not the girl you described."

"Madame President, please. She's just woken up to find that her husband is in captivity. That her district has been bombed to the ground. She's allowed to show her grief."

"That's not the point, Soldier Odair. You all described a force to be reckoned with. That young woman is broken. I know those cries. They are the cries of one who has lost all hope. How can she lead a rebellion?"

"That's why I explicitly said we could not leave her husband behind. She will be a mess without him. Madame President, we have to go back and rescue him."

"As I have said countless times, we barely made it out of the Capitol with the Mockingjay. Going back to the Capitol with Caius Snow in charge would be suicide. And we don't even know if he is alive. It is only a theory of Heavensbee's."

"Then good luck getting her to cooperate. You drugged and kidnapped her. The shit that her mother and sister have been throwing at you is nothing compared to what she is about to give you."

"This rebellion is about all of us, Soldier Abernathy. Not just a single person."

"Your rebellion won't mean anything to her if she doesn't get her husband back."

"What about the Minister? Can Commander Lyme contact him?"

"Antonius is the main traitor here, Fininick! He's obviously working for Caius Snow. And Duartyr hasn't responded to any of my messages, which means he's most likely locked up with Peeta."

"So what do you suggest, Soldier Abernathy?"

"Snow knows about the rebels, that much is clear. We were lucky that so many of them got out in time. So we will have to rely on stealth to rescue Peeta. Cinna still has a few friends there, maybe we can get word to them."

"You think a few stylists will stand up to Caius Snow? I'm sorry, Soldier, there just isn't enough manpower to rescue the peacekeeper right now."

"You need to quit thinking of him as a peacekeeper and start thinking of him as the key to that puzzle in there. She won't open up to many people and she trusts very few. Her sister and her husband are the only people who will be able to get through to her."

"Soldier Hawthorne, what about you? Didn't you say you and the Mockingjay are close?"

"We were best friends, Madame President, but I'm afraid that's in the past. Haymitch is right. I have never seen her open up to someone as she does with Peeta. She really does love him. And Katniss doesn't say I love you to anyone, except to Prim. Not since her father died."

"Then we haven't any other choice. If she really is the spark that you all claim her to be, she will need this boy beside her. Call the troops together, Colonel. We need to form a plan. Soldier Odair, will you inform the Victors of what is happening?"

"Yes Madame President. And I'd like to volunteer to join the rescue mission."

"I'll go too."

"Very well, soldiers. I had intended to speak with Miss Everdeen but I think I will give her some time to adjust. You are all dismissed."

"Mellark, Madame President. Her name is Mellark. And she will remind of you of that after she demands to know when we are rescuing her husband."

"I said we will try, Mr. Abernathy. Thank you for your time."

* * *

When Prim returned, Katniss's restraints had been removed and she was sipping at another glass of water while a nurse checked her pulse. Prim set the tray of food down and glanced at the machines.

"How are her vitals?"

"She's much better. I think she'll be even better with some food."

"Good. Here Katniss, can you sit up?" She helped her sister lean against the pillows and pushed the tray toward her.

"I'll be back to check on her in a little while," the nurse gripped her clipboard. "I'm on my way to your mother's room, I will let her know she is awake."

"Thank you, Rhea." The nurse smiled and left the room while Prim dragged a chair to Katniss's side.

"Feeling any better?"

"All I can think about is Peeta. They're torturing him, Prim. I know they are."

"You can't think like that. You have to believe we will get him out. You are going to drive yourself crazy." Katniss shrugged but took a bite of food.

"Have you met this Coin woman?"

"Once. She's nice enough. Very stoic. She lost her whole family a few years ago, when an smallpox epidemic hit 13. Her daughter and husband. She's well respected around here though."

"I just want to know why they didn't do anything all these years. Why they just let us suffer for so long. Why do they all of a sudden care about what happens to Panem?"

"I don't think it's like that, Katty. They have been trying to launch the rebellion for a long time. Haymitch told me that Daddy was even in contact with them. Alma Coin was a Colonel before she was President and apparently she rose to power pretty quickly. She's ambitious but I think she really wants to help people. Which is something I can't say for any of the Snows."

"I wonder if Snow knew that 13 survived. Did they have some kind of deal or something?"

"That's something you'll have to ask President Coin. I know she is anxious to meet you. Maybe if you're feeling better later, you can go speak to her." But Katniss didn't want to be near anyone, save for Prim. So she remained in her room for two more days, refusing to see anyone. Her mother sat by her side and made sure she ate but Katniss pretended to be asleep when someone else would stop by to see her.

* * *

Haymitch barged in, ignoring Violet's protests.

"Enough pretending, sweetheart, I know you're not asleep." Katniss glanced at him and frowned.

"Go away."

"President Coin wants to speak with you. Now."

"I don't want to speak with her."

"Katniss, you need to cooperate with her if you want her to rescue Peeta." She sat up straighter.

"She will?"

"She's talking to her Colonel about it. Devising a plan to get him out of there safely. It would be good for you to be cordial and listen to what she has to say. Cooperate with her and bargain for your husband."

"Peeta isn't some bargaining chip," she exclaimed angrily. "And I don't cooperate with anyone who drugs and kidnaps me!" Haymitch sighed heavily.

"I don't agree with their methods but they were just following orders. Liberate the Mockingjay. They couldn't go back for Peeta because they were being tracked. Boggs barely got you out of the Capitol alive. If you had waited another minute, your hovercraft would have been shot down. Snow knew you were in the Capitol and he knew 13 was coming for you."

"And he's torturing Peeta to get to me."

"We don't know that for sure. You said Peeta was promoted to General. That's a position of high power. Even the Capitol respects its traditions."

"Caius Snow is throwing out all traditions, it seems. I'm not talking to anyone until they rescue Peeta." Haymitch glanced at Violet and shook his head.

"I'll tell her you're still heavily medicated. Think about what I said, Katniss." He left and Katniss fell back onto the bed.

"Katniss, Haymitch is right," Prim squeezed her sister's hand. "If you want Peeta back, you need to show Coin that you're willing to help. You need to become the Leader of this rebellion."

"Not without Peeta."

"Let's let her rest, Primrose," her mother cut in before Prim could speak again. "Page me if you need anything, dear." Katniss crossed her arms and closed her eyes until she heard her mother and sister leave the room. She curled onto her side and buried her face in the pillow, angrily wiping at the falling tears.

* * *

Peeta leaped to his feet when he heard his cell door being opened. He was surprised to see both the Minister and Caius Snow. He expected his torture to be carried out by someone with very little power. Both men folded their hands behind their backs.

"General Mellark."

"Oh I'm still a General then? Does that mean my torture will be light?"

"We just want answers, General. If you provide the information we seek and swear your loyalty to me, we will let you go and allow you to return to your position."

"My loyalty to you? My president's murderer?" Snow's eyes flashed and his hand dove into his pocket. Peeta felt an intense shock of pain and nearly fell to his knees.

"I will make this very easy for you, Mellark."

"Oh I love it when you all use that phrase. 'I'll make this easy for you'. As if we would intentionally choose the more difficult way of doing things and as if you actually want to make things easy on us." His cheek was rewarded with another shock and he crashed to his knees, clutching at the bars in pain.

"I hear tell you have the most valuable silver tongue, Mellark. It is why I have not cut it out like your other General friend." Peeta felt his insides churn.

"Continue to test me, however, and I will not be so lenient. My father may have appreciated your humor but I do not. Now, as I was saying, this will be easy. Answer our questions, we will reward you. Refuse or lie, and you will know pain unlike anything you have ever experienced. Do you understand?"

"Oh so you know what all I've been through," Peeta snapped. He gritted his teeth as the pain lasted longer this time. Snow held up a tiny device and pushed the button again. Peeta's eyes narrowed on Snow's beefy finger, which hovered over the button.

"Minister Antonius has told me about a little project that you were a part of some time ago. When Colonel Haemon was in charge of your training. What I find most intriguing is that you did not seem to remember who you were. The Colonel reported that you displayed violent behavior towards not only your fellow peacekeepers but those close to you as well." Snow leaned in close as Peeta's jaw twitched.

"Hm? Your own brother, isn't that correct? Sentenced to what was it, twenty floggings? Not even close to what ol Romulus gave you in 12. And yet here you stand, as proud and arrogant as ever."

"I don't know, President Snow. Take a look at his shirt. I think his wounds are bleeding again." Peeta winced as Antonius reached over and trailed a finger along his shoulder.

"I think you're right. Call a doctor. We don't want him to bleed to death. Not until we have a chance to test this experiment you all were working on." Peeta's eyes widened in horror as the two men backed out of the cell and closed the door tightly.

"Adjust the dosage of venom that was used in the first case. Obviously the prisoner has built an immunity to it, so we need to increase it."

"You can't do this! Please!" Peeta gripped the bars tightly, his knuckles white while Snow gave him a lazy smile.

"I know all about your little rebellion, Mellark. Your wife leading it. What is it they call her, Minister?"

"The Mockingjay."

"The Mockingjay. Yes that's it. Just imagine. The Mockingjay tearfully reunites with her husband. I'm sure that traitor Heavensbee will have that broadcast all over Panem. But amidst a passionate embrace, her husband wraps his hands around her slender throat and chokes the life out of her. The Mockingjay is dead at the hands of her own husband, and the rebellion fails before the eyes of millions. And it will be all thanks to you, Mellark." Peeta shook his head, his eyes swimming.

"Of course, there is always another, less bloody way. You can swear your loyalty to me and to Panem, and your wife can renounce the rebellion. I'll allow the both of you to live peacefully, together, wherever you choose. She can even bring her sister and her mother with her. Now that's a fine deal, I'd say." Antonius nodded, raising a brow.

"Take the deal, Mellark. You're a fine Peacekeeper. You were ruthless on your assignments. Until you returned to 12, you were cold and calculating. That wife of yours has made you soft."

"Oh but imagine the both of them serving the Capitol. The daughter of the Mockingjay, on our side. Imagine what that would say to the citizens of Panem."

"Get a doctor in here," Antonius snapped into his radio. "Take care of General Mellark's wounds."

"Think about what we have said, Mellark," Snow said solemnly. "One way or another, we will crush this rebellion. Will your Mockingjay be dead or alive when we do it?"


	48. Chapter 48

"Come on Katniss, you have to talk to her."

"No, Gale, I don't. Everyone keeps saying she is trying to rescue Peeta. Well then where is he? It's been nearly a month! I don't even know if he's alive at this point!"

"Exactly. We don't know if he's alive. So we don't want to send in all of our resources without knowing for sure if it's a waste of time."

"Gale," Prim said sharply and he huffed.

"I just mean… look, Katniss, why should President Coin do anything for you, when you refuse to even talk to her? Everyone has been telling her about this incredible girl who can lead the rebellion and she sees you and you're screaming for your husband and crying and you're…"

"I'm what, Gale?"

"You're weak," he said heavily. Prim's eyes flashed and Rory jumped to his feet.

"Prim, maybe we should take a walk."

"You don't talk to my sister that way, Gale Hawthorne!"

"I'm just trying to be honest, Prim. She's the leader of this rebellion, like your father was. She needs to start acting like it."

"And why should she start doing things for people who don't follow through with their promises? You all said you would come up with a way to get Peeta out of the Capitol. All she wants is her husband, Gale! That's not a crime."

"I never said it was. And if I had the power, I would go get him Catnip. I would take a hovercraft to the Capitol and bust him out of there. But I don't run this district. President Coin does. So please. Try to make nice with her and just talk to her. Hear what she has to say. You need to start working together, to rescue Peeta and to launch this rebellion." Katniss sighed and uncrossed her arms.

"I'll meet with her Gale. Only to ask her face to face why she hasn't rescued Peeta yet. If she wants to discuss this rebellion, she needs to bring my husband back." Gale ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

"I don't know what's happened to you, Katniss. You've never been the type to fall all over some guy."

"Gale!"

"Tell me I'm wrong, Prim! Loving him has made her weak!"

"I'm about to slap your brother across this room," she said through gritted teeth, leaning across Rory. The younger Hawthorne cast his brother an anxious look.

"Look, maybe we should let Katniss get some rest. What's your schedule say, Gale?"

"It's dinner time soon anyway. Vick is bringing Posy?"

"Last I checked, yeah."

"Ok. I need to speak to Colonel Boggs, then I'll meet you downstairs for dinner." He nodded to his brother and Prim and yanked the door open.

"Katniss, please think about what I've said. What we have all been saying. The best way to get Peeta back is to start cooperating. If President Coin thinks that you're unreliable and that she can't work with you, things will not be good. Do you understand what I'm saying?"

"I said I would talk to her, Gale," she said through gritted teeth. With a sigh, Gale left and Rory shrugged miserably.

"Since Mom died, no one has been able to get through to him. He's become so close with the soldiers here that you would think he was born in 13."

"Gale has always had that soldier inside him," Katniss muttered, thinking of all the times he would rant about the Capitol and about politics while they were trying to hunt. She wondered why Coin hadn't just made him the Mockingjay and just forget about her. Rory was right; Gale had become quite close with Coin and Colonel Boggs and the rest of the soldiers. Katniss heard Rory and Prim talking when they thought she was asleep. Coin was adamant that they needed more districts on their side before they tried to stand up to the Capitol. She was impatient to announce the launch of the rebellion and start broadcasting Katniss all over Panem to get their message out.

Prim leaned over and kissed her sister's forehead.

"I'll be back after dinner. Mom said she would be down to help you with physical therapy. We need to get you walking more." Katniss nodded and sat up in the bed. She had been trying to walk around the room so not to lose the use of her legs but getting all of the medication out of her system was harder than they thought. Violet insisted on using physical therapy to get Katniss strong again but she was clearly pretty weak, and she wasn't used to being cooped up inside all day. Katniss had been less than pleased to hear that no one really went outside in 13. The district survived underground, since the Capitol had bombed the surface to rubble. Katniss wanted to ask if she could just get some fresh air but she was pretty sure asking for anything right now would be futile. She knew she had to buck up and face the woman. She dreaded it but she knew it was the only way she would get her husband back.

Katniss pushed the blankets back and set her feet on the cold concrete floor. Her mother would be furious if she saw that her daughter had taken off the warm socks she had brought. Katniss actually relished the shock that came from touching the cold floor. The pain helped her focus, kept her present. She gingerly took a step toward the door and nearly fell backwards. Deciding she had better wait for her mother, she sat back down and let her feet dangle off the bed. She reached for Peeta's shirt, stuffed under her pillow, and brought it to her nose. His bags had been stored in her room along with hers, and she was grateful they hadn't been left in the Capitol. Even though he had, she thought bitterly. She pulled the gold pin out from under her pillow and flipped it over in her palm. It was her father's mockingjay pin, that Prim had brought from Peeta's house. He'd said she would need it, her sister had told her. She stared at the gold bird glinting in her hand and she sighed.

"Why so glum, little songbird?" She looked up into her father's smiling face and sighed.

"Cora Reynolds and Jacey Mcdaniels were making fun of me this morning. They said I wear the same dress every day and said I was starting to smell. The other kids were laughing at me." She plucked at her little red dress and pouted.

"Hm, let me see." Her father buried his nose in her hair and sniffed loudly. He playfully nuzzled her with his nose all the way down to her face and she giggled, trying to bat him away.

"Nope, you still smell as sweet as ever!" He tugged at one of her braids and she laughed.

"But why can't I have a new dress? Cora's daddy brings her a new dress every week."

"Cora's daddy works in Merchant Square and has a lot more money than we do." She pouted again and he moved her braid behind her ear.

"But do you know what?"

"What?"

"We have something that they don't have. Something much better than a new dress."

"We do? What is it?" Her father pulled out a gold pin from his pocket and held it out toward her.

"What's that?"

"That's a mockingjay. It has a pretty song, like you and me. We have our song, Katkin. People would pay a lot to have a voice like you do. I'll bet Cora and Jacey are both jealous of your voice."

"No they're not," she pulled her knees to her chest. "There's nothing special about me." He smiled and released a low whistle. The birds around him started to echo the tune and he winked at his daughter.

"They want you to sing, Katkin." She looked dubious but opened her mouth and the sweetest melody flowed out. The birds fell silent until she was finished, then started to whistle the tune she had been singing. Her father wrapped his arm around her and kissed her hair.

"Just remember, my songbird, when you're sad about something, your song can chase those sad thoughts away."

Katniss opened her eyes and blinked around the room. She held her father's pin in one hand, her husband's shirt in the other. Both men lost to her, both men who held pieces of her heart. Her fingers closed around the pin and she took a deep breath. Glancing to the side, she grabbed the device that Gale had given to her. Her thumb pressed the button on the side and she raised it to her mouth.

"This is Katniss Everdeen Mellark. I'm ready to talk."

* * *

Peeta blinked up from the floor as his cell doors rattled. His head throbbed and his body ached. He squeezed his eyes shut against the hallucinations that had been invading his mind for days. His skin itched but his hands were chained behind his back that kept him from scratching. If he could, he would have sank his nails so deep into his flesh until the poison flowed out with his blood. He still heard buzzing in his ears and he shook his head frantically. He'd been sure all of the damned mutts had gotten out. He tried to blink, to focus on something, anything, but his vision was blurred and he could only let out garbled wails. His veins were on fire, and he wondered if it was possible to actually replace blood with something else. Like fire, perhaps. It was the Capitol, he reasoned. He imagined anything was possible.

No, he thought with a grimace, if anything was possible, his back wouldn't be burning right now. Reminding him of how close to death he had come. Of how close he was again.

After Snow and Antonius had left him, a Capitol doctor came in to see him. It was obvious immediately, however, that the Capitol doctor wasn't as skilled as Duarty's friend had been. He had confessed he wasn't sure how to close the wounds and Peeta had told him about the medicine the doctor had given him. It seemed there wasn't anything like that around here; the doctor had certainly never heard of it. So the doctor had bandaged Peeta's back and given him some capsules to help the blood clot. That night, however, Peeta had passed out from blood loss and found himself face down on a steel table the next morning.

Peeta wondered, with all of the alterations the Capitolites did to themselves, how they couldn't figure out how to heal his wounds. But his injuries were serious, the doctors whispered, and they were worried he would die from losing too much blood. In the end, they decided to use old fashioned stitches, giving him only a little morphling for the pain. At least Mrs. Everdeen had given him sleep syrup and enough morphling to keep him knocked out, he thought grumpily. It was agony, feeling the needles pierce his raw flesh. Since there were so many lacerations, the doctors worked in numbers, moving across his back and pulling the skin closed. Peeta decided they weren't trying to help him at all but actually trying to kill him. He would take another lashing over this.

After the doctors had finished, they'd told Peeta to lie completely still and not move unless absolutely necessary. They fed him some kind of thick liquid that tasted like what he imagined smelly socks would taste like, which he sucked through a straw. He was not allowed to leave the infirmary for three days. No one came to visit him in that time.

Three days later, the doctors escorted him back to his cell. He waited for another day, desperate for some real food. He wanted to do some exercises but he was afraid of pulling the stitches out. So he remained motionless, cross legged on the floor.

Finally, Snow visited him again.

He had gripped the bars and grinned at how defeated Peeta looked.

"You're not looking so good, General Mellark. Have you come to a decision?"

"Katniss would never turn her back on her people and side with you. And you could never make me harm her. So do your worst. You are no president of mine." Snow's eyes had flashed and he'd let out a whistle.

"I so hoped you would come to your senses, Mellark. It seems that you need a little reminder of what tracker jacker venom feels like." Fear had flashed in Peeta's eyes but he'd lifted his chin defiantly.

"Guards. We are ready to escort Mellark to the laboratory. Open his cell."

"Sir, Doctor Vestus has been trying to reach you. There is no tracker jacker venom left for the experiment, sir." Snow had turned toward the attendant with fury in his eyes.

"I beg your pardon?"

"You have ordered thirteen prisoners to be injected this week, sir. Your efforts have exhausted the Minister's supply." Peeta had closed his eyes in silent thanks and lowered his head. Snow had stormed off, screaming for the doctor and for Antonius. Peeta had been saved.

Or so he'd thought.

* * *

He wasn't sure how much time had passed but Snow had returned to his cell with two guards. They'd quickly chained Peeta's hands behind his back and held tightly to his shoulders as they lead him down the hall, to yet another cell. This one had no bars but four transparent walls. Peeta had frowned as he was pushed inside and he'd cast Snow a suspicious look.

"Do you know where tracker jackers come from, Mellark?" Peeta's brow had furrowed.

"Yes sir. A muttation created by the Capitol game-makers. They were used before the Dark Days as landmines and after the Dark Days, the hives were destroyed except for the ones in the districts. They were there to keep us in line. To assert your power over us."

"Quite right. You know your history. And do you know how many stings it takes to make the victim hallucinate?" Peeta was getting more nervous by the second.

"Most people can't tolerate more than a few stings. Most die at once. If the victim lives, the hallucinations brought on by the venom have actually drawn people to madness."

"So how many do you think you can survive, Mellark?" He had jerked his head and a sliding door in Peeta's cell had opened. He'd heard angry buzzing before he'd seen them. A swarm of terrifying wasps- no, worse, tracker jackers, had flown into his cell and he had backed up against the wall.

"Please," he'd whispered. "Don't do this. These things will kill me."

"Perhaps. Perhaps they will just alter your memories. I suppose we shall see." Peeta had watched the mutts fly around his cell with wide eyes. He knew the mutts were coded to attack anyone who destroyed their nest and fortunately for him, he hadn't done that. But he was also the only person the mutts could detect. He'd imagined it wouldn't take them too long before they attacked.

And he'd been right. The first sting had made him cry out. He had lost track of how many had stung him but he'd fallen to his knees and his head fell forward.

"Please help me," he'd said weakly.

"President Snow, I must insist that we withdraw the muttations. He has already succumbed to the poison. Too much will make his heart stop."

"He has developed an extraordinary resistance to the venom. It was reported that great amounts of it was injected during his initial training. It's going to take a lot with this one. I want that girl erased from his mind."

"With all due respect, sir, an actual sting is more powerful than injected venom. The venom has been diluted before injection, and in this case, the venom is much stronger coming from the actual source. He will die, sir."

"Take him back to his cell." Smoke had filled the cell and the tracker-jackers were subdued. The door had opened and hands gripped his arms. They'd dragged him back to his cell and he'd landed on his side, unable to move.

He didn't remember much about the first time he had been poisoned but he was fairly certain it had not been this excruciating. The stings on his hands, arms, and face had grown to be the size of an orange, and Peeta was alarmed to see them smoking. He was also positive the mutts had gotten into his eyes, nose, and mouth. He felt stings in his throat and he tried to swallow, moaning in pain. He shook his head, images flying through his mind. Katniss, with a knife protruding from her chest. Katniss, mauled by a wild animal. His family, bursting into flame. Katniss weeping over Primrose's mangled body. Primrose weeping over Katniss's mangled body. Katniss. Katniss. Katniss.

Peeta squeezed his eyes shut, willing the nightmares to leave but they refused. He tried to conjure up her voice but it wouldn't come. He saw her standing over him, laughing.

 _Serves you right. You're a monster. A mutt. I could never love you._

"Katniss," he whimpered, his body trembling violently.

 _"I will never love you."_ He shook his head and tried to sit up. He was in too much pain. He was sure this was the end. And he welcomed it. He lay back on the floor and curled up on his side, willing for the end to hurry along so he would be rid of this pain.

* * *

He blinked as he heard the cell door open and he vaguely registered soft hands on his face. His eyes fluttered open to find grey ones inches from his.

"Ka…" he started to speak but couldn't remember the name. It was on the tip of his tongue. Those grey eyes though… so familiar.

"Oh Peeta, you're alive," a sweet voice whimpered. He heard a key against a lock and felt something around his arms click.

"Let's get you cleaned up." She helped him lean against her, and she took his hand into her own. He tried to focus on her face but his head throbbed too much.

"This will sting for just a moment." She set to work on removing the barbed stingers and Peeta smelled something foul coming from the wounds. The young woman dabbed some kind of ointment on the stings, then wrapped his hands with gauze. He kept his eyes open long enough to take her all in. Grey eyes and dark hair that she reached up with a slender hand to tuck behind her ear.

"Who are you?" Her lip trembled.

"Oh Peeta, please don't tell me you've forgotten me." He shook his head, feeling guilty at the pain in her voice.

"I'm sorry-"

"I'm your wife, Peeta."

* * *

 _ **I'm sorry it's so short but I'm writing more as we speak! Hopefully will have a nice long one for yall next week! :) XOXO**_


	49. Chapter 49

Katniss leaned against the wall for a moment before taking a deep breath and knocking on the door. Her mother had wanted her to use a wheelchair to get up here, her sister had asked her to use a cane. Gale had offered to escort her. She had refused all of them. She wanted to meet Coin standing as straight as she could and not as just some weak girl from the Seam. She knew Coin already had her opinions about her. She had taken a long time before she had agreed to this meeting. She needed to get on the woman's good side so she could plan a rescue attempt for her husband.

"Enter," she heard from the other side and she tried to keep her hand from trembling as she turned the handle.

There was a long table in front of her but only a few people sat behind it. Gale sat at the end, while a dark man sat on the other side, his arms crossed over his chest. Haymitch was there too, chewing on his dirty fingernails. The paunchy game-maker she had met in the Capitol and a stern looking woman with grey hair and grey eyes that matched. This had to be her, she thought. She held herself with rigid authority. There was no kindness in her eyes, though she offered Katniss a smile.

"Mrs. Mellark. It's wonderful to meet you at last." Katniss nodded.

"Thank you for agreeing to see me, President Coin. I'm sorry my recovery took so long."

"I trust you are feeling better?"

"Yes."

"Good. We have a lot of work to do." Coin motioned for her to sit and Katniss sat across from them. Gale gave her an encouraging smile and a nod. Coin had papers spread all over the table and she pushed one towards Katniss.

"I didn't have the pleasure of meeting your father, Katniss, but I have heard many wonderful things about him. These are his plans that he developed as the Mockingjay. What we would like to do differently is broadcast you for all of Panem to see. He had to remain hidden from the Capitol, but we want to launch this rebellion with full force. We want Snow to know he has a war on his hands. And you will be at the front of it, leading your troops. We need all thirteen districts to stand up to the Capitol, right now."

"And what about Peeta," she asked firmly. "What is your plan to rescue him?" Gale sighed and Coin sat back in her chair.

"Mrs. Mellark-"

"You left him there," she continued. "You left him there to die."

"Mrs. Mellark," Coin pressed her palms to the table and rose to her feet. "This revolution is about all of us. And we need you to fight with us. We will do what we can to get your husband back. But it will take time. It will take resources that frankly, we don't have to spare. But you must show us you are committed to being our Mockingjay first. That is my proposition." Katniss stood, placing her hands on her father's plans. Her cheeks were burning, and voices echoed in her head, Gale's voice calling her weak, Rory telling Prim that he was worried that she wouldn't be able to do it.

"You will put a mission together, right now, to rescue my husband and General Duartyr. You will launch this mission before the end of the week and in return, I will make my first propaganda video while this rescue mission is being carried out. We will launch the rebellion as soon as they return. And I will swear before Panem to be the Mockingjay."

"Individuals don't make demands in 13," Coin raised her voice.

"Once Peeta and Duartyr are rescued, they will not be held responsible for their crimes as Peacekeepers," Katniss went on as if she hadn't heard Coin. "You will pardon them of all crimes against the districts, and treat them as soldiers for the rebellion. You will personally pledge this in front of the entire population of District Thirteen and the remainder of Twelve. Soon. Today. It will be recorded for future generations. You will hold yourself and your government responsible for their safety, or you'll find yourself another Mockingjay!"

"That's her!" Plutarch turned to Haymitch, excitement shining in his eyes. "Right there. With the costume, gunfire in the background, just a hint of smoke." Haymitch didn't say anything but Katniss could swear he was trying not to smile. Coin stared at Katniss, her eyes narrowed in hatred.

"Do you have any other conditions?" Katniss started to shake her head but Haymitch coughed and hid his face in his hand. He released a small sound that sounded like a cat's meow. Gale, Plutarch, and Boggs cast him a baffled look but Katniss's eyes widened in understanding and she nodded.

"My sister gets to keep her cat."

"Very well, Mrs. Mellark. Colonel Boggs, we will need to arrange a meeting to review the blueprints of Capitol airspace. We need to be ready to launch the hovercraft tomorrow. Please see to this immediately." Boggs nodded and swiftly left the room. Coin turned back to Katniss and attempted a smile.

"You'd better perform, Katniss."

"I'll perform, after you've made the announcement. I can't lead this rebellion alone, President Coin. I need my husband by my side." Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Gale cross his arms and lean back in his chair. Coin nodded.

"I'll leave her in your hands then, Plutarch." Coin swept past Katniss and left the room.

"Excellent. Excellent." Plutarch sank down, elbows on the table, rubbing his eyes. "You know what I miss? More than anything? Coffee. I ask you, would it be so unthinkable to have something to wash down the gruel and turnips?" Haymitch jumped to his feet and pushed Katniss down into a chair.

"Here sweetheart, have a seat. I know you've been struggling to stand up straight this whole time." She shot him a look but allowed herself to be steered into a seat.

"Alright Katniss, let's get down to business. You know in general what we're asking of you and I'm aware you have mixed feelings about participating. I hope this will help." Plutarch pushed a large sketchbook bound in black leather toward her. She glanced at him suspiciously but her curiosity won and she flipped it open. Her eyes widened as the first image was herself, standing straight and strong, in a black uniform. She looked back up at the men and Plutarch nodded.

"Marvelous, isn't it? Artistic and stylish, yet quite useful. It's designed to keep you completely safe."

"You'll be the best dressed rebel in history," Gale said softly, giving her a smile. She studied the drawing closer. The swoop of the helmet, the curve to the breastplate, the slight fullness of the sleeves that allowed the white folds under the arms to show. She would actually become a Mockingjay in this uniform.

"But who-?"

"Bring him in," Haymitch nodded to the door. Katniss turned and rose, shakily, to her feet. The newcomer rushed toward her and embraced her tightly.

"I'm so sorry, Katniss," he whispered in her ear.

"You'll help me do this?" He cupped her chin and smiled.

"We're all betting on you, Girl on Fire."

"Cinna has been a part of the Resistance for quite some time and has been designing a uniform for you. He made some changes when he finally met you in person in the Capitol." Cinna glanced at the sketchbook and helped Katniss sit down again.

"So what do you think?"

"It's amazing," she nodded. He pulled a chair beside her and nodded toward the book.

"Go on. Flip through." She turned the pages, her eyes widening at every detail of the uniform. The carefully tailored layers of body armor, the hidden weapons in the boots and belt, the special reinforcements over the heart.

"This is incredible, Cinna, really."

"We think that it might be best to build you, our rebel leader, from the outside...in," Plutarch said cheerfully. "That is to say, let's find the most stunning Mockingjay look possible, and then work your personality up to deserving it!"

"You already have her uniform," Gale pointed out. "Once Cinna finishes it, anyway."

"Which I almost am," he nodded. "I just need a few more measurements and Katniss's input, of course."

"Yes, but is she scarred and bloody? Is she glowing with the fire of rebellion? Just how grimy can we make her without disgusting people? At any rate, she has to be something. I mean, obviously this" - Plutarch waved toward her - "won't cut it."

"Chase and I have already said we can act as her prep team as well, Plutarch," Cinna said, somewhat defensively. "But we want to show the districts that she is one of them. We don't want her to look too Capitol. Is it true, by the way, what they're saying about Effie and Ellie?"

"We managed to rescue Effie," Haymitch said gruffly. "But Ellie is still missing." Cinna shook his head sadly.

"Neither of them were involved with the rebellion at all. They didn't know anything."

"Ellie might be in the same place they're keeping Duartyr and Peeta. We just have to keep hoping."

"They killed Portia because they couldn't find me. I'm fairly certain our boss got the same punishment."

"It's not your fault, Cinna," Haymitch said firmly. "Who knows how long Snow has been planning this? He must have been watching everyone for a long time."

"Yes. Well. Katniss, would you like to follow me to my compartment? I have your uniform in my closet." Cinna's professional manner was back and he hid his pain behind his kind smile.

"We will meet later today to discuss future propos," Plutarch waved them off. "As President Coin said, we need to launch this rebellion with full force."

"But how," Katniss's brow furrowed as she remembered something. "The Capitol has sole control of the broadcasts."

"But we have Beetee. About ten years ago, he essentially redesigned the underground network that transmits all the programming. He thinks there's a reasonable chance it can be done. Of course, we'll need something to air. So we'll need to film something soon," Plutarch clapped his hands excitedly. Katniss felt sick. It was still just entertainment to him. Did he really believe in the rebellion, or was he planning to sit back and watch when the bloodshed began?

"Go on and see what Cinna has made for you, sweetheart," Haymitch waved her off. "We will see you later."

* * *

Cinna wrapped his arm around her waist, to help her lean against him, as he lead her back to their bunkers.

"I'm certain you should at least be using a cane to get around," he said in her ear.

"I can walk on my own."

"You shouldn't push yourself so hard, Katniss. Beating yourself up won't get Peeta back." Her stiff form slumped in his arms and he paused.

"He's alive, Katniss. I'm certain of it."

"What if they tortured him again? Or made him forget me? He whipped his own brother because he didn't recognize him. What happens if he forgets me?"

"That could never happen, Katniss," said a voice behind them. She whirled around to find Peeta's brother leaning against the door.

"Rye," she said, reaching out to brace herself against the wall. "You moved compartments?"

"President Coin finally moved us to a bigger compartment, after Madge told her for the fifteenth time we got married before we left 12. Hello Cinna. Saw that we were neighbors," he nodded toward Cinna.

"Ryen," Cinna nodded. "I saw your wife leave early this morning. How is she adjusting?"

"Madge is a trooper. The deaths of her parents hit her hard but she said her father knew what he had signed up for. The same goes for Peeta, you know."

"I don't want to hear it, Rye," she said heatedly. For weeks, Rye had been visiting her and assuring her that Peeta knew what he was doing. He was still a soldier and knew how to survive. But Katniss didn't want to hear it. She just wanted him safe and in her arms. And the first thing she would do, she swore to herself, was tell him that she loved him.

"Katniss, you have to believe me. Nothing could make him forget you. Peeta has been in love with you since he was a little boy! Even when they tortured him and changed him in 2, he still knew who you were. He forgot who I was but you don`t forget the face of the person who was your last hope." Katniss's brow furrowed and she crossed her arms over her chest.

"What's that supposed to mean, Ryen? How could I be Peeta's last hope?"

"You saved him, Katniss. I mean, thinking of you brought him back. He held onto the image of you while he was being tortured. It grounded him. And it will work again. He loves you fiercely, so there is no way he will forget." Her eyes became glassy and she shuffled her foot.

"And what if they just kill him? Decide he's too much trouble?"

"You have to have faith that he will come back to us," he took her hand and squeezed. "Believe that he will find a way out of there, alive and unharmed. My baby brother has surprised us all more than a few times. And I'm pretty sure he will be doing everything he can to get back to you."

"I've agreed to be their Mockingjay, if they go and get him." Rye's eyes widened.

"They agreed to that?"

"They didn't really have a choice. If they want me to perform, they need to find a way to get him out of there. Alive. Coin knows I won't do anything for them unless they at least try."

"I've seen 13's military and their weaponry. It's pretty impressive, compared to what we had in 2. You'd think Snow would arm his Peacekeepers with the best but this place has capabilities beyond what I've ever seen. I have a hard time believing that Snow knew all of this had survived. If he did, I think he would have tried to invade a long time ago."

"Maybe he didn't know," Cinna said softly. "The knowledge could have died with Snow's predecessor. The Snows haven't been in power for long and Corialanus Snow rose to power using… despicable methods."

"What do you mean? How do you know so much about Snow's rise to power?"

"Victors talk," Cinna shrugged. "Have a chat with Finnick Odair sometime. I'm sure he can tell you things that would make your head spin."

"Why would Finnick Odair be privy to that kind of information," Rye asked with a frown. Katniss caught Cinna's eye and she chewed her lip. Finnick, like many other Victors, were sold in the Capitol. She imagined he had picked up quite a few secrets during all that time.

"Never mind, Rye. Cinna and I need to work on my first propo video. I'd love to have you and Madge over for dinner tonight, if you'd like."

"Actually, we were going to ask if you would come to the cafeteria to eat with us. Bing and April have been asking about you, too. Dad keeps checking with your mother about you. I know everyone would love to see you."

"Not everyone," she muttered, remembering the first time she'd seen Mrs. Mellark here in 13.

It was a few weeks after Katniss had started to get up and walk around, taking short walks down the hall and just getting out of the room, because her mother and sister insisted. She hadn't been aware that the Mellarks had compartments close to the infirmary- in fact, she hadn't known that they had made it to 13. Katniss hadn't exactly asked about them, but to be fair, the only person she was asking about was Peeta. She hadn't even been aware that Hazelle has passed the night of everyone's escape from 12. She just couldn't find it in her to care about anyone else for the longest time. Not even about herself. She'd tried to stop eating but her forceful sister had angrily yelled at her that Peeta had not taken nearly forty lashings for Katniss to starve herself to death.

Katniss had been struggling down the hall when she'd heard Mrs. Mellark's shrill voice about the seam trash surviving when her son hadn't. April and Madge had rushed forward to embrace Katniss while Bing and Bran dragged Mrs. Mellark back to her room. Madge had brushed Katniss's hair back and whispered soothing words in her ear about how Peeta was alive and he would be with her again soon.

Katniss hadn't seen Mrs. Mellark since that incident.

"Mom won't change, Katniss," Rye shrugged. "She's always been that way. But she's still family. She's your mother-in-law, whether or not either of you want to acknowledge that. And she can deny it all she wants but she's worried sick about Peeta. But don't come for her. Come for the rest of the family. We are still here for you." Katniss wanted to refuse but her brother-in-law seemed earnest and concerned for her. He had come even without Madge to check on her. She knew he was probably only doing it because Peeta had asked but she appreciated it all the same.

"OK. I'll come. Is there enough room for Prim and Mom?"

"We'll make room," he nodded. "Get excited. Dinner tonight is turnip soup."

"Joy. Nice to change it up from the boiled turnips we have for lunch."

"Greasy Sae has been trying to get them to let her change up the menu a little. Maybe you should hunt and bring her some meat." Katniss actually perked up at this.

"That's not a bad idea. Thanks Rye." He smiled.

"Thought you would like that. I need to find Madge before dinner. See you tonight, Katniss." She turned to Cinna and cocked her head.

"Do you think they will let me hunt?"

"If you present it as helping 13, I don't see why not. Maybe you should add it to your conditions."

"I don't want to seem like I am demanding too much," she shook her head. "And I don't think asking for my husband's life is too much."

"No, it isn't. Come inside." He took her hand and lead her into his compartment. She glanced around, noticing immediately that only one person occupied the room.

"Cinna, where does Chase stay?"

"Down the hall," he sighed.

"Then why is your compartment so big? I mean, there's enough room for two people in here."

"They wanted to give me extra room to work on your uniform. The closet takes up a lot of space."

"But-"

"Take a look at your uniform and let me know what you think," he cut her off. She was beginning to realize that he didn't want to talk about his boyfriend, for whatever reason. He withdrew the black suit from the closet and her jaw dropped.

"Cinna," she breathed. "It's…"

"Do you like it?" He sounded anxious. Unsure, even.

"It's incredible. I mean, it's more than that. It's… it's like a real bird. You won't even recognize me."

"Coin keeps referring to you as their mockingjay, but mockingjays fly free and don't belong in a cage. They don't belong to anyone. Neither do you, Katniss. You will lead this rebellion because you choose to, not because someone wants you to or because you're fulfilling a legacy. Because YOU want things to change. And you believe that you can do it."

"I don't know if that's all true," she mumbled, shaking her head. "I still don't know how I'm supposed to lead a rebellion."

"People will follow you. You saw how people reacted to you at Snow's mansion. They know who you are and where you come from. You think you are a timid girl but when you stand up for what you believe in and what you love… you really are a girl on fire." He winked and sat on the edge of his bed.

"Now, Beetee and I have been working together on some special surprises for you. They are down in the armory, when you feel up to visiting. I need you to try the uniform on and tell me how it fits. The bathroom is right through there." She clutched the uniform to her chest and slipped into the bathroom. She nearly fell twice but managed to pull on the black armor and stood up straight. She gazed into the full length mirror with wide eyes. She was right; she didn't recognize herself. She looked fierce and angry, like a true warrior. Or maybe the talk of Peeta had reignited her flames. She wasn't sure but she wished she could attend dinner wearing this. She was sure she would be able to put Mrs. Mellark in her place.

Cinna stood when she came back out and he nodded approvingly.

"You look like a leader. Plutarch will be pleased. How does it feel?" She nodded, unsure of how to describe the suit.

"Feels good," she said, feeling stupid. He smiled, his eyes sparkling.

"I'm glad you like it. I tried to have it finished before I met you but I went back and made several adjustments to it. You'll be quite safe too. Most of it the armor is bulletproof and lightweight. You'll be able to run, if needed. It moves with you, so you'll be able to shoot your bow. Basically it's fully functional but will intimidate when needed. Of course, your inner strength will be what makes the nation quiver. Find it inside yourself. Think of your sister, think of your husband, think of your 11 year old self starving to death, but find whatever drives you on to find that strength. I know you can do this, Katniss. I didn't create your nickname because of your dress. You have a fire inside you, like Chase said. Unleash it." He went to his drawer and pulled something out, holding it in his palm.

"Chase designed this. Beetee made it, but Chase thought we should have another mockingjay pin made to match your uniform." Katniss took it from him and studied it. It looked identical to the one from her father except this one was black, like her outfit.

"Burned in the ashes of your flames," Cinna said firmly. "The ashes of your home. From the thousands of people lying where the bombs dropped on them. The Capitol tried to extinguish 12, Katniss, but they have no idea what kinds of flames they are about to face." He took the black bird and pinned it to her uniform.

"Alright, Girl on Fire. Time to get to work."

* * *

 _ **My apologies that it's another short one, guys, but my mom is having surgery this week and I will most likely be writing a fair bit while we are in the hospital! Have a great week!**_

 _ **XOXOX**_


	50. Chapter 50

After Cinna took some last minute measurements, Katniss took the uniform off and returned it to his closet.

"Why don't you head down to the armory? It might cheer you up a bit." So she set off to find it, which was why she was now wandering in circles.

District 13 was like a giant underground maze. She hadn't been many places except for the infirmary and her family's compartment. She had seen the dining hall once but she chose to eat her meals in her compartment where people weren't gaping at her. Today had been her first time actually walking around and she didn't like the way the soldiers straightened up when she came near. It was the same way the Peacekeepers had reacted around Peeta in 12. But she wasn't in a position of power like he had been nor did she deserve that kind of respect.

You're the Mockingjay, she had to remind herself. At least, they think you are.

"Katniss!" She whirled around, nearly falling to her knees at the sound of her name being cried by a familiar voice. Madge rushed forward to catch her and she bit her lip.

"Oh god, I'm sorry! I'm just happy to see you up and about! How are you feeling?"

"Better," she nodded. "I'm going to the armory but I have no idea where I am or where it is."

"We'll take you," Rye said, slipping his arm under hers for support. "We were just going back to our compartment for reflection."

"I don't want to take up your time."

"You're not, Katniss. Rye has been taking me to the armory for training everyday, anyway. Come with us."

"Training? What kind of training?"

"I want my girl to know how to use a blade and a gun," Rye said somberly, shooting Madge an anxious look. "I want her to know how to defend herself."

"Maybe you could even show us how to use a bow," Madge said softly.

"If I had one, I would. I'm sure my dad's bow was destroyed in 12."

"Well, let's get down there and see what we can find." She tried to straighten up as she walked between them; she didn't want them to think she was weak too.

* * *

The Victor, Beetee, she remembered, was sitting in a wheelchair when they entered. Katniss's eyes widened as she looked around at the variety of weapons they had. Could this be enough to defeat the Capitol?

"Ryen, I thought you said you and your wife couldn't make it today."

"I told him I need more training," Madge laughed. "How are you today, Beetee?"

"I think you underestimate yourself, Madge. I'm doing well, thank you. The leg is a little stiff but the doctors said I should walk again, with some physical therapy."

"What happened to you," Katniss asked abruptly. Beetee adjusted his glasses.

"District 3 was attacked, Mrs. Mellark. After the Capitol bombed your home, they attacked other districts as well. Snow is determined to squash the rebellion and will annihilate the districts to do it. I was caught in the aftermath, as my house came down on me. I was trapped under the rubble for almost two days." Madge and Rye shook their heads but Katniss was staring at something on Beetee's table.

"Is that a trident?"

"Ah," the Victor rolled backwards and picked up the weapon. "It's a special weapon I've been working on for Finnick. He volunteered for the rescue mission in the Capitol, so I wanted to have it done as soon as possible."

"Wait. Rescue mission? To save Peeta, you mean?"

"Yes. I thought you were aware that a mission had been organized."

"I know they've discussed it," she frowned. "But I didn't know people had volunteered."

"We all volunteered," Rye stepped forward. "Finnick Odair, Colonel Boggs, Gale Hawthorne, Rory Hawthorne, and me. Bing tried but we told him to stay here in case April has the baby."

"Ga- the Hawthornes volunteered?"

"Maybe we should talk about the mission at dinner. Beetee, I was hoping you could show Katniss what you've been working on." The Victor's face lit up and he nodded.

"Give me one moment. I'll be right back." He rolled off in a hurry and Katniss frowned after him.

"Special Weaponry," Rye explained. "Only certain individuals are allowed inside."

"Come with me," Madge breathed, taking Katniss's hand. "There's something you have to see." She lead her through the maze of the room, until they reached an enormous plate-glass window. Katniss's eyes widened as she leaned close, her breath leaving her. It was a replication of a meadow, with live trees and flowers, and hummingbirds flying around. Madge pulled her inside and Katniss inhaled sharply. She'd expected the air to feel muggy but it was cool and pleasant, with hummingbirds flitting all around her. It was the first time in 13 Katniss felt at peace. Madge watched her with a smile.

"I thought you'd like it here." Katniss breathed it all in and closed her eyes, her face tilted toward the ceiling. Rye joined his wife and draped his arm around her shoulders.

"Apparently, 13 has been studying their aerodynamics here for years. Forward and backward flight, and speeds up to sixty miles per hour. It's pretty incredible."

"It is," Katniss agreed.

"Think you could bring one of these down with an arrow?"

"I've never tried. Not much meat on them."

"No. And you've never been one to kill for sport. Still, I imagine they'd be tough to catch." Katniss turned in a circle, captivated by the tranquility of the room. She couldn't imagine how something so beautiful could be in this cold underground place. It reminded her of her meadow back home, and her heart started to sting. She remembered the last time she had been there; a picnic with Peeta shortly after their toasting. It seemed like a different lifetime ago, and it seemed like a different world now. She promised herself to bring him here when they rescued him. She had no idea what they were doing to him but she imagined he had been held in a cell with solid walls and not allowed to see the light. She hoped that was all they had done to him.

"There's Beetee," Rye broke the silence and Katniss followed him and Madge out of the room. Beetee wheeled back in with a tall, black rectangular case awkwardly positioned between his footrest and his shoulder. He came to a halt and tilted it toward Katniss.

"For you."

She set the case flat on the floor and undid the latches along one side. The top opened on silent hinges. Inside the case, on a bed of crushed maroon velvet, lay a stunning black bow.

"Oh," she whispered in admiration. Rye whistled appreciatively. Katniss lifted the bow carefully into the air to admire the exquisite balance, the elegant design, and the curve of the limbs that somehow suggested the wings of a bird extended in flight. There was something else, she noticed. She pressed it against her cheek and felt the slight hum travel through the bones of her face. She had to hold very still to make sure she wasn't imagining it. No, the bow was alive in her hands, she decided.

"What's it doing?" she asked in awe.

"Saying hello," explained Beetee with a grin. "It heard your voice."

"It recognizes my voice?" her jaw dropped.

"Only your voice," he replied. "You see, they wanted me to design a bow based purely on looks. As part of your costume, you know? But I kept thinking, what a waste. I mean, what if you do need it sometime? As more than a fashion accessory? So I left the outside simple, and left the inside to my imagination. Best explained in practice, though. Want to try those out?"

"But where-"

"Target range is just over here," Rye said with a grin. Katniss looked to where he was pointing and she felt excited chills. Beetee rolled over with them, indicating arrows on the table.

"They're all color coded, Katniss. Incendiary and explosives are over here, while the regular ones are here." He pointed each of them out and Katniss ran her hands over the colored shafts.

"To deactivate your bow, you just need to tell it good night and it will go to sleep."

"Show us what you've got, Girl on Fire," Rye said, crossing his arms and smiling.

"Rye, don't patronize her," Madge scolded him.

"I'm not. I'm excited to see her shoot. Dad used to buy her squirrels and he says she hit them right through the eye every time." Katniss picked up a black arrow and gripped the bow. She could feel it coming alive in her hands and she focused on a target a hundred yards away. Rye cursed out loud when she hit the target three times in a row.

"Holy shit, the Mockingjay can shoot! Does Peeta know you are that good?"

"He hasn't really seen me shoot either," she shrugged.

"He is going to flip his shit when he sees that. That was really something, Katniss, truly. Your aim is impeccable. I doubt even my superiors in 2 could have hit those targets. Madge, honey, you should be learning from her."

"Will you show me, Katniss," Madge asked, her eyes ablaze. Beetee showed Rye where he could find more bows and arrows, and Katniss moved Madge closer to the target.

* * *

They were all in good spirits when they left the armory, Rye gushing about his amazing wife hitting the target. Madge was pink but looked pleased. Katniss imagined the training also helped her keep her mind off of her parents. She hadn't asked her about it but she knew Madge was hiding her pain. From what Prim had told her, only the people who followed Haymitch and Gale into the woods that night had survived. Most were attacked with firebombs where they stood. Katniss could hardly believe the savagery of the Capitol. Apparently the Peacekeepers had all escaped in time. She hadn't been too joyous when Prim told her that part. But she vowed to find them before the war ended. She owed them for what they had done to her husband, after all.

"Do you want us to come with you to meet Heavensbee?" Katniss glanced at Madge, who was giving her a supportive smile.

"Will you?"

"Of course," she squeezed Katniss's hand. "Rye, if you want, I can meet you later at dinner."

"I don't mind escorting you ladies."

"We need some girl time," Madge nudged her husband. "I'll see you at dinner."

"I can see I'm not wanted," he huffed and winked. "See you girls later then."

"I feel like I haven't seen you or talked to you, you know, away from other people!" Madge slipped her arm under Katniss's and they slowly made their way back upstairs.

"Rye can't leave your side."

"I know," she sighed. "I think everything that has happened has made him… extra overprotective. Like he is trying to compensate for what happened in 12 and Peeta and-" she froze, her eyes widening. "Oh Katniss, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean that."

"It's ok," she said quickly. "I'm sure Peeta's capture is hitting him pretty hard too. I imagine that's why he volunteered to go to the Capitol."

"I wanted to ask him not to go but he's his brother. I can't possibly ask him to stay behind," Madge looked apologetic. "I'm sorry this has happened, Katniss."

"He's alive, Madge. I know he is."

"Of course he is. And he will come back to you soon." Madge lead her up to Cinna's apartment and knocked.

"I'm not sure where Heavensbee wants you to go but if Cinna is helping you-" she trailed off as Chase yanked the door open. Katniss could immediately see that it was a bad time. Chase's hair was standing on end as if he had been pulling at it and Cinna's eyes were red. But both men forced on a smile when they saw Katniss.

"Hi Katniss. It's good to see you up and about."

"That's what everyone says," she nodded toward Madge. "How are you doing, Chase?"

"Hanging in there. Um, I'd better go. My schedule says reflection… whatever that means," he held up his hand and showed them the schedule written over his wrist.

"It means some time to be alone and think," Cinna said behind him. "You've been here a month, babe, and you still don't understand reflection?"

"Time to be alone. Joy," Chase said under his breath. "I'd better get to it then. See you all." Katniss frowned after Chase while Madge's eyes darted around the corridor, uncertain as to where she should be looking.

"Um… what was that all about," Katniss asked Cinna.

"Oh nothing to worry about. Are you meeting with Plutarch about your propo video?"

"I guess so. I wasn't sure where to go."

"I can show you. I'll bring the suit so he can see the final product."

They followed him upstairs, towards the room Katniss had been in that morning. But they bypassed it and entered what seemed like a soundstage. Plutarch raised both hands in the air as a greeting.

"Mrs. Mellark and Mrs. Mellark! Welcome, ladies. Thank you for escorting them, Cinna. You are welcome to stay if you would like."

"I would just like to hear your ideas about Katniss's makeup and prep. I can pass it all on to Chase as well."

"Excellent. We will actually start filming tomorrow so let's all meet here at say, 10 am? How do you like the suit, Katniss?"

"It's amazing," she said, shooting Cinna a smile.

"Wonderful. Is that it, then?"

"I wanted you to see the final product," Cinna held the mockingjay outfit up for Plutarch to see.

"Truly spectacular, Cinna. You are very talented, indeed."

"Thank you sir."

"Well. Katniss, you will have one line tomorrow. If you would like to memorize it tonight, we will test it out with all of the effects tomorrow. The lighting, the smoke, the costume…. Everything." She nodded and accepted the sheet of paper from him. One line. It shouldn't be too hard.

Suddenly, everyone started running from the stage and Plutarch spun around.

"What's happening? What's going on?"

"Refugees spotted on the border," a soldier cried over his shoulder. "District 8, most likely."

"I thought District 8 was wiped out," Plutarch said under his breath.

"I'm sure there were survivors," Cinna said stiffly. Katniss rested a hand on his shoulder and he squeezed it.

"I didn't think Madame Coin was too keen on accepting more refugees."

"Where else would they go," Katniss asked angrily.

"Well you're right of course, Katniss, I just hope we can provide enough resources here. The new President Snow is fighting this rebellion with everything he has."

"What do you mean?" Katniss had not heard nor asked about the Capitol's response to the rebel forces. She hadn't even cared to know about the changes in the Capitol administration. As far as she was concerned, Caius Snow was no better than his father and nothing good could happen during his time in office.

"Panem's new president is power-hungry and blood-thirsty," Plutarch said with a frown. "He is slaughtering districts left and right if they do not agree to follow him. He even publicly executed several of his board members for objecting to his being in office. They protested that Aurelia Snow is the chosen successor and Caius has no claim to the position. After their execution, the rest of the board signed an agreement to serve and support the new president."

"He's blackmailing the whole country," Cinna shook his head.

"Worse that that, he's barely giving them a choice and murdering them if they choose incorrectly. The last President at least pretended to care for his country. Caius only cares about power and he will destroy Panem if he continues like this. When I say destroy, I mean literally. Exactly what happened to the other countries in the past, that is what awaits Panem."

"We have to stop this," Katniss whispered.

"Well that's where you come in. Our Mockingjay. I will see you tomorrow, bright and early, ready to film!" Plutarch clapped her shoulder and hurried off. Cinna sighed and clutched the uniform to his chest.

"Cinna...what if I can't do it?" He turned to her and she stared at the ground.

"The fate of the country is literally resting on my shoulders. It's not just my district. Not just my husband or sister or my neighbors in the Seam… it's the whole country. The rest of the world. What if I can't save them?"

"Katniss… you have to. I know you don't want the pressure but you heard what Plutarch said. We can't let him wipe Panem off the map like the past leaders of the world did."

"But how can I stop him?"

"You show the districts that we have power in numbers. They're afraid right now but someone needs to convince them to stand up to the Capitol. You're that person, Katniss." She shook her head and Madge stepped forward.

"Cinna's right, Katniss. I know you don't think you can do it but I have always respected you. A lot of people have. You're strong and brave and you can make people listen to you." She squeezed her hand and Katniss raised her eyes to her friend's.

"Well I'd better memorize this one line they've given me. Um, Cinna, do you want to join us for dinner tonight?"

"I'd love to but I told Chase we could eat together at his assigned table."

"Oh," Katniss tried to hide her surprise. "That's great! I thought… I was worried that… something had happened."

"We're fine," he said dismissively but she didn't miss the worried look in his eyes. He cleared his throat and gripped the uniform to his chest. "I'll just return this to my closet before dinner. And I'll see you here in the morning."

"I'll be here."

"Are you joining us for dinner tonight, Katniss?" Madge asked excitedly as they made their way back towards Cinna's compartment.

"I told Rye I would. I don't think it's a good idea though."

"Don't even worry about her," Madge shook her head. "She's been a witch to everybody. Even Bing can't cheer her up at this point. I really don't know what's going on with her."

"Her youngest son has been captured. Don't you think that would have an effect on her," Cinna asked lightly.

"If you knew Mrs. Mellark, you wouldn't have to ask that question," Madge said darkly. "She has always hated Peeta. Even when we were kids, she was awful to him. There were days when he, Delly, and I would be playing together and she would come out and drag him inside, her fingernails cutting him up! We were 6! She was yelling that he had work to do but what could a 6 year old do in a bakery?"

"Sounds to me like he dodged a bullet, being taken to District 2 to train as a peacekeeper. He got away from her."

"Even so, she likes you and April," Katniss muttered. "You're good, respectable Merchant women for her sons. More than she hates Peeta, she hate that he married someone from the Seam."

"Seam and Merchant? Does class really matter in 12?"

"It's gotten better over the years but yes, it was horrible. People from the Seam couldn't use the same restrooms as Merchants and for awhile, they were taught separately. The Capitol didn't want to taint the Merchant class. Only about twenty years ago, the rules became more lax and people didn't mind so much. Classes weren't segregated anymore. Marriages between classes weren't illegal anymore. Times have changed but if you look around the cafeteria you'll still see some Merchants edging away from Seam people."

"Wasn't your father from the Seam, Katniss?"

"He was. My mom was exiled from the Merchant side of town. Her own family refused to see her. All because she married a Seam man."

"Well, I suppose Peeta doesn't much care for the class differences," Cinna gave her a smile. "He said he's wanted to marry you since he was five."

"Peeta's never cared for the rules when Katniss is involved," Madge grinned.

"Yeah and look where that got him," Katniss replied somberly. "The Capitol's prisoner." Cinna and Madge were quiet. They reached Cinna's compartment and she sighed.

"I'll see you two later."

"Please come to dinner, Katniss," Madge pleaded. "Everyone wants to see you."

"Save seats for Mom, Prim, and me," she nodded, already walking off to her own floor. Cinna and Madge exchanged looks before letting themselves into their respective compartments.

* * *

There was a heavy knock at the door and the President's pen paused on the document.

"Enter," he said with an irritated sigh. The door creaked open and Snow grimaced. How had his father tolerated that squeaking? He made a mental note to call maintenance to take care of it.

"Antonius," he leaned back in his seat and threw the pen down. "Come in."

"Good day, Mr. President."

"I trust you come with news of the prisoner?"

"I do indeed, sir."

"And? I trust it is good news?" The Minister played with his hands in his lap.

"He is… indifferent to her. She has been taking care of him and it is clear that he will survive his injuries but he doesn't show any affection towards her. She feeds him memories but he does not react." Snow's face darkened and Antonius shrank back in his seat.

"Is she sticking to the story? Has someone confirmed she is doing as we asked?"

"She still wears the earpiece and she hasn't strayed. She fears for her child's life."

"Good. As she should. He does not believe it is his?"

"She hasn't yet told him she's pregnant, sir." Snow crossed his arms and turned to face the window.

"That's the next thing we do then. And has he mentioned her?"

"Not since the tracker-jacker attack, sir. We haven't heard him say her name in weeks."

"That's something at least. Perhaps it's time to up the stakes a little." Antonius's brow furrowed.

"Sir?"

"Get him into my office, Antoinus. I think it's time for the new Head Peacekeeper General to be awarded a mission."

* * *

 _ **Guys, I'm so sorry for the wait! My mom's surgery went well (thank you for all the sweet messages I've gotten!) but I've been super busy taking care of her and getting caught up at work! Hope you enjoy, and have a great week!  
**_

 _ **XOXOX**_


	51. Chapter 51

Katniss squeezed Prim's hand as they made their way to the cafeteria.

"Don't let her get to you, Katniss," her sister squeezed back. "You have every right to sit with your family. Don't let her make you think otherwise."

"I imagine they all blame me for Peeta's capture."

"None of them do," Prim said firmly. "So stop blaming yourself." Her sister knew her better than she knew herself, she decided. They hurried into the cafeteria and spotted the Mellarks off to the left. Rye waved them over and Madge scooted over to allow the sisters to sit.

"Katniss," April said brightly. "Prim! We are so happy you could make it." Katniss gave her a strained smile.

"How are you feeling, April," Prim asked, her inner healer taking over.

"Your mother has been so great since we got here! I feel better, knowing she will be here to help when the time comes. She's even been helping Bing and me with birthing classes, to help our breathing." Bing grinned as he kissed his wife's cheek.

"We're ready. And it should be soon."

"Any day now, your mother says," April nodded in agreement.

"Where is Violet," Bran asked, his brow raised. His wife shot him a glare as her nose wrinkled in disgust. He glanced sideways at her and tapped the table nervously. "She's just been working all day, I'm sure she's hungry."

"She's tending to the newest refugees. She said the soldiers will feed the doctors and nurses later, so don't worry about her."

"Should we save her something?"

"For gods sake, Bran, the woman will be fine," Mrs. Mellark snapped. Bran Mellark fell silent and Rye gave his mother a nasty look.

"So we saw Katniss shoot today."

"Oh my god, she's incredible," Madge jumped in. Katniss blushed and lowered her head.

"I'm alright," she mumbled to the table.

"She's better than alright," Rye shook his head. "The Capitol is in some serious trouble."

"I wonder where she could have refined such skills," Mrs. Mellark said as she picked at her plate. She reminded Katniss of a skinny bird, pecking at the food with a sharp beak. Her voice an annoying cawing and her talons sharpened to kill. Katniss imagined an arrow piercing the bird's breast and silencing it immediately.

She blinked when her mother-in-law waved her roll at her.

"She couldn't possibly have practiced at her home. Or school. So where-"

"You know good and well I went to the woods every day to keep my family alive," Katniss snarled. "And I'd appreciate it if you stopped treating me like something on the bottom of your shoe. I married your son, whether you like it or not. It has nothing to do with you. And I miss him just as much as you do. So quit being a bitch to me!" The table was silent; in fact, Katniss could swear the whole room had gone silent. But as soon as Mrs. Mellark stood up, the forks clinking and the chatter resumed.

"Let's go, Bran. I've suddenly lost my appetite. Something foul has disturbed my digestion."

"Mother," Bing shook his head. Mrs. Mellark placed her hands on the table and lowered her face in front of Katniss's.

"I told my son that bad things would befall him if he married the likes of you. He's getting his comeuppance."

"Don't talk to my sister that way," Prim said angrily. "You are a horrible woman and I don't know how your husband puts up with you!"

"Margaret, let's go," Bran jumped to his feet. "Let's GO," he dragged his wife out of the cafeteria, shooting the rest of his family apologetic looks. Rye shook his head and huffed.

"God I wish Dad would stand up to her."

"Ryen," Bing said quietly.

"What? Don't Ryen me, she's always been like that! But you didn't care because you were the favorite." Madge squeezed his hand and April gave her husband a nervous glance.

"Ryen, I tried to keep her away from you and Peeta. I really did. And so did Dad."

"She nearly killed him, Bing. Several times. He told me in 2. She hit him so hard she almost broke bones. Once she knocked him unconscious! Dad never stopped her."

"Rye," Madge said deliciate. "I don't think this is the time or place for this conversation."

"I'm sick of her acting like the victim. And I'm sick of Dad for just putting up with it."

"Putting up with what," someone belched behind them and Katniss spun around.

"Haymitch," Rye frowned. "What are you doing here?"

"Was just going to take my food back to my room but saw my favorite Mockingjay over here and it's been ages since I last saw that scowl."

"You just saw me this morning," she rolled her eyes.

"What did you think of Cinna's creation?" Haymitch bit off a piece of bread.

"It's amazing. And before you give me the speech about how I need confidence to pull this off, it's been done. Cinna and everyone else around here keeps me telling me the same thing."

"Katniss, do you know why Cinna and the rest of Ellie's team spent so much time with you?"

"Because you asked them to?"

"No. Because you carried yourself like a leader. You spoke like a leader. You even acted like a leader. Cinna said the whole academy was enchanted with you, because you treated them all like human beings, not just slaves."

"So?"

"So Snow doesn't see the citizens of Panem as human beings. He sees a country of slaves. You can turn it into a country of soldiers, all fighting for the same cause. Freedom. That's what they saw in you at the academy. That's what the Victors saw. It's why so many volunteered for the rebellion. Many of them hadn't made up their minds until that first night at Snow's mansion. Finnick came to me later on and said ten Victors told him they would join the fight. We all see something in you, Katniss. So try and find it the next time you look in a mirror, alright?" Katniss stared at the table while Haymitch soaked up his turnips with his bread.

"So, what was Ryen fuming about when I came over?"

"Never mind," Bing said through gritted teeth.

"Mom and Dad," Rye snapped.

"What about them?"

"Katniss just told Mom off and he just went back to their room with her. I don't get why he puts up with it, as Prim put it. He's put up with a lot over the years."

"More than you know," Haymitch nodded, lifting his cup to his lips.

"What do you mean," Rye asked, his eyes narrowing. Haymitch's eyes widened and started to cough as he realized what he had said.

"Jeez, those turnips are going right through me. I gotta go to the bathroom. Scuse me."

"Hey!" Rye made a grab for the Victor. "Spill it, Haymitch!"

"Night everyone," Haymitch mumbled before he practically ran from the room. Rye glared at his retreating back before sinking back in his seat.

"Wish I knew what that was all about."

"Probably just that your dad has endured your mother's mood swings and tempers," Madge scooted closer to him. "Haymitch isn't far from the bakery, so I'm sure he has seen things." Rye grunted as he drained his water.

"You finished?" Madge nodded and he took her hand.

"Sorry everyone. I think I just need some sleep. See you all in the morning." Katniss was about to speak when a loud siren pierced the air with an echoing wail.

"What is that," she asked in panic.

"An announcement," Madge muttered.

 _Good evening citizens of District 13 and our distinguished guests. Please assemble in the Collective at nineteen hundred hours. This is a mandatory gathering. Soldiers will be assisting with directions if needed. That is all._

People looked around in confusion, muttering about what the announcement could be about. Rye's eyes met Katniss's and he nodded.

"That's fifteen minutes. Let's go."

* * *

When they arrived they saw a huge portion of 13 had already arrived and were waiting nervously. The Collective was a huge room that could easily hold thousands. Katniss could tell it was built for a larger gathering, and perhaps it held one before the pox epidemic.

"There's Mom," Prim nudged her and she saw their mother leading a group of mobile patients, still wearing their hospital nightgowns and robes. Rory sidled up to them and slid his hand into Prim's.

"Why are we meeting here?"

"Katniss told Coin she would be her Mockingjay."

"Really?" Rory's eyes widened.

"I made her promise to give Peeta immunity if we win the war. And anyone else who might be considered traitors to 13."

"Felix Duartyr," Prim quietly explained. "Peeta's general from 2."

"And I want it in public, so there are plenty of witnesses."

"Makes sense," Rory nodded.

"She's also going to launch a rescue mission soon. They're going to get him out." Rory's expression was one of relief.

"I'm glad to hear that Katniss. I volunteered for the mission but hadn't heard anything. It will be good to get Peeta back here. We have been worried about you." Prim slapped his arm and Rory bit his lip.

"I mean, it would just be nice to see you smile again." Katniss nodded and fell silent, her eyes darting around the room. It was filling up fast, with people from 13 and people from different districts. The refugees from 8 looked defeated, some of them with tattered clothing and serious burns. She looked around, seeing who she recognized from 12. She hadn't seen Peeta's friend Delly Cartwright. She made a mental note to ask Madge about her after the meeting. The Hawthornes were gathered in the corner, Posy's arms wrapped around Gale's waist. She saw Thom and several other of Gale's miner friends. Some people she recognized from school. Not enough, she thought. There were too many faces missing.

Everyone was looking up and Katniss raised her eyes to the platform. Coin stepped out and bowed her head.

"Good evening. Thank you for disrupting your schedules for this announcement. Katniss Everdeen Mellark has consented to becoming the Mockingjay provided her husband, General Peeta Mellark of District 2 and District 12 Peacekeepers, will be granted full pardon for any damage he does to the rebel cause. This goes for other peacekeepers who will now be considered soldiers for the revolution. General Felix Duartyr and anyone else who joins our cause on their own accord. We will also be launching a rescue mission to the Capitol with four volunteers, lead by Colonel Boggs. In return for this service to her husband, the Mockingjay has agreed to begin filming propo videos tomorrow so we may officially launch the rebellion to Panem." Katniss scowled. Service? They had left him behind in the first place. And she could tell by the rumbling dissent from the crowd that no one doubted she would want to be the Mockingjay. Naming a price, one that spared possible enemies, angered them, she decided. She ignored the hostile looks thrown her way and stood her ground.

"But in return for this unprecedented request," Coin continued. "Soldier Everdeen has promised to devote herself to our cause. It follows that any deviance from her mission, in either motive or deed, will be viewed as a break in this agreement. The immunity would be terminated and the fate of the peacekeepers determined by the law of District Thirteen. As would her own. Thank you." Katniss swallowed. Coin's message was clear.

If Katniss stepped out of line she and Peeta would be executed as traitors.

* * *

"Katniss!" She whirled around at the voice and saw Finnick pushing through people to make his way over to her. He clung to the young red-haired Victor's hand. Annie, Katniss remembered. She looked to be in good spirits and she clung to Finnick tightly.

"Hello Finnick."

"I just wanted to check and see how you were doing," he said brightly. "I wanted to visit but I just… thought I would give you some time." He shrugged apologetically.

"I'm doing better, thanks," she said stiffly.

"Physically, maybe," he said knowingly. "But I know how you are on the inside."

"Oh you know do you?" Finnick gestured toward his and Annie's joined hands.

"Every time I had to leave her, I wondered if I'd ever see her again. Watching her fight in the arena, I held my breath the entire time, I think. I understand how it feels, Katniss. You can't give up hope. If Peeta is alive, and I'm certain he is, we will bring him home to you." Katniss's face softened and her shoulders slumped.

"Thank you, Finnick. I'm sorry. I just… I can't stand not knowing."

"I know," he nodded. "But I'm certain he is doing whatever he can to get back to you."

"He was hijacked once before. Made to forget who he is. Rye says he won't forget me but who really knows? The cruelty of the Capitol is unimaginable. I'm sure they will find a way."

"You're both really strong," Annie surprised her by reaching out and grasping her hand. "And Peeta is smart. Have faith, Katniss." She nodded and swallowed.

"Thanks… both of you. Finnick, Beetee says he has a surprise for you. Down in the armory." Finnick's eyes lit up.

"Well I'll have to pop down there in the morning. We will let you get some rest, Katniss. We just wanted to let you know you have our support." She nodded as the pair of them walked off together, hand in hand. Away from the Capitol, Finnick was a free man. He could now belong to only Annie.

Katniss allowed herself to smile as she walked back to her compartment.

* * *

She was awoken by a soft knocking and she could swear she had just gone to bed. She blinked over at the other bed to make sure Prim and her mother hadn't woken up. She grimaced as soon as her feet touched the cold floor and she shivered as she made her way over to the door. Haymitch's anxious face was on the other side.

"Haymitch," she whispered. "What time is it?"

"Almost three. I'm sorry to wake you but I just thought you should know. They're going to get him." She was immediately awake and she pulled the door closed behind her.

"They're leaving now?"

"Boggs has assembled them downstairs. They're hoping to sneak in while everyone is sleeping and get past their airfield space without any problems."

"Haymitch, I want to go with them."

"You need to stay here, sweetheart, so you can film those propos. Show Coin you are cooperating with her, so she won't have any reason to mistrust you or Peeta." She wanted to protest but she knew he was right.

"This will work, won't it Haymitch?" He pulled her into his arms and rested his chin on her head.

"He's alive, Katniss. And he's coming home to you."

* * *

Snow forced a smile as the photographer was finally- FINALLY- satisfied and he hurried back to his camera.

"Alright everyone. Big happy smiles! Three, two, one!" The flash made him squeeze his eyes shut and he rubbed his temples.

"Excellent. How about one of just the young lady?" Snow shot his daughter a quick look and frowned.

"What for?"

"Why sir, she's known for her beauty all throughout Panem. We would like to hang her portrait around the Capitol." Aurelia blushed and batted her eyelashes at the photographer.

"Maybe just one," she said sweetly. Snow moved from the chair to allow his daughter to sit down, and stood in the corner with his wife.

"They're treating like her the new ruler of Panem."

"Oh calm down, Caius. It's nice to see her smiling. She misses her grandfather terribly." His smile was strained as he nodded.

"Of course, my dearest. I just don't want her to get any false hopes, you understand. The Board has already been filling her mind with silly ideas of being President. I had to put a stop to that, of course."

"Of course," his wife said, looking bored. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw a man enter the room and his eyes widened.

"Won't you excuse me, Cassandra?" The First Lady was too busy inspecting her long nails to answer and he hurried across the room while the camera continued to flash.

"What the devil are you doing here," he hissed.

"You have been avoiding me, Mr. President. I can't reach Minister Antonius either. I'm starting to think you have no intention of paying me my dues."

"Get out of here, Thread. I am trying to look like a doting father and husband. I can't cater to fugitive peacekeepers."

"Fugitive?" The old peacekeeper scowled.

"You nearly killed Mellark," he growled. "Knowing full well what we had planned for him."

"You forget who got rid of Cray for you. And Murphy. And anyone else associated with the revolution. It wasn't easy, either, Mr. President. Murphy was well-liked. It was difficult to find someone willing to do the job. Took a lot of convincing."

"They couldn't even do that right," the President snarled. "You'd think they'd never have cut someone's tongue out before."

"They didn't, Caius. District 12 doesn't do those kinds of punishments. It's why you convinced your father to send me there, remember?"

"Be that as it may, you were strictly ordered not to kill the girl or Mellark."

"Minister Antonius ordered me to make sure Mellark was too incapacitated to help the girl," Thread hissed. "We knew he wouldn't allow her to be harmed, so the Minister said make sure he was weakened."

"Weakened and dead are very different things," the President snapped. "Your idiot soldiers nearly killed him. I have him locked up and he's still suffering from his wounds."

"Then don't blame me for him being close to death. If you wanted him alive, you would have released him and made sure he's gotten the proper care."

"Watch yourself, Thread. You're on thin ice as it is. Do not cross me." He started to turn away when Thread spoke again.

"I know the truth about the President's death." Caius froze and turned slowly on the spot.

"I beg your pardon?"

"I know he was murdered by your hand."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Minister Antonius has told me many things, sir. Perhaps it is the other way around. Perhaps YOU shouldn't cross ME." Snow approached Thread, his fists balled at his sides.

"Are you threatening me Thread?"

"No sir. Just reminding you that I am not as powerless as you think. I'll return to my hideout and I'm sure I will be hearing from you tomorrow. Isn't that right, Mr. President?"

"I'll call you in the morning," he said gruffly before spinning around and marching back to his family.

"Enough photographs," he barked at the photographer. "Aurelia, it is time for your lessons." Aurelia blew the man a kiss as she slid off the chair.

"Egeria," he called to his secretary and the woman hurried in, looking frantic. "I need to see Minister Antonius. Immediately."

"Minister Antonius has been trying to reach you all morning, sir," her voice trembled. "He says something has gone wrong with the prisoners, and he-"

"Prisoners," he cut her off. "What prisoners?"

"I'm afraid I don't know, sir," she said anxiously. "Shall I tell him to call you?"

"Get him in my office. Now."

The President stormed into his office and yanked at his tie. His phone started to ring and he scowled at it.

"What?" he barked into it.

"I'm sorry, Mr. President, but the Minister is on the phone and he says he needs you to come-" Snow pushed a button, disconnecting his call with his secretary.

"Antonius, where the hell are you? I need to see you in my office. Immediately."

"And I need you to come to the laboratory immediately, Mr. President." Snow's face darkened even more.

"What have you done?"

"We received a fresh batch of tracker-jacker venom this morning. It is being injected into Mellark now."

"Why are you injecting him with more venom," the President asked angrily. "He has already had an overdose."

"Apparently it wasn't enough. He asked about the girl this morning."

"He asked who?"

"His supposed-wife. He said he was confused but he remembered his real wife. She tried to deny it but he tried to get away from her. The soldiers are getting her out of his system once and for all."

"If you kill him, I will kill you, Antonius."

"He is strong, Mr. President. He can handle the torture."

"He shouldn't HAVE to! I told you last week, we need him on our side! And now you are torturing him again! Stay right there, Antonius. I'm on my way. And cease the torture."

"But sir-"

"DO NOT QUESTION ME, ANTONIUS!" He slammed the phone down and gritted his teeth.

"Idiots," he muttered as he stomped flat-footed from the room.


	52. Chapter 52

When he arrived to the laboratory, he could see the young peacekeeper tied to a tilted chair, his face white as a sheet under bruises and blood. Snow exhaled loudly.

"Where is Antonius?" The doctors quivered in the corner.

"The Minister went to get the General's wife, Mr. President."

"Release him."

"Sir?" Snow whirled around and bared his teeth.

"Did I stutter? Release him. Now."

"Yes, Mr. President." They rushed forward and worked at Peeta's binds, allowing him to sway before he toppled forward. Snow held an arm out to support him before he could fall to the ground.

"Easy Mellark." Peeta blinked at the president and frowned.

"I… don't understand," he wheezed. There was no doubt his ribs were bruised, possibly even broken, from the savage beatings.

"This wasn't supposed to happen, Mellark. I'm sorry. I promise we will deal with the people who did this to you." He lowered Peeta into a chair and snapped his fingers. The doctors hurried toward Peeta and started to clean him up. Peeta frowned, trying to focus.

"Who are you?"

"I'm the President of Panem. Caius Snow. Do you know your name?"

"P…" he frowned, his mouth trying to form the word. He searched his brain for the name. HIS name. Why had he forgotten?

He looked desperate and the President patted his shoulder.

"It's alright. You've been through a terrible ordeal. Your name is Peter Mellark, General of Panem."

"What happened to me?"

"Rebel forces almost killed you. You were brought here for healing but they mistook you for a prisoner," he shot the doctors a glare. "But we will get you the medical treatment you need. You'll be better in no time."

"Rebel forces?" Peeta's brow furrowed. "I don't understand."

"There's a war going on at the moment, General. You were fighting on the front lines when she attacked you. She tried to kill you."

"She?"

"The Mockingjay is what they call her. She's a witch and we don't even speak her name. She's bloodthirsty and vicious, and kills for sport. She has been murdering Panem citizens by the thousands."

"Someone has to stop her," Peeta said weakly.

"I have no doubts you will, General. First we need to get you better. Come with me." Peeta's legs shook as he followed the president into an elevator, which lead into the presidential mansion. A laboratory right under someone's house? It seemed a little out of place to Peeta.

The President lead Peeta down a winding hallway until they stopped in front of a gold door.

"This will be your room while you stay with us."

"Stay here?"

"Well of course. I want you to heal quickly and I can provide the best treatment possible in the comforts of my own home." He twisted the knob and pushed the door open. Peeta's eyes widened at the opulence. Wasn't he used to this though? The President had called him General. Surely he was used to these luxuries.

He shook his head and took a step into the room. His side ached and he found it difficult to breathe. He wrapped an arm around himself and steadied himself against the wall.

"I'll bring your wife to you and then a doctor will stop by to check your injuries. There are fresh towels in the closet if you wish to bathe."

"I… I have a wife?" The President gazed at him with sympathy.

"What has that monster done to you," he shook his head. "She must have cast a spell over you. Made you forget your life. Not to worry, General. You are safe with us and we will do what we can to restore your memory." Peeta nodded, still looking confused and miserable.

"I hope it won't take too long."

"Lavinia will help you."

"Who?"

"Your wife," the President said gently. "My friend Antonius took her to see the doctor for a check up."

"Is she sick?"

"No, dear boy. She's pregnant. You're going to be a father. You can't even remember that?" Peeta pressed his palms to his temples and moaned.

"My wife is pregnant? Why wouldn't I remember?"

"It's alright. Once you are better, you will help us capture the Mockingjay." His head snapped up as two people entered the room.

"Right on time," Snow said with a smile. "Peter, your wife. Lavinia, please help Peter clean up and I will send a doctor straight up to tend to his injuries."

"Yes President Snow," Lavinia said, her head lowered. Antonius gave her a little push forward and she nearly stumbled into Peeta.

"Are you ok," he stammered.

"Yes," she pushed a strand of dark hair behind her ear. "Thank you."

"Please rest, Mr. and Mrs. Mellark. We will be in touch soon. If you require anything, ring the bell. My servants will attend you." Snow closed the door behind him and Antonius. Peeta swallowed, glancing at Lavinia. The room was thick with tension and Peeta rocked on the balls of his feet.

"I think I'm going to take a bath," he finally said.

"Should I bring you anything," she asked, not meeting his eyes.

"No, I'm fine. Thank you though." He reached out to touch her but his hand froze. "The President says I was attacked and I've forgotten a lot of things about my life. I'm sorry that I don't remember you. I hope you'll help me get my memories back." He saw her rub her pregnant belly.

"Of course. We will be fine." Before he could say anything else, she hurried away from him and into the bedroom.

* * *

Snow closed the door and turned to Antonius, his eyes glittering.

"Sir, before you get angry-"

"I'm past angry, Antonius. You disobeyed my orders. I told you the torture has been too much. He was starting to forget. It wasn't necessary to keep going. You could have killed him this time."

"He said the girl's name. He asked where she was and why she hadn't come to see him. We used a very low dose this time, just enough to incite panic rather than making him forget everything."

"Bullshit. He has forgotten everything. Hijacking is supposed to condition someone to fear something, not forget completely. But, fortunately for you, him forgetting works in our favor, so I will spare your life this time." Antonius exhaled and Snow jerked his head down the hall.

"No more torture. I want Mellark to think he's one of us. When he's ready, we will send him out to destroy her."

"You believe he will?"

"We can make him hate her, Antonius. We can make her seem like a threat. To him, to his wife… to their child. Since he can't remember anything, it's a clean slate. We will fill in the blanks for him. You just make sure that the girl doesn't slip."

"Oh she won't. We threatened her baby with the same thing we did to her husband. She may be from 12 but she's not stupid."

"What about the other soldier? Is he still alive?"

"He's not talking. I'm tempted to cut his tongue out myself."

"And then we would know absolutely nothing about the rebellion," Snow snapped. "You have a habit of burying people before they're dead. Make him talk, Antonius. You have ways."

"He's stubborn, Mr. President. And loyal to the rebellion."

"And does he have family?"

"None that we can find."

"Find another way then. I want to know what they're planning. What that District 13 fool hopes to accomplish with her little Mockingjay."

"Yes sir."

"It seems we also have General Thread to worry about as well." Antonius stopped in the middle of the hall.

"Sir?"

"He came to see me earlier and says that you have been telling him things. He threatened me, and I don't take kindly to threats, Antonius."

"Of course sir, but-"

"Get rid of him," Snow said through gritted teeth. "He knows too much."

"President Snow, Romulus Thread has been very valuable and could be-"

"Get rid of him, Antonius, or I will have to get rid of you." Antonius swallowed.

"I'll take care of it sir." Snow nodded and stomped off, leaving the Minister glaring at his retreating back.

* * *

Peeta sighed and closed himself in the bathroom, glancing at the luxurious bathtub.

"Your life will be different here. I'll see to that." He heard his own voice speaking the words in his head and he frowned. He shook his head as he leaned over to turn the water on. The shower came on and he jumped back.

"You could join me," he heard a soft voice say. He whirled around, searching for his wife but didn't see her anywhere. Strange. His brow furrowed as he stripped his clothes off and tossed them aside. They were mostly covered in blood anyway. He surveyed his own body and his eyes widened. The President hadn't been lying when he'd said Peeta had been through a terrible ordeal. His torso was completely black and blue, some bruises fresher than others. He was filthy, though he supposed that was from fighting a war. He shook his head and leaned over to press one of the buttons on the wall. A very strong aroma filled the air and he hurriedly punched it, hoping it would shut off. He gagged at the smell of roses and wafted his hand through the air. The tub filled quickly and he released a small moan as he lowered his battered body into the steaming water. He racked his brain for anything to tell him about who he really was. He had come to while soldiers were kicking the shit out of him and he had pleaded to know what he had done. As he was being kicked and beaten, one of the doctors in a white coat had stuck him with needles and whatever they had injected him with made him want to scratch his skin off. He couldn't remember anything before that though. He couldn't understand why he was being beaten, or who these people were. For a frightening moment, he hadn't even known who he was.

Peter Mellark, he reminded himself. That's what the President had said. A Peacekeeper General in Panem's army.

A knock at the door broke him from his thoughts and he sat up straight.

"Yes?"

"Peter, it's me," the door cracked open and Lavinia stepped inside. "They sent up some lavender for your bath."

"Oh, uh, thank you. I'll take it." She pushed the door open a bit more and leaned around the corner, stretching her arm out toward him. His brow furrowed when he saw her eyes were squeezed shut. Perhaps she was extremely shy? They were having a baby together, though. He felt more and more frustrated that he couldn't remember anything. He grabbed the package from her fingers and nodded.

"Thank you." She nodded and stepped back out of sight.

"They also sent some salve for your injuries. The doctor should be on his way up. Do you need help with your bath?"

"I'm fine," he mumbled. "Thank you." She shut the door again and he leaned against the wall. Had he done something to her to make her wary of him? Was he not a good husband? She had yet to meet his eyes, so he didn't even know what color they were!

Grey, a voice in his head said. More like molten silver.

He sighed and dumped the package of fragrance into the water. His muscles were instantly soothed, his pain fading away. He brought a cloth to his skin and gently wiped at his chest. The water turned red from his blood and he winced.

"I hate seeing you with marks on your skin," he heard the voice from earlier. He sat up, eyes wide, and looked around the bathroom. He was alone, just as he knew he was but the voice sounded like someone was sitting right beside him in the bath.

"You said my kisses can heal you," came the voice again. It was soft and gentle, and sent shivers down his spine. "They're gone. Never happened."

"Who are you," he whispered. There was another knock and he huffed.

"Peter, the doctor is here."

"Be right out," he called, reaching for a towel and struggling to his feet. He still found it hard to breathe and clutched his abdomen in pain.

"You're a Peacekeeper General," he told himself bitterly. "Buck up and stop acting like this. The President is counting on you." He wrapped the towel around his waist and went to meet the doctor.

* * *

The Minister was waiting with the doctor and his wife and Peeta nodded to all three of them.

"Peter, I was hoping to have a word with your wife while the doctor examines your injuries. We won't be long."

"Oh, of course." Antonius held the door open.

"After you, my dear." She glanced back at Peeta with what he swore was fear in her eyes, before she disappeared through the door.

"Now then, General Mellark, let's have a look at those ribs. Lie back for me," the doctor gently pushed Peeta into the couch cushions and he nearly yelped when the doctor brought his freezing stethoscope to his bare chest. The man poked and prodded with gloved fingers and Peeta bit down on his tongue to keep from crying out.

"Bruised ribs," the doctor muttered. More like broken, Peeta thought bitterly. "Multiple contusions to the head." From my own soldiers beating the shit out of me.

"And your back has not healed from the beatings the rebel soldiers gave you. We will need to transport you to the medical center, to make sure there is no lasting damage."

"Ok, but what are these tiny holes," he indicated the marks he had found on his hands and neck.

"Bullet wounds," the doctor said dismissively without looking at him.

"That's… a tiny bullet."

"Yes, a rebel tactic, to maim but not kill. I will inform the president you need transport. In the meantime, I will leave these for the pain. Take care, General." Peeta blinked at the door through which the doctor disappeared. He had left so fast Peeta hadn't had a chance to say a word. He gripped the small bottle of pills the doctor had shoved into his hand, and he frowned at the bottle.

"That was… strange." Since the pain was still fairly intense, he found a glass to run some water, and he popped one of the pills into his mouth.

"Never put anything from a stranger in your mouth. You never know about an assassination attempt until you are dead." He frowned at the voice. It was gruff and sharp, full of authority. Perhaps his superior?

He set the glass on the table and gripped his head with both hands.

"Where are all of these voices coming from? Just go away!" He shook his head and rubbed his face roughly. He decided sleep would do him good so he went to the bedroom, where he found a pile of clothes waiting for him on the bed. He quickly changed into a pair of underwear and a loose pair of grey pants before he fell onto the bed and was lost in the comfort.

* * *

"You just remember your duty," Minister Antonius snapped. "For the sake of your child."

"I understand, Minister. I told you I understood the last time you threatened my child. I will keep up pretenses and make sure he believes your story."

"Your story, dearest. I don't want to hear you crying for that worthless peacekeeper anymore, do you understand? Peter is your only husband. That child inside you will have a Capitol pedigree. I rescued you, did I not? I saved you from the soldiers who killed your husband, and who would have killed you too. How will you show your thanks?"

"By living the new life you provide," she said without emotion.

"Very good. You are a Capitol woman now. A General's wife. You will play the part, or we will kill you and your child. If Peter mentions that girl's name, you inform me immediately."

"You have put so much of that poison inside him that he can't remember his own name," she said bitterly. "So why do you worry so much, Minister?"

"Because one slip of the tongue could bring everything back. And President Snow has forbidden any more venom to be used on him. So we have to hope this time it works. The last time we weren't so lucky, even with you caring for him in the cells. His memory came back."

"I had nothing to do with that," she protested.

"You'd better not. Now get back in there and play the role you've been assigned. We need to keep up all pretenses until he's well enough to fight. Then we can unleash him on the rebel force."

"You're sending him after Katniss," she said quietly. "To kill her." She cried out as the Minister buried his hand in her hair.

"You speak that name again," he growled in her ear. "And I will make sure you never see your child."

"Yes, Minister Antonius," she whimpered, cradling her stomach. He released her and she took a step back. He scoffed and stomped off, leaving her alone in the hall. She choked back tears as her hands covered her stomach.

"I hope you somehow come out with red hair, my sweet little one," she whispered. "You only have one daddy. It's not the man who helped make you and it's not the man in there. I hope you have red hair and dimples and a kind smile and a loving heart. So the truth can be shown, one way or the other." She took a deep breath before returning to the bedroom, where she would be forced to once again forget about her real husband and help make sure a man could never remember his real wife. Sighing miserably, she twisted the knob and walked inside.

* * *

 _ **So, things starting to make sense a little more now? ;)**_

 _ **Have a great week everyone! XOXOX**_


	53. Chapter 53

Katniss was absentmindedly shredding a paper in her lap while Plutarch droned on and on about the importance of propos. Cinna seemed to be the only one listening. Chase's elbow slipped on the table and he blinked, convincing Katniss that he had fallen asleep. Haymitch slammed a hand on the table, making everyone jump.

"Can we move this along, Plutarch, before the Mockingjay dies of old age? We know how important these things are. So let's start filming." Plutarch looked flustered but Coin looked grateful.

"I agree. Plutarch, go ahead and begin. I'm needed in Command. I shall see you later, Katniss. Good luck." Coin excused herself quickly and Katniss watched the door shut with a pang of jealousy.

"Well then, Chase, Cinna, are we finished with her make-up?"

"I did as you asked, Plutarch," Chase said uncertainly, turning back to Katniss. "But are you sure-"

"She looks fabulous," the game-maker exclaimed. "Come over here, Katniss." He dragged her over to the soundstage, where she stood for what seemed like hours as they adjusted the lighting and smoke levels and later on, her hair and makeup. She was starving and irritated by the end of it, when Plutarch dragged her over to the monitor. They played the last few minutes of the taping and Katniss watched with wide eyes. The woman on the screen seemed larger and more imposing, with a smudged yet sexy face. Her brows were darkened and sharp, the way Chase had done, and smoke rose from her clothes, giving the impression that she was about to burst into flame. Katniss didn't recognize herself in the slightest.

Haymitch chuckled behind her.

"They'll either want to kill you, kiss you, or be you." She shot him a scowl while Plutarch pointed out certain aspects. He clapped his hands and rubbed them together, looking excited.

"Alright Katniss, got that line memorized?" She nodded, walking back to the soundstage. Plutarch hurried after her, describing the battle she has been in and gesturing toward all the dead soldiers at her feet.

"Rally the living, Mockingjay! Let's have smoke! Excellent, quiet on set! And action!" Katniss rose the bow over her head, her arm feeling stiff.

"People of Panem, we fight, we dare, we end our hunger for justice!" The words tasted bitter in her mouth. The silence was deafening. She continued to hold her bow up, her arm shaking.

Someone cleared his throat.

"And that, my friends, is how a revolution dies."

* * *

Plutarch all but pushed everyone out of the room, telling them to go eat lunch or meditate or whatever. He looked thoroughly put out, and Katniss knew Haymitch's words were true. She wasn't a motivational speaker. All of the glitz and glam, the smoke and costumes and makeup, couldn't make a Mockingjay. Haymitch tried to talk Plutarch down while Cinna tugged Katniss out of the studio.

"Don't despair, Katniss," he said softly. "That's a tough line to make sound believable."

"It's Capitol bullshit," Chase scoffed. "It's stiff and without emotion. Let her actually say things that people want to hear! That's what her father did."

"Chase," Cinna scolded softly.

"He's right though," Katniss sighed. "I was awful. The line is awful. And I don't look like me."

"Haymitch will fix it," Cinna squeezed her hand. "He was there for your father's propos. He can talk some sense into Plutarch."

Katniss sat down with her bowl of turnip soup but she merely picked at it. She couldn't eat anything until there was news from the rescue team. They had left early this morning and there was still no word.

"You need to eat, Katniss," Cinna said gently, pushing a piece of bread toward her.

"Not hungry," she muttered.

"I'm not either, for this stuff," Chase wrinkled his nose.

"Chase," Cinna rolled his eyes. "It's what they eat. At least they aren't starving." Chase hummed as he sipped at his soup and Cinna gave Katniss a kind smile.

* * *

After they finished eating, they headed back to the studio to see what they needed to do. Plutarch was nowhere to be found and Chase raised a brow.

"Did he off himself somewhere?"

"He's speaking to Coin," Haymitch muttered. "We are going to gather in Command in a little while to discuss the propo."

"Oh joy, you're inviting more people to see how terrible I was," Katniss scowled.

"I'm inviting people who know you, to show Plutarch that you can't be coached. It has to come from you. Like it did from Ash. As a Capitol producer, he doesn't understand that. We have to get you out of the studio."

"And what? Toss her into combat? Coin will never go for that," Chase scoffed.

"They won't be able to guarantee her safety, Haymitch," Cinna said gently.

"You'd never be able to guarantee my safety," Katniss broke in. "I want to go. I'm no help to the rebels here." Haymitch held out his hands as if saying "see?" Cinna patted her shoulder.

"What about Peeta? What if he comes home to find you're not here?"

"We haven't heard anything from the rescue team," Katniss exhaled deeply. "And it's not like I'll be gone long. Just long enough to film a real propo."

"It's what I have in mind, sweetheart, but we still need approval from Coin. Let's head over to Command."

* * *

A variety of people had assembled in Command. Coin and five of her soldiers sat around the table, while Plutarch and Effie Trinkett sat on the other side. Two stylists from the boutique were there but Ellie Trinkett was still missing. There were quite a few District 12 citizens, including Vick Hawthorne and Greasy Sae. There were several Victors also in attendance, who sat by themselves in the corner. Annie Cresta, Beetee, Johanna, Arcadia, and Haymitch's friend Chaff. Katniss's heart sank when she saw so many people in the room. She didn't want all of these people to see her terrible acting.

Haymitch took a moment to welcome everyone, which somewhat surprised her. She expected Coin to take command of the meeting but she didn't seem to want to stop Haymitch. He showed the footage that she had shot that morning and she sank low in her seat. She could have sworn Johanna was smirking at her. Haymitch cleared his throat when it was over.

"All right. Would anyone like to argue this is of use to us in winning the war?" No one did. "That saves time. So, let's all be quiet for a minute. Many of you have known Katniss for a long time. Some of you have only just met her recently. I want you to think of a moment when Katniss Everdeen genuinely moved you. Before she became Katniss Mellark, tell me something that she did or said that you were impressed by." Madge's hand tentatively rose into the air and Haymitch nodded at her.

"Her sister… Prim got very sick, and Katniss volunteered to marry a peacekeeper, to get her money for medicine. Prim would have died had Katniss not agreed to get married." Haymitch nodded and scribbled on a notepad.

"Saves sister's life," he muttered as he wrote. "Excellent. Anyone else?"

"She always brought her game to me to put into soup," Greasy Sae spoke up. "She was always trying to feed the district, even when there wasn't enough food for her own family." Sae cast Katniss a grateful nod, which Katniss returned.

"That soup saved several families that winter," Haymitch said seriously as he wrote. "Somebody else."

"The way she took care of my brother," Bing said gruffly. "She refused to let anyone take care of her, she was just focused on him."

"She saved my baby sister last fall," Vick said, which surprised Katniss. "Posy got lost and it was raining hard. Katniss found her and found a cave for them to hide in until the storm stopped. She wrapped Posy in her own coat and kept her warm all night. She kept her alive." Katniss listened to the stories, wanting to break in and protest. None of this had anything to do with a rebellion. It was all things anyone would have done, she reasoned. Anyone would have helped.

Haymitch held up the notepad. "So the question is, what do all of these have in common?"

"No one told her what to do or say," Johanna said from the corner. Katniss's wide eyes fell on the Victor. "They were her moments. Unscripted."

"Like a tribute," Arcadia said softly. "She does what she has to survive but once you are in the arena, you follow your instincts. No one can tell you what to do. Katniss is like a Victor."

"I wouldn't go that far," Johanna mumbled. "But it does sound like she has helped quite a few people out of tough spots. And I saw her stand up to Finnick in the Capitol. She's got some spunk." The Victor winked at Katniss and she felt even more confused.

"What is your point here, Haymitch," Plutarch said impatiently. "This is all very nice but not helpful. Unfortunately, her opportunities for being wonderful are rather limited here in Thirteen. So unless you're suggesting we toss her into the middle of combat, which is of course, ridiculous-"

"That's exactly what I'm suggesting," says Haymitch. "Put her out in the field and just keep the cameras rolling. Every time we coach her or give her lines, the best we can hope for is okay. It has to come from her. That's what people will respond to."

"How do you know this," a soldier from 13 spoke up.

"Because it's what her father did. Ash was the Mockingjay, because he didn't read a script or spread make-up on his face to look dirty. Ash worked in the mines and he knew how difficult life was. His words were real. His daughter has struggled to survive all her life. She knows what it is like, to be a citizen of Panem. We have all known struggle. Yes, even Victors," he added nastily as one of the soldiers from 13 scoffed. "You forget, soldier, that we all came from our own districts before the Capitol plucked us from our homes and families. I have Seam blood running through these veins and no amount of Capitol transformations will change that. Even Cinna, who is worshipped in the Capitol, came from the districts. It's time to remind the people of Panem of that. The districts need to stand up to the Capitol and to Snow. And we have the power to do it. We just need a compelling voice to convince them of that."

"Where could you send me," Katniss stood and stepped toward Haymitch. Haymitch was about to speak when Coin cleared her throat.

"This is madness. What if you're killed?"

"Make sure you get some footage. You can use that anyway." Coin huffed and crossed her arms.

"Fine. But let's take it one step at a time. Find the least dangerous situation that can evoke some spontaneity in you." She walked around Command, studying the illuminated district maps that showed the ongoing troop positions in the war. "Take her into Eight this afternoon. There was heavy bombing this morning, but the raid seems to have run its course. I want her armed with a squad of bodyguards. Camera crew on the ground. Haymitch, you'll be airborne and in contact with her. I would prefer to wait until Colonel Boggs returns, but we really need to get some kind of footage. Let's see what happens there. Does anyone have any other comments?"

"Wash her face," Chaff spoke up. Everyone turned to him, Coin with a frown. "She's still a girl and you made her look thirty-five. Feels wrong. Like something the Capitol would do."

"Clean yourself up and report to the hangar then, Soldier Mellark," Coin nodded to Katniss before sweeping out of the room, her soldiers following close behind. Haymitch started to follow but Katniss grabbed his arm.

"Has there been any news?" His face softened and he shook his head.

"Nothing. I'm sorry, Katniss."

"What if I've lost him? What if I've lost these women their husbands? Madge, Annie, Boggs's wife-"

"You can't think like that, Katniss," he stopped her. "These are all highly trained soldiers. Finnick is a Victor and Ryen is a peacekeeper. They will be fine."

"Then where are they," she said miserably, her eyes on the door.

* * *

"If you don't start talking, I'll put a bullet in your head," Gale snarled as he slammed the doctor against the wall.

"Gale," Boggs said loudly, looking more exasperated than anything else. "That's enough."

"We know he knows something about Peeta, Colonel. He's already said so. We're wasting time here and frankly, I'm surprised and a little worried that we haven't been attacked yet. We need him to talk."

"Soldier Hawthorne, step away from the prisoner. I want you to keep look out with Soldier Mellark. Understand?"

"Yes Colonel," Gale grunted, shooting the doctor a hateful glare as he stomped off.

"Barbarian," the doctor muttered as he straightened his coat.

"Yes, I imagine that's what most Capitolites think of us district folk," Boggs said gruffly. "But since I kept my soldier from murdering you, you owe me."

"I owe you nothing you rebel scum!"

"Just tell me what you've done with Peeta Mellark. That's all we want."

"Peeta Mellark is dead," said a voice behind them. The doctor started to run but Boggs knocked him to the ground and turned slowly. He didn't recognize the man with his sallow skin and his baggy suit. He looked like he had suddenly lost a good amount of weight from the way his clothes hung off his frame. His eyes were bloodshot and he had a strange twitch. Boggs frowned.

"And who are you?" The man laughed.

"Well that proves you are not from the Capitol. Everyone here knows me."

"Good for them. Answer the question."

"Antonius," he swept into a mock bow. "Minister of Defense of Panem."

"Alright Minister Antonius. Tell me where Peeta is."

"Are you deaf, man? I told you he's dead."

"I don't believe it," Boggs said calmly. "You would have broadcast his death, as he is a prominent peacekeeper and a general at that. Just tell me where he is and we will leave you alone."

"Colonel Boggs!" Both men whirled around at the sound of the shout outside the door. Gunshots followed immediately after and Boggs winced. The doors burst open and Gale and Finnick ran in.

"Peacekeepers attacking, Colonel!" Boggs spun back around to glare at the Minister.

"General, the rebels are in here," Antonius cried out.

"Bar the doors," Boggs yelled, running forward. Gale, Finnick, and Rory stood in the doorway, yelling for Rye to get inside. Antonius tried to sneak away but Boggs pulled out his rifle and pointed it at the Minister.

"Stay right where you are, Minister. We're not finished talking."

"I think you are," said a deep voice. Another door on the side had opened and a tall blonde man stood with his rifle pointing at Boggs. Rory's jaw dropped.

"Peeta?" Peeta hesitated only for a moment before lifting his chin.

"It's Peter, actually. And you rebel scum are trespassing."

"I told you he'd be one of them now," Gale hissed. Rory shook his head.

"Peeta, you don't remember us?"

"Cease your babble, soldier. Lest I cut out your tongue and feed it to the mutts in the room right next to us."

"Speak like that to my brother again, Mellark, and I'll cut YOUR tongue out and give it to Katniss as a gift." Peeta's brow furrowed.

"Who is Katniss?"

"Abort mission," Boggs said. "Hovercraft one, do you copy?"

"We can't abort mission," Rory threw his hands into the air. "Katniss will kill us!"

"Rory's right, we need to take him with us."

"Be my guest," Boggs waved his hand toward Peeta, who still gripped his rifle tightly.

"Don't just stand there, General. Shoot them!" Peeta took in the whole scene. The enemy's rifles were pointed at himself and the Minister. His rifle was directed at what seemed to be the leader but they were still outnumbered. Unless his soldiers made it inside the lab, he wouldn't be able to disarm the rebels without getting shot in the process.

"What do you want," he finally spoke. "Why have you come here?"

"To rescue you," Gale said roughly. "To take you back to your wife."

"My wife? My wife is upstairs. Try again." Gale glanced at Finnick.

"This isn't working. We need to go."

"Ryen! Get over here!"

"Little busy at the moment," Rye yelled over his shoulder, firing at the peacekeepers to keep them at bay.

"Get your ass over here, Mellark," Gale yelled, running over to take Rye's place. His eyes widened in horror when he saw his brother and his armed rifle.

"Peeta."

"That sounds like some kind of bread," the General wrinkled his nose. "My name is Peter. And I'm giving you one last chance to leave this place."

"Shoot them dead, General," Antonius gritted his teeth.

"We're still outnumbered, Minister. It would do no good for both of us to die today."

"Peeta," Rye sounded desperate. "We're here to rescue you."

"Rescue me? What could you possibly be rescuing me from?"

"This isn't right," Rye shook his head. "This can't be happening. Not again."

"Grab him and take him with us," Gale suggested. Rye's eyes met Peeta's and he sighed.

"He's too strong. And they've taken him over. We need to get back to 13 and tell Katniss what's happened."

"Make for the roof," Boggs barked. Rye gave Peeta one last sad look.

"We'll come back for you, Peeta. I know you're still in there somewhere. Don't forget us. Don't forget her." Peeta raised his rifle and fired at his brother but Rye dodged the bullet.

"Let's GO," Boggs yelled at his soldiers. They took off out of the lab and Antonius stamped his foot.

"Damn it, Mellark. You let them escape. President Snow will be furious about this." Peeta's eyes drifted upwards.

"They arrived by hovercraft, didn't they," he said to no one in particular. He rushed to the door and shoved it open. "Peacekeepers, follow me."


	54. Chapter 54

_Two and a half weeks earlier…_

Peeta squeezed his eyes shut as he rested on his stomach, the medical team surrounding him and leaning over him. They were discussing what to do about the injuries on his back. It seemed that they had been stitched closed already but his recent beatings had caused him to start bleeding and they were concerned about infection. Of course, no one said this directly to him. He might as well have been a corpse, for how much attention they were paying to him.

"Look, can you gentlemen stop chattering like a flock of birds and just do something to help me heal? Stitch me up again if you must."

"The rebels were handy with their whips, General. Your wounds are deep."

"And yet I remember it was my own soldiers who were whipping me when I came to. WHO did it is irrelevant. Just heal me!" The doctors muttered amongst themselves and Peeta huffed into his arm. One of the doctors prodded at the bruise on his ribs and he hissed.

"This looks nearly healed. Another rebel attack, I assume."

"Obviously the rebels and I are good friends," he said drily. "Let's just assume all of my injuries are from rebel attacks, shall we? It should save time. Then we don't have to go back and forth about who did what, and who exactly is responsible for which injuries on my body." The doctor cleared his throat and moved his hand over Peeta's shoulder.

"By all accounts, General, you should be unconscious from the pain. Your body has been through a great deal of trauma."  
"That's nothing new," Peeta said dismissively. "I don't have time for pain. I need the quickest treatment you Capitol doctors can give me. I have work to do and don't have time to lie around the hospital."

* * *

Several hours later, Peeta was sitting in the back of a luxurious black car as it zoomed through the Capitol to take him back to President Snow's house. The President had assured him that he would make sure Peeta would have the best medical treatment possible, and would be his personal guest until Peeta was feeling better. Thanks to the miracle treatments of the Capitol, Peeta was feeling much better and was ready to get back to work. He wanted to check on his wife and make sure she was comfortable moving back to their home before he returned to the fight. All he had heard since he had woken up was about the cursed Mockingjay and her rebel soldiers. He fully intended to deal with her, for what she had done.

The car parked and Peeta nodded to the driver as he hurried into the house. Less than a hour living here and he acted like he owned the place. He took the steps two at a time until he came to the bedroom. He heard quiet sniffling on the other side of the door and frowned at the door knob. He knocked once to announce his arrival before he pushed the door open. Lavinia was struggling to her feet and wiping her face with her sleeve.

"Are you alright?"

"Fine," she said dismissively. "Are you feeling better?"

"100%. I'm going to tell the President we can move back to our own home and then I am going to report to the troops." Lavinia's brow furrowed and Peeta lifted his chin.

"The Mockingjay has to be stopped. Her terror comes to an end soon." Lavinia swallowed heavily.

"She's a formidable force, Peter. Be careful."

"I need to speak to the Minister. Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm fine." She shook her head and he nodded, closing the door behind him. She visibly deflated, exhaling deeply and wrapping her arms around herself.

"What am I going to do?" She wandered into the bedroom and collapsed onto the bed, burying her face into the pillow. The Capitol had taken everything from her. Her husband, her home, her identity. Now she was going to have to watch as they destroyed two more lives, and what was worse, she had to play her part for her unborn child's sake. She allowed herself to cry, her hand moving down to cradle the bump.

 _"I know it seems hopeless now, but things always look bleak when it's raining and the sun isn't shining. It will be better tomorrow." She glared up at her husband._

 _"How do you know?"_

 _"Because we're together, love. I can bear the storm as long as I have you, and I'll be your shelter from the rain."_

 _"You are so sentimental, Darius. We're in District 12. All I care about is that you keep food on the table and help me provide for this little one when he or she comes." Darius placed his hand on her stomach and nuzzled her cheek._

 _"Love is so much more than just providing, Rosie. I'll make sure you have reason to smile and will make sure you are warm in the winter and will make sure your belly is full. I'll make sure you have no nightmares and the bed you sleep on is soft and that you are happy." She cocked her head, surveying him with interest._

 _"You are a strange one, Darius Murphy."_

 _"And yet somehow I was able to catch your eye. You see me as something more than a mere peacekeeper. You see a man."_

 _"You saved my life and my child's," she said softly. "Most people passed by me that night. Just another body in the streets. Just another knocked up woman. But you, you took me home and cared for me. You actually saw me. You endured my mood swings and my nightmares. You asked me to be yours."_

 _"And I'd do it all over again," he pressed his palm to her belly. "Rosalie, my wife, my love. I will gladly shield you from this storm." She shuddered as the lightning flashed outside._

 _"And what about after the storm passes? Will you still be here?" Darius's eyes bore into hers._

 _"Whether I am here in 12, or in another district, I will always be your shield." She covered his hand with hers and leaned into him._

 _"I hope this child is just like you."_

 _"It has to have a little of its mommy," he said but she shook her head vehemently._

 _"No. I don't want it to have anything from me. I'm not a good person, Darius. You don't know what I have done to survive. My ma died when I was 2, and my dad beat me whenever he was sober, and that was rare. You don't know anything about me."_

 _"I know you're beautiful," he whispered as he pushed a strand of hair behind her ear. "And sweet. And I saw you sneak a loaf of bread to those two children last week. I know you're good, Rosalie. You can't convince me otherwise."_

She blinked and glanced around the room.

"Now what do you think of me," she whispered to the empty room.

* * *

Peeta had no idea where he was going and why, in heavens name, was this house so big? The maid had told him to take two flights of stairs down and make a right down the hall, to find the Minister's office. That seemed like ages ago. He frowned as he pushed a door open, peering inside. Meeting space, he supposed.

"General Mellark." He sighed in relief as he gave his president a slight bow.

"President Snow, sir. I was just looking for Minister Antonius."

"Antonius has gone home. His wife was feeling ill. Are you feeling better, General?"

"Yes sir. 100%. I am ready to return to my troops."

"Excellent to hear. I have an assignment for you first. Two, if you accept."

"I accept whatever my president requires, sir." Snow once again commended himself on keeping Mellark as a soldier. He was too valuable to just kill. That fool Antonius would have killed him, to break the Mockingjay. He had much better ideas for the young peacekeeper.

"Here are the case files on the two assignments. Read them, then carry out your duties. I'll trust you to find out when would be an opportune time." Peeta flicked the files open and read, his brow furrowing.

"Sir, this man-"

"A traitor," the president said sternly. "I'll look to you to deal with our traitors."

"Yes sir."

"Good. Do you require anything else?"

"I need permission to move mine and Lavinia's things back home. We have enjoyed your hospitality too long, and I would hate to be a burden any longer."

"No trouble at all, Mellark. But I will have peacekeepers assist you in moving your things. I trust you to deal with those assignments first, however."

"Of course, Mr. President." Snow nodded and turned away, leaving Peeta to frown at the files in his hands.

* * *

The first assignment was being kept there in the mansion, so he decided to deal with this one first. He made a quick trip up to his room to dress in his uniform, and he strapped a gun to his waist. He left without a helmet, deciding he didn't care if the prisoner knew who he was or not. Snow thought the prisoner was valuable, so Peeta needed a different tactic than just torturing him. Peeta knew he could be very persuasive. He had been told he had a silver tongue, though he still had trouble remembering who or when it had been said. He hoped his memory would return soon. He didn't like to depend on anyone for help, and he hated the thought of having to ask Lavinia for anything. She barely met his eyes and he wasn't sure how they had come to be married. Perhaps it was an arranged marriage? Although come to think of it, he wasn't even sure where his family was.

His face screwed up in frustration as he ran his fingers through his hair.

"Damn it," he muttered. He really needed his memory to return.

He made his way to the cells and nodded to the peacekeeper standing guard.

"General Mellark, to speak to prisoner 4-DEJ. On orders from President Snow."

"Right this way, General." The soldier lead him down the hall and through the line of cells. Peeta raised a brow as he passed the prisoners being kept. He resisted the urge to ask the soldier what they were being held for. As he understood it, anyone considered a traitor to the Capitol would be taken prisoner.

The soldier stopped in front of a cell at the back and Peeta's eyes widened when he peered in. The man was in a bad way. His wrists were chained to the wall, his chin rested on his chest, his clothes were ragged and smelly. Peeta's nose wrinkled as the man's stench made its way to him.

"Unlock the cell."

"General-"

"Do I need to remind you I am acting on President Snow's orders? Unlock. The. Cell." The peacekeeper hurriedly shoved the key into the lock and allowed Peeta to enter. The man looked up and blinked several times, as if he couldn't believe his eyes.

"Peeta?"

"Peter. Are you Felix Duartyr?"

"Last time I checked. You look completely healed."

"Your rebel scum didn't defeat me."

"Rebel sc- Peeta, what are you talking about?" Peeta stood in front of his former general, his hands folded neatly behind his back. Duartyr sighed and lowered his head.

"They've done it again."

"Listen to me, old man. I know you know something about the rebellion. I'm willing to make you deal. Information for your life. It's a fine deal, I'd say."

"And what makes you think I know anything about that?"

"Our President says you are valuable. Which means you have some sort of information that he wants."

"So why don't you try to torture it out of me," the man spat. Peeta's eyes narrowed.

"I don't like torture. Too messy for me."

"You don't think you have beaten a kid from time to time? As your former general, I can tell you that this is false. You have done some terrible things, General Mellark."

"For the good of my country," Peeta replied calmly.

"Tell your President I don't know what he thinks I know, but if he wants to speak to me, he can come speak to me himself."

"You think the President will come down here," Peeta scoffed. "Preposterous."

"He came down here to visit you." Peeta's brow furrowed.

"To stop my own soldiers from killing me. They mistook me for a prisoner."

"Is that what he told you? Do you remember what happened to you before you were beaten by your soldiers?" Peeta hesitated and Duartyr shifted in his chains.

"You have been down here as long as I have, Peeta. They tortured you for weeks. They beat you and pumped tracker-jacker venom into your veins."

"Then tell me, old man, why are you chained to a wall while I am fully healed and ready to return to work?"

"Guess they think you are more valuable than I am. That you can accomplish something I can't do. Snow must think you have some kind of power over someone…" he trailed off, his eyes widening in horror.

"Oh hell," he muttered. Peeta straightened up and gripped his gun.

"Duartyr, I am going to give you some time to think about my offer. I'd be happy to get you some clean clothes and some food, if you just tell me what you know about the rebellion."

"Some water would be nice," Duartyr said in a croaky voice.

"Fetch Mr. Duartyr some water," Peeta snapped at the guard. The peacekeeper hurried away and returned with a cup and a long straw. Peeta waited while the prisoner drank, and raised a brow when he finished the entire cup and smacked his lips.

"Well?"

"My relief of dehydration has sharpened my wit and reminded me why I don't negotiate, General Mellark. If President Snow wants to speak to me, he needs to come to me directly. And I'd advise you to work on finding out who you are."

"Who I am," he repeated, distracted. "What the hell does that mean?"

"Where is your family, Mellark? Where did you grow up? What district are you from?"

"Why are you asking me all of these questions," Peeta scowled. Duartyr looked satisfied.

"Because the more you'll look for your past, the more you'll find things aren't as they seem."

"Get me out of here," Peeta barked at the peacekeeper. "This man is giving me a migraine." Duartyr smirked as the soldier lead Peeta out of the cell and slammed the door closed. Peeta followed the man back through the rows of cells and he jumped as he heard a young woman shriek.

"Mr. Mellark! Peeta, help me!" Frowning, he looked around for who the woman was referring to as she continued to reach out toward him. He edged closer so he could clearly make out the tears streaming down her cheeks.

"Do I know you?"

"Ellie Trinkett. I met you at the Boutique, with your wife."

"Sorry, I don't-"

"You must get me out of here! Please, I don't know anything! They think I know something about the rebellion because Cinna was one of them but I know nothing! I'm innocent!" Peeta shook his head and backed away from the cell.

"They're imprisoning me because I helped you and Katniss!" He ignored her pleas and followed the soldier until they were away from the cells and the screams of the prisoners.

* * *

Peeta glanced out the car window and wrinkled his nose.

"A peacekeeper lives here?"

"The Minister reports that this is his hideout, General Mellark. Are you sure you don't require back-up?"

"I'm fine," he replied, already stepping out of the car. He held his rifle in front of him and marched through the tall, unkempt grass. He was afraid to knock on the crumbling door, lest the whole place come down. His loud footsteps, however, had alerted whoever was inside. Peeta saw the curtains move, then heard the backdoor slam. He leaped over the decrepit porch and ran around the house. The peacekeeper was only a few feet away from him and he put on a sudden burst of speed that surprised even him. He tackled the old man and stood on his chest.

"Romulus Thread," he said sternly, glaring down at the traitor.

"Get off me, Mellark! What's gotten into your head?"

"You're under arrest, by orders of President Snow." The General thrashed beneath his feet.

"I'll have you flogged for this!" Peeta rolled his eyes and with no difficulty, bent down and cuffed Thread's hands. He pulled him to his feet and held his hands behind his back.

"Are you going to cooperate, Thread?"

"I should have killed you when I had the chance," Thread hissed. "Like your friend Murphy! You'll pay for this, mark me."

"None of your words make sense, Thread. Let's go."

"Oh ho," Thread dug his heels into the dirt. "They did it again, did they? They managed to make you forget again." Peeta frowned.

"What are you talking about?" But Thread was cackling and no matter how many times Peeta repeated his question, Thread refused to answer. Peeta's eyes flashed and he shoved Thread ahead of him.

"Walk," he snarled. When Thread was inches away from the car, there was a loud BANG that deafened the eerie silence. The soldier in the car gaped as the former Head Peacekeeper fell down dead. Peeta calmly walked past him and got back into the car.

"To President Snow's mansion," he said in an unshaken voice. The soldier's hands were white as he gripped the steering wheel the entire way back to the mansion.

* * *

Snow looked impressed as Peeta stood before him in a salute.

"The assignments have been taken care of?"

"The second one has, sir. The first will call for persuasion and we must be careful. I have a feeling he will cave soon. But we have to be delicate and give it some time. I'm confident, sir, that I will be able to squash this rebellion."

"Excellent to hear. Be on your way, Mellark. I have a dinner to attend with my family tonight. Your belongings have been moved to your home and your wife is there waiting for you."

"Thank you, President Snow." Peeta bowed low and returned to the car, where he told the soldier he would like to be driven home. The soldier looked baffled for a moment, then turned in his seat.

"What is your address, sir?" Peeta faltered and stared out the window.

"Damn rebels," he muttered. "Causing me all sorts of memory problems. Let me get the address from President Snow."

Less than an hour later, Peeta was inside his luxurious home and watching his wife sleep in their bed. For some reason, he didn't want to lie next to her. Deciding he might read for a bit, he went to the living room and perused the book shelves. None of these titles were familiar to him. He made a face as he grabbed one, flipped it open, and plopped down on the couch. Minutes later, he was asleep with the book open on his chest. Unbeknownst to him, his wife rose from her nap, watched him sleep for a moment with a sad look on her face, and finally covered him with a blanket. Then she returned to the bedroom, where she clutched a pillow to her face and cried herself to sleep.

 _Present day…_

Peeta crouched low, his eyes trained on the sky.

"Sir-" But Peeta held his fist up and the soldier fell silent.

"Mellark," came a voice in Peeta's ear. Peeta sighed and pressed a button.

"Mellark here."

"What the hell are you doing? The rebels will get away!"

"We have all eyes on the sky at the moment, sir. They haven't taken off, so they have no way of escaping by sky. They are still on the roof."

"Then why isn't someone on the roof killing them at this moment?"

"The same reason I didn't fire, Minister. We don't know enough about the situation at this time and it's too much of a risk."

"To hell with the risk! I don't want those rebels to get away."

"They won't, sir. We will make sure of that." Peeta pressed the button, ending the connection. He knew the Minister would be furious but he knew the rebels would try to find alternative means of escape and he needed to focus.

"I want two teams on the ground, guarding entrances to the city. Make sure they don't escape. I also want two teams to go underground."

"Underground General?"

"The rebels are smart. To ignore that would make us fools. Are you a fool, soldier?"

"No sir," the young peacekeeper stammered.

"I thought not. We cut off their escape routes, whatever means necessary, and force them to surrender. I want ten of you to follow me up to the roof. Let's go."

* * *

Gale scowled as he paced back and forth, while Finnick wrapped a bandage around Rory's injured hand. Rye stared off in the distance, looking pale and Boggs sighed heavily.

"Hovercraft is unable to land, that much is evident. We need to find another way out of the Capitol."

"We shouldn't have assumed he would willingly come with us," Gale snarled. "This was a fool mission."

"Shut up, Gale," Rye snapped. "You have never liked my brother. I don't even know why you volunteered for this mission."

"I did it for Katniss," Gale said angrily. "Not for your brother. And I'm not surprised that he is on their side now. Haymitch warned us that they might have used more tracker-jacker venom on him. He's become a liability and President Coin won't like that."

"That's enough, Soldier Hawthorne," Boggs said sternly. "I decide when someone becomes a liability."

"You can't seriously be considering that we can still take him with us?!"

"The mission was to rescue Soldier Mellark from the Capitol and return him to District 13. Our mission hasn't been fulfilled. We needed to get him away from the Minister of Defense."

"What, so he could rejoin his troops and plan a way to kill us?"

"I said, that's enough," Boggs said coldly. Gale threw his hands into the air but fell silent. Rye adjusted his rifle on his shoulder.

"Katniss will lose it if we come back without him."

"Unfortunately Soldier Mellark, I don't see any other option at this time. She did remind me that I was the one who left him behind in the first place, so of course I would like to reunite husband and wife but I won't do so if it is a danger to her."

"You think Peeta would hurt Katniss," Finnick asked softly.

"I'm betting that's what Snow is counting on. He might have even wanted us to capture him, so we could deliver him to her. My thought is that they poisoned him again and fed him lies. I can't say for certain since we don't know enough right now but that seems like a good way to get rid of Katniss."

"And Peeta as well," Rory muttered. "Make him kill her and then he would be killed for doing it."

"Exactly. Kill two birds with one stone, as it were. So we're not going to take him back to 13 until we know for sure he hasn't completely forgotten her."

"You heard him," Gale cried. "He asked us who Katniss was! He said something about his wife being upstairs! He's forgotten her and accepted whatever lies the Capitol is feeding him. Isn't this the third or fourth time they've been able to do that?"

"I'm about to throw you off this roof and hope Peeta is down there to finish your sorry ass off," Rye said through gritted teeth.

"Pretty sure I can take your pretty boy brother."

"Pretty sure you can't," Boggs said coldly. "Not with all the poison in his blood. Haymitch says depending on the amount, he's most likely at least three times as strong and three times as powerful. Which means we can't overcome him. I want to talk to him. Without his troops."

"You think he'd go for that?"

"Raise the white flag. Call down to them that we want to talk to their General. Then we will see if Peeta is truly lost to us." Gale scowled as Finnick leaned over the roof and waved a white bandage in the air.


	55. Chapter 55

Rosalie's hands shook as she lifted the teacup to her lips. The President's wife and daughter had invited her to tea, and she was scared stiff. She listened to the teenage girl gossip for hours and resisted from rolling her eyes. How could a young girl be so ignorant? In her district, girls Aurelia's age had already known deep fear five times, having their names in a Reaping bowl, and definitely knew starvation, despite if they were Merchant or Seam. Aurelia chattered happily about her clothes and her collection of pretty glass ornaments that Lavinia simply MUST see, and Rosalie shifted in her seat. This is who you are now, she told herself firmly.

You are a Capitol-bred woman. You don't know hunger. You don't know fear. You know only luxury and privilege, and your husband is a prominent Capitol citizen.

She set her teacup down and reached for a danish.

She had only tasted a danish once in her life. It had come from Mellark's Bakery and she was eight years old.

An entire tray of freshly-made danishes sat in front of her, taunting her. Her hand fell back to her lap.

"Oh have one, Lavinia," Mrs. Snow pushed the tray toward her. "You want to see a plump and healthy baby!"

"It's so exciting," Aurelia squealed. "General Mellark is soooooo handsome."

"He is, isn't he," Rosalie tried to giggle but it sounded more like a squeak.

"Tell us how you met! The last time he was here, wasn't he with-"

"Aurelia, don't be rude," Mrs. Snow scolded. She patted Rosalie's hand and shook her head. "Teenagers. Obsessed with love and yet they know nothing, isn't that right?" Aurelia's mother cupped her daughter's chin. "They grow up so fast though." Rosalie stared at her plate. Everyone in her district grew up much too fast. They had to. She had been on her own since she was 14. Her mother had died when she was a baby, and she had run away from her abusive father. She had been forced to go to the Head Peacekeeper, Cray, when she was just a child. She had become one of his favorites. He kept her clothed and fed and she warmed his bed at night, until another young woman would come along. He always took her in whenever she came by, though. And then she thought she had fallen in love. He had been good to her and promised to take care of her. His fists were as sharp as her father's had been, and when she found out she was expecting a child, she'd been terrified. He had beat her and left her for dead. The man who had found her had turned out to be the love of her life, and now he had left her too.

Rosalie was nothing more than an empty shell but an empty shell that was carrying life. She unconsciously rubbed her belly and Aurelia's eyes lit up.

"Can I feel the baby kick?"

"Um… Sure." She felt uncomfortable when the girl pressed her palm to her stomach. She hated this girl. These two women who had everything she'd ever wanted. Who were partly responsible for her husband's death. She jumped to her feet and Aurelia blinked up in surprise.

"I'm sorry. Where is your bathroom?"

"Down the hall, second on the left. Julius will show you," Mrs. Snow nodded toward the servant hiding in the corner. He stepped forward and gestured for Rosalie to follow him.

"Thank you," she said as he stopped in front of the door. He bowed low and swallowed thickly. Rosalie's eyes filled with tears as she realized the man was an Avox. Her husband had been turned into an Avox before they had come to the Capitol. She couldn't imagine anyone hurting Darius, he was always so good and kind. Yet someone had, and then they had killed him when they came here. She hated this place. She hated these people. Tears streamed down her cheeks as she pushed the door open and she fell to her knees in front of the toilet.

* * *

"They're surrendering," the soldier to Peeta's left muttered. "Why are they surrendering?"

"A trick," another snarled. "Rebel scum! Let's just bomb the roof."

"This is President Snow's house," Peeta said, rolling his eyes. What an idiot. "What is the soldier saying?" He stood and moved closer to the house. One of the soldiers cupped his hands and was yelling something.

"We would like to speak with you, General. Alone."

"I don't think so, Soldier," he called back. "Do you surrender?"

"We just want to talk!"

"Do. You. Surrender?"

"No! And we can easily shoot your troops from here. Yet we haven't. Why do you think that is?" Peeta paused. The rebel soldier was right. The rebels were at an advantage, being above them. They could fire easily and yet Peeta would have to get a hovercraft in the air to fire on them. He stroked his chin.

"Fine. Who is the leader of your troop?"

"I am, General," the dark man called down. "Colonel Boggs."

"Colonel Boggs," Peeta nodded. "You may have 2 soldiers with you, as will I."

"I asked to speak to you alone."

"I'm no fool, Colonel. You're taller and bigger than I am. Two soldiers. I don't negotiate." Boggs scowled and turned back to his team. Rye nodded and Gale's eyes narrowed.

"Fine. Two soldiers. Is there a place we can talk privately?"

"Follow the stairs down to the third floor hallway. There is a room we can use." Boggs nodded.

"Five minutes." Peeta jerked his head and he and two soldiers disappeared into the house.

"Soldiers Mellark and Odair, you come with me. Soldiers Hawthorne and Hawthorne, try to communicate with 13. Tell them we are trapped and see if Plutarch Heavensbee has any recommendations on how to get out." Gale nodded and started twisting knobs on his transmitter.

"Ryen, can you think of anything that will snap him out of this?" Rye miserably shook his head.

"If Katniss's name didn't jolt him, I don't know what will."

"What about her voice," Finnick suggested. "What if we try to contact 13 and let her speak to him?" Boggs's brow was furrowed in thought.

"It's worth a shot. On second thought, you both stay here and try to get through. Haymitch should have a separate channel, and he has direct access to Katniss. I'll talk to Peeta alone."

"Colonel… are you certain?"

"You're a good soldier, Mellark. But I can't have this mission compromised by family ties. Stay here by the door and I will yell if I need you." Rye looked doubtful but he nodded in understanding.

"Yes sir." Boggs shouldered his rifle and re-entered the house. Rye clicked on his transmitter.

"Mockingjay One, do you copy?"

"Make it quick, Ryen," was the reply.

"Haymitch, we need to get Katniss on a broadcast. Right now."

* * *

Boggs followed Peeta's instructions and saw the three soldiers standing in front of the door. Peeta frowned.

"Where is your back-up?"

"I told you, I just want to talk. I don't need back-up. They stayed on the roof." Peeta pushed the door open and jerked his head.

"You stay here," he told his soldiers.

"But General-"

"That's an order," he barked before slamming the door closed. Peeta turned to face the Colonel and his hands went behind his back.

"You asked for this meeting, Colonel Boggs. So talk."

"So is it Peeta or Peter?"

"It's General Mellark, Colonel."

"I see. Well, I'm Colonel Easton Boggs. It's a pleasure to meet you. I have heard much about you." Peeta lifted his chin.

"General Peter Mellark of District 2. Can I assume you are from District 13?"

"You know about 13?" Boggs sounded surprised. He wasn't sure what Snow had told him.

"Of course we know. You thought you would stay hidden forever? Your leader, Madame Coin, thinks she can win the war with her special weapon."

"And what special weapon would that be?"

"The Mockingjay." Boggs paled.

"So you know about our secret weapon."

"We do. And one woman is not going to win you a war, Colonel."

"Boggs, come in. Boggs." The Colonel scowled and turned to the side.

"What," he hissed.

"Sir, we have a problem. Katniss isn't in 13." Boggs frowned and turned his back to Peeta.

"What?"

"Haymitch says they are on their way to District 8 to shoot a propo."

"District 8? Why are they sending her to 8?"

"They didn't send her, Colonel, she asked to go."

"I'm waiting, Colonel," Peeta said, sounding bored.

"Get her on a broadcast," Boggs hissed into his transmitter. "My apologies, General. Where were we?"

"I believe you were about to tell me what is so special about this… Mockingjay."

"You should know, General." Peeta's eyes flashed.

"And what is that supposed to mean?"

"Have you heard the name 'Katniss' before, General Mellark?" He could tell Peeta was taken aback.

"No."

"Are you sure about that?"

"Are you questioning my memory?"

"Well I was about to ask about that next. Do you remember your parents? Your brothers?"

"I'm an only child," he said dismissively. "And my parents are dead."

"They're not. They are alive and well, and in District 13."

"Why would they be-"

"Because their home, District 12, was bombed by the Capitol." Peeta's eyes narrowed.

"Yes General. Your home was District 12 too."

"You speak as if you know me. And that is impossible, despite what you may have heard. Did you really ask to speak to me in private to question me about my personal life?"

"Doesn't it seem suspicious, General, that President Snow had to tell you who you were when you woke up? Who you were married to? Where you were from? Did you even remember where your house was?"

"Your Mockingjay attacked me and left me for dead," Peeta snarled. "I can't remember much because of the trauma to my head. So I actually have you to thank for all of this."

"I'd love to take the credit but Katniss was with me in District 13, so she can't have been responsible for your trauma. She has been...out of sorts for some time now. Which means it was Capitol soldiers who attacked you. Poisoned you too. Tell me, what is your wife's name?"

"Not that it's any of your business but her name is Lavinia."

"Boggs, we have Katniss connected." Boggs held the transmitter out towards Peeta.

"There is someone who would like to speak with you."

"What kind of trick is this?"

"No trick, General. Katniss, he's here."

"Peeta?" Peeta's eyes flew to the transmitter. "Peeta, are you there?"

"You can speak to her, General." Peeta took a step backwards and shook his head. Boggs grunted in frustration.

"Katniss, say something!"

"Can he hear me?"

"He can hear you!" Peeta stared at the transmitter as if it was a snake.

"Are you, are you, coming to the tree, where I told you to run, so we'd both be free," the reception wasn't great but Boggs could tell her voice was doing something to Peeta. "Strange things did happen here, no stranger would it be. If we met at midnight in the hanging tree. Are you, are you, coming to the tree, where a dead man called out, for his love to flee." Most people would have questioned why Katniss was singing such a morbid song but he could see the changes in the young peacekeeper. Peeta inhaled sharply and his eyes seemed to glaze over.

"It's working. Keep going, Katniss."

"Strange things did happen here, no stranger would it be, if we met at midnight in the hanging tree. Are you, are you, coming to the tree, wear a necklace of rope, side by side with me, strange things did happen here, no stranger would it be, if we met at midnight in the hanging tree." Boggs walked toward Peeta, holding the transmitter out and Peeta continued to back up until he was flat against the door. He shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair.

"Who is that?"

"That's your wife. Katniss."

"Peeta," Katniss's voice was gentle. "Remember what I said. Remember, they can't take you from me again. Remember my voice, pulling you back together and back to me. Remember." Peeta blinked and reached a shaky hand toward the transmitter.

"Come home to me, Peeta. Come home."

"Home," Peeta repeated softly.

"Haymitch! What is that?" Peeta and Boggs both blinked at the transmitter in confusion. There was a scream and a loud bang.

"They're shooting at us," they heard her cry. Katniss's voice disappeared and Haymitch's returned.

"Haymitch, give me a status update."

"-shooting at us. We can't land. Kat-s get away- window-." The static continued until it disconnected the broadcast. Boggs shook the transmitter angrily.

"Haymitch! Katniss! Can anyone hear me?" The transmitter went dead and Boggs punched the wall. "Dammit!" He turned back to Peeta, who was blinking in confusion.

"Do you remember anything now, Peeta?" The general straightened up and lifted his chin.

"Peter. And I don't know what you are trying to accomplish here, Colonel, but it won't work. I won't fall for your rebel tricks."

"Then I have no choice but to leave you behind," Boggs said sadly. Before Peeta could speak or move, Boggs's leg swung out and knocked Peeta to the ground. The Colonel punched the guards standing outside the door, then took off up the stairs. He slammed the door behind him and the men gaped at him.

"Please tell me Plutarch has a plan."

"He does, sir. Hovercraft estimated to land in ten seconds." Rory was right; the hovercraft sailed in and a rope ladder dropped while it hovered several feet off the ground. The soldiers fired from the ground but the pilot had them in the air and out of the city in no time. Peeta glared at the retreating hovercraft from the window, his neatly styled hair blowing in the wind. It was comforting, in a way. It felt like the loving caress of someone familiar. A mother, perhaps? No, he knew that couldn't be right. He didn't remember much about his mother but he didn't imagine her for loving caresses. And he couldn't really connect it with Lavinia. His time with her since he had woken up was awkward and quiet. She preferred to be alone, and he heard her crying every night. He straightened up and closed the window, his mind returning to the voice he had heard on the transmitter. For some strange reason, his heart was still racing. Frowning, he marched past his soldiers, ignoring their questions. He made his way downstairs, to the cells. He nodded to the peacekeeper in charge, who bowed his head and lead Peeta to the back.

The man looked up and managed a weak smile.

"Back again, General Mellark?"

"What name do you keep calling me?" Duartyr's brow furrowed. "Each time I come to you, you call me by another name. What is it?"

"Peeta," he said gently.

"That sounds like a type of bread. Why is everyone calling me that?"

"You didn't like my answers yesterday, General. Why do you continue to ask?"

"Because I'm still trying to sort things out. It's been two and a half weeks, Duartyr. Why can't I remember anything? Why is everything still so… fuzzy?"

"You were poisoned, and I don't know how much damage it's done. You may never fully remember your old life." Peeta looked troubled and Duartyr cocked his head.

"Something's happened. You look quite anxious."

"I heard… a girl's voice."

"A girl?" He nodded. "You mean your wife?"

"No, not Lavinia. She was upstairs having tea with the President's wife and daughter. Someone else. She… she sang to me." Comprehension crossed over Duartyr's face.

"What did you feel when you heard it?"

"I can't explain it. My heart, it… it's racing."

"Like it should when you're around Lavinia?" Peeta glanced up at the prisoner and bit his lip.

"Do you remember when you married her?"

"No. It's all so fuzzy. I can't remember meeting her, or when we married."

"Perhaps you should ask her about it."

"I've tried! She looks terrified and falls silent every time. I tried to feel the baby kick yesterday and she shied away from me. I don't even know if the child is mine! I don't remember anything about my parents or my school or my wedding day… those are things one should never forget!"

"You're right," Duartyr said, nodding in sympathy. Peeta huffed and ran his hands through his hair.

"Duartyr, you've been calling me Peeta. You mentioned a girl named Katniss. Why don't I know these names?"

"I'm a traitor to the Capitol, Mellark. Why would you trust me?" Peeta frowned. It was a fair question and one he had been asking himself for a week. He had been coming to see the prisoner every day, trying to gain information about the rebellion. But he found he actually liked the former general. He was stubborn but clever. He had wit and a certain charm. And he told him things about his own past that he started to question. He told Peeta that he liked to draw and that he had a brother who was also a peacekeeper.

"I don't know," Peeta finally answered. "Just tell me."

"You're the son of a baker," Duartyr said gently. "The youngest. They named you Peeta. You fell in love when you were five years old. When you heard her sing, you told me. Katniss was her name."

"That's impossible," Peeta whispered. "How can I not… why don't I remember?"

"Peeta, the Capitol has been injecting you with tracker-jacker venom for over a month now. Highjacking, it's called. They want to turn you against her. To kill her."

"The Mockingjay," Peeta whispered in horror.

"It's a name that the rebellion gave to her father, before he died. Now she is taking his place. Her voice will awaken Panem and stir them into action. Her real name, however, is Katniss Everdeen Mellark." Peeta turned away, covering his face with his hands.

"I can't remember what she looks like. She sounded so familiar but I can't remember what she looks like!" He saw a pair of silver eyes flash in the front of his mind.

"Dark hair," Duartyr said. "And smaller stature, not very big. And lovely grey eyes."

"Silver," Peeta whispered. "Shining pools of starlight."

"Yes," Duartyr said in approval. "You love her. Your wife, your real wife, is waiting for you." He opened his mouth to respond but heard his name being called.

"General Mellark!"

"Yes, I'll be right there!" He turned back to Duartyr and nodded. "I'll be right back. I have more questions."

"I'll be here," Duartyr nodded. Peeta shouldered his gun and hurried out of the cell. He moved so quickly, he didn't see Minister Antonius move into Duartyr's cell, a shining blade by his side.

* * *

 _ **I'm leaving for vacation and wanted to post beforehand! Enjoy, and I'll see yall when I get back! XOXOXO**_


	56. Chapter 56

Peeta skidded to a halt at the front of the cells, frowning at his peacekeeper.

"What is it, soldier?"

"Um… never mind, General. Everything's ok now." Peeta's brow furrowed further.

"Did something happen?"

"Uh… no sir. I mean, yes sir. But, uh, we're ok now." Peeta crossed his arms.

"The truth, Soldier. NOW."

"Minister Antonius ordered for me to distract you, General."

"Distract me? Why would he-" Peeta's eyes widened in realization and he turned on his heel and ran. He nearly crashed into the wall but he grabbed hold of the cell bars to keep himself up right when he saw Duartyr lying a puddle of blood, the Minister standing above him with a knife. Peeta gripped the bars with white knuckles.

"Minister," he said weakly. "I saw no notices of execution for today."

"This was necessary, General. He was feeding you lies. I couldn't let his deception continue."

"Peeta," Duartyr let out in a choking gasp. "Remember." Peeta winced as Antonius kicked Duartyr in the head and the former general lay still. Antonius leaned down and wiped his bloody knife on the man's ragged shirt.

"President Snow needed information from him," Peeta said through gritted teeth.

"President Snow will thank me for killing him. Look at what he's done to you, Peter! You're confused and questioning everything. Lavinia tells me you ask about your family and where the two of you met. She's devastated that you're not letting her help you."

"I have asked her to help me! She just gets really sad for some reason and I don't want to make it worse."

"The guards have told me of the lies this man has been telling you. Would you believe a traitor to the Capitol? A man who has been disloyal to his president?"

"Some things he said… made sense. Why hasn't anyone here answered my questions? Why was he the only one?"

"Very well, Peter. Ask your questions and I'll do my best to answer them. Guards!" The peacekeepers appeared and Antonius waved a hand in disgust.

"Dispose of this. Come upstairs with me, Peter. I'll try to wipe away any doubts you may have." Peeta cast one last glance at Duartyr as the peacekeepers dragged him out of the cell.

* * *

Peeta frowned as they stood in front of President Snow's office.

"Why are we here?"

"President Snow can help answer your questions. After all, the prisoner has lied about him too, right?" Not waiting for an answer, he knocked and pushed the door open. The secretary nodded and Antonius pushed Peeta through the next door.

"President Snow, sir," they both bowed. Snow scowled as he extinguished his cigarette.

"What's happened, Antonius?"

"Our young friend here has some questions. I thought you might help me answer them for him." Snow continued to scowl but gestured toward the chairs.

"What seems to be the problem, Peter?" Peeta glanced sideways at Antonius.

"It's been two and a half weeks since I woke up with head trauma, sir, and I still can't remember anything. I know the doctors said it will come back but isn't it strange that I have forgotten everything? My parents, my home, my wedding day… none of it is there. I find this odd, President Snow. And I have heard some things that make me wonder."

"Peter has been listening to the prisoner Duartyr," Antonius said quietly. "He's been feeding him lies about who he really is. He said the Mockingjay is actually good." Snow grunted and leaned over to punch a button.

"I just received this from intel. You tell me if she's good or not." Peeta leaned in to inspect the picture on the screen. It was a young woman, he could tell, but her eyes were angry and full of hatred. Her features were twisted as she pointed at the burning building behind her.

"What happened?"

"She just bombed a hospital in District 8." Peeta's head jerked up. Snow nodded and gave a heavy sigh.

"Men, women, and children. Hundreds of them, dead. Look at her, Peter. Does that look like someone who does good things?"

"But why would she do something like that?"

"She is a rebel. She believes we are the enemy. She is trying to blame the country's misfortunes on the Capitol, and in doing so, turn our people against us. District 8 did not agree with the rebels, so they attacked. Her father did the same thing, until we got rid of him. We must do the same with her." Peeta stared at the woman's face, trying to find her in his memory.

"Where are my parents?"

"You were an orphan when you became a soldier. Only 15 and so eager to serve your country. Your superiors called you a fine soldier." His eyes did not leave the screen.

"And Lavinia? When did we marry?"

"Only last year. You were betrothed when you were both young. Arranged by your parents and by hers. You agreed to marry her in your parents' memory. She was in love with someone else but understood her duty. I imagine that is why you do not feel the most tender feelings coming from her."

"Is it true that you have been poisoning me?"

"Of course not, Peter. We are trying to help you. I told the doctors to give you the best treatments available, so you may regain your memory."

"Why do they call her the Mockingjay?"

"The mockingjay was a mistake. A creature that was never supposed to exist. It has become a symbol of revolution, and the rebels chose the symbol to slight us, as the creature was our accidental creation in the first place. She is a living symbol of defiance." Peeta's eyes remained locked on the image of her face.

"Help us, Peter. Help us rid Panem of her." Peeta finally nodded and stood.

"I'll summon the troops. We will launch an attack on 13. She won't get away with this."

"Do you have any more questions for us?" Peeta glanced at Antonius before turning back to Snow.

"No sir. You both have been very kind to me, since I was brought here. Your family has been wonderful to Lavinia. I am sorry I doubted you."

"Your distrust is expected, given what you have been through. Nevertheless, let us put aside those feelings and concentrate on winning this war."

"Yes sir." Peeta bowed to both of them and swiftly left the office. He nearly ran straight into Aurelia Snow.

"Forgive me, Miss Snow, I'm terribly clumsy."

"No harm, General Mellark," the girl giggled. "I was actually coming down here to find you."

"Me?"

"Your wife needs you."

"What's happened," he asked in a panic.

"She has just been in the bathroom for a long time and when I went to check on her, she was crying. I decided to come and fetch you. I'm certain you can comfort her."

I'm certain I can't, he thought to himself. All Lavinia did was cry and he was never able to say or do the right thing. He didn't even understand why she was so upset in the first place, and she certainly wouldn't tell him.

But he nodded and gave her a little bow.

"Thank you, Miss Snow. I'll check and make sure she is alright."

"General," Aurelia's hand on his made him freeze. "I must ask you. What happened to the other woman?" Peeta's face screwed up in confusion.

"I beg your pardon?"

"It's just… you refused to sleep with me on my birthday because you said you were in love with one woman. That you were a virgin, waiting for her. But then you return to the Capitol with someone else. Did you not find me pleasing to look at?" Peeta felt a chill as all his breath seemed to leave him.

"Miss Snow, I… I find you to be beautiful and too precious for a mere peacekeeper to even look at. I assure you I did not mean to offend you."

"Then where is she? Katniss, I think her name was." All of the color left his face. Someone cleared their throat behind them and both of them whirled around.

"Aurelia, dear, please come into my office for a moment."

"I'll go and find Lavinia. Thank you for bringing my wife's distress to my attention, Miss Snow." Peeta bowed and hurried off. Aurelia flounced into her father's office, unaware of his rage. The Minister trembled in his seat.

"Aurelia, what did I say about repeating THAT name ever again?"

"I just wanted to know what happened to her, Daddy. He seemed to be so in love with her, and-"

"This does not concern you," Snow growled, towering over his daughter. "And you will never speak to General Mellark again, do you understand?"

"Daddy!"

"Go to your room, Aurelia, and stay there."

"I'm not as dumb as you think I am, Daddy," she crossed her arms and pouted. "I know you two did something to him after Grandfather died. You didn't think Mother and I would question why you want us to be nice to this woman that you're telling him is his wife?"

"Your mother knows her place. It is time you learned yours."

"I think you're right," her eyes darted to the screen and her brow furrowed. "Goodnight Daddy." Snow fumed as his daughter closed the door behind her and slammed his fist on the desk.

"At least the picture seemed to convince him," Antonius said halfheartedly.

"Let's hear what the brat has to say," Snow punched a button and the picture moved.

"I want to tell the rebels that I am alive. That I'm right here in District Eight, where the Capitol has just bombed a hospital full of unarmed men, women and children. There will be no survivors."

"You have some explaining to do," Snow snarled at Antonius.

"Sir, our troops saw a clear shot to bring the Mockingjay's hovercraft down so they took it."

"On your orders."

"But sir-"

"Shut up, Antonius."

"I want to tell people that if you think for one second the Capitol will treat us fairly, you're deluding yourself. Because you know who they are and what they do. This is what they do and we must fight back! President Snow says he's sending a message. Well I have one for him. You can torture us and bomb and burn our districts to the ground, but do you see that?" The camera drifted up to a Capitol plane, burning on the roof of a warehouse. "Fire is catching! And if we burn, you burn with us!"

"Little bitch," the President punched the button to stop the video.

"Let's be glad he didn't ask to see the video." Snow snapped a pencil in his grip.

"You ordered for them to bomb the hospital?"

"I ordered for them to fire on the hovercraft. It landed and they escaped into the hospital, so we targeted it. The bitch fired on us first."

"She brought down Capitol planes? With what?"

"Her arrows. She's gifted with the bow. A rival to the goddess Diana, they say."

"Then I can't wait to fire one into her husband's heart right in front of her."

"There is something else, President Snow." Snow was rubbing his temples and shaking his head.

"I had to kill Duartyr." Snow's hands dropped to the desk.

"You what?"

"I had to, sir. He was telling Mellark everything. About her, about their life together, about his time in 2. He even told him we poisoned him. We need to keep a close eye on him."

"You killed the one person who had information about the rebellion?"

"He isn't the only one, sir. There are others. Victors who joined the rebel army."

"But we can't get to them because they're under the protection of District 13," Snow said slowly as if he were talking to a child. "Just as the Mockingjay is. How do you propose we torture the information out of someone we can't get to?"

"Then we send him to 13. Let him go after her himself."

"And if she kills him first?"

"Then we won't have to do it ourselves," Antonius shrugged. "There are rebel camps along the way, I'm told. Order him to ransack them and kill the refugees. Turn him into a monster before he gets back to her. That way, if he does find his way back, she won't even want him anymore." Snow looked considering.

"Give him the orders. And get my wife down here. I need to speak with her about Aurelia." Antonius scrambled from the office as quickly as he could.

* * *

Peeta leaned against the wall outside the bathroom, listening to Lavinia's whimpers. He closed his eyes and shook his head. Aurelia Snow was yet another person to bring up that strangely familiar name. Katniss. He mouthed the word, his lips feeling numb. And why would Aurelia lie? If anything, as the daughter of the president, she would back up whatever her father said. Yet she had said Peeta had loved this girl. He ran his hands through his hair and his head hit the wall behind him with a loud thud. Wincing, he rubbed the back of his head and sighed. He wished his memory would return. He just wanted things to make sense again.

"It's our wedding night, Peeta. Don't you want me?" His eyes snapped open and he looked around.

"Hello?"

"Do you want me," the voice repeated softly.

"I want to know who you are," he moaned. "Tell me. Please."

"I'm yours." His palms pressed to his temples and he groaned in frustration. The bathroom door opened and he spun around. Lavinia gasped in surprise.

"Peter, what are you doing here?"

"Miss Snow said you weren't well. I wanted to check on you."

"I'm fine. Just morning sickness."

"Why don't I escort you home?" She nodded and accepted his arm. Mrs. Snow came rushing out of the nearest room and froze in her steps.

"Mrs. Mellark, are you feeling better?"

"I am, Mrs. Snow, thank you. My husband is escorting me home."

"Thank you for taking such good care of her, Mrs. Snow," Peeta bowed to the President's wife.

"It was delightful to see you again, Lavinia. I will send you an invitation for another very soon."

"That would be… delightful," Lavinia said with a weak smile. Cassandra Snow watched them walk arm in arm down the stairs, then followed leaving some distance between them. She folded her hands and made her way to her husband's study.

"How is he, Egeria?"

"I haven't heard anything, Mrs. Snow," the secretary nodded toward the door. Cassandra pushed the door open and peered inside. Her husband was standing in front of the glass, a drink in one hand and a cigar in the other.

"You're troubled."

"Your daughter nearly destroyed everything we have worked for."

"Don't be so dramatic," she rolled her eyes.

"She is not to speak to Mellark again, Cassandra, do you hear me?"

"Good luck with that," she snorted in reply. Snow's eyes narrowed.

"Do you think this is a game we are playing here? Do you want a sixteen year old sitting in this office? For the board to arrest her because she doesn't know how to rule a country?"

"Caius, do us both a favor and stop pretending you did any of this for your daughter. Your father was weak, I will grant you that, but you didn't have to kill him."

"You would rather rebels take hold of the country? Because that's what would have happened if he had remained in power."

"And yet it looks like that's a possibility even after your father's death," she nodded toward the screen, where Katniss's face was frozen, anger etched in every line.

"Bitch," he growled under his breath. "I need to get rid of her."

"So brainwashing the peacekeeper didn't work," she sounded mildly bored as she checked her reflection in the mirror. "Did you think he would actually kill her?"

"We haven't tested him at his full strength. Antonius thinks we should order him to attack the refugee camps on his way to 13. We can send him to kill her."

"Antonius thinks," she scoffed. "That idiot is the whole reason we are in this mess! If he hadn't ordered Thread to arrest the girl in the first place, you could have continued the poison. Kept your father frail and unable to rule, rather than kill him altogether. What happens when the Minister decides to blab about all of your transgressions?"

"He knows I will bring him down with me if that happens."

"I don't know, Caius, seems to be that you could save yourself some trouble if you just go ahead and get rid of him. That brings the witness list down to one. Or eliminate it altogether."

"You think I am wasting my time," he said cooly.

"I think you are taking a huge risk and wasting a lot of resources. How many people have you had to pay off for their silence? You should have kept that poor woman's husband alive, to motivate her further."

"I'm not worried about her. I would have kept him alive but Antonius gave those orders, not me. Still, I don't think she will be a problem. She wants to keep her child safe. She will stick to the story."

"And I understand Antonius killed another one today? His hands are getting quite bloody, Caius. Are you going to just let him continue?" Caius growled as he sipped at his drink.

"I won't kill Mellark. He could be valuable. He could be the key to bringing down that girl."

"Your father underestimated the Mockingjay once, Caius. Don't you make that same mistake."

"Just make sure Aurelia stays away from Mellark, alright? I'll ship him out as soon as I'm able."

"Fine," she sighed. "And what of his little wife? Can I look forward to more awkward tea parties in the future?"

"Did she say anything of importance?"

"She knows what's at stake, Caius. She may be from 12 but she's not a fool."

"Seems like they all are."

"You have always had such a bias against District 12. They're just poor, Caius, they aren't mutts."

"They're not like us, Cassandra." She pursed her lips and shrugged.

"Do what you will. I know you're going to anyway. And if you have Antonius killed, make sure you find the papers that your father gave him."

"What papers?" Cassandra rolled her eyes.

"The papers stating that Aurelia is next in line, not you. Honestly, Caius. Use your brain for once."

"What makes you think there is a paper trail? He told Antonius in confidence until he could make it official."

"Is that what Antonius told you? Very well, dear husband, believe your traitorous Minister of Defense rather than your clever wife. You will not, however, lay a hand on Aurelia. She is innocent."

"You think I would murder my own daughter?"

"Why not? You murdered your own father," she gave him a smirk before she flounced out of the office.


	57. Chapter 57

Katniss's shoulders slumped as she walked back to the hovercraft. The entire district smelled like death but her team was cheering. Why? Because they had managed to shoot down a few Capitol hovercrafts? Only after they'd destroyed the hospital full of innocent people. Innocent people who were now dead. Innocent people who had, only moments ago, put their fingers to their lips, then raised their hands into the air, to symbolize their loyalty to Katniss and all she stood for. She had been uncomfortable with the whole thing but the film makers Plutarch had introduced her to had told her it would help for people to see her with them. Just let them see your face, the director had told her.

And now they were dead. Because they had seen her face. Because she had been in the building with them. The Capitol hovercrafts had fired on her and her team, and they had shot the hovercrafts down. It didn't bring all of those people back though. She felt responsible for their deaths.

"Nice shooting, Soldier Everdeen," Lieutenant Jackson said with a smile. "The Capitol will be talking about that one for a long time." Katniss gave the second-in-command a cold look.

"And what about the people in that hospital? The people we just swore to protect? Will anyone be talking about them?" The Lieutenant's smile faded.

"Your message will move people, Katniss," Cressida said, leaning over in her seat. Katniss still felt uneasy around the young woman. She was Capitol-born but had run away to join the rebellion. She had brought her entire crew with her; two brothers, Castor and Pollux, as well as her assistant, Messalla. Pollux was the only normal-looking one of the group and he was an Avox. He kept swallowing oddly, which made Katniss anxious for some reason.

"This is the first that people are seeing and hearing you," Castor said eagerly. "As an adult, I mean. Some people may remember seeing you as a baby. The baby bird is all grown up!"

"Hey, that's good," Messalla nodded. "From baby bird to a full grown Mockingjay. Grown into her wings and her talons. She's ready to take full flight." He turned to Cressida, who nodded.

"Your father moved people, Katniss. You are about to do the same."

"Katniss?" She sighed when the old District 12 Victor walked into the hovercraft. He opened his arms and she ran into them.

"You ok," he grunted.

"We're fine. Were you hit?"

"Barely but the pilot said we needed to land anyway. We hid in a bunker while the action was going on. Arrived just in time to see you shoot those hovercrafts down. I thought it was your dad for a second." She smiled weakly but then it faded.

"Haymitch, all those people-"

"This is not your fault," he said firmly. "Do you hear me? The Capitol murdered them, not you."

"Haymitch, I can't do this," she angrily brushed her tears away. He moved her into a corner and gripped her shoulders.

"You can. You come from a strong family."

"They wanted to see something real, but-"

"Katniss, I saw you screaming at the camera. That was as real as it gets! And it was all you! I spoke to Commander Paylor. She wants to join us in 13, once she is sure the Capitol won't come back here. You impressed her."

"How did Dad do it," she asked softly. "How did he manage to speak to a nation of poor people?" Haymitch was about to speak but just as his eyes lit up, he clenched his jaw.

"Maybe I can show you."

"Huh?"

"Please be seated everyone," the pilot called. "We are preparing for take-off." Haymitch sat across from Katniss and pulled on his safety belt.

"Boggs is on his way back to 13 as well." Katniss sat straight up.

"Is he with them?"

"I don't know, sweetheart. Plutarch had to send in an emergency hovercraft and they barely managed to get away. I don't know anything beyond that. We will see when we get back." Katniss leaned against her seat and fell silent. She didn't know what she'd do if Peeta wasn't with the group. How was she supposed to lead this rebellion without her husband? It may have started as a fake marriage but her feelings for him were now very real, as was her fear that she would never see him again.

* * *

Someone gently shook her awake and she blinked sleepily to the side.

"We're almost to 13," Cressida whispered and she nodded. Everyone was stretching and massaging the stiffness out of their muscles as the hovercraft approached the hangar. Plutarch was waiting for them, looking quite jovial.

"I hear it was a success?" Katniss bit her tongue to keep her bitter words from spilling out. She merely nodded and brushed past him, Haymitch close behind. Cressida hastily fell into conversation with the former game-maker and Katniss could swear the woman had shot her a wink. She picked up her pace as she entered the bunkers, twisting her head this way and that.

"Katniss, slow down," Haymitch called behind her, but she ignored him, making her way to the hospital. Surely Peeta would be there. She didn't want to think about how bad his condition might be, but as long as he was there, she didn't really care. She ran right past Rye and nearly skidded into Colonel Boggs. He reached out to steady her but she shrugged him off.

"Where is he?"

"Katniss." Her blood ran cold at the Colonel's tone.

"Where's Peeta?"

"Katniss," Gale stepped in front of her. "We did everything we-"

"Then where is he," she said shrilly. "If you did everything you could, he should be here! He should be with you!"

"The Capitol did it again, Katniss," Rye approached from behind. His hands were stuffed into his pockets and his head hung low. "They poisoned him. He didn't know who we were. He didn't even know who he was. We were hoping your name would jog his memory, but…" he trailed off, chewing his lip. Katniss shook her head in disbelief.

"Your voice did do something at first," Boggs said firmly. "When you were singing, I could see a difference in him. But there's no telling what all they have done to him, or how much venom is in his blood now. I don't think anything short of seeing your face will snap him out of it now, and even then… it's a long shot, Katniss. He's been through so much."

"So what do you want me to do, huh? Forget about my husband while the country goes to war?"

"It was a contract, Katniss," Gale said angrily. "You married for money! I know you say you love him and I believe you do, but he's with them now! He's our enemy. And he has the power to turn lots of people against us. Even if we managed to bring him here, there is no guarantee he wouldn't have tried to kill you! That's what the Capitol has done. They've turned him into a weapon. And they're pointing him right at you!" Katniss was shaking with anger. Finnick, Ryen, Boggs, and Haymitch were all looking around, desperate to be away from the tension.

"Nothing short of seeing my face, huh? Alright. Sounds like I'm the only person who can save him. And I will." Her fists balled, she turned on her heel and stomped away. Gale exhaled and rubbed his face.

"Um, does someone need to go after her and make sure she doesn't get herself killed," Finnick asked with a raised brow.

"She needs some time. Maybe her sister can calm her down."

"I didn't know about the contract," Boggs said quietly.

"Contract or no, my brother has never loved another and she is the only one who can bring him back," Rye said quickly.

"Assuming we can get them face to face without him shooting her first," Gale snapped.

"Hawthorne makes a good point," Boggs shrugged. "I spoke to him. He didn't know who she is. According to him, he's married to someone named Lavinia. They've fed him fake memories, his whole past is a lie!"

"Poor Peeta," Finnick shook his head.

"Don't you mean poor Katniss," Gale scowled.

"I know firsthand what it's like to be intimate with someone you don't love," Finnick said bitterly. "I guarantee you that Peeta is questioning it in his mind. The way he spoke about Katniss in the Capitol tells me he wouldn't just accept all of this."

"He would if they tortured him enough," Boggs pointed out.

"Deep down there has to be a part of him that questions everything he knows right now. You said he changed when he heard her sing. Maybe that will be enough to get into his head. Make him really start asking himself if everything around him is real or not. You know him best, what do you think?" he addressed Rye.

"I agree with you. Peeta's love for Katniss goes way back to when he was a kid. All he ever wanted was to keep her safe. Even hijacked, I don't think that will go away."

"Ok, I need to get going," Haymitch pocketed his communicator. "I have an idea of how to help our Mockingjay."

"Does it involve Peeta?"

"It involves another man in her life, actually. See you all later." The men all frowned after him.

"Another man?" Gale shook his head.

"If Haymitch can do what I think he's going to do… Katniss may not need Peeta to do this after all."

* * *

Boggs and Rye were studying the interactive maps on the table while Gale sat in the corner and sorted his arrows. Finnick burst into the room, causing the men to look up, startled.

"I have an idea," the Victor exclaimed.

"Clearly. You wouldn't have burst in otherwise."

"Hear me out. Plutarch wants Katniss to do more propos, right? What if she sings in some of them?"

"How is that going to help anyone," Gale rolled his eyes.

"It will help Peeta! Boggs said her voice did something to him. So we broadcast her voice where he can't get away. He will question it, and in turn question his role in this war."

"Which could get him killed," Rye pointed out. "If Snow decides that he's not worth the trouble, they could just kill him."

"Seems to me they have been through an awful lot of trouble to keep him alive, though," Finnick said, looking considering. "There has to be a reason they just keep poisoning him rather than killing him and moving on to someone else."

"Katniss," Gale stood up. "They must think he is the only one who can kill her."

"Maybe. Maybe there's something else."

"What we need to do is show him what Snow did to 12. No one has seen it yet."

"You want Katniss to visit our bombed district?" Gale sounded angry and Rye sighed.

"I'll escort her."

"No, I'll escort her."

"Enough," Boggs said loudly. "Everdeen just returned from filming a propo in 8, where she witnessed a lot of people die. Plus she found out her husband is not coming home to her. Let's give her a little time." The men seemed surprised by Boggs's gentle tone.

"It's a good idea, Finnick. Let's talk to President Coin and see if we can get clearance to fly to 12. It's almost dinnertime, so let's head down."

* * *

When they arrived to the cafeteria, they all split into different directions. Posy leaped into Gale's arms and smiling, he sat down beside Vick, Rory sitting across from them. Boggs's wife and young daughter greeted him with kisses and he smiled as he embraced them both. Annie curled into Finnick's arms and he kissed her hair, his heart speeding up at the sight of her waiting for him. Rye walked over to where his family sat and Madge stood to wrap her arms around him. He glanced at his family, his shoulders slumping at the look on his father's face.

"He's not coming home?"

"We'll get him back, Dad. I promise." Bran swallowed and stared at his dinner. Rye sighed and sat next to his wife and brother. Bing clapped him on the shoulder.

"I'm sure you did everything you could." He nodded but still felt miserable. Madge's fingers wrapped around his and he squeezed.

"I think I'll go on to bed," Bran said as he pushed his tray away.

"Dad, please finish your dinner," Bing called after him but the baker was already halfway out of the cafeteria.

"So what went wrong," Mrs. Mellark asked, her brow raised.

"He didn't know who we were," Rye shrugged miserably. "They made him forget again. He didn't even react to Katniss's name."

"That might not be such a bad thing…"

"Mom," Rye said sharply. "She is the only person who can save him at this point. So will you please shut the hell up?" Her eyes flashed and she too pushed her tray away. Rye lowered his head to the table as his mother stormed out of the cafeteria.

"I'm so tired," he said softly. Madge caressed his hair and kissed the back of his neck.

"Did I miss anything here?" He looked around at his family.

"Quite boring, actually. We have our daily schedule printed on our arms and we just help out where we are needed. They give April extra time for meditation so she can rest. Apparently pregnancies are a big thing around here and they are being extra careful with her."

"It's nice but sort of annoying," April rubbed her belly. "We are still at least a month away and they treat me like I'm made of glass. I was still working in 12."

"They haven't had any babies in a long time," Madge said quietly. "They want to make sure you're safe and healthy."

"I guess we will head to bed now. You going to be alright, Rye?"

"Sure. My baby brother is in the Capitol thinking that he is someone else and his wife is here crying for him to come home. Why wouldn't I be alright?"

"It's not your fault, Rye," Bing gripped his shoulders. "Peeta's strong and he can overcome this. But it's not your fault that he's there." Rye shook his head and Madge draped her arm over his shoulder.

"I'll take care of him. You guys go get some rest." Bing squeezed her hand and helped April to her feet. Madge kissed Rye's hair.

"Let's go to bed," she whispered. He turned and buried his face in her chest.

"I need you to hold me tonight. I need you to tell me things are going to be alright." Madge cupped his chin and gave him a soft kiss. She didn't say anything as she pulled him away from the cafeteria and up to their compartment. She didn't speak as she undressed in front of him, then started to pull his uniform off. She lowered to her knees and flattened her tongue against his shaft, her hand moving slowly. He tilted his head back against the door and closed his eyes, his hand moving down to grip her blonde curls.

"Oh shit Madge," his teeth dug into his lip as she started to hollow out her cheeks. His eyes snapped open and he pulled her to her feet, kissing her until they were both breathless with want. Madge bent over the bed and Rye moaned at the sight, leaning over her to kiss her spine.

"Not like that," he whispered, pulling her up onto the bed. "Not tonight." She looked confused but allowed him to pull her into his lap while he stretched his legs out and leaned against the wall. "Tonight I want to see you," he whispered as he bent to take her nipple into his mouth. She cried out as she tilted her head back. "I want to look into your eyes. Because when I hold you like this, everything is ok."

"Everything will be alright," she whispered as she pushed his hair out of his eyes. "I love you, Rye."

"God I love you Madge," he brought her down on top of him and squeezed both of her cheeks. "I'm not going to last long."

"It's ok," she gasped, draping her arms around his neck. "Oh baby!" Droplets of sweat dripped down his face as he held on as long as he could. When they both finished, he wrapped his arms around her and hid his face in her neck. She didn't say anything as warm tears splashed her arms. She didn't want to tell him things would be alright again. She wasn't sure she even believed it. So she stayed silent and allowed him to cry in her arms.

* * *

Bran trudged along the darkened hallway, his hands stuffed into his pockets. He wasn't sure where he was going but he kept on walking. One of the compartment doors was wide open and soft light spread into the hallway. He paused, leaning in.

"You draw too? Is there anything you don't do, young lady?" Primrose jumped, startled, but her face relaxed into a smile.

"Plenty. But I sketch when I get stressed and it helps calm me down."

"Peeta is the same way," he said softly. "Or he was. I don't know if he still draws. But he was quite talented! Is… well, you know." Prim nodded and adjusted her sketch book.

"Katniss saved up for months to make me my own sketch book. She bought sheets of paper from the Hob and put it all together. Mom thinks drawing is a waste of time, but like I said, it calms me."

"Me too. Do you mind if I…?" She shook her head and held her book out for him to take. He flipped through it, whistling.

"These are incredible, Prim. You are very talented."

"Thanks," she went pink. "I'm trying to practice hands but they're so difficult."

"Ah, they're not that bad. Here," he sat on the edge of the bed and bent over the book. Prim peered over his shoulder and her eyes widened.

"How did you do that?"

"You just need to remember highlight and shadow. There, now you can add details. Don't forget the joints and the lines." He handed her the book and she lowered her head. He watched with a smile as her hand flew across the paper.

"Very good. That's much better."

"Thanks Mr. Mellark!"

"Call me Bran," he stood from the bed. His hands returned to his pockets and he turned to go.

"Bran," she called and he paused. "Do you think you could… I need some help with these flowers. I'm trying to draw a katniss flower for my sister, to maybe cheer her up, but it looks all wrong." He turned back and gave her a sad smile.

"You sound like someone else I know." She cocked her head, her drawing pad on her knee.

"Let's see it," he sat back down and flipped the pages. "This isn't bad at all. You just need some shading and detailing in the petals. Petals were Peeta's least favorite part too. Ok, let's start here…"

* * *

When Violet was finally finished with her nursing shift, she made her way back to her compartment, her feet dragging and her whole body aching. She rubbed the back of her neck and her shoulders and she paused when she heard laughter coming from the compartment. Not just her daughter's but a man's as well. She peered in and her eyes widened.

Bran was sitting on the bed with Prim, showing her how to draw. Violet watched with fear in her eyes.

"Bran," she said loudly, making him jump to his feet, the drawing pad falling to the floor. "What are you doing here?"

"I'm sorry Violet, I know it's late. Primrose asked for some help with her drawing."

"That's nice of you. But won't Margaret be missing you?" Bran looked uncomfortable and his hands returned to his pockets.

"Yes, you're right, of course. Um, well goodnight Primrose. Violet."

"Thanks again, Bran," Prim said cheerfully. Bran gave her another sad smile as he rounded the corner.

"Ugh Mom, that was kind of rude. We were having fun."

"It's inappropriate, Prim. And his wife would be furious if she knew where he was." Prim rolled her eyes.

"Probably why he was wandering around. Wanted to get away from his witch of a wife for awhile."

"Where's Katniss," Violet quickly changed the subject.

"Hiding in one of her spots. She's not doing well. I assume you heard the news?"

"Vick and Posy stopped in to say they were back. They didn't know anything though. Peeta wasn't with them?" Prim shook her head sadly.

"I'm scared, Mom. What if he never returns to her? She loves him. I mean really loves him."

"She's a strong young lady. She'll survive this." Prim bent to pick up her sketch pad.

"Why didn't you come down to the hospital wing instead of sitting up here, drawing?"

"I just needed to calm down a little. Drawing helps clear my head." Violet pursed her lips but said nothing else as she pulled her uniform off. Prim studied Bran's katniss flower, trying to replicate it.

"Will you please go find your sister? We need to have lights out soon."

"Ok," she said doubtfully, putting her sketch book on the bedside table. She peered out into the dark hallway and wrapped her shawl tighter. In truth, she knew Katniss could be anywhere. Haymitch had been the one who told her that her sister liked to hide in the various closets to get away from everyone. She wanted to give Katniss space but knew her mother was worried about her. She wandered up and down the halls, sighing heavily as it got later and later. Finally, she gave up, knowing that Katniss would return to them when she was ready, and made her way back to the compartment. Her mother was already asleep, the covers pulled up over her head so Prim pulled on her sleep shirt and fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow. She had a feeling Katniss would be back with them in the morning, though she had no idea the state she would be in.


	58. Chapter 58

Peeta closed and locked the door behind them and turned to his wife.

"I need you to tell me the truth."

"About what," she blinked in surprise.

"Are we really married?"

"Of course we are," she held up her hand, where a huge flashy ring rested on her finger. Peeta frowned. He would never pick anything like that. It must have been her choosing.

"Do you know anyone named Katniss?"

"Who?" His brow furrowed even further.

"The name doesn't sound familiar at all?"

"Peter, you're starting to scare me. Maybe you'd like to go lie down and-"

"I'm not tired, but I'm sick of the lies! All the back and forth going on around me and inside my head. People tell me one thing, then someone else tells me another. I don't know who to trust anymore! Please say I can trust my own wife."

"Peter, you know if you have a question, you can come to me. I've known you since we were young."

"So it was an arranged marriage?"

"Yes," she said slowly. "But what does that-"

"And that's my child?" Her hands instinctively covered her belly.

"Of- of course." He didn't miss her hesitation and he crossed his arms.

"President Snow says you were in love with someone else but that we married out of duty." She looked shocked.

"That's… correct."

"I'm a very passionate person, Lavinia. I always have been. I have always wanted to marry for love, nothing else. That just doesn't sound like me."

"Well I… I don't know what to tell you, Peter! You're upsetting me. Just… go take a shower or something." She hurried away from him and into their bedroom.

Sighing heavily, Peeta ran his fingers through his hair and went into the bathroom.

After a scalding shower, he felt better but the thoughts still raced in his mind. He toweled his hair dry, then wrapped the towel around his waist and opened the bathroom door. Lavinia surprised him, waiting for him on the other side.

"I'm sorry, Peter," she said softly before her lips met his. He gasped, his arms flying into the air as her hands drifted down his sides.

"It's the hormones," she said with a shrug. "I get so emotional these days. And you have been under such stress, I should be more understanding." Peeta tried to shake his head but she backed him against the wall.

"I know how to make you feel better." She knelt in front of him and his eyes widened as she fingered the towel.

"Lavinia," he pressed himself against the wall, shaking his head. "You don't love me. Why are you doing this?" He could feel her hands trembling as they made their way up and down the backs of his legs.

"I've done this more than a few times to survive," she said so quietly he could barely hear her.

But he heard it. He swallowed and clutched his towel, holding it in place.

"Peet... Peter," she stammered, moving her hands under the towel to massage his ass. "Let me do this for you." She pulled the towel away and ran her palm up his shaft. He grunted, his teeth digging into his lip as his head hit the wall. She leaned forward, closing her mouth around him and hollowing out her cheeks. His eyes met hers... those grey eyes, so familiar. But now they were full of sadness, guilt, and pain.

His eyes slammed shut and he blocked out the visions of familiar grey eyes and sweet smiles. His hands sank into her hair as he jerked forward, causing her to gag. He fucked her mouth, tossing his head back and groaning as he chased his release. When he came, she coughed and sputtered, falling backwards. Peeta leaned against the wall, his chest heaving. He glanced down at his wife, who was shaking with sobs.

"Clean yourself up," he said bitterly, picking up his towel. "We're having dinner with the senators and their wives soon." He closed himself in the bedroom, closing his eyes and willing the heart wrenching sobs to stop.

* * *

When he heard Lavinia start the shower, he opened the bedroom door and walked into the living room. He crossed to his bookshelf, running his hands over the spines. Surely he had some sort of picture albums, or even a photograph of their wedding day. Something to prove that it was real.

But he saw nothing. Titles of books that were too long and difficult for him to pronounce, let alone read. Capitol propaganda that he was pretty sure he wouldn't keep in his house, even if he was a loyal Peacekeeper. Nothing seemed to make sense anymore.

Unless…

He glanced at himself in the mirror that was hanging beside the door and studied his reflection. His long fingers reached up to touch his face. They made their way to his hair and his brow furrowed.

"Peeta," he mouthed. It didn't feel as strange as hearing it had been. "Peeta," he said again.

"Katniss." He shivered, though he wasn't entirely sure why. "Katniss."

"Officer Mellark," he heard in his head. Her voice was low and smoky, soft and soothing.

"Please dispense with the formalities, Katniss. We've known each other since we were children. I'm still just Peeta."

He pressed his hand to the wall and searched his reflection, for what, he didn't know.

"My boy with the bread." He gasped and his hand flew to his chest.

They had to be right. Duartyr and Aurelia and Colonel Boggs… why else would his heart start racing at the sound of her name? Even though a part of him couldn't remember her, he had a feeling his love for her went deeper than the poison could have gone.

But then who was Lavinia and why was she playing along? She had to be forced into it. Why else would she look so miserable?

Peeta felt sick at the thought that he was living with another man's wife, who had a child on the way. And what he had just done… his hand clapped to his mouth as he ran to the kitchen, emptying his stomach into the sink.

He clutched the counter and squeezed his eyes shut. He had to make things right. He needed to find a way to get in touch with this… Katniss, so he could find out once and for all.

Who could he trust in the Capitol though? Duartyr was dead and Peeta knew many of the board members' loyalty to Snow was unyielding. He heard the water shut off in the bathroom and was prepared to question her when she came out. The phone, however, interrupted his thoughts and he held it up to his ear.

"Mellark."

"General Mellark. I have an assignment for you. Prepare to leave immediately."

* * *

Katniss squeezed her knees to her chest. She had lost track of how long she had been in this supplies closet but she ignored her growling stomach and rested her cheek on her knee. What was she going to do? Coin wouldn't risk another rescue attempt. According to Boggs, Peeta was lost to them. But she refused to believe that. He had been hijacked before and he hadn't forgotten her.

"If I'm ever their prisoner again," he had said, "I'll just think of this and I'll be fine. Your kisses and your touch will keep me alive."

She blinked back tears and angrily rubbed at her face.

If her husband wasn't coming home, she wanted the Capitol to pay.

* * *

Coin and Boggs looked up in surprise as Katniss burst into the control room.

"I'm ready, President Coin. I fully embrace my role as the Mockingjay." Coin nodded, a grim smile on her face and Katniss planted her palms on the table.

"One condition. I kill Snow."

"When the time comes, I'll flip you for it. I didn't have the honor of saying farewell to Corialanus Snow, so I have to settle for his son."

"Caius Snow has hijacked my husband. He's made him forget his life, again. And he tried to make Finnick rape me before a room full of people. I will be the one to kill him."

"Very well, Soldier. We have a job for you then." Coin gestured toward Boggs.

"Katniss, the world hasn't seen what has happened to 12. We want you to show them. You can talk about your father, you can talk about Peeta. Make it personal. Work with Cressida to figure out what works best. We want this done soon."

"I'll have Cinna help me get ready," she said in a strong voice before leaving the room. Boggs glanced at Coin uncertainly.

"Quite a turn-around. Didn't expect her to come out of her room for awhile."

"Perhaps she has seen that he is a lost cause. Now the soldier can fully emerge. Grief has no place in war." Boggs looked considering and went back to studying the plans.

"I want to plan an invasion."

"President Coin, we're not ready for that."

"We can be. Soon. We can get the team ready and use the holo to plot out their route. I want you to lead them."

"But-"

"The country needs to see her in action," she spoke over him. "That's what everyone has said. I'll send Cressida and her team along to get some good footage. They won't be in any real danger."

"Anyone in the Capitol will be in danger," he protested.

"Colonel Boggs, I'm ordering you to organize a team. You can include Odair and Mason too. Show the country we have Victors on our side."

"Odair is getting married. I wouldn't want him to leave his new bride."

"Emotions, like grief, have no place in war, Colonel." Boggs swallowed.

"Yes Madame President."

* * *

Katniss hesitantly knocked on Cinna's door and gasped when it was yanked open. Chase's smiling face was on the other side and he grabbed her hand.

"Get in here, gorgeous!" He pulled her in for a hug and she stiffened, completely at loss as to what was going on.

"Chase, you're scaring her." She pulled away to face Cinna, who was beaming.

"What are you so happy about?"

"We're getting married," Chase burst out. Katniss's jaw dropped and Cinna held up his hand, where a silver band was gleaming.

"Chase asked me a few minutes ago and I said yes."

"Congratulations!" She embraced both men tightly. Cinna pulled her back and set his hands on her shoulders.

"I didn't want to tell you. I know you're so scared right now, and going through a lot-"

"Don't think about me," she shrugged him off. "I'm so happy for you both! I was actually really afraid that… well, you've both been distant with each other…" Chase and Cinna exchanged a weak smile.

"13 refused to give us a compartment together unless we were married. I suggested it but Cinna said we needed to focus on the rebellion and on you. But we started to miss each other and it was even harder than it was in the Capitol, what with our different schedules and such. I only saw him at dinner. Well, I came in this morning and said I loved him too much to let him get away from me and lots of other romantic sappy stuff that I won't bore you with. Point is, now 13 has to plan two weddings!"

"Two?"

"Finnick and Annie are getting married," Cinna said with a smile. "Didn't he tell you?"

"He didn't." Katniss felt a little upset that she had been left out of the happy news. She was sure they didn't want to upset her, with Peeta and all, but she was genuinely happy for her friends. She took Chase's and Cinna's hands.

"Well time to stop focusing on me and start focusing on your big day. I'm truly happy for you both." They pulled her in for a hug.

"We'll still be focused on propos for awhile. Is that why you came up here?"

"You've heard already?"

"Well Plutarch said we need to start planning your next one already but I didn't think it would be this soon."

"I'm going to 12," she nodded and their faces fell. "I want to show Panem what the Capitol did to my home."

"Katniss, are you sure-"

"Peeta needs to see it too. Whether he will remember or not, I don't know, but the bakery was completely destroyed. His childhood home. I need to show everyone what Snow has done."

"We are with you til the end, Girl on Fire."

"Coin has called a mandatory meeting before dinner," Cinna said softly. "I wonder if she plans to show your propo from 8."

"I don't know. Cressida mentioned she has to do some editing and all kinds of stuff so I sort of doubt it will be ready by tonight."

"Don't underestimate Cress," Cinna smiled. "She and her team work quickly."

"Do you know her well?"

"I met her a few times working on tributes' stories. She's interviewed me a couple of times. It doesn't surprise me that she's come over to our side. She hated the way tributes were treated. She was always a bit of a rebel, growing up."

"Isn't she the one who dropped water balloons on Snow and his board when they announced the Quarter Quell?"

"Yep, that's her," Cinna laughed. Katniss's eyes widened.

"And she's still alive?"

"She was too talented to get rid of. You can trust her, Katniss, she can help you a lot with this."

"Good to hear. Well I'll let you two have some privacy. I'll see you soon." She squeezed both their hands before closing the door behind her. Chase grinned and turned back to Cinna, draping his arms around his neck.

"What would my fiance like to do until dinner?" Cinna grinned, leaning in to kiss him and they both fell to the bed in a tangle of limbs.

* * *

Katniss hurried down the hall and nearly ran right into Haymitch.

"Hey old man, you look a million miles away," she rubbed her shoulder.

"Sorry sweetheart. I was actually looking for you."

"For me? Why?"

"Are you doing anything right now?"

"I was on my way to yell at Finnick for not telling me he's engaged."

"Put the yelling on hold for a bit. I'd like for you to come with me to the studio. I have something you need to see."

* * *

 _ **Sorry it's so short guys but work has been insanely busy and I didn't want too much time to go by without posting! Will post a longer one next week! :)**_

 _ **XOXOXO**_


	59. Chapter 59

When Katniss and Haymitch entered the studio, Katniss's knees nearly gave way under her. On the huge screen in front of her was a man with dark hair and dirt-streaked olive cheeks. The video was paused so Katniss turned to Haymitch, her brow furrowed.

"What is this?"

"I reached out to some people for help, to track these down. I figured this would help you." Katniss edged closer and touched the man's face. Haymitch pressed a button and the man moved. He had a kindly smile and a gentle laugh.

"Katniss, come here my flower." A young girl toddled onto the screen, her dark hair in two braids. Katniss's eyes widened.

"This is my daughter, Katniss," the man spoke in a tone that was strong and confident. He pulled the little girl into his lap and kissed her hair.

"It's because of her that we need things to change. The millions of children around Panem need things to change. The Snow Administration has been poisoning Panem slowly, causing certain areas to decay faster than others. But if we leave it unattended, the country will die. The people will die with it. Look around your district. Are you happy with the way things are? Do you live in fear, every day, that your child's name will come out of a Reaping bowl? Or perhaps you have already lost a child to the Hunger Games. Two children, if you're twice as unfortunate. These atrocities won't stop until the Snow Administration has been wiped out." The man wrapped his arms around the child and started to rock her gently, humming softly.

"I hear a low faint voice that says, Papa and Ma are dead." Katniss closed her eyes and her lips started to move.

"And it comes from the poor orphan child that must be clothed and fed." The man positioned the child on his lap and pressed his forehead to hers.

"Think of the many children now, poor little boys and girls Who once had mother's loving hands to smooth their golden curls." The little girl was singing along with her father now, her fingers tugging at the dark braids that lay beside her cheeks.

"But now we see those wandering curls hang careless 'round their brow. They say to us my Papa's dead and I've no mother now…" The child reached her hand up to touch her father's face and Katniss's palm pressed against the screen.

"And it comes from the poor orphan child that must be clothed and fed. And it comes from the poor orphan child that must be clothed and fed." Haymitch watched Katniss sing along with her father, their voices so similar and soothing that he closed his eyes. When the song finished, the man smiled at the camera.

"My little songbird," he indicated his daughter on his lap. "Her mama don't like those types of songs but I say they're important to teach to our little ones. It's the life we're living. Orphaned children because their mamas and daddies are starving to death, or working themselves into the grave. Raise up your voice to join my song. Have the courage to stand with the rebellion." He glanced sideways at his daughter, then brought his finger to his lips before the screen went black. Katniss turned to Haymitch, her jaw open.

"He filmed lots of these. The older you got, the more involved you were. Your mother lost it when she found out. She said under no circumstances were you to be used as a political puppet, but Ash knew seeing a father and a daughter together in the meadow would touch people. And it did."

"Did he ever have Prim with him in these?" He hesitated for a moment.

"He talked about her but he never had her with him. Just his songbird. The heads of the districts who were a part of the rebellion were stunned by your voice. When you two sang together, it was otherworldly! I often sat nearby and listened while the film crew worked with him."

"You did all of this out in the open?"

"We were smart about it, Katniss. We had people keeping watch and the peacekeepers on our side made sure the meadow wasn't bugged or anything. We even did some of them in Victor's Village, because we knew it was safe." Katniss shook her head. Her father had died, hadn't he?

"So how did Snow find out? If you were so smart about it, why was he discovered?"

"Sweetheart, it's not that simple. You always have a traitor in your midst. As the idea of the Mockingjay got more popular, more people wanted to join the cause. We couldn't just screen everyone, we had to trust them. We were careful but we are... fairly certain we know who reported us to Snow."

"And are they still alive?" Haymitch swallowed thickly and Katniss's eyes flashed.

"Haymitch. Is that person still alive?"

"I think so," he said slowly. "I'm not sure if they made it to 13."

"Why? Why weren't they punished? They're responsible for all those miners' deaths! Including my father!"

"You gotta calm down, sweetheart," he reached out toward her but she jerked back.

"I want to know who it is."

"It won't do any good, Katniss-"

"You know who killed my father!"

"The Capitol killed your father! Snow killed your father!"

"Tell me who it is! I want to talk to them. I want to ask them why they told on someone in their own district… I assume they are from 12?"

"Katniss, this is… it's a lot more complicated than you think. It wasn't supposed to end up the way it did. The party involved… it wasn't about the revolution. Not really. It was more about revenge. And they didn't imagine the Capitol would retaliate the way it felt terrible after-"

"Anybody who reports a rebellion to the Capitol has to know it will end with death! Tell me who it is."

"Did you ever meet the Milliner?" Katniss snorted.

"I've never had any reason to go into a milliner's shop. We can't afford food, we don't need a hat."

"Ok. The man who runs the shop now inherited it from his father. Lester Farville. Lester had two sons and a daughter."

"What does this have to do with anything, Haymitch?"

"Hey, don't get snippy with me. You asked, now I'm answering." Katniss nodded and crossed her arms. Haymitch pulled her over to a chair.

"So Farville has two sons and a daughter," Katniss shrugged. "Do I care about their names?"

"Michael, who runs the shop now, Morgan, and Margaret." Katniss held up her hands in exasperation, clearly baffled, but Haymitch merely stared at her, as if trying to tell her something with his eyes.

"Where's our big star," a voice behind them made them jump to their feet. Plutarch opened his arms as if he was going to embrace Katniss.

"Someone passing down the hall said they heard someone singing in here. Said it was really beautiful, so I knew it had to be our Mockingjay."

"Actually, it was the former Mockingjay," Katniss waved to the screen.

"Haymitch told me he was going to track down some videos of your father! Katniss, you must record the songs and Cressida can align them with your father's! Two Mockingjays singing!"

"That's actually a great idea," Haymitch nodded. "You can watch the rest of these and learn the songs. I'll be back later to check on you." Katniss's eyes narrowed as he rushed out of the room.

"Don't think you're getting away from me that easily, old man," she muttered under her breath.

* * *

Finnick and Annie refused to break their grasp all the way down the hall, even when they ran out of space. When the hall became too narrow, Annie would step in front of him and drape his arm around her neck, their fingers still entwined. Finnick smiled and kissed her cheek, making her giggle, which in turn would make his heart soar. They had never been allowed to be this open with each other. Even when they were home in 4, they were always being watched and Finnick did everything he could to keep her safe from Snow. Now they were finally getting married and he still couldn't really believe it.

They passed one of the studios and he heard a man singing. He stopped, squeezing Annie's hand to stop her as well. They listened for a moment and a woman's voice joined in with the man's. Finnick put a finger to his lips and peered into the studio. Katniss was sitting spread-eagle on the floor, her face tilted up at the screen. Her lips were moving and her eyes were closed. She looked more at peace than he had seen her in a long time.

He gently knocked on the door, not wanting to startle her. Katniss looked over her shoulder and jumped to her feet.

"Hey."

"Wow, he really does have a mystical voice," Finnick nodded toward the screen. Katniss crossed her arms over her chest and nodded.

"You sounded amazing too, Katniss," Annie said with wide eyes.

"Thanks. Plutarch wants Cressida to do something where she has my dad and me singing together. Thinks it will stir people."

"It definitely will," Finnick nodded. "People need to be engaged, and hearing both Mockingjays will definitely do it!"

"Speaking of engaged," Katniss's eyes flashed. "How come I'm the last one to know that you're getting married?"

"Oh, we wanted to tell you, Katniss! It's just, with the mission to the Capitol… and Peeta…" she trailed off, biting her lip.

"I'm happy for both of you," Katniss said firmly. "You deserve it."

"Thank you," Annie said warmly, squeezing Katniss's hand. "I have no idea what I'm going to wear! I suppose our coveralls will have to do."

"You know, I am getting ready to do a propo in 12. I could bring you back something...if anything survived. Peeta bought me several dresses before we left for the Capitol. They aren't fancy at all but they're not coveralls. And we are about the same size."

"That's so kind of you, Katniss," Annie squealed.

"You're going to 12," Finnick asked in surprise.

"Coin wants to show Panem what the Capitol did to 12. And I want Peeta to see. If he doesn't recognize the place he grew up, where he saved my life, there's no bringing him back. I have to try."

"I'll go with you, as a bodyguard." Katniss shook her head.

"You should be planning your wedding to the woman you love. I'll be fine. Gale and Rory will probably go with me. 12 was our home, after all."

"Just be careful." She nodded and he patted her shoulder. She turned back to the screen and resumed the video. The studio was filled with the coal miner's rich voice and Finnick was captivated for a moment.

"We must rise up against the Capitol that has oppressed us for so long," Ash Everdeen said in a clear, angry voice. "We must stoke the flames of rebellion. Do not let the Capitol continue to silence us. Join in our song! Join the revolution!"

"I can see why he wanted you to continue his work," Finnick said softly.

"I wish I was more like him."

"You already are, Katniss. You're already the Mockingjay."

* * *

Peeta wanted to avoid Lavinia at all costs, but he had been ordered to start packing, and Peeta didn't disobey orders. He gently knocked on the bedroom door and cleared his throat.

"Sorry Lavinia, I just need to get in to find a suitcase." She opened the door, her brow furrowed.

"Suitcase?"

"I have orders to leave immediately. My apologies, I won't be able to escort you to dinner tonight." He pushed past her and went to the closet.

"Orders from whom?"

"President Snow. He's ordered me to deal with the refugee camps that have been built from here to District 12."

"Deal with," Lavinia said faintly. "You mean murder."

"He wants me to eliminate any threat of a rebellion," he said firmly. "This means eliminating the people who are likely to engage in rebellious activity." Lavinia shook her head in disgust.

"Do you have any idea of who you were before… all of this?" Frowning, he looked up at her.

"All of what?"

"The Capitol. The Peacekeepers. What they did to you, all those years ago." Peeta stood slowly and gripped his bag.

"What are you talking about?"

"You weren't always a peacekeeper, Peeta. You were good and decent and kind. And then the Snows twisted you and made you into… this," she gestured toward him, her nose wrinkled in anger. She turned away, shaking her head and he wanted to reach out toward her but a voice in his head made him pause.

"When you put that uniform on, it's like...like you become someone else...someone who is cold and calculated and works for the man I despise." Peeta looked at his hands and back at Lavinia. Somehow, he knew it wasn't her voice he was hearing in his head.

"I have to find a way to separate the two, to remember that it's really you in there and not a cold-hearted monster." He hadn't always been a monster. Lavina told him but someone else had told him that before. Someone who cared a great deal about him.

"I told you that you're good and just, and I still mean that but it's strange to see that side of you."

Peeta shook his head and ran his fingers through his hair.

"You're good, Peeta, and kind and generous. You're not this cold figure the Capitol has twisted into some kind of-" Peeta waited for the unknown voice to finish her thought.

"Some kind of what?"

"What," Lavinia didn't even glance his way.

"I just… never mind." He watched her twist her wedding ring nervously. He searched his memories, anything to tell him that she was telling the truth. In some way, he wanted her to be telling the truth. It would make things much easier. Because if this was all a lie, he was about to embark on a very dangerous path.

"Are you going to tell me?" Lavinia glanced at him over her shoulder.

"Tell you what?"

"Who I really am." She turned to face him and exhaled deeply.

"I can't do that, Peter. Only you can answer that. I just know you're a better man than this. Murdering innocent people isn't who you are and the first part of knowing who you really are, is by questioning what you think you know." Peeta's head was spinning.

"You can come with me," he offered. "Get away from all of this. Whatever he has on you, I can protect you."

"No you can't, Peter. None of us are ever really safe." He approached her and she found herself craning her neck to look up at him.

"You can tell me the truth," he whispered. "Set both of us free." Her eyes filled with tears as she opened her mouth to speak. She exhaled sharply and took a step back.

"You're still talking nonsense. Have a safe trip and I'll see you when you get back. Perhaps you will be a father when you return." He swallowed thickly, his eyes drifting down to her belly.

"Perhaps. If I were the real father, though, I imagine you would be fighting harder for me to stay with you." She gasped as he turned back to the closet and started to shove clothes into his bag. He rose and left the room without another word.

* * *

Peeta nodded to the driver as he passed over his bag and he slid into the back seat of the car. Halfway down the road, the driver paused and pulled over.

"General Mellark, there's a call for you, sir." He took the device from the driver and held it to his ear.

"Mellark."

"General Mellark, this is Minister Antonius."

"What can I do for you, Minister?"

"I'm sending you the latest footage of that cursed Mockingjay. Your travel plans have been altered. Since her current location is confirmed, your flight plan has changed. Your orders are to capture the Mockingjay and bring her back to the Capitol, alive. If you cannot do this safely, we expect you to deal with the situation yourself." Peeta swallowed, his grip on the device tightening.

"Understood sir. Where is she now?"

"District 12."


	60. Chapter 60

"Remember Katniss, this whole area has been swept and we will be watching from the air." Katniss nodded to show she understood, her eyes on the hovercraft door.

"Are you sure you want to do this alone," Gale asked softly.

"I need to. I need to see it. And then I need to show Panem."

"We will circle twice, as we discussed, and then we'll land," Haymitch said. "Cressida and her crew will be ready. Gale, Rory, and Rye will guard your flanks. Boggs will remain behind to ready to the hovercraft in case of emergency evacuation. Be  
careful, Katniss." She nodded and stepped out onto the gravel.

Her immediate thought was regret. There was no way she could do this. The air smelled of death. Bones littered the gravel that she stood on. The Justice Building in front of her was a pile of bricks. She very nearly backed right up into the hovercraft and demanded they take her back 13.

She was the Mockingjay. She was her father's daughter. She could do this.

Katniss took a step forward, followed by another. She lifted her chin and let out a shaky breath. She had never seen the district so still. Even before the sun rose, the workers were hurrying off to the mines.  
She felt her stomach start to roll as she realized what was in front of her. The whipping post, which she and Peeta had been bound to. She closed her eyes and felt the sting of the whip on her back. The sight of Peeta's mutilated flesh came flooding to the front of her mind and she clutched her stomach, bending over just in time to expel everything from her stomach. She reached out to steady herself but yanked her hand back from the post. It was ironic, she thought, that this thing had survived the bombing.

She shook her head and continued on. She was tempted to enter the Justice Building and see if anything in Peeta's office had survived.

"Everything ok, Katniss," she heard Haymitch's voice in her ear.

"Fine," she said quickly, and continued walking. She didn't want them to know how weak she was feeling.  
She continued on, keeping her eyes raised and straight ahead. She didn't want to see the many faces staring up at her. Twice she had stepped on a skull and had nearly fainted. But she knew they were above her, watching her, and she forced herself to put on a brave face.

When she approached the bakery, she froze. There was nothing but a charred oven and the trunk of a tree. She moved closer, kneeling next to the tree trunk. It was underneath this tree that Peeta had saved her life. Before he had given her that bread, she had curled up against the trunk, losing all hope. She reached out and shakily trailed her fingertips across the charred wood.

"Can you believe this is the same place we came to trade," a soft voice said behind her.

"What are you doing here?" She kept her eyes trained on the remains of the bakery.

"We gave you a little more time than planned. Haymitch wanted to land. Cress is getting her crew ready, back at the Justice Building." She felt someone else approach and she turned to see Rye gaping at his childhood home.

"Doesn't seem real, does it," he said stiffly.

"I'm so sorry, Rye," she reached for his hand.

"This would make Peet cry. He loved this bakery. Even though he's the youngest, he begged Dad to let him have it. Mom insisted it should go to Bing, but Bing said he didn't want it. And I've never been much for baking. I would have let Peet have it. He could make works of art out of those cakes."

"I remember," Katniss muttered. Rye glanced sideways at her, then moved toward the bakery. Katniss hung back and pressed her palm to the tree stump again.

 _Are you, are you_  
 _Coming to the tree_  
 _They strung up a man_  
 _They say who murdered three_  
 _Strange things did happen here_  
 _No stranger would it be_  
 _If we met at midnight_  
 _In the hanging tree_  
 _Are you, are you_  
 _Coming to the tree_  
 _Where dead man called out_  
 _For his love to flee_  
 _Strange things did happen here_  
 _No stranger would it be_  
 _If we met at midnight_  
 _In the hanging tree."_

Katniss didn't notice Cressida's film crew sneaking up with their cameras rolling, or Rye lowering his head and shedding silent tears, or Haymitch tucking several files into his bag, his eyes trained on Katniss. She didn't notice any of it, because she was singing to Peeta, wherever he was. She imagined him right in front of her, begging for her to continue. He had told her he'd been enchanted by her voice. She sat against the tree stump, pulling her knees to her chest and tilting her head back to sing.

 _Are you, are you_  
 _Coming to the tree_  
 _Where I told you to run_  
 _So we'd both be free_  
 _Strange things did happen here_  
 _No stranger would it be_  
 _If we met at midnight_  
 _In the hanging tree_  
 _Are you, are you_  
 _Coming to the tree_  
 _Wear a necklace of rope_  
 _Side by side with me_  
 _Strange things did happen here_  
 _No stranger would it be_  
 _If we met at midnight_  
 _In the hanging tree_

As she finished the song, she buried her face in her hands and allowed the tears to come.

"Katniss," Cressida said gently. "Can you tell us about this place? It's obviously meaningful to you, isn't it?"

"This is the bakery that Peeta grew up in." Cressida motioned to her crew and she knelt in front of Katniss.

"How did you meet Peeta?" Katniss lifted her head and swallowed.

"I met him on my first day of school. He offered me a cookie. He was very sweet. I didn't talk to him again after that. When I was 11, my father died and essentially took my mother with him. She wasn't able to work so we nearly starved. My little sister was dying. I took some old baby clothes to town to try to sell, but it was raining horribly. I was rooting through the baker's dumpster when his wife came out and chased me away. She said she would call the peacekeepers on me, and I watched until she went back inside. I collapsed near the bakery, right next to this tree." She reached out to touch it again. "I was so weak that I couldn't move. I hadn't eaten in days. My eyesight was so blurry from hunger. I was nearly frozen because my coat was so ragged. I was sure I would die right here. I heard the door open again and I was too weak to care if the baker's wife was coming back. But it wasn't her. It was him." She looked to the bakery and Cressida actually turned, sure there was someone there. Rye listened with his jaw agape. He knew his brother had saved Katniss's life, but he'd never been told the full story. Katniss's eyes were glassy as she continued to talk in a low voice. Castor moved closer so he wouldn't miss a word.

"He came outside, with his mother following him, screaming at him and hitting him. When she went back inside, he threw the bread to me and when our eyes met, I knew he had meant for me to have it. I ran back home as fast as I could, with those two loaves hidden under my jacket. I made a salad from greens I gathered outside and it was the first real meal we had eaten in months. That bread gave us hope and Peeta took a beating for a girl he barely knew. He started to sneak sweets and bread into my locker at school. The first time we actually spoke was when he returned to 12 as a peacekeeper. And he asked me to marry him."

"He was already in love with you," Cressida said with a smile.

"I guess so." Katniss nodded, attempting a weak smile. "That's what he said."

"The Capitol is holding him prisoner and you are in 13. How are you doing, being separated from him?"

"Not well," she replied. Understatement, she mentally chastised herself. "I know at any moment he could be killed. But because of what they're putting him through, I don't have any reservations anymore. About doing whatever it takes to destroy the  
Capitol. I'm finally free." She turned her gaze skyward and watched the flight of a hawk across the sky. "Peeta once told me that the Capitol was fragile. At the time, I didn't know what he meant. It was hard to see clearly because I was so afraid. Now I'm not. The Capitol's fragile because it depends on the districts for everything. Food, energy, even the Peacekeepers that police us. If we declare our freedom, the Capitol collapses. Caius Snow, thanks to you, I'm officially declaring mine today."

"That was fantastic, Katniss. Well done. Ok Pollux, let's get some footage in front of the Justice Building. Haymitch, did you get what you needed?"

"Yeah," Haymitch grunted, patting his bag.

"I want to go to Peeta's house and see if I can find something for Annie to wear for her wedding." Rory and Gale walked behind her as they continued toward the peacekeepers' part of town.

"It's scary, how quiet it is," Rory mumbled. Katniss sucked in a breath when they approached Peeta's house. Most of it was gone and she felt sick again.

"Come on," Gale said softly, tugging her arm. He stepped through the rubble, lifting boards and picking things up as he went. She stepped on a picture, cracking the glass, but stifled a sob when she saw the picture was whole. Her father smiled up  
at her and she clutched the frame to her chest.

"I wish I had a picture of Peeta," she whispered.

"There weren't many," Rye said at her side. "Mom didn't keep many pictures around."

"Hey Katniss, check this out." Rory held up what looked like a drawer and Katniss pulled out a silky green dress. It looked untouched.

"No way," Gale said in disbelief. Katniss held it up, eyes wide. It looked new. Peeta must have had just ordered this, because the Capitol tags were still on it. Maybe the Capitol had some kind of flame-resistant fabric or something, she reasoned. It  
was the only one that had survived, but she was thankful at least one did. Despite it being from the Capitol, Katniss loved it and thought it would look perfect on Annie.

She draped the dress over her arm and continued to shuffle around. It was hard to see Peeta's belongings scattered about, burned beyond recognition. She was glad he had packed his sketchbooks before they had left the district. She couldn't imagine all of his art being lost. Rye appeared in the rubble, looking anxious.

"Oh no," he muttered, throwing boards this way and that, obviously looking for something.

"What, Rye?"

"Just… something that Peet bought. I really hope… maybe he packed it before he left."

"What is it?" But he didn't answer her, overturning boards and boxes instead.

"Hey, we should probably get back," Haymitch called from the end of the path. "Cressida, you got everything you need?"

"We should be good," she said, adjusting her bag.

"Ok. Let's get back to the hovercraft." They trudged back to the center of town and Cressida's team boarded the hovercraft. Rory went next, followed by Gale. Katniss saw Haymitch lift his face to the sky, his brow furrowed.

"What is it, Haymitch?" Haymitch and Boggs exchanged looks.

"I don't know. Too quiet for my liking. Let's get back to 13." He hurried her on board and went to speak to the pilot. Katniss clutched the dress and the picture all the way back to 13, feeling exhausted from the journey. As they flew over the trees,  
she heard Gale speak from across from her.

"What if we had just run away to the woods one day?" Katniss lifted her head and frowned over at him. He was staring out the window, looking wistful.

"We could have done it. Survived by hunting and gathering. Built a nice little house. Just forget about the Capitol and what they've done."

"You think Haymitch would have let me run away? Knowing I would be the Mockingjay one day?" Gale scoffed.

"Old man couldn't have stopped you."

"Old man could stop you," Haymitch said behind them. "And she's right. I would have kept her from running off with you, Hawthorne. You're not her destiny or her future." Gale scowled deeply and went to sit at the back of the hovercraft. Haymitch  
took his vacated seat and rolled his eyes.

"Sorry. I know he's your friend but his dad and I never got along."

"Wasn't he a part of the rebellion too? Gale has always been such a rebel."

"He was but he was stupid about it. He got too drunk at the Hob one night and started yelling about different times coming and revolution and I punched him to shut him up. He woke up the next morning with a black eye and a real dislike for me.  
He wasn't too fond of me when I came home from the Games, anyway. Said I'd changed too much." He scoffed and crossed his arms.

"I'd like to see anyone go into the arena and come out unchanged."

"Did he and Dad get along?"

"Ash got along with everyone, really. Even the peacekeepers liked him. He could make people laugh in uncertain times. His songs soothed people. His kindness moved people. Your dad was the best man I've ever known." Katniss was surprised to see  
Haymitch looking so… devastated. She could tell from the way he spoke that her father had meant a lot to him. But it was so strange to imagine her father being best friends with a Victor.

"What about Bran Mellark?" Haymitch frowned.

"What about him?"

"Was my Dad friends with him?"

"Seam and Merchant didn't mix much sweetheart. Even more so then, than it is now. Still, Bran and Ash respected each other. Bran traded with Ash and he was one of the few Merchants who did. Think Bran did that more for your mother but it  
helped keep you and Prim alive too, so Ash was grateful." Katniss crossed her arms and leaned back against her seat.

"So when did Mom leave Bran for Dad?"

"Your mother's engagement was all the rage in the district. The Apothecary's daughter and the Baker's son was a big deal. Both of them were prominent families and they couldn't wait to join the two. But then one day, Ash's sister got real sick and  
he went to the Apothecary. I told him no Merchant would give away medicine but he said he had to try. He came back that night, with the medicine and a lovesick look on his face. He said he was in love with the Apothecary's daughter and he had to marry her. It was insane, and I told him so, but he said she was his soulmate." Haymitch chuckled softly and shook his head.

"Your grandparents kicked Violet out as soon as they found out why she had called off the wedding. Bran's mother visited Violet to give her one more chance. She promised Violet the Merchant community would exile her if she chose to be with Ash.  
Violet moved in with Ash and they were married a month later. Bran even made their toasting cake."

"That wasn't really fair to Bran, though. He really loved Mom, didn't he?"

"I think your Mom loved him too. But she loved Ash more. We don't always do what everyone expects us to do. And you're your mother's daughter in that respect." Katniss scowled.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"How many people expected you to marry Hawthorne," Haymitch jerked his head toward Gale. "You married a Peacekeeper instead. A Merchant Peacekeeper. You and your mother are a lot alike, defying the norm."

"Lots of Seam girls married Peacekeepers, remember? For wealth and stability."

"Oh cut the shit, sweetheart. Who are you trying to convince? Why is it so hard to say aloud that you love him?" Katniss stared out the window. The trees reminded her of her father and she blinked back tears.

"It was the last thing I said to Daddy that morning," she whispered. "Before he left for work. I told him I loved him. I haven't been able to say it aloud to anyone since then. Not Mom or Prim. And not him. I wanted to tell him but I couldn't lose him  
like Mom lost Dad."

"Yeah? And how's that working out for ya?" She threw him a disgusted look.

"You're such an asshole."

"I'm just saying, it doesn't make the pain any less, does it? Not admitting it aloud doesn't make the separation any easier. Love is in your heart, Katniss. You love that boy, and maybe if you had told him, he would have an easier time of coming back  
to you." Her jaw dropped.

"You're blaming me?!"

"Christ no, sweetheart. I'm just trying to get you to see that hiding your feelings doesn't do anyone any good. I know he's still in there. Boggs said the sound of your voice woke him up for a minute. Just promise me you'll stop lying to yourself. And tell him when you do see him again. It'll help both of you." Katniss fell silent and stared out the window.

"Haymitch… finish your story from yesterday."

"What story," he mumbled, his eyes closed.

"Who killed my dad?" His eyes shot open and he glanced back to see if anyone was listening.

"Keep it down, sweetheart. The Capitol had your father killed. You know that."

"Fine, who was responsible for his death? Who told the Capitol he was involved in the rebellion?" He shook his head and huffed.

"You gotta understand something, Katniss-" but what she needed to understand remained a mystery because Haymitch suddenly stood and marched toward the pilot and Boggs.

"What is that?"

"Airspace has been invaded, sir. Coming from the West."

"Can you zoom in on that image," Boggs pointed to the dashboard. Katniss stood behind Haymitch, peering around him. The image was of a hovercraft with Capitol insignia.

"It's headed toward 12," Haymitch said quietly.

"Soldier, get us higher into the sky. We need to get back to 13 completely undetected."

"Yes Colonel." Katniss stared at the dashboard, wondering who was aboard that hovercraft.

* * *

Peeta leaned back, clutching his seat for dear life. He wasn't the best flyer, he had discovered, and he felt his stomach roll as the hovercraft descended. It hadn't been the quickest of flights either. District 12 was on the other side of Panem, far away from the Capitol. And the sun was going down, which made his pilot uneasy. The whole trip had a feeling of foreboding.  
He glanced at his soldiers and frowned.

"You know our orders. Capture the Mockingjay and bring her back alive."

"And if she resists, General?" Peeta's jaw tightened.

"Then you leave her to me." The soldiers all sat up straighter, diverting their eyes at Peeta's angry expression. The hovercraft landed and Peeta checked the device in his lap.

"It seems that they are in the center of town."

"How do we know they are still there, sir? This could have been from hours ago."

"It likely was. But chances are they are still in the area. No other aircrafts could be detected so that probably haven't left ground. Move out." The soldiers obeyed their General's orders and marched out of the hovercraft. Peeta followed, moving off to the side and he pressed a button on the device. The Minister had sent him footage of the Mockingjay, moving through the debris of a burned building. He turned the volume dial and held it to his ear. Her sweet voice flowed out from the speaker and  
he swallowed. The song wasn't particularly a pleasant one. Something about wearing a necklace of hope with her in the hanging tree but he ignored the lyrics and focused on the voice itself. He stared at the image of the girl, trying to find her in his memories.

"General," one of the soldiers yelled and he lowered the device to his side. He saw the peacekeepers standing in front of a demolished building, a whipping post standing tall in front of it.

"This was their Justice Building, General," the soldier said, waving his hand toward it. On the charred bricks he could see a circle with a bird and an arrow.

A Mockingjay.

"They were here," he said, moving to stand in front of the whipping post. "The paint is fresh. Split up and search." His eyes moved from the graffitti to the whipping post. He felt a sudden pain all over his back, as if he had been struck by lightning.

Or a whip, he stared at the post, his mind racing.

 _"Stop! Stop, that's more than 20! Stop it! You're killing him!"_

"General Mellark." His head shot up and he clutched his rifle as he marched over to where the peacekeepers were.

"This was the footage Minister Antonius sent us, wasn't it sir? The Mockingjay was here." Peeta stared at the tree stump, feeling a knot in his throat.

"General?"

"Yes. This was the footage I received. Spread out and search. She's likely being guarded by the District 13 Colonel we encountered in the Capitol. Remember, Minister Antonius wants her alive." The soldiers marched past him, their rifles in the air. Peeta moved closer to the remains of the building he had seen her in. An oven stood alone and Peeta ran his hand over it.

"A bakery," he said to himself. He shook his head, his hair falling into his eyes. How did he know that? It could be anything. It could have been a house, for all he knew.

He glanced back at the tree stump and his brow furrowed even further.

No. It was definitely a bakery.  
And an apple tree had stood here.  
And a girl had sat under it, drenched to the bone and close to death.  
He could see her in his mind's eye. Shivering and shaking from hunger.  
He had to help her.  
He had. He had burned bread for her.  
He felt his mother's sharp slap on his skin.  
It was the first time he had thought about his mother. He could see her now too. Tall and slender with long blonde hair that was wrapped in a tight bun.  
He had once brushed it out, when he was very young. He remembered how soft it was in his hands.  
Opposite of her hard palms, that left marks on his fair skin.

He held up the device again and pressed play.

"Peeta once told me that the Capitol was fragile. At the time, I didn't know what he meant. It was hard to see clearly because I was so afraid. Now I'm not. The Capitol's fragile because it depends on the districts for everything. Food, energy, even the Peacekeepers that police us. If we declare our freedom, the Capitol collapses. Caius Snow, thanks to you, I'm officially declaring mine today." She sat beside the tree stump he stood next to now, speaking fiercely into the camera. Her silver eyes flashed with rage as she declared her freedom. He could understand why the Capitol feared her.

He looked around the deserted district and back to the device.

"Damn," he shut it off and went off to find his soldiers.

"Return to the hovercraft. The Mockingjay isn't here."

"How do you know, sir?" He pointed up to the sky.

"The footage I received was early morning. The sun was at a different angle. They're long gone now, probably hours ago. We'll return to the Capitol and regroup." The peacekeepers filed onto the hovercraft and Peeta instructed the pilot to return home.

He knew the Minister would be furious. But he wouldn't call the trip a complete failure.

He had more questions for Lavinia now and he had an idea of how to finally get the truth out of her.

* * *

"You sent him where?!" The President's eyes flashed and the Minister cowered in his seat.

"President Snow-"

"Don't. Speak," Caius said through gritted teeth. "Don't make a sound. I'm trying to understand why you thought it was a good idea to send him there, where all of his memories could return. What do you propose we do if he remembers and they  
join together? How exactly do you think we can win this war if the Mockingjay has him with her? We need to bring her down. Reuniting with her husband will have the OPPOSITE effect that we want!" Antonius remained silent, his eyes on the gun on  
the President's desk.

"Get him back here."

"Sir-"

"Get him back here and order him to destroy the refugee camps. We need as much blood on his hands as possible."

"If I may sir...perhaps we just need the right blood on his hands?" Snow pressed his palms to the desk.

"Speak quickly, Antonius. Your next words may save you or may damn you."


	61. Chapter 61

Katniss was doing her best not to fall asleep in her bowl of broth. The ride back to 13 had been tense, as they were afraid of being discovered, until Boggs had assured them that the Capitol hovercraft was too far out to even notice their retreating aircraft. Boggs predicted the Capitolites had probably landed several hours after their departure. Katniss couldn't help but wonder if Peeta had been on it. Boggs had said their intel detected that the Minister of Defense had given orders to bring in the Mockingjay alive. Katniss was fairly certain she already knew who those orders had given to.

"Katniss, please eat something," Prim whined, lifting her head off Rory's shoulder.

"Not hungry," she said through a yawn.

"You haven't eaten anything all day," her sister continued. Katniss shot Rory a look, and he merely shrugged.

"Dating your sister changes things, Katniss."

"What, like it's ok to be a snitch now?"

"Nobody's snitching on you. We all care about you and we're worried. Just eat some bread."

"Yeah cause that's packed with nutrients," Gale scoffed at the end of the table.

"It's sustenance, at least," Prim shot back.

"What I wouldn't give for some fish right now," Finnick sighed, spooning up his broth.

"The only fish I've tasted came out of the lake," Prim said thoughtfully. "Does it taste different if it's from the ocean?"

"Oooh Prim, you and Rory have to come visit us in 4 when this is all over," Annie said cheerfully. "The best seafood you'll ever taste!"

"Oysters and clams and swordfish and tuna and calamari and seabass," Finnick rattled off, looking dreamy. "I miss being near the ocean."

"I've never even seen the ocean," Prim said wistfully. Finnick playfully tugged on the girl's braid.

"Annie and I live right on the beach. You can go swimming every day."

"I don't even know how to swim!"

"We can teach you. Annie was a mermaid in another life."

"They call Finnick the god of the sea," Annie scoffed, shaking her head. "What about you, Katniss? Can you swim?"

"I've swam in the lake in the woods. My father used to take me."

"He never took me," Prim pouted.

"It was too dangerous, Prim."

"Katniss never took me into the woods after our dad died. She was really brave, going under the fence every week."

"The alternative was starving to death," Katniss shrugged off the compliment. "I told Dad I'd always protect you. That includes keeping you fed."

"I've heard about your lush forests in 12. I've never really seen anything like it. On my Victory Tour, I wasn't allowed to venture out of town. I told Johanna I wanted to see the lumber yards but my escort refused to let me leave the Justice Building." Katniss was quiet, not being able to imagine not having trees around. She remembered Peeta showing her around the Capitol and the fake grass they had in the center of town. She shook her head.

"Maybe we'll all take a big trip around Panem after the war ends," she said softly. The group remained quiet, most likely thinking about what that would be like. To be free to travel around the district as they chose. To decide for themselves where they would settle down. Katniss had never allowed herself to think about living somewhere other than 12, until Peeta had started to talk about it.

She imagined he would like 4, with the ocean. Or 7, with all of the trees. She just knew returning to 12 wasn't an option. It was now nothing more than a graveyard.

Maybe he could build a bakery, wherever they settled. He would never have to be a Peacekeeper again. Would they even have Peacekeepers after they won the war?

After. Not If. She wouldn't allow herself to think otherwise.

Because the alternative meant she would lose Peeta forever. If she hadn't already.

* * *

The hallway was silent as she made her way to her compartment. Everyone was still at dinner but she managed to shake off Prim by telling her she just needed sleep. She flung her coveralls to the side and pulled on a night shirt, one of Peeta's she had found in his bag. Sighing, she fell onto the bed and reached over to the bedside table, pulling something to her chest. It was one of his sketchbooks. She hadn't opened it so she had no idea what was inside or how old it was, but holding something he'd loved made her feel close to him. She'd already felt guilty for going through his things but the shirt smelled like him so she didn't feel too bad.

She ran her hand over the bound leather and swallowed. She knew she shouldn't but she flipped the book open and held it up to the lamp.

Pages upon pages of smoothe hands, grey eyes, and katniss flowers. There was a drawing of a meadow full of yellow dandelions. The bakery, with fancy cakes and delicious looking pastries. She could practically smell the fresh-baked bread. Near the back, she found several of a child cowering in the corner, with a dark shape rising overhead. The child had his head lowered and covered by his hands, but she could see bruises on his tiny arms. Her hand shook with anger as she flipped the page. Her eyes widened at the next one.

It was done with such incredible detail that she didn't immediately feel a blush coming on. It was her, with her braid draped over her bare shoulder, a blanket clutched to her chest. She was naked under that blanket, her legs slender and bare, the top of her left breast exposed. It was drawn like the artist had happened upon her while she was dressing, as she looked surprised but calm. Indeed, the look in her eyes and the way she was biting her lip in the drawing made her wonder if Peeta had always seen her as a seductive creature. She ran her hand over the drawing, something Peeta had poured passion and time into, these lines made by his own hand. She wanted to stare at the drawing all night, but she wanted to know if there were more.

The next made her inhale sharply, a stab of longing in her heart. Peeta had drawn them together perfectly- was he some sort of fortune teller?

No, she smiled. He'd just wanted this for so long. Wanted her for so long.

She knew him to have more muscles than this drawing, remembering the way his strong arms held him up so he could thrust into her. His chest was much more built in reality, his abdominal muscles clenching when she ran her tongue across the edge of his underwear. Even his jawline was more defined now, and she closed her eyes, her mind replaying how he had watched her the entire time he trailed his tongue down her chest and between her thighs.

She released a little moan and squeezed her legs shut. She studied the way his head was thrown back, recognizing the look of ecstasy that decorated his face. The way she clutched his forearms signaled he had succeeded in making her come undone. Of course he would draw out her pleasure before he had his own. That was how he was in real life too.

She slammed the book shut and sniffled, setting it beside the lamp. She felt uncomfortably tingly below but she knew Prim would be along shortly. Besides, she only wanted his fingers on her. She knew not even her own could satisfy her now that they'd known pleasure from him.

* * *

"I'll talk to Minister Antonius tonight and we will develop a plan of what to do next," Peeta told his troops as he jumped out of the truck. "Go home and rest, soldiers."

"Good night, General." Peeta hoisted his bag over his shoulder and entered his house.

He knew immediately that something was wrong. The air was tense and he reached for his gun, the bag sliding off his arm.

"Lavinia?" There was no answer and he grew even more anxious. He approached the closed bedroom door and leaned in to listen. Hearing nothing, he tapped the door with his gun, then pushed it open.

His eyes widened and he pointed his gun at the man who held his wife's arms behind her back. A sound of surprise and disbelief came from the back of his throat as the Minister of Defense came into view. Behind him, President Snow sat on the bed. Lavinia was on her knees, while the Minister clutched her chin roughly.

"What's the meaning of this," he said, his voice much too warbly for his own liking.

"Your wife is a traitor, General Mellark," Snow said lazily. She whimpered in the Minister's clutches but Antonius clapped a hand over her mouth.

"What are you talking about? Lavinia is as much of a Loyalist as I am."

"I'm saddened to say you're wrong. We thought so too. Until we found out she was passing information on to the Rebel army. She warned them that you were coming for the Mockingjay. That's how they were able to get away before you arrived." Peeta's eyes searched Lavinia's. He'd never noticed how stormy grey they were. He hadn't seen eyes like that in the Capitol. She blinked back tears and shook her head.

"That's not true," she said against Antonius's palm.

"Silence, girl," Antonius yanked her hair back and she whimpered in pain.

"Minister, that's my wife. I'll thank you not to manhandle her like that. Not to mention, she is pregnant. Can we just calmly talk this out?"

"She has been passing information to the rebels for weeks now, General," Snow said heavily. "We had recording devices installed in your bedroom when we first started to suspect that we had a traitor in our midst."

"You bugged my house?" Peeta sounded appalled.

"We took necessary measures for many Peacekeepers. We suspected there was a traitor in the higher ranks. After you left for your mission in 12, we were alerted that she contacted District 13 and told them you were on your way to 12. This is the utmost betrayal."

"She has to be punished, General Mellark. You are a man of the law. You must understand."

"She's pregnant, President Snow. Surely you can't be thinking of arresting her. My child won't be born in a prison."

"We won't punish the child. But you know how we punish traitors in the Capitol." Antonius threw Lavinia to the ground and she remained curled into herself, sobbing into the floor. Peeta watched the two men with narrowed eyes and when Antonius produced a sharp blade, he took a step back.

"No."

"General Mellark, as President of Panem, I order you to punish the prisoner." He took another step back, shaking his head.

"You can't… you can't ask me…"

"She is a traitor to Panem, Mellark," Antonius growled. "To you. She is helping the Mockingjay."

"Peeta," she sobbed from the floor. Peeta's eyes darted to her trembling form. "Peeta, remember! You have to remember!"

"Get him out of here," Snow growled in Antonius's ear.

"General Mellark. You're under arrest for insubordination."

"Don't touch me! Don't touch her!"

"I need back up," Antonius yelled into his communicator.

"Mellark, don't do anything stupid," Snow hissed. Peeta's eyes flashed and he ducked under Antonius's outstretched arm.

"Get out of here, Lavinia! Go!" He yanked her to her feet and pushed her toward the door.

"Peeta, you love Katniss! Please remember!" Peeta let out a cry out outrage as Antonius back handed his wife, sending her to the floor. Peeta punched the Minister hard and ran to Lavinia. He knelt beside her, cradling her head. Her eyes were hazy, unfocused.

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you when you asked," she whispered. "You're Peeta Mellark. Your home is District 12. You're in love with Katniss-" Peeta heard yells from the outside and Snow ran to the door. Peeta slammed it shut and stood in front of it, his gun pointed at the president.

"She's telling the truth, isn't she? You hijacked me again."

"And it sounds like it's time for another dose of poison," the Minister snarled from the floor. "You're so much more obedient when you've got poison boiling your blood." Peeta looked back at Lavinia and bit his lip.

"The baby? It's not mine, is it?"

"No. My husband was killed. By them." Peeta's usually kind eyes blackened with hatred.

"You sons of bitches." There was pounding on the door behind him.

"General Mellark, open the door!"

"Mellark, don't be stupid," Snow barked. "You were much happier when you were oblivious. You lived a life of wealth. You were happily married."

"To a woman who is a stranger and in a life that's not mine," Peeta spat. "I'm done playing your game." Antonius swiped his blade across the back of Peeta's leg, making him drop the floor with a cry of pain. The Minister pulled something from his pocket and he stabbed a needle into Peeta's neck. Peeta grunted and fell on his side.

"No," Lavinia wailed, rushing to him. The door burst open and the soldiers eyed the General and his wife anxiously.

"Arrest the General's wife and deliver him to the Laboratory," Snow ordered, yanking his suit in place.

"No! NO," Lavinia writhed and spit when they pulled her to her feet. Peeta started to writhe where he lay and one of the soldiers knelt to help him.

"Soldiers, do as I say." Two of them dragged Lavinia out of the room while the others tended to Peeta. When they were gone, Snow slammed the door shut and turned on the Minister.

"President Snow, sir-"

"Shut up. I should never have listened to you. I told you he would never punish her himself. I ordered you to do it yourself and you were too much a coward. You wanted to make someone else do it. What's the matter, Antonius? After all this time, afraid of a little blood?"

"If Peeta made her an Avox, there's no way Katniss would ever take him back after that. Don't you see, sir? We just-"

"You are a fucking moron, Antonius. If he came back to find her an Avox, he wouldn't be questioning everything again. She wouldn't have been able to remind him of her. Why do I listen to you? Why don't I just get rid of you?"

"Sir," Antonius yelped. "You need me. I helped you kill—"

"You've helped me kill a lot of people, Antonius. That doesn't necessarily mean I need you. What was in that needle?" Antonius fell silent and Snow's eyes flashed.

"WHAT was in that needle?"

"Tracker-jacker venom, sir. He remembers too much now! We have to act quickly, to make sure he doesn't revert to his old self."

"Take care of the girl, Antonius. Then meet me at the laboratory." Antonius held his breath while Snow opened the door and stomped out of the house. He questioned Snow's suddenly calm demeanor but he followed the soldiers who had taken the girl.

He would rather kill her and be done with it. It's what they had done with her husband, though that had actually been an accident. He'd been too weak to handle the poison in large amounts, like Mellark had. His heart had given out, to Antonius's disappointment. He wanted more Peacekeepers from other districts. He needed more people Mellark knew, to help keep him in line.

Speaking of Mellark, he wondered if they would have to start all over now. Would Mellark remember, or would it be a fuzzy memory at the back of his mind? If it were up to him, they would have killed Mellark ages ago. They had kept him alive for years, for what? All because of one stupid promise Corialianus Snow had made to a peasant… well Corialianus Snow was dead. Caius Snow had killed his own father, so Antonius couldn't understand why he was still worried about his father's promises.

He rapped on the door where they were keeping the girl and a soldier bowed low as he entered. The girl watched him, a horrified look in her dark eyes.

"I did warn you, Mrs. Murphy. I warned you to toe the line and keep to the story."

"I didn't contact the rebels," she cried. "You made that up! I didn't tell them anything!"

"But you tried to remind him of who he was."

"No-"

"You told him he hadn't always been like this. That the Snows twisted him. We weren't lying about bugging the house. You should have just played the part of a devoted wife."

"Please," tears streamed down her cheeks as she clutched her pregnant belly. "Please don't hurt my baby."

"Oh it's Mellark's baby. And we will make sure to remind him of that when he wakes up." She frowned, looking baffled.

"We can't kill you, Mrs. Murphy. We still need you. You may have set us back slightly but we still have him under our control. Especially with more venom." She shook her head, looking sick.

"You, however, we can make sure you will never be able to remind him of his real name again," Antonius took the knife from his pocket, twirling it between his fingers. She screamed in terror when he bore down on her.

* * *

Katniss felt a smile tugging at her lips as Finnick leaned in to kiss his bride. She joined in as the rest of the room clapped and cheered for the couple. Finnick led Annie out to the middle of the floor and the musicians from 12 started up a lively tune.

"Ugh, weddings," Johanna said as she sank into a chair next to Katniss. "Gag me."

"Clearly you've never had one," Katniss said nastily, not removing her eyes from the couple. To her surprise, Johanna chuckled.

"You're right about that. Love is weird." Katniss was wondering why the Victor had come to sit next to her, when Johanna spoke again.

"That last propo you filmed was… interesting." Katniss frowned but didn't say anything.

"I never met your dad but I heard a lot about him. It sounded like he was a good man." Surprised, Katniss glanced sideways.

"He was."

"Haymitch showed us some of the videos of him and you. You used to be pretty cute." Katniss rolled her eyes and shook her head.

"I didn't understand until I watched those videos. He did have a voice that could inspire. You inherited it from him. I think you can do some good things for this country, Katniss." Katniss swallowed anxiously.

"Th-thank you." Johanna nodded and leaned back in her seat.

"Strange though, not to see your sister on any of those videos."

"Prim was too young and Mom didn't want her in any of them. She didn't want me in them either but I guess Dad got away with having me with him. It's what Haymitch said anyway."

"You don't think there was any other reason?" Katniss scowled.

"What are you talking about?"

"I mean the fact that your sister looks nothing like you or your father. Wasn't segregation a huge thing in 12 back then? Your blonde sister looks like your mom and you inherited your dad's dark looks. It just strikes me as interesting that he never used her for the propos."

"What are you getting at, Johanna?"

"Cut back on the defensiveness a bit. I'm merely pointing out an observation." Katniss went silent and watched Annie and Finnick dance.

"I like Annie's dress. You let her borrow it?"

"Yeah."

"Nice of you. I know she didn't want to get married in these god-awful coveralls." She plucked at her clothing to demonstrate her disgust.

"I'm glad Finnick could have this," she lowered her voice. "He deserves some happiness after all of the shit he has been through." Katniss couldn't say anything. She hadn't known the Victors for very long but she knew of the lifestyle they had been forced into. She, too, was happy for him.

"Hopefully he and Annie will have some peace now."

"Not for long," Johanna scoffed. "If Coin gets her way, Finnick will be celebrating his honeymoon in the Capitol." Katniss turned toward her, her brow furrowed.

"What?"

"You didn't know? Coin wants Boggs to put together a mission to the Capitol. What is they are calling it? The Star-Squad, I think. Basically just wants to put the attractive people on TV and show Panem that the Victors are supporting the rebellion."

"You can't make a propo video doing that here?" Johanna shook her head.

"Coin thinks it's best for the country to see you in action. Apparently we can't leave the Mockingjay's side. If a bullet is aimed at you, I'll be sure to jump right in front of it, Mrs. Mockingjay! It's everybody's job to keep you alive, afterall."

"Is that why you hate me?"

"Partly," the Victor admitted. "Jealousy is certainly involved. I also think you're a little hard to swallow. With your tacky romantic drama and your defender-of-the-helpless act. Only it isn't an act, which makes you more unbearable. Please feel free to take this personally."

"You should have been the Mockingjay. No one would've had to feed you lines," Katniss shifted in her seat.

"True. But no one likes me," Johanna looked back at the couple, who were now pulling others out onto the dance floor.

"Here, maybe. In the Capitol, you're the one they're scared of now." Katniss snorted. No one was afraid of her. And they certainly weren't afraid of using her own husband against her. If they thought for a second that his memories would return, they wouldn't be using him in such a way. She knew that.

She knew that he was most likely lost to her. For good. She was tired of going and forth, hoping and then losing hope. She was just tired.

"This handsome stud isn't afraid of me though," Johanna jumped up from her seat and ran her fingers up and down Gale's arm. "Are you, gorgeous?" She chuckled to herself as she slinked away into the crowd. Gale watched her go and shook his head as he turned back to Katniss.

"Terrified," he said with a serious face. Katniss laughed and Gale took Johanna's empty seat.

"Not joining in the dancing?"

"Not much of a dancer," Katniss shrugged.

"I don't think that's true. Rory and Posy said you were quite the dancer at Madge's wedding. And your own, for that matter."

"I had a dance partner at both of those events." Gale sighed.

"Well I know I'm not your husband, nor will I ever measure up to him, but I could be your partner for one dance." Katniss glanced at his outstretched hand.

"Gale-"

"Just dance with me, Catnip." Sighing, she took his hand and he lead her over to where Prim, Madge, and Annie were dancing. Gale pushed her toward the girls and Prim threw her arms around her sister. Katniss shot Gale a grateful look as Annie tugged on her hand. Gale laughed and clapped along, while the women started to huddle in the center of the room. Finnick and the other men formed a giant circle around the perimeter of the room, joining hands and circling the women. Annie shrieked and giggled, which made Katniss smile.

* * *

The couples' joy was infectious and the party lasted all night. Katniss and Rory supported a sleeping Prim as they made their way back to the bunkers. Rory pushed the door open and they draped Prim across the bed. Katniss turned and out of the corner of her eye, she watched Rory tuck her sister in and kiss her forehead. She hid a grin as she turned back around.

"Where's your mom?"

"Probably with the other nurses."

"But I saw her with Mr. Mellark at the wedding."

"Really?"

"Yeah, they were talking in the corner of the room. I figured she would be back here already." Katniss glanced at the clock. It was definitely later than she thought.

"I'm not sure then. You should get going yourself. I'm glad Coin bent the rules for lights out tonight."

"I imagine it's been awhile since people have had something happy to celebrate," Rory shrugged. Katniss nodded as she followed him to the door.

"Hey Rory, what's this about a mission to the Capitol?" Rory paused.

"Huh?"

"Johanna mentioned a mission to the Capitol, to see me in action. You don't know anything about it?"

"Colonel Boggs mentioned something a few days ago but he said it wouldn't happen any time soon. More like an end of the war thing. Our rebel forces haven't even been able to rise up against the Peacekeepers yet. This war is far from over." Her shoulders slumped and the sadness in her eyes made Rory reach for her hand.

"That doesn't mean we can't get Peeta back, Katniss. We can keep trying."

"Coin isn't going to waste any more resources on trying to rescue him," she said softly. "I'm afraid he's really gone, Rory. It's been months… he's actually forgotten about me."

"No," he said firmly. "I believe Rye when he says that's impossible. Peeta loves you. Deep down, he knows who you are. He just has to get past the poison and remember. And he will. When he sees you again, he'll remember how much he loves you."

"I wish I could just fly to the Capitol and find him. I'm tired of waiting around. Coin keeps saying we have to wait for him to come here but he's not stupid. He won't come here. He will wait for me to come to the Capitol, because those are his orders. Snow is still controlling him."

"You can't just go off on your own, Katniss. That's what Snow wants. You'd be playing into his hands and if he has the chance, he'll use Peeta to capture you. Just wait for Boggs to come up with a plan. Keep making those propos and hope Peeta is watching them. He'll come home to you soon." He squeezed her hand and closed the door behind him. Katniss rested her forehead against the wall, before hurriedly removing her coveralls and climbing into bed.

"Katty," her sister said tiredly.

"Mmhm?"

"I really love Rory." Katniss lifted her head off the pillow and stared at her sister.

"I think that's really great, Prim."

"You'll be my maid of honor?" Her brow shot up and she watched Prim for a moment before answering.

"Has he asked you to marry him?"

"He will," she said, smacking her lips. "We're going to have a great big cake and I'm going to wear really tall shoes, like the kind Effie Trinkett wears." Katniss snorted and shook her head.

"Ok Prim. Whatever you want. It's your wedding."

"Will Peeta make the cake?" Katniss's heart stung.

"I'm sure he will. What kind do you like?"

"Lemon."

"Ok," she agreed. "A lemon cake for my baby sister. He'll be thrilled.

"He's a good brother," she sighed. Katniss chuckled and lay back down, her braid spread across the pillow.

"Katty?"

"Yes Prim?"

"You're a good sister."

"You are too, Prim."

"I love you, Katty."

"Love you too, Primrose." Her sister's snores came only seconds later and she knew Prim wouldn't remember the conversation in the morning. She smirked, wondering how Rory would feel about what she had said. Had they talked about marriage? They were young but the country was at war. She knew how it was, the desire to be with the person they loved.

She closed her eyes and slipped into uneasy dreams.

* * *

 _"Katkin. Come here, my flower." Katniss looked up from the dandelions she was braiding together and hurried over to climb into her father's lap. He had been singing and she loved to listen, gently swaying from side to side as his sweet melody filled the air._

 _"My sweet little rosebud. What are you making?"_

 _"A dandelion crown," she held up the almost-finished product._

 _"That's lovely. Who is the lucky recipient of said crown?"_

 _"You're the King, daddy," she giggled. "You get to wear it."_

 _"So that makes you Princess Katkin, does it?" Katniss spread her arms._

 _"All hail the Princess Katniss! Bow down to me!" Her father hurriedly flopped onto his stomach and pretended to grovel before his daughter. Katniss shrieked with laughter and fell back into her father's strong arms. There was a rustle in the tall grass and her father stiffened._

 _"Stay down, Katniss." He pushed her behind him and reached for his knife. The grass parted and a small blonde boy tumbled forward._

 _"I'm sorry," he gasped, throwing his arms in front of his face. "I didn't mean to sneak!"_

 _"It's alright, boy," Ash sheathed his blade. "You're the baker's youngest, aren't you? What are you doing out here?"_

 _"I'm sorry," he said again, stammering. "I heard singing and- it was lovely, I just had to come closer. Your voices are… I could listen to you both all day." Ash glanced at his daughter, who peered out from behind him._

 _"My songbird has quite the voice, doesn't she?"_

 _"Yes sir," the boy's blue eyes seemed to sparkle. "Will you sing again?"_

 _"You'll have to ask her," he gestured behind him. The boy swallowed and took a step forward._

 _"Will you sing for me, Katniss? Please?" She glanced up at her father, who smiled down at her._

 _"Ok." She sat down and started to sing sweetly. Her father joined in and the little boy plopped down in front of them. He closed his eyes, convinced he had never heard anything so sweet. When they finished, his eyes shot open and he swallowed._

 _"Thank you. That was lovely." He reached into his basket and withdrew something wrapped in a napkin. "For your song." Katniss reached for it, and gasped at the warmth. She glanced up at her father again, who merely nodded. Katniss tore into the warm pastry, letting out a delighted moan as the cheese oozed into her mouth._

 _"It's so good," she moaned, her mouth full._

 _"Don't be rude, flower," Ash laughed._

 _"Fank you," she said, shooting the boy a smile._

 _"You're welcome. Thank you for the song."_

 _"PEETA!" The boy gasped and jumped to his feet._

 _"I-I have to get home. Thank you… again! Good night!"_

 _"Wait," Katniss stood and fingered the dandelion crown. Looking resolved, she stepped forward and placed it on the boy's golden curls. He gasped and reached up, his hand hovering over his head._

 _"Thank you," she said again. The boy swallowed and looked like he wanted to touch her._

 _"PEETA MELLARK, WHERE ARE YOU?"_

 _"I have to go," he said miserably. "Good night!"_

 _"Good night, Peeta," Ash smiled as the boy ran through the meadow. Katniss stuffed the rest of the treat into her mouth and sucked on her fingers._

 _"I wanna marry a baker one day, Daddy."_

 _"Is that so?"_

 _"He can make me bread and cheesy buns every day!" Ash chuckled as he lifted his daughter into his arms._

 _"By my reckoning, that will happen one day. And he will treat you like a princess. Are you ready to head home, flower?" She nodded and wrapped her arms around his neck as he carried her back home._

* * *

Katniss's eyes shot open and she frowned at the ceiling. She remembered her dream vividly but… was it just that? Or had it actually happened? She couldn't remember speaking to Peeta when she was younger. She certainly had never wanted to get married when she was younger. But it seemed so real…

She tossed the covers off and padded over to the bags in the corner. Peeta's sketchbooks rested on top of the bags and she sat on the floor, her legs crossed. Her mother grunted in her sleep and she glanced back at the bed, where her mother was hanging off the edge while Prim took up most of the bed. Katniss smiled and shook her head as she flipped the book open. She flipped through the pages, her eyes searching. Shaking her head, she reached for another one, then another. She sighed heavily and closed the book. She didn't know what she was expecting, really. She reached for the last one and flipped it open. Her hands clapped over her mouth at the first picture. A little girl standing in front of her father. A little boy holding a basket. The little girl draping a crown of dandelions on his fair curls. The look on the boy's face was one of disbelief and adoration. The girl's father watched with a smile.

Katniss clutched the book to her chest as silent tears streamed down her face.

* * *

Peeta's eyes fluttered open, the dream still lingering in the furthest reaches of his mind. He tried to grasp at it, to remember if it was just a dream or an actual memory. He had a feeling he knew the little girl, but from where, he wasn't sure. The girl's father, too, looked familiar. And their voices. He wanted to hear more. But the dream was leaving as he found himself waking up. He sat up and groaned, running his hand through his hair. He glanced around the room, baffled.

"Where am I now?" It looked like a hospital. There were trays of medical tools nearby and he was attached to some sort of machine. He fingered the arm strap and glanced up at the machine. For all he knew, it could be pumping poison into his bloodstream.

"It's monitoring my heart," he scoffed at himself. He pushed the blankets off and inspected the bandage around his leg.

"What the hell happened," he wondered aloud. His face screwed up, trying to chase the memories. He remembered coming home and talking to Lavinia… and that was it. What else had happened? Why was he here?

The door burst open and his eyes widened.

"General Mellark, something terrible has happened!"


	62. Chapter 62

The two soldiers looked anxious and seemed reluctant to continue.

"Speak freely, Soldier," Peeta said firmly.

"It's your wife, sir." Peeta sat up straighter.

"Lavinia? What's happened? Is the baby alright?"

"The rebels attacked, sir… you've been in the hospital for 2 days. Minister Antonius just discovered her. We've been given orders to bring you to them."

"Get this thing off me, then!" The soldiers ran to get the doctor, who nervously removed the cuff and the IV from Peeta's arm. He flung the blanket off and stepped gingerly onto the floor.

"Be careful, General Mellark. Your leg still needs to heal."

"Damn rebels," he winced as he put pressure on his injured leg. "Soldier, hand me those crutches." The Peacekeeper brought the crutches to him and he stood up.  
"Take me to my wife."

* * *

The doctor chased them down the hall, crying out for Peeta to be careful and not to put too much strain on the injury and to remember to take medications. Peeta ignored him, his mind on his wife and what had happened. He couldn't remember a rebel attack. In fact…

No, he shook his head. It was a ridiculous thought. You must be mistaken.

* * *

The Peacekeepers drove him to the President's mansion and stood at attention as Peeta hurried inside. The President's wife was the one to welcome him.  
"General Mellark, I'm so glad you're alright."

"Is Lavinia here?"

"Right this way, General." She lead him into the sitting room, which was full of people. A doctor leaned over Lavinia, listening to her heart. The President stood with several peacekeepers, all watching anxiously. The Minister was nowhere to be seen.

"What's happened," Peeta asked softly.

"General Mellark," Snow rushed toward him. "Thank god you're alright. I thought the rebels had killed you this time for sure."

"Lavinia?"

"She's alive," the doctor said gingerly. "But she'll never speak again. I've given her some sedatives, so she will be out for awhile." Peeta noticed Lavinia's jaw was discolored and she kept clenching her teeth in her sleep.

"I don't understand."

"They cut her tongue out, Mellark," Snow said heavily. "And they left her for dead. Minister Antonius discovered her on the outskirts of the city. He brought her here and I called for the doctor immediately. Thankfully, no harm has come to the baby." Peeta felt his stomach churn.

"I don't even remember them coming here."

"You fought bravely. But they managed to subdue you and you were injured in the process. Don't blame yourself, General." Peeta swallowed and knelt next to Lavinia.

"Thank you, Doctor. We will see that Lavinia has the proper care and is escorted to her home safely." The doctor nodded and stood. He bowed to the President and to his wife before exiting the house.

"General Mellark," Snow spoke, making Peeta wince. "What do you remember of the attack?"

"Nothing," he said miserably. "I came home to speak to Lavinia. I don't remember anything after that." Behind him, the President shot a pleased look toward his wife. Cassandra's response was to roll her eyes.

"Very well. Soldiers Cato and Felix will escort you and your wife home. You need to rest, General. I'm sure you are in pain." Peeta grimaced as he stood up but he refused help. He allowed the Peacekeepers to lift his wife and he lead the way to the door. He paused and bowed his head to the President.

"Once again, your kindness has saved us. I thank you for your generosity, Mr. President."

"No thanks needed, General." Peeta limped to the car, the soldiers following him. Snow closed the door and smirked.

"Once again, he doesn't remember a thing."

"And that once again lets Antonius off the hook? He's an idiot, Caius. Kill him already."

"He may yet be useful."

"You keep saying that and he keeps messing up! You really think the girl won't find a way to tell Mellark what happened?"

"She's from the worst parts of District 12," he shrugged. "She's likely illiterate. Most of them are."

"Caius, this is ridiculous. Why are you keeping him alive? How many times have you hijacked him? Just kill him and be done with him and Antonius already. Why do you persist in making things difficult for us?"

"Oh so difficult for you, Cassandra. Lying has always come far too easily for you."

"We grew up in the Capitol. We both come from powerful families. You know as well as I that lying is the only way to survive." Caius ran his fingers through his hair and made his way up the stairs.

"Your father is dead, Caius. Forget about promises or curses or whatever he's still holding over you. Just kill the Peacekeeper."

Aurelia Snow peered around the corner and strained to hear her father's reply. She chewed her lip and stared at the spot where the poor girl from 12 lay on the couch. She'd heard Minister Antonius bring the girl in earlier that morning. The garbled screams had brought her running and she stayed out of sight while her father and the Minister exchanged heated words. The girl writhed on the couch, unable to speak. Aurelia had understood immediately. She was now an Avox. She'd grown up with Avox servants, she'd become close with several of them. Now the General's wife had been punished.

She checked to make sure her parents were still upstairs before hurrying outside and around the house. There was a small door, hardly noticeable, but it seemed to be Aurelia's destination. She rapped on the door three times with her knuckles and leaned in close.

"Mockingjay," she whispered against the wood. The door swung open and she slipped inside.

* * *

Peeta watched his wife sleep fitfully. The drugs the doctor had given her didn't keep away the nightmares. She tossed and turned and fought with the blankets. He wanted to reach out to her but he didn't know how to calm her. What was she seeing? Her attacker coming after her with a sharp blade? He winced and lowered his face to his hands.

His leg ached but he didn't move to take any more medication or put any salve on it. His racing mind almost distracted him from the pain.

"I came home from District 12. I went to talk to Lavinia. Someone else was there." His handsome face twisted in frustration as he tried to sort through his memories. Why couldn't he remember? The last time, Snow had told him the rebels had knocked him out. He'd remembered a fight. He bore the marks of a fight. His back was still covered in scars. He couldn't remember the exact details but he knew someone had tried to kill him.

Something bothered him though. Avoxes were only known in the Capitol. It was the term given to someone who was considered a traitor in the Capitol. He remembered from his Peacekeeper training, Avoxes could be hunted in all districts. If they were rebels, the Peacekeepers brought them to the Capitol to become domestic servants. It's what Snow wanted to do to the Mockingjay. To cut out her tongue, to end her song of revolution. Peeta glanced at his wife. Why would the rebels turn her into an Avox? And would they even know how to do such a thing?

A memory stirred, like it was trying to push itself to the front of his brain. A man with red hair and a kind smile. Peeta frowned. Who was he and why was his face in Peeta's mind?

Lavinia's hand rested on the blanket and Peeta tenderly picked it up. He ignored the giant wedding ring and his fingers interlaced with hers. It was the first time he had touched her. He noted, with surprise, her hands were not as smooth as he expected. In fact, her palms were roughened and her right hand looked as if had been broken once or twice. No woman in the Capitol had such weathered hands. Many of them didn't work for a living. His fingers lightly traced over her calluses and he cocked his head. Strange.

"I'm done playing your game," he heard his own voice in his head. He dropped Lavinia's hand and gripped his hair with both hands. Maybe when Lavinia woke up, she could help him piece it all together.

* * *

Peeta heard the door open and he lowered his book. Lavinia peered out of the bedroom and took a hesitant step forward. He set the book on the table and stood.

"How are you feeling?" He immediately regretted it, knowing she couldn't answer. She nodded and leaned against the wall. How lost and frightened she seemed, he noted. Her eyes darted around the room, seemingly searching for something. His eyes widened as he remembered himself yelling at someone, "you bugged my house". He winced and rubbed his temples. When he opened his eyes, he leaped back, seeing Lavinia right beside him. She tugged on his hand and his brow furrowed.

"You want to go somewhere?" She put her finger to her lips, pointed at the ceiling, then rubbed her stomach. Peeta's head was starting to hurt.

"You… let's go get some food, I'm sure the baby is starving!" Her relieved smile told him it was the correct response. He offered her his arm but it was more of her supporting him as they exited the house.

"Do you want to go get something from City Circle?" She shook her head.

"Do you want to get something and take it out of the city?" Her eyes were pleading so he supposed that meant yes. This would take some getting used to, he decided.

* * *

Munching on sandwiches from a local bakery, Peeta leaned back against the sculpture and chewed thoughtfully. His injured leg was stretched out in front of him, while he pressed his palm to the fake grass beneath him. He had brought her to a park just outside the city, where a few couples were lounging on picnic blankets and sipping champagne. Peeta frowned. It seemed ridiculous to him. So much frivolity, even for a simple picnic. Back home-

He started to choke on his sandwich and Lavinia looked alarmed. She tentatively reached out to him, looking uncertain.

"Lavinia," he gasped. "The Capitol isn't our home, is it?" She swallowed and shook her head.

"Something happened… I mean, recently. Something happened at our house. We were attacked?" A nod.

"By rebels?" A vigorous shake of the head. Peeta stared at his sandwich.

"The Minister?" Lavinia's eyes widened and she clutched his hands, nodding.

"I… I thought so. I remember… but...the Minister attacked us? But why? Wait… he was the one who did… this to you?" She gingerly rubbed her cheek and nodded.

"Lavinia… I need answers. And I know you can't tell me but… I know something is wrong here. It's fuzzy but it's there. Pieces of memories, just floating around in my head. I need your help to make sense of it all. Please help me." Lavinia looked to the side, her face almost wistful. Peeta watched her as she rubbed her belly, closing her eyes and blinking back tears.

"Can you… um, can you write?" She bit her lip and held up her fingers, to indicate a little bit. Peeta's eyes widened as he realized his suspicions were correct. Everyone in the Capitol was educated. Her hands were roughened by work. His wife was clearly not from the Capitol.

Which meant, neither was he. He cleared his throat and shook his head.

"Ok, no, that's fine. Um, we can… I'll just ask questions. Ok? And you… you answer them." She raised her brow and he cleared his throat again.

"Ok, I remember going to District 12. To look for someone. The Mockingjay?" A nod.  
"Alright, so when I came home from the mission, I found the Minister waiting to punish you. And I hit him. He stuck a needle… wait a minute… " his eyes became wider and Lavinia leaned back.

"He's hijacking me again," he said more to himself. "When I was first made a Peacekeeper, they told me I had to forget everything about my former life. They wanted me to become a ruthless killer, like them. But I refused. So they poisoned me. Beat me and starved me. Made me… a piece in their twisted game of what's right and wrong. Hijacking... someone told me." His breathing became rather labored and his eyes were wide. Lavinia watched him anxiously.  
"They made me forget… everything. Or almost everything. And then… then…" Lavinia was actually leaning forward, as if hanging onto his every word, and jumped when he hollered in frustration.

"Damn it! I don't remember. What came after that… I don't remember! Why can't I remember?" Lavinia rubbed his arm and his eyes met hers, both holding back tears of frustration and misery.

"I feel like this is the most we have ever talked," he said softly. She gave a weak smile and nodded.

"This is fake, isn't it? You, me, the baby. None of it is real." She rubbed her belly but of course didn't say anything. He pulled his knees to his chest.

"It's all so messed up," he muttered. Lavinia touched his hand and cocked her head in question.

"I mean, everything in my mind… has this shiny quality. All of my memories are so intense or just… aren't stable. I know I sound like I've gone mad," he added in response to her alarmed expression. "I don't know how to explain it. I just know that… they have been messing with my mind for a long time. And I can't tell what's real and what's not real. Whenever I think that I am starting to figure things out, my memories get all jumbled again. It's so confusing." Lavinia moved closer and tapped the side of his head. His brow quirked in confusion.

"My mind?" A nod. "I was poisoned again?" She tapped his head several times and he closed his eyes.

"Yeah, I know they have done it several times. For some reason, though, each time they do it… it doesn't last. I mean… I still can't remember everything. But you see, the Minister's attack… that's all starting to come back. The President was there too, wasn't he?" She nodded, tapping on his head again.

"Yes. Snow has been doing this to me. For a long time now, right? He really wants me to forget… so help me remember, Lavinia. What does he want me to forget so badly?" She bit her lip then held up his hand. She tapped on his finger, where a wedding band should be. He frowned and looked at hers.

"Our wedding?" She shook her head but tapped on his finger again. She moved her hand down to his chest, right over his heart and he inhaled sharply.

"Our marriage isn't real. The baby… the baby isn't mine. You loved someone else. And they killed him." A single tear dripped down her cheek and he used his thumb to wipe it away.

"Why are they going to these extraordinary lengths? They used you as my pretend wife, they hijacked me, they sent me to 12 to destroy the Mockingjay-" Lavinia grabbed his hand, nodding, and tapped his ring finger again.

"I don't know what you're trying to tell me," his shoulders slumped, his head drooping. Lavinia sighed and dropped his hand. She looked around, searching for something, and then held up her bread. Peeta stared.

"Um… bread?" She nodded and pointed to him, then at the bread.

"Bread and me?" She huffed, clearly running out of patience.

"Ok, let's… let's just enjoy the fresh air." He wanted to know more, wanted answers, but she couldn't provide them. It was ironic, he thought, that he had asked her for them in the past and now that she couldn't give them, she was more than ready to open up.

"We can't let the President and the Minister know I remember what happened," he said quietly. "Who knows what they would do to you? They already did this because they think you told me something. Right? They did that and tried to make me believe you were a traitor. That's real?" She nodded warily. "We should try to leave the Capitol. Except there's no safe place for us right now." Lavinia turned his hand over and used her pointer finger to write in his palm. She did it several times, until he realized they were numbers.

"13?" She nodded frantically. He frowned, staring at his palm.

"Wait… District 13? You want to go to 13?" She nodded, squeezing his hands.

"You're insane. What makes you think they would accept us there? Everyone knows who I am. And the Mockingjay is in 13!" She grasped his face in both hands and nodded, her eyes wide and hard. He pried her hands from his cheeks and frowned.

"Alright, clearly you are somehow involved with the Mockingjay. I can't even remember her name right now. It… starts with a K. Is that right?" Another nod.

"But she's a rebel… she attacked me. She almost killed me." She grabbed his face again and shook her head slowly. His hands covered hers.

"Ok. I'm understanding you. We need to find the Mockingjay, to get answers. But we can't let Snow and Antonius know that we are leaving. Do you have any family that we can say we are visiting?" Her eyes fell and her hand rested on her stomach. He swallowed uncomfortably.

"Ok. We'll leave for 13 as soon as I can arrange passage. They don't know you have no family left. There aren't many soldiers I trust but there are a few who I think will help. I'll take care of it, Lavinia. I promise." He cupped her cheek and smiled. She covered his hand with hers and closed her eyes. Lowering his hand, she used her finger to write in his palm again. He stared, watching her slowly write out one letter at a time.

"R," he said slowly. She nodded, then continued. "O. S. A. L. I." Her nods became more emphatic each time he guessed a letter correctly.

"R. O. S. A. L. I. E. Rosalie?" She grasped his hands and nodded. He shook his head in confusion and she pointed to herself with both hands.

"Rosalie. That's your name? Your real name?" The most emphatic nod of them all. He collapsed against the statue behind him. He stared at his palm for a moment and swallowed.

"What is my name? My real name?" She hesitated, then took his hand in hers. She slowly repeated the process, waiting for him to speak the letter aloud.

"P. E. E. T. A." She closed his hand and brought it to his own heart. He swallowed, feeling his heart race uncontrollably.

"Peeta Mellark. Not Peter." Her eyes were glassy but there was a sense of resolution in them. The storms tossed but she seemed more determined than angry. He remembered asking her for the truth and she had tried to hide it. He couldn't say she deserved what she had gotten because he knew she had just been trying to keep her baby safe.

"Rosalie… you said the Mockingjay isn't an enemy. Right?" She crossed her arms and raised a brow.

"Don't look at me like that, please. I'm trying to sort through these memories and you have no idea how much there is to sort through. Tell me about the Mockingjay." She held his hand up in front of his face, as she had done earlier, and tapped the same finger. His brow furrowed and he opened his mouth to speak but she repeated her earlier action of pressing his hand to his heart. She held firmly to his finger, tapping it for emphasis.

"I loved her," he said in awe. She nodded and stretched her arms wide. He managed a weak smile.

"A lot?" Another nod.

"Then why can't I remember her? Her name, her face, what she smells like? I can't remember any of it. How could I forget someone I loved so much?" She gave him a sympathetic smile and tapped his temple again.

"Fine, I get it, they poisoned me. Is that what Snow wants me to forget so badly? Not what, but who?" She gave him a look that told him he was absolutely correct in thinking that.

"Who is she? Give me her name." She repeated the action a third time, spelling the letters in his palm.

"K. A. T. N. I. S. S." He frowned, more puzzled than ever.

"Katniss?" A nod. "I know I've heard it. People have been saying it recently. But I don't remember it. I don't remember saying her name. Are you sure you're thinking of the right person? This… Katniss is who I really loved?" She looked vastly irritated for a moment before her palm made contact with his cheek. It wasn't hard at all, and it didn't hurt but he blinked in complete shock.

"You just slapped me." She smirked, as if saying, I sure did.

"OK. The Mockingjay's name is Katniss. And apparently we're in love. I mean, I assume… it wasn't unrequited, was it?" She rolled her eyes and tapped his finger again. To demonstrate her point further, she held up her hand and tapped her wedding ring. His jaw dropped.

"I'm married… to the Mockingjay?" She nodded and crossed her arms again. He sighed and rubbed his temples.

"This is all so much. Are you finished eating? I think we should get back to the house and figure out when we can leave the Capitol." He used his crutches to get to his feet and held out his hand. She nodded and struggled to stand, grabbing onto him for support when she nearly fell. His eyes darted downwards and he bit his lip.

"We need to figure it out soon. I don't think you want to give birth in the Capitol." Her eyes flared with anger and he understood. He knew he needed to get her to safety and that was the top priority. If he could find Katniss along the way, he would get the answers he needed and maybe even fill in the gaps to his memory.

"Let's go," his hand went to her back and he tossed the rest of his sandwich into the trash as they walked toward the road.

* * *

Haymitch's brow was furrowed as he pored over the documents in front of him. His eyes darted across the page, grunting here and there. Someone moved to stand behind him but Haymitch had keen senses and he knew who it was without having to ask.

"Shouldn't you be with your new bride?"

"It sounded urgent. Color me curious. Although I have to admit, I'm surprised you didn't ask for the Mockingjay to come. Or… anyone else, for that matter." Finnick looked around the empty room, blinking in surprise.

"I don't trust many with this. And I have my reasons for picking you to confide in. So read this page right here." Finnick leaned in and read where Haymitch was pointing.

"I don't get it."

"You will. Read this one." Finnick obeyed and read two more pages before his eyes widened. Another page before his jaw dropped. On the last page, he actually let out a shocked curse, which he stifled with his hand.

"Do you understand the need for secrecy now?"

"Does she know?"

"Of course not."

"Haymitch, you can't keep this from her! She deserves to know!"

"I already told her that Ash's death was no accident. And she demanded to know who was involved. What do you think she will do if I tell her all of this?"

"Go running through the halls, screaming, most likely," Finnick muttered. "But it doesn't matter. She deserves to know. Does… does her mother even-?"

"I don't know. I don't think so, to be honest. She wouldn't have had access to these records. These were in the Justice Building, and I managed to salvage them from the debris. No idea how they survived but when the time comes to tell Katniss everything, this will all be laid out in print."

"It won't make it any easier. To see it in writing, I mean. And this needs to come from you. You know it does."

"He was my best friend. If I could have done anything to keep it from happening-"

"You couldn't have," the younger Victor cut him off. "It sounds like his fate was determined a long time ago. I of all people understand how jealousy and anger can fuel someone to take such actions. I saw it with my own eyes in the Capitol. Some of my would-be bidders, even, attacking the highest bidder. It's disgusting."

"It's fucked up," Haymitch murmured in agreement. "And you're right, I need to tell her. I just wish she had the boy back with her when I do."

"Do we even know if that is possible anymore?" He lowered his voice, even though there was no one in the room with them. "Boggs is saying he is lost for good."

"Peeta's love for her goes deeper than any of us realize. Even if he has forgotten her, there's a part of him that will somehow lead him back to her."

"That's great, but is it too much to hope that his memory returns before he kills her?"

"He won't kill her. Of that I'm certain."

"You have more faith than I'd expect from a Hunger Games Victor." Haymitch shrugged and closed the file on the papers.

"This rebellion started long before you were born. The fact that it might actually work, in our lifetime, is enough to keep me going." Finnick nodded, still staring at the folder.

"You know you have to tell Peeta about this too." Haymitch suddenly looked very uncomfortable.

"I don't think I'm the right one to tell him."

"But it involves him just as much as it involves Katniss!"

"Ash asked me to look after Katniss as my own daughter and I failed him. I want to be the one to tell her. As for Peeta… I think that should be left to his own family. His mother, in particular, has to face the truth sometime." Finnick looked doubtful as Haymitch tucked the papers into his jacket.

"Not a word to anyone about this, Finnick. Not even to Annie. Understood?"

"Understood. I know why you chose me to share this with. I do have an affinity with secrets, after all."

"I know you can keep a secret, Finnick, but I trust you. And you're more… mild-tempered than many people here. I'm afraid of what could happen if the wrong people find out."

"Understood," he said again. "Can we go have dinner now? I heard we were getting something OTHER than turnips!"

"Joy," Haymitch muttered, following Finnick to the dining hall.

* * *

 _ **I know this raises more questions than answers them but the plot is twisting and things will be revealed very soon! I know many of you feel that the story is dragging so I apologize for your frustration. Thanks for sticking with me and the story!**_

 _ **I am going on vacation to celebrate my birthday this week, so enjoy this one and I'll do my best to get another one up next weekend when I get back!**_

 _ **XOXOXOXO**_


	63. Chapter 63

"Refugee camps are springing up all over the borders," Coin was saying as she pointed to a map. Katniss's arm slipped as she almost dove face-first into the table. She quickly sat up and opened her eyes wide, glancing around to see if anyone had noticed. Haymitch gave her a smirk and a wink and she sighed. They had been looking at maps for hours. For days, in fact. Katniss had gone back and forth with the president about if she should be allowed to visit these camps, to boost morale. Coin thought it was a good idea but she hesitated sending their symbol into danger. Boggs said he would go with her but that didn't put Coin at ease.

"I still think it's too soon to send you out into the field," she'd said for the hundredth time.

"Even though you were wanting to send us to the Capitol just last week!"

"I have received reports from the frontline and the chances of us overtaking the Capitol peacekeepers this soon are unlikely. I don't want to send you there, or to the refugee camps. You are needed here."

"For what? All I'm doing is filming propos! I could be out in the field, meeting the people! Actually speaking to them! Wouldn't that be more useful?" Coin had dismissed the subject, yet again, and Katniss hadn't pressed the issue any more.

"Every time we send in units, peacekeepers annihilate them," Coin continued. "We need to take the peacekeepers down, head on. Destroy the ranks from the bottom. We need to strike at them before they are sent out among Panem."

"District 2," Gale said loudly. "That's where their training takes place. If we attack District 2, and cut off all their sources, they can't move out past the border."

"District 2 is full of Loyalists," Boggs said, indicating something on the map. "They're too close to the Capitol to overtake."

"Colonel Boggs, have you reached out to Commander Lyme?"

"I have, Madame President. She is interested in our cause but is hesitant. She says the the mountain is too heavily guarded." Coin pursed her lips.

"Let us take a short break. Boggs, you and Gale speak with Beetee and see if you can't come up with any ideas that will help us take the mountain. Their power lies in the heart of that mountain, where the training camps and the train stations are. Everyone else, go enjoy lunch." Katniss glanced at her arm, where dinner was in black ink. They had been talking for a lot longer than she'd thought.

* * *

Katniss and Haymitch were almost to the mess hall when Madge and Rye came running out, nearly running them over.

"Whoa, hey, where's the fire?"

"Sorry Haymitch! Katniss, do you want to come meet your new nephew?" Her eyes widened.

"April had the baby?"

"Just got the message! Come on!" Madge grabbed her hand and Katniss was yanked along the hall with her in-laws.

The infirmary was filled with people and Katniss felt uneasy, like she didn't really belong here. But April and Bing gave her big smiles and gestured her forward. Rye cradled the baby in his arms and he shook his head.

"He looks just like Peeta did when he was born," he said in awe.

"You were too young to remember what he looked like," Bing chuckled. "But you're right, he really does. All blonde curls and just look at those eyes. That's his mommy's smile though." April smiled tiredly, leaning back against the pillow.

"You want to hold him, Katniss?"

"Oh!" She bit her lip and cast an anxious look at April.

"Go ahead, Katniss," she giggled. Rye slid the babe into her arms and she swallowed thickly. Bright blue eyes blinked up at her and her heart started to race. The Mellark boys all looked alike, so of course she could see her husband in Bing's son. But she started to wonder what Peeta's child might look like. Would it be blue eyes, or grey? Would it have dark hair, or blonde curls like the baby in her arms? She blinked back tears and forced a smile.

"He's beautiful, April. Congratulations to you both."

"Grandpa wants to hold him," Bran moved forward, eagerly taking the baby from her. She suddenly noticed who was missing from the cooing crowd and she looked around. Sure enough, Mrs. Mellark was pouting in the corner, her arms crossed over her chest. Katniss resisted the urge to walk over and slap her.

"Alright, there are too many people in here right now," Violet stood in front of April's bed, her hands on her hips. "April needs to rest now. Only the father may stay."

"Come on, Vi, it's my first grandchild," Bran said pleadingly as the others started to say goodbye. Violet's lips were tightened but Katniss saw she was trying not to smile.

"The father and the grandparents, then." Bran went back to bouncing the baby and making funny faces at him. Katniss couldn't help but smile. She could definitely see Peeta reacting the same way.

Her heart was still racing and she nudged Madge.

"Congratulations again, April. Bing." The new parents nodded in thanks as the family streamed out of the room.

"Ugh, your mother is unbelievable," Katniss said as soon as they were down the hall. "Did you see the way she was acting?"

"She's just mad it's not a girl," Rye shrugged.

"That's pathetic. Is she going to treat the baby like she treated Peeta? Just because he's a boy?"

"I agree with Katniss. A baby is a miracle! It doesn't matter what the sex is, he's family! Someone should talk to her."

"Be my guest," he shook his head. "She's always been like that. There's no talking to her, honey. But you're welcome to try." Madge rolled her eyes in disgust. Katniss remembered Peeta telling her one night about how his mother had refused to nurse him after he was born. All because of his sex. Something beyond his control, something that should have been celebrated, actually. A boy in the family was a good omen in District 12. The Mellarks had been thought of as lucky because of all of the boys. Katniss couldn't understand how Mrs. Mellark could be angry at Peeta for being born.

"You ok, Katniss?" She glanced to the side and nodded.

"Fine. I just… miss Peeta." Rye and Madge shot her looks of sympathy and Rye's head whipped around in surprise.

"Mom, what are you doing? I thought you and Dad were staying with the baby?"

"Why bother? You've seen one Mellark boy, you've seen them all," she sighed as she hurried past them. Katniss's fists clenched.

"You're a horrible woman! Your first grandchild was just born and all you care about is that he's a boy!" Margaret froze in her tracks and whirled around.

"DON'T talk to me about grandchildren, Everdeen! I'm shocked that you haven't produced a little Seam brat already, the way Peeta was always following you around. It will be just my luck that the first girl born into the family will be from YOU!"

"Mellark! My name is Mellark! It's the same as yours, it shouldn't be that damn hard to remember! And do you want to know something? I hope I do have a girl! So that I can flaunt her in your face and tell you that the son you hate so much, the son you wish hadn't been born, is the one who gave you a granddaughter! And you won't be a part of her life!"

"Holy shit," Rye said weakly. "Uh, let's get going Katniss. We're late for dinner."

"Choosing a Seam slut over your own family," Margaret snarled. "You're just like your worthless brother."

"Since my brother isn't here to defend his wife, I will. Not that she needs any defending. I remember her first dinner with the family, she put you in your place, Mother. You need to open your eyes and realize that you don't have a lot of family left. Do you really want to push all of us away? Because that's what you're doing. If you don't accept Bing's baby, you will lose your favorite son. And his wife. And if you don't stop bullying Katniss and Peeta, you will lose all of us. Just think about it, Mom. Is your bitterness toward Seam people really worth that?" He shook his head, wrapped one arm around Madge, the other around Katniss, and left his mother gaping after them.

Katniss was silent during dinner and was quite grateful when Haymitch came to get her for another meeting.

"It's so late though," Madge said, her eyes wide in surprise.

"President Coin has some important news she would like to share. You're both welcome to come as well. Colonel Boggs respects all of your opinions."

"Is this about the refugee camps being destroyed? Finnick told me we lost a lot of soldiers last week to the peacekeepers."

"It's not just that. Come on." They walked in silence and Haymitch hummed to himself.

"By the way, how's the newest little Mellark doing?"

"He's so adorable," Madge squealed. "Oh my god, Rye, I've never really wanted a baby until that moment!"

"Oh...heh," Rye's cheeks went pink and Katniss bit her lip to keep from laughing at the fear in his eyes. "Maybe… maybe one day."

"I can't imagine bringing a baby into this world," Katniss shook her head. "April is brave but crazy."

"We're fighting to change the world, Katniss," Madge said patiently. "So that our children's names will never be in a Reaping bowl. That's the future that we are fighting for."

"Katniss definitely put Mom in her place again," Rye said with a grin. Haymitch's brow raised.

"That so?"

"She is a cold-hearted bitch," Katniss spat. "She won't hold her grandson because he's a boy. I told her I hope I have a girl so that I can keep her AWAY from her grandmother."

"That's a little cold, Katniss," Haymitch said reproachfully.

"Excuse me? SHE'S cold!"

"I'm not defending her, sweetheart. Margaret has never exactly been known for her warmth and kindness in the district. But she has two brothers and then had three sons. I'm sure she feels a little outnumbered. She probably just can't relate to her sons that well so she wishes she had a little girl to bond with. Think about when you were a kid, Rye. Did you ever run to your mom when you were hurt or excited?" Rye wrinkled his nose in thought.

"I guess not… no. I went to Dad. But that's because she would brush us off. Especially Peeta. He tried to go to her plenty."

"She was already burned by it plenty by then, I imagine. Bing and you going to your dad first for everything, I imagine it hurt a little."

"You're trying to get me to feel sympathetic towards her, and it's not going to work," Katniss scowled. "She hit Peeta. She was mad that he was born, that he wasn't a girl. She was a terrible mother."

"People act like they are raised, Katniss. If you aren't raised with much love, how are you going to show it to other people?" Katniss scoffed and shoved the door open. Coin gave her a smile and gestured for her to sit down.

"Katniss, there's someone I would like you to meet." She turned and indicated the holo, where a woman's image greeted her. She was middle-aged and heavily muscled. Her blonde hair was clipped short and her blue eyes blazed with authority.

"Commander Lyme, our Mockingjay. Katniss Everdeen Mellark."

"It's nice to finally meet you, Katniss," Lyme inclined her head. "President Coin tells me that you are eager to help the rebellion."

"President Snow has my husband in his clutches and has turned him against me. I want to do whatever I can to bring him and the Capitol to its knees." The woman smiled and it made Katniss shiver. She knew where she had seen this woman.

"You're a Hunger Games Victor."

"Indeed. But now to important matters. I understand your soldiers have an idea on how to take the Nut?"

"Nut?"

"It's what we call the mountain. It's a tough nut to crack, as Plutarch put it." Plutarch looked quite pleased with himself.

"Now then, a brief history of District 2. The Nut was established directly after the Dark Days, when the Capitol had lost 13 and was desperate for a new underground stronghold. They had some of their military resources situated on the outskirts of the Capitol itself - nuclear missiles, aircraft, troops - but a significant chunk of their power was now under an enemy's control. Of course, there was no way they could hope to replicate 13, which was the work of centuries. However, in the old mines of nearby District 2, they saw opportunity. From the air, the Nut appeared to be just another mountain with a few entrances on its faces. But inside were vast cavernous spaces where slabs of stones had been cut, hauled to the surface, and transported down slippery narrow roads to make distant buildings. There was even a train system to facilitate transporting the miners from the Nut to the very center of the main town in District 2. It runs right to the square."

"I'm confused," Madge raised her hand. "Isn't everyone in District 2 a Loyalist?"

"If they were, I wouldn't be here young lady." Madge blushed and hid her hand in her lap. Rye shot her an irritated look.

"I was taken from my home to become a Peacekeeper, Commander Lyme. I know most people in 2 agree with the Capitol."

"But not all of them. Of course, the people of 2 have swallowed the Capitol's propaganda more easily than the rest of Panem. Embraced their ways. But for all that, at the end of the day, we are still slaves. And if that's lost on the citizens who become Peacekeepers or work in the Nut, it is not lost on the stonecutters who form the backbone of the resistance here. We work tirelessly to influence others in our district. To show them the atrocities of the Hunger Games and the way the Snows have suppressed us. There is a good amount of soldiers willing to fight for change. But the Nut is impenetrable. I'll give you all a virtual tour."

* * *

After she finished the presentation, Coin addressed the room.

"We need ideas on how to seize the Nut."

"And do not say we need to storm the entrances," Lyme cut in. "That strategy has been tried repeatedly, with great losses. If you are going to suggest that particular strategy, you'd better have a brilliant way to do it, because you're going to be the one leading that mission!"

"Is it really so necessary that we take the Nut? Or would it be enough to disable it?" Everyone turned to Gale. Beetee pushed his glasses higher onto his nose.

"That would be a step in the right direction. What do you have in mind?"

"Think of it as a wild dog den," Gale continued. "You're not going to fight your way in. So you have two choices. Trap the dogs inside or flush them out."

"We've tried bombing the entrances," Lyme shook her head. "They're set too far inside the stone for any real damage to be done."

"I wasn't thinking of that," Gale said, crossing over to the image of the Nut. "I was thinking of using the mountain." Beetee joined Gale at the table. "See? Running down the sides?"

"Avalanche paths," said Beetee under his breath. "It'd be tricky. We'd have to design the detonation sequence with great care, and once it's in motion, we couldn't hope to control it."

"We don't need to control it if we give up the idea that we have to possess the Nut," Gale shook his head. "Only shut it down."

"So you're suggesting we start avalanches and block the entrances," Rye asked in shock.

"That's it," Gale nodded. "Trap the enemy inside, cut off from supplies. Make it impossible for them to send out their hovercraft."

While everyone considered the plan, Boggs flipped through a stack of blueprints of the Nut and frowned. "You risk killing everyone inside. Look at the ventilation system. It's rudimentary at best. Nothing like what we have in Thirteen. It depends entirely on pumping in air from the mountainsides. Block those vents and you'll suffocate whoever is trapped."

"They could still escape through the train tunnel to the square," Beetee said, peering at the blueprints.

"Not if we blow it up," said Gale brusquely. His intent, his full intent, became clear. Gale had no interest in preserving the lives of those in the Nut. No interest in caging the prey for later use. Katniss could see the Hunter she had once respected. His eyes blazed with fury and Beetee tapped his chin.

"Gale, the majority of the workers are citizens from Two," Madge pointed out.

"So what?" Gale shrugged. "We'll never be able to trust them again."

"They should at least have a chance to surrender," Lyme protested.

"Well, that's a luxury we weren't given when they fire-bombed Twelve, but you're all so much cozier with the Capitol over there," Gale spat. The look on Lyme's face made Katniss glad that she was just on the holo and not here in person. She would surely shoot him. But her anger only seemed to infuriate him because he yelled, "We watched children burn to death and there was nothing we could do!"

Katniss squeezed her eyes shut. His words had the effect, and she could see that others in the room were considering his words. It was a mixture of people, from 12, from 13, and from other districts. But she couldn't condemn anyone to the death he was suggesting. She took his arm and pulled him aside.

"Gale, the Nut's an old mine. It'd be like causing a massive coal mining accident." Surely her words would make him stop and think. But he pulled away, shaking his head.

"But not so quick as the one that killed our fathers," he said bitterly. "Is that everyone's problem? That our enemies might have a few hours to reflect on the fact that they're dying, instead of just being blown to bits?"

"You don't know how those District Two people ended up in the Nut," Rye said loudly. "They may have been coerced. They may be held against their will. Some are our own spies. Will you kill them, too?"

"I would sacrifice a few, yes, to take out the rest of them," Gale turned on him. "And if I were a spy in there, I'd say, 'Bring on the avalanches!'" Rye scoffed but Katniss knew that Gale would sacrifice his life in this way for the cause. But it was a coldhearted decision to make for other people and those who love them. Rye was about to protest further when Beeetee rolled his chair forward.

"You said we had two choices," Boggs tells him. "To trap them or to flush them out. I say we try to avalanche the mountain but leave the train tunnel alone. People can escape into the square, where we'll be waiting for them."

"Heavily armed, I hope," Gale scoffed. "You can be sure they'll be."

"Heavily armed. We'll take them prisoner," Boggs agreed. "Commander Coin, Madame President, what do you both of you think?"

"We'll discuss it in private," Coin said quickly. "Thank you all for coming. You are dismissed."

"One moment, President Coin," Lyme held up her hand. "I was hoping you all could help me with one other thing. My soldiers surprised a group of Capitol Peacekeepers earlier today and captured their Leader. I was later informed that I actually had the First General of Panem in captivity. He is apparently a lapdog to both Snow and the Minister of Defense. My soldiers have been calling for a public execution but upon visiting with him, it seems like he may not be as loyal to the Capitol as we thought. What do you suggest we do with him?"

"Execute him," several men called from the back of the room. Coin held up her hand for silence.

"Commander Lyme, do you know who this man is? Snow has changed so many positions in the government as of late and I don't even know who the current First General is."

"He tells me he is not from the Capitol. He seems quite… lost, to be honest with you." Haymitch suddenly stood and placed his palms on the table.  
"Commander, do you have any footage of this man?" Lyme nodded and her image briefly disappeared from the holo. A soldier in a tiny cell came up on the screen. His blonde hair looked to be matted with blood and when he tilted his bruised face toward the camera, Katniss gasped and fell out of her chair.

Coin whirled around sharply, her eyes narrowing as Madge and Rye hurried forward to help Katniss to her feet.

"Is that…?"

"Peeta Mellark, Madame President," Boggs nodded. "The Mockingjay's husband."

"Are you certain?" Lyme's voice said. "This man is clearly a trained Peacekeeper. He has blood on his hands."

"My brother and I were taken to 2 when we were young, Commander," Rye said loudly. "He has been poisoned, many times, in fact, so that he will forget who he is. Snow is using him as a weapon. Whatever he has done, it's not his fault."

"Execute him," more angry cries came. Katniss stifled a sob.

"Stop it," Madge stood up and faced the room. "Peeta is one of us! Like Rye said, his mind has been poisoned. But he loves Katniss and if we can reunite them, I'm certain he will remember her!"

"He has not mentioned Katniss nor has he said anything about being poisoned. He merely said he was First General of Panem and was ordered to raid a refugee camp near the border."

"Ask him about her," Haymitch urged. "This could be our chance to get him back. Just ask him if he remembers her, or anything about District 12."

"Very well. I'll talk to him more after dinner. And I will not make a decision regarding his punishment until I have spoken to him. If we decide he is not a threat, the Mockingjay may come and collect him."

"Or you can release him and he can come to 13," Haymitch frowned. "Why does Katniss need to come there?"

"She said she wanted to help with the rebellion," Lyme pointed out. "We will need someone to speak to the citizens of District 2. Someone to sway them to our side. Isn't that what the Mockingjay is meant to do, after all?" Haymitch glanced uneasily at Katniss but she nodded, standing straight.

"I'll come to 2. We'll decide what to do with the Nut and I will be there to talk to them. Treat Peeta well. And please tell him I…" she trailed off, glancing around the room. She needed to be seen as a soldier and a symbol, not some whimpering girl in love. She cleared her throat and sat back down.

"Please tell him I'm waiting for him." Lyme nodded and Coin dismissed the room.

"At least we know where he is," Rye said comfortingly. "And he's no longer in the Capitol's clutches!"

"Right. He's in a rebel prison where soldiers want to kill him."

"Lyme won't kill him, Katniss. And Coin is bound to let you go to 2! She knows you have the best chance of talking people down. You're going to get him back! You'll see him again soon!" Katniss nodded, feeling her heart lift only slightly. There was still so much that could go wrong. They were still thousands of miles apart. Any one of Lyme's soldiers could decide that Peeta was a traitor and kill him without orders. Katniss needed to go to 2 as soon as possible. She needed Coin to make the decision about the Nut fast.

And she would be on the hovercraft whether or not Coin gave her permission to go.


	64. Life Update

I just wanted to write a quick apology/update to everyone! I just lost my (dream) job last week and my insurance right after. Being in this country as a Diabetic without insurance is a death sentence. In short, my depression has been kicking my ass and I haven't felt like writing. I will be back as soon as I can! I adore my readers and hope to get life straightened out soon!

Love and pixie dust,

Panskiss


	65. Chapter 65

_**First of all, I want to send a huge thank you to this entire community. You truly are the most wonderful readers a writer could ask for and I'm so grateful for all of your messages of love and support! I was even inspired to write, so enjoy this next one!**_

 _ **Secondly, pertaining to this chapter, I know there are still lots of questions to be answered and this one doesn't help any. The next few chapters will hopefully wrap up quite a bit of the story and will answer some of your eager questions.**_

 _ **Thank you again! I couldn't think of leaving yall for too long. Still job-hunting, still depressed, but I'm doing better each day! ❤❤❤**_

* * *

There was a knock at the door and Snow sighed as he dropped the document he was reading.

"Enter." The President leaned back in his chair, surprised to see the General standing there.

"General Mellark. Come in."

"Sorry for the interruption, Mr. President."

"Not at all. I trust you are feeling better?"

"Yes sir. Almost good as new. These are just for show," he flashed a weak smile as he held the crutches up.

"Well I'm glad you're here. I wanted to inform you I made a decision this morning. As of two hours ago, you are First General of Panem." Peeta's eyes widened.

"Sir?"

"It was admirable, the way you fought the rebels to defend your wife. I only wish the Mockingjay was with them so you could have killed her."

"Right… the Mockingjay…" he trailed off, looking uncomfortable. Snow's brow raised.

"We have spies moving toward District 13 as we speak, to inform us of her whereabouts. When the time comes, we will launch an attack. I expect you to be the one to take care of it."

"Of course, sir. Keep me informed. I was, uh, actually coming to ask for your assistance with something." Snow waited, and Peeta's eyes darted around the room. Calm down, Mellark. Don't give him any reason to suspect anything is out of the ordinary.

He had talked it over with Rosalie that morning. He'd decided that he couldn't risk using the idea of visiting her family, as Snow knew very well that Rosalie came from 12. So anything Peeta told him would be a lie.

"We can't give him any reason to suspect us," he had said quietly, the sound of the shower running drowning out his words. "If we tell him we are visiting your family, he'll know we are lying and trying to escape. Where can we go that won't seem suspicious?" She drew 1 and 3 in his palm and he shook his head.

"We can't go to 13 yet. It's much too far and we don't know who here is on our side. We need to get away from the Capitol first, and try to get a message to the Mockingjay." He still had a hard time using her actual name. It bothered him that he still couldn't really remember anything about her. What if Rosalie was wrong? What if she wasn't the girl he was in love with?

Peeta rubbed his head and winced. The pain had been getting worse all day and he squeezed his eyes shut.

"Peter? Are you alright?"

"Fine sir. Just a headache. No doubt it's from those damn rebels knocking me out."

"You should be resting. What is it you wanted to ask of me?"

"Some of my soldiers have reported unrest around District 2. I was hoping to visit the training camps to ensure there is no trouble or rebellious activity."

"Very well. You leave in the morning."

"Thank you sir. I was also hoping Lavinia could accompany me." Snow looked surprised and Peeta bit his lip.

"We are getting so close… in the pregnancy, sir, and after what happened, I just don't want to let her out of my sight. If anything else should happen to her… I don't know what I'd do." Snow crossed his arms. Interesting. Mellark had gone from wanting nothing to do with the girl to expressing his devotion. Well, at least she wasn't able to speak. And he had plenty of spies who could follow him around in 2.

"Permission granted, General. You both leave on the first train."

"Thank you, President Snow. I know Lavinia will be relieved. She was uneasy about me leaving again."

"Of course. Since you will already be in 2, there is something I want you to do for me."

"Of course, sir."

"There have been reported sightings of rebel refugee camps appearing on the borders. District 3, especially, after the bombing." Bombing? What bombing? Peeta tried not to look too surprised.

"Yes sir."

"I want you to take your soldiers, find these camps, and destroy them. Examples must be made, and I want the country to see what rebellion means."

"Sir… there will undoubtedly be women and children in those camps. Surely-"

"You were given these orders before the rebel attack, General Mellark. If they choose to support the wrong side, they are considered traitors. I want you to kill them all." Peeta swallowed thickly. Had he murdered children in the past? What kind of monster was he, really? Since he couldn't remember much, he wondered what atrocities he had committed. Perhaps Rosalie would be able to tell him. Perhaps he would find someone else in 2 he could trust.

"Understood sir," he said flatly. Snow nodded and watched the General hobble out of the room. He pressed a button on the desk and snapped at his secretary.

"Egeria, get Antonius in here."

Peeta was almost out the door when he noticed Snow's daughter hurrying toward him.

"M-Miss Snow! How are you today?" Aurelia wondered if he even remembered her name. He had been hijacked so many times now, were there any memories left in his mind?

"It's nice to see you, General Mellark. How are you feeling?"

"I'm well, Miss Snow, thank you for asking."

"And your wife?"

"She's improving. It's quite an adjustment but we are… coping." Aurelia nodded and glanced upstairs.

"Were you having a meeting with Daddy?"

"Indeed, I was. He is sending me to District 2, and Lavinia is allowed to accompany me. We will be checking on the training camps near the mountain."

"I see. Well I'd like to see her again, when you return. Please tell her she's welcome to come by anytime."

"I will, thank you Miss Snow."

"Aurelia, please, General." Peeta nodded. Aurelia. He knew that.

No he hadn't. Ugh, he was a mess. Why couldn't he remember anything?

Because he'd had so much poison pumped into his system that he should have been dead. Why wasn't he dead?

"Until next time then, Aurelia." Peeta reached for her hand and Aurelia looked surprised when he pressed his lips to her skin. She watched him hobble down the drive and sighed deeply. She'd been hoping to speak to the General's wife and reveal to her what all she knew. She was certain that the poor woman would be interested in what Aurelia had to say.

Well, perhaps the General would be too? She bit her lip and watched his retreating back. Her father trusted him. Probably because he was more Capitol machine than anything else now. The meeting she had attended had horrified her. She wanted to make things right but if the General was loyal to her father, she couldn't involve him. Not yet anyway.

But her orders had been to get Lavinia to attend a meeting. Rosalie, she corrected herself in her mind. Her father had stripped the woman of her identity completely. He'd murdered her husband, taken her identity and now her freedom to speak. Aurelia was angry for the young woman. Just because she was from the districts didn't give her father the right to take such liberties with peoples' lives.

"I'll just wait until they return to the Capitol," she muttered to herself, turning on her heel. She nearly smacked into the Minister's chest and she reared back.

"Minister Antonius."

"Miss Aurelia. Terribly sorry, are you alright?"

"Fine. Are you here to speak to Daddy?"

"Actually I was hoping to catch General Mellark before he leaves the Capitol." She waved toward the door.

"You just missed him."

"Damn. Did he say where he was going?"

"I think Daddy has given some orders," she shrugged nonchalantly. Antonius cursed under his breath and fled up the stairs without another word to Aurelia. She rolled her eyes and shook her head as she made her way to her room. She hated the Minister of Defense. Her grandfather had trusted him, as her father seemed to do, but Aurelia had heard her mother and father talking about how the Minister was digging his own grave. She hoped he dug it quickly. The man gave her the creeps.

* * *

"Sir, what makes you think that Mellark will follow your orders?"

"If he doesn't, there are plenty of Loyalist soldiers who will inform us. However, I have confidence that he will carry out the orders. I have contacted the Head Peacekeeper in 2, to inform him that Mellark is coming and to keep an eye on him. It seems that the man remembers Mellark from his training."

"Who is it? Who is Head Peacekeeper now?"

"Commander Rossex. He was recently promoted, after Thread's death. He seemed quite… eager to see Mellark again."

"Should we worry, President Snow? What if he seeks vengeance on Mellark?"

"Let Mellark take care of him then. I promoted him to First General, so he may deal with anyone who tries to give him a problem. Rossex asked why Mellark's memory is gone so I told him he suffered a blow to the head and can't remember anything."

"Very good, sir." Snow tilted his head.

"I must admit, Antonius, I disagree with the amount of times it has been done but hijacking the boy was a good idea afterall."

"Your father disagreed, sir. When I told him of the plan, he insisted we find another way to bring him to our side."

"My father was a fool."

"Which is why I gave the orders for it to be done anyway," Antonius shrugged. "Duartyr reported that Mellark was strong but susceptible to the tracker-jacker venom. He had no idea what exactly we were doing to Mellark but he guessed."

"Duartyr knew about the experiments?"

"Not really. Yes, he suspected that something else was going on. After all, hijacking will supposedly kill the victim after some time. The amount we have used on him thus far should have made his heart stop ages ago. It's the other experiments that have saved him."

"And my father? Did he know of the procedures as well?"

"Oh, I thought it best to keep silent about it… after all, the old man was worried about an ancient curse. I think his mental state was slightly off," he chuckled. Snow looked somber as he tapped his fingers together.

"On that, we disagree Antonius. My father may have been an old fool but he was very cunning and aware of nearly every tradition and legend in Panem. He studied cultural differences when he was young, you know. At first people thought he was so eager to learn about the districts because he wanted to relate to them. Wanted to understand them. But people don't realize that Corialianus Snow was born during the Dark Days, when the country was at war. Neighbor against neighbor, mother against son. It was when he was four years old that the Hunger Games were created. He barely understood it."

"How do you know of all of this, Mr. President? He never spoke of any of this to me."

"Why would he," Snow snorted. "You're not a Snow, Minister. You're not privy to those secrets. The Snows have eons of secrets hidden away."

"But you haven't been in power for that long."

"Doesn't mean we weren't around," he leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms. "My point, Minister, is that I too believe in prophecies and legends. And District 12, especially, is known for the dark magic it hides. Witches live there. Or lived, I should say. Who knows if that old woman really was a witch but her predictions came true, didn't they? Which is why we won't KILL Mellark. We will continue to use him. As long as we make sure he doesn't remember anything from his previous life, he will do what we need him to do."

"But you said we won't administer any more venom on him-"

"And we won't," Snow rolled his eyes. "We can't risk any more. We can, however, continue the procedures and see if we can't turn him into even more of a weapon."

"The doctors reported the last injection gave him strength to throw three soldiers into the wall. They were killed on impact. His strength is becoming unprecedented."

"Imagine, then, what he could do to the little District 12 brat he loved so much. He'll snap her neck before she has a chance to speak his name. Can the effects be reversed?"

"Not that we know of, but that doesn't mean it can't happen. These practices are highly secretive and very, very old."

"It doesn't surprise me that this was created during the Dark Days. Creating weapons to wipe out armies is a brilliant idea. He can still be harmed though, is that correct?"

"He isn't invincible, sir. You know that he nearly died from the lashing in 12. He had almost a hundred lashes on his back. No normal soldier could survive that. It's the chemicals in his bloodstream that saved him. But if he gets shot in battle or something, yes, he can die."

"And Mellark is the only person to have this many injections of serum?"

"As far as we know, no one had this much, even during the Dark Days. Of course, our scientists have been practicing in secret for many, many years. They hid after the Treaty of Treason and continued to work on it. They gave Mellark his first injection upon his arrival in 2. Switching it with tracker-jacker venom every so often kept him from becoming unstoppable. The tracker-jacker venom is what distorts his memories. Our research tells us that the serum only affects physical strength. Having them both inside him, however, seems to have had an interesting effect. It seems that the serum has counteracted the venom." Snow's eyes narrowed.

"I beg your pardon?"

"I have just come from Professor Olecto's laboratory, and he informed me that the serum may be restoring some of Mellark's memories. That's why I insisted we administer another dose of venom after the girl tried to tell him who he was. I asked the Professor if it was wise to continue administering the venom in tiny increments, just to keep him paranoid and his memories at bay, and he agreed with me. It's why I was hoping to catch Mellark before he leaves the Capitol."

"I said no more venom and I meant it," Snow growled. "I spoke to the doctors and they said any more may cause him to go into cardiac arrest. We don't want that, especially when he will be the one to murder the Mockingjay for us."

"President Snow, you are not in danger," Antonius said impatiently. "The old woman was a hag and her predictions were a hoax. You can kill him today and nothing will happen to you." Snow jumped to his feet and placed his palms on the desk.

"Kill him then and bring down plagues upon you and your family. She said the boy was not to leave the district until his 16th birthday and when the soldiers attempted to bring the child back to the Capitol, they all mysteriously died. When they kidnapped him and his brother before his 16th birthday, they barely made it over the border before they collapsed. The soldiers in District 10 drove the wagon and then they died. The soldiers in District 9 took over, and then THEY died. It took a week to get to District 2. And every pair of soldiers who took control of the wagon died. Until they reached District 2. And the soldiers who started driving at the border…. They survived. Do you want to know why, Antonius?" Antonius shook his head, looking incredulous but Snow slapped his hands down.

"Because he turned 16 as he passed into District 2! And the soldiers lived! There was some sort of protection spell or curse or something keeping him in District 12! And my father was worried. Even though the woman GAVE him to us, my father knew something was not right. I hope we managed to murder every last of Mellark's family when we bombed the district. I don't want to think about his mother alive somewhere."

"Sir… with all due respect, this all sounds insane. And I will prove it to you. I will follow him to 2. And I will kill him there."

"We still need him! Wait for him to kill the Mockingjay… then whoever kills him after, may the curse fall on them." Antonius rubbed his face and shook his head.

"At least allow me to administer one final dosage of venom before he leaves. He may start to remember more while away from the Capitol."

"No. More. Venom," Snow growled. "We can still use him. And if I hear of you disobeying me, YOU will be locked in a cell with live tracker-jackers. I doubt very much that you will survive like Mellark did." A flash of fear appeared on Antonius's face so instead of speaking, he bowed low and hurried out of the office.

"Superstitious fools," he muttered as he passed Egeria's desk. She stiffened but didn't look up. The president's door remained closed so she went about her work as usual.

* * *

Peeta burst into the house and looked around.

"Ros...Lavinia," he caught himself and cleared his throat. "Darling, are you home?" Rosalie came out of the kitchen, wiping her hands on a towel.

"Pack your things, dearest. We leave for District 2 in the morning." Her eyes widened.

"I think I would like to shower. Care to join me?" She followed him down the hall to the bathroom and watched as he bent over to turn the shower on. He gestured for her to sit on the toilet lid and he knelt in front of her, with some difficulty.

"I don't think he suspects anything. But I might be in a little bit of trouble when we arrive in 2." She frowned.

"He's ordered me to raid refugee camps. To kill everyone inside." Her eyes widened again and she went pale, clutching her stomach as if she was going to be sick.

"Hey, I promise that you'll be safe. I will get you to 13, if that's where you want to go. But we have to be careful about it. He promoted me to First General of Panem, which means we will have a bit more freedom to move around the country. But I know he is going to have people following me. So we need to be careful. Assume that our lodgings will still be bugged. That we will have people watching us. I make you this promise, though, Rosalie, you won't give birth in the Capitol." Her eyes teared up and she squeezed his hand.

"Let's pack our things, then. Anything you need to keep with you. We're not planning to come back here." Rosalie nodded and stood. Peeta waited a few minutes more, before he turned the water off. He went into the bedroom and set the crutches against the door. He set his bag on the bed and started to throw some clothes in. He didn't think he had any special belongings. Not here, anyway. He hoped, when they finally made it to 13, he would meet someone who would. Rosalie had managed to explain to him that his family was still alive and most likely in 13 as well. It hurt Peeta to admit that he didn't remember his family either. He hoped it would all come back when he saw them again.

And Katniss. His stomach twisted uncomfortably when he thought of her name, mainly because his memory of her was still not returning. He heard Rosalie coming up behind him, and she held what looked to be a photo to her chest. She handed it to him and he took it with a puzzled frown. Rosalie was wearing a wedding dress and a lovely smile, clutching the arm of a red-haired Peacekeeper. Peeta knew his face. Darius, Rosalie had told him. Her real husband.

And beside them… a slender girl with olive skin and dark hair that was wrapped around her head. At first, Peeta thought nothing of the girl. There was nothing special about her, really. Not very big… or pretty.

But as he looked closer, her eyes were the first thing to catch his attention. They weren't grey, as he originally thought, but actual rays of silver, like the moonlight through his window. Her lips were turned up into a smile and Peeta had the impression that she didn't smile much. But she looked quite happy in this photo. She was about the same height as Rosalie was, and looked much too skinny but then again, so did Rosalie. He looked up from the picture and mouthed Katniss's name. She nodded and gave him a sad smile before turning back to her packing. He wanted to ask her how she had gotten this, how did she have it here with her, but as it was pretty wrinkled, he guessed she had been hiding it. He turned back to his bag, still staring at the girl. His wife.

"Katniss," he whispered, trailing a finger over the photograph.

She was beautiful, he decided. His hand clapped to his forehead as he was overcome with pictures, only half formed and flashing across his mind. They were all from his perspective and she was in every single one. He watched her sleep, a worried crease between her eyes. He saw a younger girl crouching beside an apple tree. He saw his own hands holding out a cake, her eyes welling up with tears. He saw her kneeling in front of a fire, holding a piece of bread toward him. He saw her on her knees between his legs and he shivered, knowing what must have transpired that night. He saw her standing beside a table, clinging to his hand, tears streaming down her cheeks. He saw her underneath him, her face flushed and lovely as she tossed her head back and mouthed his name.

Rosalie's hand on his arm made the memories cease altogether and he gasped as his eyes shot open. Her grey eyes were wide with concern and he shook his head, holding his hand to his heart.

"M'fine." She blinked and tilted her head.

"Um, I'll be right back." He hurried to the bathroom, holding the picture close to his heart and he shut the door behind him.

He leaned against the sink and stared down at the picture. Rosalie was right. Peeta felt stirrings, ok, no, it was more like intense waves of emotion when he looked at her face. He wanted all of his memories to return. He wanted to remember every moment he'd had with her. Small flashes just weren't enough; he wanted the whole thing. He wanted to look into her eyes and hear her speak his name. Would it ever happen again? Would she accept him with open arms with so much time spent apart? He bit his lip and lowered his head.

He would find her again. He had a feeling he had made this resolution before. He would do whatever he could to help her win this war, and he would never leave her side again.

He glanced into the mirror and was surprised to see how flushed his face was. He splashed some water into his face, dried off with a towel, and stuffed the photo in his pocket, ready to be on his way back to her.


	66. Chapter 66

**_I hope everyone hsd a wonderful Thsnksgiving, if you celebrate it. I'd hoped to have this one up a little earlier but hope you enjoy!_**

 ** _Xoxo_**

* * *

 _"Peet?" The baker searched and searched for his son but didn't see him. Strange. The front of the bakery had already been swept clean and the cases had been wiped down. There was even a loaf of bread started on the counter. His youngest was the early riser of his three children. He had to be here somewhere._

 _"Peeta?" He heard a rustling and paused. He bent low and found his son with his knees tucked into his chest and his head lowered in his arms._

 _"Peeta? What's wrong, son?" The boy's head snapped up and he surged forward into his father's strong arms. Bran wrapped his arms around Peeta and held his trembling body tightly._

 _"What's the matter, my Sonnenschein?" Peeta smiled weakly into his father's shoulder. His father had pet names for all of the Mellark boys but Peeta loved his the most. Sonnenschein. His father's sunshine._

 _"You won't give me away, will you Papa?" Bran tensed._

 _"Give you away? What are you talking about, son?"_

 _"Mama told the mean men they could take me away. They said they would be back for me later. Please don't let her give me away!" He burst into tears again and Bran brought him into his lap, cupping his fair cheek._

 _"You are my son, Peeta, and no one will ever take you away. Now, why don't you tell me the whole story? Beginning to end? Hm?" Peeta sniffled and wiped his nose._

 _"Mama called me in here and told me I was going to live with these nice men from now on. Only, they didn't look nice. They had big guns and shiny white suits. The man she was talking to reminded me of a snake! He looked really mean, Papa. Please don't make me go live with them." Bran's brow furrowed. He had no idea what his son was talking about. No clue whatsoever. Peeta's blue eyes widened in fear and he gripped his father's hand._

 _"Please don't tell Mama I told you! She said I couldn't tell anyone. I just had to go pack a bag and be ready to leave. She will hit me for telling you, Daddy, please don't tell her!"_

 _"Shh," Bran rocked his son gently. "Sonnenschein. How could I possibly let my favorite child be taken away?" Peeta sniffled and attempted to smile._

 _"Come. Let's start preparing for the day. Stay by my side the entire time, alright Peet? Whatever your mother says, don't leave my side."_

 _"Yes Daddy." Bran kissed Peeta's cheek and set him on the ground. Peeta wiped his face with his palms and Bran chuckled when there was a streak of flour left there. He used his apron to wipe Peeta's cheeks and ruffled his curls as he stood._

 _"Lots to do today, son. It's almost Reaping Day, so we need to get ready." Peeta shivered. He hated Reaping Day. The people in his district changed completely. So sad and tense._

 _"When will my name be in the big bowl, Papa?"_

 _"You still have two years before your name goes into the Reaping Bowl, son. Two more years to stay young and innocent. So try not to think about it." His father cupped his chin and smiled before starting on the loaves of bread. Peeta climbed up onto the chair to watch his father work. He loved watching his father's big hands knead the dough so carefully. He hoped he would be that good one day._

 _"Peet? How about you start frosting those small cakes for me?" His eyes widened and he whipped his head around to look at the cakes on the counter. His father shot him a wink before resuming the kneading. Peeta scrambled over to the counter and eagerly pulled the tray of cakes toward him. Decorating the cakes was his absolute favorite! His mother never let him pick up a piping bag but his father, who was in the kitchen more often than his mother, encouraged him to practice and Peeta loved it. He started to mix a bowl of frosting, his tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth. Bran watched him with a proud smile._

* * *

Bran's eyes shot open and he sat up in bed. He held his hand to his mouth, whimpering slightly.

"Peeta," he whispered. He carefully pushed the blankets back and stood on the cold ground.

"Bran. Come back to bed," his wife grumbled.

"Sorry to wake you, dearest. Go back to sleep."

"Where are you going," she asked as she sat up.

"I just need to take a walk."

"That's against the rules. Why do you insist on defying everything they tell us?"

"I don't intend to defy, I just need to clear my head. I had a strange dream and I can't go back to sleep." Margaret yawned and rubbed her face.

"Why don't you tell me about it and perhaps discussing it will make it easier to sleep?"

"I really don't remember everything now," he winced, his dream already fading to the back of his mind. Peeta. He knew it was about his beloved son but he was sure Margaret was there too.

"Can I ask you a question without you getting angry with me?" She sighed and leaned against the wall.

"You were so cruel to Peeta as a child. Why is that? Why have you always been so hateful to him?"

"I wasn't hateful."

"Margaret, I remember when he was born. You refused to hold him. Refused to touch him or nurse him. You called him a curse. I don't understand why. I never have."

"Why are you dragging out the past, Bran? The boy is eighteen years old. And he certainly doesn't take stock in what I say anymore."

"You're wrong. Peeta has always sought your approval. He always did what he could to please us. Boys are good luck, Margaret, so why did you hate him upon his birth?" Margaret huffed and played with the blankets instead of answering her husband.

"I'm not going to stop asking," he said lightly. "You may as well tell me while we are discussing it."

"I wanted a daughter, Bran," she said, finally looking him in the eyes. "You promised me a daughter and I just kept waiting. Everyone said it would be a girl. Do you remember the night of Peeta's birth?"

"So clearly," he said with a smile. "It was a calm night. You did so amazing, right up to the end. But you wanted me to bring your brothers to help you."

"You wanted someone else," she sniffed. "You tried to bring that-."

"Violet was the district's Healer! I wanted to make sure you and the baby were safe!"

"I told you I never wanted to see her face again. And you insisted on bringing her. My brothers were perfectly capable. We were the children of the Apothecary."

"Alright. I apologized for bringing her. But what does this have to do with anything?"

"It was a blood moon. It's extremely bad luck and I knew the baby was coming and I didn't want to give birth under a blood moon. Who knows what kind of demons could be summoned when a blood moon was in the sky? I tried to hold out. I wanted the baby to be born at dawn. A sunrise baby. But no. He wouldn't wait. He was born at the stroke of midnight, with a blood moon. And I know you wouldn't notice but the birth was hard, Bran. Harder than the others. He fought me the entire time. That was my last chance to have a daughter. Instead it was a son."

"But he was beautiful," Bran shook his head. "All blonde curls and rosy cheeks. He was perfect and he came from you." Margaret crossed her arms over her chest and stared at the blankets. Bran was shocked to see a tear rolling down her cheek.

"I was scared," she said softly. "Of what he could be capable of. My brothers said he would be a curse to the family. He was already a curse to me."

"Peeta was never a curse to anyone," Bran protested. "And your brothers were foolish to believe such a thing! Do you know what I heard the next morning? About my wife and son?" Margaret swallowed and looked up at him.

"That he was twice blessed. That being born under the blood moon was a good omen. The old woman told me the myth of the blood moon, that it means that the sun and moon are at conflict. And the one born under it is prophesized to cease that conflict. To restore peace and harmony to the world. I believed it even more when I saw what a gentle child he turned out to be. And that my wife, who had delivered the blessed baby, would have happiness for the rest of her days." Margaret's face hardened immediately.

"And you don't think that's a foolish prophecy? You think I have been HAPPY all my days?"

"Margaret-"

"You don't think I see how you look at her? How I think of the two of you, together, and wonder how I could ever have measured up to that? You don't think it MATTERED to me?"

"Margaret, please-" he reached out to calm her but she flew into a rage.

"Don't you touch me! Don't you ever touch me again! After having your hands on… Seam filth! Don't even think of it."

"Margaret, it was so long ago. Why do you do this to yourself? I told you, she means nothing to me-"

"And you still LIE to my face, Bran! After all these years, after her husband lies cold in the ground, your heart still beats the same for her! And it has never beat like that for me!" She wrapped her arms around herself and hid her face in her hand. Bran swallowed deeply, squeezing his eyes shut.

"I have tried to make amends. I have tried to love you, as you wanted me to. You won't let me, Margaret. And you insist on punishing OUR son for MY mistake."

"Don't you dare speak to me about punishments! You know NOTHING about punishments." His brow furrowed in confusion.

"If you mean to say that I have punished you-"

"Not YOU, you fool! My soul will burn for my mistakes. And I have not tried to make amends as you have. I don't even know where to start. It is the truth that sets my soul on fire, as it has done for years and years."

"Then perhaps it is time for the truth to come out? I will help extinguish the flames, Margaret. I'm here to listen."

"You will judge me," she snapped, shaking her head.

"I don't judge," he said gently. "Even if I did, who would I be to judge? You know of my truths. Set your soul free, Margaret. I hate to see you in pain like this. And it seems that it has only gotten worse over time. Please let me in. I know I have no right to ask this but please… trust me." Her eyes flashed and she looked as if she would hit him. But she surprised him again by melting into his arms and sobbing into his shoulder. He wound his arms around her, rocking her gently, as he had done with his baby boy so many years ago.

"You have made such sacrifices," her voice was muffled by his shirt. He knew exactly what she was referring to.

"It's my burden to bear. And so I shall for the rest of my days."

"I don't hate Peeta, Bran. I just… never saw him the way you do. Twice blessed. A resolution to conflict. He was conflict in my womb. I thought him bad luck. I treated him as such. And he still grew into a kindly young man."

"Don't speak of him as if he's no longer with us, Margaret," Bran pleaded. "I can't bear it. He will come home to us. When he does, will you apologize?"  
"I don't know if I can," she pulled away from him and he immediately missed her warmth. "Isn't it better to let him think I'm a miserable old witch?"

"Better for whom, sweet? I know Peeta will be overjoyed to hear his mother does cherish him."

"Will he? His wife despises my very existence."

"That's due to the way you have treated her, Margaret. You could start by apologizing to her, you know."

"I can't Bran. I have brought such pain to that family, I can't face them to apologize." Bran tilted his head, his mouth moved wordlessly.

"I don't understand."

"I'll tell you, Bran. Because you promise not to judge and perhaps you will be able to share the pain these flames bring."

"I'll share the pain, Margaret. I'll carry your burdens for you. Just tell me."

They talked late into the night and well into morning. Bran had deep circles under his eyes and Margaret's face was red from crying. Bran could say nothing, so he went to the bathroom to wipe his face, quickly dressed, and left for breakfast. Margaret sat still on the bed and rather than following her husband, she burrowed under the blanket and pulled it over her face. She had to admit, her soul felt slightly better, as it usually does when the truth is told, but she still couldn't help but hope that the blanket might suffocate her as she slept. It would save her from the pain of having to tell anyone else the truth that consumed her so.

* * *

Finnick sat across from Katniss, a broad grin on his face. She glanced up at the entwined hands and smiled.

"I can finally see your face, Odair, and it's not attached to your wife's right now! What a shock!"

"Couldn't deprive the district from seeing such a lovely thing," Finnick winked and grunted when Annie elbowed him in the stomach.

"So crass, Finnick. How are you doing, Katniss?"

"Impatiently waiting," she shrugged. Finnick nodded and glanced up at the Head table, where Coin, Boggs, Plutarch, Gale, Beetee, and Haymitch were all eating breakfast.

"Still no decision?"

"None! And it's been two days! Peeta is in 2, Finnick, I have to go!"

"I'm sure you will but you to follow the rules. Remember that Peeta's fate is in your hands. If you mess up, the tribunal could order his execution when he returns. Now's not the time to be rash, girl on fire." Katniss sighed, knowing he was right.

"I'm just… I'm just ready, Finnick. I have been almost 2 months."

"I know, baby girl. And we'll get him back. Just be patient. Let them discuss the war details while you dream of being in your love's arms again."

"But you should also remember that you are fighting a war," a stern voice made her pause as two more people joined their table. She frowned at Vick, who helped Posy sit next to him.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"Look, I know you are dreaming of being reunited with your husband and everything, but you are still the Mockingjay. You are the reason Panem is at war. YOU are the one who can help us end Snow's reign once and for all."

"I think Katniss knows this already," Annie said gently.

"I'm not sure she does," Vick shoved food into his mouth. "Or she's lost sight of it."

"I haven't lost sight of anything, Vick. It's not a crime to want my husband back."

"But at what cost? All I'm saying is, I hope when the time comes to fight, you won't back down. You will stand strong, hopefully with your husband at your side."

"You're starting to sound a lot like your brother," she spat. Vick shrugged as he continued to eat.

"Katniss, are you leaving again?" Posy asked, her eyes wide. Katniss's face softened and she stroked the little girl's hand.

"I have to, Posy, I have to go find my husband. You want Mr. Peeta back safe and sound, right?"

"Yeah! He brought me food!" Vick rolled his eyes but Katniss smiled.

"He's in trouble, Posy. And I'm going to go save him."

"Sign me up," Rory said cheerfully as he slapped his tray down. Vick stared at his brother.

"Come again?"

"I'm going with Katniss to 2. Gale and I think she needs to have as many soldiers as she can, especially when we take control of the Nut. Ryen and Madge are coming too."

"We get to attack some peacekeepers? Count me in," Johanna Mason whistled. Katniss huffed; this table was getting much too crowded.

"We are going to attempt to get District 2 to surrender," she said slowly. "Hopefully there will be no fighting. No attacking peacekeepers."

"Oh I don't mean I will go after your honey, but I do need to let off some steam. Being cooped up underground is making me crazy. I need to smash something. Like a skull."

"Ooooh," Posy's face shone and her eyes were wide.

"Not in front of children," Katniss snapped. Johanna snorted and blew a kiss to Posy.

"As a former Peacekeeper myself, let's keep the skull smashing to a minimum. I know a lot of those guys in 2. They're just following orders, they don't necessarily believe Snow is right."

"Then they should be brave enough to stand up to the Capitol," Vick said bitterly.

"To what point and purpose," Rye shot back. "Until this rebellion, no one thought of standing up to Snow. And if they did, they were killed. We need numbers and now we finally have them. Don't hold it against them if they were too scared to do something until now." Vick looked ready to say something else but Rory nudged him and shook his head. Katniss was saved from saying anything else when Coin and Boggs approached their table.

"Soldier Mellark," Coin nodded to Katniss.

"President Coin. Have you made a decision?"

"We have. We'll compile a list of soldiers to accompany you. Please be at the hangar at 2100 hours."

"Yes ma'am. Thank you!" Coin nodded and Johanna grabbed Boggs's hand as he followed Coin.

"I want to go too, Colonel. Pretty please."

"Are you a soldier, Miss Mason?"

"I'm a Hunger Games Victor and that's damn close enough," she snarled.  
"Easy Jo," Haymitch set a hand on her arm. "I'm sure Colonel Boggs would be happy to have as many willing and capable soldiers as he can." Boggs's lips tightened.

"I'll pass around the list. Any of you who wish to submit your name must appear at training in one hour. Our Commander will test your strength and decide who is capable of being part of the squad. This includes you, Soldier Mellark." She nodded, her jaw set.

Finnick kissed Annie's hand and snapped his fingers at Johanna.

"Give me the list."

"Finnick… you should stay here. With Annie." Katniss noticed how Johanna's face had softened along with her tone.

"Annie understands that I want to fight, don't you honey?"

"Yes. And I know that Finnick isn't one to just sit back and do nothing. Katniss needs as much strength as possible. Hunger Games Victors are excellent fighters. Well… most are," she finished, shrugging half-heartedly. Katniss reached for her hand.

"I don't expect you to come with us, Annie, and I don't blame you in the slightest. I would rather everyone stay behind and stay safe. I don't like everyone risking their lives for me."

"Don't get me wrong, sunshine, we are going to protect you but this is much bigger than you and Peeta," Finnick said, not unkindly. "Many of us have been waiting for this for years. I agreed to join the rebellion over eight years ago."

"Three for me," Johanna said, passing Rory the pen. "Haymitch approached me after they killed my brother. He was the only family I had left."

"My point, Sunshine, is that people have been waiting for this… for you… for a long time now. You're the symbol, like your father was, and yes we will fight for you. But we're also fighting for freedom. For our future. For our childrens' futures." Katniss looked from Finnick to Johanna, then to the Hawthornes, whom she had grown up with. She knew how they had all grown up, freezing in the winters and desperate for their next meal, but she had thought that the other districts fared better than they had.

She was wrong. Each Victor had a story. Each refugee had a reason for being here.

Each soldier had a tragedy in their lives that drove them to rise up and fight.

Katniss stood up with her tray.

"I'm going to get ready. See you all at the hangar." Finnick whistled as Katniss walked away.

"Tonight, I think we're going to see the Mockingjay really spread her wings."

* * *

Peeta heard the door open and he blinked the blood out of his eyes. His cell was dark and he strained his eyes to see who had entered. Rebel soldiers had been coming and going from his cell all day, some of them showing him how they felt about him before they left again. His face ached and his hair was wet with blood from his last "talk" with the rebels. He tried to sit up but he felt his ribs were bruised and the chains were cutting into his wrists.

"Who's there," he said loudly, wincing at how weak his own voice sounded.

"I apologize for my soldiers' treatment of you, General. I have instructed them to stay away from your cell until we can reach some sort of decision."

"Decision? Do you intend to execute me?"

"It's not my intention but many of my soldiers have been calling for that very thing. They say you are a Loyalist. And you yourself admitted that you are here to destroy refugee camps."

"I also admitted to you that it is not my wish to harm anyone, and that I ask for your help in assisting me to escape from the Capitol, Commander Lyme. My loyalties are not to the Capitol. Or to Caius Snow." The Commander stepped into the light and Peeta drew a breath. He had spoken to the intimidating woman earlier that day and had told her the truth. Most of it anyway. He had not mentioned Katniss or the fact that he was trying to get to 13. But he did tell her that he came from the Capitol and was trying to get away from it. She was a Rebel Commander so if anyone could help him now, it would be her.

If her soldiers didn't kill him first, of course.

"Who are your loyalties to, General? You are a Peacekeeper and First General of Panem. Whose side are you on?"

"I seek justice, Commander, and freedom for the country. For the districts. I have lost a great deal of my memories but I do remember that the Capitol is not my home." Lyme stood with her hands behind her back. She had a stern jaw and her eyes narrowed.

"I have spoken to someone about you. She asks that I pardon you for your transgressions and keep you safe from the rebels and the peacekeepers alike."

HIs heart hammered in his chest.  
"She?"

"The Mockingjay, General. Do you remember her?"

"I wish I remembered more but I see her more and more clearly in my mind. Is she coming here?"

"You understand, General, that I cannot free you until we are absolutely certain that you do not intend to murder her." Peeta released a choked gasp.

"Murder her?"

"Attempt to lie to me and tell me those are not your orders. That Snow hasn't told you to find her and kill her. She is the symbol of this rebellion, after all. How convenient it would be, then, for her to come to find her lost husband who just so happens to be a lapdog to the Capitol. As soon as we release you, you will ask to be alone with her and you will-"

"NO!" Lyme's brow raised, as Peeta trembled in his chains. He glanced up at her and hung his head again.

"No. I will not lie to you, Commander. Snow did order me to kill her. He has been poisoning me for ages, willing me to forget her and everything I am. And it has worked. I only have flashes of memory here and there. I couldn't tell you my parents' names, or my favorite color. I can't remember our wedding day, or how I proposed to her. But I can tell you that her name takes my breath away. That I see her face in my mind's eye and it makes my heart race. That I could never fathom harming her, even before I had any idea who she was. When Snow first gave me the orders, I felt strange, like it was wrong. Now I want to do everything I can to get back to her and help her fight this war. I may not remember much, Commander, but I know that I love her."

"Passionate words, General," she spoke in a low voice. "But I have been around the Capitol for many years. I know their ways. Your impassioned plea for your wife may yet be another one of the Capitol's tricks. So we will continue to hold you here, until she arrives in 2. I will arrange a guard outside, to ensure you are no longer at the mercy of our soldiers. But know this, General. If you are lying and you really are here to kill the Mockingjay, you will be begging for death in the end. Hunger Games Victors are not known for their leniency or understanding." Peeta squeezed his eyes shut and nodded. Lyme opened the door and his head snapped up once again.

"One moment, Commander!"

"Yes?"

"I was traveling with a young woman. The Capitol made me believe that she is my wife. She is innocent, in all of this, and I swore to keep her safe. Where is she?"

"I do not know of a young woman, nor would we take action-"

"She may look Capitol, Commander. But she is pregnant and needs your protection. I beg of you." Lyme stood still but Peeta couldn't tell if she was looking at him or not.

"I will do what I can to find her." Peeta started to thank her but the door snapped shut and he was plunged into darkness all over again.

Sighing, he shifted to the side, trying to get comfortable. Whether he was on the Capitol's side or the Rebel's side, he was always in a dark cell, sore and hungry and questioning his fate. He was becoming quite tired of that fact.


End file.
